HOW THE NARCISSIST SEES YOU 

It's not that the narcissist can't find good people. It's that they have to project their ill feelings, ultimately about themselves, onto the other person. You are not allowed to be good. If they allow you to be good, that means they must be less than.

I think ppl need too realize that not only do they not see or hear you .. they think totally different than we do

Good job! They also like to isolate people so they can have better control of people.

I tried so hard to convince myself that my ex was not a Narcissist but this video describes her almost perfectly, it's scary ...

Sadly, I realized that I've been married 12 years to this user & abuser. He abruptly left in May to shack up with the secretary from his work. I didn't see it coming, he was still leaving me love notes daily before work. They know exactly what they are doing & it's evil 😈

This video is spot on. With the narcissist, today you can be the hero, and tomorrow you’ll be the zero - and that will cycle repeatedly over the years with them.

Yes she was using my resources to impress every one around

No wonder I saw that peculiar drunken look on his face just a few weeks into the relationship. And he told me he was "addicted" to me. I didn't know what to think. On one hand, it was somewhat flattering, but on the other, I was starting to feel like I was in over my head. I was not really comfortable because it was an odd remark I could not entirely brush off. So the next week I said I felt addicted to him, but I didn't mean it. I just said it because I thought I was supposed to. Actually, I was starting to feel lost. Another word to watch out for is the word "special.". If someone new tells you that you make them feel special, or that the relationship is special, it's time to back off, at very least. Narcissists love feeling "special" far more than normal people, and they may actually use that word. Wanting to be special the way they want to be special is a mark of infantilism. They're in the process of turning you into their parent. And they hate that parent while being obsessed with them. Narcissists are twisted, weird and abnormal. They're also a dead weight and liability on the rest of humanity.

I’ve watched tons of videos on narcissists. this is one of the best videos and channels out there

Insane ! .

As much as I know about this topic, YOUR video made me FINALLY see and understand what that means. When ppl say the narcissist doesnt see YOU. You made me get it!!!! They see the fantasy person in THEIR mind!!! They project that fantasy upon us as the identity that THEY see!!! WoW!!!!!!!! How sick and self absorbed!!! So self absorbed that they dont even see their spouse or partner!!! Thanks for this video sis!!!!!!

You deserve so many more Subscribers. Peace

13:41 I would have a really great day. I would have had NO interaction with the narcissist ALL day long. Then I’d come and only _listen_ to absolutely EVERYTHING she had to and NEVER disagree with ANYTHING. Then she say, “I WAS having a really great day until this evening.” That basically it was only since I got home did her day start to go sour. It was apparently just my mere presence that was causing her universe to go dark. I wouldn’t even say one word about myself or how my day went. After me addressing everything she would nitpick me about, she had finally run out of triggers. It was now just my existence that ruins her day.

This is so spot on! You give them the moon and the stars and they are mad you didn't get the sun too.

And even if you serve them perfectly in every way, like you said, they still will want more. No matter how hard you try, expect to feel like a failure when you’re w a narc. Being w a narc becomes very predictable.

After searching 20 years ago for answers to why he acted the way he did, I came up with nothing but mid-life crisis and cyber romance addiction as explanations. Even starting four years ago when another incident caused me to seriously question what was going on with him. I started finding more and more videos about narcissism. The pieces of the puzzle started coming together. But, a lot of the videos were so abstract to me, it was difficult to put my mind around it to understand what I'm experiencing and why he is acting and thinking differently than what I assumed. For some reason, it took me four years to find you and I am binge watching all your videos. Your down to earth explanations and real life examples make so much sense and are relatable. I think of you as a good, wise friend. Thank you so much for the time and thought you put into these insightful videos!! Please use an algorithm so more people can find you on RU-vid!!

The feeling creeps up on you as you get to know the Narcissist - that they can't see you or appreciate your uniqueness. So weird. He spoke about his exes a lot but never gave a sense of who they were as people. They were described in very surface terms, such as their physical appearance or their status. Big red flag.

I've heard that numerous time. When addressing the narcissist behaviour and asking questions about it. He claims it feels like someone is out to get him. My thing is if you feel that way then you know 💯 that you are doing something wrong and you to correct it. He claimed I was the one pretending. Self projection much.They also see everything that you do as nothing special. It's just normal to them. On the otherhand is spectacular because they are nicest people in the whole wide world. I think not😒.

This is so accurate and the best description of the situation. Right before things finally ended he came out and said “The problem is that you think you’re indispensable”. No. The problem is you think I’m not. When you need someone in your life and care about them, they are indispensable to you.

This is exactly what I have experienced.. it took me 27 years to undo this I never knew and always wanted to know why I was being treated I'm this matter.. I looked for for answers and couldn't find them and I'm talking yearr thank you.. I would love to speak to you I'm actually writing a book.. I would love and want to help someone this has to STOP because of this horrific sickness people are taking their lives men woman because they don't understand.. if I can help someone each and everyday. And I pray that I can.. take your power back and it's never too late and it's definitely not your fault.. thank you so much for this video.. ❤

You're awesome!

