HISTORY OF IDEAS - Manners 

@JUSTIN YE not necessarily, too many cons in our culture

Dela Flowers yeah because they had AI in the cave with them, that’s how they made fire right ?

Dela Flowers I am young and have immense respect I think it is always important to have respect and be kind, also appreciate the blessings from the smallest thing (which are of course not small things), there are kind humans. I think what is projected in the media and social media and especially the news makes it so easy to forget that there are good people doing good things with humility and joy. More so because the projected image contradicts this.

Dela Flowers I agree completely. It is so crucial. Having said that, I know of people who were profoundly let down by their parents, or absence thereof, who have hearts of gold and are raising their children beautifully but sadly it is a rare thing and the generational situation can replicate itself, though I think that is where governments should come in and help communities. So many things should be taught in school to add extra support but I digress. My point was more that it is so easy to become disheartened with this aspect of humanity, of all ages, and I think it is so important to remember that there are good people who are respectful, appreciative, compassionate and doing good things. Wishing you well.

Dela Flowers you too, I hope it is filled with unexpected joys. Your words really make me think. Obviously I am coming at this from a different perspective, a different generation. I imagine it must be profoundly unsettling to have the world to change so much in your lifetime, before your eyes. I can only imagine… but I think it is important to always be an eternal student, to try to understand, different perspectives, different lives. Just know that there are good people doing good things, longing for kinder times, and more humanity in our world. Where are you from if I may ask? I hope your day is wonderful!

I think what they are trying to say is manners stem from morality and at certain points in history society did not treat these acts as immoral or wrong. In fact the bible never explicitly defines these acts as immoral, coveting someones ox is in the ten commandments but beating or raping women is not. In fact in one bible story a man gives his daughters to a mob so they can rape them(not as a moral lesson not to rape) Judges 19.24. I am glad we have developed enough as a species to realise how abhorrent this is.

that's because depravity is itself a moral question.

What is depravity? What is wrong or right?

YES! Holy shit, I was stunned when rape was excused by explaining that the men had come of age in an era of more relaxed sexual attitudes.

12:55-13:06 he says it pretty clear here

Never thought will see you here Yaah

It's just...so wonderfully straight forward

MIND CONTROL THE GOVERMENT CHEM TRAILS USING FRAMES TO TRICK OUR MINDS ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) v( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Check

+Subparanon lol i paused, and checked the comments to see if i was the only one. at least it wasn't a short porn scene.

+Subparanon School of life has been playing with this idea of subliminal messaging in many videos but at the same time acknowledging how ridiculous it is in others. I think it's just a joke now.

+Bradley Gillap explain?

Yeah there is nothing about asia.

@@johnpauljones1528 or americas

Yup. "Western Civilization".

I agree completely agree. As a person those descendants came from Europe, I especially feel this subject is important to understand my own cultural heritage. I would love to see how other world civilizations developed regarding cultural standards like hygiene and respect for women.

mohammed ali Jinnah what do you mean? What else is there outside of Europe?

You're clearly not a well-read person, nor well-mannered.

+124Andro i'll be way harsher than the OP. You're an uncouth, uneducated moron. It was an Arabic traveler who documented the disgusting hygienic practices he observed amongst Europeans while on a Journey in the middle ages. Particularly, he aboard their bathing habits (or lack there of), their toilet habits, failure to use perfume, etc. It was Shah Jahan in the 1500s who remarked that the Portuguese were nice enough people, but they stank because they didn't clean themselves properly after defecating. The truth is that Europe hardly had a civilized culture until the colonial era, when they picked up good manners of hygiene from their colonial subjects.

+Pearl Daisy indeed. It was considered normal for most Hindu, Buddhist, Jane people in South Asia to bathe daily - with some even bathing thrice during their twilight prayers. Before the period of early modernity, the general trend was that conditions got better the further east you went - with Western Europe being what we would consider Africa or some parts of the Middle East today. It was undeveloped, turbulent, lacking education, culture, or basic hygiene. The modern idea of the west being the best is really a recent development caused by the legacy of colonialism which gave the west the hygiene and culture it prizes itself on today.

