How were you disciplined as a child? "The Real" ladies share their experiences during the Girl Chat. Watch to find out who got spankings, time outs and the good-ol' chancleta.
Gotta love Mama Mai. When children are naughty I swear my mom pinches them on their hands and then they go 'ow' and then their parents look and my mom's like la la la 😂😂😂
Michael Lovely I got the extension cord threats-never actually acted out so much that my mom ended up getting me with it. I usually got myself together before she took it that far lmao. My oldest brother on the other hand never seemed to learn 🤦🏾♀️
Buttered Bread that's called bullying if someone doesnt hit you first. if they do, it's called self defense. but please, explain to the police why hitting defenseless children that pose no harm to you is ok. the weird thing is the law is discriminatory against kids for this. if i hit you, i could be brought up on charges of assault and battery. if you hit a kid, it's ok. it's messed up.
I agree that there is no "one-size-fits-all" form of discipline. However, EVERY child needs discipline in general. Too many kids these days are not getting discipline and it shows when they get older.
Actually literally all the research shows that spanking doesn’t work as a form of discipline. There might not be a one-size-fits-all form of discipline but hitting is definitely a one-size-fits-none method.
Honestly, I am against whoopings! However, a child that is disrespectful, disobedient, talks back, acting up in school deserves to get a spanking because that is not the way to behave or act. But beating the holy hell out of them for every single thing they do or when you get mad is just too damn much. There is a difference between discipline and abuse. If you are beating your child because you had a bad day at work, or because you are mad or because they made one bad grade or spilled a drink on accident, that's wrong and abuse-like and you will pay for that! Kids know when you are whooping them for a legitimate reason or just to release frustration and alot of parents do that! Your kids will end up hating you and cutting you out of their life and it will be your own fault!
Thats the thing, kids that DONT get an ass whoop or dont get disciplined correctly are the ones who turn out like shitty brats. I agree with you on not disciplining them for every small thing but some things just dont get fixed with a "time out" or talking. I remember i saw this little girl at a restaurant spit and throw the plate of food to her mom because she didnt get crayons and the mother didnt do anything. Those are the parents that raise shitty kids. A spanking is called for once in a while when a child acts up like that
Taneshae Davis See to me if your child is acting out that badly there were issues there for a long time and stress is happening in the home. Tantrums for 2-4 year olds I get, any older and they're acting out because their environment is a mess.
there is a fine line between abuse and beating a child until a coma. Those that cross that line definitely are wrong but as a 24 yo looking back I got hit a handful of times until I was at an age that I could understand the things I was doing and I thank my parents for doing so.
+Joanna Pyzik I agree with u to a certain extent. But when I was a little girl, there was no such thing as the terrible twos and the tantrums during those toddler ages. My mother made sure that I didn't act out she trained to know that although I was a child, that didn't give me the green pass to get away with anything. If I was to at up in a store or anywhere, I'm telling you once I got home it was going down. Other kids my age would be acting up, I was like 1-4, the parents of the kids would ask my mom how is ur child sooo behaved. My mom told them it's because she disciplined me to not act up or else I was gonna get a beat down. Now that I'm older I'm grateful for it all, cuz the children these days, half of the stuff they do I wouldn't dare do.
joy and grace I now. She's so neglected at The Real. She's The View material. She's funny, open-minded, well spoken, she knows how to listen and how to respect other people's opinions.
What do you mean neglected? She talks ALL the time and has her own segments and everything. I swear you commenters are like sheep. Last year it was strictly Tamar hate and mostly Tamera love and now you've turned against Tamera and are jumping on Jeannie's balls. She's not a victim. Her opinion is very respected by the other hosts. You all are doing the most
THE HAIR BRUSH LMAO I remember vividly getting smacked with it because I wasn't staying still when mom was doing my hair for school. By the time she was done my hairstyle would be so tight it felt like a face liffffffttt 😥🏃🏻♀️
Samantha Derrick As someone who doesn't give a fu*k, kiss my black a**. What's disgusting is you reading a comment out of context and thinking it is ok to talk to someone the way you did. No one asked you for the history of makeup and style. It's not that deep sweetheart. You are obviously bored and decided to troll. Well, you got the right one. IT WAS A COMPLIMENT!! When I said "this episode" I meant ESPECIALLY this episode. Don't be a Petty Betty. It's not cute. Currently, 23 other people UNDERSTOOD what I meant and agreed so...✌(feel free to subtract a finger). I'm so sorry the RU-vid comment section does not let us post in big colorful letters and pictures to help those at your level of comprehension understand. You asked who the fu*k I am...well there you go...now GET CHO LIFE!!
