How I Came Out as Trans at 13 

"We thought you were either gay or this"

I’m crying right now. I want to tell my dad about these things and about pronouns and gender and stuff but he has so much on his hands. Dealing with a teenager as a single dad working a job day and night and only home at 3am and 6pm is hard enough. I’m so scared for him. Im not even worried if he doesn’t accept me because I know he probably will. But I’m so worried about him

"Well, we thought you were either gay or this, we were just waiting on you to tell us" 😂😂 ooof why is this me

Boy! You're so lucky! My mom says that if you're under 16-18, it is most likely a phase.

I’m 14, closeted and really scared. I know my parents won’t be supportive but I also feel like I have to start T soon. I wish I was a cis male

I’m 13, I’ve decided that today is the day I’m going to come out. Maybe I can start of the new year with finally coming out and maybe being accepted by my family

I came out to my mom last night. I’m 13 and I feel less alone.

I'm 15 and absolutely terrified to come out to my family, most of them have, in the past, expressed negative opinions towards transgender folks but I don't know how long I can keep hiding this significant part of myself. I know I'm not going to come out by actually speaking to them - I'll either freeze up and run away or break out into tears and run away - so I've decided that I'm going to go with writing letters/sending messages to everyone, I'm just waiting until I feel comfortable enough to do so, which I hope is soon. I hate having to live like this.

Whoa I'm the first like. I came out when I was 13 too but that was in 2014. I'm mtf. Your family sounds sweet. My family accepted right away except my dad but I don't have much contact with him so I'm fine. :P

I'm 12 and going to come out as a trans boy soon. I think I'm going to tonight, but my mom is a little sick and I don't want to stress her out too much. Edit: This is a little late, but she basically said I was confused. She said I could transition when I am 18 "if" I still feel like a boy.

I tried coming out around 5th grade. Everyone kept telling me it was a phase and everything. That it would go away. Well. 4 years later on ninth grade.... I’m still trans. Either this is a long ass phase or I’m trans. Also people on discord are always like “show me your face” and then they say “oh you’re just a tomboy” yeah.. that is what I believe most of my life. But I’ve come to acceptance even if others haven’t. Also I’m watching this so I can come out to my class as trans. My first thought was to just ask my friends to spread gossip and rumors or start calling me by my preferred name in public. Especially during school

This is great Connor! Hopefully it will give courage to many young people who are trying to get their message out. Hugs always!

I’m only 11, I’ve only told my friends about me being trans. I’m really scared to tell my stepdad because I told him that one of my friends are trans at 12, he said that my friend was too young. I’m pretty sure that parts of my family are supportive so I may come out to them first…

You have a really good family system, support system. I couldn't imagine being in a family where this kind of communication and support happens? Couldn't imagine having so many friends that you'd go door to door. Or all the support. Completely foreign world for me. You are incredibly lucky. Or just working in a collective unit in this way? I didn't know people actually did that. I didn't come out until I was 20 because no good family, no friends, no support. My mom took it bad but after a while, we're good now. 26 and doing ok. Never really came out to anyone, just kind of deactivated my Facebook and live kind of quietly.

i came out when i was (newly) 12. I just texted my mum a really badly written text to her during my lunch time at school (which i spent 3 weeks writing). My mum promptly told my nuclear family and then my extended family. All extremely accepting (to an extent), but i wished i did it better. I also came out to my school via a facebook status. Tbh though i was 12, i would of definitely done it differently now

did i mention ily?? like all ur vids are so helpful

I'm turning 11 this year 11 in a half years of confusion and fear I'm worried I want to tell my parents so badly I don't know what to do but just being called my dead name makes me super uncomfortable I want to spit it out already I cringe whenever I hear my old name and pronouns, I may tell them in a few months or on my birthday this helped so much thank you, Connor.

im planing to come out this October by leaving a letter for my mom and siblings to read while im away on a 4 day DC for school. Im gonna send a playlist of videos as well so they can watch them and learn where im coming from, but watching your videos help a lot with the stress and everything that comes along with coming out. awesome vid, keep it up!

AHHHHHHH IM SO AWKWARD AROUND MY MOM WITH THIS KIND OF STUFF!!! I'VE COME OUT TO MY FRIENDS AND SISTER BUT NO ONE ELSEEEE!!!!!!

I’m so disappointed with myself, 2 years ago I was in year six and I new I was trans. I had a plan to come out so I could enter secondary as a male called tom I told my closest friends they were all like ok cool. I was to scared to call my parents as one of my less close friends said “it’s a phase.” They put me down so low I couldn’t tell my parents, here I am now nobody knows I am trans other than one person. All my friend I grew up with in primary have moved up with me to secondary think it was a phase. I’m at the point we’re I need to tell someone but I can’t I’m scared it’s a phase I scared of there reactions and it’s tearing me apart. I’m putting this out to get help. I am such a lucky person in the facts that as somebody born female I have a deep voice and I am forever greatful. Please really with any tips for coming out or how to safely bind and appear more masculine. And if you have taken the time to read this, thank you and please don’t hate on me.

i just came out yesterday only to my friends they were so supportive and it turns out another one of my friends was trans so im not alone now i havnt came out to my parents yet my name is gonna be pheonix :)

Im 13, and a currently closeted trans girl i think Perfect time to come out!

I’m 13 I’m pretty sure my parents will be supportive I don’t really know but I was thinking about coming out in a few days but I just can’t gain the confidence to

I’m 13, I just told my mother that I want to start Hormone Blockers. She at first was thinking that it was just “being a girl” and that stuff. I explained that it wasn’t and it was something more. She said that she just wants me to be happy and that we’ll look into it. I’m still worried though and I don’t know why.

Man.. wish I was brave enough to come out

the audio/visual effects towards the end were real distracting and i'm not sure what purpose they were meant to serve but I appreciate the story bro- keep it up!

