I'm 43 years old and I have no friends. 

I am 45 years and no friends. Just special friends i need for particular ideas change for sport, boxing, business or just small talk. Not even my family members are my friends, because they care more for other people on street than me. The biggest scam are smoking friends. In my age men like me really only care about their financial situation.

I'm 49 and have ZERO friends. Some people will say the same thing, but a few minutes later in the same convo, they'll say "and my friend from highschool...". Wait, I thought you said you had no friends, lol!! I literally have NO friends. I own my own home in the suburbs, and nobody comes to my house and I don't go to anyone's house. If I die in my shower, no one will find me for days.

Wow. The timing of this video is spot on. I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. And I agree with what you’re saying John. I’m 26 and still developing as a man but I realize the more I growth, the less friends I have. And like you said, the type of friends that I want to build relationships with are all operating at high levels and rarely have time for anything else besides work and family. Crazy part is, I’m nowhere near where I want to be in life but my dreams are so big that 99% of the people I meet on this journey just don’t meet my standards to make friends with.

In my 40s with no friends, a deliberate choice that has proven one of my best decisions. Cutting off connections to focus on self, especially after raising my grown child. The peace I've found is truly priceless!

I've had 4 friends die in the past 7 years. Realize you always have to be seeking many friends otherwise, you will end up alone. My friends have different interests. I like that. I still can be friends with them. I go to lunch with at least 2 friends per month. Being totally alone is like smoking 15 cigarettes per day. Bad for your health.

I agree, im 26 and struggle with this, people who I thought are ride or dies turned out to be fakes and selfish people at the end. And nowadays a lot of my “friends” are acquaintances or people who I talk with about my career. I suppose im good at networking but its always been a challenge to let people in and have a meaningful conversation at times

It's difficult in the 40s. People are busy, families (with kids), different values, responsibilities, less patience, past pain experiences, etc. An immediate connection of rapport must take place to transcend the issues. Also, there is a stigma of sharing feelings with other men unless he is an old time connected friend.

Similar situation here. I started out in life with lots of friends, but as the years go by, people move, they get busy with life, interests change. I think if you're a "grow where you are planted" kind of person, that also keeps their interests very mainstream, it is easy to keep early life friendships going indefinitely. However, if you're creating a meaningful life on a different path, people tend to drop off. For me, I just don't have to time, energy, or inclination to put into keeping these types of relationships alive. They payoff just doesn't seem to be there for the energy expended. I couldn't care less about sports, so that removes a lot of the common interests that men share. The men I would share interests with are also out making their dent in the universe. I imagine someday, when we are all a lot older, and have accomplished what we set out to do, we may all get together on a beach somewhere and catch up on all the social connections missing in the solitary grind years.

I'm 39 and have been a remote-based freelancer for over 15 years. Prior to that when I used to work in an office, I didn't really vibe with the corporate ladder-climbing culture of most of my co-workers so I didn't really have many friends even then. Always been a bit of a lone wolf, although I can be very gregarious and extroverted when I want to be! I used to be a heavy drinker & outgoing partier, and am now 4-years sober. Going sober is the best thing I've done for my health, but that put a big dent in my social circle, no doubt. But like you said, most of that circle were just "drinking buddies." We had a lot of fun and they were good people, but no one I would call on in the time of need. Now, post-covid, what close friends I did have moved away, got married, had kids, etc - such that I can't say I have too many friends left, and it's hard going on 40 to make new ones. I've come to a place of acceptance with it, it doesn't really faze me, but I admit it would be nice to have a few more people I could kick it with in person.

To all of your struggling with this, try taking up hobbies, classes (ie yoga, self defense, acting, improv, etc), social clubs, organizations and sports leagues that align with your interests. You’ll meet like minded people there.

The moment I started being successful I had to pretty much shut down to my friends because I couldn't talk to them anymore about me. Anything I would say about myself would sound like bragging, I tried in the beginning and I could tell how uncomfortable they would get. So the friendships I have are kinda shallow in the sense that I don't share much about myself. Same for family. Nobody but my wife knows how successful I am.

