Loved your explanation on masculinity and femininity and the roles they play . I think nowadays because of the feminism and toxic masculinity, men have become more lazy and not stepping up to their roles of being a provider and knowing what their duties are as a man. Also women have been pressured into becoming this high flying career woman and the thing of not needing a man to rely or protect her etc and having children is risky or you don’t have enough money to have a child etc. This is completely false as the women who chose career over family always regret it later in life. Also what I saw with women who travel abroad alone might say they’re independent and show this power of feeling free to travel by themselves, where in reality they sleep with men and use men abroad to have a sense of protection when they’re away from home and then dump them when they return back home.
Chris you have a very luminous soul, I really enjoyed experiencing it today. You have a lot to teach the young men of this country. Well done and look forward to seeing you on Rogan. You deserve a very large audience.
"Work towards being the type of person who the type of person you want to be with wants to be with" Some how in almost 30 years I never once thought about it that way.
Some say become like the woman you want. I don't like that. I'd rather say bewhat you want, and then want a woman who is like yourself. The first one sounds like selling your soul, and weak
@Ty Bey it might be what they really mean when they say it, just wrong choice of wording. I think it's important though to distinguish between just being your unbalanced self and being your best self
I think it's important to know yourself to the point where you understand which values and elements of your life are "non-negotiable". The things that make up you, and that you will not compromise or give up. And then you also figure out the other things you are willing to change and comprommise for a partner. Then you work on those you can change, to mold them into "more attractive" features for the type of partner you want. But without losing yourself in the process... if that makes sense. Of course that process will continue to happen when you do find a partner, and you begin to live together.
here's what I think he is saying , he's not talking about a particular woman instead he's talking about the idea of the perfect women for you . for example I admire women that are ambitious and intelligent and kind and in order to attract a woman with those traits I need to have the traits in me first@@formless4541
The topic of potentially lacking male role models for youngsters is one which resonated with me especially, thank you Ali, Chris, Angus and behind the scene related people! Raza :)
Yes biology, plays a part in our dating preferences. It plays a massive part in what makes women want to have babies when they reach a certain age. Great dialogue on this.
I agree! Women have desire just like men do...that's why I have a problem with Logan Ury's (current modern dating expert) token phrase 'f...ck the spark'- as a response to fixing the flaws of online dating- we need to get back to, embrace our natural biology more- natural desire is a beautiful thing!
Great topic and conversation. Great that Chris includes an evolutionary psychology into his view of masculinity in femininity. As much as we want things to be fair, our brains are still running on years of evolutionary conditioning and survival. I think you should do more podcasts on dating. Good insight on how women decrease their chances of marriage if they are at the top of their game. I wonder what this says about how the genetic pool is filled with when the brightest are struggling to find partners and reproduce 🤔.Please do more of these !
Chris, i was really suprised to hear about your past, it really opened my eyes to how driven you are. Plus i really like Jordan Peterson, and can see you've been influenced by him.
Don't complain about being ugly unless you have perfect skin, white teeth, a six pack, a great style, an interesting life, and an excellent grooming routine. I thought I was ugly, but I just got all those and I'm not.
1:29:30 - "Just be yourself" is the one thing that legitimate pickup students were told their whole lives and it failed them miserably (and not all pickup gurus are manipulative, deceitful players, just most of them). Girls do NOT want a socially awkward nerd to be himself, he needs to learn to be a better version of himself. That's how this ties in to the problem of authenticity and honesty in dating - you can't communicate at all if you don't learn the basics of the language (confidence, hygiene, grooming, social skills), but learning the language is not the same as manipulating and deceiving girls in that language. That's the true place of pickup in the new paradigm - don't lie, just become a better you.
I remember when I told a friend of mine I was going to buy a house (while i was in college, before 2 Masters), and he said "now you're going to have to find a man with two houses", and I thought it was a strange thing to say, but boy was he right.
It was good to see this side of Chris. I've come from Chris' RU-vid channel, but I see you've had MrWhoseTheBoss on and I love his content too, so will just have to subscribe and watch all your vids now 👍🏼
Wow. So Chris Williamson has discovered the truth of the Book of Ecclesiastes - all is vanity - but he hasn't discovered the true reason why he has infinite value as a human being. I hope he keeps searching. He's clearly wonderfully curious so I'm hopeful that he will keep looking and as long as he goes on being honest he'll find the true answer.
