@@NightmareBlade10 Well yeah, they do it as a joke. Because the guy knows shit and is wrong all the time. Everyone knows that, except Gideon of course, the old codger.
Everyone talking about the girls, but no one talking about how Gideon sending you to meet a lightning dragon so she kills you fits his character perfectly.
EXACTLY, she and Nephelli are legitimately the 2 contenders for "best girl" of Elden Ring as the only 2 women that aren't manipulative bitches and happen to help the tarnished while remaining decent people throughout the entire game Edit: Poor milicent becomes a puddle lmao
Sellen is the best woman in the game and nobody can say otherwise. She is willing to teach sorceries even if you are dumb as a mule. Does not make a big deal that she is actually imprisoned by Carian black-ops, just asks if you could help her escape. Acknowledges that as a pupil you might have other interests than to research primeval current and respects your choices. Calls you her darling pupil. Has actual sense of humour, cracks jokes and has fun personality compared to Roderika, Melina and Nepheli. Will always offer you place in her academy even should you fail to become Elden Lord. Asks you to become her teacher, should you become Elden Lord. And in cut content she calls out Mohg/Varre for trying to manipulate you.
I like how Gideon considers Rya a poor option because she's a fucking snake, but has absolutely no complaints about Ranni being an incredibly withered doll...
@@Brandonious15987It is stated that she took the form of a human to commune with the knights as a priestess of the ancient dragon cult, so the dragussy is real.
@Captain_Morgan IDK about that. If the rot will turn people into Malenia, shouldn't the Kindred of Rot and Cleanrot Knights have more likeness towards Malenia? There is big emphasis in Millicent's quest on the fact they are sisters, meaning their affliction of the rot is self contained. My best guess is that the Aeonia Bloom is taking Malenia's genetics to produce the sisters. Malenia is thought to have only bloomed a few times, once during the fight with Radahn, during the fight with The Tarnished, and once more right outside her boss fight. That bloom is also the same location you find the Traveler's set (Millicent's outfit). So my headcannon is that the outer god that is inflicting Malenia with the rot is trying to use the Aeonia Bloom to spread into the lands between, and the sisters are basically pollen spreading a stronger version of the rot. That's why Millicent would rather take out the needle and die, than to turn into another Aeonia Bloom. That's also why Gowry (who is secretly a Kindred of Rot insect person) will help repair the needle for Millicent, but be upset when she takes it out, saying "You were so close. So very close. To becoming the fairest of all flowers. Would you disown us too? As your Mother did? We children of the scarlet rot?"
3:24 "Seduce a dragon" Sadly the tarnished failed in his d20 DnD dice roll and the fact he ain't a bard just landed him a visit with the gods of Elden ring for a brief moment
Dm: your persuasion check fails, you enter combat with the dragon. Roll to hit... that hits... roll for damage... you take 276 points of lightning damage because lmao
You know what, Ofnir? Some people are into being pegged by a strong warrior woman, and we all know how things went last time you tried to stop the Tarnished.
Millicent seems like a great option. You save her from the brink of death, help her fight again, and she eventually finds herself in the end. She's one of the only characters who doesn't hide anything from you, or treats you as a means to an end. She comes off as genuine and wants to help you and much as youve helped her. Yes, the rot would be an issue, but as long as she would keep in the needle, I assume you're safe. And even if that's not the case, preserving boluses do the trick well enough.
Being related to Malenia though means that any sort of copulation you attempt better be followed up with several preserving boluses because you are likely to die either in the middle of the act or from a complication from having your spear rot and fall off entirely. Which is to say every time will require protection
theses kind of videos make me wish so hard for a " elden ring true rpg edition " mod that allow you to strike engaging conversations with the npc depending on your choices deepening your relationship with them and possibly altering their fate, new vegas style the fact said conversations could go from almost canon lore friendly to meme worthy depending on the tone of said mod is just icing of the cake for me
Pretty sure Roderika is one of the few soulsbornering characters that isnt some secret monster or evil doer. She is genuinely a helpful, naive, caring and also pretty. She is talented as spirit tuning. She shows concern for Hewg, which basically none of the Tarnished seem to give a fuck about him. She warns you of danger from the dung eater.
@@claynicholas4594 Unironically, just type "Human Lansseax" and open Google Images LOL Most are Reddit posts of people trying to recreate Lansseax's human face. Based on what I don't know, dunno if any items/spels/shit describe her face, but if that's even close to her human form, damn does she look good Yeah, not that reliable of a sauce, but a sauce nonetheless LOL
Get you out of his way so he can have MARIKA. Marika is basically our destined wife, and Gideon is sour about it so he spends the whole game trying to get us killed and out of the way, but we just keep casually killing gods and only further solidifying our claim to Marika’s bed.
Millicent was always my favorite of the female NPC’s you meet. The journey you both go on is genuinely awesome and she also helps you with some bosses.
"After Gideon gave his wisdom on Tarnished harem choices, the Tarnished then decided to became Elden Lord and go for the Frenzy Flame ending. Problem solved".
Bro’s legit a homie, he didnt really insult you, he just consulted you on your tastes in women, gave sine words of advice, then said bye, sigma right there.
It's incredible to see what post-nut clarity does to a man. Also, the fact that he sees a dragon as a good option leads me to theorise that he is a scalie, wich is some DEEP LORE.
@@epicebones7329 Well yes, but not only aren't we able to see it but I also think she can only give us the true "electrifying experience" while being a dragon.
considering Marika managed to clone, bang and impregnate herself, I am inclined to believe, that Ranni is perfectly capable of creating a new body for herself, once we make her the new god or whatever
3:00 "Now if you're into that, then so be it, but just know that everyone is judging you, inclusing Boc" That has to be the funniest thing I have ever heard. XD
This is legit. I love how he goes through the list, and at the end recommends the absolute worst decision you can make, just to test if you were stupid enough to take it.
