I am a kenya man. Married to an American. Cultural difference is huge. But we have found a way to meet in the middle. But we African men have tough heads. Back home women listen to the man. Here we listen to each other. Huge adjustment
The fact lamb accepted the fact that he was proud... shows how humble you are. Some people always think they are right... they can never accept that they are wrong. Thank you for being humble seriously.
Absolutely. It is so key that not only one person takes account of every situation everytime to the point that it becomes a default way of dealing with issues.
Mehn..That "I love you" came out of nowhere. And you could hear/feel the sincerity, warmth, and depth in it. Lamb was legit in his feelings there. And I'm here for it!
I think a big part of why Ling is the way she is, probably is because of the way she was brought up. Look at the relationship of her parents and how they interact with her even as an adult. It shows why Ling is such a wonderful person. The influence she had growing up, the model her parents had been to her, the relationship between her mother and father:it all played a huge part on shaping how she is as an adult.
Ling has what is called Emotional Intelligence. When you are emotionally intelligent, you can relate with anyone because you are aware of your own emotions and how it affects others. Lamb....you are blessed to have her as a wife. Cheers to you guys
Lamb shows Maturity in expressing his weaknesses and also acknowledging Ling's ability to communicate effectively in resolving issues. Lessons learnt 👌
Growing up in an Nigeria home my parents never apologize to me so I got use to this so thank you for this. I will start my journey of including others feelings
Most Nigerian parents, especially fathers, see apology as a sign of weakness, for them, apologizing is confirming and admitting you were wrong, which is a no no for them... But you can learn for the sake of your children or anyone that looks up to you, to put aside your ego and learn be honest with yourself first when you reflect on any incident... That way you can understand and take responsibility for your part in it... Apologizing is the natural thing that comes after an honest talk with your conscience.
I love when he just stops and looks forward and says ' I just love you' you can see in that moment this man literally loves her to death... That is his queen💖 That was so sweet... You two are great!! I love you both! And you don't understand how much you are teaching and showing others what true real authentic love is!! God bless you both!
An apology without change is manipulative.... Thank you lamb for sharing the milestones and growth you have achieved proud of you guys.. Lots of love from kenya
Sometimes not to be able to apologize or apologize properly as to do with upbringing. For example when a parent and a child are arguing probably later in the argument the child was right and the parent realizes that he/she was wrong they just let it go without apologizing, so that child is not used to it from the onset for someone like that it affect it might affect that child in a relationship because the child is not used to apologizing
Being able to own up and apologize definitely has to do with how you were raised and the people you grew up with. You can easily tell Ling was raised very well by loving parents that communicate very well and they also taught her that while growing up. Lamb is really lucky to have her.
This was such great advice. As I child, I never witnessed healthy resolution of arguments/disagreements with my parents, so this is honestly eye -opening for me. Thank you!😊
You know.. growing up in an African home taught me that when someone is upset about something, give him sometime to cool off before addressing the matter if not it will lead to more disaster. So in a way, I understand why Lamb wanted to take a walk 8n the beginning. I face the same problem in my relationship, but I have learned to communicate. Thank you both for this video. It served as a good reminder
I have self-isolated myself from my family and your channel has been one of the most entertaining channel I've ever watched. It has been one of the things that kept me sane. You guys are one of the best and funniest RU-vid couples the world didn't want but needed. Kudos to you, Ling and Lamb! ❤❤❤
@Abid chy I hope you and your family will eventually be able to rectify your differences. Family is important but sometimes we do need separation if things are out of control crazy. God bless you with peace and strength.
Wow! I hope African men,and Nigerian men in particular can find this video cathartic and therapeutic ...Ling is a relentless embodiment of maturity, grace and class. For an African, , Lamb is evolving in real time....I am impressed with your understanding of the dynamics of communication in relationships.Very thought provoking video....Keep growing folks...#Respect...
I have learnt alot from this video, we Africans hardly apologize, but I have chosen to change from now own, starting with my kids.... My husband and all, at least it will help my children, and change their mindset, we should all start from some where👏🏽
It also has a lot to do with our culture and upbringings. Our African men are taught to be dominant in marriage- they are the head, are always right and must have the final say. This makes them very egoistic. Iam glad Lamb is learning to defuse that. Much Love.
I AM BLESSED, My sentiments exactly....Sometimes, tradition can be the enemy of progress....Cultural conditioning can be a major hindrance to individual growth.......We just need to adapt and grow.....Be blessed AGAIN! 😂.....
