Sorry i was a little bit all over the place in this video, I just hope one person can understand that they are NOT ALONE!! when dealing with anything relating to mental health and Its ok to talk about it Lets make the comment section a welcoming and safe place to just opening up and not pretending everything has to be ok all the time
Depression's a bitch. Terrible mental health sucks. Super glad you're getting better, Ben! We're here for you. To all the others who are also struggling with mental illness, y'all aren't alone. Im struggling too. We shall struggle together. Don’t give up ❤
Ben we are all proud of you. A lot of people (including me) get it. Thinking it's not real, you don't have it, not wanting to talk about it, all that. We're very proud of you for being able to talk about it.
I can relate and i think what you're talking about like seeing yourself from a third perspective can be derealisation, you should maybe do research about it, and also im really happy you're getting better, take your time if you need a break, also thank you so much for your videos actually its crazy how you helped me do much, you're videos like kinda made me enjoy life again, or just distracted me but they made me happy and now im truly better, i hope you have a vreat life and take care of yourself
Hey, I just want to tell you that you're not alone. I've dealt with depression before and I can tell you that you're not alone in that numbness, you described it pretty well from what I've seen how other people share about their depression and from my own experience, not only that, it's really hard to talk about it in general so it's great that you're opening up about it. I'm glad to hear that you're doing better now!
I'm glad you're doing better dude, that's a huge W in the chat! Depression sucks for me as well, but it sucks even more for me because I'm also trying to help one of my friends out with their depression and I feel like I'm just trying to find ways to distract myself from my problems and pretend that I'm alright. The stress is high for me, but I don't wanna be a burden to my family, but I am getting a little bit of help. Anyways, glad that you're better, W in the chat!
Missed you Ben, and I'm glad it got better, it's really good to explain the numbness so it could be understood (despite it being weird) and me and many other will stay here no matter what
we love you ben! you’re super awesome for being able to open up about this stuff. we’ll be supporting you through your highs and lows. Personally I understand this and am also recovering which is kind of a coincidence. Ill look forward to your new videos coming up! sending you much love as always
Honestly mate all power to you for talking about this. Depression really does suck ass but we’re all so so proud of you for trying to get better even if you’re still struggling. You’re doing great and it will all get better sooner or later. Love you mate ❤❤
You're video resonated so much with me and what I'm dealing with. I've been trying to work through things on my own, recognizing my emotional patterns, etc, and at the moment I am working my way up from a period of feeling really low/lonely, and it's so difficult because it's really hard to explain to other people whats going on because I can't even figure it out most of the time myself. So thank you for the video, definitely was what I needed today. Now off to eat spaghetti! Needed to edit this after reading through the comment section, why can't the rest of the internet be like this comment section? Supportive, caring, open, just beautiful. This is what an online community should be.
It's a big step to finally start being open with your feelings and your struggles. In my experience, opening up and finally asking for help for the weight you've been carrying for such a long time is difficult and, a lot of times, not wanted in society. It's a big step that not many people make because of all the stigma and the feeling of not wanting to be a burden affecting you. I'm sure many people including me are very proud of you for being open and trying to be an example for others like yourself in order to help others out of that hole that's so hard to get out of. Thank you for coming out with this and please take as long as you need to recover because anyone dealing with that and defeating that deserves a long and restful break.
Congratulations, ItsBen! I have severe OCD and bipolar disorder, so I definitely understand where you are coming from. I am so glad that you are getting better and taking time for yourself. Remember that, no matter what happens, the world needs you and your vision. We love your videos so much, and we are all excited for your return. Keep on going through life! :)
Man, you are so strong for breaking through the mental struggles of deppression. Hopefully you continue to get better and better as you go on. Keep going, you got this! 🎉
And I just want to add- I had no clue you had depression. However, now that I’m aware, the fact that you cared for us throughout your RU-vid experience, despite the pain you were enduring; the fact you still had (and have still) so much compassion for us means so much to me-and I’m sure many others!! It’s so wonderful to see you beating your depression, and the fact that you’re just a wonderful human being, with so much love for others. Thank you so much, Ben.
