Infertility, emetophobia, flying solo, and my brand 

Oh Alex... I know "I'm sorry" barely covers it, but please know you and Dan are being prayed for so much. Thank you so much for letting us in on what you've been going through. ❤

I’m currently going through my 3rd miscarriage in the past year and I have a 1.5 year old. Hearing everyone say “everything happens for a reason” and “at least you have one kid” is so much more hurtful than they know. We’re finally seeking medical help to hopefully get answers. Thank you for talking about this.

as someone who also has struggled with emetophobia since childhood, I can truly empathize with how debilitating it is & it really does control your whole life. it goes hand in hand with my personal anxiety & no one understands unless they have emetophobia. I see you ❤️

I hate when people say “just relax”. We conceived our son after half a year and we were the most stressed out in our entire life. We had so much going on. I’m giving you baby dust! Your rainbow will come and sending you love!❤

When I was in college I learned in a womens health class that 99% of women diagnosed as “infertile” (1 year of trying without success) eventually do conceive. Giving you all the baby dust!❤️

I’ve held off on talking abt infertility bc I know people will say like “just adopt.” I’m proud of ya for speaking on it! also I love what you said about other people’s perception of you being their reality, not yours, and just focusing on your reality instead of how others may see you

I have a 2.5 year old, very close in age to Arkham! And we started trying a month after his 2nd birthday - with no luck for a little over a year. Secondary infertility is so much more common than people think, because it's not talked about, probably for all the reasons you mentioned. We had an appointment at a fertility clinic in November, but found out I was pregnant (shocked!) in late October. I'm now 14 weeks with baby number 2! You will get there too, mama! Thinking and praying for you in the meantime ❤

Thank you for being so raw and honest. Its takes a lot of strength to be vulnerable and share your life, especially online and I appreciate you sharing the reality of what it takes to have a family. As someone in her early 20s, I have a few more years until I truly am thinking about starting a family, but I always appreciate any of your conversations (whether its here or on your podcast) where you're being real. However, I do want to say you never owe us anything, so I appreciate you reflecting and deciding that you will be posting whatever you want whenever and wherever. I think in this day and age we feel the tendency to be sharing everything online and keep up with everyone when in reality, like you said you will be doing as you please. Love your content, I really look forward to whats to come for you and sending you lots of love and luck!

The emetophobia is so real Alex. I’ve never felt so validated in my life. Since I was a child I’ve been like this. One time recently I was at a party and a girl beside me threw up and I lunged myself over a bunch of people to escape the situation and completely blacked out. I don’t even remember what happened because my flight mode as so intense. I don’t know how to fix it and it’s taken over my life completely for so many years….

I struggle with emetophobia as well. Debilitating is the perfect word, everything I do revolves around it. It’s such a relief to know other people struggle with that! Sending baby dust and positivity to you Alex!! ✨✨💛💛

I had a hunch you were going through this. I have a son 2 months younger than Arkie and started ttc around the same time as you (I had a hunch you were also ttc from some of your posts). We also wound up being diagnosed with secondary unexplained infertility after a year. We just did IVF and thankfully I’m now 6 weeks pregnant after our first transfer! Hoping it happens for you and Dan soon ❤

I have emetophobia too!!!! I have been watching your videos for years now and learning this really helps me! I want to be a mom one day too but I am terrified of being pregnant with this phobia so to know that you’re doing it is really encouraging to me. Thank you for being so vulnerable, your feelings are so valid🤍

Hi Alex 💕 I also struggle with infertility and it is so hard. It feels so lonely when experiencing something like this. Especially when all your friends are getting pregnant. Of course I’m so excited for everyone and wouldn’t wish infertility on anyone!! But it just feels like I’m going through this alone a lot of the time. So I really appreciate you and Jaci sharing your stories. It helps more than I can express. thank you!! Sending love, positivity and baby dust ✨

i’ve had emetophobia my entire life and it’s literally controlled my life since i was little and has made my life a living hell and it’s so nice to hear you talk about this and remind me i’m not alone and so many others struggle with this so seriously thank you for opening up about that (also i’ve done exposures for a couple years now and it can be a mix of helpful and incredibly hard but i did see progress with it!)

