I'm a psychotherapist, and watching Dick Schwartz do IFS is seriously one of my favorite things. I've binge watched his courses like psychological netflix because I couldn't get enough. IFS is such captivating and powerful work. Thank you, Aubrey, for your vulnerability. This was an incredibly powerful session. You have so much access to your self energy, and the way you described everything, including the pouring in of the light and the gravity of self, was so powerful. So many clients describe self as light. I could see and feel the gravity and critical mass of self in you. Powerful visuals. You are clearly a journeyor and seer. Great session👏👏👏
As someone who does a lot of therapeutic healing work with people, including with psychedelics, what I've seen is that IFS can really help some people, BUT, it can also really, really fragment people and get them so lost in seeing parts that they lose their sense of spiritual center / wholeness. You HAVE TO be able to maintain that sense of wholeness and connection for IFS to really be useful. BE CAREFUL WITH THIS, FOLKS! Much love!!!
I’ve seen the same. It’s really important for people who are highly fragmented with parts in extreme roles to understand that we are cultivating The Self to unburden the parts, not locking the state of fragmentation into permanent through becoming aware of them. When the client doesn’t have a strong sense of Self, that can be a very foreign concept. There seems to be a point in working with them where bringing their attention to the fact that you, the practitioner, are lending your Self to them as an example for what they’re aiming to cultivate. When and how that’s delivered is highly variable, depending on the client and work being done. What have you found to be a good mitigating practice for avoiding the “fragmentation pitfall” with IFS?
@@stephenvankleeck4801 great question. There's a few ways to mitigate this that I can think of. One way is to do a more "soft" approach to parts work, where we are honoring these aspects of experience without getting too far down the rabbit hole of roles and ages of parts, etc. In my experience, if we shift the emphasis away from narrative and into the way the parts are relating-- bringing a secure relational style between the parts-- as the emphasis, it tends to help feel the connection rather than the distinction between parts. Another thing I'll do is simply help people to re-access states of wholeness and spiritual connection, getting them in touch with the "true Self", and then work with parts from that perspective. Another is to get the person to hold both the awareness of the part in their attention, along with awareness of complete other aspects of themselves that are not the part at the same time, to heighten this awareness that "I am more than this part". Another simple one is to have them dialogue with the part, which implicitly means that there is an "I" that is not the part, essentially unblending. Or going into a mindfulness / meditation / observer state, and working with the part that way. Or doing what in NLP is called a "parts integration", which can help resolve these conflicts, and then bring that new united part into the wholeness. Another approach is to use Connirae Andreas' Wholeness work, which moves people from parts to spiritual wholeness. Or just even to clearly frame with the person that parts work is a metaphor, a tool, and to hold our understanding of it loosely as just a useful concept to work with ourself. Many ways to get there, and it really just depends on what the person needs in the moment
@@infinitedurr Thank you for sharing. I love the dynamism you’re presenting. It’s so important to be able to gauge and meet people where they are! I also work with processing people in altered states of consciousness and recently heard Schwartz warn against using altered states to bypass Protectors and that when we do that there’s “Protector Backlash” when the person returns to baseline. Have you encountered this dynamic in your work? I’ve encountered clients who’s Protector was not willing to give any space but I’ve never actually tried to access an Exile directly because of my training, where you always meet the Protector as it emerges and engage curiously with it. Interested if you have experience with bypassing the Protector due to the altered state.
@@stephenvankleeck4801 Yeah! I hear about and see a lot of it online by other practitioners! I make a verrrrry clear point of not using medicine to do this, but rather getting as much consent (ideally full consent) from all parts before even taking the medicine. This understanding has really shifted my emphasis to doing a lot more prep work, including a lot of therapy and nervous system support up front before any medicine comes into the picture so that the person feels super resourced, and we are already in touch with any parts offering objections or wanting our attention. My intention is to be an ally and friend to all parts of the person, and we dont go forward with the session until we get clear consent. Secure attachment with all parts is super key. Without that present, I've seen people have some pretty severe retraumatization. And then they come to me for help because I'm not pushing them to do more medicine, but instead to connect with and honor what they didnt want to before. It's sometimes a slower path in, and we end up doing a lot of therapeutic work up front, but the results are much smoother and safer.
