Grief: The Process and Expectations 

Thank you for mentioning that grief is not limited to death.

ive started watching you about 7 years ago and you have changed my life back then i keep coming back to you because you always help me through dark time. thank you for being here

Just in the right moment Sara you always post when I need it I lost a dear old friend of mine actually he was my first love he died last Thursday 4 th of july I just feel like my soul hurts I don't know how to explain my pain but I am not scared of this process I am going throught it , thank you And pray for me guys ❤❤ .

I woke up this morning feeling really sad about health issues and trauma that I went through last year. It feels so hard to still be sick/ not doing everything I want to be doing even though I look “healthy”. I’m feeling grief. Grief for what I thought my 20’s would be like. Thank you for sharing. I needed to watch this video this morning

Grieving over the self, such a good and real topic!❤

I still haven’t watched the videos but my grandma is about to pass and I was going to watch your old videos on loss and this really feels like a synchronicity, I love you Sara ❤

When my husband was dying, I was in the DEEPEST denial. At one point I told him. He said in denial of what? And I said, of how sick you are. He said he was too. Yet we continued, in our separate denials, then he accepted the inevitable to a degree more than I. It was horrible. Awful. It’s been 2.5 years and tears roll down my face as I type this. I lost him in 1-2022 (mostly) to a GD Covid shot, and it rips my heart to bits to this day. Grief comes in many flavors, this is the bitterest yet. 😢

Girl, I’m obsessed with you 😭 idk what is it about you but you have this gentle, nurturing energy and i feel so close to you 🫶🏼 may you always be happy and healthy ❤

When my mom died last year, I had two people tell me that it was life and that I should just get over it. But they never felt what I had felt. Being only 32, it felt like I lost all the potential time I could have had with her, and it was taken away so soon and so quickly. I stopped talking to those people immediately. I told them off and just blocked them. I don't understand how people can be so callous.

Sara, is there a way to contact you? I can’t remember if I’ve asked this before. This video, for one, I’m so grateful to see your face and hear your voice again but also: I can’t tell you how desperately needed this is. You are so soothing and your wisdom is like a blanket. I am so grateful to just cozy up underneath it anytime you post. Thank you. You mentioned college. I tried and gave up 3 separate times. I went to the military to feel some sense of purpose, to feel better about myself when in reality I just didn’t really care what happened to me anymore. Well I finally got out and I’m just now getting my AA (I’ll be 27 in November). God has a plan, Sara. We’ll be alright. If we are all so honored to get to watch your life continue to unfold, your purpose is and will continue to be so great…I am so incredibly stoked about your story even now. Much love, Joanna

Made me cry in a good way. Thank you Sara. You are amazing and your wisdom shines through.

Can you do a tutorial on how sleek you get your high ponytails and how you’d do a snatched high bun? Love your vids x

This felt like a warm blanket. I have been experiencing so much griefs lately and i did not know. This was eye opening.

Thank you so much! I think I've been grieving a lot, and this video helped me realise that for a very large part of my childhood; grieving my parents abusive relationship and grieving the person I thought my dad was. Right now I'm 21 and my dad is very ill, and will probably pass soon, and now I feel like I'm back there. It's so hard. Thank you for talking about grief non-related to death as well. I realised I've been grieving having failed my second semester of university last year. Despite having passed this year of uni, and despite finally moving forward in my education and being able to catch up the semester to graduate in time, I still feel so so angry for letting it happen in the first place. I've been watching your videos since I was maybe fourteen or fifteen and they've always been so helpful! Thank you.

i absolutely love and adore you so much!! listening to you talk about any topic amazes me so much just the way you express yourself and the words that you use are so touching and mind opening, thank you for always speaking with your mind, heart and soul. i would love to hear your input on grieving with yourself i haven't even thought about it in that point of view. this was such a well put together, thought out video. please share more of any other topics. i am always fascinated when listening to your videos you are such an inspiration and beautiful soul.

You Are just the Most beautiful Person inside and out, may god bless you and give you a rosegarden way through life!

Hi Sara, I used to watch your videos around 2017-2018 a lot, I was about 14-15 and I think it had quite good influence on me. :) I just wanted to thank you for all your work on RU-vid. Never delete any of your videos, you are unique. I am currently trying to process seeing my sick grandfather pass away. He is like a father to me.. and your videos are really nice to listen to during this time. Thank you

Yes 🙌🏼 to the EVOLUTION OF THE SELF!! Your videos are never too long. Your generation does not have enough deep thinkers as you sharing wisdom. This is immensely helpful. I’m one of your first viewer/listener/evolver alongside of you. We never stop grieving because we are loving creatures that form deep attachments. Thank goodness for grieve and love. Without both we would be doomed. There would be no caring and support in this planet. Blessings to you my dear Sara. I look forward to what’s next. Love, Yolanda. ❤

You look stunning and more mature it's beautiful to see your growth. Your voice sounds kinda like Carry Bradshaw's haha. Great video.

