How to Make Your Life More ADHD Friendly - the Issues Log! 

Question - how do you handle the log? I struggle with making this kind of log...

There is a thing I’ve been doing for years to help me with some of this, I call it “Butler Time”. Every evening I have an alarm to spend 15 minutes on Butler Time, going through my house and preparing little things I will need for the next day (laying out my workout clothes, cleaning coffee machine, laying my book by the couch for reading), like I’m the butler of my own mansion preparing things for “when the master of the house starts his morning”. Talking to myself in a posh British accent while doing it isn’t mandatory, but it makes it more fun. It really helps me making things a little more friendly for my brain. Thanks for this great video!

For ages my clothes kept ending up in piles on the floor and my room was always COVERED in laundry and then I realised that my brain was just REJECTING the laundry hamper because there was a lid it so I got rid of the lid and now my room is tidy Adhd is wild

I didn't vacuum my room because I felt that just bringing the vacuum cleaner to my room already felt like an accomplishment.

Everytime I watch one of these video's I learn a life lesson that seems stupid but honestly helps me so much, stuff like: "losing your socks is not a failure of morals"

I recently had a period where I hardly ate lunch. And I felt so bad about it because, how hard can it be? But at some point I realized that, whether I liked it or not, the process of deciding what I wanted to eat and actually preparing it was just too much at this time. So despite my shame I told my boyfriend that I thought it would help if, whenever he bought lunch to bring to work, he also got me something that I could just eat. And guess what? He didn't laugh at me, he didn't say I should just try harder, he got me the lunch and since then I've eaten lunch almost every day!

Best statement. "If you see someone struggling there's a reason why they are struggling". Really clicked with me.

Honestly I love having this page, because as an Indian girl, there is a ton of stigma and misunderstandings with mental health alone, let alone ADHD, and learning from other neurodiverse people makes me feel so validated, thank you for this page, it really impacts a lot of lives

it can be especially difficult when adhd mixes with depression, since your mind views those obstacles as ‘necessary punishments’ for yourself and stubbornly insists that making things easier would make you lazy. but making life less difficult is a necessary step in coping/recovery! thanks for another enlightening video, as always

Me: Try making a log Also me: Hyperfoucesing on making the log look good (even tho no one but me will see it)

"I am used to climbing over things" Yeah that definitely feels accurate haha

For me it’s often several reasons in line, like: I didn’t do D because C needed to be done first. I didn’t do C because B needed to be done first. I didn’t do B because I expected someone else to do it. They didn’t do B because I only told them the first half of what they needed to know. I forgot to finish A (telling them) because doing the first half of A made it feel finished somehow.

You got me on the "keep solving problems I don't even have" :)

"ADHDers live life on Hard Mode." I think I'll try remembering that. :D

It genuinely makes me happy when she says, “Hello brains” because it feels like someone understands me and I feel like I’m part of a community.

"I couldn't cook my dinner because the pot that I needed wasn't clean" - yeah, I got a bit too comfortable using Uber Eats when I was a student.

“I couldn’t cook my dinner because the pot wasn’t clean”... “I am USED to stepping on piles of laundry to get to my bed” *feels exposed* yeaaaahhh... 😳

I realized I had adhd because of this channel- after a few months of research, I saw a psychiatrist and finally got diagnosed at age 20!!! Thank you so much. changed my life

I feel like I've replaced being late with anxiety about the event for 4 or 5 hours in advance.

Me and my best friend are both ADHD and today she told me that we procrastinate because our brains perceive the action thats in front of us as painful or traumatizing so we put off doing it. it made so much sense and it was such a relief to hear that i'm not just lazy, thought I'd share it with you all. Honestly your videos are a hugh help to my dysfunctioning brain and i actually cried for 2 days when I found them because it was the first time anyone ever told me that it's ok to not do everything I need to do that day, and I started educating my family to be more ADHD friendly as well, all with your videos. (BTW, my mom, my brother and me are all ADHD so our house is usually a mess). I know it's a long comment but I really wanted you to know how much I appreciate you :)

Me : finally makes a decision to do some hard tasks after a long time My brain and ADHD : Allow us to introduce ourselves

I just have an open set of shelves for clothes, no drawers. Out of sight out of mind means I'll just wash and wear the same 2 pairs of jeans over and over back and forth until they disintegrate because I forgot the existence of the other 5 pairs I own.