I plan to come out tomorrow by sending a message to my mom, i know the worst i will get might be a "you're too young" which i have got before so its just a matter if trying again, I'll update this comment when ive sent it It went quite well, i texted my mom and we had a chat, she said after christmas I can get counselling to help me figure myself out (not that she was- discouraging me but more that because i am young to help me figure shit out, and theres this youth group near me for LGBTQ+ people aged 11-24 so she's asking about that as well

i am 14 and a closeted ftm i plan to come out to my family next summer i’m not sure how to come out i’ve been searching and watching lots of videos i do know for sure i’ve talked to my school counselor any advice on how to bring it up and come out?

I always feel so much more confident and 'like my true self' when I look more masculine I can literally spend ages just trying to put my hair up to look like a boys then put a hoodie on or a jacket on to hide the rest of my long hair I feel like I am not even in my own body half of the time but like I said I am not really feeling anything I feel numb, for example I literally never cry no matter how hard I try the most I get is a few tears I can watch like something for a whole year and shed a single tear hardly ever when they die even if they are my favourite character. I keep asking my mum if she can take me shopping so I can buy hoodies and stuff but she's to busy sleeping. Makes me a bit uncomfortable saying this but I am like almost a double D in bra size so it's really hard to hide my chests I always wear sports bras cause they keep my chest more secure and a bit more flat but idk. (Like I said I turned 13 end of august) and it's so uncomfortable so I always try to wear oversized clothes but my mum has got me all shirts that show of almost the top of my chest which I really dislike I have tried to be like my friend and dress up more girly but I just don't feel comfortable I'd prefer to stay in hoodies and stuff. half the time I am not thinking and I literally try hide my chest like it's the end of the world if someone realises I have one. (which they already do cause they know I am a "girl". :/ I am so sick of how I feel and how pathetic I am being right now saying all this to people who literally don't care.

I'm 12 and I'm frankly pretty scared to come out, but I'm just going to explode if I can't socially transition soon and I need to tell someone. I can't tell my brother because then my parents might think I'm tryna brainwash him or something, so I'm just gonna tell everybody at once. I was outed when I was younger and it didn't go so well, but maybe it'll go better this time since I'm older. I don't know. I'm just gonna do it. I'll update when I do, and I'll tell you guys how it went. Planning on saying something later tonight, but I might chicken out (again) so idk.

I texted my sister who I thought I could trust that I was trans and so she told my mom even though I told her not to so I get jealous of people who are able to come out to their parents at a chosen time

Wow I'm 13 and I'm the closet. I'm ftm. I'm terrified to tell my dad but I am very confident that I'm a dude. So I think I will come out soon. I'm so scared and happy that it will be over.

I'm thinking of coming out, I now my mom and probably dad will support me, but my grandparents are super transphbic and homeaphbic. They stopped buying hints ketchup because they had a supporting clerical

Can I copy your letter please just for my parents as I can’t think of what to say please well some of it

I just wanted to say that your an inspiration, I'm 12 years old and I'm turning 13, and I plan on coming out as transgender, to my family. Could you please give me tips😥😣😍

I am currently living as a girl but I don't feel comfortable as a girl. I used a different e-mail and set up a male Facebook profile and sent friend requests to some of my friends. I have a church family and they are very forgiving however they are also very religious. I don't know what to do since the strain of me acting as a girl is weighing me down. It's literally killing me and the only thing I can think of is to stop going to church until I am mostly transitioned but that would also mean me cutting off ties to a lot of people who have helped me. I have no clue what to do. If you have any advice I would be open to it.

Did you send the message to your parents? Or did you come out in person, I don’t think I quite got that and I just wanted to know if it’d be bad to come out to my parents like that. I’m ftm transgender, 14 years old. This video is really inspiring and thank you for making it.

I don't know how to do it I'm having a panic attack just thinking about it. Note I belive I am male to female.

What should I do if my parents are tranphobic?

This helped me a ton. Thank you. Im coming out in about 5 minutes

i'm coming out later today at 21 lol. hope my mom doesn't kick me out..

I AM 11 I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO

I have no idea how I managed to do it I but I came out to my mom a week after I realized I was transgender obviously from my profile picture here I'm not transitioned yet but I will hopefully be able to see a psychiatrist about this later when all of this Corona stuff is over

Im seriously debating if i should tell my friend. I moved to a new school and successfully passed as a male but people use he/him around the friend. He keeps correcting them that its She/her. He likes men and i told him i was gay so hes even more confused. I even told his other friends i was female..im kinda scared because he might think im weird or might not forget to use my pronouns- im fighting myself whether to tell him tomorrow..I’ll update-

I’m gonna do a family therapy meeting and try coming out to my mum and dad.. I’ll update y’all when it happens

Are you from Ireland ? Or your parents ? Clocked the Irish surname

Uh, i’m 11 but i’m not sure if i should tell my parents because they’ll tell me “it’s just a phase” or “the internet is confusing you”.

I need help i came out to my parents and they my dad disapproves and my mom plays and says "oh shor u are" im 13 all most 14 and im starting to feel like my family thinks im lying but I did get my mom to choose from three names Justin Tyler and Josh she chose Tyler but she never called me yet nor does she use my pronouns he him I really need your advice

*I am 14 old. and am a male trans, i am planning to come out to my parents next month; I'm sure they won't support me, cause my parents are VERY religious.* *I really want to tell them before, but I am afraid...*

I came out when I was 13 as well but only this year

How to come out to your parents, leave this video playing in your living room and then go to your friends house

Your mom is the best.

Im going to come out as trangender nonbianary to my family on my 13th birthday (11 months from now) im really nervous but im excited (at that point ill be out to my freinds)

I'm only here in a totally cis way