The first lesson I learned from extreme ownership was for my daughter. Who has a terrible time with ADHD. I realized I needed to take ownership of our diet in order to help her ADHD and eliminate the triggers she has. It was my fault we ate the way we did and it was inexcusable. This change has made amazing improvements in her school productivity and in life.
Good on you. My role as a father is to take responsibility for bringing a life into the world, and doing everything I can to prepare her for adulthood.
That’s great! You’re an amazing dad for realizing that you can help make a change in yourself to change her life for the better. I wish more parents came to the realization that you did.
As an adult with ADHD, I’ll say it is great you’re doing that to help her healthy habits. ++ You also have a unique opportunity to teach her Extreme Ownership to help her avoid some of the self-loathing and other negative life impacts that can come with ADHD. (I’m about to do that thing where I give a parent advice on the internet. Feel free to tell me to buzz off.) Lots of ADHDers grow up with people having told them that they were “making excuses” and it sends them into spirals of how to stop doing that. Jocko’s words helped get me out of that spiral. What he said was “excuses are lies”. That means if its not a lie, then its not an excuse but instead a reason and a thing to take ownership of. Example: Lets say I fail at remembering to call a friend. I say to myself “It was my ADHD” is that an excuse? I’m not lying, so no. Its true. But its *my* ADHD. I own that. What am I going to do about it? Well, I have a certain discipline around appointments: When I make one, I *Always* enter it into my calendar with a reminder. Always. If someone wants my time next week, they can wait 80 seconds for me to do that. If I notice I missed one of my disciplines, I either write it out 10 times or do 10 push ups while saying it. Not punishment, a discipline *I* built to care for *myself*. Each push-up is me taking care of myself like a gardener getting up early every morning to take care of the garden that feeds him. Is it a little weird? Hell yea. Its a little weird. But unlike many ADHDers, I don’t have a reputation for missing appointments. ADHD requires more deliberate thought and “overthinking” some life-habits in the same way that diabetes requires “overthinking” your blood sugar. Its not _actually_ overthinking if it builds the garden that is the life you want. ADHD is a little weird. Own it. Your daughter has her own life ahead of her and is lucky to have a caring father to listen to her as she learns and designs what disciplines she wants to build as she learns to take ownership of her life.
Jocko, you and echo Charles have seriously helped me out put my mentality in check. Seriously thank you guys for your honest words of wisdom on how to grow mentally as a human being
These podcasts and his book Discipline=Freedom are helping me in many ways mentally and physically. I worked out this morning for the first time in years.
Jocko, Echo, and Dr. Peterson changed and SAVED my life by helping me understand things I needed to become a better Man. Found all of them on Joe Rogan so props to Joe too!
Same here, brother. I suggest you also listen/watch SRS (Shawn Ryan Show). This guy (ex SEAL/CIA contractor) invites amazing speakers to his place and I have personally learned a great deal from this awesome man and his guests. Wish you best of luck getting after it in your life!
“When I give you the credit for success, not only do I win covertly in that you look at me and go ‘man he gave me a couple of corrections that were critical to this operation and he’s not even saying anything.’ So you have even more respect for me which means you’re going to work harder for me in the future.” -Jocko Great advice! I can’t tell you how many times I have had great input from people that are above me, that has contributed to the overall product being even better and they give me credit. It does make me want to work harder for them. When they micro manage every little moment then act as if they are better than everyone, I usually feel less motivated to go the extra mile.
I really need this advice right now. Currently dealing with someone who constantly boasts but always messes things up and then everyone else has to fix it. Makes an already high stress job more stressful.
I had a SSgt who truly wanted to help, but in doing so would take on so much that most of his work was just average and would cause him to bust suspense's from time to time. We worked on it almost daily for a few months and he eventually understood that there is a balance that needs to be met. Take on as much as you can while meting standards and being on time.
