How to Stop Being a FIXER in Your Relationships

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There are many who need this message: stop trying to fix people and let go of being the fixer. It’s hindering your journey, it is not improving your relationships, it's wearing you out. Its fueling resentment, stress, weariness. And to top it off, it's actually not letting God simply do the work He needs to do. In this broadcast I want to break down the pattern of being a “fixer,” how it happens and what we can begin to do to walk in greater health.
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Disclaimer: The content published is for informational purposes. The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your mental health professional or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your condition. Never disregard professional advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read in our material.
The resources given are not designed to practice medicine or give professional medical advice, including, without limitation, medical direction concerning someone's medical and mental health. Any resources given are not to be considered complete and does not cover all issues related to mental and physical health. In addition, any information given should not replace consultation with your doctor or any other mental health providers and/or specialists.

Опубликовано:

28 сен 2024

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Комментарии : 59

@jackienotes 7 месяцев назад

It amazes me how quickly I can go from spinning to taking a deep breath and feeling like I’ve just been given a huge embrace when listening to yours and Melissa’s content. Such validation. Thankful to the Lord for his love, wisdom and grace and how he is certainly using y’all to speak to hurting areas in my heart. He cares so much it’s astoundingly beautiful.

@Nicky-Elizabeth 7 месяцев назад

🙏🏽 ❤Amen

@larissashomeinteriors8821 Месяц назад

I feel the same! Mark helps to calm and ground me

@smokingcrab2290 7 месяцев назад

So wild how you made this video today when I was literally thinking to myself about my own marriage and I thought "Does God want me to actually make an effort to fix what's going on? Or does He want me to just let it all go?".

@marktdejesus 7 месяцев назад

Pray it helps.

@andrepotts5337 7 месяцев назад

I wonder why I get stressed some days so hard and feel like I’m condemning the people around me internally and I just fight that feeling so hard and wonder why I’m exhausted and this video highlighted many aspects of that war and it was much needed thankyou brudda❤️

@margaretgrosskreuz8687 7 месяцев назад

@andre. Yes. It can be so exhausting. I think that's when I need to stop and ask myself some hard questions 🤔

@kausha7135 4 месяца назад

Realizing I do this with my mom and brother. It's a weight lifted to decide they are their own people and make their own decisions.

@natalielizabeth 7 месяцев назад

Haven't been on RU-vid in awhile, yet I suddenly landed on this video.... Alrighttt Holy Ghost, I hear you brother 🔥🗣️ Loud and clear

@natalielizabeth 7 месяцев назад

Love when the Spirit speaks, He is so kind

@MsBlacMusicButterfly 7 месяцев назад

This is spot on so me! Change is coming!

@larissashomeinteriors8821 Месяц назад

Wow the revelation you shared about the Holy Spirit's conviction of sin as a non believer to then as a reminder of righteousness to a believer just shook me!! So good!!! 👏🏻 👏🏻 🔥

@danielleo.2581 7 месяцев назад

This is absolute gold! As usual! Thank you for this huge blessing 🎉

@gunpowdertea2553 7 месяцев назад

Thanks, Pastor Mark Dejesus. I appreciate you.

@iw9338 7 месяцев назад

Yeppers on going chaosis right. The 3 above me where acting out, so mother smothered me. Recovering people pleaser/ fixer. God showed me that my helping isn't helpful 😮😅❤

@ioana25 7 месяцев назад

Thank you, Mark. This was needed. Your ministry is truly a blessing. ❤

@julienelson4874 7 месяцев назад

Excellent, excellent material! God has given you such wisdom through your own life experiences. My husband and I love your books and teachings and find them invaluable for our own healing journeys. You have been a God- send! Many blessings for you and your family and ministry! ❤👍🙏

@suej4430 2 месяца назад

So helpful! Thank you for solutions shared and your ending prayer. Amen! I receive that! God bless you!!

