I agree. Not only long articles, long videos as well. I've watched many videos by writers that drone on and on without ever providing the meat and potatoes. Your video, sir was all meat and potatoes from first to last word. Thank you.
You've found a terrific niche, Brandon. Short, insightful, and immediately actionable. There's a role for the longer theory pieces out there, but you stuff is extremely helpful. I don't know anything about RU-vid, but if there were a way for you to catalogue or index these to be searchable by subject, that would be even more helpful.
If you click on his channel you'll see some tabs (Home, Video, Playlists, etc.) The Playlists are sorted into broad topics--maybe that helps already? It's easier to find specific topics within those at least. Other than that you can always search for terms on his channel page directly and it'll show you videos that have those in the title :)
I've never used direct thoughts in my writing. The only reason I'm doing it now is because I have a character that's sending a telepathic message. I had no idea what the correct format was for writing thoughts so I had to look it up. So thanks!
I've watched many videos by writers that drone on and on without ever providing the meat and potatoes. Your video, sir was all meat and potatoes from first to last word. Thank you.
Glad to hear it! One of my goals with the channel was to provide helpful, straight-to-the-point writing advice, so I'm glad I succeeded in that regard. Thanks for watching!
I write in first person and I use direct thoughts very often. I do not italicize them though. I do however make very conscious use of spacing and the thoughts are often used to convey an opposing message to the narration to give readers at least two different interpretations of what could be happening.
Could this also apply to a character talking to themselves? How could you make a self talkative character without it seeming cheesy, brash, inhuman or unnecessary? And would this be a good way to explain their inner thoughts in a 3rd-person type way? I genuinely love your content and your teaching style, extremely helpful
Hi Brandon, thanks for posting this informative, concise video. When writing direct thoughts in a fictional novel: do you think they should always start with a capital letter? I agree that they should be written in italics, but I'm also interested in the punctuation rules directly before the thought is written. Is it just the same conventional rules e.g. a comma, period or semicolon? Specifically, can a thought be written with no punctuation before it?
You can treat direct thoughts like regular dialogue BUT minus the quotation marks. So capitalizing the first letter would still apply. Same with punctuation.
If you haven't already done this one yet, I'd love to see an examination of how to write a character struggling to decide between something they want that is wrong and doing the right thing even though it means giving up what they want. Whenever I try it ends up sounding melodramatic. Thanks!
4:01 I love that there’s a example given but I must say repeating “why is there blood on my floor” when we’ve just established there’s blood on the floor we should be able to CUT it to “Sara entered the kitchen and found bloodstains on the floor. I must be seeing things(use a font)” Edit: let my dumb ass be a education in typing before you see the rest of the vid 😂5:13
For a Direct thought, using italics, would you treat this as dialogue and start it on a new line, or just continue as if it where just a standard sentence?
I have a few questions. If we use italics for direct thought would they not interfere with when we want to emphasise something? I have been using single quotation marks, is that alright?
In most cases, italics for emphasis is only going to be a word or phrase. Usually readers understand what you're doing with the emphasis and can distinguish it from internal dialogue (which will be entire sentences). Single quote marks for dialogue? I've seen several authors do that. Most go with the double quote marks, but single is fine
It can go either way. If you want to maintain the flow of one big paragraph, you can merge the italics into the rest of the paragraph. If you want to put the italics on a separate line for impact, clarity, or some other reason, that works too. Pay attention when you're reading some of your favorite authors, see what they do, and decide what works best for you.
Huh, I actually didn’t realize there was a segregation between direct and indirect thoughts. I thought they were a style choice, especially when writing in first person basically all the Narration is indirect thoughts
I am literally writing a short story at this moment and I was so clueless on how to show or describe what my character was thinking, really helped me out thanks for explaining it in the best way.
I feel like indirect thoughts seem intrusive. I feel like the author is breaking the 4th wall and telling us what to believe. Unfortunately, I'm not a successful writer, so I can't really say.