I think the anglo-centric thing is just because that's where this guy is from, the tradition he was educated in, etc. It's great and interesting to include as many cultures as possible when discussing these subjects, but very often if a white European or North American tries to talk about other cultures, they are berated for doing so, and accused of speaking on things they know nothing about, have no right to speak about, or cultural appropriation, etc. So it's a pretty tough line to walk. Damned if you do by some, damned if you don't by others.

England is full of white people. He's saying what he knows. Not everybody is the United States. Not everybody glorifies the "melting pot". Europe is predominantly white, and I don't think they have an obligation to be inclusive just because they're white. That's a horse shit notion that has its roots in the U.S. for some reason.

Because it is less than 15 minutes long lol And most of the data in English ia about Europe No wonder In the East there is more material about the local traditions, you would expect

But our avoidance of these acts stems from beginning to use manners.

Yeah that seemed to go off into a tangent there more suited to 4chan incels...British accents can't hide everything it seems. Today I learned: where Bill Cosby erred was that he forgot to say "May I?" before dropping the roofie in...

Yeah I was horrified at that too. I think that was a pretty misfired attempt to say our manners are kind of an everyday manifestation/reflection of the moral compass that we- or more accurately, men- have developed over time. Very poorly worded.

In this case yeah its about manners because the subject line is manners and them being examples of what it means to have manners and what manners are instilled in us at a young age as well as what "manners" means as we get older. Manners are constantly changing as we saw from this video but like how this video also tells us is that the idea of manners stems from kindness towards others as well as vanity and what front we are trying to put up, depending on who the person is they choose to practice manners from one or the other in any given situation. The idea of kindness being the force behind when said manners are used stems from love and we do it earnestly when displaying manners infront of somebody we may or may not know because we want to make feel comfortable. The problem is that love is a scarce resource nowadays so when most people are displaying manners its to put up a front or a "mask" about the kind of person they are and when the person doing this thinks that no one is watching the mask falls and the true self (or at least the force driving said choice they're making) is seen. In the case of these men their choice to harm these women was driven by a force they never truly controlled despite what manners (or "mask") they decided to display.

@@tweaker1bms Interesting that you compare the truth to being a "4chan incel"

No

No

Yes, as soon as somebody writes it.

We need to wait the concept of manners to arrive here first.

The irony of these replies is almost unbearable.

No, it was a bit off putting.

I think it just meant our avoidance of these acts stems from starting to use manners, however sexual harassment is never seen as “just forgetting one’s manners”.

12:55-13:06

He was exaggerating to make a point. It was rather unmannerly of him to trigger us all like that.

I don't think they're using "manners" in the limited context of our modern understanding of it but rather tying into the broader morality issue. Positive actions are moral and negative are immoral. Manners are positive actions

Etiquette is respect and class, disagree

I beg to differ. A decline in etiquette has encouraged people to lean back in their chairs, burp and pass gas in public, and put on lipstick at the table.

It all depends on the class you belong to.

@NothingButTheTruthInChrist barbarian haha

manners are not burping while eating. etiquette is using the right fork when eating.

i don't find them oppresive either, just uncomfortable and useless

You can be strangled with a tie by an envious coworker

Um, prolly cuz he goes all rapist-apoligist toward the end.

@@sierraroseprzybyla3333 lol

Seriously

+Ricardo Camacho And it was a mistake. Not an attempt at a subliminal message, nothing with any meaning whatsoever. Just a mistake.

what was it I couldn't tell

+somegreybloke what did it say?

+Ricardo Camacho LMFAO so i wasnt the only one thought i was being brainwashed huh The clip that was inserted for that half second is actually the same one as the opening. but a man is covering the ner of manners to create the word man. plus the photo is creepy. Thought i was the only one, luckily im not alone, as i thought for sure i was being silly trying to stop at the right second to catch it

+Condor Boss I reminds me a dog leash. Completely useless piece of cloth.

I think it looks pretty good though.