Right now I'm really struggling with finding the line between under- and over-attributing my actions to ADHD. I feel that it's easy to say "oh, it's just my illness, so it's not my fault I can't do x." and "this is my personality, I'm lazy, unmotivated, etc." I find even if I identify the barriers you mentioned, I'm feeling depressed and embarrassed that I'm thrown off my such simple problems.

What about paralysis, like, “I know I need to do my homework but I really really don’t want to do it so I guess I’ll just sit here and stress about it forever”?

I think that we ADHD’ers are always convincing ourselves how our perceived failures (or our actual failures) are in fact part of some sort of “moral failure” and it is a constant battle to convince ourselves that we are valuable. We each have our contributions and we each have our strengths. I know that I struggle with that push/pull everyday! Sometimes i see the irrationality of my reasoning and other times I succumb to the “negative monster” and can’t fight my way out of the dark. Hope this helps somebody know they aren’t alone.

Me: I'm going to stream games on RU-vid today. RU-vid: oh btw, you can't see your stream chat in OBS. -- 6 HOURS LATER -- Me: So that's how Python works. Why was I learning code again?

My issues log (sporadically updated) consisted of 3 repeating issues: 1) Forgot. 2) Distracted. 3) Pain. ...and GAZILLIONS of sub-reasons, sub-sub-reasons, and sub-sub-sub-lost-my-train-of-thought issues. Having someone there to help and support you is a must. Having people depend on you, who get upset when you fail THEM, is a WHOLE other level of misery. 😔

So I started something, I bought an alexa flex with a motion sensor. I then created an alexa routine that goes off once between 6 and 9 am when it first detects movement. When this happens it kicks off my morning routine with timings, so it reminds me to do everything and announces it throughout the house in case I get distracted. I have also set routines for other parts of the day for lunch, exercise and shut downs and word activated routines based on getting home or finishing exercises.

I do these kinds of logs for me (adhd mom) and my three adhd kids, and it really makes life easier. But, yes, someone has to tell you, that its not your fault and you don't have to accept it, so, thank you

I bet the log would also be helpful for talking with therapists/coaches.

I would literally have a book by the end of this list

Me (watching this video): Nah. I don't need an issues journal Also Me watching this video: Those dishes haven't been done in days... Me: That's cuz I'm lazy. Also Me: WHAT IS YOUR ISSUE, FRIEND!? Me: 💡Hey! I should figure out why I can't seem to do my dishes every day! Also Me: 🤪Yeah! We should! 🤣Thanks, Jessica!

This is your sign to: 1) Open your Calendar or Notes app 2) Make a reminder titled: "Start an Issues Log" 3) Paste the link to this video so you won't forget what it's about or how to make this Log 4) Set the reminder for the time you wake up tomorrow or any other convint time 5) Thank me later 😉

Nowadays, the only days I break down crying at the end of the day are when I watch your videos and realize that so many people are able to learn the skills they desperately need to cope with their symptoms.

I FINALLY GOT DIAGNOSED!!!! YAYYYY!!! It really makes me feel so relieved because now it feels like there’s hope because there are a lot of things that I can do to help manage ADHD. I’ve been waiting since September to find out if I had ADHD. I’m so glad I have this channel to help me find stuff that works for me! 😊

"Because I ended up solving problems that I don't even have." Yea... I catch myself starting on that quite a lot, and stop before I really get started.

Closed Captions really help me remain focused.