Took me and my husband 5/6 years to get pregnant with our first, 23 weeks pregnant now, wanted to give up so many times but just kept trying and decided to keep trying without putting pressure or expectations on ourselves - which was hard but with a lot of years of patience it was worth it 💕

Thank you for sharing Alex🫶🏻 I would totally recommend exposure theraphy for anything anxiety related! To sit with the feeling and not let it control you is hard work, but so worth it in the end. So sorry to hear about your struggles with infertility, my heart goes out to you. I’m cheering for you!👏🏼❤️

Alex, i hope you conquer your fears this year! It would be great if you vloged your solo trip and shared your experience as it happens!✈

Unexplained infertility after having a child. I can't help but think what changed? What did so many people semi-blindly accept to take within the last 2 years? Something about it messing with women's period and heart inflammation I recall..

Fertility is so interacting. My sister had a miscarriage and then tried for almost two years before finally getting pregnant. Then when they were almost ready to start trying again she went off birth control early on thinking it would take a while and she got pregnant that month!

As someone who works with clients that have emetophobia and does exposure based therapy - please know it can get worse before it gets better!! One of the reasons it can feel worse because you have to retrain your brain through a process called inhibitory learning - and that takes time, and it can feel uncomfortable, overwhelming, and even exhausting. Always be kind to yourself if you are thinking about starting the treatment, doing the treatment or needing a break from the treatment. Take it one step at a time and know you got this ✨🙂

Wishing you the best Alex thanks for opening up!!! Also very random, but your skin is glowing and your red hair fits your skintone so well girl ! 2023 positivity let’s gooo

Thank you so much for being vulnerable. I have emetophobia too and a son Arkies age too. I feel like a terrible mother because during flu season we just stay home it’s so hard for me to go out in public and have him play with other kids because every time he has a play date he ends up sick and I’m so terrified of puking.

I related to everything you said about emetophobia, especially with kids & flying. It's so hard that no one understands. I also want this to be the year that I get help🙏🥺 Thank you for sharing about this!

I send you a huge hug Alex and I want to tell you that everything you said is true and we should try to be more and more positive .. Good things come with time. And I wish you to realize your dream of having another baby! ❤️❤️🥺🥺

Thank you so much for talking about your infertility and what you’ve been going through!! As someone who also suffers and has had MC’s, it’s something that helps/connects so many women since it’s so common and unfortunate we have to struggle when we all deserve to be parents ❤

Wishing you and Dan aaaallll the best for Baby no 2! Your words of encouragement at the end made me tear up 🥺 ttc now for 1.5 years. The first year being just "let's see what happens", was then diagnosed with a hormonal issue and been in treatment now consistently for 6months. It's really hard not to "stress" and get upset. I know it will happen eventually, but it's just really hard. Plus, it's a topic you don't really discuss with people and keep to yourself, which in turn makes you feel isolated....what I'm trying to say is: I'm so thankful for you and others online talk about this! ❤️

I am dealing with the exact same thing and thank you for sharing your story it helps me a ton!! I hate that someone else has to go through this but it is also nice knowing you are not alone. Prayers for a baby for you soon!

People don't understand emetophobia and this made me feel so seen. Thank you Alex

From a fellow infertility warrior to another my heart and thoughts are with you ♥️. It’s such an isolating experience and so comforting to hear someone else going through it. I’m on the other side of it now but it’s still truly the hardest thing I’ve ever been through. The fact you remain hopeful is the best thing you can do, I never lost hope either no matter how hard it got!

I’m going through ERP for emetophobia and it helped me so much.. 😭 I can’t even explain how much it changed my life. Emetophobia wrecked me for years, it was debilitating and it stole me of everything. Now I’m 80% recovered because of erp (exposure therapy) and I can’t even believe I’m finally able to say that!!!