idk if this helps you in any way, but i just wanted to let you know that some people i know, myself included, have had this 3rd person experience and/or have felt numbness. You are NOT alone with that! I am proud of you, keep going dude! :)
I literally had a very similar situation to yours but it's been like episodes for me and I'm so glad that everything's getting better to you! I hope it stays that well and only gets better
I’m really glad you’re doing better, to be honest I resonate a lot with some of the things you said in your video. I developed depression when I was pretty young but for a long time I didn’t even really know what depression was, it wasn’t even a conversation people were having yet. When my parents eventually started getting worried because of my grades, I was pretty in denial about it, and I was always of the mentality I wasn’t that bad because I never did anything to physically harm myself. I didn’t have any inciting incident, I just developed depression, but it then got a lot worse when it would affect my social life and in turn that would make me worse. I missed almost a whole year of school at one point of it, my parents thought it was better I was away from my intense school environment because I was only getting worse. I eventually went on anti depressants so a lot of my “worse” feelings went away but the thing with anti depressants is they get rid of the “darker” feelings but also the good ones. So during my formative mid teens when I should’ve been socialising, growing my passions and as a person, I was really apathetic towards it all. I didn’t enjoy anything and even though I didn’t feel nearly as depressed anymore, and when my granddad died I felt really unbothered about it, I didn’t feel like the person I was before I became depressed. I eventually came off the anti depressants when it seemed like I wasn’t in such a pit, but I’d be lying if I wasn’t a bit behind my peers in all aspects because of it. My formative teen years were spent wasting away and being apathetic; now I’m in a much better place from where I was, I’m trying to foster my passions and hobbies, I’ve been working out more, and I’ve been trying to make more of an effort socially. I still have periods of time where I get depressed, it doesn’t go away, but then again I’m still playing catch up for everything I missed out on, and with more things to look forward to and care about I find it a bit easier to get out of my funk. I graduate soon but it still feels like I’ve only just turned 13, I’m hoping I get there at some point where I’m better equipped to deal and depressive periods won’t effect my life as much. Sorry if this comment sounds a bit parasocial, I’ve watered it down a bit because it’s been a really complicated journey and I find it difficult to talk about especially with the new depression culture the internet has. I hope my comment is able to show some support for you and anyone else who’s currently going through or even currently trying to deal with the aftermath of depression. It’s really difficult and it doesn’t really feel like you fully move past it, but eventually you’ll be in a better position from where you were before.
Its ok ben! depressions a bastard, were all super happy your getting better! We’re here for you❤ we’re all so proud of you that you could come and talk to us :)
Also, I completely relate to your past experience. I had a point where I felt exactly like you. I’m blessed enough to have gotten out of it. Anyone reading this should know that what Ben is saying in the video is 100% true. It’s super hard, but seeking help is the best thing you can do.
We’re here for you, Ben!! All the time! I’m gonna say, when you asked, “Does anyone relate to this?” I’m gonna be honest, I totally understand how your depression is going. I’ve been dealing with it for four years now, and I’m just so elated to know that you feel better! And, of course, a pep talk for me has never helped me, lol. I completely understand how you feel, Ben. We’re here for you, yeah? Virtual hug!!!! ❤❤❤❤❤
From someone who has suffered with it most of there life. I completely understand where you’re coming from, depression can be such a pain in the ass, and I’m so proud that you are getting better. It proves that there is a light at the end of this horrible tunnel, and even if you have days where you still feel like shit, at least you know it’s not a constant battle. The fact that you’re getting better proves to a lot of adults and young adults (such as myself) that you can push through it, and that you can make a difference. Once again I’m so so proud of you and I’m glad you’re taking time to just help yourself out. (Ps you don’t sound crazy, I deal with the exact same thing.)
Depression is such a terrible thing I know what it feels like to not ever feel like things were ever going to get better I thought what I felt 2 years ago was my own personal hell and I was never going to get out of it and here I am starting this March almost a whole sh free for a year I never thought in my entire life I’d get this far it’s truly such an amazing thing to experience. Ben don’t ever think you are alone there’s always someone out here who’s going to feel or have been in an almost similar situation, we love you
I’ve felt the same way, I’m not sure what made me better but sometimes it kinda goes away. Some get lucky and some don’t, the ones who don’t need to speak to other people (that’s what I done and it really does help!!)
Congratulations on beating your depression you are pretty strong The question is are you ready to challenge goku? he also knows yiu are pretty strong (Jokes aside seriously congratulations hopefully your life only gets better wnd better from now on)
Tbh, when you said you feel like you're viewing things in 3rd person, I've been feeling like that as well lately. Idk when it started happening but it's mostly been at school that it happens. Idek why. I understand everything you said in the video and I'm going through it right now as well. Also, thank you. I think I needed to hear that.
