If you have been BETRAYED, you need to know THIS 

"Anyone who has been in a narc relationship has been betrayed" - hit that nail again!

It takes seconds to break a trust. It takes years to build. And forever to repair

The thing I hate about betrayal trauma is that it leaves you scared that you will get hurt by flying monkeys if you ask others to protect you from the narcissist in your life. I never told my narcissistic exs parents half of what he did to me in private. It's scary how much fear and terror a person can endure alone when he or she doesn't know who to trust. Hugs to all survivors of narcissistic abuse.

Betrayal definitely can have a long-lasting, devastating effect on your life. Sometimes, betrayal is outright calculated and absolutely criminal.

My X narcissist lied and used my compassion for 30 years. I will never be ok. 😳

Frequently my mother betrayed me. I think it made her feel powerful. In fact, feeling invigorated teaming up with my siblings, together would all betray me. She standardized the lifelong treatment to me.

The word betrayal is a synonym for abuse in the context of a narcissistic relationship. When the narcissist is a parent or an intimate partner it's chronic betrayal that with time negatively effects your physical and mental health, and robs you of your sense of self, self worth and ability to trust others and yourself. It's soul crushing pain.

Been betrayed for a very long time. Probably why I have difficulty trusting anyone especially if they claim they care about me.

"I think sometimes we don't even recognize betrayal as such anymore, since we have internalized it at a young age. If someone invalidates your feelings and keeps you boxed in, it's still a form of betrayal. We have become masters at self-betrayal, so we don't have to deal with the reality...

I've been betrayed by both my narcissist sisters. Its a horrible reality and feeling to live with. I just have to put it out of my mind for self preservation.

A few years back, I thought my mother had betrayed me in a truly heinous way that had catastrophic consequences for me and my children. That event spurred a lot of soul-searching on my part, and I finally realized that no...she didn't "betray" me, she was always toxic and I didn't see it for what it was.

I signed papers on Good Friday, literally, for a very large property transfer. Then I was rendered homeless. You can’t make this stuff up. And my lawyer even abandoned me. Fearing for herself.

Dr. Ramani, I have a different experience. I have been abandoned by the US Army. I served 22 years. I am combat wonded in Iraq 2005. I was a recruiter at the end of my career. After I spent my entire adult life serving, I was seperated by administrative discharge (non judicial) the proccess is the ultimate betrayal as it is absent of due process (key narcist tool). Every promise of retirement and future health issues were stripped. I am suffering from sever depression and anxiety. I have signed up and pray for some answers.

I feel betrayed when the narcissist lies.

I was recently betrayed by an employer. I had been honest with them about my mental illness and neurodiversity struggles, and they said they would absolutely help me adjust as I went. I was upfront with them along the way, and they were awesome.... at the start. Then things got darker, my bosses stopped interacting with me, and then BOOM!! I was fired because I was "not a good fit" because of my disabilities. They said I was a part of the family. I believed them. The firing was an upper case T trauma for me. Thankfully I have a care team to keep me from doing more harm to myself than they did. But yeah..... betrayal can come from anyone, anywhere, anytime.

Betrayal is a word I never even considered on my healing journey! WoW! Thank you very much indeed!

Wishing your Mother a Happy and Healthy Birthday! 🥳🎂

Love you so much Doktor Ramani, you dont know how you saved so much lives out there, you are gorgeous!!💖🧘💫😘 Janne from Germany

Betrayal is like the worst magic trick you never knew you were a part of...

