FELLOW TRAVELERS EP 3 REACTION - It breaks my heart to see this happen... 😭🏳️‍🌈  

He is such a talent and I’m glad he’s getting the recognition he deserves. He is outstanding in this role. Couldn’t be happier with Jonathan and Matt for this show. Two phenomenally talented openly queer actors. More of this please Hollywood!!!

@@JackieRossLavender Jonny and Matt are both superb, but now Jelani Alladin and Noah Rickets are coming into their own, and I can't wait to see how their characters develop.

@@dalebeverly7868 yes yes yes. Not a weak link among this cast! So fabulous!

And Noah and Jelani both played Kristof in the Frozen musical!

You are not alone in all that you are feeling. I’ve had hundreds reach out to me by DM or email who feel exactly the same way. Also please know that the young LGBTQ may not have a full understanding and probably never will… but we’re trying to understand ❤️

Thank you for telling your experience. I’m 40, straight, italian and know very little about this. Do you feel like how the young people is reacting to Hawk is fair? I feel like his behaviour is understandable because of when he was born and what he lived through. He has so much trauma I can’t really find him at fault for defending himself and the people he loved the only way he knew how

I binged all 8 episodes this weekend. I’m 68 and lived within the protective bubble of ignorance while I was in school, mainly bc no one was out. I do remember the McCarthy era as it related to communism. Once I started working, I went to a blood bank lecture at the beginning of the AIDS epidemic, hearing that at least 10% of the population was gay. I hate to say it, but I found this statistic to be unbelievable until I started to research LGBTQ history, ashamed of being blind to what was going on in my world without being aware. When I watched this, it was with a 72yo married gay friend who experienced so much of this. Now, I have a happily married gay daughter. I have encouraged her to watch this to try and understand how different it is now. She came out to me when she was 16. She had heard stories from a gay uncle who was there at Stonewall. She was SO fortunate that, as she met the person she wanted to spend her life with, marriage became legal. She knows that she doesn’t truly grasp the horror of watching so m ashy people die and understands that she will only learn it as a history lesson. Once I dealt with it at work, I became much more involved with LGBTQ issues. Watching this is SO difficult for people who lived during this time bc we KNOW that it’s real. My thoughts go out to you. You have memories that cannot he erased. Y

100% agreed. He is outstanding.

Can’t believe he was passed over for a Golden Globe.

Ong

Exactly… It’s hard for Hawk with his childhood experience, persecution by his father, military life… he has lived his life to please others whilst doing what he wants in the shadows… He loved Tim from the moment he saw him, & vice versa… It’s a tragic love story…

Thank you so much for sharing. As I've said I can only imagine how hard it was for your generation of gays and I am very humbled and filled with gratitude for the freedoms I have had the pleasure of having in my lifetime. My promise to your generation is I will never stop fighting for us or telling your stories. They deserve to be told. Thank you! ♥️

@@JackieRossLavender I can't begin to tell you how important the storytelling is in not only maintaining but furthering the freedom and privileges that have been gained. If not for the storytelling that blossomed bittersweet from the early AIDS crisis, the loss of that generation could very easily have resulted in history reverting to that clandestine myth making and tribal mythology portrayed in this series due to the absence of a generation of gay men. Keep up the wonderful and critical service you provide. Believe it or not, I doubt I'm a rarity amongst late middle-aged men for whom RU-vid is a major component of my entertainment and social media presence.

Yes indeed! Explained a lot about old Donny.

I heard somewhere that some people theorize he may have actually had a crush on Donny, kind of like he had one on Schine. I haven't really compared pics of Schine and 70's DT, but apparently, they are sort of the same type.

Trump is a conman. A poor excuse of a human being..Hevshits his pants quite often. A video exists of the Turkish head of state sitting next to Trump as he loudly farts and fills his depends. Diaper Don!

thanks! Loving this show!

@@JackieRossLavender , I have cried at every episode so far. It's just beautifully heartbreaking. I can't sing it's praises enough. See you next time 😊

Sorry Caz I’ve only now seen the rest of your original comment. I’m hearing so many stories from people who lived both through the lavender scare and the aids epidemic in the 80s and it breaks my heart. I am doing a lot of research of the coming months because I want to make a short film/mini doc about the lavender scare. Couldn’t agree with you more about the show. I’m finding it really hard to fault it in any way. Appreciate the love ❤️❤️❤️

@@JackieRossLavender That’s because I commented immediately & then I updated my comment later on as I watched your review. I think it’s wonderful that you are doing research & will look out for when it’s done. Love from London x

I'm so sorry that you were in an abusive relationship and I'm so happy to hear that you were able to get out of it and far away from that person. But I do not think that Hawk has displayed signs of being a narcissist. Is he slightly manipulative, absolutely. but you literally HAD to be to survive in that time. He has shown GENUINE empathy after he's hurt people... A narcissist wouldn't. Hawk may have other mental health issues, potentially. But he wouldn't be diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder in current day from what we've seen of his behavior/psychology in the show.

