How To Unf*** Your Life | 6 Steps To Reinvent Yourself In 2024 

Right now, few minutes ago I was about to enter in an spiral of negative thoughts and emotions and feeling sorry about myself, the abilities I lack, the places I couldn’t visit this year and so on~ I was about to literally laid down and cry and this video popped up. Now I’m crying because I’m thankful to you 😭 I’ll have lunch now and workout, and continue planning for 2024 🏋🏻‍♀️ Thank you so much

36:01 D - Don't React A - Aware (Become become aware of your emotional state, the feeling) P - Pause (before you do anything else, pause and take a breath) P - Ponder (Ponder what options are available to you) E - Emotions (Choose the emotional state that works best for you that serves you in a path towards empowerment and growth) R - Respond (Decide how you want to respond)

Fun fact: 'Dapper' means 'brave' in Dutch so I raise my glass to all you dapper warriors out there!

18:21 | The 6 Steps are: (1) Decide, (2) Awareness, (3) Pause, (4) Pivot, (5) Execute, (6) Rewire. Hope it helps.

🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation: 00:00 🧐 *Embracing Change and Growth* - Exploring the reluctance to change despite dissatisfaction with one's current state. - The importance of letting go of an old identity to adopt a new, more aligned one. - Introducing the video's theme: mindset and intentionality in life. 01:21 🌍 *Perception and Emotional Influence* - The impact of emotional stateon how we perceive and interpret objective truths. - Example of interpreting a parking ticket scenario differently based on emotional state. - Emphasizing the subjective lens through which we view objective events. 03:12 🔄 *Transitioning to a Higher Self* - The importance of observing without judgment for personal growth. - How our emotional states can skew our perception and interpretation of events. - Anecdotes illustrating how a change in emotional state can alter perception. 05:05 🤔 *The Impact of Emotional State on Communication* - Discussing the influence of emotional states on how advice is received. - The difference in interpretation of the same advice based on one's emotional state. - Highlighting the role of self-esteem and confidence in perception. 07:09 🔄 *Platinum Rule over Golden Rule* - The Platinum Rule: treating people how they want to be treated. - Understanding and respecting others' preferences in communication and support. - The significance of adapting to others' needs for effective communication. 09:40 🧠 *Choosing Your Emotional Lens* - The choice between viewing the world through a negative or positive lens. - How this choice influences our interpretation of events and interactions. - The impact of gratitude and abundance mindset on personal perception. 11:54 🌱 *Practices for Positive Perspective* - Strategies for adopting a mindset of gratitude and abundance. - The importance of breaking negative thought patterns and establishing new pathways. - The role of meditation in achieving self-awareness and emotional control. 15:00 🗣️ *Nonviolent Communication and Self-Talk* - The significance of practicing nonviolent language with others and oneself. - How our internal dialogue reflects our external communication. - Understanding the origin of our critical inner voice and its impact. 18:22 🧭 *The Dapper Framework* - Introduction to the 'Dapper' acronym as a framework for emotional control and growth. - The steps of Dapper: Decide, Awareness, Pause, Pivot, Execute, Rewire. - Applying Dapper to everyday situations for better emotional management. 25:34 🤔 *Overcoming Identity Attachment* - Exploring resistance to change due to attachment to current identity. - The paradox of desiring change while clinging to familiar discomfort. - Emphasizing the need to let go of the known for growth and development. 28:07 🔄 *Embracing Personal Evolution* - The natural process of growth and letting go, illustrated through nature metaphors. - The importance of shedding old identities and beliefs to evolve. - Encouraging personal development by embracing change and new possibilities. 31:08 🎯 *Intention and Application for Change* - The critical role of setting intentions for personal growth. - The disparity between those who apply learned concepts and those who don't. - Encouraging active application of principles for transformative results. 34:08 🔄 *Refined Dapper Framework* - Refining the Dapper framework for emotional intelligence and growth. - Emphasizing the importance of non-reaction and awareness in personal development. - Encouraging practical application of the Dapper principles in daily life. Made with HARPA AI

Thank you, Chris. Let’s f*cking go 💪🏽… start acting like the person you want to be, they’re already alive in your mind. Bring them to life IRL.

I just made my son cry before I put him to bed. It was a long day of grumpy disrespect from both of us. One of those nights where I wonder if I am crazy to keep building my business as a single mom. Then I watched this again for the 3rd time. Feeling hopeful for the last hour of my night because I choose to be. The power of choice is essential in my consulting work. I just need to be reminded by internet strangers like Chris.