I've found a lot of comradery and friendship when I started to train Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Highly recommend for any fellow man :) There is a 55 year old I know that does it and he's good at it, so don't think your age should stop you.

Status and age make friends more distant.. don't worry, you have friends they're probably just busy for now. I always thought I lost my brother as a friend for a long time, that's always been self-hating bullshit. You made mistakes in life, you're human. Peace be with you.

Im 40 and i got no friends. Dont really want them. I just fish on my weekends. Work. I talk to my coworkers but would never ever hang out with them. I dont have any social media except for youtube. At 40 im just tired of being around people.

It wasn’t weird. It was slightly obvious I looked at John’s advice and there were 2 places that he isn’t super strong at: 1. Making friends 2. Building a business that’s bigger than just him Both aspects are social so that represents a huge growth opportunity that he has the skills and infrastructure to capitalise on

great video. I feel the same way, I stopped drinking and lost the majority of my friends. I was a bartender in San Diego for over 10 years and getting out of the industry and not drinking anymore has completely secluded me from my main friend group. I would like to find a group of buddies who are killing it in business who I see a few times a month. Love the content bro keep up the good work

Too real bro... We are struggling silently, having friends in an EXCEPTION

My true friends can be counted on one hand and not all fingers. I’ve always been that way. My problem is that I can’t relate to most people. Plus, I never felt that I needed too many fiends.

I am 29 and all of my friends moved away (1 is coming back soon). I honestly don't have the time and energy to have friends the same I was 20. I prefer having very few friends, so I can I work on my skills. Even having 2-3 friends takes so much time to handle. It is not easy when you have to work full time, commute, study new technologies etc. Also every year that passes I enjoy my loniless more in the point I crave it. I need to spend time alone.

Gave up on my friends as I realized they were merely acquaintances. If the words you say to one another is just superficial and there is no emotional connection, its an acquaintant not a friend.

I agree with all of your points. You're not the only one who feels this way. None of my close friends live near me so I rely on sports leagues to meet new people. I like your points about real friends vs drinking buddies. I don't need the people I'm hanging around to be super elite, but I'm also not trying to surround myself with complete degenerates. Currently trying to determine the right balance between solitude and socializing!

It seems to me that in USA this phenomenom of working your ass off and not having time to develop meaningful connections is quite common. In south Europe where I am from people tend to value family, friends and spending time with them more than chasing career and money. That's probably why USA is more rich than the EU or Europe in general. Life is short, you can't have everything, actually you can't have a lot of things so one needs to choose wisely what to prioritize and also when, because when you are +40 it's really hard to make new true friends. Friendships needs a lot of time to develop.

Your video yesterday about being truly alone with illness/serious health problem which I've had since 18, it was fantastic I don't know if you've been through anything like that (I hope not) but you articulated it with an understanding that was beyond what I usually see ANYWHERE. Thanks.

My former drinking friends are the people I get along best with, even when sober. When you're drunk, you no longer have a mask on and it's easier to find people who share the same values and principles. In addition, there are the often extraordinary shared experiences from unreasonable nights of consumption. My alcoholic period had many downsides, but the friends from back then seem to remain.

Loving this new style of raw videos!

I’m 52 I have acquaintances,some friendships I had to end for my own peace of mind ,you are all you need in life

51, completely housebound, autistic, chronic illness, actually zero friends. Not even distant friends I talk to let alone spend time with and do anything with. I see no one. Except on video. HI INTERNET FRIENDS. 👋😬😞

Im from 82. And I came to the same conclusion as you did. I quit using drugs in July 2022, and therefor I needed to cut of the people involved in that too. So to make a long story short, I dont have anyone left that I hung out with. Its something positive that brought a lot of negatives too. Sometimes I even like to think life was more fun in the drug abuse times than now, ironically. But I try to stay strong to that shit. I want to see my children grow up and be there for them. Cant be in this toxic environment anymore.. 🙏🏾

I have learned late in life that friends you do activities with and that you can share things that are happening in your life are important. I have 2 really good friends who I connect with that I can be completely honest and straightforward and pray with when needed. I agree with you John. There are some things you should share dudes and not your wife or girlfriend. I had to learn to make the time. These friends keep me on the narrow road too and not stray. Iron sharpens iron. Brian Taylor Oceanside

This has been some deep real talk. I'm in the same boat.