You're so brave for sharing such personal issues, sending you SO many positive vibes! 🩶

People can be so tactless when it comes to this stuff. Especially the ones who are like "you should be grateful you already have one" because they will also be the first to say "oh but you need to give him a sibling" if you decided to only stick with one child. People suck. Thank you for sharing such vulnerable details of your life - you don't owe us anything at all.

I struggled for ages to conceive my first son. Believe me I did everything and the unsolicited comments drove me I sane. Worst couple of years of my life. I have my 5mth old baby now and fear trying again. Sending love to you ❤️

Hi Alex! Secondary infertility warrior here too🙋‍♀️we will get our 2nd babies, I’m sure of it! Thanks for the reminder to stay positive and optimistic as it’s easy to get myself down during this journey😊

If you're comfortable, can you go into why you're against adopting?

Yes queen, thank you for taking about this! It is such an important topic and affects so many, and yes your feelings ARE VALID and you deserve to talk about it as YOU want to. Sending you all the baby sprinkles and so so much strength!

Thank you for sharing with us!! I got pregnant after 4 months of trying and I remember how sad I was to get a negative test and that was only a few months! I can't imagine how difficult this has been for you. I also can't emphasize enough how proud you should be for taking care of your mental health. Plus going through all this while working and being a mom must have been exhausting. Wishing you the most amazing 2023!!!! 💕

Last year was NOT my year either. 2 miscarriages. Our second pregnancy was twins 😞 its tough. God bless and prayers to you and Dan! This is a difficult journey! I hope this has made you & Dan's relationship that much more stronger!! Lots of love to you!

I love the support in this comment section. I completely agree that you can’t compare experiences. I had 6 miscarriages before my daughter. We were told the same, unexplained. Also had no issues getting pregnant just keeping it. We had a heartbeat before too that stopped, and held that baby. It was horrible. But the only thing that kept me going was keeping hope. Believing that doctors saying it couldn’t happen without IVF were wrong. And I was right. My daughter is perfectly healthy and I had a great pregnancy. On the other end. My best friend at the time couldn’t even get pregnant for years. She told me at least you know you can get pregnant. But I felt like I wish I didn’t if it wasn’t the right time. Like why experience the loss and pain without getting a healthy baby out of it. We both had our own experiences but in all it’s hard NO MATTER WHAT. You can’t compare. It can happy against all odds! Sending you all the love ❤

Emetophobia is no joke!! Last August I was waiting in line outside on one of the hottest days of the summer, and someone threw up next to me from heat stroke and I was so afraid that I FAINTED. Now, my emetophobia scares me even more because I no longer have control over my own consciousness

Sending all the baby dust and positive vibes your way! I can only imagine how hard that must be and I feel like all of us know someone struggling with infertility. All your feelings are completely valid and I truly hope you will get your baby soon!

I’m gonna recommend a youtuber, maybe you know her, her name is Taylor R. She helped me not feel alone in my infertility journey. I tried for my first for over a year, got pregnant, lost it, got pregnant again immediately after, almost lost it too, and now I’m 10 weeks and terrified that something terrible is going to happen. Trying to be positive and not to think too far ahead. Good luck to us!

Don't have any kids, but struggling with infertility as well. I have been trying for a year now and just turned 35 and I am worried that I'm just too old. On top of that I have a HORRID mother-in-law constantly pressuring me to "give her a grandchild" specifically a girl because we already have 2 nephews. Oh and my mother-in-law has a tattoo of our 2 nephews constillations so "if the baby can be any month but April that would be great" so her tattoo can "look pretty". Clearly a toxic woman. Just had to get that off my chest. Thank you for bringing this topic of discussion up during a time that I needed it❤️

this is so vulnerable & it means so much that you can open up to us about such a personal topic 🤎 you are so resilient and brave! good for you for staying positive and bringing all the good vibes. that’s the only way to go through it! but don’t forget it’s okay to not be “okay” 🤎 love watching yours and dans life on here!

I think you are so brave for talking about what you have gone through lately! I think you have such a good mindset about this new year and I am trying to think the same way. Just do our best to push negativity away. Also I think you do such great being a mom and I think Arkham loves you so much. I am sending you lots of baby dust and positivity 💛

I know I commented before, but EMDR EMDR EMDR!! Changed my life with emetophobia. I really struggle with it but it has helped me so much. I’m doing a lot better!