I came across your channel and I cant stop watching. I also subscribed. I'm originally from Jamaica but I grew up in Connecticut and I was married to a Nigerian man who is an Igbo. I spent a month in Nigeria back in 1983 and we have two children. Through a series of events and his business he traveled again to Nigeria in 1985 and I decided no to go at that time. We eventually divorced and married different people. He passed away in Nigeria a few years ago. We had very good communication up to that point. I'm still in communication with his Mom and Siblings in Nigeria and they have been wonderful. He was from Enugu and Lamb your way of thinking and your mannerism is very similar to his you would think you guys were related. His name was Earnest Nnaji. You and Ling make a wonderful couple and you are both breath of fresh air.
And so if man who can actually listen to a good woman. That she is to add and multiply. She is not trying to take you down. Both are good. This man deserves some bigs props for understanding. Big Props to him too.
It is good to remember that it takes two to make a marriage successful. Wives remember a peaceful environment is the goal, where there is peace for the husband there is contentment, and he wont stray. Husbands remember when you show understanding and listen to the wife she will freely cooperate and assist you. Things will flow easier in the home. Women grow up stop being petty with holding back the love and affection, and the cooking, you can be angry and still show love and respect to your husband. Men please swallow that pride and accept the fact that you all "need" some help from your wife Its okay to tell her that you need her, it is the truth! You both married each other for love and support so stop the foolishness and be happy, its fun!
It is so special to see how much he literally adores and loves her. He does not find it threatening to do things for her. When they were on vacation and he got out of bed and slept on the floor, I was so touched. It totally showed how much he is willing to please her, even to the place of his discomfort. That is a real man.! I hope the men young and older are able to learn from him. He is a wonderful example of strength in humility. He is not ashamed to show he is vulnerable to her, that is so beautiful. Keep it up ling and lamb its good to see happiness and fulfillment in a marriage.
I know exactly what it was for Lamb. Most Nigerian men are prideful and don't even know it. Its already embedded in the culture really and that's real talk!
Trust me though I don't mean to defend, but my gf is like him, while I prefer to address the matter quickly and it is really stressful, so it's not all Nigeria men
@@timdan1504 Yea I feel you. I mean I think everything is situational. It all depends on the circumstance. Definitely if its in public, wait to you get in private before addressing it.
Ling & Lamb, thank you for uploading this video. I have been watching some of your videos and i wanted to say two things: Ling How beautiful you looked, but especially to Lamb, I must give you all the credit, or put it this way: Lamb, when it comes to serious matters/topics such as this one, you appeal and touch the soul of so many people. You speak with sincerity, truth and wisdom and I am grateful to you, for your honesty and the ability you have to share your point of view on different aspects of a relationship. May God bless you and your wife cause you are dear brother a blessing to others. From Kinshasa, D.R.C/Congo
The most heartwarming part of this video was when Lamb realises how blessed he really is to have Ling and says "I love you". Yo! That was so genuine, guys. I legit watched that part over and over. ❤ #RealLove You guys are awesome, really! 👍🏽 #LingAndLamb
Best thing I like about you both is you re soo o natural. He doesn't try to sound/ act american, she doesn't try to act Nigerian. She teases his accent, but doesn't demean him in the process
Sometimes you need to CLEAR your head, regain your composure and think things through. It is not always pride that you want some time "away" from the argument/confrontation, it's just that we all are wired differently. I am glad you have figured out what works for you. Ultimately, the two minds have to meet - accept responsibility and find a way to the "soft landing"
If you "always" walk away from confrontations, as a means to clear your head; that is, arguably, you addressing the love/respect that you have for that person but not addressing the situation. And yes we are wired differently.
Marriage should help you grow into you becoming your best self. There is so much emphasis on the romance or lack of it. But it is about team work and that has to do with adjustments. It takes maturity and dedication to commit to becoming the best you so that you and your relationship will flourish. Im proud of how you handle things this is what's called being a true grown up. Grown means constantly growing for the better.
@@onyekachitemitope4689 Interestingly, I wish I'm somewhat confrontational as confronting issues- without anger- helps, rather than sidestepping them. I'm naturally conflict-averse. Truth is, both extremes are bad for relationships.
We really do gotta unlearn a lot. Being African we learn so much even by just watching our parents & relatives. The notion of not apologising, being so prideful, not taking accountability for the wrongs you contributed etc and we grow up thinking it’s okay, but hearing how y’all solve issues, I am so grateful I watched this video, learning to put it into practise!! 🙌🏽👌🏾
I just called that the real love bcoz they is understanding between the couple. Ling you are playing a big role in your marriage life and Lamb you love your wife so much which is very good and you are learning up from her and she is a best friend, and sister, and mum, and she is your wife. The unique word is understanding. God bless this beautiful family.
