I have cognitive dysfunction (Brain Fog) [CC] 

The thing that happens to me the most when I'm having the hardest time with brain fog is saying the wrong word. It's like a crappy game of word association. The word that comes out will usually be somehow vaguely related to what I'm trying to say - maybe it will sound similar, start with the same letter, have a similar rhythm, have a similar use, or sometimes the relationship will not make sense to anyone but me. I often say "recycle" when I mean "laundry". I end up having to gesture or point or keep explaining until the person understands what I really mean. 80% of the time I'm aware that it's the wrong word - I just can't remember the right one. My speech also gets much slower when I'm at my worst.

I hate how brain fog makes you feel. I feel lost. It's scary. It's like I've woken up from sleeping for years and don't have a clue what has happened. I forget the most basic things. Thank you for sharing your experience with brain fog. It's nice to know other people in a similar situation.

Honestly I'm so grateful you and Jessica are talking about this because I've been struggling with the exact same thing. It used to be manageable but it's been getting worse and worse. As someone who loves reading but can't read anything longer than a paragraph, and someone who loves podcasts but can't follow them for longer than ten minutes, and someone who is intensely creative but can't create, and someone who can't verbally advocate for themself in order to accurately communicate what I'm struggling with, it's put me in a scary and frustrating situation.

Woooow I took a test that said I have cognitive issues. And I explain it as brain fog. This is crazy because i was told I had a learning disabilities/ADD. Now it came out it’s just cognitive issues. It sucks because i want to learn a second language but it’s been very difficult to the point I want to cry. I also have a problem with eye contact and think people think I’m slow sometimes. Even when I speak I forgot words and stumble. Anyway, as I’ve gotten older it’s gotten worse. My husband makes fun of me for it. Was telling him about a tutor I had and realized I was dog brained 90% of the time I was their. He was getting mad because i was reading but wasn’t comprehending they weren’t registering. I want to cry because everything you’re explaining is me I thought I was the only one with these issues. Wow my husband always says I say think but I don’t remember. Woooooow this is wild I can’t believe I’m not alone. I thought I was crazy my mom would call me slow and many other names I’m not going to say (she was mean nasty and narcissistic) Also my cognitive problems gives me social anxiety. I remember being 14 taking a nap and waking up and not remembering anything my name my family’s name friends,school,teachers, phone numbers

i relate so hard, especially to the problems with names and people thinking i'm lying. people (especially my parents) keep telling me that im lying/dont care and im not really forgetting, but i know i am and it so frustrating.

I always knew i had brain fog with my fibromyalgia diagnosis but never before did i realize just how many things in my life could be examples of these episodes. Reading without registering, memory loss, loss of words as I speak, forgetting people and places and things, struggling to focus on people (or shows or anything that involves my attention without distraction or lapse of my mind) and losing things i had in my hands literally five seconds before etc God damn, i used to be so sharp mentally - i thrived in school. It's all ground down to nothing. Thank you for putting yourself out on the internet with your videos Annie - when medical professionals fail, information and sharing of experiences is so freaking vital to this community. edit: also apparently writing a succinct comment now takes me a half hour and three drafts - excuse the inevitable mistakes lol

With a combo of severe social anxiety, cognitive impairment and chronic pain, I can totally understand where you're coming from. I also have a lot of anxiety around communicating 'effectively'.

I love your videos! Thank you for making your captioning so awesome!!! You include everything, even the ums and I love it 💘💘💘

Many of these hit close to home. Thank you for speaking about this. Hearing your experience puts a lot of things into context...

Thank you for sharing this, including the part about the internalized ableism around it all. Relating really hard to most of this and sending loads of love and gratitude.

I can relate to so many of these things and share so many of the same anxieties (especially others perceptions of me and the ableism both internal and external that comes with it). You definitely aren't alone in feeling this way. 💜 Thank you so much for sharing!!

I'm only halfway in but thank you SO MUCH for not cutting out much from this. It really helps to see this from the outside and feels so deeply familiar because I'm constantly living it. This is extremely helpful for me. Thank you.

Watching this video gave me so so much comfort. I forget important things, conversations from a short time away, relatives names. And with my faceblindness that makes my life messy. I have so much anxiety when forgetting things due to trauma and yet

I know how hard this is to go through every day but I'm proud of you for being open about it. It will definitely help me explain to people what I'm going through, tahnk you for that

Thank you so much for posting this! I always thought that I was lazy, or stupid, when I thought I couldn't retain information. I forget how old I am! Thank you for letting me know I'm not alone!

Thank you! This video helped me a lot. I have POTS/dysautonomia and my brain fog has recently gotten a lot worse. Not a lot of people talk about it so I just felt guilty and didn't know what to tell people. I tried to force myself to focus harder but I couldn't and it was so upsetting. Finding your channel has really helped me start to accept where I am at. I'm chronically ill and disabled and that's okay. It is just a part of who I am. I started showing my mom your videos and she says that seeing your videos helps her understand better what I'm going through. Sorry this is so long, I just really want to thank you for all these amazing videos.