I keep a small but precious virtual “shrine” of male elders/heroes that I look up to and turn to for guidance. Richard is on there deservedly. He’s a healer in the truest sense of the word.
This one had me balling my eyes out. This hit so close to home. I didnt realize that Aubry and I had such a similar childhood. My father ended up serving a 16 year sentence for the abuse he did to me and my younger siblings and mothers. I was the oldest boy so I got the brunt of his severe alchoholic rage. I was 18 when he went to prison. Being the oldest son I got the brunt of the daily drunken rage beatings. Its a miracle im even alive after all the loaded shotguns ive had in my mouth and how many times I was beaten unconscious for trying to step in front of his rage to become his target to save my younger sisters and brothers. Unfortunately when he finally got caught and went to prison the suffering did not stop their for me. Being the oldest son of such a horrific man that hurt so many people I was judged by all the people I loved and everyone just assumed id be just like him even though my entire lifes goal has been not to be anything like him. So essentially at a young age I lost absolutely everything. Homeless at 16 years old. No one to rescue me. I continued to suffer for many many years from the devastating ripple his abuse and actions caused. Now I have 2 daughters of my own and a loving wife with a beautiful living relationship. Finally have a family once again after being all alone for so long because of another mans terrible actions. Its been a looooong road for me as well my friend. Its so nice to finally begin to heal.
@@reddithsh I appreciate you saying that very much my friend 🙏 I honestly feel like its the other way around though. I am so grateful for everything I have now. That is one of the beautiful things about going through such horrors in life. It has made me so thankful and grateful for everything I have no matter how small. I pray in the shower every day just to have running water and be so blessed to be able to bathe. Anything above that like having 2 beautiful healthy duaghters and a faithful loving wife! Im beyond fortunate and blessed at that point. With great blessings comes great responsibility also. But when youre so grateful for those blessings the responsibility is fully welcome and embraced. I just want to do better and try harder every day to earn what I have been blessed with. I think being in a state of greatfullness and being able to fully forgive all that have hurt me so deeply is the only path to obtain true joy and happiness.
@@joshuacollins2392 That is so, so powerful to me for you to write these words and convey this message to me! I cant even explain how much this means to me my friend. It feels like god speaking directly to me with confirmation to hang in there and that im on the right path and all my love and good intentions have not gone unoticed. With all of my heart and soul, thank you and Namaste 🙏
This is by far the best podcast with Dick Schwartz I've seen (and I've seen quite a few). I recognized so much in the work Aubrey did, having had the same dad with profound anger and abandonment issues. But what struck me most was how I apparently seem to do some things intuitively similar to Aubrey. For instance, since I started doing IFS a couple of weeks ago, I've started to build this internal world. First, I needed a place for my managers to hang out, so I made up this beautiful waiting room. Then, there came a door to a mesmerizing garden. Now, there is a huge kitchen and an upstairs with rooms like in a castle. And it continues to grow and grow. This is where my managers and, so far, one exile live. I never heard of anyone having a place like this, amazing. Thank you so much for this excellent work and the fascinating discussion with Dick.
My therapist has been doing these sessions with me and it’s so healing. Just watched Tim Ferris do a session with Dick, now Aubrey, and I feel the bond with these gentlemen dealing with similar parts as me and feel connected to them because of their vulnerability. Someone else said this is the new masculine and I’m so grateful to be in this time of development in humans.
I think this beautiful -remember we don’t need to be trained to do this, this happens naturally when we go within and allow it to happen. Promise! It’s happened to me and still does! This is so powerful! Healing is such a jubilant process!
