FOMO - the fear of missing out: Bobby Mook at TEDxUNC 

The paradox with FOMO is that we ALWAYS miss out on something. You can do only one thing at a time and there's infinite number of other things you could be doing. My solution to FOMO is to make maximum of the current situation, because when you ignoring present moment you also miss out on that thing you ARE doing!

This topic is so current now more than ever.

My fomo starts when i open social media and there are posts and stories of people i know who are enjoying their lives and I am sitting at home procrastinating on my work. I can't even go outside because my parents don't allow and i don't have friends . Fomo is literally being jealous that i also need that life and being totally helpless about that feeling.

I get physically sick when i get excluded, i cant help it damn even if its not so important :(

I've been in a state of fomo so much lately. Turning 24 has made me really want to enjoy my youth before it is too late but I'm stuck in med school and a lot of my friends have already graduated so I have no one to do anything with. So I sit in my room and scroll through Instagram and observe everyone else enjoying their lives... So here I am watching this video lol

FOMO usually strikes us harder when we miss out on leisure than on work. We have to consider the opportunity cost of each situation and act accordingly.

If you have FOMO ask yourself: Will I care about this a week from now? Do I really want to be apart of whatever that thing is? If so, Why? How will this enrich my life? If so, how will it? Is it really that important? If so, why haven't you thought about it before? FOMO I found comes from having many interests. Which is a good thing. It makes you a more interesting individual. But understand the difference between what interests you and what fascinates you. Chances are you are already doing what fascinates you.

This man described the scenario I’m in right now on spot.

It's so good that FOMO is an ubiquitous part of human experience because it makes me feel that I'm not alone with these feelings.

I’ve felt so sick this whole night cos my friends are out and I wanna be there. like I can’t sleep it sucks.

I had to watch this video because of FOMO :P

That carpet looks like a flat, raw hamburger patty.

FOMO hits harder when you are a perfectionist. The fear of not having the control of your time, seeing the perfect life you want to construct. Having tons of skills, places and hobbies you want to try out. Fear of not having enough time.

"Understand your fear of missing out and do what makes u happy "😊 I'll live by this quote for the rest of my life

I dealt with a lot of loneliness and it seems that that is connected to FOMO, I just feel like I am missing out on a conversation, lets say, in a group chat because I am not on the phone, and those are rare and I enjoy them, so I am constantly checking my phone or even trying to spark a conversation. It feels sad when no one responds or seems like no one has that same desire to share a conversation. I wonder sometimes do my friends have other friends that they are talking or do they not even talk as much I do and I am just making too much out of it? Life is crazy

FOMO for me is usually on a larger scale. As in, I want to be great at all my hobbies, live in lots of different countries, learn multiple languages, keep up with various friendships… I’m not really afraid of missing out on specific moments with people, but rather of not living my life to the fullest. So yes, I like your point about how FOMO pushes us to live and love better. It’s been very effective for me, especially as I’m seeming how life comes in phases. There are already things I planned on doing but lost the chance while I was in that phase… However, balance here is also important. Lately I’ve felt anxious because I’m trying to do too many things and haven’t taken enough time to rest and quiet down my mind. I’m at the point where I think I’ll have to decide what to drop or pull back from, and accept the fact that I will miss out and that’s okay. I need a bit more quality and room to breathe, and less quantity.

For everyone who's reading this: You're great however you are. And if you feel like you are not appreciated well enough, your time will come. Remember, every feeling that you are going through will eventually go away. The good but most importantly the bad as well. I wish you the best and have a GREAT day. Because today is the perfect day for a perfect day...

I'm experiencing this rn cause of my studies, I have a really important exam coming up,missing out on events and parties while I see my friends posting all over the social media, but then I remember it's the choice I have made for myself so that I don't regret later on asking myself how hard I could've worked, that statement "what I could've done" I don't want it, I'll do what's needed to be done, I'll give my 100% on what I'm doing rn and enjoy it later

I can't hardly relate to this at all. For me, I understand FOMO as sitting alone at a park, watching multiple happy families play games and laugh with each other. I see the joy of happy parents with happy kids, and young lovers playing the awkward game of romance... and I sit alone, wishing I had more intimate relationships. Wishing I had my own family, really.