+James Kerr You won't complain again when someone is trying to slice open your chest while wearing chainmail... Just don't let people stab you, that's all.

suyci Neck tie has the opposite effect. Somebody can grab it to use you as a punchbag.

Or you are one step ahead of them and use your necktie as a lasso, and who is the punchingbag then, hm?

+HoldOnToYourHats Disliking something is not bad etiquette.

+The School of Life all of your videos have been fantastic, but it seems there is a growing crowd who resent your noninclusion of other continents and cultures. I feel like this is a bit unfair, as you do in fact explore other cultures. just not nearly as often as your own. I think that this would only be natural, and find others lack of understanding and compassion towards the phenomenon confusing. it's like berating Stephen King because he doesn't write love stories.

Nice of you to respond so fast but this doesn't answer my question I never said that there isn't one 'history of ideas' about Asian countries I said that most should have relevant eastern ideas in them but haven't

+The School of Life Sai Pandit said "most" not "all", and they have a point. Not just Asian POV is missing, but many others. These videos are very Eurocentric... (and very good and thought provoking nonetheless)

+sai pandit Asia had/has no influence on Western manners - just look at how shocked people are when European go to China or Japanese go to France. They are separate worlds but European ideas have been spreading everywhere while Asian culture has had very little influence on the Western world.

What about Africa? What about the Middle East? It's Euro-centered because that's just what it is guys. I don't think you understand just how much more work it would be to investigate the whole world. Just search for it specifically.

+sai pandit Africa also is missing. Egyptian civilization was at hand in this case. I guess eurocentrism is a common thing

In modern days no, also sex is pure based on creation, we said somewhere the line is has to be fun and special, if we act to nature we actualy can jump on evry woman we want as a male

Hennie Hådén thank you

Technically it is, since mannerism are as same as taming a rabid dog, repression to a instinctual needs to the point you can be considered as a human.

If it's about "manners" not "enthusiastic consent" the person is a sexual predator. Normal people are not interested in sex acts that lack mutual enthusiastic consent. Only sexual predators are.

Yeah exactly. That's a lot of historical inaccuracy in this video.

@Katallylos men get assaulted too. Happy?

I think there's a certain arrogance to think that moral attitudes that have existed either dozens, hundreds or thousands of years can ever easily undo millions and billions of years of natural selection where acts like overt displays of sexuality, rape, promiscuity, etc. were successful because they were either advantageous, or at least not disadvantageous to the survival and/or reproduction of the people doing those things. I think we have every responsibility as aware creatures to not violate others and should aspire to a more "well-mannered" society in the sense that we don't just act immediately upon primal urges, but those forces are powerful and have been a part of humanity far longer than any sense of morality, legal system, global humanity identity, etc. The grim reality is that many of our ancestors raped, slept around, engaged in conquest and slavery and many other evils because it kept them alive and led to them having more children (aka putting more of those genes into the population). Evolution doesn't have a moral compass, it's not as simple as the "survival of the fittest" it's really like "Whatever keeps you alive long enough to produce more offspring than your genetic competitors." It's a lot easier to have more kids if you don't ask permission unfortunately. In a modern setting we should be tough on these crimes because they are not necessary to our reproduction and we should encourage a culture of empathy and respect. But 700,000 years ago was a different world and it takes acknowledgement of our genetic foundation to effectively work around it. I think the quest to suppress or eliminate these aspects of humanity in respectable society have to swim with the current of human nature and not against it. Denying the fact that it can be simultaneously human behavior and inhumane behavior means you're approaching a misrepresentation of the problem and not the problem itself. It can be both a primal urge and a deliberate crime, to deny the anthropological trends of our sexual history is to deny a well-researched aspect of our evolution. We don't have to lose the moral high ground just because we admit that certain evils naturally occur when we think we can avoid consequences. The best curbs to our animalistic viciousness has always manipulate our bad habits, natural prejudices and motivations, and guided them to a healthier expression/relief/control. Manners should be part of the conversation in sexual assault. Because quite frankly, with sexual dimorphism as near-universal as it is, most men could physically take sex from most women if they wanted. Societal pressures and the benefits of good-will that maintain when we DON'T just violate each other recklessly do most of the work of preventing mass sexual assault. History shows pretty clearly that when men have all the say they have no problem acting selfishly. We've seen the pendulum swing back and forth before, but there's no one to hold men back from doing what they want they tend to go on blood and sex conquests. Humans in general are social creatures and people behave differently when their friends are cheering them on to go for it "even if she's a little drunk," as opposed to being shamed and told it's not right. This doesn't absolve our responsibility but culture shapes our morality 100% and manners is a big part of culture. If manners are intentional actions to display respect or pleasantries for the sake of good relations, I'd say that could easily cover sexuality. After all, the video talks about how manners can be it's own evil and I think there's a conversation to be had about the "nice guy," who really isn't as opposed the beer-drinker who maybes says some racy shit but ultimately would defend his wife or daughter to the death. People are weird. I just want to clarify that it's not lost on me why it's offensive imply lack of manners is a cause or underlying factor in sexual assault, but I think this is mostly a problem with colloquial v technical language. From a social science perspective, manners absolutely shape our sexual behavior, but when you talk about casual usage of the word, it quickly makes it sound like rape is a form of rudeness, akin to not holding the door open for someone, when it is much worse. I think we can both be right, in a way, and I hope we both take the wisdom and core of each other's message. It's a tough subject that can get hard to talk about productively, but I like reading different opinions and I think this helps people empathize with each other. I do hope though, that people don't think that trying to explain why rape occurs and why it might be a "normal" part of human behavior in the sense that it occurs in all cultures throughout history is a defense or attempt to absolve any of responsibility. I'd love to post a discussion about why men and women have different sexual cultures and how natural selection saw men become more promiscuous and women more relationship oriented, but this post is long enough. I suggest to anyone to read up on the biological and evolutionary aspects of our nature, they are powerful forces but that doesn't mean we can not be better people than our natural urges!

