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how to get over someone you never dated

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✨All other links - beacons.ai/man...
Chapters:
04:18 - red flag: when you are in your convincing energy
06:01 - step 1: stop talking about him
07:26 - step 2: stop letting men get away with subpar behavior
09:53 - step 3: be less delulu in ways that harm you
12:38 - step 4: keep dating
Are you tired of feeling rejected by men who don't invest in you? Do you find yourself pining over someone you never dated, planning your wedding and naming your kids with him? Have you been letting men get away with subpar behavior? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then this episode of the Spoiled Girlie Support Group podcast is for you!
Join our host, Elle, as she shares valuable insights and strategies on how to overcome rejection from men who don't invest in you. As a self-sufficient, market-driven girlie, Elle knows that it's important to set high standards and find success-minded men whose values align with yours. She shares actionable tips on how to avoid delusional thinking and stop fantasizing about what could be, and start focusing on what is.
In this episode, you'll learn about the importance of being in your discernment and curating your social media feed to benefit your life. Elle emphasizes the dangers of comparing yourself to others and how it can lead to a self-loathing cycle. She also touches on the importance of being for f’ing real and not expecting princess treatment from a man who has not historically given you princess treatment.
Elle encourages listeners to have goals and aspirations but to learn to honor what they have today and be realistic about what is possible in their relationships. She emphasizes that dating is not about convincing a person to like you, especially if you're a spoiled girlie. Instead, dating as a spoiled girlie is all about choosing the man who is head over heels for you. If you as a spoiled girlie have to convince a man to like you, then he's not the one.
So, if you're ready to turn your pain into profit, tune in to this episode and discover how to date the spoiled girlie way. Set high standards, find success-minded men, and get that bag while securing your own bag. Don't forget to like, comment, and subscribe for more content like this!
keywords: rejection, self-sufficient, market-driven, high standards, success-minded men, values, get that bag, securing your own bag, curating your social media feed, comparing yourself to others, dating as a spoiled girlie.

Опубликовано:

16 авг 2024

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Комментарии : 536

@red6hot1913 Год назад

The BEST advice. Nothing a man says means anything until it's in your hand 👏🏼

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

100%

@Kille483 11 месяцев назад

I don’t get it?

@lea-fl6hn 11 месяцев назад

@@Kille483same i dont get it someone can explain?

@brunchbaetrenta 11 месяцев назад

@@lea-fl6hn I will try, but men love to “say” that they will do this and that to get you excited and to get you to be on their side. But the thing is, once you’re excited about him you will be more likely to do what he wants, and he can do what he wants before actually investing. She is saying that you should try waiting until he is *actually* doing what he says before you get excited and invested. I hope that makes some kinda sense.

@lea-fl6hn 11 месяцев назад

@@brunchbaetrenta omg ty smmm

@ma4308 Год назад

Why do we women do this? Never like someone who doesn’t like you

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

perioddddd

@Myatheroses 9 месяцев назад

Because trauma. Some of us didn’t have good fathers who taught us how to receive love from a guy.

@hp2546 9 месяцев назад

@@Myatheroses There are people who can also learn from mothers as well. Not just fathers. Just as you stated some of us did not have good father. What if that person did not have good fathers but good mothers. This works in a vice versa way as well. People just need one of the above. Any women can be good mother figure and any man can be good father figure.

@sadiemakesmesmile 8 месяцев назад

if you did not have a good father and your mother stayed with him, she would not be a good role model to follow either, no matter how supportive.Women of past generations were more likely to stay with bad men because of marriage norms & circumstances. Also, yes any person CAN be a good parental figure but most arent, and you will be delulu trying to turn them into that. @@hp2546

@Snowhite-tx4sm 8 месяцев назад

We can't control our heart.

@natasa3412 Год назад

The ones you never dated are so much worse to get over just because you don’t know them so you give them all the good traits in your head🥲

@stargirl.lifeee Год назад

I can relate.

@samsara545 Год назад

There’s an explanation for this in psychology. Our fantasies are more emotionally charged exactly because we never faced reality. That's why platonic love exists as well. It’s easier for your mind to project your fantasies on someone you never had a relationship with, due you never saw their downsides, than on someone you know because knowing someone is about acknowledging their negative traits.

@stargirl.lifeee Год назад

@@samsara545 Ohhhhhhh ok

@hp2546 9 месяцев назад

@@samsara545 I can give an example on who I fantasize about. I fantasize about that photography woman at a 3 Day event. I attend a conference and admire her beauty from afar. I don't know much about her. I only see her name tag but I prefer not to mention her name on youtube because I keep my crush confidential. I attend that event for a day and see that woman for a day. I only keep her image in my head. I don't even date her and I don't interact with her. I barely know her and she barely knows me. If she sees me leave, she would say thanks for coming. That is an environment where everybody does not pay attention to me which means solitude life for me. I normally respect people who gives me solitude life. So I never see her negative traits because I was never part of her life. So I never faced reality. I admire from afar and fantasize about her and no relationship with her.

@lucydubois3865 8 месяцев назад

Facts

@chokenbako890 Год назад

The moment I stopped being pickmeisha, the moment that no man stayed in my life fr. Now I'm remembering my value, I have zero man interested in me. It's a painful pill to swallow but it's necessary. Thank you for your message bestie 💗✨

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

@teresai1877 Год назад

Think of it like this. Instead of lame men wasting your time, now you are free you to meet a great guy.

@jamibaker769 Год назад

Pickmeisha 😂

@_InsertName_ 11 месяцев назад

Sameee!! I have lost my interest in all these.

@pvinixje6852 10 месяцев назад

Same and I’m enjoying the single life

@larosenoirek2197 Год назад

Please listen. I wish I knew her in my 20’s 30’s I am 41 here taking advice from a wonderful soul. Listen to what she is saying it will save you 20 years. I can see all the mistakes I have done and thanks to her.