So is this correct in 3rd person? Direct thoughts is italics, present tense and 1st person Indirect thoughts is no italics, past tensed and 3rd person?
This would only work in books or novels though. Could you please make this video but for mainly movies or series. Like how to create a narrator or how to do voiceovers of characters and stuff........ Anyways Great Content!! 👍👍
Hi Brandon would you ever consider doing test readings for your viewers? I’m just talking about like the first two chapters of my book. I’m talking about on the the side not for videos. Your input would be fantastic to know if my writing is actually good or if I need to improve. I’m not looking for like an editor or anything just a basic is it good or not. It’s very hard to get real readers that provide valuable feedback, but you would be able to give realistic writing advice when it comes to that.
This is an interesting video on writing internal thoughts, I thought as I clicked on the RU-vid video. Then, I thought to myself, the title said "How to write Internal Dialogue", and I didn't want to be seen to be talking to myself, so I stopped watching immediately.
You should write a book. Very stereotypical you know. Save the princess from a dragon or whatever. BUT in the story you break every single writing rule. Make everything that is thinking a direct thought except instead of italics use pitch black bold and all uppercase *OH LOOK A CHAIR.*
What a fab video, succinct and informative! While I see the appeal of using italics for inner voice, I've always felt that using it restricts you from being able to add emphasis to certain non-speech words by italicising them, as then you risk the reader thinking that random words are actually thoughts.
Thanks for the kind words! And as for your italics concern, I don't think it's a problem as long as you establish early on that italics will be used to designate thoughts. Your readers should be able to tell the difference if you lead them along properly
No italics = free flow first person narration from the character's brain, plus remove filter words where possible. Makes the reader be the character and it's more engaging that way.
Hello. What about a main character that is an overthinker? I think internal dialogue can be used to do exposition. I think about explanations all the time. I think than whereas "As you and I know, Bob..." is not bealivable, explaining something to oneself, even if one already knowns it, happens all the time.
Is the following crap? The over protective daughter has just gotten home from mom's company party where her attractive mother has met a too attractive guy... "When we got home from the party, my Lil' Sis was in such a sweet and happy mood that I hated to ruin it. Besides, I was pretty sleepy myself and, if I was going to argue with her, I needed to be thinking straight. As it was, I really had no idea what to do. My usual insulting, tough-guy act had failed to scare the enemy away. It was also obvious that Sarah really liked this dufuss. I needed a plan.."
brandon please tell me what are the best scenes to use present tense point of view to make the most impact on a reader, 1. fight scene 2. love making scene 3. urguments 4, 5,...... please fill me in.
I had an idea that my character would be cursed and cant speak out loud or it causes him pain until he finds a way to fix it. That would leave me using a lot of direct thoughts talking to himself in a way. Would lots of italics be annoying or should I use tags like he thought at the end instead of italics.
First of all, that idea is awesome. Do whatever it takes to get that story written. As for your italics questions, you're probably better off limiting the amount of italics you use. Some readers get fatigued if they see too many italics. It might help to tell that story in 1st Person, but if you do tell it in 3rd, you can use the "he thought" tags.
But the indirect thought has "was" and "had" in them. I'm trying to weed some of those out, not add any in. I'd rather go with direct thought or let the subject hang.
I have I mute character in my story and when she uses sign language I italicize her dialog. Would this confuse or tire the reader since I also italicize direct thoughts
I love your concise videos! For my genre (1930s-40s based whodunnits) I think that indirect thoughts generally work best, being more in line with the style of the era, but I will remember direct internal dialogue for the climax.
With the indirect thoughts, we clearly get the narrator's POV. They seem to get information when the main character does, not omnicent at all. This works if you don't want an omniscent narrator, in my opinion.
