health scares & why i got surgery 

please keep this comment section positive ❤ love u guys so much

Admitting that you are struggling with depression does not, in any way, make your channel any less the positive place that it’s always been, Amanda!!!!!! As someone with a platform, it’s so helpful for you to talk about your experience because it reminds your viewers that they are not alone in their struggles either. Hang in there, we love you and we want you to be happy, healthy, and safe!

Depression creeps up on people. It’s silent but deadly. Never ignore the signs and don’t be afraid to ask help. You’re not alone. And you got this, Amanda! 💪🏽

as someone who's struggled with chronic depression and female reproductive issues for over a decade i really resonated with you telling your story and struggles. it's such a scary thing to do especially when our jobs are centred around creating a safe happy space for others online. Just wanted to say that you're a badass and such a strong person for not only going through this with your head held high but for also sharing this with everyone. everything will be okay, just keep reminding yourself of that fact. i can tell you from experience that there is no feeling better than when you get to the other side of that tunnel. stay strong Amanda, always here if you need a chat 💕

As a Doctor working in OBGYN, I commend you on how maturely and concisely you spoke about such a difficult period for you. You definitely will bring greater awareness to this, just by sharing your experience and hopefully enlighten healthcare professionals who fail to advocate for both Women’s health and Mental health, especially amongst the youth. Thank you for this, and always remember to listen to your body - you have been with it longer than any healthcare professional has.

I’ve been a silent supporter/viewer for yearsssss now but I wanted to comment today to let you know you are so loved and so supported. It takes a lot of bravery to be open and vulnerable like this and although it is hard, I appreciate you so much for being honest about things like this. I think it can be so easy for people to get caught up in comparisons or even just the illusion of picture perfect lives on social media, from influencers and non influencers alike. So thank you for normalizing this topic and bringing awareness to it and letting your viewers know NO ONE has a “picture perfect” life. I am wishing you nothing but the best during this time. Be gracious with yourself, show yourself love and patience. We are ALL rooting for you. Sending you so much love

It's amazing to see the majority of the comments being positive as I scroll down, this feels so nice knowing that this community definitely gives space to nurture

Oh, Amanda 😔 I’m so sorry you’ve been facing these health issues, both physical and mental, for so long. I’m so glad you’re finally in a place of treatment and have hope on the horizon that things will get better. Depression is so hard to live with and seeing all you continue to accomplish despite your brain working against you is something to be so so proud of ❤ please be kind to yourself, because you really do deserve that self compassion. I’m always a text message away if you want to talk through some of that messy hard sad stuff. Sending you the biggest hug 🫂

i had my period for 6 months in 2020, went to the hospital twice and had 2 surgeries for the same reason!! i also had a way thicker lining than normal in addition to the polyps. i dealt with this for a year before it was resolved fully. if these things grow outside of your uterus it is considered cancerous and they will have to remove ur uterus completely, so if you experience any symptoms that amanda mentioned PLS get checked out asap!!

Hemoglobin is the molecule inside the red blood cells that carries oxygen to the cells of your body, a vital step for most metabolism pathways. It's a very important little buddy! I'm so sorry you had to go through all that experience, Amanda. I can't imagine how hard it must have been. You've got our support and love

8:56 omg! in the end of 2019, because my iron was so low, i had to get 5 weeks of iron injections. like 1 per week. i’ve never heard of anyone getting this before. thanks so much for talking about it..🥺 *edit* 14:47 amanda. this video was definitely meant for me.. i’ve been back and forth with the hospital trying to get an ultrasound for my ridiculously heavy periods. i thought i was the only one on the earth who bl*eds an insane amount. i actually have to wear adult diapers and i get my periods every 2 and a half to 3 weeks. i could go on and on about the weird symptoms that i get such as shortness of breath and like chest pains but i’ll spare you. *amanda* you have no idea how much this video means to me. i’m gonna show part of this to my mom because she’s been trying to figure what’s wrong with me too and doing whatever she can to take care of me.. thanks soooo much… i wish i could come to canada just to hug you.😢😢 -jamie

Hi Amanda. FWIW from my fifty-year-old perspective and as a fan, I think you are handling all of this with grace and strength. And generosity because so many of us can relate to what you're talking about and hearing someone with your platform share your own experiences helps us all to feel less alone. So thank you and bless you! You got this!

