www.mormonmissionprep.com Funny stories and jokes from the Lord's living prophets and apostles during the October 2013 LDS General Conference, including President Uchtdorf's story about skiing: "I'd fallen and I couldn't get up."
I love the Gospel of Jesus Christ with all of my heart. Every good thing in my life is a result of my Membership in this great Church. I love our Father in Heaven and our Savior Jesus Christ.
Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you. Matthew 7:6
It makes me sad to see all the hate. Especially because the haters don't really understand who these amazing men are and what they do and why they stand up at the pulpit. God has never been wrong, and God has never lied. If he did either of those things, he would cease to be God. So, he will never allow our prophets to lead us astray. I love my Heavenly Father, I have reverence and respect for the leaders of our church and the gospel is true. I know the hate comments will come, but I won't deny what I know is true.
It's good to see that no one seems to have replied with hate! But (and I confess I haven't read many comments!) I am surprised that you refer to hate in itself. I presume there are comments suggesting that the members of the Quorum are not called by God and/or are deceived and therefore unwittingly deceiving.... How can you call that "hate"? The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, in asserting itself as the "only true church" implicitly disagrees with every other faith. And in Lesson 1 of Preach My Gospel, the missionaries teach that Joseph Smith was allegedly told by Jesus that of Christian churches "all their creeds are an abomination" - it stops there, but Smith's first vision account goes on to say "and all their professors corrupt" - not meaning teachers of course, but those who "profess" that Christianity. Could the LDS church not therefore stand accused of hatred themselves? No doubt the answer is that the Church is spreading its gospel in love... why is that not the case of other faiths?
amazing men lol these jerks call them selves prophets ouch! why not crown your self KING,President and Prophet narcissitic much. You know a liar like LDS leader when all they do is tell stories!
The General authorities all have a great sense of humor and they can make Me laugh every day. Even the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ has a great sense of humor other wise these people wouldn't have a clean of sense of humor. And I emphasize CLEAN!
You really should do some research, it is fairly common knowledge that ALL church remuneration packages compare poorly to any peer position, but even worse for the First Presidency and the Twelve who receive no more than a modest living allowance. Yes their living expenses are mostly covered by the Church but then they pretty much devote the rest of their lives in service with very little personal time. Besides MOST of these men were very successful in their personal life before being called.
This is a great church. No other church can set you on a path to exalted godhood. My wife and I are looking forward to having our own planet and raising billions of spirit children to send to our newly created Earth. WE can't wait to send our firstborn spirit son to our Earth to die for all our other kids sins. We will definitely name him Jesus. I will be answering billions of prayers when I am not busy with god mom. With billions of spirit kids to raise it will be a blessing to have all the faithful sisters who never married to work as our servants helping raise these newborn spirits. Let this true gospel march forward and fill the Earth...
Oh boy! General Conference starts tomorrow! :) The Gospel of Jesus Christ is a great strength to help us through the challenges of life. The Book of Mormon, Another Testament of Jesus Christ is a witness the our Savior lives. God, our Heavenly Father, loves all of His children on the face of this beautiful planet.
Sense of humor is good if it is used in a proper way and they are inspired and prompted by the spirit of the lord in contrast if it by some other way it is not of God but of the devil
I enjoy the light moments at General Conference. The joyful accounts of the Lord’s servants make them personable to me. Jesus Christ told us, “For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:30) A smile in the opening words of the Apostles and Prophet brings me right at home.
Come on! ye prosecutors! ye false swearers! All hell, boil over! Ye burning mountains, roll down your lava! for I will come out on the top at last. I have more to boast of than ever any man had. I am the only man that has ever been able to keep a whole church together since the days of Adam. A large majority of the whole have stood by me. Neither Paul, John, Peter, nor Jesus ever did it. I boast that no man ever did such a work as I. The followers of Jesus ran away from Him; but the Latter-day Saints never ran away from me yet . . . " (History of the Church, vol. 6, p. 408-409).
That was funny. You know what else is funny? Teen suicide. Opioid addiction. Broken families. Not allowing children of gay parents to be baptised. That one cracks me up!
everyone helps when it comes to disasters, tell me one simple answer honestly all you mormons, if the prophet is the voice of god for you to listen to, how many times has god been wrong ? if you want to include the plural wives thing thats okay. i have just one stipulation your answer must be a number not a reason why things change or that was someone else's idea. just answer this one simple question if the prophet is the voice of god, how many times has god been wrong
you do know that was a question just for mormons don't you? now you went and spoiled it for them not one of them could ever answer that question honestly, you should have waited to see what one would say thats what i wanted but its not the only paradox for them i will come up with another i know the bible is the only word of god and they are wrong, i guess another good one would be to never question their leader even when he is wrong its blind faith for them and they don't even realize it its masonic devil worship and some of them know it and they still go i just wanted to catch one in a lie i'm not mad at you for ruining it for me and i know god doesn't make mistakes he gives us trials to learn gives us sorrow to learn everything he does to us or for us is to learn how to live and be faithful i will never step foot into another mormon church not even for my mothers funeral i will do my best to try and open at least one mormons eyes to the truth what else can i do?