@GoddessVibesVonnie Год назад

I’m 34 and said the same thing 💅🏽 GO OUT THERE AND WIN LADIES 🎉🎉🎉

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

🥺thank you for sharing

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

@audreyandrea460 11 месяцев назад

I’m 42. I love knowing that there was nothing wrong with me for wanting men to provide and dumping the ones who don’t. I’ve been dumped by about 3 men, but I dumped around 50 men and allowed the majority of those 50 to think that they dumped me. I became more and more delulu. I traveled to New York and Nashville and found that men weren’t willing to provide there either, so I started disappearing and made a delulu Home Depot daddy out of several low investment men by using them for different purposes. None of them are good enough to date, so I haven’t had sex in years, but I’ve put that energy into staying beautiful. Now I’m working on refining my marketable skills to make myself look like a high achiever so that I can attract a high achieving man. I like high achieving men because they are busy and they will let me make the domestic space my own to care for. My younger sister married a man who likes to be at home and their house is full of all his stuff and the decor he likes. The whole house is a man cave. It’s pretty gross.

@SpiritualPsychDecoder 11 месяцев назад

True. I’m 40

@giulianag.3095 7 месяцев назад

Stayed 8 months in a situationship with a guy that I have no clue where his house is HAHAHAH, it's so ridiculous. Although he was such a gentleman and we did pretty cool things together, he has a daughter and a bunch of ex lovers, he didnt want a relationship and said I was pressuring him and he was "deeply traumatized". Days after the "break up", while I was crying my eyes out, he was with another chick 🤡💩

@hp2546 7 месяцев назад

This whole thing means he was not ready for a committed relationship. He only do casual relationship for a time being. I mean look at how this situation is. He has a bunch of ex lovers and not ready for any commitment. He only wants casual hook up. So you could of said to him not to worry, I only want to be fwb with you. Lets just do casual hookup. That way, there is no pressure for him. I am sure this other chick she was with only gave him casual sex.

@Dinaziva 3 месяца назад

Ce n'était pas un gentleman. Un gentilhomme ne fait pas ce qu'il a fait.

@annemarie7203 2 месяца назад

Ugh exactly the same that happened to me, I had a situationship of 8 months with a guy who wanted to have a relationship with me, made me believe that he wanted the LDR and I’d be the last girl he wants to be with. He was going to visit me until time has passed that I felt it was just being put off because he was saying he didn’t have the money yet to get a ticket to fly and see me. Until I decided I was going to spend my vacation in his city so I can meet him at the same time. Our meeting went well and thought everything he showed me was real. Then just about 3 weeks after he changed his mind and can’t do LDR and then days after he told me that he admitted that he’s already talking to another girl so just imagine the betrayal I felt and pain after all that time I spent 😔 but good riddance

@hp2546 Месяц назад

@@annemarie7203 By looking up situationship, situationship is a romantic or sexual relationship that is undefined and noncommittal. People in a situationship are more than friends but less than committed romantic partners. That would of meant you 2 did reach to a point where you had sex. You 2 did get into a friends with benenfit relationship until you decided you no longer want casual relationship. If you aren't into casual relationship, this situationship is not for you. That proves that he most likely wanted to cheat. If you look at this record. It is 8 months. So that may be a sign that it is time to break up with him. It is clear you did reach a relationship level where you need to get out. So don't let him give you false hope for a relationship. Chances are, you will be forced to share him with the rest of the women.

@khaiabigail5508 Месяц назад

He don't deserve u girlie he don't deserve a proper relationship but u do❤ may ur next man good & have proper commitments

@healingpoisonbreak9984 Год назад

Tbh ive always wanted a man who loves me a bit more than I love him, and i gave up on that because i was made to believe that I was insecure and I should ask for equality, but tbh,like you said, the world is not perfect, and as woman im automatically vulnerable, so I deserve a man who loves me more than I love him❤

@godimeanshibusawa.6520 Год назад

I am turning 16 this year, and I found your channel last week. I am happy I did, I am preparing for my future.

@sheslimitless 9 месяцев назад

Good for you! Excellent. If I was your mother I would be so proud of you!!

@hp2546 9 месяцев назад

Once you listen to this youtube channel, got to let go of high school traditions. I mean based on how high school traditions are built, it does not give you room to take your time to know people and tend to expect you to do the chasing. I mean in high school, they have a tradition such as hurry up and find a romance partner so you have someone to take out to a prom. They wanted students to buy tickets and go to a prom. So high school has this tradition where if you want to date that person, you have to come out of your comfort zone. If you take this advice from this video, it is about letting go of a person you have a crush on. So once you go for this video's advice, you cannot go by the high school tradition's way.

@and93077 9 месяцев назад

Yes, I’ve been introducing this channel to my 15 yr old daughter! This young lady is so wise beyond her years🙂

@hp2546 9 месяцев назад

@@and93077 A good parent there because teaching your child not to be desperate is a way to make her learn to accept the correct type of people. I know high school is not going to teach students to take their time to know people which means it won't teach students to be comfortable in solitude life before making friends. High school's tradition would have a way to force people to be social so therefore, socializing would normally be under peer pressure. So it is clear you aren't that desperate for your daughter to go to a prom. High school wants students to compete for dating so that the school makes money. This video you introduce to your daughter was meant to teach your daughter to be her own culture instead of the school's culture.

@sadiemakesmesmile 8 месяцев назад

As a teacher, not all high schools are like this. Your comments say more about your own experience and what you felt you didnt get. But I originally wanted to comment to encourage the poster to stay true to her values regardless what everyone else is doing, because this channel does set you up a lot better than most places about how to deal with dating in real life and the gender inequalities in existence, which some of us women have taken a lot of time and heartbreak to learn on our own.. @@hp2546

@jadeayla7548 5 месяцев назад

"You will forever be in your convincing energy."