The book "30 Days to Overcome Fear of Missing Out" by Harper Daniels is a helpful

My FOMO is more to do with the future and what significant events I’ll miss after I die, it really makes me feel down.

Thank you. This speech made me appreciate this feeling and inspired to explore life rather than feel like it’s my enemy.

Addressing the problem is one part. The way he presented it and concluded it is another. Almost broke into tears at the end for the way he concluded it.

I disagree. The way he explains it is the fear of the chance of missing out, every time you go onto social media, there’s a chance that there will be nothing there that triggers your FOMO. And there’s a chance that there will be something there. The real fear is knowing that you’re being left out and not being able to do anything about it. The fear of being helpless, the fear of thinking that people have forgotten about you. That’s the real fear. Not any of this social media stuff

I should really stop procrastinating and stop watching RU-vid videos.

'As soon as you press the egrettable finger to the play button' 'key to being happy are connection and accomplishment' 'the fear of missing out compels us to love better...live more' My notes:)

My fomo is to follow every single thought that pop up to know about everything it's kind of perfectionism to be aware of everything and be present everywhere not missing out on single event

solution is at 8:05

I have a colossal case of Fomo. I mean every single little decision requires atleast 5 minutes of thought. My mother always says, which one would you feel guilty for not doing? If you say "Im gonna do it" and your heart sinks, that's probably not what you should do. Ofcourse, it's still difficult and has way more layers, but that helps with narrowing it down. If it's something you could do anytime or more often, do the other thing. I've found that my Fomo I most likely connected to my parents divorcing. Always having to choose rather I should go or just stay at home It sucks, but there's always a way to take the edge off and either way you gotta make a decision

I was the youngest by ten years with both parents full time in their jobs, so I can remember feeling this as long as I can remember. I remember being tired one night as a young child and declining to go to dinner with my mom and sister; I stared at a wall for several minutes and started crying, imagining that they were having a great time while I was home by myself (my dad was asleep) What’s crazy is that my conscious mind is aware of how ridiculous things like that are, but in those moments I get genuinely heartbroken. It’s terrible because it doesn’t make sense to me.

I always feel FOMO when its the end of the year. All people post their favourite pictures and videos of the year i i just feel like i have been stuck..not living my life to the fullest when in reality when i would stop making myself feel bad about anything i would see that i lived my life.

My gf and I are doing long distance. She’s currently going to college. I’ve yet to tell her, but I’ve had a lot of FOMO these last few days. I know I should tell her, but she’s literally moving away from her family for the first time. It feels kinda selfish compared to the struggles she’s having right now. I will maybe bring it up to her later, because I feel bad for hiding this from her. But she’s got so much on her plate. I don’t want to add more to it.

having FOMO honestly sucks and it sucks out my enthusiasm for things I enjoy, just because I am not doing it with others. Though, then again I know my friends wouldn't enjoy it so I can't even invite them...

imagine going through fomo AND handling a breakup with a party animal ........life is torture

Everyone knows what it is , give the solution

Very wise words indeed. Negative emotions are often a signal that something isn't quite right in your life. When you feel negative emotions, your goal shouldn't be to get rid of them or "overcome" them. Your goal should be to resolve the problem at the source.

me a college student, watching this at 10 pm on a Friday night in my pjs - 🧍🏽‍♀️

This comment section is differently knowledgable than the video itself. And I like this.

His speech voice is like a ted talk parody I cant take him seriously -> Edit: I see that my comment was a bit rude. Im keeping it because what I wrote is what I felt but want to underline that I respect this person for going out and giving a public speech about something that I personally struggle with.