I'll definitely have this in my mind when I'm meeting new people, you never know what the person is going through. Thank you for sharing, you're awesome 💙🐦

“maybe it’s not about you” is generally good advice when dealing with people. this was really interesting! thanks for sharing. 💙

Thank you so much for posting this ❤ I have had cognitive problems my whole life and they have only gotten worse with age. Now i have fibromyalgia and my brain fog is so debilitating. So many parts of what you talked about i really related to. I have a really hard time with names and faces, my longterm memory in general is very poor and if you add disassociation on top of that its only worse. I always forget where i put things and i often pause or trail off while talking. I forget what i am saying midsentence a lot, especially where this is anything going on around me (noises, lights). I really appreciate you for posting this. Sending love and solidarity ❤

Thank you for being brave enough to talk about your struggles with this. Mine has been getting suuuuuper bad as of late and it's so hard. I used to be a freaking teacher... and now I can't even help my 4th grade daughter do her homework. It absolutely is a frightening thing to go through and I can honestly say I relate to almost every single symptom you brought up. Gentle hugs and many spoons, my sweet friend. ~Janessa

Thank you for publishing this I have CP and before watching your video I had no idea that I had similar things happen to me throughout my life. I now have my family watch this so they can understand or at least try to. The verbal abuse is what I struggle with the most. And now that I understand brain fog. I try not to beat myself up and wonder why people treat me that way because of my brain fog. I have to remember their own struggles as well and not be so harsh thinking towards them if that makes sense. And hope that one day they come around. Though I am not sure I’ll ever get I’m sorry for treating you that way because it’s seeing as weak if you apologize for past actions in my culture. I’ll be very happy If I can move forward and be happy but it still gonna be a long road but we’re making progress 🙂❤️

Honestly, thankyou for posting this, it makes me feel less alone I guess? Brain fog is one thing I don’t really discuss with people because I just find it uncomfortable to talk about (huge amount of internalised Ableism surrounding that here) x

Thank you for sharing this! I felt so alone, although I've heard others experienced similar. It was only by witnessing it that I truly could believe.

I just mentioned it on Twitter, but to share here too - I can completely relate to all of this, so thanks for sharing it and putting yourself out there for us all. The most immediate example though of how it affects me is how I had to re-watch several portions of this video to retain even the most straight-forward things you were talking about because I would just "glaze over" - or maybe black-out as you describe it. 20 minutes is just really long for me to get it all... although it's a perfect length to cover what you wanted to say and to make the wise choice about not editing any of it out.

Noticing decreased ability in masking because of chronic illness isolation is a thing I have very much found. Thank you for talking about this and it crossing over with brain for, especially because hard trauma stuff working through. I really struggle with focus and ability to think clearly or make any kind of sense. That I really call brain fog for me to. Processing stuff auditory or visually is overwhelmingly hard especially when one wants to.

Thank you so much for this honest video! I have made very similar experiences, being mentally ill since childhood and getting mercilessly bullied for it. And now that my physical illness get worse and worse i feel like my brain is gone and there's just a soggy foggy sponge left. I went from reading 100 books a year to... zero. Just can't concentrate, like you said i read the words but there is no sense reaching my brain. I remember tiny unimportant details, but forget big important things and tasks to do. Thank you so much for this video!

I deal with a lot of brain fog too. Some days are more heavily impacted than others, but for example it took me over an hour just to complete watching this video & typing this comment. On days (like today) where everything feels foggy & confusing, I just accept that things will get accomplished eventually and that life is not a race. I'm still going to accomplish my goals, even if I have to adjust the rate at which they get accomplished. The number one thing that I do to cope is to speak softly and repetitively to remind myself what I'm doing. If I'm walking from my bedroom into my kitchen to make a sandwich, I might say "I'm on my way to make a sandwich" over and over again. That way, (hopefully) I won't lose the thought before I get there, but if I do I can sometimes ask the folx around me who may have heard me say I was making a sandwich. It's maybe not the most practical approach in public because some people perceive talking to yourself as worrisome or threatening. I don't understand that, but I've been interrogated about talking to myself when I was simply trying to do math in my head or remember my shopping list. All that aside, it can at least be a helpful tool at home. I wish you peace and encouragement on your journey to self-acceptance & over coming internalized stigma or ableism. I applaud you for living as your best, most authentic self on the internet despite the haters! I wish we lived in a world where we didn't have to defend ourselves over everything too, but I have even more respect for you for putting yourself out there despite the ignorant judgements that some people may pass.

Thank you for this video. It is exactly what I needed to share to help people understand. I am going to feature you on my channel launch this weekend. Love and light and thanks again.

I can so relate! You put words out there to describe the way I feel. Thank you.