It's the most intuitive therapy ever for me. I'm doing it by myself, and after some practice with the steps of unburdening, I find that I naturally go from one step to the next. I love it!
wow! so amazing! this is the new masculinity: strength, depth, honesty, complexity, vulnerability, sensitivity, compassion, etc. love love love this. thank you both for showing it's possible to heal and evolve and to care for one another and ourselves in this new and remarkable way.
This podcast just helped me work through something big that I've been holding onto since childhood, and it's a pretty amazing relief and overwhelming. Thank you AGAIN Aubrey, your vulnerability amidst your strength allowed me to open up to myself and know I can be vulnerable in this way and not feel guilty or be afraid. Praying for all of you
Having been an on again/off again user of SSRIs, I can absolutely confirm Dr Schwartz's observation of how meds have a place, but are not a final solution. They kept me alive through suicidal periods, but at their full capacity (when I felt totally "okay") I could never really reach those true aspects of self and move forward in healing. Thank you both for this wonderful, intimate exchange.
Through IFS I've found intimacies beyond what I have ever known. The intimacies I've found with the invisible world sound so clearly and with compassion. I want to believe they are souls that have come before me and have returned to assist me. History of abuse and disabilities that have kept me from fitting in with the world around me has been a blessing. Undistracted by being like everyone else. I am encouraged to be unique. My enemies who died are letting me know I'm protected.
heard it said before, "the True Self cannot be damaged". I figure its not just me, on Our journey to healing, one can never get tired of hearing that 💎❤
POWERFUL! Everyone should watch this to learn who we really are and how complex we are. THANK YOU both for making this information available and showing how it works. Aubrey, awesome job!
Thank you Aubrey for your courage and vulnerability. You do not hold back! Once in a meditation I asked what unconditional love really feels like and what I heard, felt, understood "Nothing is held back"...I really took my time with that one! NOTHING is held back. There is no punishment or judgement. It also felt like accountability for what I do have in my life and how much has been given to me at the right time right place. Its all there when I'm ready!! I feel your purpose is exactly that! Keep your heart open Aubrey. You are a blessing! Love to you and big gratitude to Dick for being someone who could hold space for you and be one of your guides in this life. Hope to meet you in person one day...
This helped me so much! Thank you for sharing so vulnerably. I went to speak to my protector who was 6 year old, and she was really angry at me for all the times when she was warning me and I didn't listen. Realised I have to rebuild trust with her step by step and take her alongside on a journey where she can witness me navigating things from a centered place. Felt so healing to have this realisation...
Ive seen and done it all and no system of psych/spirituality has helped me more than IFS. It gave an ammount of relief and peace that i cant even describe but i can say that it probably saved my life
WOW Aubrey!!! Thank you so much for sharing this! I was entranced as I felt like I was going through the experience with you. This is such powerful healing that you have chosen to give freely to all who can receive it. I love your strength, your vulnerability, your openness and honesty, and the powerful energy you bring to all your creations. You’ve built a personal bond with your audience, which is truly rare in this format. I so appreciate all of the gifts that you bring to the world.
Love the parts work approach. This is what I’m most familiar with in both group and individual CBT or BHT. After I had done several EMDR and BLAST sessions over a month I continued parts work with assistance and support for the next 13 months, 4 hours a day, 5 days a week. And the work didn’t stop there is actually every day if I’m truly checking in consistently. I created a “safe” place .. could be a house or anything, mine is a cave in the mountains. It’s imagined to great detail. It’s where all my parts meet, those versions of me at various ages and stages of my life, as well as my highest self. My highest self speaks directly to all or any my parts at the table inside, whatever the need is but just to speak directly to them as my highest self, parenting them loving them as it were. It’s such meaningful work and once I had that space I could go there anytime by myself to regulate and resolve.