The solution is to do your own thing.

Is not fomo just a sense of lack? It seems it’s rooted in jealously, envy and looking outward for an inner approval. In short, it’s all trauma related. Confront your trauma and find inner peace, fomo will evaporate. Peace be with you! 🙏

Excellent speech! I was engaged throuhout the whole presentation.

FOMO is not a problem for me on social or friendship setting unless it’s work related. It’s hard for me to balance work and personal life goals

6:58 Those line punch me like a dart right into my existence...

Is anyone else watching this while experiencing fomo

I love that line you said about committing to our present moment

id love to travel & adventure but also have a fear of being on my own so being on my own is cause of fomo cos i want to be everywhwere with everybody so i dont have to be on my own

🥺❤️ thankyou for making my day a little better

I got to admit: "Am I significant?" is a fear I have had, sometimes, but feels like an ENTIRELY DIFFERENT fear than the FOMO. Those two feeling like entirely different, separate, independent fears to me. Well, break down FOMO into 2 cases; 1. Fear of missing out experiencing things, other things people create 2. Fear of me missing out doing things for other people. FOMO #2 can be construed as a fear of "Am I significant?" But FOMO #1 does not have anything to do with how significant I think *I* am. FOMO #1 is just fear of missing out on fun things.

7:00 I wasn't ready for that...

OH NO, the story he told legit is what is happening to me right now!!!

Hard to realise this video is 7 years old !! The things have only worsen !

It's good that I didn't MISS this video 😅

Speaker: facebook Audience: RAUCOUS LAUGHTER

Fear of missing out is why so many people are in a tremendous amount of debt.

Greetings from a med school at Friday night who is alone at home after all his flatmates went to a big party.. No pain no gain

I’m having trouble with emails. There are so many emails and I want to clean my mailbox but I’m afraid I’ll delete something possibly useful but at the same time it’s so discouraging to open and read hundreds of emails just to make sure I’m not missing anything.

best thing iv heard in a long time

This guy is too relatable

Even when I am watching this am suffering from FOMO. I feel like I need to check emails and lot of stuff.

Opportunity cost vs cost benefit analysis Cost benefit (includes intangible benefits such as mood) Example: gov build a project and have to do a cost benefit analysis that include Inconvienece. So for ppl with fomo... Do that

Contentment is the key to happiness. Oh and having lots of cool stuff.

before this video I got an ad that said "Don't risk missing out" and now I'm scared

Thank you so much ❤❤❤❤

Best solution for FOMO in the first page of RU-vid.

You can look at FOMO from the perspective of personal resources allocation. I think I won't be too much off, if I say that every human action requires certain amount of resources to accomplish. Whether it's time, money, emotions, different material goods and items, it doesn't matter, what matters you spending resources to get whatever. And usually when you start feeling FOMO and fantasizing about missed opportunies in your head, you never consider resources that you would have to spend on the thing. You have a feeling that you are missing out on something that was given for free to everyone, expect you. In reality, though, everyone had to sacrifice certain amount of their limited resources to do/get the thing for which you've paid literally nothing. One more thing. Someone in the comments already has mentioned opportunity costs. Similar to the above calculations of the resources required for making missed out opportunity a real thing, you don't appreciate what you gained due to not participating in the said activity and doing something else instead. From the looks of it our brain tries to block all rational thinking, whenever we encounder a situation which can potentially cause FOMO feeling.

had to do a surgery next week and was quarantining for 2 weeks now. I was invited to go to a couple parties and seeing their insta stories and everything it always looked so fun :( I feel so missed out

If I got a message from people at an obnoxiously loud and bright party, I'd think: "Thank god I'm not there, that sounds horrible."

I am an orthodox Muslim and I know highly educated Muslim saints who do not use technology much. Genuine faith is the best way to overcome FOMO.

Great talk!

Thank you for this, hope we easily learn this

FOMO problem made me come here in 2020

Excellent! GREAT speaker!

