I think Americans know how to read the atmosphere, it's just too many people don't care. So many people have the attitude of 'I'm going to have my say no matter how others feel'. Or they just enjoy making people feel uncomfortable (we call them trolls). But it doesn't have any serious long term effect on the person like in Japan.
We Brazilians would have a hard time living in Japan, we are very direct, and we get angry when people drop hints, or when they are not direct. We say "Não dá pra viver pisando em casca de ovo" wich means "It's not worth it living trying not to step on eggshells" but can also be undertood as "It's not worth it living walking on your tip toes". When a brazilian is your friend you got a true friend.
In the USA, we DO also have this sense of decorum too. There's a phrase called "Read the room". The problem is there are so many cultures, personalities, beliefs, and philosophies in America, some people aren't raised to do this. Most people just stay around or gravitate towards people who agree with them. Some people have the attitude that they are always going to be themselves and be straightforward, and they'd rather be around people that aren't insecure and can always be happy for them. Others, on the other hand, do think about others' feelings and want to treat people the way they want to be treated. There are people who call those who always talk about themselves and how happy they are as "self-centered" and "braggart". Personally, I prefer the Japanese way of doing things where you consider other people's feelings. I never start a conversation with how successful I am. I always begin by what I'm working on currently and hope to see success with in the future. This helps everyone in the conversation think of what goals they might be going towards. But if you see someone bragging about getting a job in an American television show, for example, while knowing her friend just lost her's, normally the person bragging is not considered in a good light, and that person is being used to relate to people who know self-centered people like that. I'd also add that while Americans do read the room, how we interpret it and respond to it might be different than someone from Japan. For example, in work culture. In work culture, everyone under the boss, no matter their age, are considered "equal peers" that have to work with one another. Sometimes, a younger person might have been with a company longer than an older person, so that young person would be made responsible for teaching the older person how to do the job. This can only be possible if the younger person is able to tell the older person what to do (which the older person might not like, but has to deal with). The younger person might be better at adjusting to new technology and advancements in the company than the older person. Therefore, the younger person might be the one to teach the older ones. So we are all treated as "equals", even if we wouldn't be "equals" outside of work. With our bosses, no matter how old or young, we speak to them with a certain level of caution and respect. However, if a business is unionized, a boss can't speak disrespectfully to workers either. Therefore, everyone is to speak to one another respectfully. When it comes to whether an idea is good or not, it's usually presented to the boss first in the USA, too. BUT bosses tend to be more interested if others show interest because even the people in the room are potential customers, too. If no one else in the room is interested, the president or boss will believe no one on the outside will buy the product either. So, in the case of US businesses, everyone in the room is presented with the product at once.
Let' make a second part of this Kuki Yomu topic, because your female audience need to know more in terms of love anf relationship 🤦♀️💘 How to read the air in this Position?
Wow Santi! Thanks for picking my question! That was a lot of examples but very helpful in understanding kuki yomu. It seems like you ran out of time, will there be a second part or continuation? I guess in America we would have "reading between the lines" but I don't think we're so hyperaware of how others will think of us either lol Like your example with Kathy and Lisa about jobs, we'd probably cheer and congrats the other despite one of us losing a job. Also the whole who knew more japanese, I don't think we'd even think of being too arrogant but just proud and be casual about it(of course, we'd probably think they're smartasses but ignore it or even show off a bit). It seems like kuki yomu is, as you said, about the public eye and thinking how it would make others feel. It seems quite thoughtful they don't want others to feel down and really goes with the whole caring about the public eye theme. Thanks again, Santi! Hope to hear more!
As an American, I personally would not bring up I got a job and am so happy if I knew a friend just lost their's. I would feel like I'm bragging or self-centered. Even if I knew my friends would be happy for me.
Are you familiar with the term "high sensitive person" I'm one of them so I'm in general able to read the atmosphere only because other people behavior effects me way more deeply than others. So the fact that japanese society is more soft, actually suit me better. There are cases where it does not work, because of high sensitive I get trapped in my own thoughts and problems.
i like watching your japanese love advice and culture tips.. maybe you can do culture tips on weekdays and love advice on weekends. most people have more time to watch on weekends anyway like a normal radio in my city, weekend night specials are usually for those single people to call in to talk to the host haha
Where I live, Lisa would be happy for Kathy because the happiness of ones friends is important. (But I’m 54 so it is probably different if you are younger) I think communication through secondary sources, like email, text and video, has actually made true interpersonal communication difficult because one is not physically present and can therefore be limited in understanding because so many things in communication are lost through a screen.
Hello Santi, Different from others perspective... I have one questions which I'm eager to know it so much... If you happen to see this post please do reply. My question is Is there any tribe or race or group of people called ' Kuki ' in your country, Japan.
🤣 sorry, I stopped recording when I stopped my protein alarm😫 I was shooting this at 9pm and it was nearly impossible to shoot again and upload on time. after that it continues like, "if It's alone its ok to talk. " and as you said Hana 👍