I was literally wondering about this a few days ago!!! I wondered how A Nigerian man reconciles with a female who isn't of even african heritage. Thanks Lamb!! Glad to see this. Didn't think I would see it so soon.
Wow Ling! I can SO relate to that concept of not liking confrontation and dealing with that uneasy atmosphere if things aren’t resolved- not a good feeling 😅
Must confess, i thought after just 2+years in marriage, you were a bit ambitious to think you both qualify to advice on such matters. But how pleasantly surprised was i? Thanks Ling and Lamb you are just really and truly beautifully blessed. I've been married 20 years and we didn't figure out ours that quickly, that easily. l love what you both put out, fun, serious and all else.
What does it take to be qualified according to your standards? And What does your statement even mean? You dont need to be married 50 years to give advice on this topic! These are values parents teach us since we Kids...Our Ego and pride wouldnt Just let us put all that in practice.
I have learnt how to apologize properly. I will put pride aside and start apologising and doing so properly. At first, I did not realise it was pride. Thanks for sharing. I strongly believe my marriage will be better because of this aspect
I love this one. That is an effort my husband and I make to tackle things head on.. no festering of bad feelings. Who is wrong acknowledges thier wrong sincerely and we move on.
I don’t think you guys understand just how wonderful you’re energy is. Watching your videos are like eating your favorite food, or sitting next to a warm fire in the winter or snuggling under a thick blanket while listening to the rain… I just love y’all! 💚
My mom is an uneducated women. Growing up my mom will apologized to us if she mistreat us badly. I grew up knowing how to apologize. All what you guys said is what a healthy relationship is all about. Kudos to you guys. We celebrated our 26th weeding anniversary in January 25th. This year.
Are we allowed to know how old you two are? You both seem so mature, mature in yourselves, your self-awareness etc I just LOVE watching you two together. How you interact with each other is teaching me so much about what it takes and how to "be" in a genuinely healthy relationship. 💕👌❤️🤔😍😍
Amazing and touching. You two will have more blessing from the universe. Thank you two to show the world what true, healthy relationship and committed marriage is. The people who are emotionally dysfunctional and toxic ( like narcissist), will do the same kind of thing to hurt you again and again, even worse, they will learn what you likes and wanted from them, what you don’t like and it will hurt you, and use those to later do exactly the opposite way to cause your emotional distress and make you losing your peace. Their sorry means sorry that you caught their wrong doing but not sorry what made you felt. And next time they will do again with a different angle, when you call them out, they will gets angry with you and telling you “ why you are yelling!” This world need more of this kind couple shows up, to have some true good influence to the humanity.
I use to tell my girl that, whenever we are having minor issues, address the situation and not the love we have for each other. She's always quick to say "am done", "I regret whatever I did with you"… very very wrong... It's nice to knw someone else shares the same ideology. That's rich...
@@godwinejiofor8064 So for how long will I continue doing that??? Mr/ Mrs Responsible. Love is not a one way street, u give and receive. I cannot have a lady threatening breakup each time we have a petty issue. I cannot.
That's the best bed for lovers, any turning around, your close to eachother even if there's arguements, you will touch each other but big beds,they can put a fence with words, don't cross the line.
I'm glad you both take the mature approach and not the stereotype that society pushes. The mindset that tells the men that the women are always right 🙄. I always say right is right and wrong is wrong no matter what. Ling has a mature response. A lot of wives out there would do things like stop cooking etc for their husband if they have a falling out. I agree with most that was said but I'm not sure about dealing with something right then and there all the time. Sometimes a person really needs to step away and calm themselves first. Discussing some things while still in that place of anger can lead to wrong and hurtful things being said. Better to discuss an issue when both are kinda calm 🤷♂️
@@freshgoalstv4999 it's for real. I did it so much It just comes automatically. " am sorry". I saves alot of heartache and solves alot of issues. Just say it even if you are right.
I LOVE YALL!!! THE LAUGHS, THE JOY, WE NEED MORE OF YALL IN THIS WORLD!!! LAMB ACCENT, LING SWEET LOVING SELF, AND ALL THE LOVE YALL SHARE!!! HIGH FIVE TO YALL
This is a classic example of the power of a woman over a man. This is the super power of an intelligent woman that can soften an otherwise tense situation and make a man do anything. Also, this is an example of how good people (especially couples) make those around them better human beings. Kudos Ling and Lamb!