Firstly, thank you for sharing your story. You are so brave for talking about something that needs to be publicly discussed more. Secondly, as someone going through similar struggles (3 miscarriages in 12 months) your video has really helped me to not feel so alone and has inspired me to move into 2023 as positively as you are. You should be so proud of yourself for all the people who you are helping and Inspiring by being open with your story! Much love to you and your beautiful family 😍

I’m sending you so much love, good vibes, and positivity for this year Alex! You are such a bright light in our lives and deserve nothing but the best.

I love you because you are so honest and real. I want to give you a big hug! You are a wonderful person and I am so happy you shared with us- I am here cheering you on! This is the year and I’m sending all that baby dust and support ♥️

I understand your feelings so much. Past year was the hardest for me. The hardest ever I think and I’m struggling with mental health illness so hard. But your video helped me a lot. I want to focus on positive side this 2023 year and I’m sure I will get my biggest dream for years and get a corgi puppy this year and this makes me feeling better and I’m focus to stay positive and spread positive energy in universe no matter what because it works ❤ thank you, Alex for being inspiration for me for years. Love you so much!! ❤

alex you are so well spoken, it inspires me. you are so good at getting your point across. I’m sorry for what you’re going through thank you for sharing with us 🤍

Thank you for being so open. We have been going through fertility treatments for over 5 years. I have PCOS. I had a miscarriage in September 2019 February 2020, had my daughter May 2021, and just suffered another miscarriage two weeks before Christmas. The fertility journey is tough.

Thank you for being so vulnerable. It's so helpful in any area of life, you give me courage ❤️

Thank you so much for sharing your journey Alex. I’m going through infertility for the first time myself and have gone through 3 IVF cycles now with no luck (1 ectopic, 1 negative and 1 chemical) so I know how difficult it can be and it’s a very personal journey. But I know I’ll have my rainbow baby one day too! Have faith that it’ll all work out when the time is right 💕

My worst fear is to be sick on a plane and someone throws up. So I can't sit next to random ppl. I also get scared someone will throw up from behind me.

I have an insane phobia of needles that controls so many aspects of my life. Ironically my partner and I are trying to have a baby, and well… that involves NEEDLES and getting blood work. I honestly think the exposure has helped me a lot, with some grounding tools and techniques. I think if you can find a way to expose yourself, with the help of your therapist you can DO IT! You GOT THIS!

It's wild because secondary infertility seems to be so common these days. We only have one child (by choice), but I have a friend who got pregnant so easy as well with her first, but never could have a second. They didn't do any medical interventions tho and left it at one, so hang in there girl - all the baby dust being sent your way.

Oh Alex, my heart hurts for you both. I had an ectopic pregnancy during the summer, and my boyfriends family literally said to me it wasn’t meant to happen yet and to enjoy being young first and that my boyfriends son is my trial run first😞 of course it is a blessing to have a bio child or step child but it still hurts so bad having no control over your body and not knowing why this happened to you… and then I was convinced to get the depo shot by my doctor without knowing it could be a year or not at all before my body could ovulate again. Anyways, lots of love to you and your family. I hope you start to feel more positive, I need to do the same after 2022 💗

I have a 4 year old from IVF and am currently trying to get pregnant again with my frozen embryos. Two early miscarriages last year and currently doing my 4th round of FET... It's exhausting. I am SO grateful to have a child already, but I had an idea for how my family would look, and having to question if that's possible is really upsetting.

sending so much love to you guys 💕 thank you for opening up and sharing this personal part of your life with us. your conversations are going to help so many. xo

Wow I also have emetophobia! I resonate with everything you said. EMDR therapy has helped immensely! Exposure therapy can be traumatizing!

Omg I have emetophobia too it’s literally the worst it really does affect ur day to day life😭😭 I feel like people don’t really understand it either. If you find out how to get rid of it pls lmk😭❤️

I dealt with infertility my first pregnancy due to PCOS. You're not alone!