@tarcbarbosa Год назад

I loved how aware you are about gender inequality when talking about this subject. I'm being delulu but daammn you're so right. Thank you for this video, sis!!!

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

🙏🏽🙏🏽ty bestie

@ilonat8373 Год назад

I can't! I would rather fantasy about a man rather than dating one...Unfortunately all men in my life brought me only pain and disappointment. I would like to imagine a "good man" that exists only in my head.

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

🥺🥺

@joannafernandes2350 Год назад

And you will get it 🫵🏻🤞🏻 nobody can beat consistent imagination

@hp2546 10 месяцев назад

Having fantasy is good because that means you have no responsibility to please a person, you don't deal with their whining, you don't deal with rejection, you don't deal with break up knowing that there has been no relationship to begin with.

@hp2546 9 месяцев назад

I can give an example on who I fantasize about. I fantasize about that photography woman at a 3 Day event. I attend a conference and admire her beauty from afar. I don't know much about her. I only see her name tag but I prefer not to mention her name on youtube because I keep my crush confidential. I attend that event for a day and see that woman for a day. I only keep her image in my head. I don't even date her and I don't interact with her. I barely know her and she barely knows me. If she sees me leave, she would say thanks for coming. That is an environment where everybody does not pay attention to me which means solitude life for me. I normally respect people who gives me solitude life. Since you did say you rather fantasize a man then to date them, then it fits the theme of staying in solitude life because in solitude life, you only fantasize.

@sadiemakesmesmile 8 месяцев назад

This probably means that is your season for doing so. Living in fantasy helped me a lot to be single, as before that I was a serial monogamist who couldnt be on my own. After I suffered a serious case of unrequited love, I wrapped myself up in my own fantasy blanket, and have gotten used to single life! And actually learned to love myself and date myself instead. Fantasies are a crutch we sometimes need to get to the next point in our lives.

@LadyMarigoldWithers 8 месяцев назад

4 years I’ve been delulu over one guy who barely gives me the time of day (that truth just made me break slightly). Definitely feeling the pain and not much else right now but have finally stepped it down and am preparing to let go. I needed to hear this 🙏

@candyxoxo19 8 месяцев назад

Did you let go?

@LadyMarigoldWithers 8 месяцев назад

@@candyxoxo19⁠⁠tapering off, I stopped any intimacy with him in the summer but the flirting has picked up again lately so I had a good chat with him about how he can’t keep sending mixed messages while also not wanting to be in a relationship with me as he knows that’s what I want. I explained I may not be able to remain friends in this situation. He apologised and said he had his own issues but no response when I asked about whether he intended to try and fix them 🙄. Bottom line, he just doesn’t care enough about me and is happy with his status quo (I don’t think there’s anyone else and he’s been on his own for 10 years so very set in his ways) which is fine but no more initiating will be coming from me anymore. I feel sad as we get on so well and easily but it obviously isn’t the right man when the effort isn’t reciprocated. Will probably retreat and lick my wounds for a good while, figure out some other things to try and improve my social life, he has been my only friend here so pretty daunting to have no one and making friends with women has been so difficult so far as they don’t seem interested or have their own group already 🫤

@mynameisyamell187 7 месяцев назад

Been there. Those type of crushes are never worth it.

@anonim34025 Месяц назад

how does it going?

@LadyMarigoldWithers Месяц назад

@@anonim34025 I lowered contact and then he started showing up, doing things he’d promised to before and I got attached again. Then he went cold again. We are both rubbish at communication so I’m writing out how I feel/what I need/what I want to say to him atm. Ultimately if he wants no kind of formal relationship then I need to move on but we have been good friends mostly so I don’t know how I’ll find the strength to give that up. The thought of not seeing him again makes me feel sick but I will never meet anyone new and possibly better suited while he is still in my life. Or he might agree to give it a shot. Only one way to find out I guess…and I keep putting it off because I think I know what the answer will be 😞

@brunoqnzbk7891 3 месяца назад

I wanted someone in the recent past, and he ended up going with someone else. The more I got to see his "character," I realized I was better off. He is her problem and NOT A PRIZE. 😊

@annemarie7203 2 месяца назад

Same I felt betrayed and played when he admitted he’s already talking to another girl after an 8 month situationship of him wanting to be in a relationship with me. It just shows how much he truly valued me and the time we spent 😔

@brunoqnzbk7891 2 месяца назад

@@annemarie7203 You're better off. No integrity is a deal breaker.

@annemarie7203 2 месяца назад

@@brunoqnzbk7891 I was blindsided and it was painful what he did but I realize now that I’m actually better off in the long run

@annemarie7203 2 месяца назад

@@brunoqnzbk7891 it did hurt what he did but I was blindsided and I do realize now that I’m better off in the long term

@annemarie7203 2 месяца назад

@@brunoqnzbk7891 It did hurt what he did but I was blindsided and now I realize I'm actually better off in the long run

@stephanienelly90 8 месяцев назад

We named the kids… now he’s a ghost. I’m so embarrassed 🫠

@Tee-Star 6 месяцев назад

This is so funny and sad. Don't stay embarrassed...carry on like a Queen ❤

@stephanienelly90 6 месяцев назад

@@Tee-Star thank you. He’s faded memories now, thank God❤️

@catchmeintherye2102 7 месяцев назад

“Bestie wake UP” is my new fav line!

@suchaleelim Год назад

You are right. When I went out with a man, I felt drained. At the end of the meeting, I can barely talk and stay awake.

@Harshitadevarakonda Год назад

i am a college going student and i tried making girl friends but everyone turned out to be toxic. The only friends i have are guy friends, from which 2 of them turned out to be toxic too. So i totally cut them off. You know mental health is more important than drama and getting drained. Even though i've other guy friends who are very supportive and help me grow in a positive direction, i'm missing female friends. Literally female friendships are everything.