@@chrissiek8706 it's not JUST unmannered to rape women,it's much more than that, same goes for men. I think you missed the point of that comment and only saw "man hating feminist" or something.

Agree. Rape is an expression of power over someone. He may as well start talking about other behaviors that stem from a need for power such as bullying, assault, torture all the way to murder and then start talking about how our manners are what is what is limiting those behaviors and that those manners may well go out of fashion in a hundred years. It really got me when he said that those rapists fell for the idea of "sexual freedom" from the 60s. Sorry, but sexual freedom and liberation is an idea aimed to take away the power of slut shaming that enables sexual predators to get away with their behavior and enable people to talk more openly about what they want and discuss consent more easily. It is not a movement that enables abusive behavior. I subscribed and then quickly unsubscribed.

Please give the timestamp for when this was said?

rowb early He’d have to timestamp the whole video.

@@Sistadelphia The video is specific to western audiences, but at no point was exclusivity claimed.

@@rowbearly6128 Agreed. Most of the video isn't even about the English people.

Indeed, innit?

Nature may not necessarily be 100% behind it, but we see coerced sex all throughout the animal kingdom, today, even in our primate cousins. Of course, females of all species have evolved various strategies to filter out unwanted males' genes, but none of them have ever been foolproof. Therefore, it's probably safe to assume the human state of nature permitted rape regularly. Our legal system is the best protection available yet, and even that's not foolproof. Think of it this way: The default behavior of a child is to follow its innate impulses, and it can learn to suspend gratification through good parenting and socialization. If those influences aren't present, the child will grow into an adult which by default follows its innate impulses. For an adult male, this could mean assaulting a woman whose appearance arouses him, and he wouldn't give it a second thought because he had never been warned about the impact of such behavior.

Seriously, the author definitely had a personal bone to pick there. So much for staying objective. Up until that tirade I was going to save this, but...yeah.

dude of course it’s education if your brought up around that kind of behavior it will be normal not only that but if it’s never taught to your ancestors for generations it will become natural and instinct so I don’t think he’s trying to justify the history of sexual assault just giving the hard truth of people really didn’t care

+DamienZshadow I think that was the point of the video. "Manners are great. No, wait, they're bad. Meh, somewhere in the middle."

