Not confusion but emptiness. The type of peace that comes to a person moments after they leave the realm of sleep where memories of any caliber are forgotten. Bright lights and soft blankets convinced him he was waking up at home. Just for a second. He slowly pushed himself up in his hospital bed while he stared at the open door in front of him. There was a water fountain and a peek of what was most likely a bathroom but other than that he couldn't find anything interesting enough to distract himself from the slowly setting realization of what he'd done. To his left he heard someone readjust to sit forward and watch him. He didn't have to look to guess it was his mother. Had she always looked so tired? She was waiting for him to talk first as she always did when something important happened. He absentmindedly scratched at the tube in his hand, searching for words he didn't have the strength to say. Disassociation prevented him from feeling anything too closely except the pain of seeing his mother's face. Tired. Tired and sad. In the end all he could do was weakly shrug. "I'm sorry." "Me too."
hey. i know life is hard to get through without a guide. but trust me. you’ll get through it, g. life is a test with really hard questions and even harder answers. but sooner or later you’ll ace that test. and live on making everyone and your mother proud.