Wow I can see where this type of therapy could be beneficial to all types of issues in the mind that are unseen to the one self!❤Thank you I appreciate you being so vulnerable 😢
I was listening to this Podcast while out on my daily walk and once Aubrey got into his discussion with his 4 year old part I just felt a wave of emotion move over me. It brought me to tears as I walked and listened. I'm confused as to what I was feeling and now as I reflect what I should do with those feelings. This feeling is all new for me. Perhaps I have a 'part' that needs some help... but I don't know the first step.
This has also happened to me a few times and I believe it’s a resonance with another human’s parts of with their Self. Something to discover, like a distant voice asking for help whose language is emotion in our body.
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IFS has helped me so much to the point that I study the system to be able to pass on the gift of this model ❤ thank you Richard and Aubrey for sharing
Im not even halfway but im compelled to give gratitude for the level of honesty and courage that Aubrey is showing in this video. Thank you for sharing this! Thank you for teaching me many things, thank you for guiding me to parts of myself that i've not had courage to explore on my own (in this video and many others, over many conversations)! Greetings from Bulgaria!
Thanks so much for this demonstration, your vulnerability and willingness to put yourself out there to help others is so beautiful and as a therapist extremely helpful!
I learned that I have a two-year-old part or younger one in diapers who got spanked and yelled at on two separate occasions, and the baby needed a hug and to be held. I cried, and now it is time to heal this wounded child. So good! This is really powerful therapy. My heart warmed up, too, and that I feel is my Higher Power. But that name does not really name what it is. It is unnamable, and I'm speechless.
Amazing! I have not heard of IFS before, but it seems to be exactly what I was looking for! Thank you for sharing Aubrey and all the work that you do! 🎉
This is awesome. It really shows how working with parts requires labor and effort. Considerable attention is required in order to move the scene to completion. If I have done the work to get in the scene, i might as well continue as far as i can to get to completion but i find it is hard because i get excited and antsy and I want to take myself out of the experience due to the amount of emotional labor required.
Been doing this and medicine combination with my therapist and have been making huge strides! Thank you for sharing and beating a beating heart beacon ❤! Would love to podcast with you Aubrey
AUBREY, you are so precious, for the amount of exploration you do in the domaine of healing work, to be able to share with words that world is the biggest gift one can offer the world, i can feel my journey of healing being reinforced by yours, and it is such an important time to clean the ground before the coming maybe or in general.of children, right, i love you, your sensitivity is a blessing, these days, people are dissinsetized so much, taking wild animals like they own their lives, dropping bombs on each other, going to war on each other, it seems that we have made absolutely no progress, so to have your presence is a real thing for i, highly sensitive, blessings, more blessings, curiosity is not a weakness but a genius state, consciousness and altruism is the natural evolution and nature of our beingness, innocence is the natural joy of our experience on earth, on and on, if anything feels negative, find the higher frequency, that is why negative exists, it is the beginning of all things to survive, this time is higher in frequency, every one can take the perspective from the second floor and admire tve view a little bit more, metaphorically, what a time... Shadow work could be done with 10-12 or even 8 years old, to bridge with generation, i hope its ok to mention the work of Richard Rudd, the gene keys, such bible of higher frequency thruout 64 words, we can change our world with new words.........so greatfully yours...
I think its really cool to see how much Richard's work has grown and become mor and more influential in the Psychological mainstream. Thank you for platforming him Aubrey, i this could kno we ledge that could help exstinguish much of the unnecessary suffering experienced amongst the "mental health crisis" or anyone walking through life in the hellish dissociated and fragmented conscious-state &/or sense self that im scared to think so many others go through and have gone too. Thank you❤
This method resonated and processed the most for me as well and I love that you went with the part to the scene 🎬 and allowed imagination to teach you in symbology and allegory if you will , looking deeper in those possible representations. Openness and vulnerability and accountability under the grace of change coming from confession in honesty, so healing. So happy for you and proud to watch a person do this work and be so open. 🎉
Thank you SO very much for this interview! I was looking for a good therapeutic modality and therapist for myself and family and now I’m so much clearer on what type to seek. Sending so much love and gratitude!