You can post anything. No matter what we will all love you

It takes a lot from someone to be so vulnerable on camera. I just hope you’re feeling better and continue to do so. We’re rooting for you as Lil Doodles.

I get the fleeting thoughts of death. I don’t want to die and I don’t want to harm myself but it’s exactly what you said - “it would be easier if I was dead.” There’s moments of highs and lows. Be gentle with yourself. Take care and lean on those you can count on. You’re so loved.

I can relate so much to your situation. I had 3-5yrs where I felt like "my uterus was attacking me". Women's health issues really are not talked about enough. How our hormones maintain the delicate balance in our bodies, how that is tied to our mental health, these things should not be mysterious to us. Please take the time to focus on getting better, lean on your family, therapist. Take every day as it comes. Be gentle with yourself. All us Lil Doodles are happy you exist and support you continuing to do that ❤❤❤ Thanks for sharing. You are not alone.

Amanda, you don't know how much this video speaks so much to me. I've also experienced the same thing last year with all the heavy bleeding, being low in iron, feeling so down and all that. I was really scared with the results as well and what will happen with the future. Thankfully, my doctor said it was nothing serious. But still, I know how hard it is to go through all of these things happening in our physical and mental health. I hope you know that you are not alone and that just by existing in this platform, you're already helping a lot of us out here to keep pushing and fighting. You are amazing and you are needed in this world. Sending you lots of love from Japan! ❤

So many women's issues are overlooked. Lots of women have fx endometriosis but doctors never check them out properly and just accept the pain / problems. I hope you find the cause and preventive solutions like maybe microbiom or other. God bless ❤️

i've also mostly been a silent supporter but the last half of this video really resonated with me. i've been seeing a therapist for anxiety and have only recently discovered i may have major depressive disorder. the scariest thing was the day i went to bed and thought hey, if i didn't wake up that might not be the worst thing. it's an absolutely terrifying mindset to be stuck in and i'm so glad you've found a supportive doctor to help you through this. sending you so much love.

As someone also struggling with this, I can tell you this. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!! It’s one thing to admit it, and it’s another to fight it and see where it take you; and that’s one of the bravest things to do, ever!! We have all got your back no matter what. Sending you the biggest hug my darling, you’ve got this

Depression is so hard. When you start to come out of it, you begin to realise how you weren’t by yourself at all, it was just the illness putting a veil over your eyes. We all love you here no matter what! You are my personal OG bullet journal RU-vidr, and the reason I got started in the first place, and I couldn’t imagine that journey without you and your positive vibes helping me along the way. Please don’t go anywhere, because we certainly won’t ✨

Talking about period/menstruation normalizes it, and empowers women to advocate for themselves rather than being embarrassed or thinking "I'm weird." Thank you for sharing, I understand it CANNOT be easy.

Depression does sneak in. I got help & now I’m fine & back to myself. I also have uterus issues. Glad you finally found a doctor who took it seriously and was able to help you.

The ability for you to come out and speak about this - all of this - can, and most likely will save and help other people. It’s refreshing to know that we are all human, and we all have issues, as different and diverse as they are. I mean, I’m 40 years old, watching you do journaling. I am married, I have a daughter and 3 dogs. BUT…YOU helped me get back into my artistic talent, YOU are a breath of fresh air in my life of chaos. I know that many of us will support you, pray for you, and be patient with you on this journey. Thank you for this video, and I do hope this relieves your fears as much as our concerns. And Thank You for everything you do!!!! (oh, and you need a puppy!)

You are so incredibly brave to share what you’ve been through. You are such a beautiful, warm and talented person. Please have patience and compassion for yourself because you absolutely deserve that. Sending lots of love and energy your way!

hi amanda! you’ve been a source of relaxation and happiness for me because of yours videos. your voice calms me down and whenever i watch your content i always feel safe and at home. it pains me to watch this and see you go through all that physical and mental pain. i am super proud of you for getting help and for being so strong in conquering all your battles. i hope that you constantly surround yourself with loved ones and people who make you genuinely happy. we love you so much and we are willing to wait for your content because a few videos is nothing compared to wanting you to have a full and easy recovery. health is always the priority. love you!