@@AnxietyRat agree with this. Echo that I'm SO glad OP was able to get away from their abusive relationship and that no one should ever have to go through that!!!! But also agree there's a stark difference between that and Hawk's actions *in the context of this time period* - the context is so important here. You can tell most if not all of Hawk's actions that are more negative are driven specifically by the dangers of the world they lived in. You made excellent points on the differences in your comment too.

@@fearlesssfcappuccino yeah, Hawk showed that he felt bad because he gave Eddie a SIGNIFICANT amount of money after learning that the kid had tried to kill himself... Someone who was abusive and narcissistic wouldn't do that. I agree the context of the time period that they're in is incredibly important and it explains a lot of their behavior. It doesn't necessarily excuse it.... he still being kind of shitty to the people that he's having sex with, for sure.... But it's what HAD to be done and back then if you wanted to keep your job. If you were outed as homosexual you pretty much weren't able to be hired anywhere, from what those of that time period of told me. And that would turn into homelessness and potentially prostitution since people needed food to eat and survive, right?... so yeah their actions are because it was kind of life and death. Desperate people can do some very cruel things to save their neck. So people had to be cruel even if they didn't want to be like with Mary throwing her partner under the bus to be able to keep her job and apartment. Within the context of the time period... things make a lot more sense. And since it's a historical show you have to take that historical context into consideration when you're viewing it... you CAN'T view it through a modern lens. But yeah, through a modern lens I would say Tim and Hawks relationship is a VERY unhealthy one. In many different aspects... but even just specifically zooming in on their BDSM dynamics. It's unhealthy even within the BDSM community. If they lived in modern day I would urge Tim to not see Hawk again because he doesn't treat him very well....not as well as he deserves, IMO. but again, we can't look at it through a modern lens.

@@AnxietyRat He was also crystal clear form the very beginning they will never have a 'true' relationship that Tim craves

Read the book..its informative and extensively detailed.

It'll piss you off and make you even more apathetic

Bess you that’s very kind of you! Unfortunately, I don’t live in London anymore!

Two very, very different shows dealing with very different aspects of queer issues.

@@JackieRossLavender And more importantly, very different eras.

The fifties in America were not known for its heightened consciousness and sense of boundaries, whatever sexual persuasion you were.

It's quite disconcerting. Power play/kink should not be in the hands of people who can't communicate or aren't emotionally intelligent

Yes this was what occurred to me watching this series. There was no discussion of anything, they just launched into it. Who knows what Tim considers real and not, and how confusing it’d be to have Hawk be sweet at times then dominating at others.

I think back then it was at the beginning of bdsm, they wouldn’t know all that we know now. It’s good they are not into very deep physical domination and it is more of a psychological power play but that can be heavy as well if it doesn’t have boundaries. Tim tops from the bottom sometimes and I am all for that!!! 😍

I think you make an interesting point by the fact that once Hawk cut off Tim and started to live life as a straight man, lying all the time had to take a toll. Wearing masks and living life on the defense - knowing how to express or live his emotions must have been foreign. Hawk may have "survived" but he didn't "thrive" as Tim did. But all their lives they were always missing something...

Thank you so much 🥰

@@JackieRossLavenderRoy Cohn is also known as a big mentor to Donald Trump in his early years. He’s a creepy awful awful man

Well… go figure how Donny would turn out then I guess. Creepy and awful.

@@JackieRossLavender there’s a documentary called “Where’s My Roy Cohn” that as an American I struggled to watch cause it was to scary and real but might give you some more context.

I've heard the book isn't great. I will definitely be adding it to my reading list, however.

​@@JackieRossLavendernot sure why people say that? I loved the book, but it's just not the same as the show.

It’s a devastating watch. I certainly needed the week between each episode to decompress.

Yes, I feel we see a lot of scenes in the 80's where Hawk is regretting not finding the courage to be with Skip. For all his social standing, big houses and the perfect family - he is miserable. I was especially moved by the scene where Hawk is laying on his cot in Skip's hospital room and the roommate is talking about him and his partner taking dancing lessons, OMG the look on Hawk's face, I cried!! And, then of course, we move into one of the best scenes of the show, where Hawk and Tim are slow dancing nude - so happy and so in love.