Great video. I just got diagnosed with Mild Cognitive Impairment. You've describe most of what I go through for the past few years, even the way you speak (with pauses) I do the same. They attribute my diagnoses due to my hydrocephalus. I've never heard of MCI until I got diagnosed. Thank you for awareness.❤️🤗😁

Hi Annie, I cannot describe how grateful I am to have found your video. I am at this point of breaking down, because I have no idea of what exactly is wrong with me. I am chronically ill myself but there are certain things I experience which even my psychiatrists or gastroenterologists cannot explain. I stumbled upon your video today and god, never have I felt so heard. Ever. I suffer with everything you mentioned - from processing sounds and information to the entire brain fog to maintaining eye contact and struggling in social contexts. I cried watching your video because I never realised that I may be neurodivergent - like I'm 28 yrs old and this very important piece of puzzle may have been kept away from me for so long! Thank you so so much for sharing your experience. I'm so sorry for all that you've gone through. No one deserves it. Lots of love to you ❤

I'm glad you left this video uncut, my EDS/fibro fueled brain fog affects me very similarly. I also find when it gets bad that I have to have long pauses in my speech as well just to find my bearings. Its like I get lost up in there sometimes and everything is kind blurry.

Thank you for posting this and talking about it! I have Idiopathic Hypersomnia and have been dealing with more and more cognitive dysfunction. Being only 28, it is indeed very embarrassing. I also have Charcot-Marie-Tooth disease so I've dealt with plenty of ableism and embarrassment and have processed through most of it. But I've only been diagnosed with IH for two years now though I've showed symptoms since childhood, and now that my cognitive dysfunction is more noticeable, I do find myself battling more internalized ableism, as well. Not sure if that made sense entirely lol but I say it to say that you, too, are not alone, and I applaud and admire you for being able to talk about it so publicly.

I was diagnosed with cognitive impairment a few years ago and no one ever really told me (or my parents) anything about it other than a very bare-bones definition and that I could get extra time on exams in high school and university because of it. I learned more about it in the first few minutes of your video than any doctor told me... The outbursts you talked about, the decaying ability to "mask" when not constantly doing it, forgetting things, not being able to understand words, blackouts I've experienced all of these and had no idea that was all connected to the cognitive impairment. the only thing I knew that was coming from that was the inability to concentrate on things, even things i'm interested in. thank you for making this video. it's comforting to know this is all normal parts of Brain fog.

Thank you! I use 'brain fog' for quite a while now. Mostly because I could have related to descriptions flowing through my Twitter TL. When I clicked the Vid, I was concerned, that I use brain fog incorrect as I haven't informed much. But as you go through your experiences, I can relate to very much of it. It's relieving. Going out speaking about things that scare, that are internalized and uncertain isnt easy. So I want you to know, that It has helped me very much. To make sense about these episodes. And to be confident in my self-assessment.

Thank you so much for this. I was placed on a vent a year ago ever since I woke up from my coma I've struggled with cognitive dysfunction. EVERYTHING you've described in this video is me and i cried watching this video because I felt relieved that someone knows how I feel someone gets it. My friends and family support me but that don't understand how much I struggle and mask

Annie, you are awesome! Also, you are apparently a friend of my daughter's, from some years back, on Tumbler, before youtube, while you were both being diagnosed for EDS. She says Hi : ) We both really relate to this video, very, very much! Wishing you the best! Gentle hugs~

I’m Dyspraxic and Autistic and I have brain fog. I relate to so much to this, I’m having a particularly bad day of it today. I’m actually getting emotional listening to you because of how much this all resonates with me

Whoa. When you mentioned remember names I literally thought to myself "I forget my best friend's name more often then I want to admit" and you do the same !! I can't even believe I'm not the only one. I suffer from a lot of your other symptoms too. Now I think I have it.

Thanks so much for this! I'm sharing with my students for the upcoming semester to help them figure out why I forget what I'm talking about all the time.

I'm just beginning my diagnostic journey and I always used to give myself such a hard time for not being able to remember/focus on normal conversations, and for completely forgetting whole situations. Thank you for putting this out there, it feels really great to know that you're not crazy. You rock 😊

I love you so much for making this video

Being bullied for having difficulties socializing with other people is something I can relate to. For years I wasn't able to tell if someone was being kind to me because they meant it or just because they were making fun of me. It's one of the most frustrating things I've ever experienced. So I built a wall around me to avoid being treated nicely to my face and mocked of behind my back. Thank you for your honesty, and for being and inspiration. It may sound ableist, but people like you and Jessica were my inspiration, the people I look up to when trying to give visibility to EDS in the Spanish-speaking community. Thank you very much for your honesty, it helps to destigmatize disability. Being ill or disabled is not bad, and isn't something we should keep to ourselves. We need to share it to make it more understandable to non-disable people, and to avoid ableism.