Thank you Amanda for making this video🫶🏻sending love and positivity to you and all of you who are watching this video💗

🥺 Sending you love and virtual hugs!! ❤🫂Thank you for being so open and vulnerable! We love you and appreciate you!! You got this! 💪

thank you for sharing this amanda

Thank you for sharing this Amanda. I went through the same experience when I was in high school, and the doctor said the same thing to me. It's been a crazy ride dealing with this over the years. Thank you for sharing so candidly. Post whatever you want and your loyals will always be here to support you. Sending lotsa love your way! :)

Thank you for being so transparent and vulnerable with us. We love you and know videos like this can be difficult to put into the world. We appreciate you ❤

LOVE setting boundaries and opening up! Praying for you and your health!

thank you for sharing! ❤ you’re so brave to tackle issues with your body and mind and share it as well! it’s very relatable for me, and I’m so hopeful for you. i’m very grateful that we are living in a time that people are becoming more open about mental health and we can have these conversations. ❤

I love you Amanda 🌸💗. You have my support for every decision you will ever make you’re so brave and I’m so proud of you 🌷🌹. The internet really is a scary place .

sending you so much love Amanda❤️ thank you being so vulnerable, even though you didn’t owe us anything. I could really relate to your fear of oversharing and hearing that made me feel understood. you’re so strong, and I’m praying that you’d just be filled with so much peace right now🙏🏼💞

You’re very courageous to share your thoughts and feelings to everyone through this video. Thank you for being brave to share your life and fighting the battle with us. We’re here to support you all throughout. Praying for your total healing. I am glad to be part of your community. Hugs and prayers for you Amanda. ❤

I’m sending you all of my love and positive thoughts. It’s really hard to open up about these topics. You are paving the way for others to do the same. 💙

So raw. We're so proud of you for reaching out for help and also sharing this on the internet . I hope youre proud of yourself as well. Youre amazing ... We're all here for you ❤

I'm so glad you chose to share your experiences and feelings. I think your honesty and vulnerability will touch many people and hopefully help anyone who's going through something similar, I know you've inspired me to keep a closer eye on my health, mental and physical. Thank you, you have a strong heart

i’m sending you so much love, amanda 💗 i’ve also dealt with some scary and confusing health issues over the last few years that took a toll on my mental health, and even though things have been better recently, i’m still figuring out where i stand mentally. i hope you start feeling better soon, both physically and mentally 💗💗

Illness trauma is real, there is a lot of things to face and process. The “death would be easier” thought moment, been there because of illness and it is scary. Being honest with yourself and others is important and therapy has helped me immensely through my own struggles. All the best and all the luck!

I am proud of you! You are strong! You are loved! Being able to recognize that something wasn’t feeling right and taking the action step of seeking out help is the hardest part, but it’s also the part that shows you’re the strongest you’ve ever been. Bring able to admit something is wrong is not easy, so you should take pride in the fact that you sought out help. You putting this on the internet is going to reach so many audiences and is going to help so many others get help. You are amazing, be proud of your journey and be proud of you ♡︎

I have so much love and respect for you. Here's to hoping things will get better, because you're being brave and you're helping so many others by speaking out about something so scary

I'm so proud of you for being so open to tell us what has been going on with you. I pray that will help with the start of your healing process. Prayers sent to you!

it's so brave of you to make this video, i imagine it has been really hard. i've went through some of these things and it scares me a little sometimes, but i cope exactly like you. i even relate to the fact that it's only when i get better that i realize just how bad i was. i've been watching you since 2018 and you've done so much, i love seeing you live. i hope you keep getting better and i hope maybe bangtan will help bringing some joy at times. please take care, i wish only good things to you