I didnt know "if I'm running less than 10 minutes early I'm running late" was an ADHD defense and not just somewhere where I'd avoided ADHD 😭

Does anybody else find that they are always missing one or more ingredients to cook with? I’ve learned to be ok with googling alternatives. Yesterday I found out that white wine vinegar is a good alternative to rice vinegar. The meal was still delicious and the world didn’t explode ☺️

I, too, struggle to find socks, but my solution was to just wear sandals every day all year except when there was snow on the ground. 😂🤦🏻‍♀️

I might be too late for you to see this, but THANK YOU, JESSICA! Because you share ADHD information AND your personal experiences, I was able to get diagnosed with ADHD. And I'm going to graduate this year. I will forever be grateful for your channel and for you. You have a beautiful spirit with useful information. I'm glad I found you on the internet!

Hi Jessica! I was recently diagnosed (at age 31) with ADHD combined and I've watched dozens of your videos already, they're so relatable and helpful! Thanks for your hard work on this channel. I have teared up more than once when watching.

For organizing clothes: I remind myself that I save a LOT of time when I put them away. I’ll listen to a podcast, RU-vid video, or audiobook so I still do something I enjoy. Socks go in a box that looks like a fabric cube. I pull the tops of them down together so they don’t come apart and I don’t have to hunt for the mates.

I struggle all the time with my ADHD , I get angry and upset so easily for no reason!

Got my Neurodiversity University shirt on! I've had a lot of people ask me what Neurodiversity is. Becoming a minimalist has been great. Especially because I'm trying to downsize before moving.

Oh I love this! I have a tendency to identify the small issue that made something hard, say "I should fix that", then forget about it until the hard thing comes up again, say "I should fix that"...like, at least 20 times before actually fixing the small thing. 🤦🏻‍♀️ Maybe this will actually get me using my bujo again lol.

One of the best tips I ever got was to sleep on top of my already-made bed with a blanket. That way I only have to wash pillow cases, and occasionally the blanket, and rarely the comforter. I also implemented a bucket and hook system in my room to help prevent Laundry Chair. Command hooks on the back of doors for coats and robes (no need to open door or get hangers!) And for my clothes that aren't dirty enough to wash, I keep them in a decorative cloth hamper by the bed. I can pick through it like a vulture! :D Also no hangers! I also had sock issues, so I started tying them to the hangers holding my work clothes so I wouldn't have to spend 5 minutes looking for a matching pair. This got kind of long, but just sharing in case it could help someone else. Godspeed, fellow brains!

Second comment on this post... When I was in high school I had a poster on my wall that said: "Anyone can handle a crisis, it's the little S#!T that gets to you". Socks matter!

Well needed in my daily ADD life thank you Jessica

I literally lived for years with no door attached to my bedroom door frame (about 10 years). I had a door, but it was propped against the door frame for privacy. Last month I got a carpenter to put up a door that I bought. Sometimes I can’t believe what I put myself through! No more moving my door back and forth like a caveman 😅

thanks for making my life a little easier

Buying a closet organizer saved my life. I have a clean cubby box and a small, zippable laundry bag just for socks because I'm constantly losing them.

Sis! You have no idea how finding your channel has eased my life. Not even the techniques, but just the UNDERSTANDING! Thank you, so much, for sharing! You’re making a difference!

Sometimes this looks like having spare chargers (one for work, one for home) so I don’t constantly leave them at once place and my phone dies. My tooth brush is stuck to my mirror so I see it and I remember to brush my teeth. We also have a trash can in literally every room to prevent any trash from being left. And I’m okay with that.

On my issues log: Couldn't keep up with updating my issues log regularly... 🤔

“Many of us are very early to things because we don’t want to be late.” Uh, turns out that soft noise I would sometimes hear when going inside to work was the alarm, so I’m pretty sure I’m the reason no one’s key cards work before 6am.

I actually just made something like this two days ago. It's really helped me lower my expectations of what I need to be doing, because it's all written down and I don't have to have all the problems floating around in my head stressing me out. I also made a reverse list, with things that are not problems/that I'm happy with (Edit: similar to a gratitude journal).

Something that has stuck with me is that ADHD is like learning the same lesson, the hard way, every time.

Kindly make a video on the need for ADHD facilities in Pakistan. 30 to 40% of the total patients at psychiatrists get diagnosed with ADHD in Pakistan and it is said that around 2.49% of Pakistanis have it. Yet there's no med available here.

