@@PhlegmBoHiggins Odd, So your saying your ok with someone doing bad things to you knowing it's bad and knowing it will hurt you instead of someone that does the same thing not thinking that it would hurt you. I'm going to take that as someone not responding appropriately and bow out of this conversation.
“Imagine you want something. Now imagine how you would get that thing if your brain could not feel guilt or empathy”. That explanation did it for me, thanks
I have fewer than 1 friend in the World. That's right. Everybody disses me for making bad videos. I think they are perfect though. Who is right? My dissers or me? Which side are you on, dear ice
Yes, you are correct! I worked for one for 17 years. I feel so sorry for his wife! He had an explosion toward his wife at work one day & it was heartbreaking to see the effect of it on her and to realize that she has to go home to that every day after working for him in the office. I think he could easily turn a woman into a Lorena Bobbit! 😬😳😱
@@karynbanksley7110 Wow you are evil, aren't you. Instead of doing the right thing and ending the relationship. You rather there be violence. You are sick in the head.
I can be very warm, in a social setting, and in a good mood trusting that others have an understanding of boundaries. However, they don’t, if they are the sociopath. My friendliness and trusting nature could be taken wrong on their part. Then they may think I am like Jekyll & Hyde. So the problem is in the dynamics, timing, and setting; and a matter of interpretation.
Keep in mind that while the prevalence may be around 1 in 30 population wide. The occurrence in a given group will vary widely. A room full of politicians may have a prevalence of 1 in 2. Seven foot tall humans is a good example. They are a rare sight but not at an NBA game. The 'paths will self select as well as drift towards certain occupations and social circles.
Yesss, but. Territorial, highly mobile socially, and on average imbalanced in the stability of their lives. You very likely will meet them more often than you'd like to.
I’ve seen the sociopath stare a few times in my life and it is a big red flag. Don’t ignore it. Don’t ever ignore when you feel uncomfortable around anyone either.
I do the 'psychopath stare' because I don't blink often (about 3 times a minute on average). I'm extremely empathetic, I'm just autistic... I dunno why not blinking is such a red flag. But ok. I'm sorry that kinda thing is scary for some of you folks.
@@robokill387 Ermmm, I'm autistic and generally make great first impressions, I'm tactful, fairly charismatic, and most people find me pretty interesting. I have high cognitive empathy but my affective empathy is not as good because I'm alexithymic, and if you're not in touch with your own emotions, affective empathy isn't going to be used very well. But my cognitive empathy is way higher than most NT peoples, so it more than balances out. If someone saw my autistic traits and thought 'they're too charming so MUST be a sociopath! I'm being mAnIpUlAtEd' it'd be a real shame. I don't know if I'd want to be friends with people who made such harsh judgements about neurodiverse behaviour instead of looking for real behavioural problems. I honestly don't understand the fear of sociopaths anyway. I'm WAY more scared of people with 'fully functioning empathy' who choose to turn it off to certain people, ie racism, sexism, ableism, homophobia, transphobia. I think horrible behaviour is scary, regardless of what emotional range the person has anyway.
@@qwandary i mean, @JS is not wrong. It is true that there is autistic people/ people with other with conditions or just people in general who just doesn’t blink. But it is also true that sociopath are more likely to stare longer/ don’t blink as much. Of course I get your point that there is other conditions where people aren’t sociopaths and just don’t blink as much and it would definitely be detrimental if you think anyone who stare longer would be a sociopath.
I went through it. Thought dude was my best friend. Loved him. He didnt even show any signs until we became roommates. He flipped overnight. Started trying to make me think i was crazy and almost create like a submissive relationship. Little did he know i wasn't the one. Moved out in a week
I would like to mention, as someone with autism who wasn't diagnosed as a child, looking at people's eyes tends to bring me a sense of unease and extreme discomfort, bordering on pain. Growing up I was always told that it's cowardly, and dishonest to avoid eye contact and it shows you aren't interested in the other person. So I started making myself look at people's eyes when talking to them. Nobody ever told me that too much eye contact can be creepy so I assumed that not blinking would be better. I also had to teach myself manually to blink when talking to people. That sociopath stare isn't always done by sociopaths.
My family spent most of my life assuming I must be autistic like my eldest cousin on that side of the family (we're only a few months apart), and went through years of them having me deal with school specialists and others I sought out in my earlier adult life to try finding out why I have some symptoms of a number of things, only to always be told I'm normal, or with the what little I was able to get myself, determined that I do (or rather, then did) have depression. Then about a year and a half ago with having to go through multiple teams of psychologists, psychiatrists, various kinds of therapists, etc. for something else, they released me from the state hospital with all kinds of diagnosis that one team reached, the other ruled out, etc. and left with the inclusion of suspected autism. Then the psychologist I had to deal with before going to the state hospital gave a final report that basically has nothing more than ruling that I am not autistic. But there was never a diagnosis in all my paperwork for Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder or others that had shared symptoms. My grandmother still insists she knows psychology better than the professionals (she was a park ranger and later mostly just a realtor and co-owner of an RV park, no psychology training at all) and claims I am autistic. Just because one shows symptoms of, does not necessarily mean one has. Add to that, I'm in my 30's and because of changes and people refusing to communicate the rules of communication (add to that, it varies by group), I still often offend people without intention because people don't like to talk about social rules and don't like to tell people what they did wrong so they can improve.