"I didn't get spanked, I got whooped." Girl yes Tamera! That is one of the reasons why I revere my parents now lol. I think every child is different when it comes to discipline. Parents just need to make sure their child learns from their mistakes. Some parents spank their kids but they don't teach them, and that causes their child to act out again.
Literally all the research shows that spanking doesn’t work as a form of discipline. I’m guessing you as an adult have far more issues than you admit. Being beaten isn’t an accomplishment it’s just sad.
Shakira Ande yea I see what you mean. I don’t have kids so I don’t know but with my older sister haha 🤣🤣👏🏾👏🏾it definitely took a village. She was something else I guess it depends on the kid and the parent??
My mom was like a black ninja ...... I didn't see her ass coming .... like a bat outta hell ... I don't even know how I ended up on the floor all those damn times 🤔
I was hit it as a child and i refuse to do that to my children. It instilled fear in me and I don’t want my children to be terrified of me when then do something bad. I want to talk it through and be reasonable
__Panda__ RIGHT. Same. My mother never spanked me and I had and have much more respect for her than I do my father who ONLY used corporal punishment. If you terrify your children into obedience, they'll just learn how to HIDE and lie their mistakes to avoid pain.
I read in a psychology blog that if you spank your child, it conditions them to direct the anger to themselves because they cant hate you because you're the parent. So instead the anger and the hate is turned to themself 🙁
The thing is with Tamera, she coddles Aden so much he’s used to getting his own way. My aunty goes through this exact thing with her toddler where he hits back because she just gives him what he wants whenever he has a tantrum. It’s called being spoilt. You need to set boundaries first. Discipline starts with the word “NO” if you can’t tell your child no, then don’t even bother hitting them. It’s useless
Do you know her personally? No you don't!! So you can't say that she cuddles her kids too much. Because you don't her parenting skills or what she does off camera idiot
If anything, Jeannie should talk with Tamera about letting Mama Mai give her disciplinary tips because of the way she disciplined that bratty kid in the grocery store.
If she was spoiling her child she wouldn’t have said it on a daytime show...children will always be children no matter how perfect of a parent you think you are... N Parenting has no set rules to go by... we all try what we know n what we think will be good for our children. @negativepeeps.
@Kayte Larsen my brothers and I got spanked but we never hit our parents. So, not every kid responds like that. There's also a right way to spank and learn the power of just the look to discipline.
Haha, thanks for sharing. My parents are from the Yoruba tribe, Nigeria and I was disciplined with the wooden spoon growing up. I don't remember it having an actual name other than "wooden spoon," but I'll ask and then get back to you if it does.
Tamera, please stay seated with that damn dissertation. "Aden, if you don't stop hitting and screaming at Mommy, I'm going to no longer give you the attention you so fervently desire until you know how to calm yourself down and play nice so that way I can speak to you again without your unnecessary antics. If you don't cease this disruptive behavior, I will ignore you and you will have to play by yourself until I feel you have earned the right to have Mommy play with you. Mommy doesn't appreciate nor will she tolerate these outbursts of inappropriate shenanigans."
Candy Flores you'd be surprised. I'm a first time mom and bending down to my daughter's eye level and explaining, or taking a fav toy away works better than spanking her. And I got beat as child..."go outside and get a switch" my dad would always tell us.