I've been this person. I was put into a leadership position at the age of 18. I was one of those "I'm the boss you do what I say" type. I was/am very good at my job. I was just a crap leader at that time. One day it all backfired and nobody would do anything for me. They just sat there and ignored me. My boss found out what was going on and came in to work. Luckily he told me that I needed to go home and one of 2 things are going to happen. I either come back the next day a changed man or I don't come back to work at all. So I went home and got drunk. Went back to work the next day and started the long process of gaining my crew's trust and respect. I eventually did and learned probably one of the most important life lessons that I could have. I have never once looked back on the experience as a negative and I am very thankful for what I learned from it.
Sounds like a movie plot or something haha. I can see tom cruise at the bar getting drunk, going through a roller coaster of emotions but then he comes back the next day and just goes after it.
Thanks for all that advice you deliver and I admire listening to you both. Maybe I can help you out with a little thing now, if you don't know yet: When you edit your clips use an Equalizer in the editing-program or even , if there, a "hum-reduction". Both can eliminate the electric interference somewhere between 50Hz to 80Hz. With an EQ you just find the right spot and turn the specific Hz down. Same is the hum reduction doing, but it is more on spot (depends on your software you use). It will push the quality in an immense way, because this humming sound distracts me from listening. The better option ist to not let it happen, that depends on the studio setup - it can be the light, a fan in the background or even an ungrounded cable. I can't tell from distance. When I listened right, the hum is away on the newer Podcasts anyway. But it could improve this precious older clips before uploading. Wish you the best!
Jocko and Echo are two humans firing on all cylinders. Role models in discipline and determination, and STILL have an open mind. smart killing machines, it’s terrifying to know people like that are out there😂
Jocko got a problem. When situations arise and I feel myself getting emotional I know I should detach and look at the situation unemotionally but for some reason I can’t detach and I Find myself getting emotional. How do I detach when I know I should but I don’t?
You’re allowed to get emotional, it’s what you do when you become emotional that’s important. We’re not robots. You can either be reactive and let the emotion control you without thinking or you can accept how you feel in the moment and stay present with it till it fades. It’ll dissipate over time if you accept it and focus on how it feels in your body. You get desensitized and over time you’ll be able to control how you want to react in situations where you actually do get emotional
Why cant America come up with someone like Jocko for president and someone like Echo to be his right hand man ? America is full of people Like Jocko and Echo and Leif , a lot of us are are because of Jocko and Echo because the lessons they learned and shared with us all. Its up to us to take those lessons and toe the line, despite the loud fakes that fill the view of the country
Man!!! It is just so REFRESHING to hear Jocko talk about ownership. I've read the book twice and not sure just now why I am discovering your channel but now I am going to go on a binge! Thank you so much for what you do!
If you're an adult and in some kind of team environment for a length of time, you've probably encountered a guy like this. As Jocko implies, you'll see how it is he got there and how he handles responsibility. If he filled a void through apple polishing and constantly kissing the ass of his boss, it won't take long to recognize this and his process for achieving team goals will be reflected in that mentality. If he has the best interests of the team in mind, but lacks some skills, he'll be open to input that furthers team success. A lot can be learned from two things. 1: How this guy came to be in a position of authority and 2: How he copes with his apparent weaknesses. Every senior enlisted type and every junior officer are subject to those two factors.
I used to take extreme ownership in the way i wouldn't allow for any help and everything was on me, good or bad... I would share the good, and eat the bad... that really wasn't good for my teams or for myself... I've learned since then, that i am accountable and take ownership, but also allow others to partake and share some of both the negative and positive outcomes and that we all grow better from that... sometimes when you are in a leadership role you can be too possessive and you feel like the only person you can rely on is youself, (if you want something done right do it yourself) but if you boost the team you can start to trust in the competent people around you and you all win in the end... great video here!!
@@Bartwon I'm big believer in the 20/60/20 rule, 20% love to put in extra effort, 60% only follow instructions, 20% aren't even doing the minimum requirement.