I loved this. It is hard to merge to totally different cultures on a friend level, let alone a marriage level. My husband and I have been married almost 9 years and we are still learning and adjusting. It definitely makes the journey exciting and interesting.
I love everything you both said ❤ it's so accurate! Also, don't try to find something random to start an argument, don't say things out of anger to intentionally hurt the other person, and stop comparing your current spouse to your ex. Lots of love and respect for you both ♥
Dude, you bullseyed with this lady. Kudos to you limb!! No wonder there is that much laughter and joy between you two!! This need to be in print “ own up to your errors” I love it!!
Awwww....the moment lamb paused and said 'i love you' that's so cute. Ling and lamb if what we see is really what's going on between you both..... you've got a beautiful thing going on for you2. Best wishes
You are both so young with a great deal of wisdom for successful relationships. Add this, when you are evaluatinh your behavior in any disagreement, be quick to apologize. Behind every bit of anger is pain. Be truly sorry for bringing that pain to your injured partner. That's a valuable lesson I learned very late in my 77 years of life.
This was one of those "oh! I see" moments. What part did I play in us reaching the point of an argument? How to apologize is soon important. God bless you both.
Wow my husband and are the opposite of you guys. My husband wants to solve the issue immediately, but I am the one that walks away. I am getting better at with God's help and my amazing husband. Thank you for this video!
I love you guys so much.!!!! A relationship I look to have with my future wife . . Argue but squash that instant. I’ll do well to remember that when my partner comes around.. thank you guys so much for sharing your relationship it’s beautiful and inspiring!!!! Love forever!!!
“ When you sincerely apologise to your spouse about any mistake , you are almost likely not to repeat that mistake if you love him or her” Absolutely correct.
I’ve been following y’all on TikTok & recently started following you on RU-vid, I have a lot of respect for Lamb because he can admit, his wrongs & that speaks volumes for a man! Much respect my brotha
You guys are fast becoming my favorite RU-vid couple after watching this video. Your love, mutual respect for each other is genuine. When Lamb said he has learned a lot from you sincerely says much to me about your relationship. Ling is so naturally beautiful.
Hi guys my wife just showed me these and subscribe right away Am Nigerian married to a beautiful Jamaican American woman and I must say we are definitely in the Same boat you guys are talking about. As an African culturally speaking there are certain things we see as off the block that may not mean anything from your partner. As Africans we are people of culture and pride. Definitely learning from you two.
My God...the transparency is this video is so refreshing. For a relationship to be successful, both parties have to be mature and humble enough to take a second, stop pointing the finger, and take responsibility for their part in the disagreement, or at least be willing to admit that you could've responded different;y. Thank you guys for doing this. We see many public couples who either portray a perfect relationship or display a wrecked relationship. There's not enough out here about how to OVERCOME issues! Blessings to you both!
I love that this video was as much for Lamb and Ling to reflect and process as much as it was for us who benefited from their advise. You guys are the best❤
I love what you guys have. I desire to have an interracial marriage more so if we both have the same moral and religious beliefs. I pray for it every day.
All excellent points and so true. Both of you are mature and willing to develop in your relationship and have learned to put your unity first and not self first all the time. I have to commend you guys. What you have learned in this short time takes people many many many years to learn! It takes two strong people who are willing to listen and compromise and grow to come to the conclusion that you have listed
I genuinely love this couple. They are showing everyone what a great relationship is. Flaws and all. The fact that they have a great foundation for friendship that turned into a loving relationship is amazing. This is great for my growth in the new year. Thank you so much. I want my relationship to grow into what you both have.
I so so so appreciate this segment. The advice is gold right now. I learning so much from this segment. Wow continue to do your thing. Trust me this is helping plenty people mature relationally. Love you both for being so open and sharing your space with us. 🥰🥰🥰🥰
Watching at 2am from Dubai....Love you Ling and Lamb❤️❤️❤️❤️Am an Indian and I love wen you said..."Sitting Indian Style" that is how I sit everywhere 😉🤗
Sometimes it's not pride, it's just you trying to cool off and then we talk about things because I may be too hurt to talk or say somethings not meant to be said. I always want the air to be calm first
Every time I come across your videos, I always see a reflection of my best friend in limb😍 and it’s so beautiful to watch all the time. Being a product of a proper loving home is one thing that can’t be hidden and I always see that in limb🥰
To get to self reflection emotional maturity is needed, this is why, mostly, this is not practiced enough, and we look outwards for answers, when the answers are within