Friends are problems - Dan Pena.

you don't have to be friends with people who are on the same level as you. anyone can be a friend no matter where you're at in your career or job or something.

You're right ... social activities bring people together. Struggling to keep connections, so making a good habit of socializing in sports is a gateway. btw I love people, not their obligations.

Not having any friends is pretty common for entrepreneurs and remote based workers.. especially for the ones who have moved away from their hometown. I've moved around the country and in and out of the country so all of the friends that I have either live in a different state or a different country. The key for me has been to stay connected to my core group of friends (can count on one hand) while at the same time reaching out and trying to deepen the connection with other cats that I get to know through my online business. I'm on a pretty tight time schedule right now but will be seeing the light by the time summer 2024 hits. At that point I'll re-engage with different activities local activities. Making friends when you're an adult is a helluvalot harder than when we were kids. You just have to be focused and determined about it.

I’m 50 never married and no kids. I have no real friends mainly just work associates but nothing outside of work. I’m a loner by nature and I have always preferred my own company. Having friends is overrated.

I’m 45. I have no good friends. My good friends are either depressed or busy in family life. Can we all folks with no friends meet and become friends?

John you can definately find people from your group, and do a monthly trek with the boys over a weekend trip in to the mountains and the forests. You must make an effort if you want to resolve this issue, and you can find the time if you are serious. Furthermore, in the past many men always aloocated time to fraternities outside of their family, and this is very helpful. PS. You could also partly automate your business as well.

When you get to the age of about 27, true “friendships” drop off. People who make good money and have a significant other don’t really need these true friendships any longer, so I think that’s why. You get by in life with just your basic family unit, so there’s no need to include other people in it. Nowadays people are obsessed with success and money, and finding true friends with that obsession in the mix doesn’t work. Activities have a lot of people you can be friends with, but they’re relegated to that particular activity. Outside of the activity, people are less likely to want to hang out. Church/religion seems to be a good place to have friends, but once those people interact with you outside of the confines of the church, it’s the same stuff as stated above. People don’t just want to hang and talk anymore, that’s something only single poor people do 😂

Due to life happening, my best friend and I currently live 2000 miles apart and therefore can’t go for runs or workout together like we used to, but we call each other at important times, and the deep bond of trust, acceptance, understanding, and honesty that we have for each other is something we both treasure. I wish I had advice to offer on how to build such a relationship, but aside from discernment of good character, really it’s a choice. I will stand up for this person and have their back and I will trust them to do right by me when I am low or seek advice or council. I may not always take the advice, but having a true friend is one of the best things in life.

Me neither. 43. It's lonely. I have no sisters, brothers, not married, no kids,..

You’ve got Mani and Me bro!!! Much love Brother

While I'm not super successful, I do OK for myself and I've noticed a similar pattern with my friends. As I got more involved with work, the relationships I had when I was younger became more distant. One thing that helped me meet new people at my level and beyond was just picking up a semi-expensive hobby. For some people it could be golfing, cars, hunting, etc. I ride motorcycles. It's cheap enough that most people that commit to it can get into it yet many successful people do it too. I'm 29 but have friends who are much wiser and further along than me because we share the passion for riding. That's just my 2 cents.

I'm the same age. I have friends in my home town. But I moved 10 years ago and learned how hard it is to find friends when you move to an area where you don't have any friends for family. That and I'm a divorced with no kids. So most of the men my age are like John. They don't want to really hang out when they have free time, they'd rather be with their families. If the do things, it's usually in groups with other parents so their kids can play.

I'm 54 and have no friends I struggled with making friends all my life I don't know what I am doing wrong

Someone told me that drinking buddies are usually not friends. The truth is that if you saw your drinking buddies outside of boozing activities, you usually dont have much in common.

The no-time thing is real until you realise there is no more time and that friend has passed away. There is time, but this is a question of priorities.