Hi amanda💓💓 im Francisca from chile, and i ‘ve been watching your videos since 2017 when i was 17 years, now im 23 and im so happy than you could finally talk about your feelings and just all the things that has been going on in your life💓 Now im graduating from psycology and i really know it takes so much brave to talk about your really deep feelings and througs. I just want to say thank you for your bravery and for staying here. Its okey to not be ok, and its ok to tell the people you are not ok when you need it. Thank you so much for all these years🥺💓 and i really want to you to be healthy and happy, so take all the time you need and just talk about whatever you want and need.

love u girl, you've got this. i relate to a lot of this and something my brother told me was that talking about it instead of keeping it all up inside is one of the first steps to getting better. you've got a bunch of people rooting for you! ♥

Thank you for sharing your story ❤️ we are here for you 100%! You are so strong, you got this!

I'm so glad you're doing this, because it means that you've headed on the way to getting better. I got a depression for the first time in my life when I was about your age and I had not the slightest idea that it was in fact that - a depression. I also thought that this is just how I'd feel for the rest of my life and it was so bad. I'm so so glad that you're getting help. It is true - you will feel better again. ❤ I'm sending you all the hugs and wish you all the best! We're here with you ❤

there is so much to takeaway from this video, so don’t say there’s nothing! i love happy endings as much as you do, but the truth is life is always in progress and continuing every moment we’re alive, so as many tough things there are i truly believe just as many good things are waiting, little or big. (even if that’s really cheesy and idealistic!) thank you for sharing your experience amanda!!! i think it’s really important to process struggles as heavy as this by sharing, and for us as watchers it’s just as important because we feel less alone. i wish you the very very best in every step you take forward. ❤❤

Thank you so much for sharing, I've watched you for so many years and you've brought so much joy with your videos! It's so brave of you to share something so personal and we all appreciate it so much! You've created this amazing community and we are all here for you!❤❤

I’m so glad you got the care you needed and that you were able to persist through this difficult process. It takes a lot of courage to do what you did. And ultimately, I’m grateful you’re doing better ❤️

You are not alone and by you speaking about your diagnosis and struggles you are allowing others to be open and honest with themselves and seek their own help for whatever they are going through.

Awh amanda, I really wish I could give you a hug rn☹ Whenever you feel bad, just remember that we love you and we will always be here for you! You are so so strong for making this video, it takes much courage to be vulnerable on the internet! Also, take your time to heal, it can be difficult, but try to take one step at a time!!

Amanda you’re so strong for sharing this❤️ as someone who also deals with anxiety & depression, it’s hard to not fall in a rut sometimes, but everyday is a new day to try and do something positive for yourself. Sending all the love and healing energy your way, we’ll get through this together☀️😊

This is such an important video you've posted. Talking about health (physical and mental) is so good for people to see. You are normalizing healthy conversations that a lot of people are afraid of having. I'm so happy you have doctors to advocate for you and you're on the way to a better place. You deserve happiness, you deserve health, you deserve to live pain free, and you deserve to post whatever you want without worry of others. 🖤

You won’t be able to count the amount of people you have helped by sharing. Thank you for your honesty and take care. ❤

thank you for sharing this Amanda, sometimes it's easy for us to think "oh well dying would be easier" and not see a problem but putting it in that context of " if I heard someone I care about say something like that I would be hurt and would want them to get help" that really helps us realize that things don't have to be the way they are, it's ok to seek help and it's validating to hear someone else talk about that experience. sending you much love Amanda thank you for sharing this with us ❤

you're so amazing Amanda, i love you and i hope so much, you get better because you deserve the world ❤

Stay strong Amanda!! Thank you for being so open and honest with us, please know that you are loved and supported.

You are a strong woman to express yourself as you did, health issues are difficult to deal with especially the kind you have! Sometimes by expressing yourself you will find others with similar issues and you will probably help someone else dealing with issues. Support groups are a wonderful way to have that human contact that we all need! And let someone else read the comments before you do so they can delete them for you before you see them! I hope this positive comment will help you as you have inspired me while bullet journaling!

Watching now but just let me say, my prayers are with you babygirl 💕✨🙏🏽

I am sending you the biggest of hugs ❤❤ So sorry to hear what you have been going through 😢 You are incredibly appreciated, we'll remind you of that in times when it would just take too much effort to do so yourself.