It’s incredibly important. I couldn’t be happier with this show and the story they are telling.

Excellent summary, thank you! The only thing I might add is that it took until 1986 or 1987 for the HIV antibody test to be developed and made widely available. Those 3-4 years in between were exceptionally stressful on those of us seeing our friends, loved ones and colleagues fall ill and die.

P

Just purchased this today to go along with The Lavender Scare and The Deviants War. Lots of reading for me to do over the coming months.

I've just started reading "Secret City." Thoughtful, thoroughly researched, very well written. A great follow-up to the series. or just on its own as an important part of history.

he may have sung it at private parties..but in public in those days it was only ever performed by women...of course it was a very " queer coded" song and understood as such within the gay community...completely underground as it was at that time

Thank you! Glad you’re enjoying the videos. This series has blown me away!

I had already purchased The Lavender Scare and The Deviants War and have now just purchased Secret City too!

@@JackieRossLavender All three books are excellent resources for the period.

Originally when I first researched it was only listed as 7 but thrilled it’s 8

I mean Skippy is just a pet name. PLENTY of couples have pet names for each other... but it is more common within people who are in the BDSM community like Hawk is. It's also a way for Hawk to slightly emotionally distance himself because he does not use Tim's real name... except in the 80s. But yeah the dominant/submissive dynamic surprised me too. I mean I'm honestly fine with it because I'm into BDSM so nothing has been super surprising regarding their dynamic, to me. It is NOT the most healthiest relationship (but that's kind of to be expected... you don't really see completely healthy BDSM dynamics be portrayed in the media, unfortunately) but it is relatively tame kink-wise compared to some other people I've seen in real life in the community. A lot of vanilla people seem to be quite scandalized by the sex scenes in this show. Lol.

⁠@@AnxietyRatsame! I believe kink back then wasn’t as formed as it is today, it was about experimenting (especially in the gay community) so rules about boundaries, safety and after care were not known yet… My sexuality is very close to theirs so I get their dynamic very well!! With the amount of external trauma of those years it wouldn’t be possible to have a healthy relationship no matter what anyway

@@AnxietyRat Actually Skippy was the name of an angel in an audiobook that Hawk's mother would listen to when he was a child. Hawk had kind of spiritual thing about Tim and started calling him Skippy. Yes, the dom/sub was both light and heavy with these two - but always consensual. Tim did get the power on occasion, which made the dynamic interesting, for Hawk especially!! For me, I thought that each only held the power the other was allowing. I never felt that it was toxic. Hot as hell, tho!!!

The week between episodes is frankly essential to decompress.

They're inflicting the same harm, but McCarthy does it with a machete while Hawk does it with a scalpel.

Hawk is trying to survive and straddle two worlds which is common even today in both straight and gay relationships. He is defined by dad’s disgust and rejection after catching him on his knees satisfying his first attraction. That set his defenses in motion. Most relationships are 60/40, sometimes 70/30. I don’t see him as a monster. I feel sorry for him. Tim gives away his power readily so he is to blame for that. His whining is annoying and cute at the same time. The other guy in the bathroom tells him he would treat him better but Tim prefers the love he knows Hawk has for him, no matter the sacrifice. It’s called drama, tension folks. Definitely mutual…

The difference is that Hawk, at his core, has an undeniable decency and even heroism (however despicable some of his actions), that the hate-filled McCarthy and Cohn, do not have. It's what makes him a genuinely flawed and tragic figure, and makes for difficult complex drama. Keep in mind, too, that Tim, a conservative naif, starts out as a true believer in McCarthy's right-wing idealogy and anti-Communist agenda, though I'd like to think that his character would have evolved sufficiently today to condemn the Log Republicans paying Trump $250,000 for speeches given after he left office. Powerful self-hating gays still exist.

Cabin Republicans paying Trump $250,000 for speeches given after leaving the White House. Powerful self-hating gays still exist in this world, alas.

@@ralphsepulveda5335 That's an interesting thought exercise: What Hawk and Tim would each think of certain specific modern politicians (who were eventually dragged out of the closet, or whose sexuality is an open secret).

I’m reacting to Our Flag Means Death currently too on Patreon and it’s proving to be the perfect contrast to Fellow Travelers!

Do you know where it's available to watch?

@@JackieRossLavender most pay services or torrent 🤑 Hulu Sling Roku Philo Apple TV Vudu Starz