It’s weird hearing some people talking about getting “whipped” when it lowkey sounds like the parent was just beating them up 😞😞 the line is so thin between discipline and abuse
I used to love Tamera but if you can't realize she's a hypocrite you're delusional. She is so judgmental and always criticizing other people's parenting techniques. For instance earlier in the year she was telling Tamar that logan was a reflection of her and then went on to talking about Adrienne whose only the step-mom to Israels children should be able to discipline them. Yet in a situation that had nothing to do her she can't imagine someone else touching her own kids! Like I said in my own post, Aaiden is a reflection of what's being taught in his household. But no, innocent Tamera can't even own up to the fact that her children are acting out because of the LACK of discipline, just like she tried to throw on Tamar in the past. Tamera doesn't even realize that it's all about teaching her children respect and like Jeannie said in her own words, It takes a village! I don't see how Tamera can preach about being so biblical but turns a blind eye to "spare the rod, spoil the child." Please, she better wish she had someone like Mama Mai to love on yet discipline when needed. Soft ass 2 kids is in for a RUDE awakening as her kids grow older. They all looked at her like bitch please.
Jazmyn oh wow do you have any kids? I have one child and I dare for anybody to touch my child no joke and it is different for others to speak about what they will do when they don't have kids! Hitting a 3 year old they are babies they don't know better and by them not knowing it tells them self consciousl like Tamera said to hit because you hit them when your mad.
Jazmyn Right, our kids are a reflection of us I agree alot with your statement but she obvious doesn't realize what she said way back then. But I agree with Jeannie's mom too, that darn kid was about 8 like Jeannie said and that's a crime shame for any child to get like that.
uniqueunique28 listen honey, I'm one of 7 and for her child to be misbehaving THAT WAY, clearly the parent wasn't teaching discipline in the home. There's no excuse for it! It's called being a brat and like JEANNIE SAID, it takes a village! Tamera is a hypocrite! she was the first one to talk about how she thinks Adrienne would be amazing and should be allowed to discipline Israel's kids.....but when it comes to her own? please. Between her reality show and The Real , Tamera has def shown us all how contradicting she truly is.
Mama Mai ladies and gentlemen lmaoooo 'You put back or I attack' 😂😂😂 But Tamera Aiden be kicking your ass. Talking about touch my child and I touch you. Sometimes parents need a little outside help. For some reason kids tend to listen to strangers discipline more.
It is very common in India for strangers to admonish a child which is not their own, not getting physical of course but it helps, the parents and it gets the child's immediate attention. People will help to distract the child so they forget what they were crying about.
true it tends to happen to adults in a way the 3rd party listener. Because they feel such a comfort to misbehave with someone they know than it is with someone they don't. So I agree on that with you.
When Tamara was talkihow Aiden was learning that he can spank when he's disappointed or not getting what he wants, I'm reminded of violent men abusing women. I am so glad that Tamara changed her approach and learned what works for him. That way, the old thinking with spanking doesn't escalate and continue on into adulthood.
I rolled my eyes at my mother when I was 11,and she yanked me out of the car (we were on our way to church), and she whacked me with the belt, so hard, had a bruise the size of my fist on my thigh for weeks. Never rolled my eyes at her again and I'm 22
Her mom is Caribbean!! We do not tolerate rude children! Period. Children speak when spoken to and don't you dare embarrass me in public it will be your last day on earth. Respect for your elders is a rule out of the womb.
Children need guidance rules and to be trained how to act! Yes trained!! You can take forever with time out if you want but a good beating is a one lesson class a child will never forget! After that it's the "Look" to remind you of that one time cut ass that u should never forget!
I think with the situation that Jennie was speaking about, what the mother did was appropriate. If the child is screaming and hitting their parent, there needs to be an intervention. Wouldn’t be my child because I wouldn’t tolerate that behavior, but sometimes parents need help.
I have never hit either of my parents. Nor have I ever said "I hate you" to them. I was never hit or spanked as a child. I was the kind of kid Jeannie was talking about, where if i had hurt my parents feelings I would be really upset.
Let's be honest, you can whoop a child or not whoop one, you just don't know how they are going to turn out! You can raise them, teach them and guide them but they will make their own decisions and do what they think works for them. All we can do is pray that what we have taught them stays with them and they do the right thing.