Alex this brought me to tears! You are such a beautiful person inside and out. Proud of you for speaking about your experiences. wishing 2023 brings you lots of happiness! Things will get better XOXO

I’ve followed you for a long time and also am going through secondary infertility now. It is such a hard thing to go through. Thank you so much for talking about this Alex!! This resonated with me so much and it’s so true that hearing others experiences is so helpful. ❤️ Hoping this year brings us both what we’re hoping for 🥰

Used to struggle really bad with emetophobia and I still have some bad days, but I wanted to share that the book The Emetophobia Manual by Ken Goodman helped me a ton. It's a combo of CBT and has some really good exposure therapy tools. It really has made a difference and I was very reluctant to read it and do the exercises. Don't worry, none are too extreme! You can do it!

Alex I’m so sorry your goin through this.. I’m currently goin through infertility. On month 5 of infertility pills and have done one IUI and no luck.. infertility is a whole other level that is so personal and it effects us mentally and emotionally! Praying for you 🤍

Thank you for sharing everything that you did in this video, it was extremely refreshing. I have emetophobia and it has become such a huge problem in my life, even watching this video I feel nauseous from anxiety because I am going out shopping alone, and that makes me even more anxious because I am scared of being nauseous! Like you explained, it's a vicious cycle. It really helps me and validates me to know that I am not the only one! I hope that going to therapy will help you with your emetophobia this year, you have inspired me to do the same! :)

So proud of you talking about it openly. Infertility sucks and I'vebeen going through it too for the last 2 years almost. Sending you all the best and lots of baby dust **.

Hi Alex ❤️ hearing you talk about your phobia really resonates with me because I also have a phobia...of wasps! It controls my summers and I live in Canada too and you know how short lived our summers are. It completely controls me to the point where the last 2 years especially I just don't go outside in August and September because that is wasp time. I feel you girl, hang in there you're strong and I hope therapy helps you! 🤗❤️ sending lots and lots of love from Toronto!

Girl, I have only flown once in my life, and I just had my second flight and IT WAS BY MYSELF. I did it! and it was only my second time flying!

Just want to thank you for sharing. Not only is this so educational for all young women to hear about and start conversations but so brave of you to share!

Infertility sucks arse. I have primary infertility which just had been the worse thing I've gone through, six years of trying and all types of fertility treatment and losing my two babies me and my husband decided to stop trying. It was too painful and I couldn't handle more pain and potential of losing more babies on the journey to my first child earthside. People that preech they have the answer to infertility suck arse. Its impossible to explain to them the impact it has on every aspect of your life. Sending you so much love and hope for 2023.

I use the symptothermal method for tracking my cycle. It’s wonderful to use as a means of contraception as well as conscious conception. Daysy is also an incredible device from Germany that you use to take your temperature every morning and it gives you your fertility status with light indicators. You can also connect it to an app on your phone to see what’s going on with your chart for more data (hormone imbalance, anovulatory cycles, low progesterone, PCOS etc)

I have emetophobia and two young kids and it literally has taken over my whole life

I feel what you‘er going through, people who don‘t/didn‘t have this issue can not Imagine how it must feel. We hope for our Baby in 2023 too ❤

Loved this video Alex, wishing you all the best this year 💕

You are so strong Alex! I know it will happen when it is the right time for you and your family. It really all happens for a reason (I know it is clise to say but true) Thank you for sharing, and being open about something so close to your heart. You are beautiful inside & out 🥰

Alex, all my love and support goes to you ❤️ my heart aches for what you’ve been going through this year. I’m wishing you the best year ever, please know you are heard and understood and I am so grateful that you allowed us in. You don’t owe us anything but thank you for opening up to us and also for speaking up on such a sensitive topic that is important to so many women out there ❤️

Oh Alex! I can't even tell you how sorry I am for you. I've heard all those sentences before, too. I've got endometriosis and adenomyosis and the chance of me getting pregnant is not that high even tho I've been pregnant before, but Ive had a MC. And people are always trying to tell me how "this just isnt supposed to happen to you" ... It is your Body and your life. You are allowed to feel all those feelings! I'll light up a candle for you guys. I am absolutely sure that you will welcome your 2nd wonder soon ❤️

Hey Alex thank you for sharing I send so much positivity and light your way 🤍🌈 I also suffer with emetophobia it’s made me more cautious to have children someday but I am certain it can be managed and we can enjoy life without the burden of it! Sending love xx

All the best for you and your family! Thank you for being honest about this topic. It shouldn't be a unspoken topic.

