I Do...Think About Divorcing You FT Bart and Geo Kwan 

The reason America has one of the highest divorce rates in the world is because we are way to individualistic as a society we are way to career self oriented. We don't teach people how to have collective communication within a relationship or even in the wider society or even collective goals not just personal goals.

"Is the best version of me possible in this configuration?" I find that to be the best question to ask oneself in any situation be it marriage, work, etc. And I also resonate with Geo losing her sense of self trying to build Bart's dreams with him. There's such a fine line. And I had to come to terms with stepping back and letting my husband find his his way and build his dreams while I encourage him along the way and cultivate a safe space for him to come home to. It's my biggest fear losing my sense of self and sacrificing my own desired milestones by building someone else. Resentment is real and it can hit hard.

Been an OG fan of these two since the beginning of 2007. Basically grew up watching these two, and glad to see them still going strong for the better part of 15 years. If they ever split up, it will destroy my hope of real love.

I cannot tell you how invaluable this kind of discourse is, especially for a single girl. I'm constantly questioning and challenging my ideas and ideals on marriage and everything that comes with it, so these conversations help me navigate those thoughts a lot easier.

I’m 25 and my parents just got into a divorce. It was hard seeing them not be together anymore but I feel like they both look a lot more happier.

I used to follow this couple (Bart & Geo) since I was a teenager watching jk films. So cool to see their evolution on RU-vid. A lot of their relationship ideals make sense to me about staying together. Love it!

Chris’s point about not knowing what your show stoppers are until that chord gets struck is such a great point. I guess depending on how the couple decides to resolve the issue with the chord being struck depends on whether they’ll actually move forward with divorce or try to salvage the relationship.

I agree with everything Bart & Geo says and I don't agree with anything Shan says. If we followed the philosophy of Shan which is more selfish and So filled with intellectual justifications for escapism this world would not be better but this world would be better with Bart and Geos Values and convictions and beliefs

The flight attendant metaphor was thought provoking. I think that’s a good thing to ask yourself “am I quitting because I always quit when things get hard?” Or can I say “I’m the type of person who doesn’t give up easily and the fact that I am always struggling in this area is perhaps an indication that things should be re-evaluated/ended” 🤔 you can also be resilient in one area like when it comes to your career and have a habit of quitting when things get hard in relationships. You could consider past romantic relationships, friendships and family relationships to help you determine if perhaps you give up on people too easily

Fuckin Bart…I love him so much. Metaphor king!!!😂

"Is the best version of me possible in this configuration?" BRILLIANT QUESTION!!! Even for premarital couples!!! Shit, for all relationships

Decrease in divorce can also correlate in decrease in marriages. Careful with these stats.

I think what Bart and geo meant about being a cardboard box couple is something I see a lot of couples say when they have once been broke and low and then no longer are. Like my man and I met when we were 18. We were young, lived at his sisters house and shared a twin mattress.. 12 years later we have a fucking beautiful life. So since I’ve essentially lived with nothing- by my partners side.. I know that we did greet when we had nothing and we can obviously do great when we have what all we have now. So I don’t think they mean point blank we will laugh, giggle and STAY CONTENT in a cardboard box they just mean their love is strong and if they end up in a cardboard box their is nothing that can be taken from them that they don’t feel like can start over and not somehow end up on top again and again eventually. Some couples meet when they are already stable and haven’t had to “come up” together so that can be a scary thought - but for the ones who began with nothing together.. it’s not that scary of an idea cuz they lived it and they smiled thru the times they could only afford top ramen and only could dream of success and they can smile with a big bank account vacationing on a yacht.. money won’t make or break their bond and connection to one another.

It's easy to run from what makes us uncomfortable...

I think with Bart and Geo, they were friends first for years, saw each others flaws and then realized they were soulmates. Always been a fan of these two and their affiliations. Bart always logical. Once a marine always a marine.