Oh Betrayal… Having an nmom makes it even better I trust no one as a result

Thank you Dr Ramani and Staff . Yes, we have been betrayed in numerous ways... emotionally, financially, physically, mentally, spiritually and even damaging our health and our very Souls. This is major Abuse, a type that for me will never be fully repaired nor healed in my lifetime. The GRIEF is overwhelming at times which is another Injury to the Soul. Thankfully I have always been a Spiritual person and yet, at times it has even destroyed my spiritual devotion and Beliefs. This is Brutal and few in Family Law, Psychology, Medicine, Healthcare, Legal System, etc. recognize any of this. Education is essential. I have graduate degrees in Psychology and never learned this until the Major Discard and Abuse happened to me. The ability to Deceive, Lie and Betray by these damaged creatures is at a Level beyond comprehension by those of us with any Moral Compass. It is truly a grief worse than the Death of a loved one because of the damage intentionally inflicted on another human being who was unaware of the Betrayal. This should be a criminal offense, instead they always Win .

I’m registered and know there’s always something to learn from Dr. Ramani. Hard to give narcissistic issues any more thought but I trust this human so I’ll be there. 💕💜💕💜

She stabbed me in the back several times. I unmasked her, she was telling me she loved me while she said horrible things about me and cheated. I’m past it now but I will say, the detox is unpleasant. To those of you losing hope, just let the time pass. It can feel almost obsessive to worry and overthink. Force yourself to be busy and it’ll be just fine. Do not look for more info it’s over 🎉

They have only cognitive empathy. This means they are fastidious about doing and saying things that indicate they have concern for you. Unlike many grandiose narcissists, a covert narcissist has a cognitive understanding of how people behave when they have concern for others. But when the chips are down in your life, such as you are the victim of a crime, you are very sick, or you lose your job, the covert narcissist is chilly, abandoning, and just “doesn’t get it.” They may blame you for your misfortune. The covert narcissist can’t summon any of the normal ways of caring in these moments. In these ways, they reveal themselves to have no emotional empathy. Depending on how long it takes for you to experience such incidents, you could go for years not realizing that your partner is a narcissist. They may literally turn their back on you, over seemingly trivial matters. This is a trait they share with grandiose narcissists. Maybe they get annoyed that you’re walking too slow and leave you alone while they rush ahead, or they get impatient with what you’re saying and turn around while you’re in mid-sentence, or maybe you’re a little late for a social function that you’re attending as a couple, only to find them already inside as if they weren’t at the event with you. They probably appear charming and competent to those who don’t live with them. A covert narcissist’s constant striving for perfection often results in a set of traits that most of us (who are not obsessed with perfection) admire, as long as we don’t get too close to the narcissist. This makes explaining the upside-down hall of mirrors that is your shared intimate space with the covert narcissist impossible to explain to those outside the relationship, who will assume you are either exaggerating, or that your relationship skills are lacking. The covert narcissist may be a pillar of the community, or has lofty, well thought-out ideals. The striving for perfection of a covert narcissist often results in associating themselves with highly regarded intellectuals, businesspeople, or other such pillars of the community, such that the covert narcissist appears to be a pillar of the community themselves. Additionally, covert narcissists can identify with a vision of societal utopia, and become a zealot about their particular ideals, whether liberal or conservative. The covert narcissist is surprisingly lazy. Despite their lofty ideals or connections, the covert narcissist often does little to no work to actually earn the respect of people in the community through their actions. Their ideals or connections are a facade they choose instead of real effort and commitment. They can be sexually faithful. Unlike grandiose narcissists, who are often sexually unfaithful, covert narcissists can be sexually faithful for fear of their reputation being damaged, or out of sheer laziness or shyness, not out of an emotional commitment to their partner. This can be confusing to the neurotypical partner, who sees the faithfulness as a sign of love, making the erroneous assumption that the covert narcissist has emotional empathy, and therefore the capacity to love. They have a Jekyll and Hyde personality, often raging, or finding fault with you, in private as a way of relieving their own inner shame at not being perfect. This is another trait that coverts share with grandiose narcissists. It feels like you have a partner who’s really a teenager, and that it’s your duty to shoulder the “steadiness” they need in the face of their criticisms and anger. The covert narcissist has absolutely no sense of humor about this behavior, meaning there’s an unnecessary “heaviness” in the relationship that leaves you walking on eggshells. Additionally, That feeling when your partner cheated and you don't have the courage to leave him / her so you just death with the pain and live everyday asking questions about your worth. This pain is different from the cheating one_living and seeing him everywhere anticipating when him or she do it again. The best thing is to hire a private investigator Metaspyhub@gmail. com to help you spy on their cellphone remotely just like he did for me...