Amazing podcast! Aubrey your vaularabilty is absolutely beautiful i cried many times throughout so powerful i watched a second time and cried again. I have read dicks book no bad parts many times addressing my parts and witnessing the profound awareness of me. I have my first session booked with an ifs practitioner in a few days, im looking forward to meeting my parts, embracing and loving them for keeping me safe through all the crappy times, letting them know im greatful for all there purpose and its ok and i need to take over now. Thank you Aubrey and Dick. Many blessing to you both. 🙏 ❤
Wow! Thank you both so much for this Beautiful example of what is possible with IFS and an open heart. I had the privilege of experiencing IFS with Ketamine and was able to get to and heal a part that was deep in the core of my being. I can breathe deeply now and feel my wholeness in a way I’ve never been able to. I am able to bring that wholeness to all my relationships and my work with clients 🙏♥️🔥✨
The hard thing with IFS is once you learn the method, some of your parts learn it too and they get wise. The best sessions I had was when I was ignorant to the process. Once I figured out how it worked I feel the firefighter parts started driving the sessions. I believe 100% in the power of this therapy but without a very astute therapist who can recognise the evolution of the firefighters that start masking and adapting it becomes a bit of a useless loop. I want to be clear that every form of therapy is like this. You can't break through that surface until you recognise the fact that parts of you will fight really hard to keep protecting and even manipulate your responses that the therapist has to take on face value. I get this sense from this session that some answers are a bit too slick. I don't doubt the sincerity of the intention here, I just see from experience that there might be another part trying to make a cool podcast and appease a 'mentor' in an attempt to keep the focus off of an exile.
Great observation. It’s true, we have many “self-like” parts that have positive intentions but have a covert agenda. The podcast / mentor being present could definitely activate protectors that want to please or receive praise for “doing ifs well” to showcase its power.
1) This is awesome. 🙏 2) I understand My Children’s fascinations with each of their own world-building endeavours. 🙏 Thank You for increasing My fascination with this experience of Being Human. This conversation has been Life-changing. 💚💚💚
Thanks for the work. My 4 year and 7year old self came up right now...and there was a half animal/human (almost vampire like) thing had come, in the afternoon in my part of the world( before I heard this), as it had been feeling enraged for a while now, and wanted to kind of rip half the head,..and I'd even want to keep that animal-human thing, for it fights battles for me when needed...but I do need to work with the 7 Yr old who wants to be super protective and vigilant and has difficulty trusting and resting. As I listened to this, I was also doing somatic work, stretching and deep massaging to relax her, whose energy is more masculine. It's been helpful...and I realise somatic work is also important, for the body keeps the score.
Hi also had same experience, but sleep is reducing because of the parts been triggered always what to do ?do you have your number so that I can ask few doubts pls ...I am unable to sleep
Thank you so much, both of you, for sharing this "work" with us. It's so powerful, i believe much more so, f you are used to psychedelics. I could instantly access my protetors, inner child(s) experiences and needs, .... This was really helpful! 🙏❤❤❤❤
This is so beautiful. Aubrey is beautiful. IFS is beautiful. Thank you, Dr. Schwartz for bringing more beauty, healing, and compassion into our world with this powerful healing modality. ❤🎉
This damn resonated... When I listen about Aubrey's relationship with his father, about his parts tryin to protect this grown Man like 4 y.o... It's so familiar, thank you for this.