I am so glad that you said a lot of people with ADHD are minimalist. I’m not Minimalist, but I have Decluttered a lot of stuff. And the more I Declutter, the better and more relaxed I feel. Thanks for confirming what I was thinking

You’ve been the single biggest help to me and my adhd life. I rly appreciate everything you do and so do countless other people! Thanks :)

💜💜💜💜This channel has really helped me in my relationship. My boyfriend and I watch your videos on our lunch breaks at work and it has opened our eyes to some of our strengths and struggles with with me and my adhd. It has helped soooo much 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

This is so helpful! I’m autistic and my sister and mom have adhd. We all struggle with separate disabilities and it’s very difficult to get things done when we rely on each other like three broken wheels on a tricycle. This might help us get on task

you got me on "we play life on hard mode" I feel that

Letting myself keep some things "out/messy" or kind of not organized/not tidy/not put away helps SO MUCH. Not just with "adult" type tasks, but also making it easier for me to sit down and enjoy my hobbies. I keep the rags I use for cleaning windows, dusting, and etc. draped over the bottles themselves under the sink. I keep all the "pieces" together so I can grab and go instead of procrastinating what feels like a daunting task of many fetch quests. I keep the vacuum out against a wall in the living room, already plugged in. I keep a pair of earbuds plugged into my keyboard and the TV connected to my video game console so I can just sit down and play (apartment=using earbuds for noisy things). I don't put away all of my dishes; I use the same ones repeatedly and let them "live" in the drying rack.

For issues caused by pileups: I constantly have pile-ups of literally anything that can pile-up and once it is piled up I get overwhelmed with the amount of stuff or steps I need to take. Right now, I'm using an impulse based system to help deal with it (not ideal, but it's better than nothing). If I see 1 thing in my room that I kind of feel like fixing, I do it, right away, no thinking. Examples: putting away just underwear, folding just socks or throwing away one thing. 5-5 may be the fastest way to 0, but 5-1-1-1-1-1 will eventually give the same result. Even if a thing is added, repeatedly removing just 1 small thing will keep the sum from just growing and becoming increasingly overwhelming. Advice for getting the small tasks done: if you are like me, your brain loves the phrase "not right now". Always cut yourself off with "why not?". No instant legit reason not to? Do it right away, don't think, just do. Small tasks = no big time or energy cost = no need to contemplate whether it fits into your schedule.

This lady is absolutely adorable, I'm obsessed with this channel

I love it, I will do this! I tend to write a to-do list for Monday but I noticed it needs to be my to-do list for the whole week and that's ok... One thing that has helped me be more on top of things is every night (ok MOST nights) before bed I update a white board that is on the wall next to my calendar... I put tomorrow's date, agenda & what's for dinner. We also have a countdown to fun events at the bottom. The kids add their extra money earned in one corner too. Every Monday I sit with my kids and have a "family meeting" (I send notes to my husband when needed) ... we go over their allowance & goals, needs list (hello, who needs more socks???), and agenda.

Thank you for this video! You're making our life with ADHD easier :)

I have been watching your channel for a while now. I was diagnosed in the late 80's and they really didn't know what to do with a 30 something because it was still being treated as a "kids disease" disease being their word not mine. I've floundered most of my life as a result, both personally and professionally even though I was until recently a highly respect emergency medical technician (great in a crisis, right). Meds didn't work for me and therapists, well, no good fits. This is the long way around to say that, now I'm 67 and you have opened SO many doors for me in this channel that have made my life going forward better. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I can't tell you how many times I've almost put soap on my tooth brush instead of toothpaste because the soap bottle is much closer... and that's when I don't forget to even brush my teeth in the first place

I got my diagnosis this year.. at 33. And I've been struggling my whole life with things people just... Do. They don't even think about the things they do. Like getting towels off the floor, putting a pair of dirty socks in the laundry bin, put away the clean dishes, forgetting things. Even after my diagnosis people find it difficult to understand how hard it can be to put things back or whatever. "I forgot" or "i was distracted by something else." Nor do they understand how EXHAUSTING it is, just to get through a regular day. I've felt so alone in this my whole life. Being angry and frustrated with myself. But since finding your channel, i don't feel as alone anymore. Thank you, for sharing everything you do.