@pagelatham5460 7 месяцев назад

Mark, you're always a blessing.

@Sunnyanne283 7 месяцев назад

Thank you Mark! I have always been a fixer. My large number of birthdays has changed the things I can do. With age you start to get wisdom. However most of your topics have truly helped heal my heart and life. Your words strike deep and bring the recognition I need to understand how I got to this place in life. How wonderful to have found your wise words and countenance at this time of life

@Tony-Pino 7 месяцев назад

Wow this is timely

@iw9338 7 месяцев назад

Thanks Mark for this reality ✅😅

@nicoleanthony9398 7 месяцев назад

The most fire 🔥🔥🔥🔥

@ambergeorge6435 6 месяцев назад

Thank you for sharing this ❤

@annehortsana2957 7 месяцев назад

This is so precious teaching❤ Thank you Mark, My brother from another mother❤

@Bnesi97 7 месяцев назад

After a while a relationship don’t feel like a relationship anymore. It begins to feel like a teacher / student dynamic. I hate that feeling .. especially in friendships.

@gabegibby6515 7 месяцев назад

Making a withdrawl without making an investment = so good

@petek9226 7 месяцев назад

I am so sin concious that i find sin in myself especially if it is against someone, that is maintaining boundary, getting angry, or being rude.... Like overly concious to the point that i am so fearful of getting angry or saying smth wrong. Please help me

@Nightwalker25-m3u 7 месяцев назад

Oh calamity, calamity, money brings much vanity.😢

@iamchelsearanea2373 2 месяца назад

YOU’RE TRYING TO BECOME EVERYONES HOLY SPIRIT 😩😩😩😩😩

@kristianpoeten.barekristian 7 месяцев назад

This is sooo good. Btw. I have been listening to a lot of your teaching now. You are part norwegian,right?? Do you speak norwegian??

@E-SensualPsychologyFacts Месяц назад

How do you know what is yours?? Well, it is light. My burden is easy, my burden is light 😍

@natalielizabeth 7 месяцев назад

57:51 thank You Jesus

@lukastheprussian 7 месяцев назад

I often obsess over people with different beliefs than my own in important areas like religious beliefs or political topics. I feel an unbearable need to fix their wrong opinions. E.g. when I debate Muslims or atheists about God and who Jesus is. I know that being passionate about the truth might be something godly but in my case the craving for correcting others becomes torment. If I could I would jump through time to the moment when every knee bows and every mouth confesses that Jesus is LORD...

@messenger8854 7 месяцев назад

Sounds like you have a powerful evangelism gifting but like Pastor Mark says we have to be Spirit led. We can't save anyone. We share the gospel and trust God to do the rest. It has less to do with being right and more compassion for the person's blindness and what that could cost them (their soul). You may also find that God will lead you to do more prayer for the person and less "reasoning" with persons of different faiths. Well, just a thought

@natalielizabeth 3 месяца назад

1:02:42

@Nightwalker25-m3u 7 месяцев назад

❤❤❤❤

@StarAriel1 7 месяцев назад

How. Did. You. Knoooww. I needed this!

@smokingcrab2290 7 месяцев назад

Mark out there being the dude that relates to us when no one else will. That's why his content is so powerful

@lukastheprussian 7 месяцев назад

You're close to 50.000 subscribers Mark, congratulations 👏🏼🎉

@pamelavirnoche9573 7 месяцев назад

Yikes 😳 this is so true I’m used to be in both sides of this too. Driven , sense of guilt …. Many including myself can play Holy Spirit Junior.

@haloshock300 7 месяцев назад

Big relief after watching this , thanks Mark

@beeson5450 7 месяцев назад

Great stuff Mark, I am at a time when my OCD has calmed down a lot, but I am left feeling a lot of resentment towards the people closest to me. While everything you say does make sense, I find I am in the opposite camp where I find it painful to hold my boundaries and say no to anyone. The idea of correcting anyone seems like a huge step. Even when I successfully hold a boundary it usually get trampled not long after. I sometimes feel I should disappear from everyone and try again. I can now tell who I need to stay away from, problem is all my close relationships are with dysfunctional people. Any advice in this area?