The fact that I FELT betrayed is enough of a compass, and I am learning I don't have to justify myself to anyone for feeling that way. Not even to myself. In my family, the insidiousness comes from so many things that are left unsaid, and I am left with guessing and self blame. At some point I just stopped trying to explain HOW I was betrayed. Even to myself. You can just let it go, as an act of self-trust and kindness to yourself.

I was betrayed by the Narcissist's triangulation. My mother even tried to turn my bf against me. The worst betrayal was when she 'set me up', distressing me so much, that I got really dysregulated. She then called the 'men in white coats', I was taken away, hospitalised and ended up being given a label, which still negatively impacts my life today. I finally got away, three years ago when I went NC. This type of betrayal is unconscionable. I could never betray someone in this harmful way. There are smaller betrayals, that we can almost expect in life, but they are always present with a Narcissist.

Hi Dr. Ramani! 🖐️😊💕🕊️✌️ I immediately clicked on your video!

I trusted - I wanted to believe. My father betrayed - he wanted to control. My brother fell in line -he wanted to be "the good one", and the wedge was driven deep.

I need this event sooo very much. Perfect timing. I’ve been betrayed 💔 deeply and am trying to heal from years of narcissistic abuse. Thank you Dr. Ramani ~ I will be listening Saturday. ❤️

Thank you Doc Ramani for this class❤

Everyone I know with one or more narcissistic parents has been affected into adulthood by the experiences they had as children. Narcissistic parents don't teach us to value ourselves because they don't care. I released all the self-blame/shame and realized I stood no chance with what I was up against.

There is only betrayal in such a relationship.

Oh my god, I cannot believe that you as a person or better to say as an angel exist in this life in this world oh my god, I really cannot believe it 💞💞💞💞 thank you so much, all the best things in life for you, you deserve the best of the best, I send all of my good energies to you❤ love and light❤❤

My mother was a borderline and what they do is think others will betray them. My mother literally howled about this. Yet their abuse is betrayal. But they can't see it. Only they are victims.

❤❤If we are breathing we have been betrayed in some form and way! Some betrayal is more hurtful and scars us! 😢😢but we can survive and move through and overcome it! Thanks!

Thank you Ramani and team… work that is changing lives for the better. ‘Tis a lonely place out in the swampland, when one has been duped and betrayed. I can recall that crocodiles/ alligators ( one of them) catch their pray and drag them to the bottom of the water and then keep rolling them over in a torturous ‘death roll’ until the prey dies. Quite apt I feel for the feelings experienced by one who has experienced betrayal . Once you have experience this bone crushing event, there is no where safe to ‘swim’ ….

Registered... see you Saturday Dr. R

Story of my life. .. I say live with cats, (lol?), they are calm, independent, and don’t suffer fools….they will move on.. It’s as good as it can get. Happy Birthday to your Mom. And when is your birthday, Dr. Ramani?

Many Happy Returns of the Day to your Dear Mother💝Dr. Ramani🙏💐🕊🤗May you both celebrate the day together with lots of love and happiness🙏⏳🌐🧭

I cried for three days until it was no tears but just the crying voice.