I think post covid, a lot of people (including me) needed to hear this. Being in a funk, listless, kind of depressed. The only person able to pull us out of this is ourselves. We can reinvent, move forward, maybe take a different path, and do it with a positive outlook. Go with grace

Yes, please a full video on Emotional detachment. Really enjoy this video.

Chris gave me goosebumps and was like talking to me by saying, "You have so much to offer the world. Get up and chase your dreams to become the best version of yourself."

Refreshing to hear when most self development talks by influencers nowadays try to instill the main character syndrome inspired by the ego. This is such a great and humble approach to do a deep dive on how we can be better for ourselves and those around us. Appreciate all you guys have done for so many years, and I'm excited to see where this pivot into new subjects leads you!

We owe you so much Chris. Open and frank is exactly what most of us need.

Honestly I was waiting for Chris reaction toward the suggestion for Dapper 😂😂😂😂😂 It's a really good hidden lesson in this video unrelated to the topic but it's important to learn about good way to give feedback without being too nice or too rude. Also loved how fast the Dapper started from the beginning of it, Very Smart move to summarize and remember everything.

New intention ➡ new beliefs ➡ new identity ➡ new actions ➡ new results ➡ new life. Repeat. I love this holistic take on personal development, and would love to see more content on emotional detachment. Happy new year to the Do Nation! 🎉

I’m so impressed and admire your wisdom and ability to articulate so well. I had a craniotomy last September so my whole last year has been humbling and my thoughts to words has been trying to say the least but just watching your ease of speech gives me hope that I can speak just as well. If I see you ever I want to hug and thank you. This is the video that gives me strength and the will to continue. Love it, keep up the amazing work.

I’m so grateful the algorithm made me found you, thank you for all the amazing content you put out

I heard recently from someone.....it's not a mistake, it's a state! You broke that down in such a relatable story that put so many elements in coherence. Brilliant. Respect. So grateful to find you. Sensei 🙏

This was a phenomenal “workshop” for me. Thank you all for you being you and doing this work. ❤

Chris, such an amazing video, you speak my language, you've distilled your experience into pure gold for others. As a compliment I've added this video in the Spirituality playlist, alongside Papaji, Sri Ramana Maharshi, John George Butler... Thank you for speaking up

Mr. Chris Do, I so appreciate your contribution to my corner of the world. I relate. Thanks!

Thank you so much. I’ve only just been introduced to you guys. You’ve just reaffirmed my next steps. Really reframed getting out of my own way!

I don't know how I am just now coming across your channel but you have a beautiful way of thinking. I've been working towards these ideals for the past ten years or so and I am excited to add you to my list of mentors. Your contributions to society are creating ripples that reach far into the universe. Thank you.

Emptying your cup, breaking your shell, shedding your skin, gotta fall in love with the process. Appreciate the way you are now and embrace your journey of growth. It’s what life is all about. Great video

I liked both DAPPERs! Thank you for this incredible episode! It made my day and set me on the positive and successful path in 2024!

I appreciate you Chris! You have a wealth of knowledge not only about design, but life. I am grateful for your willingness to share.

I've been living in scarcity mindset for so long and didn't know I had chosen to not evolve......thnx for bringing it to my awareness!!! Will work on evolving from here on out.

Wow! I love how thought-provoking it is. I not looking to necessarily make money, I’m looking to be better and feel more fulfilled. I am broke, I literally have £3 in my bank account but the biggest thing I want to do is grow as a person. Happy New Year. Thank you for sharing :)

Yes a video on emotional detachment would be great. This is a powerful lesson thank you!

Wow! Thanks for putting this in words and giving examples to make self regulation more accesible.

I love the humanity flowing through your analysis. Insightful and entertaining. That's no mean feat.

Both DAPPER meanings are on point. They’re just applicable at different stages in a “conflict”. Well done, both!

You're addressing really important fundamentals here. I, for one really needed to hear this. Especially the idea of emptying the cup to have room to fill it. Made me realise that the fear of letting go is really holding me back. Would love the follow up video.

Thank you for this video. So much value in this dialogue.

A comfort zone is like an addictive drug, change is a necessary factor for growth. This is a huge revelation for me, and I'm grateful for this video. Thank you Sir

I lost my job (well... it was forced resignation) literally the first business day of 2024. This video is is perfect timing and I feel like I've been given this opportunity to start fresh in the new year.