Except he’s someone who uses his mind… and reading Genesis where “God” apparently doesn’t understand why women bleed and pronounces it a curse and places them under subjugation would be pretty hard to believe. Why don’t you research how the New Testament was put together? Hint: Catholic Church (politically connected degenerates) chose the books that would best serve the rulers. I believe in Creator. We don’t need toxic filters to connect with Creator. That connection is natural and inside us. It’s much more than a belief system that boils down to “because it says right there.” 🙄
Absolutely brilliant podcast, many thanks! I really got me thinking about loving myself for who I am vs. What I do. And I realised that my children absolutely and without a doubt love me for who I am and not for what I do, and they have taught me to do the same. So having kids will improve your life in that way as well. I should have had more.
I have never looked at a partner's job, education, or money status. At the end of the day, you are with a person for his or her personality and your compatibility.
At at the level of Virtue we can and should expect complete parity between men and women - Truth, Beauty, Goodness, Kindness, Courage, Excellence, Perseverance to name a few. We have seen many examples of such qualities throughout history in both sexes. Much of your discussion centred around historical social constructs which can be changed and do not have to be set in stone forever. Rather a flexible approach suited to meet the ever changing demands of the age in which we live would be more appropriate. An analogy for both men and women might be a Tree with deep roots which bends and sways when the wind blows from multiple directions thus strengthening the tree ( this is backed up by science - trees in a windless environment do not thrive as well) whilst keeping strong roots. Currently we are all buffeted about like leaves in the wind according to the social constructs and trends of our time - Often the young and their life Teachers alike…You are right about the lack of role models… Lastly, an area we need to look into is equality in motherhood/ parenthood…This might include new levels of respect for a job of the highest order which raising the next generation is - Really interesting Discussion. Your aims are laudable. Thank you!
Overall and interesting and insightful conversation. What I can't understand, though, is how he believes that there are more rolemodels for women than for men when the majority of wealth is still held by men, the biggest companies are led by men, most politicians are men, scientists with most publications are men etc. I think in terms of success (if defined by status and/or wealth) there are still soooo many more role models for men.
@ 45:12.... My biggest takeaway. Just WOW! ALI: What do you mean by love yourself? CHRIS: Feel comfortable and feel like you are sufficient independent of how you perform day to day in the world.... stripped of all of your achievements (YT Channel, Podcast, Degrees, etc.) are you isolated and stripped bare still worth something to the world and do you think people would still love you and still care about you?
We should optimise our relationship choises basing on the self-awareness of who we really are, rather than act on limbic/mainstream projections and constructing a fake pesona to adjust to lies.
I would date a guy who is not six feet tall, has no college education, but works his ass off as a tradesman. Like a plumber or a roofer. Or a carpenter, like the guy I have, love, and want. He’s no philosopher wanker, just decent and willing to learn. And laugh. So getting past the party boy mask, shucking it and dropping into authenticity is way cool. Thank you 🙏
Absolutely. What a disappointment to learn that behind his podcast is "how to make money getting university students to waste their valuable years and health by mindless party culture." And getting young women to sell shots? And he calls it satisfying that he paid for his master's program, in cash, with this. And for someone who now talks about how young women destroy their chances of bonding and marriage, family with precisely this kind of life.
Interesting conversation but the women Chris has surrounded himself with through his role as a club promoter, I believe gives a warped view of women in general.
Chris kept on saying that traits of guys such as being wealthy, high status, educated, are not encouraged in the current society. May I know where this is coming from?
I really tried to remain openminded as I listened to all this gender role talk, but this is the same tired argument that I heard from the “bros” in my sociology 101 class back in the day. It was an unexpected check in for me: “Oh, we’re going there. I wonder if they have any new and compelling ideas since last time I heard this in 2008.” “Oh. Nope. Just added some tinder stats. Cool.” It’s odd to have the conversations here usually be about challenging the status quo by reframing the way most people see things, and then listen to this “on average, women/men prefer___.” I wasn’t really offended or anything more just like, disappointed there wasn’t more depth to the conversation. On another note regarding role models: I think there is way more to this convo that I’d love to here you get into, Ali. I, and I would imagine many others, don’t have anyone on a pedestal as a general role model. I instead have a hodge podge of people with aspects that I admire and hope to emulate. I feel like this is a pretty big departure from how our parents’ generation held role models.
Your comment is almost unintelligible, can you read it back and choose to express your disdain in a way that makes a point? Otherwise it just comes across as solipsistic word salad.