Hello Brain!!!! Nice to see a new video from you! Greetings from Germany!

I have never related to anything more than being late because of socks

this video made me feel so seen & validated & understood, like i'm not just a bad person or a failure, that i started crying sitting in my living room. trying to do laundry right now. feeling a little more hopeful. thank you so much, your work makes a difference. 💚

You're awesome! Thanks for the content you make❤️

I was just diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 30. My son and husband have ADHD as well.. Your videos have helped me so much! Thank you!

my family didn't accept my ADHD so tomorrow I will go to doctor alone remember Iam 15 and yes Iam alowed in my country wish me luck Iam super stressed do I have it or just lazy

I am one of the adhd tribes living in Japan🇯🇵 I have so many struggles in my every day life, but your you tube channel always helps me to look on the bright side of my life. And now I'm trying to change my mindset and bring the best out in me😊 Thank you so much💕

Ok.. so why can’t i just study? - my bed is adjacent to the chair where i study So change places - there’s no space in my bedroom - my house is loud - Outside its too bright for my nootebok screen Buy a new top-end notebook - done! Why can’t i study - play games on the notebook ... F

In the business world, we call this root cause corrective action. The goal is exactly what your video focuses on because people are essentially people even at work. Departments are interconnected and have mutual responsibilities so will often shift blame to prevent being punished. This causes people to not report issues they see and to focus more on cover your behind than solutions. Blaming doesn’t actually solve the problem but highlighting what can be done shifts the mind from defense to action and gets the whole team on board. It also creates transparency. The corrective actions must be actionable and quantifiable. It’s been a great tool and I think the reason why is that, as you pointed out in the previous vlog, what’s good for ADHD Brains is good for all executive function.

Well, you've kinda got me there. I just made myself some hotdogs, instead of the pasta I bought everything for yesterday, cause I haven't cleaned than one big pan.... in a week...

Oh my gosh!!!! I asked my husband just this week, "how can you stand walking over piles of crap on your side of the bed!?" He's probably USED TO IT 🤯 you are amazing for teaching me how to understand him and his ADHD. Thank you thank you so much!!!

I feel like this is somewhat similar to the Collaborative and Proactive Solutions (CPS/Plan B) model which was developed by Dr. Ross Greene. This is like Plan B'ing yourself! So cool :D

Awesome video. Loved the innovative "Butler Time Concept" comment. So two key takeaways. 1. Grease the Wheels Aka Tune your environment Make your surroundings distraction free. Or Make the priorities or productive things easier to do & Make the distractions or short term gratifications harder to do. Summary Create a disciplined environment to keep being disciplined easy. 2. Issue Log Aka Activity log or Journal Review your day at the end Or Carry a notepad with you and write down the issue simultaneously. Take out time to identify the reasons & address them. Summary Instead of just accepting that life is hard. Being accepting but taking the next step by being mindful of the issues and actually bringing positive change is one of the practical actions to take. " We can do hard things but it doesn't mean we have to them in the Hardest way possible." Which implies, Smart work over hard work.

"I throw my clothes on the floor because I don't want to open my hamper" This revelation changed the state of my room forever. Now I just leave my hamper open. I can toss my clothes in it from across my room. No more clothes on the floor!

I struggled with forgetting things when I worked in IT, and the approval process required very specific stuff. I learnt to make a generic checklist to work through that was stuck up on my wall right next to my PC, that I would put check marks on. After 30 years of working in IT and doing checklists, I don't forget tasks as long as I make a checklist first. Somedays, I make a list for the whole day, and it brings me confidence that I'm completing everything I need for the task at hand. I'm not diagnosed with ADHD, but I definitely have executive function problems.

Also constructive feedback that you can take or leave (it is your channel...;) The music usually stops at the intro or playing over images with no other sound. But for some reason you had the music playing in the "background" today. For me personally is hard to concentrate on what you saying when music is also playing especially since you don´t have captions. I prefer have caption on when possible even when its just the youtuber talking. So I can understand more and more easily. But maybe thats just my brain no really knowing how it should process sounds. I do love watching your videos (the music playing at the same time just make it harder do so).