Woooow u hit home with me when u said POTS , ur a strong individual. I get that alot with the understanding ppl when they talk to you. 🙏🙏🙏 lots of love

I have cognitive disorder as well and I've also had trauma in my life and I never really understood how to put it in words or explain how I feel at times. So your video has helped me . I want to say thank you so much for making this video. The biggest thing I have is going through life everyday like it's a dream. I guess that's why it's called brain fog bc your always in a dream alot. And my childhood trauma was my mom dying when I was nine and alot of the time I still feel like that kid which is bad bc I'm 27 years old. I do forget things alot and my dad tells me I'm lazy sometimes or that I don't care about things. And it makes your brain foggier when something goes bad in my life and I feel like I can't handle it. I've never been around someone who has brain fog. It would really help if I knew someone who did so we can talk.

Thank you so much for sharing this. I also have EDS and POTS, so I also deal with brain fog, plus I'm autistic which creates extra difficulty with sound sensitivity, eye contact, and isolating what a person is saying from any background noise. Currently having a bad brain fog day so apologies if any of this is worded poorly or too bluntly. One thing that's helped me fight internalized ableism is focusing on the concept of "doing what I can with the mind and body that I have." Which is sometimes easier said than done, but focusing on that tends to help me be more accepting of myself and get frustrated less easily. All my diagnoses have helped with this because I can point to them and tell myself it's not my fault, I'm not lazy, I'm doing my best with what I have and that's what matters. Again easier said than done, some days, but repetition has helped. As for coping mechanisms, when I'm especially sound sensitive I'll wear ear plugs or headphones. When I'm brainfoggy and having trouble processing what people say, on TV I'll turn on captions, and in real life I'll do everything I can to help focus my best on their words. This usually means looking at something other than their face, stimming by fidgeting with my hands or fiddling with something in my hands, plus heavy use of scripts. If I still miss what they said, I'll either bluff or ask them to repeat or rephrase what it is they just said. If I'm extremely brainfoggy or stressed then talking tends to take too much effort, so I have a couple cards I can show people that explain I'm brainfoggy and thank them for understanding. Also cards that request something like to please leave me alone, or I'm overheating (thanks, POTS) and need help to cool down. None of them are perfect solutions for me but they do make things a bit easier.

Thanks for sharing your experience!

*OMGOSH.... All I can say right now is I Love you & Appreciate your story. You're telling my story. I call it a disconnect & hitting a wall. Not up to writing more than that right now. Thank you. I'm getting worse. See.... I say No too when I feel I'm wrong. Seeing 4 Dr's right now one is Finally a neurologist. Going for MRI with the MRA. I've subbed & look forward to watching more of your videos. I need to feel connected to others that suffer.🙏🙏🙏*

Annie thanks for sharing your heart.we that suffer from cognitive disorders will all get through this together,, one day at a time....bless you

I can relate to the vast majority of this!! Like almost everything you said. I find it SO hard, if not impossible, to tease apart what’s trauma-related dissociation and what’s chronic illness brain fog. I used to be able to compensate for most difficulties and I still try to because I feel so much of that ableist pressure to do so, but honestly it’s so exhausting to pretend and I really wish I didn’t have to at all. I, too, used to feel (still but especially when my POTS was completely unmedicated) that I wasn’t getting enough blood flow to my brain- and every other organ, for that matter- either causing or contributing to cognitive issues, and wondering how permanent those “losses” might be.

This video is soooo helpful. I'm going to show my partner this so he can understand better. I have C-PTSD, depression, agoraphobia, and chronic illness (autoimmune disease, pain, narcolepsy...) Often I struggle with brain fog and emotional fatigue. A lot of what you described also fits dissociation. I tend to get brain fog and dissociate when I'm having anxiety, something triggers flashbacks or traumatic memories, or I'm having a flare-up with my pain or illness. I blank out, stare off into space, can't hear or process words, can't speak or move (sometimes this is due to cataplexy) and if I do speak or move I'll stutter, trip over my words, tremble, fumble and drop things, speak too slowly, get confused or lost, can't remember things, black out, explode at people with emotions etc. My family members and partner are usually patient with me but sometimes they get "tired of me" or say they "can't deal with me right now" and ask me "can't you just calm down?" or do things that escalate the situation. I wish I could explain that I'M tired of it. Like really, you think I want to deal with it?! Cause I don't have a choice! I don't do it on purpose. Thank you for this video.

Thank you so much for this video. We will conquer this and overcome it.