That is a complex and vast subject. Too bad I will be working during your workshop :(

You have helped me so much♥️🙏

After the hideous fallout with a very exploitative and manipulative female relative ( I was seen as the scapegoat and human cash machine amongst other things), I remember calling out another male relative ( who proved to be very lame, unreliable and mean). He then made very nasty remarks about my mental health, that he does NOT know me or care, for me to then go in and call him out again for being weak, lame and yes..... a traitor! I know it sounds awful but yes I look back and do NOT regret a single thing I said, because sometimes we have to put the antagonistic people in their place - even if they are biologically related! This was 3 years ago, and it still takes me some time to realise how betrayed I was from relatives, and yes this has meant that I have gone full no contact - immediately after I called out this one relative! So far, they haven't been able to get through or reach me, and I've been careful and clear with people who I still talk to NOT to 'update' me about them - while also not revealing a lot about any new developments in my life just in case it gets 'reported back'...... It's bitter, sour and sweet.

For some reason, I attract narcissistic people. After a bad break-up with a narcissistic alcoholic, I am unable to be around these people: They give me serious anxiety. Finally!

Registered and looking forward to attending. Thank you 🙏🙂🕊

Thank you so much! Happy wonderful birthday to your mother!!

Thank you @DoctorRamani !!!!!

Dealing with narcissistic dad and aunt and it's very draining :(

Happy Birthday mom! My mom (rip) and I share a bday and I am the youngest of nine. SO you know I got all the family Ire! We are Irish and Ireland is the land of Ire! I can't blame them, they had it pretty rough. Still no excuse to be horrible to family and friends. Mom was a little enabling to keep peace but didn't like it. People back then had a much harder life than we do today. Mom was a wonderful, happy soul . Too many kids so they blamed her and pop for not giving them all they saw people in North New Jersey had. Envy there was off the charts. We retreated to the countryside to avoid that reality. Thanks for all your help DocRam!!~

Laaaawrd!! Doctor, keep em coming, you are helping so many people (myself included!!)

Thank you Dr. Ramani I have registered and appreciate your work and support. I have been betrayed in familial, friend, ex partners and work relationships. Not feeling my best and will appreciate the understanding and healing that this will provide. I’m struggling to trust again though hope too in the future. Happy Birthday to your Mom 🥳 Huge blessings 🙏🏼

Thank you Dr Ramani. I found your channel in the last couple months. It has been a godsend for my psyche. I came to the realization I was dealing with a narcissist for the last 10 years at work. It wasn't until I attached the concept "covert narcissist" to this person did I finally and truly make sense of what the f* I was dealing with. Just last week, someone whom I thought was a support system for me 'betrayed me', essentially transforming into a flying monkey. I did all the wrong things, trying to save people from the same fate as myself and it has blown up in my face. I am NOW the absolute villain in my workplace and YET I still catch myself reflecting, trying to see where they are coming from and come up with lists of what is wrong with me when I really should just cut loose. I am now steadily (FINALLY) working out my exit strategy. I look forward to your upcoming event this weekend and your book later this month.

Yes he betrayed me and our kids, so did his sister enablaying his affair, I will never forgive them, goes to show you can't trust anybody, people are not always what the seem, what a sad reality it is. Good luck everybody that's going through this ❤

Thank you for this I am right in the middle of a bad crisis. And wishing right now your Mom a very happy birthday. much love and hugs

Happy bday to your mom!

thanks Dr. Ramani

Ahhh Happy Birthday 🌹🌹🌹🎉 to your Mom 🎉 mines is 11th. Thank you Dr. Ramani for all your help ! 💕

I signed up! Can't wait 😊 Thank you for doing this for us Dr. R ❤

Thank you for video, Ive lived an entire life of betrayal and deprived from human experiences caused by psychopathic predatoral abusive opportunists.. sick arseholes and they're not adult or human enough to own Thier mistakes that they put onto others. It's good to see the truth to learn from mistakes seeing how some treat human life is unavoidable

Thank you very much

Thank you 🙏🏾

It's at 5am Australian time😅 3 alarms it is

For those of us in Australia , hope we can get to download the workshop....at 2am our time, not sure I can take a whole lot in!!🙃 Looking forward to it though. Thank you 💜

I only can blame myself for my own bad decisions in my life choices.