BART AND GEO???? OMGOMGOMG

I desperately love this show. I have watched your career and content for years and it has truly helped me so many times to gain perspective and understand some of my own experiences. What I really want from this show although you have touched on queer relationships, for there to be a discussion about asexuality in relation to polyamory. Because I have commented before wishing that the ways in which polyamorous or even open relationships can function it is rarely addressed that there could be an asexual and allosexual partner with an open relationship simply because it works for them. Not because of any malintent or manipulation. And your show has been so pivotal in explaining to me, as well as Im sure others, how sexuality is experienced and interpretted by the rest of the world in a thoughtful manner. Because it's such an underlying, duh everyone understands, concept in broader society and culture how sexual attraction and interactions work. But in many ways it's very hard to navigate because of that. Love the show and your other channels!

Marriage would be a beautiful thing if it weren't so brainwashed by society in the sense that you're supposed to propose with a 10k diamond ring, 10k wedding dress, car, house etc. and just these materialistic bs from marketing. To me, I'll know I have found the one if she doesn't give a crap about any of that, because it's a waste of time and money. Marriage at the end of the day comes down to the small things such as taking out the trash, making dinner for your partner because you know she had a terrible day at work, listening to your partner's rant about her terrible day even though you had an amazing day, etc. Loving someone in an actual marriage in reality is basically putting her happiness before yours a lot of time. Sometime it may sucks because your side of need is not being met, but that's why you and your partner need to figure out a way that works for both of you. The key point is to never give up in the end and still doing your best to move forward and grow as a team instead of one person, because marriage is a team effort and not an individual effort. And a success to a marriage is asking yourself whether you want to be right or do you want to be happy? Sometime arguing over that conversation and proving your partner you're right can be very detrimental to the relationship itself over time. What do you gain out of proving your partner that you're right? Essentially nothing aside from damaging your relationship. Knowing when to let go of certain thing is also a maturity. There's a scenario where the wife keeps asking her husband to wash his cup after he uses it and put it in the dish washer for drying. From the husband's point of view, he doesn't see the point in washing that cup if he's going to use it again an hour later. But to the wife, it's not about conveniences because when her husband keep refusing to wash his cup and leaving it everywhere in the house is a sign that he doesn't listen to her and doesn't take her feelings into consideration. Even something small as just not washing the cup from both people can be two completely perspective. Over the years of this constant argument over not washing a cup can be very detrimental to their relationship. The husband wonder why his wife wants a divorce. If people don't take the time to communicate and put themselves in the other person's shoes, divorce is right at the end of the corner. Getting married is easy because you just sign some papers and you're good to go, but staying married is the hard part.

‘I want to like myself in this relationship’ was something that I related to but I don’t agree with. Reason being is that our own value should not be anyone’s responsibility but your own, never found in someone else. Our connections should be based on your self development similarities aligning together. That’s why they call it a match

Oh no please don't refer to Will and Jada as a model of relationships. I feel like Will was very out of touch with his real feelings and put the relationship above his own happiness because he didn't want another divorce. And Jada only cares about herself so they are way out of balance. i think all his life long rage came out that night he slapped Chris Rock. Someone who stuffs their feelings and suppresses their needs all their life are going to explode one day. And that could make for a very dangerous person. I don't think so in Will's case cause he mostly seems like a non-violent person but look what can happen. just imagine if it's a generally violent person. They could just haul off and kill someone. Anyway, i hope Will is getting some real help with being honest with himself. Also most people who opened up their relationships end up regretting it. who doesn't know this? that's crazy to me. Oh no, i don't think this episode aged well at all. I can't listen to Will Smith talk about relationships and self-reflection with such deluded authority sounding like he has it all figured out.

Bart and Gio are beautiful. Favorite couple other than Mckenzie and Spencer of Life Uncontained.

My mom got divorced when I was nine and it was the best decision for her and me. I feel like life is too short to be miserable and (to use Bart's car analogy) to fix on a car when maybe y'all aren't idiots the car is just beyond repair.