Hi, so I'm writing a short story, and your video was very helpful, but I was wondering if I should make a new paragraph if I'm switching from indirect thoughts to direct thoughts? Thanks
Having finally decided to write my first novel, I have found Brandon's videos to be excellent. His use of examples are terrific and his enthusiasm for writing and his encouragement for all writers is most evident. Desperate in his research for tips on how to write a good story, Bob stumbled across McNulty's videos in a random web search. (The following direct thoughts should be in italics...) This stuff is gold! Now I am SURE to become a bestselling author!
What would you suggest for a story about someone who is isolated and doesn't talk much? Not quite the last man on earth, but close to it. Would you still use italics or just replace "he said" with "he thought" since he has no reason to talk most of the time.
Does he talk to himself (out loud)? That could simplify things. If not, I would try to limit the italics. You don't want your readers getting fatigued (or getting headaches) from reading so many italicized words.
With so much going to Audible or read aloud, how do we manage direct thoughts vs. dialogue? How does a listening audience know the sentence was thought/italic and not spoken/quoted?
Typically a skillful narrator will be able to alter their voice enough to clue readers in. If you want to play it safe, you can also include a dialogue tag (or in this case, a thought tag) to hammer home the idea that it's a direct thought
i was just clicking on these videos bc i was wondering HOW to write inner diolog or thoughts when its a 3rd person thing XD it seened awkward in my head but the examples looked awesome
Thanks for the vid, Brandon. I've been running through your other vids. Love the to the point style. Do you have a Patreon page? I'd love to contribute.
I like to use indirect for thought presentation usually. Inner monologue isn't as narrative at it's usually presented in literature, and I'm trying to keep that concept of accuracy... even though I also want to write something completely fantastical.
Awesome! Thank you! I would've responded sooner, but RU-vid marked your comments as spam (those bastards!). Let me know if there's ever a video topic you'd like me to cover
This is great. I have a place where I'm going to use some internal dialogue and you're pointing out the difference between direct and indirect internal dialogue will be very useful for the scene. In the late 19th century, My 18 year old main character is meeting with a 40 year old male authority figure in his office with no one else present. She offers to make tea for the both of them, as he has the means for her to do so there in his office. She serves him his tea and the two of them sit and she bluntly confronts him about his morally reprehensible behavior and indicates how she is going to see to it that he's prevented from behaving that way ever again. She takes a sip of tea as he stands, loudly verbally attacks her and pick up an item from his desk and throws it against the wall. My protagonist will then express indirect dialogue to the reader indicating she had anticipated such a reaction, and she will take another sip of tea as the heavy item slams against the wall of his office. This will be much better than her simply expressing a direct internal dialogue to the reader.
Do you mind sharing what your book is about? I’m interested I know that it’s not published yet, but I would be interested in reading it. I want to know the plot.
@AutisticBrain it's difficult to classify. It has elements of a fictional biography. I am by no means a professional so I'm not sure if my work would fit any particular category nor that I would know it did. Basically it's my protagonist versus the 19th century. I will admit this has been done before to some degree with Jane Eyre. But I'm taking it in some pretty extreme directions Gathering all sorts of 19th century inspiration from various sources and trying to fit it all-in-one work. In addition to historical occurrence and the occasional real historical figure showing up, I've included elements of Verne, the Brontë sisters, Zola, many other 19th century sources. Also I'm a recent fan of Philip K Dick, and a central element of my story is that my protagonist has questionable mental composition. And this is left purposefully vague. I'm intentionally trying to subvert Miny expectations, but trying to focus on subverting 19th century expectations. I'm building the narrative as if it were to be published in the 19th century, and would be popular at the time, and I would very likely be imprisoned for writing it. As I have stated, but wish to emphasize, I'm not a professional writer. Right now this historical fiction is a collection of scenes, characters, events, places, that fit a coherent overall narrative. At least I think it's coherent.
@@AutisticBrain Only in the 19th century would I be arrested. Lets see... Religious Criticism. Sexual Content as defined at the time (a detailed list would more than triple this post's size), homosexuality and transgender characters (19th century society barely made any distinction), prostitution, violence and crime, challenging gender roles, miscegenation, nonconformist epidermotomy, feminism ("female rights"), morbid humor, nudism, percociousness, penitential crucifixion, nude art, and birth control. And quite a few things I won't mention in a youtube post.