You will get everything you’re hoping for! Everything will happen in time 😊 side note, mentioning surgeries etc. the best thing I ever did was get a breast reduction. I haven’t had kids yet but decided to do it instead of waiting to love myself until after!

You are so strong Alex and an example for so many women ♥️ thinking of you and sending you positive vibes!

I’m sorry for what you’ve been going through! I’m so proud you opened up about your journey through infertility. Just know that I’m praying for you and your family! Thank you for sharing, it could help so many people find encouragement❤️❤️ Also, I’m so excited to see what your brand is about!!!!

Alex and Dan I´m so sorry to hear this news, I send you all my love and support from Spain and I do really really hope for you to get that positive test, as always thanks for sharing such important topics with us, you´re an angel from heaven

People invalidating a person’s own testimony/struggle is literally so insensitive. Sending you love and baby manifestations to you Alex!

Thanks for sharing. It’s so refreshing to hear someone that understands how it feels, nothing worse than those comments “just relax”

I am sending you positive energy and hoping and praying for you to have the good news you want 🙏

It's not anyone's place to tell you how many kids you should have or "one is enough" ..... i have a feeling that you will be someday just be patient 🤍🤍.. and never worry about the age difference your kids will be close no matter what ... i have different age gaps with my siblings.. one of them is five years a part and we are still close and can talk about so many things ... praying for you 💗💗🫂

Almost a year of trying after a miscarriage last year for me, it really does mentally hurt so I had to stop trying and just live my life for now. I thought because I got an unplanned pregnancy that I would fall pregnant fast. When I lost that baby I tried right after for a baby. I have a child as well who is almost three. I wanted them closer in age and she would do so well with a sibling. It’s heartbreaking and devastating and all the things. I am thinking about you too while you go through this as well. ❤️

Alex you are the best mom and I look up to you!! You are such a fabulous role model for me. Thanks for sharing your story - your vulnerability helps so many ❤

You look gorgeous !!! Thank you for your support on Instagram when I messaged you

We're trying for a baby with my husband about 9 month. Its so difficult not stressed about it... We went some doctors, everything seems okey... They say , wait until 1 year of trying and than we go another medical examination... Its hard, but I know we are going to be parents :) I send positive vibes to you!

I hug you and send lots of love! I'm struggling with the same situation and I totally understand you! Wish all our dreams come true soon♥

I think this is my new favourite video of yours ❤ I felt so much emotion from watching it for many reasons. Since you said it to us, I want to say it to you - I’m so proud of you and you’re doing so well on this journey, you deserve everything you want in 2023 and I’m sending all the baby dust and positive vibes to you. Stay strong mumma xx

Thank you so much for sharing❤ my husband and I are currently TTC for our first. Just got over my first period since trying and I was heartbroken. You are not alone and I cannot even imagine what it must be like. We’re all here for you, Alex❤

Thank you for sharing your experience. It’s the hardest things to do but the most helpful to someone else. I am sure your dream will come true this year. It’s just a va matter of time. Stay strong.

I completely understand trying and then getting excited each month, just to have your period come. Currently going through my first Ivf treatment and have my transfer on Tuesday ❤️

Hi Alex! I have emetophobia and am currently pregnant with my first baby. So terrified to deal with the anxieties that surround that. As far as flying here are some tips! Sit in the window seat (less risk of being thrown up on), wear an eye mask, noise canceling headphones, and take Dramamine (edibles too if your body reacts positively to that). I stay in my little blackout bubble until I land.