I used this video in a talk to young moms to show them how they can damage not only their marriages but their own inner peace by holding a grudge. And the ending tells the whole moral of the story-I won't spoil it!
This was a real fight with a writer and his wife. Apparently this all started when a writer asked the group before a meeting started...."so I think I'm in a fight" explained the suitcase, and the episode was written.
mastermind, you're incorrect. Ray was easily the best part of the show. Though I will admit Marie sometimes gave him a good run for his money. But they were all great. The show would have been worse off if any of them had decided to leave.
they all got along so their collective chemistry made the show. the writing as well. i'm not a believer that one or two individuals makes a show successful.
I think the cast really started to “gel” after a few episodes. I think they were really good. I did feel bad about the one twins passing sad it was suicide.
He was horrible in the begining, you could really tell he had no acting experience, but got rrally good as the show progressed, Jerry Seinfeld on the hand...
Brilliant writing! You are mad at someone your whole life and think you are holding them hostage when the truth is, they don't even know what they did or remember it. You were the hostage all along. Let it go!
What I loved about this show was the unpredictable humor. Debra saying she thought the big fork and spoon were Robert's baby utensils was so unexpected. One of the many reasons this show is a classic.
Angeli Rodriguez the only role Peter played that I hated was in monsters ball, he played a abusive racist, I just didn’t watch him after that, great actor though.
Patti Burton Salmonsen who cares how the fuck you feel 😑 it’s called acting and they play people called characters so take your biased sensitivity and keep it wedged up your ass FYI the world will never be like you want it to be fuck face 😵
@@pattiburtonsalmonsen3202 three years too late but that is the dumbest thing I have ever read. You stop watching somebody because of a character you don't like? Are you that dense?
The scene with Debra and Marie in the latter’s kitchen will ALWAYS be one of my favorites from this show. For once, Marie isn’t pushing an agenda or being manipulative. Her story is clearly coming from a place of love, and her advice, instead of the passive-aggressive things she usually says, is genuinely helpful and well thought out. It shows that Marie really does care about Debra, and that Debra respects Marie and her wisdom, too. Plus Doris Roberts knocks the monologue out of the park-what an actress. :)
I felt her agenda was to make sure her precious baby son doesn't have to do the work his wife ought to have done because she spoke to Debra instead of Ray or to the both of them since this lesson should apply to both not just to the wife. So yes, even in goodness she is subconsciously asserting an agenda.
Yes, but she spoke with Debra because the 2 of them discovered the cheese together and Marie felt inspired to reveal something personal to Debra. It's true that Marie usually has an agenda but her agenda comes from a place of caring for her family which is what distinguishes her from being conniving. And by the way, there are plenty of instances when Marie sees right through Ray's BS and she calls him on it, as most Italian mothers do. She just can't allow anyone else to do so!
@@AH-le3rw That is definitely possible, but I tend to agree with tenisfin. In Marie's story, she's clearly comparing herself to Debra and Frank to Ray (wife and husband); the same story also paints Frank as being in the wrong, so she's implicitly suggesting that Ray is too. Plus unlike other times, when she insinuates that Debra is being unreasonable, here she's essentially accusing Ray of being too stubborn and prideful to move the luggage, especially since she realizes he put the cheese in the suitcase to begin with. And like tenisfin said, the fact that Marie reveals a deep secret JUST to Debra is kind of moving--the fact that she doesn't want Ray in on this story suggests that it's a special moment just for herself and Debra, woman to woman and wife to wife. :)
@@christiankrenek7689 Marie could have said I want to see you and Ray later tonight and talked to them both about give and take in marriage. Instead she placed the onus on Debra to "be the bigger person" when for 45 yrs she would rather hold a grudge and think about the fight in silence than to "be the bigger person." She didn't bring it up with Frank to the point he had even forgotten about it. And it didn't seem like she ever gave the same speech about marriage to Ray, her spoiled brat. So it is double standard and hypocrisy all rolled into one.
The thing with this show is that, in some cases including my own, is that one gets tired of the yelling and the screaming. The drama gets tiresome. It's the disfunction that gets annoying. Yeah, couples fight, but not as frequently as say Frank and Marie or Ray and Deborah. Yeah the love within the family is there, but some people just get tired of the drama. It also falls into a predictable rut of "Ray does X and starts drama over it."
I’ve been married 44 years and whenever someone asks me my advice on a long marriage I always say, “Don’t let a suitcase full of cheese be your big fork and spoon.” Works every time.