@sejal02 Год назад

Same and am 21

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

🥺🥺

@FoundSheep-AN Год назад

Majority of female you consider your friend would gladly backstab you if you get with a high value man , or if you get some great job or some other opportunities, well your so called female friends will gladly take what you have. “Best friends” sleep with the husband of their “best friend” and so on… So don’t idealize female friendships. A lot of women are pickmes, they value amore a stranger male than their own kids, so they would gladly backstab you. Majority of people are backstabbers and toxic… to trust them you have to see if they at least have a set of morals they adhere to… Enjoy your college experience and try to not depend neither on boyfriends (at least not until they propose a marriage to you ) nor girlfriends

@hp2546 10 месяцев назад

If you go to college, you must not make it your primary goal to social. Think about this. You already experience how toxic they can be. They can also take advantage of people who is desperate for a relationship. To make a good impression, at least focus on studying. I mean primary goal of college is to get some educational achievement at some point or at least pass a class. Focusing on your education is also part of your mental health too because if none of them turned out to be good friends, you still got your education to back you up. There can be times that if you don't find good friends, you settle for solitude life. People uses solitude life to study. If you become needy, this is how they look down at you.

@tamagotchi22 6 месяцев назад

Every dating woman needs to listen to this very energetic reminder served straight up 🤩

@Anna-ro1he Год назад

Thank you so much for this! I needed this after a 7 year situationship with my best friend. Got left for someone else a year ago. Feeling extremely motivated after this!

@vikgrisel Год назад

i met a guy in my institution where i study and he ask me on a date but with the condition that we were gonna see each other after our exams.... i waited for him 2 months, i always started the conversation... he barely talk to me and ((sometimes)) he wrotes "you are cute" "we have to go out on a date" i wasted 2 months of my precious time on a man who had the audacity to write "you are not my priority" "i'm very busy" I just cut him off, nobody plays with my time and my emotions.... and at the same time he was bragging with his friends about we liked each other but he NEVER do something... his words don't had value it's exhausting, be carefull with this type of men, your time is precious, don't waste your energy on someone who doesn't care about you he has the intelectual capacity, a very smart guy, he has a great job, but he will never understand a woman. This type of men see women as things in the backgroud, they don't appreciate nothing.

@hp2546 3 месяца назад

Your life does fit the theme of the title. Letting go of someone you never dated. I mean he asked you out on a date and he ended up not dating you. He did the chasing and chose to play hard to get. Look at what he is doing, he asked you out and yet he refused to take responsibility. He wanted to act like he never did the chasing and making excuses of being busy. If he wanted to be busy, he should of been honest from the start instead of stringing you along. So technically, you rejected him and decided it is time to let him go and move on with your life. If that relationship never started, then it does fit the title of this video.

@shinobipanda2331 9 месяцев назад

Girl you somehow managed to describe the exact situation I was in. It hurts a ton to know that he almost liked me enough, but he wasn't willing to put in the effort at the end of the day. But looking at it this way is going to make a world of difference to me. You're the girlie I really needed to hear from so thank you 😭😭

@hp2546 9 месяцев назад

There are difference between liking you and falling in love with you. All you can do is earn the person's respect but not love. I assure you, earning a person's respect is good enough. That term he almost liked you is more like he will like you but not date you. He might like you but not in love with you. He can like you but still want to keep the relationship platonic. As long as you get to his good side, that is good enough.

@LadyMarigoldWithers 8 месяцев назад

I feel ya, it does hurt so much, moving on slowly myself

@gracenielsen9424 6 месяцев назад

I need a better self esteem for sure. It really makes me depressed how low my self esteem is

@laurenjackson2810 3 месяца назад

This video needs to be on REPEAT for the girlies who experience this. Especially those who experience limerence, are insecure, have daddy issues, etc. This video is the best advice! 👏🏾 When she said you’ll forever in pursuing energy because he’s not pursuing you; is that the life you want? Whoa 👏🏾💖

@Adi-sm7bs Год назад

Universe please just take all these men back it took me 5 months just to get over one.please don’t destined me another one I couldn’t take it anymore.

@GenesisLaurel 6 месяцев назад

Limerence is one big bitch. Trauma work, research and subconscious reprogramming will get you far. Knowledge is power. Rooting for everyone watching this video and reading this comment. 💝

@EuridesCardoso 2 месяца назад

Yep !!!!! 💝

@astrosag5101 10 месяцев назад

I think you have the perfect balance of humour, seriousness, and lightheartedness to get the message across. Could honestly listen to you for hours. I’ve realised that by doing less, I pour back into myself and therefore attract more than I ever could if I was doing more. Quality over quantity. Thank you for reminding me about the importance of gender roles because I was in my masculine energy for TOO long and I was EXHAUSTED.

@AngelaLochCross 9 месяцев назад

Keep educating, little sister. May this be the generation of women that finally get it. 🙏

@jelenak6500 Год назад

keep preaching bestie, you gotta keep reminding us

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

@astoldbynaomi Год назад

Who knew that I needed this? This was so helpful! Love it!

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽

@jibarabicha4853 Год назад

Keep dropping them gems Bestie!! Wishing you a very spoiled holiday weekend 💕

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

thank you bestie 🤎

@Victoriaward Год назад

One of the many super wise concepts in this video… pain=information Don’t resist painful emotions. Welcome then, fully feel then, be curious about them. Receive the message and it will dissipate. It’s only when we resist that it continues to be sent.

@Kareena1988 Год назад

Can you do a video on how to deal with complete loneliness? No real friends, just superficial meetings that I have to organise once in a while and no family..no one basically while roaming life?

@suchaleelim Год назад

Surround yourself with what makes you happy. I am a single mom so I hug my daughter when I’m lonely. In my free time, I practice yoga, go for massage, and meditate.