Thank you

I think the first step to avoid this problem is to never marry or procreate. This can remove any incentives that might be involved in those situations. This doesn't eliminate the problems, but it makes it more survivable.

I’m constantly being betrayed. It has become my life tbh🤦🏼‍♀️

Much appreciated

I registered. Q- will you please touch on the *betrayal* of "friends" who befriend the NEX's new supply? It hurts.

Yes with my father after the death of my mom. He is so narcissist he just still don't want me to be happy and I left home at 20 I couldn't handle that and I just quite and end contact with him and his second wife. Now I am happy but at dreams I always saw I am betrayed by him and his brothers side too.

I was discarded after 25 years of marriage, I consider that a betrayal

Betrayal is my covert narcissistic mother’s name.

Happy Birthday to your mom, on Feb 10.

Dr Ramani first of all, I feel the need for α big "THANK YOU" for this opportunity you offer us. Ιt is actually, a gift. ❤Regarding the matter, I believe that during our lifetime we ​​have all- more or less- been betrayed by somebody (many of us, have also betrayed somebody). Βut the terrible feeling of injustice one experiences from a narcissist's betrayal, is like no other.

Yes.

Yes because, although I can only speak for myself, I think one of the major questions a person, who’s been betrayed, may have is, “Did I betray them first?” It is a difficult question, not just in the fact that it’s kind of chicken/egg. But, because it causes a person to wonder if they were the original narcissist, that just blithely, indifferently betrayed someone they felt they loved OR if who they consider to be a betraying narcissist, has merely perceived betrayal or is just an original narcissist. I do t expect the question to actually be answered as, it is individual to each situation. But, I’d guess people often have it twirling around, in the back of their mind.

APSATS, betrayal trauma certified therapists

Registered.

I’m so upset that I missed the event! Will you be having more of these? And is there a place I can sign up to receive emails or notifications about upcoming events? You’re so awesome, thank you!

❤

Signed up😀

Wish I didn't have to work sat morning! 😢

Very interested, but it will be at 3:00 a.m. Tokyo time. 🙁

i missed the event!

Hey again 👋🏻

19th, 7 February 2024

My sister is still betraying me. I have blocked her.

Can you talk about betrayal from a legal and government perspective? Because the betrayals are layered these days. Relationships, jobs and managers, trump and republicans, the list goes on and on.

incredible, thanks for all you do for so many - and a very Happy Birthday to your Mom, what a gift she brought into the world 🌟

I signed up for your Betrayal Webinar. I noticed it said Zoom which is something I’m not familiar with . Does this mean all participants will be able to see me and that I’ll have to share my betrayal story? I don’t think I could say it out loud without my vocal cords being permanently cut off from their blood supply or my tears flowing copiously.😔 sorry.

Freinds who devaue you and make you feel like you are a piece of crap.

What time zone is the 6pm please?

What's the time zone of the event?

why doctor ramani you help so much for free the peoples?

Use your common sense and get out .... Be alone 😊😊😊

I was wondering if you could maybe do a video on the differences between an autistic meltdown vs narcissistic rage/tantrums. Coz I’m autistic and my meltdowns happen when I have been suppressing my autistic traits for too long I guess what I’m asking is, is there a difference between them pathologically/psychologically

If a narcissist person goes to counseling can they change the way they act or the way they treat people?

What if we missed the betrayal zoom webinar...is there a replay link? 🌷🙏

Is there a recording of the betrayal webinar?

Ma'am, I don't know if you can answer me today or not, but I'm really like you need to get back in touch with me just for a short answer, would do. I'm a 61 ladyFebruary. The 19th and my mother has sent me a birthday card was $61 in it. My mother is a narcissist who still is still with 🎉abuser. My mother has been so she's betrayed me. That's what I was watching today. Should I call her? Let her know or send her A Thank you note just Let that be it🎉❤