MrS98VAC I agree with you. If a child is disrespectful, disobediant, talks back and cuts up in school, he deserves a good spanking because those qualities are horrible to have out in the real world and they need to learn the hard way that is unacceptable. I just don't like these parents beating the holy hell out of these children for every damn thing they do. It could be as small as accidentally wasting water or one bad grade at school. Kids need discipline not abuse!!
Speaking didn't do nothing but make me depressed and suicidal back in my day , now I don't have a relationship with my family , cause all they did was beat me when they were angry. I'm good tho.
Yeah, this video is lighthearted for some, but I had to stop and think about the people who have been hardcore abused and how they feel about laughing and joking about corporal punishment.
Disciplining a child is different than hitting when ever someone's upset. Kids should be spank but not for everything. Also you do it calm not angry..explaining why.
Cray May I'm gonna explain something because I feel like I should speak on this as someone who grew up in a African family. Yes they are the fun sides and the bad sides. And I'm sure many of my African sis grew up with siblings. Well I didn't. And I'm still an only child today. I used to have a few friends when I was around 8-9-10 whom I would play with. When I got 16-17, I started to feel alone. My parents didn't make it easy for me. They were constantly expecting me to excell at pretty much everything I do. The more they put pressure on me, the more I failed at everything. That made my dad very pissed. So he used the spanking tactic, all the time. I had serious troubles in math and he couldn't accept the fact that I wasn't a pro at math like him so he would made me stay up till midnight almost every weeknight so he could show me "his method" while I learned "the teacher method", the one I was supposed to use the day of the exam. I can still remember the insults he throw at me, made fun of me by saying "I'm gonna be worthless" while I was doing everything I can. At every exam, my brain went blank & I got scared everytime. Why? Because when I got home, he would ask "How did that exam go". That was pretty much my teens years. Being scared of my own dad. While my mom stood there, didn't really do anything. The worst thing was that I didn't talk to anybody at that time. I started seeing a counselor in March 2014, the same year, I called the police on my dad because I couldn't take it anymore, he went too far. A few months later, I left the house. I went to two different shelters for about 10 months. I didn't contact my parents at all. I experienced all kind of things there. Discrimination, feeling disrespected by my ex who couldn't handle the word "NO". During these 10 months, I saw my parents were trying to reach me. I finally gave up and my mom sent me a text in December 2015. Now today, one year later, I'm just happy to have my parents back. They've changed for the better & so did I. Now, I won't say that spanking doesn't work but being overcontrolling can lead to what I did or even worse. Like Tamera said, every child is different. Now my only problem is, I don't know how to feel about men today. All I want from you girls (and boys) is advices. Not judgment (AFRICAN FAM, I'M TALKING TO YOU). I still can't believe I wrote all of this but I felt like I had to. Thanks for taking time to read this ❤
I'm African (Motswana & Malawian) but I never got spanked. My parents only told me not to do it again. They taught me what's good and bad. I turned out pretty okay. My parents think it's bad to beat children and expect the child to understand what they did wrong. Just talk to them.
I love Loni's hair! I got whoopin's when I was a kid. I rarely have to whoop my kids...I talk to them more, explain why they can't do XYZ and it works.
I love how ya'll were so REAL in this. People are afraid to say how they really discipline their kids cause everyone is an expert now...even people with no kids. Every child is different and like Tam said...it is up to the parent to figure out what works best for them and their kid. The only negative I have is for people who don't discipline at all. Later, society has to put up with what you wouldn't even attempt to correct.
In my African household, we had to fetch our own stick/branch and it had to be the length of your body...I wonder why I never just avoided the discipline, we just took it cause we knew what we did wrong lmao
😂😂😂😂omg i remember this. My dad had me fetch a branch from outside one time then i gave it to him and he put salt and pepper on it and gave me the “ look” while sprinkling it on the branch, then beat my ass!!! Africans dont play! 😂😂😂😂😂
Kids do respond differently. My sister got the chancleta the most, I just watched her get them and thought "Let me not do whatever she just did". Her being the example worked great for me.