Hitting 40 next year and same boat. Moved to a new city, no friends, don't party or drink anymore. I'm working out and trying to upskill while my 'friends' are in other cities driving electric cars, farting into the couch, and letting their wives be the bread winners. I have nothing in common with them and haven't seen them in years.

I'm 41 years old and I don't have any friends to hang out with either. I am also financially free and barely need to work. I want to meet a group of guys like me. I live in Houston.

Dom Toretto “I don’t have friends, I have family.”

I was the most loyal friend. Turns out I wasted alot of time and money and more.... To be betrayed at the end. Not worth it. Way overrated.

Count all the likes You see, people are behind you and yes it's sad we don't living together but we are together spiritual alright

I think it’s very important to have and maintain male friendships particularly if you’re in a romantic relationship. There are just some things you need to be able to speak with and connect with other men about. Regarding the “drinking buddies” I’ll offer an opinion on how to filter them. Start by being vulnerable…that’s very difficult for most men to be like that with other men. Talk about real things you’re struggling with and issues you have - we all have much more in common in those areas than we’d like to believe. You’ll know pretty quickly if that guy checks out of the conversation because he’s uncomfortable being vulnerable. There’s your answer for that individual. Any guy can talk to any other about sports or cars or whatever but few can talk about serious issues face to face.

Nice you are keeping it real , I like your newer videos

Im also 43. All my friends got married or are dating and has been like this for over 20 years...

Good truths. … if you need a friend reach out, we’re here for you. 💪

I'm 30 cut off all old friends and most of my family members whom don't resonate with the value I have now days. maturity really makes you understand to just focus on yourself and be happy in this "it is what it is" mindset.

I don't agree with statement that to be friend you have to be at the same level. That is plain ego.

It’s not just men. It’s women too.

Similar situation...im 36, 4 kids a spouse, i am the sole earner. In and out of family court for 11 years. Its always feels like i have no time or energy to have friends let alone go out and make them. The free time and energy i have, ispend it with my kids. I plan to join an archery club and go from there

Join The War Room

Hell, im 51 and drifted away ftom my friends over the years Now, im at thr point in my life where allni need is my wife and children Its by choice because i realzied thebolder i got that having friends was over rated Most of the times friends are more trouble than they are worth lol

I'm 26 and I have only one true friend. We have known each other for 14 years and he is like a brother to me. We've been through our best and our worst together. I trust him with my life. Even tho we don't live in the same town any more we regularly call each other and schedule in person time. Other than him I don't have anyone.

Listen... Im 43 also barely have any friends and I dont care... I use to have a lot of friends before they started to give me trouble or take advantage of me... Once I started my own family and same for them we went separate ways. I rather be with my family now then with my 43 year old friend that still thinks hes the coolest rapper ever...

Hey in this fast moving world and also generally in life it’s extremely difficult to find true meaningful friends who can understand, really count on during your bad/rainy days.. As the saying goes “In your entire life, you can probably count your true friends on 1 hand” Nothing to worry about 😅

I am a 46 year old woman, and I'm too busy to have friends. All my time i spend at work and most importantly time with my family. I'm happy and that is all that matters to me.

Hey Bro, not to sound cheesy, but I'll be your friend(although I'm in Florida, never been to Cali). I respect your channel a lot because of your authenticity. -Corey Bett

Everyone prefers different things 🙂 I have multiple friend groups and a lot of close friends but yet again I’m single so it’s kind of a must if you want to eventually find someone

I'm 29 and have no friends. I'm perfectly fine though. I love my solidarity, but it would be cool to have a bro to have some manly connection. Unfortunately, many of the guys I've met aren't at my level. Many of them lack ambition. Their definition of ambition is "climbing the ladder" in their job/field and relying solely on a 401k. Or maybe buying a house but not paying it off by 40/50. The others that are more ambitious don't have time because they're trying to get ahead which I understand. You sometimes have to put in a few extra hours sometimes.