Emotional detachment is something that I really struggle with, during periods I have serious mood swings and brain fog, please make a video which includes this ... That will be a life saver for me .. Thank you ❤

Abundance and gratitude

I'm getting to this video late but this was perfect timing to hear. I know that these are definitely things that I struggle with. Thank you Chris for your wisdom. I'll do my best to implement these things in my daily conversation with myself (most importantly) and others. Was there a video made about how to detach emotionally?

Love your teachings , thanks The Futur team!

Thanks for taking the time, both of you, for putting out the positivity yall are pushing.

I'll be waiting for that emotional detachment video-please. I apreciate this discussion very much. Very timely for my recent state of mind in a new chapter in my life. Thank you, lots.

Holy cow! Okay one more remark - and my first over long one, regarding your personal style of dress, which was superficial and I hope you take in the spirit in which it was meant to be- comes nowhere NEAR the powerful message of your thoughts and words in this remarkable video. Chris, I just want to thank you for sharing your views and ideas on personal change and the views we tend to hold onto that inhibit us from taking the steps toward a new life. Thank you for sharing your wisdom, you’re right up there with Watts!

Absolutely would love an emotional detachment video. Love this episode.

25:38 ff The longest distance is the distance between your heart and your brain. ...you can understand things logically more...but your emotional state...gets into this scarcity mindset, this loss aversion quickly. ff explains how detachment is NOT a lack of care or compassion but taking a step back and looking at things with perspective. My take away: we can choose to be free and available for the needs of others when we remove the shackles of victimhood or negative thoughts from ourselves or "received/remembered" from others.

Chris Money, I truely appreciate how much you give

Thank you. I needed this video. In one year from today I will come back this comment and update you guys on how it's going.

Yes please! Emotional detachment video please❤

Thank you, Chris! This is a very timely post. I'm currently looking for ways on how to adjust my routine to claim 2024 as my year, and this video helps a lot! So, thank you! ❤

Yes please, do a video on emotional detachment. Can't wait to learn all about that.

That’s great and very useful. Treat people as they want to be treated. Don’t treat them as you want to be treated. Metamorphosis component of the story is just wild. Thank you, Chris.

YES PLEASE I'd love to see a video on Emotional Detachment. Much of what you touched on are things I've learned to get better at especially being intentional about what I'm going to say reactively and ask myself: "Will this get me the outcome I want?" and if not, being mature enough to rethink in order to have a higher probability of the outcome I desire. Additionally, speaking of letting go, just yesterday I literally had to let go of a toxic situation which was also something I prolonged for far too long. When I tell you the weight I feel that's already been lifted and the boost I have to really pour into myself to get my design biz of the ground in order to serve the people who need me most... gosh I feel so much relief and I should've done it sooner. Nonetheless, I'm here now and trying my best to show up. Thank you for this message Chris!

All the DAPPER"S are Great. Thank you very much. This was wonderful and right on time. ❤

Having friends that have these discussions and conversations is just golden

Yes a video on emotional detachment would be well received !

I have been watching you channel for months but this one was the one. Thank you and blessing. You are a special person in this world .

Thank you Chris for sharing. At the end of the day, this is my takeaway. The golden rule always applies and works with quality such as kindness, caring empathy. The platinum rule is great to be applied for people who are still in search of themself, in vulnerable or negative state of mind.

“To observe without evaluating…” (

From the bottom of my heart, Thank you 😊

I've got nothing to do with design but this dude called Chris has been profound in my career called life

Second dapper is my favorite ^^ The verbs instead of nouns ake it easier to remember. Thanks for the episode, guys!

I've always appreciated that statement, Observe others with no judgement. It helped me understand my judgement is for me walking so I don't step into a pot hole, it is not to judge other people. Judgement is used to keep one safe, not to put others down. I enjoyed this very much, thank you.

Legend! - Have been following for 10 years and loving the philosophical topics. Super powerful.

This episode is golden!

This is just what I needed today. I'm rewinding to catch the first DAPPER...