"You put back or I attack!" Love it!!! When my kids were very small at the first bad behaviors and ignoring my verbal reprimands, i would place their hand palm down on mine palm up at my fingertips and smack the palm of my hand. I didn't even graze their fingers but it was startling enough that after the first 2-3 times "the look" was usually all it took although sometimes saying the name in "the mom means business tone" was needed
Right? I got beaten as a kid and I'm on antidepressants now. And yes being beaten and spanked is the same thing. People wanna act like it is different but at the end of the day they were all beaten in very similar ways so it doesn't really matter what word you use. IF you turned out fine you wouldn't use violence as a way to discipline.
@@MsDudette21 I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling frfr. But maybe that's the result of something else that happened in your life not just spanking?
@@MsDudette21 I think your History was different I don't nkow what kind of spanking you had but seams like was a Daily thing. I definitely get spank but when my mother is not really happy with me, now I'm a Mother and I get her Actions, I want to nkow if you are a Mother now. Because I use to think the same, I think your History was an Abusive one, even I nkow Spank is a Phisycal abused I mean it more once in a while, I want to nkow how Often has happened to you, because for you to End up Depressed? I believe there is something Deeper than what you are saying to us.
I know the pain! My mom would make me stay on my knees for 1 hour straight facing the wall. Sometimes, she would make my sister lift one leg and balance books on both hands. DAMN spanking didn't work all the time.
Tam sounds like one of those moms in the store when her kid acting up she bend down say "now Aiden didn't we talk about this in the car now stop throwing bars of soap at people" 😂😂😂😂
I love Jeanie’s mom! Sometimes those parents with out of control, really need some backup. If there is one thing I learned from being a mother, is it takes a village to raise a child. I have never seen a child trying to hit their mother. The Caribbean American community I grew up in, back in the day would tear you up, even if just verbally. Your friends would no longer be allowed to speak to you much less play with you. You would be marked as one of those “bad” kids, if your parents caught you talking to them you would be in trouble. I have never ever thought of hitting my parents, so I don’t know what would happen. I ‘m pretty sure it would be my last thought.
I'm gonna explain something because I feel like I should speak on this as someone who grew up in a African family. Yes they are the fun sides and the bad sides. And I'm sure many of my African sis grew up with siblings. Well I didn't. And I'm still an only child today. I used to have a few friends when I was around 8-9-10 whom I would play with. When I got 16-17, I started to feel alone. My parents didn't make it easy for me. They were constantly expecting me to excell at pretty much everything I do. The more they put pressure on me, the more I failed at everything. That made my dad very pissed. So he used the spanking tactic, all the time. I had serious troubles in math and he couldn't accept the fact that I wasn't a pro at math like him so he would made me stay up till midnight almost every weeknight so he could show me "his method" while I learned "the teacher method", the one I was supposed to use the day of the exam. I can still remember the insults he throw at me, made fun of me by saying "I'm gonna be worthless" while I was doing everything I can. At every exam, my brain went blank & I got scared everytime. Why? Because when I got home, he would ask "How did that exam go". That was pretty much my teens years. Being scared of my own dad. While my mom stood there, didn't really do anything. The worst thing was that I didn't talk to anybody at that time. I started seeing a counselor in March 2014, the same year, I called the police on my dad because I couldn't take it anymore, he went too far. A few months later, I left the house. I went to two different shelters for about 10 months. I didn't contact my parents at all. I experienced all kind of things there. Discrimination, feeling disrespected by my ex who couldn't handle the word "NO". During these 10 months, I saw my parents were trying to reach me. I finally gave up and my mom sent me a text in December 2015. Now today, one year later, I'm just happy to have my parents back. They've changed for the better & so did I. Now, I won't say that spanking doesn't work but being overcontrolling can lead to what I did or even worse. Like Tamera said, every child is different. Now my only problem is, I don't know how to feel about men today. All I want from you girls (and boys) is advices. Not judgment (AFRICAN FAM, I'M TALKING TO YOU). I still can't believe I wrote all of this but I felt like I had to. Thanks for taking time to read this ❤