My life right here. Thank you so much for sharing your experience

I needed to see this today!! You have managed to sum up my entire relationship with my brain! I have been experiencing "brain fog" for the last few months and have found it really hard to get across to the people around me the difference between "brain fog" and any number of situations which can give you the same type of symptoms. I am at university and feel the symptoms have escalated over these past few months due to the constant focus on work, it's like the more new information that I put in my brain the more useful knowledge I lose! I find myself forgetting basic words and when I speak my sentences become staggered as I forget what I'm trying to say. My short term memory/concentration is awful too meaning I'll often forget what people have said in a long story and end up very lost! It got me down at the beginning as I constantly felt like I couldn't keep up and really input in the conversations going on around me because my brain would have to work double time to understand! Text to speech software has become my best friend when reading and understanding is an issue. Audiobooks also take all the effort out of reading. Highly recommend!🙌🏼 I've learned to accept my "brain fog" as an extra perfect part of me! For me it presents when I have begun to overwork my brain and so now try to take it as a chance to practice self care to ensure I nurture my noggin... Thank you!❤️

I can definitely relate to a lot of this - forgetting names and interactions (I too have forgotten people I've met on multiple occasions), and processing difficulties in particular. (Also other stuff but my memory's too short right now to remember the specific points, but I'm fairly sure it was most of them....) It's led to me developing a bit of an airhead persona around my friends and casual acquaintances, like "haha isn't it cute how I can't remember basic things" because I don't want to admit how much I'm struggling. Also, re: the use of audio description and subtitles at the same time - I've started doing that recently as well! I can't stay focused on the screen for toffee, but I also have auditory processing issues. (Bonus points for constantly being told the names of characters - I really struggle to remember who's who, so having a voice tell me it's X walking into the room is fantastic.) Anyway thank you so much for making this video!

I was called stupid, too, alongside being praised for my intelligence (which makes no sense); told I had no common sense, asked “What’s wrong with your brain?” told “You’re too sensitive,” and bullied and emotionally abused. I have traits of autism though I don’t know if I am. It runs in my family, and I display many of the traits women do because of the erroneous belief that it’s a “boy’s condition.” I’m okay at eye contact so long as I’m not being emotional or am distressed. I didn’t realize that some of my behavior/movements could be stims. Part of me wants to see if that is my diagnoses; another wonders if I just want the validation.

Stay strong girl....Prayers for you.

most ironic and probably frustrating time for you to make this but very well illustrated of fog, bc this is how my brain sounds when tryin to like, work. i need to send this to people lmfao. (also watching this my foggy brain is totally here for it but adhd brain needs it on like 4x speed). ive had problems SO long w the memory and mini blackouts. gaslighting, forgetting your best friends or other important people. never remembering when you first met someone (or thinking the 5th meeting was the first). so often i just say "yeah i have a brain thing" because names and faces just slide off my brain lol. but i agree with most that part about not being able to articulate yourself well when thats supposed to be what you do bc I'm a communications major and sometimes i cant string a sentence together lol

Thank you so much for this.

Girl... yes. Yes, yes, yes. Fibrogirl here... I get you. I really do. Bring awareness of this to the MASSES! Brain fog is 85% of my 'you're too young for that' comments I get from the peanut gallery; the other 15% is references to my pain management and that I'm too young to experience constant bodily discomfort/pain. Thank you for sharing your perspective.

I can relate so much! I used to be able to completely mask any kinds of signs of my auditory processing disorder and other things, and I used to be able to concentrate for long times and remember things but over the last year or so it has gotten worse. My speech is bad, I often stutter and mess and mix up words and it can take me ages to even formulate a simple sentence and loads of people find it funny and take the piss which really doesn’t help. I can’t remember anything, I forget names of friends and I black out too which is probably one of the most frightening things when it happens cause I often don’t even know how long I’ve blacked out for or what I’ve done and it can be extremely confusing. It’s getting increasingly frustrating since I have a bunch of really important exams coming up and I have to remember so much, like I have to remember 20 ish equations for my physics test and it’s honestly impossible and even more frustrating with how not understanding people are. Thanks for the video, it makes me feel much less alone

Oh, man. Thank you for this. I forget that a lot of things I do that are "quirky" are actually my cognitive impairments acting up. It's so hard when so many people want to gaslight my experiences by saying things like "oh, everyone forgets things" and if I don't have a good therapist I tend to fall back into believing them. I've been having so many migraines lately and even deciding what to eat can send me info a total shutdown. I also have issues with comprehension like you've described here and I've never thought that it might be another symptom so I'm going to bring that up to my therapist and neurologist next time we talk.

Just finished. Thanks for posting this xD

Omg, the thing about things not registering, specially the reading part, is so relatable. Thankfully it's not as bad anymore as it was when my fatigue was at it's worst. Same for the blackouts omg.

ME TOO ME TOO!!!

You are amazing And telling my story!!!!!!! Thanks girl

Haven't finished the video yet, at the part where you talk about reading and holy moly I have the same issue. I've never been diagnosed with anything so it's completely possible that this is completely unrelated but! I'm an avid reader, but occasionally when I read it feels like I'm reading a list of vocabulary words instead of a sentence. Like I sound the words out, I can identify them and know their meaning, but the sentence doesn't make sense. It's like reading: Brown helicopter right face equal. Instead of a sentence that actually flows and makes sense. Hopefully that makes sense. I've also always had issues with making sentences when talking. I know what I want to say and then randomly a word grows wings and flies away and I'm stuck there like "wtheck! Come back!" 😐

it took a bit to put two and two together, but I just realized you were on SMNTY the other week!