Your advice is unique and off-beat from the usual things floating around, while also being very relevant and useful. Gets my brain’s gears going. Thank you for sharing!
I real life, yes. In fiction, nope. Although I love when John McClane from Die Hard talks to himself. Sometimes monologues like that are well done and fit the character
Direct and indirect thoughts. Now I know terms to search for to read on the subject. My challenge is I cannot use italics. In my first-person memoirs, I struggle going to direct thoughts and back smoothly. I can't understand why sometimes it works, and other times it fails. Thanks for an informative video.
You're welcome! And with 1st-person stories, you may not have to rely on direct thoughts as much because 1st person POV is already inside the character/author's head, and therefore pretty intimate to begin with
@@WriterBrandonMcNulty Exactly right, but (there's always a but)... I write my narratives mostly from the perspective of my adolescent self, pulling back occasionally to my current perspective of a middle-aged man (think: The Wonder Years, or Stand By Me), sometimes as part of a sequel scene or necessary backstory or hell, even to impart wisdom for the good of mankind. But (told ya) I generally float between a slightly distant perspective of general past tense and a closer perspective I call 'immediate past tense,' which is using past tense language to describing events as they happen. For anything particularly profound or scintillating, I slip into [present tense -ed] for emphasis. Not only my thoughts, but briefly my actions, as separating the two by tense is more awkward than writing the scene without italics. Make sense? Now, despite having explained all that, I'll consider and perhaps heed your implied advice to stick with indirect thoughts, with accompanying past tense action. Thank you.
@@desertgecko4549 I like the term "immediate past tense"! It sounds like something we all use when showing scenes in the past (as opposed to just summarizing events). It doesn't sound like you're doing anything to extreme, just overthinking things maybe. Either way, when in doubt, try to simplify things. If you--the author--think things are too complicated, chances are the reader will too. Ultimately, it's all about finding that balance between making yourself happy and helping your readers understand what you mean to convey.
@@WriterBrandonMcNulty Thanks, Brandon. I'm working on a chapter today where I'm trying something different. I'm leading into direct thought with some indirect thought, then following it with same. As I said before, I treat direct like dialogue without quote marks, so a little buffer of indirect on both sides might work. I'll get a pseudo-cold read of it in a few days that should tell me if it works. I look forward to watching upcoming videos. BTW I corrected an embarrassing error in my previous comment where I wrote "first person" where I meant "present tense." It made no sense the way I'd written it, but you understood my intent. You must be a schoolteacher. :)
@@desertgecko4549 Haha not even close. I taught college down at FSU for a summer, but nothing beyond that. Teaching in front of a class wasn't my thing
i like to make the audience wander what the main character is thinking so when something happens they are like oh.unless it is like a reaction scene or something or if they are saying it outloud
I was wondering how to do inner dialogue/monologue in the context of film and TV. I don't know if you've seen it, but the anime Death Note, for example, is probably around 50% inner monologues going through the characters' thought processes. This is because the characters are involved in a cerebral game of cat-and-mouse, so it's crucial the audience knows what each characters' plans are to drive the tension. I'm just not sure how well something like that would translate over to a voice over and close up of the character's eyes, for instance, in live action lol. I haven't been able to find too many examples of it being done, outside of old film noir here and there. Is this something you could shed some light on, or is film a bit out of your wheelhouse? Thanks for reading in advance, if you did.
I haven't watched Death Note, but I'm about halfway through the manga. I think a good live-action example would be the TV series Dexter. We get a lot of Dexter's thoughts when he's plotting kills or trying not to get caught
That’s a great description and it’s something I needed to review too. My story is centred around the evolving mental state of my main character through high stakes situations so the use of indirect and direct thoughts feels crucial to convey their state well.