The timeline is an unmistakable tell, if you know how narcissism is predictable. The darker the disorder the quicker it shows itself. The rage, projection and intentional triangulation are not one offs. It is a boundary test. After your knowledge base is aquired, the overt, combo overt-covert doesn't have a chance going undetected. A cerebral covert may require a little more time but the toxic actions of Dark Persuasion indeed are there. Passive aggression, subtle off the wall humiliations and carrot chasing designed to keep you off kilter and in servitude. It may be better to have a full spectrum far end sociopath the first time, provided you survive. Any lesser narcopath or toxic interpersonal exploitation attempt is discerned quickly with the margin of possible error acceptable if it means your well being vs. arguing internally with your intuition. You become a cognitive dissonance free zone. If it means no longer associating in certain groups, gatherings, people, so be it. Some of common cultural locations, organizations are dens of optical deception. Your perception should not be looking for it in paranoid mode, but not ignore it once it cannot be unseen.

This video is on a topic that when communicated beautifully, as you have done, brings peace to the person who lived through the exquisite confusion and pain. Knowing how they see you un-does the fantasy they paste over you and themselves, that you cling to (because reality is incredibly hard to accept) that keeps you in false hope and optimism and wraps you in a spider web of inertia.

I love your channel. The way you’re able to put the narcissist under the lens. So humorous.

This was eye opening for me. Im married to a narcissist and have been diagnosed as co-dependent myself. As I get older though I feel that Im getting tired of being someones savior. I feel my life is passing me by. My spouse, due to ill health has decided to crawl into a ball and do a woe is me move. Where as Im looking to enjoy some of the things I never could due to having all this responsibility from care taker. I know the more I assert my freedom to do things the nastier things will become. But its a path I must take for me. I believe that due to my honesty about my past it allowed my spouse to take advantage of me and try to mold me into his fantasy person. Ive fallen off that pedestal for sure.

Thank you for your content on this subject. You are definitely one of may favourite RU-vidrs on this topic. I am finding the betrayal and constantly throwing his new life with the new supply in my face the hardest to heal from. I think I could heal faster if I could go complete no contact but due to shared children it’s not possible. More content on this would be awesome. I will be waiting for your next upload. Thank you again !

Now that the world knows much more about narcs, the weired thing is that it continues to grow, more narcs everydays, because of selfies, egoism celebrated, infinite swipes possibilities, etc. In a world of replacability and individual priority, knowing the destructive side of it doesn't stop anything. I think society has turned itself in a big narc factory. I don't know why, I see how for a part, but I'm sure it's impossible to shut down. Sorry for my pessimistic comment but I'm very concern about the cultural catalysis of this pathology. It's not only a mind problem of certain people, it has become a civilisation model.

great, great, great !

WOW, THIS IS SO BIZARRE, I KNEW MY SISTERS DIDN'T SEE ME, IF THEY SAW YOU THEY WOULDN'T TREAT YOU LIKE A 2 YEAR OLD, ONE DOES THIS, THE OTHER LIKE YOU'RE NOTHING, I CAN'T STAND BEING AROUND THEM ANYMORE, ALSO WHY THEY NEVER APPRECIATE ANYTHING, DON'T SAY THANKYOU, ETC. ETC.

it's sooo true ! God bless you !

My soon to be ex spouse used to say he hated my vehicle (2022 Hybrid CRV AWD) because it made a weird sound, didn't have enough power, weird dash controls, etc... but when we'd go somewhere where his teen son's friends would need a ride or strangers who were professionals would see us arrive, he wanted to take my car and be the one driving it!!!!! Just one example of a catalogue of hypocricies. Never grateful for the nice things, not to mention people in their life.

Such a great and accurate video, thank you! The fishing/bait analogy is particularly resonant and something that is very hard to come to terms with even over time.

Excellent video👍🏽 You hit the nail on the head. 🔨 You nailed it again! 🎯 💯

Hey happy Tuesday I hope you've been doing great ☺. I AM officially healed from that situation I told you about (regarding that female narc I told you about who smeared me). I am SO glad I understand that as long as I never expose her, she won't smear me unprovoked 😁🙏🏿🙌🏾

Very great explanation on how they view us. Exactly what happened to me in the past, and I was wondering what I did so wrong & broken-hearted. ❤ so true that you cannot be this perfect god they want us to be. Thanks for sharing. I will try to share it as clear as you did 👍

Thanks so much for this video and for all of your videos. The information is very helpful and informative I greatly appreciate you. Thank you for sharing your knowledge on narcissistic people.

wow, thank you ⚘

Great video. Very insightful. Very relatable... Thank you!

Definitely continue with these types of videos.. many blessings 🙏❤😊 ty

This is exactly to a tee that happen to me. Almost like you had psychic powers.

Amazing insight. Well explained in an area I haven’t heard addressed.

i look back and the whole thing was about some fairytale in her head that turned in to how much she could hurt me.

This is all so true!

No Foreal

Excellent explanation. Wished i cd hv known yrs ago

it is 💯 my husband

yeap i feel like a mullet 🐟🐬

They are offerings help to you but they are not at all. Thay are u using you and you don't see it. You think they love you but thay don't. I. No. Heart broken I'm. It not right at all just go that it get out good luck to all 🍀😘

then if they trap you in a relationship with promises and a baby and you escape they want you to chase them and beg for what the child needs. Put him on child support and of course he’s resentful and things not seeing our baby is going to hurt me.. I never knew peace like this❤

Is it wrong for me to have expected empathic behavior , in other words , that she owed me to show compassion ?