We don’t ever really get rid of parts, though. They always have a good purpose. They just need a better method and also whatever burdens they carry they need to be healed and let go of the lies they learned through painful experiences that make things so terrifying, so they can lighten up, and with the help of the core, find a new way of operating, eg the growth mindset that you are talking about (My perspective on parts is from IFS Internal Family Systems therapy which is all about the core and the parts, as explained by Richard Schwartz) Thank you for this video! Just found you recently and am really enjoying and appreciating what and how you share. Thank you! 🥳🙏💖

Love this Chris, very impactful and helpful, thank you

I love both DAPPERs and will start my meditation session with it. Really nice video❤

Thank you Guys so much for these wonderful videos , you have no idea how much this is helpful to me . 🙏

I love both Dappers! But this video has given me insight and gave words to what I have been trying been trying to practice in my own life and an understanding of why I am stuck. Ive held on to my own identity for so long, I am ready to adopt and become. Really working on the critical self talk of not only myself but of others.! Thank you so much!!!!

Im so happy I found your channel. Looking forward to weave in your new content as i catch up from the old ones 😊

A video on emotional detachment with some actionable steps would be great! Thank you both Chris & Mo.

Loved that you gave an example of J. Krishnamurthy, great person he was.

Thank you and your team for this and all of your videos!❤

Thank you for this video ❤

Been talking about the platinum rule for almost 30 years I learned it from a very successful entrepreneur as a teenager and I learned it so long ago and for so many people not to even be aware that it exists always boggles my mind and I like seeing this guy speak on it because from the few years I've been following him I have a feeling of respect for what he does

Yes for an emotional detachment video!!this was so insightful. Thanks Chris😊

Yes, Mo, please make a video about emotional detachment

This was flippen on and in time!!!!. Wow. I was also overthinking in this very moment and boom here I get this video.🙌🏽

This is the best video yet

Chris, the content you put out into this world is so great and helpful. Thanks a lot, please keep going as long as you can!

My own spin. 🙃 Develop a practice that leads to... Awareness (this helps to learn to respond instead of react) Practice daily (review the day to see where/when you reacted and replay how you will respond next time) Pause (when you catch yourself reacting, pause to take a breath so you can slow down to respond) Empathize (with where they are coming from, where you are coming from, and how you can...) Recognize (the common ground) Often times when people emotionally react, logic goes out the window unless you address the emotion. Sometimes it could also be a hidden emotion and not necessarily the one they show.

When I stopped at the pedestrian crossing at the rush hour, a traffic law enforcer instructed me to pull-over the car and show my driver's licence. After showing my PWD ID, driver's licence, I explained that the car in front of me got stuck when my car was already at the zebra crossing at the yellow light. With the cars at opposite direction starting to move before the lights turned red, I had to stop before they hit my car. The officer simply asked me to validate my ID address and clarified that there is no violation in running the yellow light (it's running the red that's a violation). Then he let me go and reminded me to drive carefully.

Yes i would love to hear more about emotional detachment please.

Please make more videos like this! This video was very valuable!

Thank you so much The Futur, Chris Do and Mo for publishing this video. And I'm grateful I watched it before the new year. It has slapped me in the face many times. Definitely will watch it again!

I think that this topic is great! And the industry in which we aspire is a very difficult one. And we do tend to be very critical on ourselves. I think more of this theme is important.

Lifechanging as always

This was helpful and eye-opening on many levels. First thank you for stepping out of your 'groove' and doing this atypical sharing - VERY informative and helpful. Second, yes - Chris share another 'out-of-groove' training and share knowledge, wisdom and humor on Emotional Detachment. Thank you both for blessing my day and future!

Awesome Upload as Always Chris and Team!! DAPPER!!❤ Gratefully Appreciated, ~ and I hope that you know that you have such an Amazing, Helpful , Encouraging,and Most of all,,,, inspirational Presence , Thank you so very Much!! Namasté 🙏🕊️ Andréa and Critters. ...XxX...

This was phenomenal!! Will keep this one around to rewatch as long as I'm able to, so I can take action and avoid falling into my comfortable identity. Beautiful! Thanks 🙏🏼

Yes please make an elaborate video on emotional detachment.

I really like how the other guy (sorry didn’t catch his name) summarises it. It makes it so succinct. I’m going to try dapper going forward.

Thanx biggest one from 🇲🇱

Yes I’d love to see the emotional detachment

Yes, I’d like to know about emotional detachment! Thank you!

Yes I would like to learn more about emotional detachment you guys were speaking of..

Finally someone can explain this in a nut-shell great work! Love your channel

Really valuable info. Thanks.

Thank you Chris and Mo

Please send me information on emotional detachment. Profound content. Wise and uplifting from men so young. Wonderful!