I can relate to this as an Autistic person, some thing are going to be different, some will be the same, my advice would be to keep on being honest about your neurodivergence, my expirence of trying to hide my Autism is very bad because, it made me very tired, no where near a bad as you have with chronic illness of course, it also caused the bad parts such as hitting and biting myself to be worse because I had to bottle it all up, in other words avoiding stims like hand flapping and swaying when I needed them. You are NOT ugly or stupid you are an amazing person who makes informative and articulate videos and posts (apologies if that bit appears creepy). I also understand that neurodivergence is much harder for you as a woman of colour than it is for me as a white man. I hope what I have said is ok. In terms of coping mechanisms the best thing to do after a bad day is to stim somewhere you feel comfortable then eventually be able to do it as soon you need to, I would also advice indulging in things you love for me this would be car related stuff I spend ages watching motorsport, I also enjoy watch the cars go past my house, I like listening to my favourite music as well for me these are ladyhawke and Breaking Benjamin.

I can absolutely relate to the reading problem. I used to read a lot and now on a good day I can read a couple pages. I get stuck on one line repeating it over and over ,forgetting it every time. It's absolutely frustrating and it made it impossible for me to pass my exams. I hope I can get a little bit of my cognition back so I can someday get a degree. Many of the other things you talked about sounded very familiar too.

yes, all of this. it's so so hard especially with other people. be kind to yourself. it's not your fault, you are enough.

Thank you so much for sharing! I know it must have been extremely hard. I found your video at 530 in the morning when I typed in a search "jobs for neurodivergent". I can't continue my current job because of severe physical health issues and covid, and I have to look into other options. Unfortunately, I'm kinda am back where I started at 19....much is limited as I have memory, brain fog issues, and get confused with a lot of information at once, I kinda "space out" (as I have been told) and I get overwhelmed and my brain kinda..."shuts down", I start to "doublespeak" "fumble words" and such, I have learned/forced ways to mask and navigate speaking to people, doing a task, learning information and such....but if I have an "off day" it''s super noticeable by clients and coworkers that I'm " A bit off". I don't have a diagnosis, I am only just learning at 36 that many adults have these issues and have found ways to cope and that really opens up a lot of hope to find a way.

Can definitely relate to some of this, I'm also very conscious of my vocabulary and such. Although I don't have trouble expressing myself online, when I talk with people I have a tendency to sometimes mix up words, and pronounce words in unusual ways or change where I put the emphasis, and my grammar pedant dad would sometimes go out of his way to explain what I said wrong, even though I knew it had nothing to do with what I did or didn't know. Sometimes my brain just does unusual things is all. I don't have the same neurology and stuff as you, but I do still find brushing teeth, exercise, chores, cooking and concentrating on reading/planning exhausting. Afraid I don't have many coping mechanisms though :/

Thank you so much. I've been bringing this up to my family and my doctor for about 6 years. On my own, I have found names for some of my symptoms. Nominal aphasia has been really embarrassing for me. I have a decent vocabulary, and I've always been "intelligent," but I cannot hold a conversation without stopping midsentence to say "I've lost the word. I'm sorry, my brain just broke." And I am hopeless at remembering names or recognizing people in different circumstances. Especially at work, I catch myself headed somewhere without knowing why, or I realize that the direction I was heading wasn't the one I intended. It's not unusual for me to stop walking and say, "This isn't where I'm meant to be." I have had several episodes of confusion in which I'm not sure which of the things in the medicine cabinet I meant to put on my toothbrush, from acne spot treatment to frizz control. While driving, I frequently come back to myself not knowing how I've gotten as far as I have, often not recognizing where I am right away even though I have driven the same route every day. I have a little burst of panic trying to figure out where I am and how I got there, only to realize that I'm on my normal route home or to work, just as I was meant to be. I only recently found out that I am neurodivergent, and it made so many things make sense to me. Now I'm wondering if my cognitive impairment is related to my JHS or my neurodivergence. The worst thing about all of it is that even though my husband is the one I cry to about my fears regarding dementia or brain damage, his reaction when he sees me doing something that doesn't make sense or when I accidentally use a wrong word, still thinking I said the word I had scripted, is to laugh at me and make me feel stupid. You're right: it's not a very likable word.