@Kareena1988 Год назад

@@suchaleelim yeah but doing things is not the same as having constant connection with someone

@healingpoisonbreak9984 Год назад

@@Kareena1988so I am gonna be very honest here.I struggled years with no real connection, and I get it, but nothing you do now, the wanting, will bring you these connections. I'm sorry bestie but this alone time is time given to you to heal and look inward and KNOW KNOW yourself, where your boundaries lay and so on. This time is inevitable but it is worth it. The real people will come to you eventually. I know it's hard, I do, I have been through it, but your people come when your on the right level with yourself. Hope this helps.❤❤

@melovetolaugh6417 Год назад

The other comment / reply is so spot on. I’m not sure how you feel about religion and faith but hear me out. When God (or the universe - whichever you want to refer it to) place you in a season of “loneliness” is actually a time in your life to be close with the universe (or God) and knowing / improving yourself. It’s the time where you will learn that the only person in this world that will always have your back is yourself. But you are just human and that’s why keeping God close to you to give you that strength and faith that you need to go through this season of your life. Its your “knowing yourself” arc. The “pray” chapter in your eat-pray-love. I also wanna know how she approach this topic. It’s painful and so many times I wanna go back to that toxic relationship, but I need to keep on believing that the right people will come on His time. While waiting, we invest in ourselves. Date ourselves and love ourselves.

@FoundSheep-AN Год назад

Do you have some family of origin still alive? If yes, try first of all to organize some meetings with your alive family members and try to see if things can be worked out.

@ThetysSlone Год назад

Hey bestie, love your videos and your consistency ❤

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

thank you bestie 🤎

@viviannguyen8932 Год назад

i literally cannot thank you enough for making these videos QUEEN

@CoCreation.with.Qualia Год назад

HOW DID YOU KNOW?! Literally perfect timing, bestie.

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

😉

@gamerbabyy Год назад

Bestie 😩😩😩 I’m going through this right now and I needed this. Thank you 💕

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

thank you bestie 😭

@Zorriel 4 месяца назад

honestly, you saying he is nonexistent, helped me get over him so much quicker. thank you

@maria_icorreia 11 месяцев назад

You should print 'Like, can you not?' on a t-shirt omg, I love your videos.

@magicmantis 8 месяцев назад

I really needed this video. Thanks bestie! This guy I only interacted with for about 2 weeks decided to date his coworker, basically using me as a placeholder. I was more mad at myself for not listening to myself and standing strong in my boundaries. Never again!

@hp2546 7 месяцев назад

You got to remind yourself that he never agreed to be your fiance so therefore, can't hold him responsible on cheating. So can't blame him for using you if he never agreed to be your fiance in the 1st place. That is why this video has a title that states how to let go of someone you never dated. That would mean if he never once dated you, he can't use you. It is not like he broke up with you. He never even started a relationship with you. Anybody who never once started a relationship with you, you cannot claim they used you. He did not plan to even give you temporary relationship or 1 night stand to begin with.

@RoxitheDolli Год назад

I love this channel. I’m so happy to see it grow so fast! Thank you for all of your hardwork and consistency! Manifesting growth for your channel :)

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

thank you for the support bestie 🫶🏽🫶🏽 love our support group

@yanayfly2862 11 месяцев назад

About draining is gold. A lot of the time I would feel that way with a man. And thought the problem was me. But I would ignore this feeling in a chase for approval

@christinelieu9633 Год назад

So glad I found you, needed this wake up call bestie talk 🙏🏻❤️

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

🙏🏽🙏🏽

@EarCandyAsmr Год назад

love you I support the growth of this channel 🥰 - I wanna add my 2 cents to this.. I was dating someone who was showing effort, he brought flowers on the first date and he showed up to my job with flowers one day with the dog we chose together at the dog shelter I volunteer at. He planned and paid for all the dates, he opened all doors, including car doors.. he communicated well- we spent my bday together and HIS bday .. this lasted about 3 months then he started acting a little cold in my opinion ; saying he was busy with work 🥲 I knew what that meant. I took it for what it was, we served eachothers purpose and it’s over now. He didn’t ghost me but the lack of effort compared to how he started out was hurtful so I decided to stop replying all together or reply less. I didn’t ask any questions or text or call him. I had a gut feeling that it was just over before anything started, I did question why when it seemed liked he liked me but the main point is he isn’t communicating anymore and that’s all that matters. He leaned back and I did too and when s woman leans back the man should lean forward. He also told me that he didn’t talk to his ex gf for 5 days (back when they were together) because he didn’t feel like talking. 🚩 I said all this to say, sometimes they do all the cute shit and make you feel like their dream girl and they are STILL not the one for you. Consistency is key. They always say you need 3-6 months to see someone’s true colors

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

🥺thank you for sharing bestie. I'm glad you recognized it's more about him than it is about you and that you didn't chase👏🏽 queen behavior

@sheaNERD Год назад

😮wow what a jerk. He was trying to love bomb you and get you to chase him and being okay with him not calling and texting for a whole week!

@suchaleelim Год назад

You may be lucky to not fall too deep into him. The love bombing stage is an early stage for an unhealthy man to treat his women. After that, it involves a lot of push and pull game. You are much stronger than me.

@tffnyc1033 11 месяцев назад

Yeah sometimes they go through the “gentleman motions” so you have to wait it out

@queenonyekwere 11 месяцев назад

@@sheaNERDthis is so true.