Let me tell you all YOU HAVE FRIENDS WATCH AROUND Means, physically??? Do you need physically some "friends" Man, people have to grow... It's the light... The real light You have more friends than you think

the only thing worse than no friends? Is being backstabbed by those who claimed to be your friends. When its family? its even worse. People are transactional and selfish to a point where "friends" dont exist. Im older than John, it used to not be this way. If a guy like this has no friends? Then it's epidemic

You make time for friends. No matter how so called “busy.” Once people have kids, that’s usually a rap on the social life for men.

This is what happens when you listen to your mind that always gives negative thoughts. Instead listen to your heart when making relationships. Otherwise you'll never make relationships with people. And will be lonely forever! As a man close male friendships are the most important part of our lives.

I have many friends, all of them are successful entrepreneurs in different fields with different skills. I think it's a must to have a strong circle like this, what do you do when you need advice on a field you don't have a clue about? I ran 3 businesses with my friends and we made good money together, I feel like for some reason you are avoiding having friends John, I think it's a must for anyone to have good male friends. I hope you can take my word on it and find a group of people your level you can connect with

*I'm 19 year old And ഐ have No Friends and Have Clinical Depression😢*

I'm 35, and I don't have any friends. ... All is well ☕.

SAME. No friends! I'm too busy to invest my time not related to money making activities

I'm 39 yrs old and i have no friends, i live in complete seclusion, i go out maybe 2 or 3 time maximum during the summer , i spend all the year alone inside my appartment. Been living this way for over a decade now ,it's hell.

It’s because everyone only wants to be friends that are at a higher level than them

I miss the 1990s when we used to call people on the telephone. We had a handful of people we called every day, and who called us back. I never wanted cell phones but women wanted them because they thought they were getting more attention.

"At that level" is a red flag on your character.

Not to make this a huge tangent, but church or other religious institutes are the traditional place for men to find men on the same journey. This is not to say everyone there is a "good friend" but it's where people go who share a large decision making factor A little disclosure, AA has been the best place for me to meet men interested in helping others improve their lives and there is an unofficial phrase "Stick with the winners"

yup same here, 38 no friends, used to have a lot of them though, well if I can call them friends :D

Thats why sports and common interests are used to make friendships. No one usually is "higher" up than the other, and if they are it's basketball, who cares.

I have so many friends I could talk endlessly about it

After stopped smoking weed I am living a "lonely" life

John, I think you are being to hard on yourself. If you read most of the post here most are in a similar situation such as yourself. Even myself find myself in a similar situation like yourself. To be honest? I think the reason why this maybe the case is because it is due to the times we live in. We live in an age of the digital social media where friends are avatars of someone else hiding behind a game character or a tweeter feed. Everything seems or feels generic. I kind of miss the old days when kids would go outside and play stick ball and the most entertainment at home was the Atari 26 hundred.

It's kinda sad that pretty much the only activity bonding friends is getting high together..

Hell, I'm 20 years old and I have no friends. I mean... I workout, go to Muay Thai, manage my business, go out to party sometimes... I think the problem is that people want a kind of a high school or college friendship when they're in any of the above.

No I don't have a lot of friends but I have a song for you to play for it's hard to be humble when you're perfect in every

And Andrew T said it You don't need thousands of fake friends and all that BS Have few, 1 or 2, that's enough and okay

This is an "American" and "North america" problem. Almost any other country I've been to and lived in I've had a ton of friends but not Canada/US. The culture here is just different and not condusive to true friendships. John go to Turkey your home country and see how many friends you'll gain in such a short span of time. You'll be amazed.

Join the club…most middle aged men dont

What do you think about Andrew Tate's the war room?

I have 1 good friend. we have the same interest in the same type of music and same creative interest. We have been friends for about 8 years. However he is married with 2 kids and Im not. so Ill see him like once a year.

Same bro... feeling so lonely sometimes

You might consider searching for a millionaire's club or group in your area. I am sure you could make some successful, real friends in your money bracket there. Real friends improve the quality of life and you need that now...friends are essential they are a necessity of life for everybody, wealthy and poor alike. Real friends help you to grow, point out your blind spots, don't make judgements and are a gainful support through life.

I'll be your friends

I am 38 but don't have friends in my age.

I'm 41 and My phone hasn't rung in years

I'm 34 years old and I have no friends. I eat raw meat 🥩