This can also be applied to gaming, where those infected with FOMO will buy every new release, play it for a month, and completely abandon it.

1:10 I was watching this video in 10pm at FRIDAY night 😂😂😂 what a coincidence

Watching this before high school graduation

Idk if anyone would reply to me. Someone pls give me advice....all my best friends are going on a Disney Trip in May that I was suppose to go on, but my mom didn’t want me to go anymore because she felt it wasn’t safe. Now, that’s where my Fomo kicks in because for the past few weeks I’ve been crying because I can’t go and because I’ll be left out from all my friends. What scares me is that my friends don’t won’t want me around anymore because of how close they’ll all get in the trip. I’m scared they’ll forget me but idk what Will happen to me if they do leave.

Atleast I got to know what i am going through . Yes I do suffer from fomo but I'll make sure it leads me to something good. In the end I'll be someone better .

I’m dealing with being missed out so I have too much fear I’m dealing with all of that it worries me now I feel like I’m a failure it’s scary I am afraid I’m going to lose what I was before i was so much passionate I’m scared of it scared that the people I had will find someone sweeter than me which i hope it won’t happen

Great Video! That man can talk!

I didn't watch da vid but this voice is amazzing😪

I have so many issues and I am glad this is not one. Who cares if my friends are partying or partied without me? I guess some do.

Was chill til I got shanked with the “will I be remembered”

Thankyou for this

So I graduated high school and now I’m in college. I did band my two last years of hs and I miss it already. My bf is still there and I just feel like I’m missing out on band still. They’re playing at football games, going to competitions, and Idk. Even though I’ve graduated and done that, I can’t shake the feeling that I’m not there anymore. I should be but I shouldn’t. Just thought I’d share my story.

This helped.

That got really real at the end jeez

I might get one cell phone call a month and pretty well zero text messages. How? Easy, I don't hand out my number. The phone is there to serve me, to make an advance hotel reservation when I am on vacation or if I happen to have an emergency (ultra rare). I am not going to be a slave to it. And in the end, if you looked at all the text messages going back and forth, you'd laugh at the content.

FOMO and my need for approval from society really f'ed my life up. I'm done with that.

That was 2014 !!! What will he say if he see 2019

Agree

That was amazing!

All my friends, they all do everything without me

Now with most companies using this effect for marketing their stuff with buzzwords like limited supply and “drip”, this is more relevant than ever.

Fomo alone it what caused my relationship to fall apart. My ex had responsibilities like picking up the kids. Birthdays . Mom stuff . But any party or event came up she had to be there. To put out a name for her self. It's sad because she wants to be popular so bad. But she's almost 35

Today on 🎃, I face my FOMO fear. Going to play Silent Hill and watch an Alien 🎥 😃

im having trouble with fomo with my church youth group doing things that i cant be apart of because of my age. im supposed to be in highschool but i was started late. so when the highschool does something that i miss out on i feel so left out anyone have any advice for me

anyone else here because you cant join outings bcs of school priorities and what not?

I goto to youtube to do my study or things that is related to my job, but end up wasting my time and concentration at watching stuffs that are knowledgeable but actually not helpful to my life. I lost my judgement and forget the purpose I come to youTube or social media. Most of the time I watched social media or youtube stuffs just to entertain myself and prevent myself from getting bored. But now i think it is ok to feel bored, we need to spend more time ourself doing yoga and exercise. Stop using social media and write down purpose for using youtube, this will prevent us from wasting time and concentration.

Such a weak society we have today... the "fear" of missing out? It's such a first world problem. Along with finding gluten free, non gmo food and trying to keep up to date with the newest iPhone. I've been to people in developing countries. They have no fear of missing out because they deal with what could be considered extreme circumstances. I think we've become weakened by our reliance on finding pleasure rather than finding purpose. There's no such thing as a fear of missing out, just a weak society dependent on social acceptance.