Lol - I love this so much! I haven’t put my laundry away because my drawers aren’t organized and it’s not easy to fit clothes inside them, so now my room is filled with folded piles of laundry. Didn’t even know this was a thing but now this makes so much sense and I need to make a log now. 😅

I realized I dont really eat proper meals enough because I can never tell what leftover is what, so I thought it might be good to ask for them to be labeled with a sticky note. I asked my dad and he just said "no, too much work, figure it out yourself." -_- No wonder I prefer living on my own

I shared your channel with my psychiatrist the other day after he asked if I was currently seeing a therapist. I have been to therapy plenty, but the best advice comes from those with experience. Speaking of housekeeping and minimalism, I became very interested in feng shui, about 15 yrs ago, for those reasons and it being such a challenge with my adhd. I have since found many articles that actually recommend feng shui for us ADHDers that struggle with housekeeping

make one for men and adhd is very difficult and specially from the hispanic community is just overlooked

Fellow ADHDer here that relates to SO much of what you talk about. I think my “biggest struggle”... well, let’s be real my entire day often feels like one long struggle, but I’ve learned to laugh at a lot if it & use humor... & really a lot of symptoms ADHDers find them selves having are hysterical, I think! I’m also used to what a “normal” day in the life of living with ADHD looks like. I really wish “ they’d” change the term ADHD to something else that’s more representative of what I actually struggle with, like executive functioning disorder. I’ve finally gotten to a point where I know I’m not “dumb” or incapable! I’m am... was starting to accept & appreciate my ADHD for the unique things it gives me! Then, work, boss, boyfriend, and the same talks I’ve had my entire life start over again. I can not explain ADHD, even to myself sometimes, let alone my boss. I feel like when people hear “ADHD” they nod their head with some sense of understanding... and there seems to be no way to get them to see their perception of my life it absolutely nothing like my actual life. Sooo, back to my biggest struggle right now is - other people and the lack of trust & respect usually end up feeling. Example, I want, I need so much more responsibility to stimulate & motivate me, but if I can’t show employers the tradition way of building this trust, I don’t earn it, no matter how great I do at certain things, no matter how many conversations I have explaining, I always end up feeling under appreciated and under utilized. It feels like society in general won’t let me use what I can do well to benefit “them”, to let it work for me instead of against me. My weakness seem amplified. How do we get “them” to trust me and to believe in me? And how am I ever supposed to actually move forward or up? It’s so exhausting, it’s harder to make that extra effort to get off Amazon & get ready for work. And when I get home, I just want to crawl under my covers. I assume this is a common problem a lot of us face. Id really love any helpful thoughts, ideas, or what’s worked for you?! Thanks brains!!

just forgetting to put on deodorant was one for me so now I keep one right at the entrance to my house so if I forget I don't have to run across the house, I can just use the one next to the door.

Bro just now at 22 finding out that I have ADHD (your videos have helped so much, thank you 🖤) but I literally just broke or sobbing when you said "people with ADHD play life on hard mode" because I've felt that way my whole life but never had the words or the reason until now! Thank you so much for making these videos, I know you probably hear this every day but you really are making a difference here 🖤 keep doing what you're doing

im thinking about dropping out of highschool and persuing a more vocational form of education. Im just so bad at school in so many ways that i hate myself for it.

people with adhd play life on "hard mode".... No truer words have ever been spoken.💚🙏 Finding this community is literally as soothing as having warm honey poured over you.... or so i'd imagine

Another meme review please!

I have a diagnosis of DID and this sounds like something that could definitely help me overcome barriers related to that. Some days look like schizophrenia, some days look like autism, and some days look like ADHD. While I prefer having to deal with the ADHD days, knowing what is causing the issues is half the battle of being able to function even semi appropriately. This video gave me an idea to try using my bullet journal to help track some of these things. Thank you for the video--awesome as always!

2 views, uploaded 57 seconds ago, 1 comment 😳 i've never been that early haha