I am your #1 fan 🥹 From Life comes knowledge, from death comes a wisdom. Just like wisdom can’t be taught, death is an experience that is very complicated to share. Sometimes trying to explain life’s preciousness and the importance of relationship status’ feels futile 🙈 I know you know. You are an amazing human and a beautiful speaker! LoVe you, Sara 🦋💜🦋

The way you speak about this is inspiring. I would love to see a video on the evolution of the self, it's a subject I struggle with a lot, and have struggled with a lot. It is maybe my biggest source of grief that comes back throughout different phases of my life. I'm very curious to hear your insights on the subject.

I guess in a way i've been in denial, too. With growing up and entering a world where my best friend isn't in anymore now that she's passed. I reminisce all the time about our old adventures and things we've done together. I was in shock for a couple of years after it happened. One day i just realized i woke up from it all and i think that's where the denial settled in. Like, i know she's gone, but i keep feeling like she's right around the corner. And i can't accept that i don't live the life i used to. Guess i didn't really realize it till watching this. People in my life have experienced grief. But no one my age that experienced it in the same ... way? (no one around me) Grief is grief. I felt it when my grandpa passed, and i was so young that i was sad but i could play with my friends still. When my grandma passed i was 18-19 and i felt it so much differently. A huge hole in our lives. She was such a presence to us. A home and rock. I felt a lot of anger then. And then our family dog died. Guilt was the heaviest feeling then. Same when my lizard passed just before my grandma. And two years later when my best friend died... it was so detrimental. No grief i knew could compare. I think all of them being year after year left a huge mark, but hers was the final. Shock, guilt, fear, anger, anxiety, numbness. So many things i felt without her in my life. Even resentment for how much of my life was being lost and overshadowed by her death. It was so surreal to see death come for someone so young and so close to me. You always hear about grandparents, old people, pets. It doesn't take from the trauma of it. But when its a friend, partner, parent, or child there's a specific darkness there. Making you feel almost like you're alone at sea or something. Ebbing like a ghost and kind of afraid. And i don't compare versions of grief like it's a contest. I just compare my own grief with my own grief. But it's so important not to get stuck and i realize how much i've been dealing with unresolved grief. Because it felt like it was just me and no one around me could help me even when they tried. I still have to finish the video but thanks for posting it.

thank you for talking about this. after I lost my dad I learned that we don't talk about grief enough.

You are wise beyond your years and so very articulate. Why a beautiful complex soul you are ❤

Grief over your old self is a very real process. I got sick when i was 19, prior i was a fit healthy gymnast (like you). i grieved for years over my old self, my old body.. i still do sometimes.. No one ever warns you or tells you when you become sick, chronically, not only will you be struggling with the illness, youll be grieving as well, and unfortunately most people dont understand that so things are said or done (with good intent) that can amplify the grief of your old self. Great topic Sara, not one ive ever heard anyone cover. 😊

29:17 I think that’s also a sign of codependency. Trying to control others- oh boy did I do that too. ❤️

You always come through with what is going on in my life at the exact right time. I love you. You’re like a big sister to me. 💜

I was waiting for this omg

You look gorgeous girl

You are honestly my comfort person ❤️ relate to you so much

Dearest sara, so glad you’re back! In the past year I had knee surgery, my best friend passed away, and my aunt passed away as well. Grief comes in many unique ways. Thoughts and prayers to everyone struggling right now❤️

This message is so meaningful. The way you have transformed your past experiences into these comforting and wise words is the most important thing we can do, I believe. This should be in school, especially taught from people who have been through it in these kinds of way. I’m listening and ready to understand even if I don’t completely understand yet ❤ I love you!

Thank you so much for sharing your experience, it's helped me so much hearing your story and it's been so validating

Thank you Sara! İ am 46 an lost my dad a year ago and it still hurts so much… your Videos and your authenticy are amazing. Thank you for your content…i feel so lost right now… i miss him so so much 😢 anyways: Thank you and much love from Germany! 🧡

Thank you so much, its overwhelming how you simply explain your experience and opinions without other intention but sharing. Thank you!!

I havent watched you in a while but man does this video resonate with me. I lost one of my best friends to suicide eight months ago now and the pain is unreal but not fully what I expected. I feel so much shame about this but along with the typical feeling of sadness, guilt, anger, confusion, I felt waves of jealousy?! Perhaps more that she's gone whilst I have to carry on. Her suffering has ended whereas I have to continue to face life. We bonded over the stress of life and our worries, so when she went it almost felt like she'd beat me to it, or abandoned me. I've never wanted to die but I don't want to exist either. I feel like I can't 'do' life and now that she's gone there's more pressure for me to stay; I cant double the pain for my friends who would be even more alone if i went too. I hope it gets easier, i just miss her so much.

You literally went through everything my mind has gone through whilst grieving most recently my two beautiful cats today especially was a bad day.

Thank you for this Sara ❤️

I lost my dad 3 years ago due to covid and still feel it's hard to deal with grief it's unendable thing

Still Chasing That Date 10 Years In 🥴

I’m so glad you’re still doing RU-vid. 💐💛

Great vid Grieving multiple losses at the same time rn. Death of my only parent figure, loss of my only friendship with someone I knew since I was 13, and much more. This vid felt nice to see right now.