I agree but I can imagine the manners being a lot less refined or delicate..Like "If you're going to burp, don't do it in someones face. Turn away and let rip ". lol

I don't think manners would have existed, but there must have been a tacit code, a line you cross at your peril.

They had their own version of manners. They were different but expected and transgressions were punished.

Manners

+Randy Espinoza if you saw it, why do you care if anyone else did? are you seeking acceptance by leaving a comment about something you observed? why? nobody cares.

Bro, I think you are over analyzing a simple comment. Don't bother replying, just go back and read your comment. It come's of very rude.

Randy Espinoza that was the intention. thank you for confirming its success as a comment. good day.

+ROM CHOMPA Congratulations for losing your time doing a stupid comment. Now we all know you are stupid. And rude. :) Good luck in life you are gonna need it.

Manners

4131 111YE I know. I read it.

+Jaqen H'ghar it says manners

***** I'm not retarded. I slow mo'd it and saw it before making the comment.

+Jaqen H'ghar it is about manners

Inhibition is tricky. Those with what neuroscientist Jim Fallon calls warrior genes who manifest sociopathy (however mild or high-functioning to extreme psychopathy) are not going to be influenced by social pressures for manners or what religious cosmologies framed as "sinful" behavior in the same way that sensitive or inherently more empathetic people will be influenced. More rigorous levels of education and pressure may only inspire neurosis in the sensitive and still not be effective at influencing the behavior of those with more Teflon coated sensibilities. Those who actually may need to be less inhibited will pay attention, because they are the ones paying attention at all anyway. How do you influence the rest? Although that being said; education and repetition are indeed powerful and should be encouraged, especially if done in a rational manner. So this project has my esteem for that. To answer the original comment, I agree that The School of Life should address the implication that rape is generally and universally instinctive. That is a huge claim, backed up by limited and unimpressive evidence. I don't think half of humanity is struggling to not act on assumed cave-man instincts, this is ignorant and dangerous bias at work. That assumption is really very harsh toward men. Does the evidence suggest that our Paleolithic ancestors were inherently more violent in their cultures? That they had less respect for women? That is interesting, and the jury is out. Some hunter-gatherer cultures seemed to have a higher respect for women that the Modern West, and many scholars accept as fact that early agrarian cultures were matrilineal. Do we struggle now with a rape culture that is a metastization of Modern troubles, not merely a legacy of "cave-man" genes in a space age world? I think addressing psychopathy should indeed be somewhat encapsulated, not addressed in the same vein as that which applies to society as a whole. The issue is much more complicated and does deserve more discussion, to state the absurdly obvious. Thanks!

Surely it would be folly and fallacious to assume that all possessed violent sexuality back in the day (and by extension today), would it not? Manners helped to temper the behavior of people as well as elucidate on matters of morality. But like matters of morality, the degree to which it applies to guiding the behavior or one depends on person to person (different people, and by extension cultures, believe different things to be right and wrong, although not exclusive to one another such as in Reform Judaism vs Orthodox Judaism). What of criminals who've been subjected to chemical castration? Such criminals have been documented committing future rapes in prison, and studies have shown castration to only slightly impede their impulse to rape. [1] Rape, for many of them, is a psychological tool used to dominate others and feel in control (the matter of which is subjective from individual to individual). The 'lack of inhibition' or other biological explanations go about the assumption that violence and sexual violence are inherent in men and some women, fails to take into account the discrepancies above as well as the inherent empathy that some individuals possess which naturally inhibit and prevent such behaviors. Such an explanation ends up doing more harm than good by committing labels to individuals on the basis of gender generating instances of 'bad faith' (Sartre's definition in which an individual feels confined to their supposed role based on assumptions from society). [1] www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3824348/

"So we should teach them to have better manners but not to respect women as human beings and not sexual objects" The goal of proper manners is for them to respect women as human beings.