I’ve waited forever for this! i luv you Ben, i can’t explain how happy i am to see when you post. i’ve been watching you for 4 years! Im diagnosed with depression and seeing things like you and other people in my life get better it puts hope out for me too! I’m so DUCKING proud to see you better! Don’t give up on us just yet 💗
Ben wanted to say you are not alone :) I relate to a lot of what you talked about especially not feeling real, that's something I have struggled with for years and still do tho I don't understand fully what's going on with me I want you to know you are not alone :) I wish you the best ^^ Also I'm proud of you for talking about it 😎
Depression is a bitch. 2.5 years and a bunch of attempts and I'm finally starting meds within the month. What you described sounds a lot like disassociation. It's a bitch too. You're not alone in what you feel. Glad you're doing better. Just remember, healing isn't linear
Good on you, Ben. I'm so glad you could overcome this terrible situation. To you and everyone else dealing with depression, anxiety, and whatever else that may limit you from being who you want to be, you CAN overcome it. I believe in all of you
I’ve also been dealing with depression for the last year and I’m healing from that and two addictions I got along the way of my decrease in motivation. This motivated me to try and do better for myself. When you were describing how you felt I knew that feeling all too well of seeing myself through like a third person view and wanting to do anything to not feel just empty and to feel like I have a purpose. I got as cynical as it could get and I couldn’t bring myself to feel sad about any horrific news in my life including deaths of people close to me, which I’m still trying to beat. It really does sound weird to someone who hasn’t experienced it before. You’re awesome Ben, getting better from depression is actually such a massive under appreciated achievement because that apathy you talked about can stop so many people from trying to improve themselves.
Seriously good job man, so glad you’re feeling better. I know a lot of people with a ton of problems and while I can’t really can’t ever give advice I just listen to them. So glad you’re feeling better. Keep winning
The ‘eating table’ part is one of the most inspiring things I’ve heard in this video, along with the talk about mental health. We’re all dealing with it, and that’s ok because tomorrow’s a new day. Anything can happen and the better will come soon, I’m also healing from my depression and it’s just amazing how much I’ve done to make it this far. Have a great day!
I'm so proud of you dude! Watched you in like 2022 and was wondering where you went when I checked on your channel last week, depression is honestly so shitty especially when it's been going on for so long that it becomes clinical. I'm honestly glad you could get out of the derealization state and things are getting better. If you don't know, derealization is a state of mind where you have a constant feel of things being a dream or being not real, sometimes time for seconds seeming too fast or too slow for some odd reason. But seriously, please try to keep going on with the path of getting better. I have faith in you
I'm glad that you're doing better Ben ! And for everyone that is still struggling in everyday's life with depression : everything will get better somehow, be strong and be kind to yourself
I am suffering from very similar from what you did, 7 years of my life has been honestly dropping down to a worse and worse level of it and I know I'm this depressed because I don't have a shoulder to cry on, I don't have a friend or family member to call, I am alone living in a shitty shelter at age 19 and it's just people don't really care about you when your struggling, people see you as a liability and that's what everyone sees when they see me. I would say I'm on the same level as a suicide level but I wouldn't ever do that I think suicide is a waste of life but that doesn't mean I can just feel terrible for hours on end all because I had a terrible start to my life. What could help me is love from people, support from the community, a shoulder to cry on, a person I can hug who also isn't paid to I hate therapy and like I'm depressed because I've never belonged anywhere and even when I did something would go bad and I would end up alone again. I am still very depressed and it is getting worse but I think some day it will get better and I'll be happier or in better words more positive. God job Ben getting through most of that depression, you did something I can't even began doing and that's all. "Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem" R.W
this is such a nice message from someone who gets it! I'm so sorry you don't have a true friend to share the burden with :( I hope channels like this and all your favourite safe spaces online can serve to fill that void even a little, because it must be hard. for what it's worth, I'm proud of you for being able to pull through and battle every day to live. you're truly strong! and I'm here if you need it ❤
It totally sucks how you don't feel like you'll ever get through the depression, and how it feels like you've made no progress. The reality is that if you're recognizing it and getting help, you're making progress. You'll still feel terrible, but eventually it'll get better. Sometimes it takes a really long time, and that's the hardest part because it doesn't feel like things are going to get better ever because you can't see the future. I haven't been going through it for nearly as long as you have, but I do understand how you've been feeling. Yes, my experience is different and will always be, but I do understand a lot of the experience too. Sometimes that's all that you need in the moment is just someone to say they understand. I'm glad you and so many others are still here fighting a good fight. In the end, you're all worth it and it doesn't matter what that voice in your head says, or what anybody else might say.
Hey, Ben! I just wanted to let you know how proud I am of you for winning the battle against your depression and anxiety. I know it wasn't easy, and you showed a lot of strength and resilience in overcoming those obstacles. I hope you realize how much of an inspiration you are to others who may be going through similar struggles. You are not alone, and we are all here for you whenever you need a listening ear or a supportive shoulder to lean on. Keep up the amazing work, and never forget that you are loved and valued! Love from Germany and from many others around the world who enjoy your content❤
It is so inspiring to hear you cpme out and speak about yourself. Mental health should bever be ignored. It will never go away, but it will get better. We missed and we are happy to see you again. I hope you have luck in your future endeavors.