I'm so incredibly proud of you💚 What you're going through is so incredibly rough and it's a lot. I can't say I know exactly what you're going through, because they're your experience. I do however feel myself in some of this ❤ One day at a time, one moment and one breathe. I can't thank you enough for all the videos you've made. Seriously made such an impact on my life, creatively and mentally. Love you so much 💚

Amanda, i know you probably won’t see this but i want you to know truly how strong you are not only for going through all of this but also for sharing this with the world. in the last year i’ve gotten a PCOS diagnosis (which has affected my periods since they started and will also most likely affect my fertility in some way) and a hypothyroidism diagnosis, which took three years of constant fatigue and 80 lbs of weight gain to finally get diagnosed. i also have always had a depression diagnosis, but in the last year i also had a suicide scare and was shortly after diagnosed with ADHD. dealing with all of these things has been extremely exhausting and stressful, especially because it’s a combination of mental and physical health issues. i know we don’t have the exact same medical issues but i can relate to the fatigue and stress that you’ve been feeling and i’m so proud of you for surviving through it ❤

Oh, dear Amanda, I’m sending you a big, big hug. I’m not sure if you realize how brave it is to make such a confession, face everything you’ve been through and seek help. You’re a warrior! Be nice to yourself ❤ Lots of love and support ❤

As a person who’s been struggling a lot both mentally and physically lately it means a lot for me to hear that even though it feels hard in the moment I’m not alone in my struggles. You’re so strong for sharing your hardships with us ❤

I’m so sorry you’ve been going through this. This video has really helped me to realise what you and some friends and family in my life might be going through. Thank You. xx

Oh honey. You’re precious and so brave. Depression is awful, but it’s also very treatable and you are certainly not alone. I’ve been through it. No one has to suffer or ‘deserves’ it. It’s verrrry difficult to make the first step to get help, and you did it. ❤ Please take meticulous baby care of yourself, Amanda. I’m a stranger, but I’m proud of you. edit: p.s. I had a surgical procedure on my uterus too. You’re definitely not alone there either!!

Passive suicidal ideation is tough to go through. I get it, I know some friends of mine who went through the same thing..Fleeting suicidal thoughts are a warning sign. I am glad you are getting help. Depression is something a lot of people go through, you are not the only one. You have a lot of bravery and strength to admit that you are going through depression. We know you can get through this, Amanda. There is always hope for recovery and happiness. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel and we know you will come out happy and healthy, on the other side. Proud of you, girl. You got this. 💪🏻

a positive space on the internet is one that makes room for mental health. we aren’t just fans of you we are friends! and friends are here for those they love ❤❤

I appreciate this video so much because I am going through a similar predicament and understand its pain. Thank you so much for raising awareness and being so vulnerable with us. You are such a strong and beautiful person! We love you.

I've heard it said, we're only as sick as our secrets, so now you've opened up about it. You truly are on the road to healing. Thank you for being vulnerable enough to open that conversation and normalize it enough that people will realize why they need to get support and help. End the stigma.

Discussing this with your Doctor is the first step, just know every step widens your smile and brightens your thoughts. I am from the older generation and just want to give you a hug and congratulate you for being brave. This video can only HELP you and many the others it reaches. Sending you all the Love. 💖💖💖💖

Thank you for sharing . Being honest with yourself is the first step. Praying for you as you go on this journey to healing. Take care.

i’m so sorry you had to go through this , as a person who struggled with depression for some few years i promise you it’ll get better the sadness you currently feel with become a stranger to you and you’ll find yourself again 🫂 , love you amanda good luck i hope you know we all have you in our hearts

last September I also underwent surgery almost similar as yours (myomectomy surgery, English is not my first language so it's my assumption that it's similar). Doctor found 8 centimeters myoma in my uterus. (Myoma = fibroids, non-cancerous tumors). The fact that the size is 8 centimeters make it has to be taken out. Women have so many silent killers so I think it is good that you share your story and raise awareness about this. I'm wishing you full recovery at your own pace. Recovering from surgery is a long journey, but you are definitely strong and you will get through this. Sending love 🤍