@iMikkeysat Год назад

omg you just fell for me from heaven, you are best therapist for me right now. Thank you so much, i was praying for someone talk to me like this

@123meenasalih Год назад

Hey girl I agree, I am trying to get over a guy who I liked since I was 14 and I’m now 23 with someone else but I realize that I’m not over him like that like I thought I was cuz I was drained. I need to set standards for myself and be sad for a week or two so I can get over him and get back to my partner cuz I’m having flashbacks right now and feeling vulnerable right now.🥺😭 plz pray for me to stop being a pickmeisha so I can stop being angry at him and move on with my life.🙏🏽

@queenonyekwere 11 месяцев назад

@@AI-ch3ifthank you for sharing Bestie

@hp2546 10 месяцев назад

You have to think what happens if you go back to Crush A right after building a romantic relationship with your current fiance. Remember you said you are with someone else. You have to set rules of no cheating on your bf. If you are with someone else, it makes you not available to date anyone. What do you think your fiance will say if you go to Crush A for a romantic relationship. You will be the one cheating on your fiance. Think about this. Why did you decide to be with someone else? Whatever the reason, you have to get into a relationship for a right reason. Don't keep viewing other side as being greener. Even if you did have a past dating that Crush A, you might be in a position to feel the temptation to cheat regardless. This tells me that you found Crush B and then that Crush B becomes your fiance but then you ended up feeling the temptation to cheat on your Crush B. Do you think your current fiance will let you have sex with more then 1 person? So you have to remind yourself that you have a boyfriend and must not think of going back to your 1st crush. Do you think you can be with your 1st crush after breaking up with your current fiance? Do you think you can get away dating your fiance and still have a romantic relationship with your 1st crush? Whoever you choose as your fiance, you commit to it. The cycle of not being able to make up your mind is what will cause you to have a hard time to set standards. Don't even think about turning your Crush A into a homewrecker. If you are not happy in your current relationship, you should of broken up with your current fiance long time ago.

@meyepremian25 29 дней назад

Don't beat yourself up. Ran into my HS sweetheart after 15 years, and I had to grieve again. Us lover girls don't ever stop loving some people, the heart simply expands to allow for more love. It's a shitty truth to life for some of us. The good news is that I did open my heart and I found a wonderful man to build my life with.

@hp2546 13 дней назад

@@meyepremian25 Is this wonderful man your high school sweetheart or it is someone else?

@eclecticd9953 Год назад

I love this advice. I also stand firm that nothing that’s gone from my life was ever meant to be there in the first place.

@saharkhalili5303 11 месяцев назад

I found your channel in my algo after a male sent me a msg on the day we were meant to catch up, saying he can't be in relationship. I took his word for it, and say his pathetic cowardice as a benevolent gesture to not further waste my time or worth.

@itspoppinky8289 Год назад

GIRL! You are literally helping me reframe my mind so much! Thank you kindly 💚💚💚

@user-yk8gl9ih2q Год назад

Hey thank you for your content! I have a video suggestion plus I'm kinda stacked... All the good-looking guys refuse to be a provider and just laugh in a face when I refuse to go on a coffee date... there are guys who want to put an effort but they are not that attractive, that is the main problem, I've been following you on tiktok and instagram for long and this is the main problem with spoiled girlie approach, it does not work on good-looking guys in my experience...

@user-yk8gl9ih2q Год назад

Thank you in advance!

@yokiponn4129 Год назад

You should look better than him or date 15 years older ❤

@user-yk8gl9ih2q Год назад

@@yokiponn4129 I don't want to date old guys

@hp2546 9 месяцев назад

@@user-yk8gl9ih2q Since the video title said How to get over someone you never dated. Then you have no choice but to let go of those people you called good looking guys. Just as old guys have to learn to get over you, you have to get over your image of good looking guys.

@user-yk8gl9ih2q 9 месяцев назад

@@hp2546i'm not settling for less sorry

@janessalopezzz Год назад

I just found your channel right now and I'm already obsessed.. thank you so much and you're absolutely beautiful

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

thank you 🥹🥹🥹

@janessalopezzz Год назад

@@therealmanifestelle You made me want to instantly change my life and I love it

@Lia01837 7 месяцев назад

im not sad about him, he just is so mysterious and he makes me so curious… he conforted me while i was crying and i thought it would end there but it didnt!

@user-bb6jx9vy4y 11 месяцев назад

For me, the parasocial boyfriend is such a well orchestrated propagandaic tool used to propetuate a capitalist society, yet it rains supreme. I should know better. "Don't go for the guy that all the gurls want, he'll get to you eventually only to use you up, thinking that his sloppy seconds are a gift." Retired Pro Athlete

@lipglosslover83 8 месяцев назад

Give this woman a podcast ! This in its entirety!

@3DegreesNorth638 5 месяцев назад

I needed this SO much!!!! Thank you for sharing this. I kind of came to the same conclusion on my own but GIRLLL did it take a while…. Thankful I came across your video to really get it in my skull how these men are.

@syrineayedi3243 Год назад

the fact that 3 days ago I decided to kill the hope that he'd ever follow me on social media so I blocked him just to stop waiting for something that's probably not gonna happen I'm done entertaining his mind games and those flirtatious looks he gives me in person because if he did like me he'd do something about it, even though my friends say that I don't give it away that I like him even when we talk with each other so he might not know that I was interested in him but idk still because if he had the courage he'd do it anyway. I'll get to see him next year in college too but I don't want to play his hot and cold games no more, any advice?

@hp2546 9 месяцев назад

Got to expect that if you go to college, you DO NOT ever count on your crush to be in a same class as you for every semester. You are not guarantee to see him next year. Part of being prepared for a next semester means you expect to see new classmates. It is not like high school. The odds of getting a same classmates are slim. You might get a same classmate once or twice but never multiple times. I mean what if he discontinued with the program? What if he found a job and have no more reason left to attend school? What if he drops a class? Remember you said you get to see him next year? That statement is also part of a reason why that habit of waiting for him still stays in your mind. Once you make it a goal to cut him out of your life, it also means you don't invest in him showing up. No matter the reason, you have to detach. Your mind needs to think like ok, he might not come. Then I continue without him. If he comes, great.

@BlackTinkerbell 3 месяца назад

Work on yourself be the best that you can be, you’ll prolly forget about him then Like is he even funny? Can he cook??