Muriel Melly I'm so sorry for what happened to you. I can relate. I come from a hispanic family. Raced by my aunt, who was abusive, physical and mentally. I was very afraid to do the same to my kids. Today I have two daughters that are everything to me and my husband. I spank them rarely, but necessarily. They get time out and understand this means "stay along to think why you did this" the same minutes as their age and if is hitting each other, time out is facing the wall. I tell you all this because although I understand your point, discipline is not the same as abuse, keep it in mind. Telling a child he will be worthless, It's NEVER ok! Your dad crossed the line just like my aunt. Also, now that I read about the HW I'm happy that this days, teachers send home explanations for parents with the method to use to help our kids with homeworks. You will be ok, just remember not to over do it because of your pass experience. I was about to make that mistake until I realized I was overprotective of my child. Oh and my husband don't spank them ever, we have an agreement because after my brother hit me so much until I was 16, you can imagine all the fears I faced for a loOoong time with my first relationship. Blessings and a big hug❤️
Wow girl your dad and teenage experience sounds JUST like mine. My dad also wanted me to be an overachiever and was very, very abusive. I think after a kid hits a certain age, you need to ease up a little. It is embarassing for a father to be beating on his 16 year old daughter because she did not get a good grade or she looked at him wrong, this is when it becomes abuse and is clearly no longer about discipline. I also did not talk to my dad for 2 years one I got to college, he had been that brutal toward me and nobody in my family even blamed me. A child loves their parents unconditionally for the most part, I still love my dad and I'm sure you love yours more than the world too, they do not want to upset them but once the child is almost grown and still being treated like a 2 year old, it is simply not healthy. Please be strong and have faith as you are so young and have your whole life ahead of you still. As for your ex, IGNORE HIM!!! He is not worthy of you.. you were going through a hard time and chose him to comfort you through that. When we are vulnerable like that (not talking to parents, etc.), we make very bad choices just to feel some comfort/love. Just ignore the whole world and focus on your goals and building good habits which are all about achieving your goals. You can do this sister!!!!!
Muriel Melly I'm African too and I feel like I can relate. I believe that growing up me and my other 3 sisters were indeed abused by our father. I am 20 now and I feel traumatized and I have all resentment toward him that kept growinf with me ever since I was a kid. He would always beat us for the smallest and dumbest stuff and I now noticed that this normally happened when he came home from work so I think he used spanking us as a way to relieve his stresses which is terrible because you are a grown man father, why make punching bags out of the people you are supposed to love. Not only did he normally beat us when he came back from work but he always did it when my Mom wasn't around even one day I was about to get beat by him and my Mom came home and he put the belt down and just told me to go which is weird and I look back on and realize somethings not right. For years I kept trying to convince myself that I'm just like other people who get spankings from their parents and I should get over it. As I get older I realize now this is deeper than discipline, this man abuse me and my sisters and I am still dealing with the mental and emotional damage and I can't let the pain go. I can't get over it. It hurts, even after all these years, it hurts. I have memories of my childhood and all I see is living in fear because every little thing would set him off and he would start beating us. I still live with my parents and I have no personal connection to them what so ever. Its like their just managers of a hotel I'm staying in. Once I move out I doubt I'll ever speak to my father again. Sad to say but its the truth, I don't love him and I don't care about his life. I know these feelings are toxic and unhealthy to keep harboring and I really want to get therapy but I don't even know where to start.
I can relate to you, we got electric cord, flip flop, stick and what not. This was done by my mum, she was raising us by herself so it was stressful for her sometimes and she just pours out her anger on us. She threatens us sometimes to go dump us with my dad, knowing how that will upset us. Most of her 'discipline moments' weren't actually discipline but anger and frustration from being a single mum. My sister and I will always plan our escape but didn't have the guts to carry it through. Till date I can't disclose some things a daughter should disclose to her mother and she wonders why.
Luna Azul Thank you. Now that I'm with my mom I feel so much better. However, around December, I always act weird (2011) and this time, I've decided to read the Bibile and it calms me a lot. Long story short, my dad is somehow always travelling to Africa during the Holidays and he's been doing this since 2011. The one year that he stayed (2 years ag0) he was hella controlling overnonsense. I turned 18 yet was still treated like I was 11. I remember my cousin (from my dad's side) she came from France to study in Canada (still there after 2 years) my dad was literally praising her & she kept gave me up and down subtle looks. Now, when I came back, she got so surprised that I could survived 10 months without any of my parents. Something she'd never be capable of. I love my dad. The 2016 one though
It says a lot when a child is spanked and they decide to hit the parent back! Not in my yawd!!! Discipline isn't just the spanking itself, it has more to do with how a child is trained on a daily.