14:36 Bart is so Bart 😂😂

I'm excited the podcasts are on RU-vid but the only thing I dislike is the flashing lovers and friends photo. I hope they change that soon! Since the watermark is already on the screen 😳

Bart with the metaphors 😂😂😂

I have a friend that's older than me she's 50, she and her husband got married at 18 (she was not pregnant) and they always say they are still in love with each other as tho they just met. No affairs, no breaks. When you see them the way they look at each other it's pure love. They went through tough times financially and that made their bond stronger. I wish that for myself lol, however, I am married and think of divorce lol

The cardboard box comment rubs me the wrong way from y’all (not referring to Bart and Geo). It’s not about living in a cardboard box and how y’all got there, it’s about how much they loved each other regardless of any circumstances.

@Shan , if you can get Jidenna on this podcast, I think it'd be such a great episode!

I'm dying at the flight attendant omg I loves this episode so much 🤣

Shan never wears shoes.. lol.

I'm glad Lauren addressed the cardboard box comment...thought I was just being poor and sensitive 😅 - yes Jared, CAAAAAAAP

the Manosphere don't got shit on this detailed video W/ added EXPERIENCE

My parents divorced when I was 22 and I’m 25 now. One of the hardest parts for me is having to see them separately… birthdays, holidays, celebrations for achievements, etc. it can b very tiring and I just wish to spend the moment together.

I've randomly stumbled onto your channel and I'm glad I did, because I can relate so much to this topic. It's really bitter sweet how normalized getting divorced is nowadays, and it makes me question "why even bother making vows and the whole I DO" when in reality it's only until I want to. Marriage in today's society really doesn't holds it values as it use to anymore. My wife and I just had this talk the other day, and it still shock me how okay she was "if we went our separate way" because that's how reality was, maybe I'm just old fashion and I hold marriage to a higher standard but I wont lie, it really did make me a little sad and it makes me question my life choice with this person.

Some ppl cannot afford to divorce. My cousin & his wife have been apart for ten years have both moved on with other ppl but are still married. They have too much joint debt to get divorced.

That felt like a privileged perspective on money... I definitely hope to get to a place financially where I don't have to work to survive. I think It was the cardboard box comment that kinda stung...I would never be ok with being homeless. Idk... triggered?

These two were couple goals until the day I witness a nasty argument between them, the way he yelled and talked to her in public was horrible.

Aww at 29:40 geo looking so happy sad 🥰

excited to listen 🤍

Love them

Where do people find people like this 😢😢😢😢

The cuts during the talking is a NO for me. Also, what happened with the last 1/3 section of the cast? Did Bart and Geo have something better to do?

Humbly appreciate your kind gesture Dr Ehire on RU-vid , you have always able to help with any health issues , the herpes virus was something the world thought has no cure but I'm happy to say today that I've been cured and I'm glad to have you as my doctor ...

I need the full version of this theme song!

Loved them on Just the Feels. This was a great interview

A real marriage has no outs, if you leave a backdoor option you will take it in difficult times. People will never do very difficult things unless they have to. Don't agree Shannon.

"Our sex drive is dropping". That is the blind spot that many people could not see before marriage. Because sex never last. Only personality last.

Its interesting that this Mans views on whats not worth working out is Physical abuse..bcuz the bruises go away its the mental abuse tht lingers and causes the most damage.

Does anyone know the name of the song? I really love it and I want to listen to it fully. Thankies

Is there a patreon or something to watch the video of the full episode?

Thank you (: those last conclusions about fear in love are everything.

This feels like I'm watching Mike Tyson & Robin Givens Oprah interview

Incredibly silly for the host and second guests to interperet the cardboard box analogy litterly. Clearly they were just saying that financial hardship wouldn't break their relationship.

Omg I remember his two from yt videos when I was in middle school

thank you for this pod

How old is this recording?

Am I high or is this an old ep

❤❣️

Shan!!!! I think so much like you!!! I don't wanna look like booboo the fool!!! Teach me how to let go of that!!

Marriage was supposed to be expensive to leave but in America, because woman movement it’s only expensive for men. Women get to leave and rip apart a guy at the same time and men don’t leave.

So much BS

few week ago I felt some pains and I went to the hospital my doc told me I had Herpes about 1 yr and I need to start the treatment early from #droigiangbe 💯

besides the point but they look so good in this podcast