I would think it's natural and normal for men to respect women as fellow human beings and not rape them for that reason. I doubt if as relatively recently as 13,000 years ago humans lacked empathy to the extent it would just be usual to act on sexual attractions by routinely forcing people to have sex. Maybe at some early evolutionary stage it might have been like that, but even in many non-human animals there's often AFAIK kinds of courtship behaviour and not just forced sex. So, I'd guess this video over-simplified a bit.

Evolution through socialization

From a western RU-vid channel. Surprised?

Exactly what I thought of

+‫سلمان الراجحي‬‎ Have you thought of doing your own, I'm sure if you did it well school of life would share it

+‫سلمان الراجحي‬‎ They never really developed anywhere else

Buck Shot 15mins is a bit short for world history.

Doesn't exist

@@celt2453 clearly you've never been to japan. would make any european nation look chaotic in comparison

@@deelite19 Haha I was only joking. True that Japanese are very respectful

omoiyari is a universal concept not exclusive to japanese society, with it's trasnlations having its meanings like being considerate, having compasion, feeling empathy etc. qualities everyone needs for a stable society. I would just say that omoiyari is just a Japanese translation of these concepts

why though lol

At least, they weren't getting castrated like with the muslims.

+Francois Lamarre i don't know, as a person who doesn't speak any romance language and is not a native english speaker, i always find it annoying, except for germanic languages of which i speak none as well

+Fefê Torquato Well yes, if people did whatever they wanted with out regard for others. Men would rape every woman they had a fantasy about. And just about everyone has felt like assaulting or even murdering someone at one time or another.

Sexual murder?

John Murray Yes, I understand the point of view, but I still can't agree, specially the use of the word manner for these (as we know today) crimes. It’s a semantic problem I know, but to me manners are habits that may disturb others, but not harm them. People use them to set an hierarchy between the one in a privilege class “who have manners” and the rest of us “who don’t”. And that’s a very risky place to go, is like saying “a sexual predator or murder don’t have manners so obviously was brought up in a unprivileged home”, that’s incredibly wrong of course. And manners/habits can change with time, and something you do today could be a terrible habit in the past, and maybe could be a terrible habit in the future again. In the other hand the right of someone’s individuality, or right to come and go, right to his/hers own body, the right to live, is not something that change, it evolves, it’s not a matter of manners it is human conscious.

Lawrence D. You understood what I meant, I just misplaced the word assault, you got it...

Fefê Torquato I can understand that. However, in the video he does postulate a convincing argument. That the lack of 'sexual manners' in a drug soaked, freely sexual time like the 60's and 70's continued in today's society would be considered sexual assault. But, again, I understand the semantic problem. The word "manners" (although philosophically appropriate) isn't typically used in such a broad way.

+The School of Life I'm an avid follower of your channel, and I hope you only accept it as a critique for future ideas on videos. I'm not a descendant of any empire, but I just appreciate a certain history that is lost and forgone. Especially in the divided times that we live in now, it would be a great contribution from your end to shed light and build bridges on some of the empires of the Orient and their thinkers and philosophers e.g. Avveroes, Ibn Sina, Sankha, Plotinus etc.

+Aym Rao Seconded.

This channel is an aristocrat idolizing, feel good, pretty eurocentric channel. They're great at what they do, don't get me wrong, but that *is* what they are.

+fmlAllthetime It's fine.

+The School of Life Don't be sorry. You should be proud of your European history. Do not let this cultural marxist have a jab at you.

+Acquavallo Maybe TheSchoolOfLife does not think to be proficient enough to talk about these Cultures. 15min is a decent length for a short overview on "European Culture"

+Acquavallo I suppose cave men could count Africa, up until we stopped being cave men at least

Emm the last time I checked Middle East is in Asian

But yeah we want to know the rest of the world, Europe Africa and Asian they are not the same

As much as this channel is good, but its very eurocentric

+HMKfilms360 You savage!

***** :)

you sir, are off the scales

+HMKfilms360 In some countries eating with hand is considered as proper to enjoy the food more. In my country (indonesia) for example

Brurce Muhammad Mecca im from saudi arabia makkah, i know hahah

+CountBifford Perhaps manners are more about considering the sensitivities of peers as opposed to those in power.