37:30 Welcome to the club. I've been single for about 5 years. I'm also a divorcee, and definitely much older than the 3 of you. I'm very deep on the extreme side of the introvert scale. So that 5 years of singlehood has been probably the most peaceful time of my life. I wake up, go to work, when I knock off, all I want to do is go home and spend some time with my dog (when he was still alive), even if I'm not tired. I will almost always decline friends' or colleagues' invites to hang out after work because I hate getting home after 9pm on a weekday. Weekends, I'm extremely happy staying in alone, avoiding crowds, noise, and the hassle of dressing up, sweating etc. Don't get me wrong. I want to get married again. I want to have a family. I want to be able to share my joys and sorrows with a spouse and vice versa. I want to listen to my kids' tell me about their day, about their struggles, about their triumphs, to share life experiences with them, to give them life advice and then let them make their own decision and make their own mistakes, and learn and grow, and decide their own path for their life. But I've become way too comfortable with being with myself, being by myself. The peace that comes from never ever having another human in your own home to have conflicts with, to fight with. At my age, and with my introverted-ness, and the past years of calm and quiet in the home......it's hard for me to imagine that dream coming true. Not that I no longer believe in it. I just think it's going to be really difficult for me. I've become too used to being single that the benefits I get is just really huge to let go. For an extrovert, those benefits will definitely not have as much of a pull as they do for a very strong introvert.
Love is hard work, rejection is easy. Only takes one reason, not enough height, not enough looks, not enough $, not enough whatever etc. Love requires sacrifice. don't sweat the small stuff, sweat the big ones. to the young lads watching this. :)
Thanks Sonia for sharing your insights. They are very relevant and true. A stable partner is someone who can make you feel safe and secure with occasional adventures to spice the relationship up. They are also someone who is willing to work things out when shit hits the fan and would choose you over and over again, vice versa…
I am 35 I still single and I Never ever have any relationships before. I have be rejected over and over again. I really feel sad and lonely but what to do life still have to go on.
I don't know why being in a relationship and getting married is like the be all and end all of life for some people. Human beings are more than just a mate, wife/husband, or parent. We are multifaceted beings and should not be narrowly defined by our relationship status. Anyway, I posit that questions like "why you're still single?" "when are you going to get married" "why no bf/gf" etc (usually on the part of kaypoh relatives etc) are actually subtle and covert attempts at controlling others by forcing one's views on what should be the correct way to live life on them.
21:19 not true for everyone... last time at school no one fancied me... i was this nerd introvert, makes me feel odd for not having relationships in sec school/poly/uni.. no teenage love experience at all...:(
Q ! yeh I agree with Q, vibe online... but when meet up err .... you know ... like... okay. I prefer some one who not only debate. but bicker. not to be confused weith nagging. but guys that stench is real ! Its one thing to do the same things together and another to enjoy each other's hobbies or what they enjoy doing. If there is one thing for your alone time, keep it that way. hence don't do everything together ! I always tell my partner if its your alone time and stuff to do during your alone time let me know ? I`ll go back to the man cave to game or model kit or something.
I'm good luck Chuck too, good on them! Sometimes I feel bad because, maybe I'm thrash, so the next one would contrast really well, hahaha! Anyhow, this video made me feel normal, I am semi-active in dating and have been single 9 years going 10, damn! I do proclaim being a red flag tho but most red flags would not admit to them being actually red flags? oh well! And I am generally thought as a "good catch". how old is Hargaohunk? I thought he YP, but actually not that young haha, I like him, you gained a follower! Also, I didn't know Sonia Chew was so young! (not implying she doesn't look the part, its the way she present herself, was always mature and all). I agree dating apps have ruined romance in general! Anw this podcast should have had some married rep lah abit too one sided, altho I'm team non-Married!
My only relationship was with my hand, left hand to be precise😅. Do i want a partner? Yes, for sex definitely but i must also say its for love for the sake of political correctness 😅. Unlike me, to most of you, sex is totally not a reason for a relationship. You are good. So honest
not tryna prove anything but if Sonia didn’t date around so much in the past bfr meeting her current partner, it wouldn’t have/still be working out… aka if Sonia met him during her 2nd/3rd/4th rs, it wouldn’t have bear fruits… my opinion
well, you're entitled to your own opinion and i am not saying i'm right but my personal opinion is that maybe we can also be more empathetic towards people we don't actually know and how things might have been like for them in the past. Often people use the word red flag too loosely without fully considering the possibility that some individuals simply need time and support to heal from their past experiences- and i would like to point out that she's self aware which is the first step towards anything. a red flag will probably be someone who blames the other partner for all the things that has happened without taking accountability.
I think the problem is the lady with a cap,will not really able to commit a relationship.Cos she already say just small matter will trigger her...and she definitely will break up with the guy too.
some of the comments in this comment section is really L 😓 anyways thanks for the podcast, interesting to hear from different perspectives! i think it's good/respectful that people who are picky respects the other party for being picky too, it being mutual is very okay in this context
I labeled myself as No boyfriend since birth. I am 28 and I already have my masters degree in Teaching English. I've been teaching for 8 years. They said I am beautiful,but can't find the man that matches my vibe. However, I am a firm believer that God will give the things that are best for you,so no pressure at all.❤
i think it'll be nice to have LGBT guests too on this podcast to discuss and weigh in on being single too.. sometimes its could be not by choice to stay single.. 😥 btw nice episode still!
Put God at the centre of the relationship, grow and serve each other and others together. Romans 7-8 : the fallen human nature is inherently rebellious against God. The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. (proverbs 31) And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever. Man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.
Q is "romance-seeker" Nick is "my own bubble must be intact whilst creating a new bubble with my life-partner" Tough in this day and age to have these two merging harmoniously. My best wishes to you all