@@REvoLverj98After many hours reading Vyke's book on How to lay your Dragon. The brave Tarnished ventures forth. To confront the object of their... beastly desires as They try to seduce the Dragoness.
step 1: tell Hyetta the 'grapes' are eyes the moment you meet her and your not feeding them to her step 2: tell her you know where the two fingers are you'd be happy to bring her to them step 3: she becomes a normal maiden and you can bed her
@@Sir_Fres The whole point of being a maiden is to guide you the Tarnished to become a "Lord" and usher a new age/order. By turning ruins to stength. Easy you're urges and finally graduating from the Waifu Academy and becoming you're eternal consort.
Roderika was, is, and likely will always be best girl. Look, Roderika is, like Rya, a soft soul, with a gentle voice, like Millicent, someone who initially was weak, but took into her hands a way to rise past her weakness after receiving help from the tarnished, like Nepheli, has never manipulated the tarnished nor has any plans to, and in fact even helps the tarnished, like Ranni, has some ties to nobility (she is first seen wearing the Crimson Hood, which is part of the noble set), and most importantly, is also a tarnished. And the huge bonus? just LOOK at her! Cute as a button and pretty to boot!
How does rya not manipulate you? She uses your good will to help what you think to be a helpless women to take you down the path of a murderous blasphemy cult.
UM, actually, in my honest opinion, I am inclined to strongly believe that Alexander is the better choice compared to all the other mentioned. Not only is he a great friend throughout the whole journey, but you actually partake in multiple pushing actions, one in which you even neatly lube him. On one occasion, he even powered himself up with other fighters parts, which let's you assume some strong women were part of the loot. Which further lets me believe, there's a chance of a top quality crack in the pot, if you know what I mean. He's also heat and cold resistant, therefore being a great choice all year around. He can also handle GIANT things, so high level tarnished have no problem fitting. Lastly, he can spar with you so you never get rusty, helping you stay in top shape for whatever dangers you may face. In conclusion, Alexander is the best and ONLY option, therefore everyone else is IRRELEVANT.
I can argue that Master Hewg could be an option too, he smiths all your weapons, allows you to duplicate ashes of war and you can sell him the random items you get. Still no match for Alexander though
He's standing at the place where he introduces himself when you first reach the roundtable. So just imagine he's saying all this before the Tarnished has even met half the people he's going on about.
Black Knife Tiche is the one true option. Nine feet tall, literally killed a god, protects you in battle, always there for you, and can shoot fire. Either her or Lady Tanith.
He forgot about Millicent, I know, I friendzoned her too, but come on, this is just cruel. Then again she is dead... Ah, whatever, I'll always have the Albinauric Woman by my side.
bruh, she has cancerous leprosy. you stick your dick in that its falling off. she a living fragment of the god of STD's at that point you should keep her in the 'look dont touch' category
There are honestly enough girls to make a part two to this, and I hope you do. Roderika, Hyetta, Latenna, Tyche, Tanith (though I guess she is taken already), probably more I am forgetting...
you forgot Hyetta, the second most-wholesome girl in the land (if you forget about the weird diet she's on), And Milicent, which has the huge-bonus of looking like Malenia without being the Blade of Miquella
Buddy, i hate to break it to you but Hyetta is a corpse possessed by a lovecraftian entity. It'd be a much better option to simply save Irina before she dies.
Sellen is quite underrated, and that's maybe because many people don't know how she looks under that mask. Hell, why would they make her so pretty and then slap that yee-yee ass stone helmet on her face? Yes, she made meatballs out of wizards and has a friend in a dude who makes dolls and keeps them in his love basement, but that doesn't change my opinion even a bit.
As with everything, it's for lore reasons. There are different schools in the Acedmy focused on different fields of magic, with the crowns being given to scholars who made major contributions to their specific school. The crowns are modeled after the founder of that school, so having her wearing that crown shows she's a part of some school that doesn't seem to be part of the academy anymore, but also, but the fact that she's the only one to have a Witch's crown, plus it's description, show shes the one who founded the Witch's school of sorcery. She wears it because it's a sign of the pride she has in herself. "SHES the smart one here, NOT the academy, they are just fools for kicking her out like they did. But even if they kicked her out, she's going to proudly carry on her research no matter what!" and all that.
Holy shit, this really is a gem, and I do mean it! The almost pitch perfect Gideon impression, spot-on jokes and delivery make this video unexpectedly hilarious, keep it up man 👍
If this is pitch perfect I'm the king of Spain. Come on, they are not even particularly close. It suffices for the joke, but if it was a genuine attempt at imitation it's terrible.
I love how there's just a bit more emphasis and clarity when he's advising you to seduce a dragon, like he really wants you to listen in on his solution to your problems, this is important.
So... despite all the facts you've brought to the table Gideon, I still see Rya as a good choice. But I'll try to try my luck with lansseax as you said Gideon, she looks like a sweet and electrifying girl
*THE MAMMARY MARKET* OH MY GOD THAT’S THE FUNNIEST TIT JOKE IVE EVER ENCOUNTERED 0:37 this timestamp should be self explanatory XD 4 arm technique for Ranni omg “Don’t be a fucking simp” damn this is the best example so far of this almost 4th wall breaking interaction with Gideon XD Nevermind, he just said “protect the bean” about Rya :D 2:31 Ok… Gideon actually broke the 4th wall here