LOL Agreed! I think she was using it wrong. Tamera was probably visibly upset or crying when she spanked Aden. Spanking is not supposed to be out of emotion. It's supposed to set boundaries for a child so next time the child thinks about doing it, they remember the spanking and don't. Plus, that boy is probably hyper active and really wants attention from his mother seeing that she's not there consistently due to work. She just has to figure out how to adequately be there for him.
I call b******* it honestly just depends on the child I would never ever in a million years put my hands on my momma BUT my little sister was a new breed of human. That little girl right there would fight the devil if he tried to put her hands on her im talking from toddler if my mom tried to spank or grab her rough she would screw up her face and hit her back and they'd just be fighting eachother until my mom gave up or someone watching had to say something. My mom learned real quick spanking her was useless and that one of those days she was actually just going to have to kill her because my sister could take punches and still hit back...similar to Tamaras son the only thing that worked on my little sister was ignoring her. That pride was hurt if she couldn't get attention. Meanwhile I'm the opposite you ignore me I'm glad we can both play them games my mom try ignoring me by the end of the week she'll forget why and realize I'm the one ignoring her. If she picked up anything to hit me with though I was done doing whatever I was doing wrong for life. Every child is different
Jasmine Valiente y'all are wilding, send your kids to jamaica if u want to discipline them, we don't play with nobody much less our kids, hit who back!? Must be crazy.
PREACH....don't care who or what you are, if your child is hitting or kicking you, then something is wrong with how you raising his ass...I'd be embarrassed AF to go on national television and admit that my child does that to me....hell to the naw
Although it is wildly popular (I was even spanked), it's obvious that spanking teaches your children that using physical violence will get you what you want. This has been proven through study after study. Just because it doesn't traumatize all children who are spanked doesnt mean it should still continue to be done. Just like children can be traumatized by something horrible and not be the same and others can bounce right back. I see a lot of you saying that time outs don't work and that children are being disrespectful because they're not spanked which makes me sad that you all are so limited in how you can effectively punish your children. It affects the rest of their life and how they treat/hit others, so I think spanking is bad.
It's not easy being a parent. Kids don't come with manuals. We're trying our best and in no way is it our intention to traumatize our kids, but we were raised a certain way so it's hard to change generational habits all at once. No one is perfect.
I’m with Jeannie. It really takes a village but we lost that with all the “Don’t tell me how to raise my child.” That’s not just your child, it’s a person. And people can learn direction from anywhere.
I remember all too well the "wait til we get home.." oh how much I prayed that something came up & my mom forgot. Sometimes she did & other times she let me think she forgot... those times were the worst 😩 and don't get me STARTED on the "wait til your father comes home".... 💀 but as Tamera said, I turned out alright 😊
Im the youngest of 5 and I was actually very spoiled by my father but I lived with my mother and she didn't play at all and I definitely got the extension cord a couple of times. However I was a really good kid growing up.
Jeannie, Africans feel your pain. My parents thought kitchen utensils, slippers, belts, tree branches, and hair brushes were tools for disciplining children.
Jeannie you my favorite girl !!! And your mom is so funny. You know what my aunt or grandma would think if they seen such behavior of child? They would think something is wrong with the parent and not the child and then give the kid that look of “you better not..”. Because you letting your child get to that point where he is kicking and screaming calling you stupid just doesn’t work!!
exactly. agree about strangers touching your child is a no no. but you can't even say something in a stern way. back in the day anyone who was watching you or taking care of you had permission. my mom wouldn't watch anyone whose parent didn't agree or let them watch me. you looked out for them as if they were your own
Tan T these are different times. Back then 95% of adults knew the parents and child and had there best interest at heart. Now days, you have grown people killing, rapping, and kidnapping kids. Everybody does not have your child's best interest at heart, so no you can't touch other people's kids cause you don't know what their mindset is.