@marktdejesus 7 месяцев назад

There's still aspects that can apply in this video. Check out when I talk about what compassionate grace looks like.

@Ashleyunfiltered 7 месяцев назад

You sir. Are truly a GIFT from God himself and has been the answers to the many questions I’ve had in regards to many things. I was first introduced to you by searching loving yourself the Godly way because no one if at all anyone talks about it without loving yourself being condemned. I found a video of your podcast with your wife, which lead me to your book (which I typed the same concept on audible and YOU SIR AGAIN POPPED UP) I just bought the physical copy of your book and now my HUSBAND is listening to your book on Audible. And now I’m HOOKED on your wisdom from God and how you break down the things nobody in the church seems to want to talk about and go deeper into. I recently stepped away from the church (building) and focusing on my church family in the body of Christ and I’m so glad I found you brother❤ I have so much more to add about how much your teachings have been a blessing to me but we’d be here all day so I just said what I said to say Thank you❤ Love from Toronto 🇨🇦

@lisapritchard6079 7 месяцев назад

Wow….this was an eye opener for me.i did not realize this was wrong .Thank you

@mirushekerkuti7205 7 месяцев назад

Thank you so much for explaining this is best given information God bless you

@sherriesthilaire 7 месяцев назад

Oh. My. Goodness. Ouch! THANK YOU!

@Nightwalker25-m3u 7 месяцев назад

Man, these last two years. I been finding out that i'm just needing to reparent myself in a huge way. Forgiving myself, loving myself, and really seeing myself as independent as i can be. Hopefully in this journey process i can develop good people skills so i can have a gf someday. ❤

@moniquepierce5620 7 месяцев назад

Thank you for this video! From a child to an aduilt.. my parents were the first ones who made me responsible for their emotional state, physical and mental states. Then it went into other relationships. The same as it relates to being at fault for the abuse, disrespect, drama. I am being told its on me to fix bc I am the cause. It's such a heavy burden. I am a reconciler and I want to be on good terms with all. But I am wanting to let these burdens go so I can enjoy life.

@natalielizabeth 3 месяца назад

15:24 "You cant be at peace until someone makes a better decision." Sheeesh. Too real.... but I did find some freedom months ago about that... so thank you Lord❣️

@Nightwalker25-m3u 5 месяцев назад

Thank you very much! ❤

@Bnesi97 7 месяцев назад

All I can say is WOW!! This was exactly what I’ve been experiencing and needed to hear!! Thanks Mark 🔥

@ntcc2821 4 месяца назад

Woow.....wow wow

@matthewy8768 3 месяца назад

As a Shepard over a group of young boys, around the ages of 5 to 7, how do I apply this? I often am frustrated by what comes out of me because of their actions. So how do I in love balance correction in an appropriate way for this age group? If I don't say anything they will just go wild. I think this video is wonderful as I have seen God teach this to my wife, that nagging me never works and so she just prays and let's the Lord work. But what would be appropriate for young boys that are highly energetic? Much love in the Lord.

@rockerune 7 месяцев назад

Great teaching. Boundries has helped me so much and Im still growing. Learning to let go

@margaretgrosskreuz8687 7 месяцев назад

YES. At 6:30 into this I'm going "YES!" I just have to share about God's Grace. And EVERYONE better listen 😩. And far from everyone want to hear it It saddens me, but you are right Mark ❤️

@natSH1982 7 месяцев назад

I have been avoiding watching this video for days. Finally the Spirit really impressed on me to do so. Words of wisdom I needed to hear very much. Is it ever to late to change? I know the answer is no, but am I willing?

@Nightwalker25-m3u 7 месяцев назад

Id like to meet a young Mark Dejesus that was 25. ❤