Amanda ❤ as someone with medical trauma that i didnt even know about for years, just to say i really recommend talking the idea of medical trauma through with a therapist when you feel ready... Medical stuff is no joke, even if its 'not that bad' it's so stressful and scary for our brains to handle. But with the support of a therapist it doesn't have to be insurmountable! I found that my brain had been turning my stressful medical experiences into some really shitty self narratives that i wasn't even aware of, but together we worked out how to be more compassionate and take my experiences seriously. And i dont think about death so much anymore. Sending you so much love and support from across the ocean, im so sorry all that happened to you. you got this and things can only get better ❤

Thank you so much for being so brave in sharing your story with us. Just know that you’re not alone and to stay strong through all of this ❤

You have my biggest support Amanda ! That is such a tough experience to go through. Hearing you speak on your own struggles makes me and many other feel less alone. Thank you for sharing your story. ❤

I’ve never commented on one of your videos before (even though I’ve been following for years). You are so brave to share your story and it will help so many others. I am a teacher and one thing my students tell me is that when influencers share their stories, it has a gigantic impact on the lives of others. You telling your own story, with all of the details, validates others too. You got this!

You are so strong, Amanda. ♥ I'm sorry you were dismissed and discounted by doctors for so long. It feels like every time a woman suffers, the doctors just write her off. It took me over 6 years of being told "it's all in your head", "it's just your period", "you're just being hysterical", etc. before I got an actual diagnosis on what was wrong with me. Please take care of yourself! Healing vibes to you~

i first started watching your content in 2020 and i would admire how beautiful you would make something so ordinary and the way that your art would transform a bullet journal… at the time, i was going through some tough things and honestly this video put a lot of things into context for me. i don’t think the world knows how much we need people to be open because as much as they want to say they’re making strides, it doesn’t feel like enough… i am so proud for you to feel ok with putting this out and i hope you know that there are so many on your side and that what you put out in the world truly does a lot for the world. i think i definitely admire you more after today and you have created such a safe space in this small but mighty corner of the internet. thank you so much for what you do and i hope you are taking good care of yourself 💞

i'm so proud of you, amanda. you're so inspiring to me and i know realizing that you have depression is not easy. i hope you never have to feel like you need to hide things. lil doodles are so proud of you. we love you 💋🫶

Hopefully you are doing better now and just know that it’s okay to take breaks! 😊

Thank you for sharing this Amanda. Went through all of this in the same order. Somehow hearing your story makes me feel less alone and seen. Also it is so comforting to see how strong you are and proving me that I can help myself. What you do is so important in so many ways. Thank you for being here for us. But remember you are first always. Love you.

big hugs for you Amanda

I can’t believe the doctors took so long to have you make an ultrasound omg. Hope you’ll get better, Amanda! ❤️

My dear Amanda, I want to start this comment by saying I feel so much empathy for you. ❤ I also suffer from depression, anxiety and got diagnosed with hypothyroidism just a few years ago. I am so, so proud of you for sharing your journey with us, both physical and mental. It is totally okay to be struggling and not have a resolution at hand. Most of the time there really isn't one and that's also totally okay. You don't owe us anything. I honestly feel so honored to be part of the audience who gets to hear about your life situation and feelings, I hope you know that. You are not alone in this, I promise. You will feel better again, I can also promise you that. Take care and I'll see you again when you stream ❤

TY for being so raw and transparent with this part of your life. Take the time to recover and remember that you are so blessed to be able to get help with surgery and sadness. A lot don’t have those options. 🙏🏻

Thank you Amanda for sharing this to us. Just want you to know that we are proud of you and you are so brave. Sending all the hug ❤❤❤

❤I don’t comment often but want to say thank you for this! And send a big as hug!!!I wish this kind of sharing existed when i was younger, especially as someone who never opened up about my problems with sadnes, loneliness’s and constant anxiety, Thinking this is just how i am. I just always thought I was different…. Finally went to a psychologist in my late 20is but it took several more years and a friends su***, before i finally went to a psychiatrist and actually got a diagnosis, it was freeing. And after finally starting with meds, i understood that there was another way to feel… and I finally understood what “normal” was…. Lol … have to laugh cause I didn’t think it was posible… so know i tell anyone who asks, I’m open about it and if people can’t deal that’s on them. Share, care and let people know there is hope so they know they can share too!