You are doing the best you can. I'm going through the same thing exactly. It's scary and frustrating

Wow relateble alot! I am also forgetting lots of stuff... And suck at work people think i am disabled... Thanks for this video

For the past 4-5 years, I have been experiencing all of this to a frequent and consistent degree especially the inattention and time blackouts. I have to be stimulated when I'm reading/listening, but it doesn't necessarily help me comprehend or retain focus better; I'm just not bored. I attribute it to my depressive disorder and anxiety disorders. I also had a childhood of ableist violence while being undiagnosed. I was more so a quiet, reserved kid with obvious, unconventional behaviors, like, my collecting pictures of my favorite characters and organizing them into certain folders then carrying all those folders in my book bag to school with me everyday, or how when I got used to my schedules I struggled a lot when I had to adapt to something new (e.g somebody will suddenly talk to me and I'd momentarily get lost or be late to where I was going, there was something I needed to do else where that made me forget and consistently retrace my previous patterned schedule, etc). My struggle with attention was never this bad as a kid. It just started getting bad ever since I started HS lol But I think my inability to take a test has always been a thing. I can't give presentations without losing track of time, spacing my words, forgetting a word I know, speaking entirely too low (this is actually a big thing for me lol), and having the usual physiological anxiety symptoms. Thank you for posting this video. I need to remember to not post about myself because I just go on endless rants, but also hearing someone share a lot of the same symptoms and experiences as me really helps me.

OMG. The Chalie Brown analogy is one I've used. X

I relate to so much of what you said, but every time I go to the doctor and explain all of the difficulties I have with memory, concentration, etc., they tell me there's nothing wrong with me or it's depression. I never experienced feelings of depression until I began having these issues, though, and none of the antidepressants or therapy I've tried over the past 12 years has made it any better. I don't know what to do. Life is so hard.

Thank you so much for posting such an honest video! I'm neurodivergent too, but I'm still trying to figure out whether I experience brain fog or dissasociative episodes. Do you know any tips or ways to tell them apart?

I can relate with most parts of ur video. I am struggling with my work coz of comprehension issues and am completely directionless

Thanks for posting this. I have autism so I get a lot of brain fog. I'll be able to form sentences perfectly in my head, but the words won't come out of my mouth and I go mute, or the words come out jumbled. It's really embarrassing and I've been accused of being drunk or high. This happened once when a cop pulled me over for running a stop sign, and he thought I was drunk and made me take a sobriety test. It was really scary.

"people can notice it a bit more" I literally accidentally just yelled "YES!" just now because of this, and had to pause the video to write to say that I absolutely 100% get this and you are not alone.

This is so hard for me I have a tarot channel too that I struggle with cause of these issues. I have been thinking of it a lot. I love your courage thank you for sharing.

I also have cognitive impairment. I also really have a hard time reading. I can’t comprehend anything I read. I often have to read the same sentence again and again to understand it. I always had to have tests read to me. And I will forget my words too and I have episodes where I will dissociate. It’s awful. I love that you made a video on this subject! I can relate to most of this!; Hugs!!

You are not alone. I also suffer from brain fog, and i have narcolepsy. It's been really hard coping with it and i feel alienated because of it. Anxiety and confusion makes it even worse because i'm always afraid of being missunderstand by others, as well as them missunderstanding me. Anyway, Thank you for being open and honest. Bringing awarness to those who may not understand how debilatating this is. -Holly

I’m still super conscious of telling people about my Auditory Processing Disorder where I lie and say that my ears are bad or that I can’t hear rather than explain that my brain can’t process what you’re saying. I’m afraid people will think I’m stupid so I don’t really tell people. I know I’m not and I shouldn’t be bothered by it but I was told as a kid that no one would be my friend if they knew. I’m only saying this because I also get embarrassed when people start talking jibberish to me when I know that I should understand them and I keep asking them to repeat. Yeah.

I am autistic and I have cognitive impairment due to an undiagnosed chronic illness. This resonates with me so much