❤ true Sara.. I'm so.glad you mentioned even a tv show. Cos i just binge watched Homeland in week.. I'm real sad... grieving my health situation.... grieving is real. Stuck in bed so I binge watched Homeland the series.. its funished ....8 seasons.. i really miss Claire Danes..... i loved characters. Brody.. Quinn.. Max. I literally cried when they died. Its about spies espionage.. so well written. Sorry if i sound silly. Im bed ridden with pain at moment. Ive been in physical debilitating pain for most my life.. autoimmune diseases... . So i finally watched the series... Took them 7 years to make .. And another thing i first watched you Sara maybe 5 years ago. Then i suddenly lost you.. i don't know how it happened.. but i truely grieved. I prayed alot then not long ago i saw your beautiful face. So your right. Grieving is a real thing.. it causes ne P.T.S.D... but i also develooed that from domestic abusive childhood violence...

I could listen to you speak to me for weeks

What is grief but love persisting

I never thought of grieving an idea to be a real thing - I’m grieving a guy I dated for not long and hardly even knew and I can’t stop thinking about what we could of been. I feel so seen right now damn

Thank you Sara ❤‍🩹

i am watching this a few hours after returning home from admitting myself into a 3 day psychiatric hold, mainly because i have been shoving down the feelings of the grief of my fathers death last year. this video is just so wonderful and helpful in so many ways. i wish i had seen it a few days ago but i am so glad i am seeing it now. your videos have been such a guiding light for me over the years and i am grateful that you share such vulnerable topics with us, because it's so easy to feel alone and lost. thank you for all that you do!

Your leaving that house?

SARA I’m so glad u posted so good hearing from you. I hope all is well thank you so much for this video❤❤

the only reason I'm still on youtube

This video is incredibly thought-provoking, shedding light on various important aspects of life. It emphasizes a crucial lesson: never take time or the people in your life for granted; a powerful reminder to address unresolved situations and express unspoken words. The importance of seizing the moment and appreciating the present. Yep. Glad you're back. (Did you?)

welcome back🥹🥹🥹🤍🤍

abnormal reactions to abnormalities are quite normal. thanks for bringing this topic here, you've been helpful in the way you articulating it, I might talk about it in my new therapy session because this seems so familiar to me- im saying the process. this was me after a big dream of mine have failed and have no passion since then.. god damn I was questioning why I was never dreaming about something anymore.. I feel like the seed of my dreaming plant has been dead already I can not bring it back to life, but maybe... maybe this time I can say that... maybe I have another plants' seed inside of me that I can give chance to grow again.. (sorry for rambling) lol

Love you girlll❤

Your videos helped me years ago with dealing with my own grief. I rarely hear or see people talk about grief. I lost my mom when I was younger and I couldn’t grieve her because my family is so toxic. That was extra grief to realize peoples true intentions during and after a death. I found you again recently and I’m so grateful for you. I started to post my own videos years ago around how to deal with life after grief and manifesting with a new healthy mindset. I took a video down that I had posted cause it was so personal and I’m afraid I’ll be rejected because of my family but you reminded me today how important it is to share our stories and speak about this. I made it public again. It’s for me and my own healing to remain open. Not anyone else but it does help those who actually want to heal and overcome. Grief comes in so many forms. ❤️‍🩹 my heart feels for you so much. This is such a paradox to be so aware and so heartbroken by life’s circumstances. You inspire the Heaven out of me. What you are doing and speaking about is so so so powerful. You just being YOU! I’m so proud of you! 💚 thank you Sara.

thank you Sara ❤

I missed you!!!

I actually love u thank u, got out of a 5 year relationship to focus on my health and have surgery soon and my health makes me feel like I’m grieving a life I thought I would have before I was sick

😍😍

Sorry you had to learn these lessons far too soon (although the wisdom gained through the experience has positive aspects as well). Stay strong and keep learning about life. I’ve been tuned in to your channel for a long time because I love hearing the words you have to say. I’ve seen the growth and refinement of you and your ideas and really am rooting for you to find the greatest peace and joy life has to offer.

hey ur video is always so comforting and like listening to a frd sharing deep stuff : > sending u love!!!

I missed u a lot

Interesting

❤ you are a special soul with a mission❤ you bring something ❤ take care beautiful woman

Thank you for your videos. Just by being you you are changing worlds and healing hearts ❤ you make me feel less alone. forever grateful for you

Thank you so much for this video, sincerely.

I don't think you've ever worn something black before in a video 😮 its fitting for the video though you probably did this on purpose

first comment love you ❤

i love you sarah k please don’t ever die ❤

Have you read Crying In H Mart?

💙💙💙

Yess grief on the self!!

Blessings

Hi Bae

why do you keep the unibrow ?

Thank you for posting ! I’ve been feeling really down and unmotivated to do nearly everything lately and your videos always help me push through 🤍