Yes! Schwsrtz said he suspected listeners were folliwing along in Aubrey's look at his Parts. Yes, I i did that, wholly. And, I too, came to The Snake, but it was not "resolved" only "seen". Very interesting. I work with an IFS practirioner, so i texted her about this Snake. Previously, I i identified Anxiety about to blow through a manhole cover and a Protector that forces the manhole cover shut and calls for backup: "Bring the alcohol, we're about to blow, here!" Now, in this moment, the Anxiety is more truthfully seen as Anger. Oh, I cant wait for our next IFS session! My Snake still wants to bite EVERYONE. Really, it's so great, IFS!! THANK YOU, AUBREY AND RICHARD!! ❤
IFS therapy moves toward internal harmony. I sometimes see IFS inappropriately portrayed merely as a parts identity process-“this part, that part,” etc. The modality concerns parts, their patterns-including sequences of activation or arrival-their polarizations (when present), and parts relationships with SELF-the capable coordinating internal Leader and effective source of healing.
Maybe the problem with the ancient trend for masters to become teachers/leaders/gurus is that it never occurs for students to publicly share their process. Imagine a world filled with media content containing this, just like this video of Aubrey. This demonstrates the courage the world needs the most, and it's so counterintuitive to the whole guru framework isn't it?
This has been fantastic! Thank you both for sharing this process with us. I’m finding it very similar to what’s called Soul Retrieval in Shamanism, where typically the shaman travels to the Lower, Middle and Upper World to find these pieces for the client. Or the person can be guided to find the pieces and negotiate to come back and integrate. I guess this connection of the IFS with these traditional shamanic techniques is well known?
I’m familiar with the Shamanic technique as well. I was wondering if this could be helpful for situations where the protector parts are scared and unwilling. A true Shamanic Healer can provide the strength and safety to help integrate the exiled parts - gradually, not all at once.
This work no parts is mesmerizing , it messed up my mind I am a normal guy, read the book i experimented all the exercises , i feel sad for me i am into something more tramatic and my sleep is reduced to 2 hours every day , these guys ... how they practice please help me doctor..
Sincere question…. As I watch, I dont observe the “therapist” actually doing anything except maybe there for support? What am I missing that an individual cant do the same thing on their own”??
Interested in the next level of this conversation? We are excited to share on our channel a groundbreaking interview with Dick, with the below description. In this fascinating conversation, Dick discusses for one of the first times the spiritual implications of working with parts of self. In line with many traditions of the ancient world, we appear to have many parts that we are not consciously aware of. Though most of those parts belong to us, and are best integrated and healed, some parts do not. It is these that need to be removed, and their apparent sentient nature shakes up much of what current, scientific psychology is willing to see and accept. No matter what your views, you will be fascinated by Dick’s honest report of his decades of experience working first-hand at the crossroads of psychology and spirituality. Clinical evidence has shown that IFS works, and it is one of the most widely trained psychotherapy interventions today. We cannot, then, easily dismiss Dick’s wealth of clinical experience. The implications of this conversation are immense and only beginning to be understood. Deep gratitude to both Dick and his guides for their willingness and clarity in giving this thirsted-for guidance to the psychedelic provider community.
Sensitive souls brought up in insensitive environments become somewhat fragmented because intuitively they know its not "safe" to be your true God given self.
That’s an indicator that, if you’re still called to parts work, you should be doing it with a trained practitioner. You’re likely highly blended with parts in extreme roles. It’s not a problem, just information about your inner landscape. ❤
Aubrey I think you're a wonderful man I love that you can show your emotions please let your wife know that she is a lucky woman not many men show how they are really feeling and that is what is impressing to me
Can anyone share a link for a resource for me to get in touch with a type of therapist like this? Can anyone tell me how I can get Ketamine prescribed so I can utilize this for theraputic purposes? Aubrey is always talking about using ketamine and thc and I would really like to try that for myself. Ive had a lot of deap trauma in my life and feel I could really benfit from this.
The IFS Institute has a directory of IFS Practitioners & Therapists, with a Search function - you could search for psychadelic assisted therapy. Or google for that. I would choose someone who you vibe with and who is both experienced and Certified in IFS. (There are a lot of 'IFS informed' people out there who haven't trained in the model with the IFS Institute, and who don't have such a great understanding nor depth of experience with it.)