Thanks a lot for the advice! It’s better to learn how to share life with each other, rather than avoiding the apposite genders 😄 #Princella #TheQueenMaker
As the old saying goes a woman has a memory span of 50 years we forget nothing. Men however forfet pretty quickly 🤣🤣 in other words Frank has already risen above 45 years of pettiness and passive-aggressive behaviour 🤣
The thing I love about this show is how realistic it was. I can totally see this argument happening and also being the one to take the shirt out and wear it. So perfect
And for many it's forgotten that Greed due to Anger due to Possessiveness due to Desire due to Attachment due to Dwell on things stopped by (Dwell on items) Realising the uncontrolled mind Rise above it. You can reach for peace if you're no longer wallowing in the mud.
I agree because I can relate. I'm moving in the future and I found a lot things and I'm like when did we buy this stuff that my parents haven't seen or used in years.
OMG hilarious. I’m Italian and my grandparents had the same big fork and spoon on the wall in their kitchen with the matching giant wooden salad bowl on the table ….
It'd be funnier if Robert was being sarcastic but we all know how sincere he is. What Debra does all day is her job, just like Raymond working is his job.
So many comments miss the whole point about this episode. Ray and Debra are both wrong - either one could easily have carried the suitcase. Marie’s advice was don’t let a stupid issue like this become a thorn in your whole relationship.
@ Dave Glo I agree with you to an extent that they were both wrong and being petty over a suitcase but Ray behaved far worst here. Just because he "wanted to win" he put cheese in the suitcase went away on a work trip knowing full well the cheese would rot and stink forcing Debra to have to clean the case and take it upstairs thereby making more work for Debra! And he was one the who left there it in the first place.
My wife and I argued over whether toilet paper should roll off the front or the back. We did not fight, but we both felt strongly. I had a dozen solid reasons why rolling off the front was better. She was clearly wrong, emotional, not logical. She did not have a reason. It just felt right to her. Every time either one of us visited the throne we each changed it to the way we liked it -- for years. Then, one day I noticed it had stayed the way I wanted it for several days, maybe a week. I couldn't stand it. I changed it to her way. We both laughed. A month later, I gave her a Christmas card "From now on it will roll off the back. It is a gift I give you. Merry Christmas." That line from Marie is one of the best sayings I have ever heard: "Don't let a suitcase full of cheese be your fork and spoon."
Petty as it was this was one of the best episodes. I just laughed when Ray was telling the story especially the part when he said Debra is wearing a sweater she packed in the suitcase and Ray came downstairs with a wrinkled shirt from the suitcase.
The fact that they were petty to each other is exactly why this episode is one of the best as Marie explains she and Frank had the same fight, but instead of moving past it, they held it against each other for 45 years. The point of the episode is to show it’s better to let go and move on than to hold a grudge until you prove your right.
Marie's words of wisdom live on. I often advise people who bring me into their relationship nightmares to "not let the suitcase full of cheese be your fork and spoon."
I personally LOOOOOVED Debra's intense reaction to Frank broaching the subject of the suitcase. She handled it beeeeeeeautifully and practically threw him out of the house 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 love them both!!!
"When I get back, you better be the only ugly thing that is left in this house" was just a beginning of 45 years of... joy and happiness. Certain shows must part of a curriculum.
This is the BEST ELR episode, and it’s GENIUS. Why “genius”? Because it addresses such a common “couples” issue, and yet heretofore - after YEARS of “couples” sitcoms - it had never been done before. ELR was there first, on a theme that should’ve been already done a million times.
6:26 the groom's side of the church was like a Gypsy camp😂🤣😭 I love Marie lol she reminds me of my grandma. This show is a classic! I still watch it everyday🖤
@Mario1611 Whilst I agree with you I have to say Ray was the pettiest here. He left it there in the first place and expected Debra to take it up empty and put it away and when she refused he put the cheese inside then left for his work trip knowing full well the cheese would go rotten, stink the house out forcing Debra to empty, clean and then take the suitcase upstairs all because he was too lazy and that its considered "wife work"
I had those suspicions too, wanting Debra to give in for her little Raymond, but it was true to form when she relates the story of the fork and spoon....then Frank doesn't even remember where they came from....so funny...Marie was wonderfuly played!
For all Marie's insistence she is a meticulous housekeeper, she somehow has failed to notice the big fork and spoon revealing 45 years of kitchen grime, never, apparently, wiped down that wall sufficiently.
@@12Blueace It is just the age. Color of wallpaper and paint get destroyed by sunlight over time. Cleaning isn't going to do anything, only covering it from sunlight.
Always made me wonder if it was pre-planned so from the very start of the show because since the very first episode until this one the wall paper around the fork and spoon never suddenly became darker.
I will always remember this episode it was hysterical I never laughed so much in my life too bad they didn’t show that little final scenes of the episode with Deborah and Ray fighting over who’s going to be move the suitcase and be the bigger person .. that was truly funny 😄 😅