Having a ''positive'' space on the internet does not mean toxic positivity of nothing is ever wrong

Girl you are a queen .Feeling like that is not good but we all can eventually cope up with hard times.❤️love and hope you get better and the best of you.

Thank you so much for sharing your journey, Amanda. I'm studying to become a therapist and one of the most difficult units was learning how to ask those types of questions in a sensitive and supportive way. I know they are intense and very scary to think about, but it does help to say the words out loud and have someone there to hear you and hold a non-judgmental space for you to work through those struggles. Also, I strongly believe in the mind-body connection, and I imagine that when your mind is not at 100%, that affects your body, and when your body is not at 100%, that in turn affects your mood, emotions, feelings, etc. Your story will help so many people find the courage to reach out and seek help for themselves, so thank you so much for being vulnerable for us ❤

Hi Amanda, I just want to say that before I become severely depressed and get my diagnosis, I was in denial about mental health problems in general. That's because in Greece, my country, the majority of people wouldn't be aware that it is an actual disease. Fortunately, that has changed the past few years. I am very sorry to hear that you struggle, I know from personal experience that it can make someone feel lonely and hopeless without any specific reason. Usually, advice is better from a professional who has more knowledge on the topic, but what helps me see the positive side, is to see depression as a journey to figure out more about myself. We, Humans can be very complex, and some of us might get confused while trying to figure out our purpose. Don't worry, thought it can get tough sometimes, it is also something that makes you stronger and, interestingly, helps you learn surprising stuff about yourself. I'm sending all my love to you and everyone who has a hard time with their mental health. Small tip for the friends and loved ones: all you need to do is listen, be patient, accept the situation and try not to judge. But most importantly, in order to help someone who struggles, your priority MUST be to take care of your own mental health first

Hey amanda, I CANNOT STOP SAYING THIS but it’s really admirable that you are so brave to be honest with everyone, that’s something I really admire about you! Keep on going strong and little doodles will really love you and will support you! Take your time with doing things, do what you are more comfortable with. Health definitely comes first so take care of yourself. Sending lots and lots of love for you!! It’ll all be alright, you will do amazing!! Don’t be afraid that people don’t care, we all care about you and wish the best for you!! YOU GO GIRLL!! ❤❤

Amanda, thank you so much for sharing your struggles. Please know you are not alone and sharing all of this is incredibly brave of you. I have major depressive disorder and complex ptsd and can relate to a lot of the mental health things you spoke about. I’m really proud of you for working on yourself and wish you nothing but the best 💕. You are loved and so valuable and I don’t know if you will ever see this but I hope you take comfort in knowing that we all support you 💕

I have watched you since year two of your planning. I rarely comment, but I wanted to tell you how proud I am of you for having the courage to share something so intimate. I'm in my forties and carried the burden of depression with me for 38 years without talking to anyone about it - trust me when I tell you, you have made the first of many hard steps. I can also promise you that it DOES get better! I still have bad days, but nothing in comparison to all that time I didn't talk to someone. Learning about the disease and how it works in you personally is a journey and one that I will never take for granted and have learned so much about myself and STILL learning all the time. You are not alone, and I along with many others I'm sure are cheering you on!!!! You can do this!! :)

So many silent viewers of yours are commenting now, I'm also one of them. I've been watching your videos for the last 6 years but never commented anything. The thing I wanted to say is that as I'm a muslim, whenever I'm down or depressed a bit, I always have hope in God that He's there for me and everything's gonna be fine and that I have a purpose in life that is to worship one true God. I really want you to search about the truth of life. I'm just suggesting you to research on Islam a little and I love you a lot that's why I care for your this life and afterlife. If you want you can see on RU-vid there are many videos of people reverting and how they find peace by connecting to the real God. I hope it works the same for you too. ❤