I feel this.... I've never had a good memory, or focus, and I've had a lot of these experiences. Including forgetting my best freinds name who I had legit known since 2nd grade. When I was in high school. I have also had experiences with emotional abuse, so it also really ties in with dissasociation. I described it to my therepist as if there were cotton in my head, and supposedly the really intense sensation of fog is my dissasociation when my mind is super fatigued from anxiety or depression or trama. So for the fog feeling using coping skills for dissacociation may help a bit. As for memory and concentration I got nothing and it's one of the things I most struggle with. My roomate and I are constantly perplexed how random things were put in the complete wrong spot, when I made food, how I didn't notice things were dirty... she has to tell me things so many times and supposedly we have had many conversations many times and I cannot ever remember them. Supposedly one night I asked her twice if She had eaten even tho I saw her eat dinner. She will tell me we met someone or did something and I can't ever place it. Luckily she has learned to be patient with me, and that I am trying but at first it was really hard b/c she is fairly neurotypical and didn't understand how the level of dysfunction I had (esp. When I wasn't getting treatment) was possible. The only thing that remedies it is a ridiculous amount of planning and to do lists. I log everything in my phone as soon as I think of it, and then I have (over the span of over 9 months, maybe? ) built a habit of checking it. Then, I go in and log it in a Google calender and plan out my whole week in advance using the to do lists(like legit every minute). It isnt perfect, and I still forget a lot, especially in social situations. And I'm lucky in that I had a family member willing to Skype with me 3 times a week to remind me and enforce the habits so they could form. Most of the time I will totally forget what I put on the calender despite checking it again and again. But the good thing about it is I can check my phone as much as I want. At my office job I can't use my phone, so I use copious amounts of systemetised sticky notes to compensate for memory. It's definately not a fix for the actual mental dysfunction, but it keeps (most) of my asighnments and bills turned in with some help. The only thing I have learned to do is systemetize as much as I can. Once I am able comprehend a task (and that alone can take some time) I write down how to do it step by step, I Wright down rules for myself and only focus on one small rule or task at a time. Like one time I had to measure things on paper, so I made a color coded key and highlighted the things I measured according to the step I was on. That way, when I (repeatedly) got confused on what I was doing and what I needed to do and what I had already done it was all in frount of me. It takes a hell of a lot of time and energy, to constantly have to figure out where to pick up again in again, but it's the only way I was able to cope. I should also note that these things are all tools I learned in a hostile environments to hide my mental illnesses and trama and dysfunction, so I apologise if there is some internalized ish. These things have always been used against me too so I defs feel u there. Anywho, thanks for sharing this, I feel a lot less alone ❤ You are wonderful and brave and beautiful. I am grateful for you sharing your experience and hope this maybe helped a bit? Idk maybe not. If nothing else know you are valid and you are not alone.❤

I have fibro/etc but brainfog is so hard. I lose my words. I can't hear a convo in a crowd. Large warehouse type stores is where I blank out and lose time. So frustrating. Thank you for being real.

I’m going through this and it is heartbreaking it literally tears me apart I struggle talking I barely can listen to this without forcing my brain to focus

Don’t just want to give her a huge hug.

I go through episodes of brain fog due to my undiagnosed chronic illness. I will get instances where I can't focus, where I will have a thought and instantly forget it, and where words won't make sense to me anymore. One time I was working on a lab report really late and it took me three hours instead of half an hour because I could not focus at all. I looked at the wrong data for half an hour and once I was looking at the right data words barely made sense anymore and then I was crying alone at 2 AM in my dorm's lounge out of sheer frustration and it sucked. Luckily my episodes of brian fog are fairly infrequent, but they're still a symptom I deal with and they're really scary.

I'm autistic and always struggled with my memory and concentration. I lose things all the time, forget to do things, etc. My father was and is extremely verbally abusive towards me for that. He made me feel so disgusting and like I couldn't do anything right.I never thought it could be brain fog. I just felt so broken because I couldn't keep track of things. My dad always made me feel bad because of that. Even as an adult it still bothers me. I'm going to try to work on accepting myself more. I'm glad to know that I'm not alone.

Thank you so much for this video. It was super informative and real. Could anyone explain to me the main differences between cognitive impairment and dissociation? Thank you

I have the same thing!!!!!! I often forget how old I am and have to ask my family to figure it out! I also couldn't remember my best friends for a full month after I meet her. It's so hard to communicate with other people when I can't talk about people with other people. I also used to place my phone in the exact same place every time I set it down, but I could never remember where I put it and would search over my entire house for it. I am often made fun of for never remembering their names, it's kind of a joke in my friend group and I don't know how to tell them to stop. It really sucks

I have found that using technology and social media too much has had a significant impact on my concentration and focus abilities. I reasonably often find myself having to mentally double check that I have got someones name correct before I speak to them. It is also often harder to recall information and maintaining the flow of a conversation is sometimes quite difficult. I am only 30 and I feel like my brain has deteriorated a lot over the last year or so. Combining that with hypochondria type thinking and the physical and mental effects of anxiety it can be very difficult to make sense of things.

There are so many people I really do like, even for years, without ever fully getting their faces or names. Often the combination of location, voice, their style, and the way they talk to me, those will remind me that I'm talking to someone I know and like (even if not specifically which one). But.. I'm pretty sure most of them see me as someone who doesn't care enough to remember. :/ Thanks again, sorry for all the comments. This one hit home bad.

I know it's hard on you . But, how long you had this???? I still think you're awesome!!!

How can people be so cruel... as if they had the insurance that they would never fall low once in their life. It could happen to anyone at any age. I personally started going through this. I'm in my twenties and in the recent years I have been consistently feeling things like what you described. I am taking antidepressants for 7 years now, and their long term side effects affected my cognitive abilities, especially speaking. I can't find the words anymore. I stop midway because I forget the beginning of what I said and the sequel to what I want to say. l feel like I am betrayed by my own self. Antidepressant also makes me constantly tired and sleepy a lot. A lot of sleep also makes my brain even more damaged. My faith in God is the only thing that still keeps me hopeful, that one day all of this will get better.