Young women are most attracted to young, fertile, strong men. If we’re talking about EVOLUTION, “money” is a NEW proxy for resources. So if we’re talking about BIOLOGY, women would be choosing the men who could PROTECT and BRING HOME THE MEAT. They didn’t have guns. This took STRENGTH and STRATEGY. To drag home a beast to one’s woman and children took PHYSICAL STRENGTH. Evolutionarily, humans, including men DIED before the age of 35. So young women would not be CHOOSING a man who was OLD. Men do not “age better” than women. This whole evo psych popularity is for old men who want to rationalize going for younger women. However, even modern day young women don’t want a man who needs a pill to prop his pickle. And STUDIES show that sperm from old men (over 35) causes AUTISM at an alarming rate and autoimmune issues for the child. So even from a modern day perspective, young women would want a man who can be a lover without pharmaceutical aid and to have a child from healthy sperm from a young man. And although SOME men can reproduce past 35, it doesn’t come without damage to the LIFE of the child. In fact reproductive science shows that as long as a woman CAN reproduce, what matters most for the health of the child is the age of the MAN giving the sperm. Such obvious points and yet the predilection of humanity to RATIONALIZE around their motivated biases is nearly endless.
His story is laid out here. Went to uni, did club scene stuff, worked up through that, was a blow head reality tv guy, now he does YT. Please tell me what his parents would contribute in any meaningful way to this? Part from *maybe* paying for his uni?
You posted this a while ago but can you explain why it isn't relatable? Also I strangely felt FOMO with it as well. It think it's maybe not going out enough in my 20s or feeling like I lost that time.
@@yasserbostan7156 Because Chris is a naturally smart and athletic attractive guy who started "figuring himself out" AFTER having a successful run in the night club industry. His "failures" would be considered successes to most people.
I HATE all the "Be yourself" psychology nonsense but these two came to a very healthy version of "be yourself." That is don't become someone you wouldn't want to be. Change? Absolutely! But only into a better version of who you feel comfortable being. I think this is how I've always lived but it was articulated well here. Complacency should never be the goal but mask wearing is also not ideal.
Would have liked to hear you guys talk about the birth control pill though. Cause supposedly that's one of the biggest influence on woman's modern day dating changes. Woman who take it prefer much less "Masculine" men. That's the theory I think it was. Edit: Great podcast though.
He was on S1, if you were watching back then and continue. Its definitely a mrs forcing you 😂 dissecting idiots you know, could do that in any town centre or even a trip to Tesco's; they're productive.
On the point of loving people for who they are not what they do…. Ok consider someone incapable of productivity in society like a coma patient or quadriplegic…. Will you say to their face they shouldn’t expect love from others because they don’t do much? This is just a curiosity question not trying to “gotcha”
Press further Chris! Why is it a shame that women are not "allowed" to be as sexually liberal as they want when they are younger? Is it good for women to have lots of different sexual partners? Are you sure?
It’s interesting but also somewhat cringe worthy. I don’t support claims about mens shoulder ratio being the same over our course history as a sign of statutes because it isn’t globally and historically factual. Similarly, facial symmetry equaling fertility is a wild assumption to make (around one hour in). Equating competitiveness and bravery to males is just an outcome of a male dominated system and not at all an outcome of “women are interested in people and men are interested in things”. Lastly, I would love to see some actual data behind the whole “men who marry career oriented women” having erection problems, please. Those are wild claims to make for someone who should be aware how “experimental” their knowledge of science and psychology are. It’s an interesting topic but this niches speakers often just boil down to Dunning Kruger effect people who mention more often than not “imposter syndrome”.
@@ABCDEF-br6it men assumed the physical roles and women assumed the caregiver roles but keep in mind that women were a lot more vulnerable to stand up to men for the longest time. My grandmother for example didn’t work a day in her life, she was beyond a genius, but her husband would literally beat her or threaten to leave her if she didn’t obey him. This was the case up until very recently in most of the world were laws, enforcement and awareness in society didn’t realize how trapped women are. She didn’t even want to marry him, she just wasn’t allowed to have a job back then so her parents made her.
Keep in mind threatening to divorce someone in religious societies & when you can’t work is a much bigger threat (and still is a problem in many countries in the world)
He’s just regurgitating Jordan Peterson takes. Literally word for word. About 40 minutes in he even says his entry point to this pseudo-intellectualism was the same troupe of manosphere dudes every guy like has. Cringe.
Nearly every point spoken about is supported by the work of Rob Henderson, a PhD candidate at Cambridge. You may not like the facts and what they say about human nature, but just casually dismissing the best data we currently have available is simply not a viable argument