"And now, if there are faults they are the mistakes of men; wherefore, condemn not the things of God." -Introduction to the Book of Mormon That's quite the loaded question you ask. Prophets are men. Men make mistakes. Therefore, prophets are prone to make mistakes. The Bible is filled with them. You are cropping, framing, and stretching the question.
the book of mormon was recited to the scribe then repeated back to (the prophet) to make sure it was correct so accordingly the most perfect book in the world according to the first page of the book of mormon cannot be wrong yet there are over 4,000 corrections in it. now do you want to know why? i'm gonna tell you anyway since it was told to smith as a devine work that means he was getting his information from an angel of god (in your church's own words)there can be no mistakes but there are, whole paragraphs are corrected not a misspelling here or there whole paragraphs whole sentences that change the whole meaning of the verse to suit. and the worst part is not one of you will investigate the problem you every one of you say things like, well maybe god meant it to be like that or some other grasp at whatever straw just to hold onto a fading religion the court papers that prove the guy a fraud the women he slept with getting abortions all of the solid historical proof that it is a sham and you all still hold on to nothing
Richard Mcginnis You say, "Not one of you will investigate" implying you know the entirety of church members. Take it down a notch and get in touch with reality. There are in fact members of the church who know what they believe. I, for one, am very familiar with the changes to the Book of Mormon. Did Joseph Smith ever say it couldn't be edited for clarification? To my knowledge he did not. Dig through the Book all you want, but you won't find a single doctrinal change in the book, and you will consistently miss the message. The changes are minor, and I think the current version reads the smoothest. If you hurl daggers like, "Joseph Smith's wife's had abortions," or "Mormonism is Masonic devil-worshiping," then you are setting yourself up for failure. These unhistorical theories have been parroted over and over again. If you are so hell-bent on proving a *faith* wrong, then I suggest you find another pass-time.
first joseph smith was the one who said it was the most perfect book , yet your leaders "fix" it according to their whim,as for taking it down a notch i was a mormon from 1972 to 1998 and i have seen the changes i refused to go on a mission and preach a book or faith that evidently was a compilation of 6 or 7 other books new at the time and as new as they were nobody was reading them then there's the court documents and don't waste my time saying they don't exist because they do there is his mothers journal that says him and his father planned it all and took turns coming up with the book for money and sarah pratt she was golden until she wouldn't screw him, and by the way he wasn't martyred he was killed because some of the wives of the other men he was screwing found out and went after him that is also court record, along with the fact that when they came to kill him he shot thru the door and killed two of them and wounded another then because he was so interested in getting away he left his brother bleeding on the floor and jumped out a window, i did do my research and i did quit when i found the truth so don't try to school me on mormonism cause i been there and done that and when i did they tried to get my mother and sisters to stop talking to me.let me know when you wake up or better yet why don't you go and read an 1830 version of the book and a new version then come back and talk to me but you won't you'll just come up with some other excuse like the one above( joseph smith never said it couldn't be corrected)
You know what's hilarious, now that DNA has proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that the entire premise of the BOM is a fairy tale, and yet people still sit there and swallow this. Now that is completely hilarious!!!
What is hilarious is that you are too stupid to realize that a group of 50 people integrating with native cultures wouldn't leave any Hebrew DNA. It would be gone in about 3 generations. Go get an education.
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How sad this man follows a false gospel and will be cursed based on Galatian 1:8-9 for all eternity. What a great testimony for him to become a Christian and reveal the truth that Moroni 8:18 even shows that God is unchangeable and not a progressing God as LDS claims.
Ucthdorf = We as Momons do blah blah blah blah blah blah etc etc etc . Well how about preaching and studying and learning the words of Christ you dumb ass
+999LDS Don't you know that when we go to church every sunday or watch to general conference, or study in seminary or institutes, or watch firesides, trainings, we are not studying and learning and preaching the words of Christ?!
+999LDS Let us oft speak kind words to each other. Such a handsome face to hold such a terrible burden of hatred and prejudice. Let's just agree to disagree. You don't believe in the church. We do. It doesn't hurt you. Instead of spending so much time on bagging on a religion, why don't you spend that time making a portfolio? Cuz you should totally be a model, you handsome devil! (no pun intended)
Lol Sherry . My point was rather extreme but when Mormons decide to preach Christ rather than make people listen to the voice of men and their self opinionated remarks and feelings maybe we will get somewhere . How about " Christ said " rather than" I said "
+999LDS I just realized why I thought you were so hot! It's a picture of the dude from Supernatural! Tricksey hobbitses, with their fake pictures. I totally just flirted with Dean Winchester. As penance for your trickery, you must go 24 hours saying nothing but good things about the lds church. I'll start with an example. "There's this funny Mormon girl named Sherry, on RU-vid. She made me smile."
Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you. Matthew 7:6