You are definitely not alone in feeling miserable and numb to everything around you, Ben! In fact, there are most likely people in this very community who relate to your exact struggles! I’m just glad to hear that you’re finally feeling healthy enough to deal with it and talk about it with us! Stay strong, king! ✊💖💖💕💕💕
we’re all so proud of you! ive always struggled with hurting myself and anxiety. but i promise it will always gets better. im 3 months clean and im learning to ground myself when my anxiety gets bad! i dont understand depression that well but i do get want to just feel something(the sh), but im so very proud and happy youre back on your feet and getting better and healthier! we love you ben!!❤😊
hey, i know its a bit late but i just wanted to tell you, you are not alone, you have us. im pretty sure there are a lot of people that understand and support you. im also going through depression and that video accualy helped me feel more confident about trying to heal myself..take care
I'm also struggling with mental health and I'm currently working on gaining motivation to make videos again because of my lack of a genuine audience and countless experiences of bullying. I'm proud of you for being able to talk about it.
I understand what it's like. It may sound crazy to others, but those that have experienced it understand immediately. You're doing great, in your own way. Trying to heal is very scary and not everyone is brave enough to do it; there will be ups and downs, but I'm sure you're going to keep holding on and getting better, one less cloud at a time. Good times will come, you just have to fight for them. And we'll always be waiting here for you, for however long it takes, until this is something YOU'RE ready for. Keep fighting there king 👑
I used to have depression too, and it sucked ass. It lasted about 3 years, but yours lasting 6 years sucks. I'm sorry that happened but I'm glad it got better. I hope things stay good for you.
Ben - i was just recently thinking about you and remember that you have mentioned depression in an earlier video. I have never gone through that struggle myself but I do have someone very close to me, battling a similar fight. I am really happy to hear that life is kinder to you and that you seem to have found a way that works for you. Looking forward to your future content and I wish both you and everyone else with struggle in life, the very best.
So as someone with HIGH empathy I understand how you feel and I’ve related to that before also I feel like the high empathy is like a trait of my autism and like in a way I can like kinda feel how others feel and tell what they feel from like facial expressions and like body language yeah and I too struggle with loneliness and also autism/adhd/depression but i think of all of that as a part of me and I embrace it maybe it’d help if you embraced those parts of you too
This is actually really relatable, especially the 3rd person thing. Like, everything said about the 3rd person stuff is very accurate to me. (The first bit of this is a vent.) As someone who has some pretty bad maladaptive daydreaming for about 5ish years now, it's like I locked myself out of my own brain to protect myself and now I can't find a way out. Like, there literally isn't an hour that im not out of it in another world, which I mean hey it's keeping me from spiraling but still it's something I really want to get out of. Sometimes it genuinely feels like I'm stuck in a dream-like state, and it's a bit scary to feel. I always go through the day avoiding everyone, given it's never-ending stress. And if someone confronts me, like about how I'm becoming a sinner or how being trans is not real, I just say okay on auto-pilot to get out of the conversation asap, or in general I just auto-pilot respond so people don't confront me about anything, because frankly most everyone in my life is transphobic/homophobic. And in general I always feel a burdening tiredness, whether I get 12+hrs or 6hrs of sleep. I guess my main issue is holding on to anger, feeling what I got wasn't fair, just feeling livid at the people who've harmed me. And it definitely isn't fair what happened to me i know that for a fact, but I definitely need to work on myself so i can just let go and move on, so i can grow. (More positive stuff now.) Honestly I'm still in a bad environment I can't get out of, and really struggling, but I've recently become a legal adult so now I can atleast work to become my own person now. Cut my hair, be unapologetically me without worry of punishment, look for ways to become independent, save up for a therapist, and I'm even getting back into my passions (although my brain is still stuck in never-ending exhaustion and procrastination, IM ALSO GONNA WORK TO FIX THAT TOO >:3) So tldr, it gets better. Even if you take baby-steps, as long as you try towards bettering your situation, it can and will get better. Maybe try looking up small guides or watch yt vids to help you learn methods to help your situation. But also, reach out for help. I understand that in some environments nobody is there to support you, and that sucks being the only one to support yourself mentally, but you have the internet if your reading this, so reach out to internet communities for support. Nobody is alone, there's always gonna be someone in the world who would support you. To you who's reading this, I give you a virtual hug, and also some digital snacks. You are strong for making it this far, and SHUSH, I don't care if what you went through "wasn't that bad" or "childish" (which first off all hurt is valid hurt, all trauma is valid trauma, all sadness is valid sadness. You deserve to find help, nomatter how little or big your problems are.), you are so strong for making it this far. And I, along with many other virtual strangers, are rooting for ya. You are amazing, and you're doing great, even just by breathing this lovely hour. And you are not alone. Sparkle on internet stranger uwu