@Dusk425 Месяц назад

I was a delulu over my first crush for over 4 years. When I finally got the courage to text me, he made it really clear that he was not interested. That rejection helped me to move on from him.

@christine3314 Месяц назад

pls help a girl out because ive been liking a guy for 4 yrs too

@hp2546 13 дней назад

@@christine3314 Then this means you need to first ask him out. I mean look at what Dusk425 did. It did say she got rejected which meant Dusk425 started by asking him out. So what that means is you need to ask a guy out on a date first. If he rejects you, then you move on. Don't move on if you have not gave it a try yet. If you decided to run without giving it a try, you will be stuck asking questions on how to get over him. Don't run if the opportunity is not dead yet. Dusk425 has a better excuse to move on because she did try asking him out. Then once she receive that rejection, she moved on. You just need to follow Dusk425's example.

@river2805 10 месяцев назад

this video really really helped me. you don't even know how grateful i am for this! having affirmations & reminders online like this allows me to nourish my community & not drain them with the emotional baggage that comes along with getting over a shitty situationship. of course that's what friends are for, support, but i would rather get that bag with my besties & having this on repeat doesn't hurt a thing ✨✨🌟🌟✨✨frees up space in my brain to live my best (positive) delulu life. gracias mi amor

@afiuma 9 месяцев назад

oh god I needed it, thank you bestie....you're the best girl in the world, thank you so much....damn 2 years suffering for a guy who kept me as candy in his pocket. I learned other language for him, I basically immersed in his culture to get closer to him and he was only giving me empty promises and betraying me...hurts badly. And with time it gets easier, you know you might not forgive, but you forget it and start missing good times...especially when you're fed with breadcrumbs like a dove...I thought he loved me...but im wrong, so sad to be wrong...thank you for shaking me once again, it helps so much

@user-bv2xp7sq5j 7 месяцев назад

I've just started watching, BUT you have the prettiest eyebrows that I've ever seen 🤩

@Dw3nG6K 11 месяцев назад

The kind of pep talk we all need everyday in the morning before going out in the world and forgetting that we are the damn fucking prize and we should ACT like it in whatever setting or social situation.

@reginageorgetownuni 4 месяца назад

Thank you for this. Thank you

@cilene9812 Год назад

Bestie I agree, our energy as women is precious. We must gatekeep it haha

@neweelle 3 дня назад

It's not entirely my case as I'm looking for getting over a girl (I'm a girl too) communication with whom and whose validation I crave so much that I think about her almost all days long. She's not interested in me at all. Your words that a person who's not into you simply doesn't exist in your life, is a real and precious insight for me. Thank you for this message!

@kubrosh 11 месяцев назад

One of my exes had wasted my 2,5 years of beautiful, young, sexy, wonderful life! Yes, he seemed like he was there physically. But he was blinding my eyes through dreams and goals that he had no intention of pursuing. Stop wasting your sexy-breasts-years on horrible men, bestie!

@luca8365 Год назад

i've been crying whille listining to you nd thinking of him but you really helped me to get over i can't thatnk you enough ✨💗

@Sweetdevotion358 Год назад

😂 gosh thank you. I’m so glad I found you the other day. The bestie I need 💞

@GalaxyAngelGirl Год назад

You are the absolute bomb!!!! I'm so glad I found you. Anyone who stumbles upon this info is blessed beyond measure. Keep up the extraordinary work!!!!!

@zwayra6903 11 месяцев назад

If only I came across this video 8 months ago, it would’ve saved me a lot of tears…

@SacramentalSims 5 месяцев назад

oh this is for the situationship girlies, not us 'longing for a fictional character' girlies 😂I can't even remember the last time I was hung up on a real human male.

@naomijanelle7146 Год назад

In a short amount of minute there is more valuable information in this video than in a few whole u tube accounts togheter.

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

@avanibacardi6042 Год назад

miss girlie subscribing you rn cause WHERE HAVE U BEEN ALL MY LIFE

@trisha__________ Год назад

bestie, i could not agree more with you!!! thanks for this 😌

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

thank you bestie

@CourtneyzW0rld Год назад

Imma have to watch this like every week😅🥴😩😭😂

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

@scarlettchaperon5173 9 месяцев назад

New subscriber and listening to this a second time cause I need the information to print in PDF format in my head. Thank you bestie, it was harsh but I needed this

@thewildflower1228 Год назад

Gurrrl! Do you read my mind? I'm literally going through this right now. Thank you universe! ❤

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

🥹🥹

@yasminnazihah3598 7 месяцев назад

Ive been delulu for 3 years now DAMNNN i need to move on

@superquasigalaxygamer6297 2 месяца назад

You can do this! Try and fill your life with hobbies and people that you love, it helps a lot 🙏❤️

@yasminnazihah3598 2 месяца назад

@@superquasigalaxygamer6297 ^_^ Thanks for the encouragement. Have a nice day!

@cisforchanel Год назад

i agree w everything but the guy friends part lowkey only bc I use my guy friends for things, help, excelling my net worth, money, etc.

@tffnyc1033 11 месяцев назад

But that gets draining

@rz4317 7 месяцев назад

everytime i see his extremely handsome self i just fall in love all over again idk what to do

@rz4317 7 месяцев назад

this has been going on for about a year and a half :/

@claresutton2819 3 месяца назад

@@rz4317 You are enough and valuable, Spoilt Girly. Gather up your girlfriends and rely upon them. Those charming boys can hurt us. If he was not treating you special...he's probably into someone else. Maybe a bunch of girls. He passed a treasure, Darling. I hate that for you. His loss. xoxo Can you go out tomorrow and get your nails done, put on a pretty candle, wear some perfume to remind yourself that you are special? Look after your beautiful self. xoxo

@claresutton2819 3 месяца назад

You are a beautiful heart and mind and you only deserve love from a man. If he isn't blowing up your phone, Sweetheart, he's not interested. What an idiot he is.