MBCrusin You had some grown people back then doing that. You're talking about something different. There is no fear in kids that's why they are so disrespectful to the parents and others. I don't find anything wrong with what Jeannie's mom did
keimonte14 little kids can't sit still hell adults can't sit still people don't have the same attention span anymore and if kids aren't able to understand what they did was wrong then " sitting in time out and thinking about what you did " is totally ineffective
Fifi Lauren Yes, thank you. Very true. The fact that less and less people understand that is why more children are becoming so increasingly disrespectful. It is such a shame.
Whoopings worked for me. Beatings and whoopings are two different things. Not every situation deserves a whooping and Every child is different. So different types of discipline works for different types of children. Time out, whooping, a speech, grounding and so forth work for different people. You may have to try all of them just to see what works for your child then tailor that discipline as they get older.
@@thecrap17yearsago35 You can't say that it never works long term. It does depend on the person. Every person and child is different every situation is different. You can't possibly know for sure that it won't ever work long term.
"You put that back or I attack!" I'm holleringggg😩😂😂. Tamara got lil hood for a sec when she said "if you touch my child, I'll touch you!" You damn right we don't play those games. 💁🏽👏🏾
if you think its scary when your parents wooped ya its even scarier when your parent sends you to school with a letter allowing your teachers to do it.
The belt!! Our parents hung the belt over top of our bedroom door and wrote in all caps with a green crayon, the word " DISOBEDIENCE" to remind us that if we acted up again, it was gonna be on and poppin! lol
LOL and when we did get popped, they ( our dad specifically) had this chant as were getting it, " BAD THINGS HAPPEN WHEN YOU DISOBEY" Girl, I'll never forget that, but we turned out all right. I know it was out of love. 😂
There's a difference between discipline and abuse..when you abuse your child, they're traumatized for life!!! When you discipline your child, they stay outta of jail and they're the most respected kids you will ever meet..those that never had a whooping, don't know the difference...we got our a** whooped and none of us ever been locked up..we're all grown and successful and very respectful
Yes whoopings work.. if you black, you get beat real good and you'll be straight for 3 to 6 months and probably a year depending on how severe and life changing the whooping was lol.
Why do you need a whopping though? I never needed one..i was a good kid. And if i was bad it was because I didn't understand...so if someone explained it to me i would understand.
Thaleya1 Hey now a whooping is a way of disciplining a child. Now we don't get whooped for EVERYTHING. Parents do warn you before being whooped if the act you did wasn't tolerable for them. And although I have been whipped before, I can count on 1 hand on how many whoopings I recieved. Every child is different, some listen to warnings and some don't. Plus, God say spare the rod spoils the child. Children need discipline. 😀
Brittany Burley Children need dicipline yes...but children don't need spanking. I'm an atheist so i really do not believe in a god that justifies beating kids if that is what you are saying. Whooping kids is a lazy and abusive method of punishing your child into a behavior you think is better, by fear achieving that or failing at the attempt. You can accomplish the same thing by being understanding and explaining things to your child and removing the child from the situation. I think it's terrible to hit kids..we don't hit cats or dogs or adult...but kids that are completely innocent and dont understand how is that ok?
Thaleya1 Well some kids don't take talking and explaining to heart cause if a child keep doing something bad, and you just talk to them Every time they do something bad, they're going to take the parent for granted and look at them as a push over, and over time the child will get worse. Whooping your child shows your child you care for them and love them. It's not abuse. Punching a child, throwing an iron, beating for every little thing etc is abuse. Whooping is discipline and a form of punishment. It's not like we whoop the child without explaining why. As a matter of fact, parents never want to whoop the child but parents know that they're Kids need discipline. Kids actually love and respect the parent more as well after being disciplined because right after the child gets done crying, they immediately run to their parents to be held and loved on and they learn respect because mommy and daddy ain't gone tolerate what ever it is they did. A child can tell the difference between a whooping and abuse.
Yes Tam! I would do the same thing with my little sister since she grown to now, I would ignore tell him why I'm ignoring her and wait till she stop...and she STOP. So I agree with you!