OMG! I did this and at first the people who had no ownership hated it. They kept saying "Why would you do extra work if they don't pay you for it?" and I was made fun of and so on but my team came to me for every question and when our boss came to the floor he had no idea what to do or how things worked and put me in charge. In about two years I got offer the actual management position over all those haters who had been there many more years than me and the whole time I had been getting max raises every year. Many people who had been there 10+ years or longer than me were just happy to have a leader instead of bickering and no accountability. Someone who they could ask questions to and if I didn't know I would find out. When the SHTF would delegate instead of everyone hemming and hawing. I actually had to give a seating arrangement one time because the side chick of the guy who was married was mad at him and I was like "You are sitting over there and you are sitting over there" and you heard everyone sigh in relief because it was like Jerry Springer up until then. "Your not getting paid for that, why would you do that?", "You don't need to learn this extra skill, no one is paying you more", "You don't need to communicate with other departments, just dump stuff on them and when it goes bad (like lawsuit bad) it's not your problem". . . . Yeah I was thinking I didn't want other departments to hate me and the company to get sued or lose a major client but silly me.
This is like an injection of pure good father energy straight to my overlooked and undeveloped child parts that somehow got left behind along the way. Thank you.
So I imagine there's two jocko fans, each thinking about extreme ownership, without knowing the other one is also trying to hold the line. One of them is the guy trying to take responsibility for stuff, and the other guy is the guy who's skeptical of the first guy. And this quest'ch, is the result.
My life keeps getting better the more i listen to you. You are a true role model, thank you. So here's what i need to do next, wake up earlier. What time do you go to bed when you wake up at 4:30am?
If the CEO isn’t taking ownership, then probably there’s an underlying organizational culture where taking ownership of a failed mission didn’t go well or did not get a supportive backing for the CEO / employee. Wouldn’t this become a deterring mindset for the next individual to step up towards ownership?
I do desire the power and I do get the job I don't want help if i dont need it. I dont want to put my hat on with my left hand if my right hand works. I dont want the promotion I want the fucking train to move fast or on time.
This style of leadership was completely absent while I was in service. I wish I hadn’t started smoking cigarettes. Blah blah blah. Boutta run twelve miles. Great book, Jocko.
When you give credit and don't take credit, you are expecting excellence as your standard. You don't need to take credit because you know how you should perform. Right?
There's another possibility as to why a person who's not as good at his/her job will try and take all the responsibility - maybe he doesn't trust his/her teammates yet.
Hello Mr. Wilink I was just thinking blue sky time or the time to think of things outside the box but that can directly affect positive change and create something new out of what is old. So what would you think about G.I. Joe the cartoon, imagine you write your thoughts and views of leadership and standards expressed through a kids show medium preparing children for the future through teaching leadership skills to the next generation and of course I see you as Duke who was the leader of the Joe's (SOF). Think about it, really sir please. It is a way to be saved in time for your perception of the responsibility of Love And Forgiveness. Thank you sir for all you have done and your service. Just a thought.
Mehhh. When you are stuck somwhere and you can't rely on everyone, can't travel cause of this COVID-19, I try to get some help to lighten some work, nothing changed. It went back in my desk. I don't want to take every responsibility because really, you can't do everything fast when everything is urgent. ahahaha 😂🤣🤣 just gonna take it slow. but the thing is, even though you can't answer the why it was left to you, you still need to move forward. and do the shit. 🤣😂😂
I used to be that person who takes extreme ownership/responsibility, if the solution, problems or plan falls into my track; to prevent people dumping half jobs, incomplete or when am doing something else being distracted with unplanned work.
I really believe in taking ownership in what you do everyday, people can really see the difference. You can honestly say if something should be different, and that its not your fault. People can tell that you really care about what you do. Then comes the different perspective which is cast onto any colleague in your team that is not showing the same amount of care.
Recently bought his book - Discipline Equals Freedom. Jocko doesn't tout/ talk about his products on his podcast alot, I noticed that early on and have had respect for that. Now I understand why - Jocko's writing is incredible and speaks for itself. Get the book, trust me on that
Had an experience like this. This particular individual loved intrigue and lying. Sometimes it's not even quest for power, or at least it doesn't look like it. It's just cowardice. This is great, except for the marketing backpedaling and forth pedaling.