@Nataliexgiselle 11 месяцев назад

The pep talk I needed today! Thanks babes!

@MyraMabry 9 месяцев назад

You give some of the best dating advice on the internet

@hp2546 3 месяца назад

The ones giving good dating advice on the internet are the ones who don't give shortcuts or quick fix ideas for dating. There are many who teaches people on youtube how to be desperate on getting dates. As for her, she gives good dating advice because her advice is never about being desperate. Knowing when to let go of someone who don't like us back is considered good dating advice.

@julesa1754 Год назад

Bestie, I just came across your chanel yesterday and this video is just what i needed❤

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

🥹🥹hope it helps bestie

@aftertonightjazz 7 месяцев назад

Damn. This is Thee Pep Talk! Going to partake in more delulu activities! Thanks babes 💅🏽

@nakiflo Год назад

Whoa! Best Advice! Hands down! Everything you shared here is so refreshing!

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

thank you bestie

@lovewitchkiss Год назад

thank you so much i always fall in love with guys that I’m not dating bc in my head i think I’m with them this rly helped

@hp2546 10 месяцев назад

Not acting upon them helps too. You can be attracted to any man you are not dating as long as you have self control and not being obssessed with them. In your head, you can have sex but in reality, it never happens. Whole point of being in love with your crush and not having any connections to hang out is admiring from afar. I fall in love with women I am not dating too however, I don't chase her. Even if I fall in love, I don't act upon them. I admire from afar. I keep 6 ft social distance even way before 2020 and I still do because I know they are not going to give me permission to touch them in a sexual way. In 2020, government forced people to keep 6 ft from people. Around crushes we cannot have, we also keep 6 ft from them. Whole point of admiring from afar is just living a fantasy after all.

@youmakemenauseous 6 месяцев назад

I genuinely feel SO MUCH BETTER after this video, thank you ❤

@AnaPerez-qe4gq 8 месяцев назад

This video came to me at the best time. Two weeks ago I met a guy and the attraction was instantaneous, it knocked me out. We talked for a while and believe me it seemed reciprocal, he talked to me when he woke up and when he went to bed. And everything increased until we had sex and the next day he showed no signs... he disappeared. The truth is that it makes no head or tail, but that's what I have to accept now. That I will never go after a man, that it will have to be the other way around

@Myatheroses 9 месяцев назад

It’s cause I had an emotionally unavailable father. So fantasy is what kept me going for a long time. But I’m glad I’ve woken up now even though it’s painful to let go of what I should have had but couldn’t have

@MrMaaf Год назад

Where were you 3 years ago! Yeeeessss so on spot! Been there, done that you are right and GIRlS, PlEASE, PlEASE LISTEN TO THIS AMAZING YOUNG WOMEN coz its all true, this is just the pattern that we can't perceive when we are infatuated with this particular persona. Blessings❤

@misshunti Год назад

this is such good advice! i needed this cause this man did me so WRONG like yuck.

@therealmanifestelle Год назад

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

@gabyszabo9615 2 месяца назад

I am an old married lady, but I am learning so much about how to guide my daughter when this season comes. "Look at things as they are: did your bank account get fatter? did you move forward in your business or career in any way shape or form? did your social status elevate? did you gain access to better aligned people places and things? did those things happen while you were in proximity to this man? No? Okay: he doesn't exist." And when I think back on my own courtship with my hubby a million years ago: YES, he was more crazy over me. Keep teaching, Elle!

@hp2546 2 месяца назад

Sounds like you did have to break up while most of us don't even have a shot at a couple's relationship. Video title here is how to get over someone you never dated. At least for you, you did date that person. You're married and you most likely have an ex you need to break up with. You basically did have to let go of someone you previously dated which means yours is about how to deal with a break up.

@gabyszabo9615 2 месяца назад

@@hp2546 I don't understand your reply. I just commended Elle on the lesson, and quoted a part of the lesson that I found particularly memorable.

@hp2546 Месяц назад

@@gabyszabo9615 If you are considered a married woman, you are technically having a romantic partner or in a relationship. Title of this video is how to get over someone you never dated. You had already dated him and ended up married to him. So in your part, getting over him would of mean going through the process of ending the marriage and getting a divorce. Your relationship had already started. If you never dated him, then that meant the relationship never started. No start, no end.

@tribalrose 8 месяцев назад

i love how real you are in this video!!!! thank you before your honesty

@cici7841 7 месяцев назад

Bestie, wake up! Best advice, thank you girl

@mani0403 11 месяцев назад

God bless you!!! Aligning powerful women to their worth!!!! I needed to hear this and process the bs I thought was okay.

@ElenaSemanova 6 месяцев назад

This feels like an intimate, heart to heart conversation with a wise older sister or a mom ❤

@kanonymously Год назад

Wow-this was excellent and extremely insightful especially when you contrast 2010’s feminism with your viewpoint on feminism. I completely agree!

@rebeccajordan4491 9 месяцев назад

She’s so fun when she’s feisty ❤️

@friendzoneddd 6 месяцев назад

but you see, even though his feelings weren't real, mine were

@pinalpatel8156 11 месяцев назад

This was amazing! Thank you bestie ❤

@Michelle-xx3ur 7 месяцев назад

Ladies please dont punish yourself, rather forgive yourself and find out why this is happening. I think its deeper than being sad over a man you dont know. I think this is a result of a need that isn't being met. This need need to be satisfied not from people but from God. He satisfies our minds. Through every situation its good to beleive in a higher power that looks after you through every situation. So that when things don't go the way you expect you can belive that something greater has everything planned out. For me thats Jesus Christ and He has turned my heart whole, and has restored my soul! Dont rely on dates to restore you but rely on the Holy Spririt to do that. If the man walks away from you bless him and move on. Remember you can not let something go without holding on to something greater. Other wise you will be left with nothing.