Outstanding topic ....and an executive director I have utilized the same thought process and truly does work and your staff appreciates it and will work harder for you.. great job 👍🏽
Morning, big guy and big quiet guy. Sometimes I find myself feeling my team chooses to be substandard. I'm torn between team building (when regularly it's either not permanent or I find myself unable to continuously keep my own standard) and walking completely away (Where I find myself alone and unfortunately less sympathetic toward other people because failure can come instantly and from any direction. Not a good place in my character). Sucks really. But I'm gonna keep trying to better myself and inspire my people, because I care about them. It just hurts more that way when we fail.
1:07 - 1:24 I prefer not having knowledge of what I'm doing or what I'm not doing and know I should do. Instead of having lost faith in peoples heart motive and then I refrain and don't do what I know some people request of me. This is my reason of influence on decisions bcz I don't know the heart motive nor the name of the Leader request of me. And now I hear this audio and I'm wondering if my spokesperson man or woman has labeled I losing faith in peoples heart motive as if " ego ? " as if 11th grade education is high status of my identity ? other than plain and simple Christ within me that my ego is reason of the problem ? Their yakety-yake causes more people hating and against me if my spokesperson is saying ego is my problem their god know-it-all within my heart and reasons they only guess is their determination to humble me as if I'm their doormat rival arrival. Way to frequently during these 4 - 5 yrs something I say or said write or wrote someone causes distortion at times unintentionally bcz I wasn't precise and clear at times intentionally bcz I was precise and clear yet their preference is cause distortion with people like them helping their greed and love of power and ill-heart motives and purpose
Real leadership is like real good salesmanship. The best sales are when everyone gets to win. Sellers win the money in the deal and buyers win the tings they wanted for a reasonable price. Bad dealers hook the extra cash price for less valuable stuff... often for sub-quality things, by "cheaping out" which involves cutting corners. there are no shortcuts to good leadership. Both sales and leading are best as a "win-win". ;o)
Hey jocko i have been watching your podcast for a long time and I'm super interested in your Jiu-Jitsu videos but I have a question is Krav Maga just as effective in a real street fight just like jiu-jitsu because they say they teach some Jiu-Jitsu moves in Krav Maga but I was wondering how many martial arts are involved in Krav Maga alone and is it a good martial art to start off for self-defense.
I am impressed that there is the assumption people know what to do to fix the problems they took ownership of. I often know I made a mistake. realized that actually I screwd up, but don't know how to fix it properly.
I worked for an elected official for 8 years. They were the most toxic non-ownership person I had ever experienced. To me, elected official = no ownership of anything except for when things go well
180 degree flip when dealing in government departments. Example; in government the problem children are promoted, the more incompetent the more rapid the accent to the top as can be seen in everything from today’s educational system to police forces.
hey the job I did the most u couldn’t afford to do “ substandard work”. like for instance when u move a regular washer ( not the front loaders ...u use a hump strap on both but because there’s nothing to grab onto with front loaders u grab the strap of the guy on top meaning if ur coming up stairs ur pushing the weight and u need to push ..and going down ur walking backwards the bottom guy walks backwards supporting the majority of the weight) u have to have the strength to curl it up on bottom even if ur grabbing the legs. and at top u have to be able to curl the straps if ur turning a corner while the bottom guy goes low as if it’s sitting in mid air if that makes sense. same with fridges but the big double door ones u “ double strap” yeah mover terminology lol. and the reason u have to “ press “ or “ curl up” tall dressers (coffin carry long dressers) is so the guy with the strap on top can move his feet instead of being bent over banging up his shins. u gotta have it in ur blood or you’ll either break or get shown the door. jobs like that ain’t for everyone just like I don’t want to do office work. I’m to hyper .
I have a teammate that constantly overstates his ability and always finds a way to get out of the things he says he can do. Then when it’s time to perform he will often make other newer teammates do the hard work and then take credit for everything. In the corporate world it is so difficult to get rid of or fix these issues.