Yeah it's typical in Autism. Even minor forms of autism like nld. I read a story about a kid that didn't look right to the other kids. They beat him up. Look at Chris Rock too. He only has nld which is like Asperger's. Violence is just a part of the Autistic life and we just need to learn to get used to it. Because society will never side with us. Unfortunately it's not us perpetuating the violence. I work in a school and everyday I see the hate towards Autism.
I was raised in a home with very little, if any, empathy or compassion expressed by my father or mother. I did not see it or learn it. So I remember wanting to feel empathetic all of my life. Most of my life was spent trying to mimic empathy. Now, at 67 years old, after a hard life, I developed empathy and it is so beautiful.
The thing that confuses and concerns me, is every time I watch a list of sociopathic traits, I see several that describe me, except I still feel empathy - sometimes too much.
same. i have all these but my empathy is so strong it can be debilitating at times. so idk i guess we fall into an extreme because of our intense experience with the spectrum emotions and absorbing others' energies. one thing alot of these aspd people have in common (and with us ) is their mastery of energy manipulation albeit with a lack of truly experiencing another;s emotions. i think whne you have an extreme relationship with emotions/empathy like being hyper empathic or not having it all, you become very familiar with energy and transmutation
You don't need to be a full blown sociopath to exhibit a lot of these behaviors. Especially when it comes to taking advantage of people and being manipulative in certain situations - this behavior isn't uncommon in our society but being a sociopath is a rare disorder.
My sister has the stare. Sometimes only the whites of her eyes show. She does this to people and family she'd like to be or be in. She's very empathic to a fault. But is manipulative. I call her out when she's in public doing that to someone so she'll stop. It's very embarrassing. She has a fascination with death and dead things. It grosses me out. She's a healthcare worker for the elderly. She likes to be in the face of someone dying and that is the freakiest thing. Sometimes I think her empathy is a cover up but now it's become a part of who she is just like the fascination with death. At times she's on the road looking at dead deer. I ask her what she's doing she said .. trying to find out why it died. Excuse me ..it was hit by a car..you can't see the internal damage. I think her care there.... is a cover up for looking at it. At times she can be very mean also. I know a lot of these people. They have fooled most people. When growing up my sister and I got it shoved into our heads to stop worrying about someone else and only worry about yourself. Isn't that a good thing to teach children. I'd like to blood type these people and I bet 1 group would be way bigger than others.
@@screamsella v interesting. do u find though that your manipulation is done to genuinely make people feel better for their own well-being or is it for your own agenda?
@@rebbouhhind2580 i think you meant disgust but yeah these people dont like pure kindness and their face reveals their true nature when confront to other people being really happy as they become jealous or try to take the front stage talking louder etc....
Yeah, I know! Just because it's antisocial personality disorder, they think Aspd is the same as antisocial, as in socially awkward. And also, they think that a quiet person is a serial killer (generalization, but okay).
Yep I already got called psychopath from my whole life only because I don't have friends I don't cry often when someone dies also I like to watch snuff gore movies true crime and also I find some kindo of thrill when I see blood lol
The easiest way to flush out a sociopath is to observe their actions. A person can literally say anything, but their actions will always expose their true nature.
Ive seen their behavior…and i felt very sorry for him he still got his trauma when he’s still a child…i wanted to help him out but i know he wouldn’t approach nicely …kinda aggressive i guess…very controlling but i want to help him to see him doing nice things.
@@justmyopinion3450 I'm already very familiar with it. But unless all of these things are just all and always the dark triad, that still doesn't help with distinguishing.
@@JudeMichaelPeterson Ultimately, for any normative human, the differences aren't as important as identifying they are toxic and keeping interaction to a minimum, to prevent harm to oneself. But as I see it, one can be a plain narcissist, who are simply two year olds that never matured. Or one can be a sociopath, who enjoy manipulating and damaging others, who also have narcissistic tendencies. Both behavioral, induced by upbringing. You can distinguish them by their effectiveness in charming others and how they respond to being stymied. Narcissists throw tantrums. Sociopaths attempt to make you pay. Or one can be a psychopath, who have genetic differences in brain function and simply do not care about humans, seeing them as tools. Some psychopaths take care of their tools as long as they are of use. Some actually enjoy breaking their tools when they are finished with them. Others set them aside against future usefulness. Narcissists and sociopaths will murder and justify it to themselves. Psychopaths kill and see nothing wrong with it. This is how I see it, you may disagree. Cheers.
As a middle aged man that was very recently diagnosed with ASPD, I can confirm most of these things. I tend to scare people without trying. And once I grew up a bit, I began to notice the instincts I have and my compulsion to manipulate and dominate were not getting me anywhere. I therefore realized that I needed to re-learn my pattern of thought in order to stop hurting myself and others in my life. I've been attending trauma therapy and cognitive behavioral therapy. It's been a lot of work. I hope I can be a force to build and leave a positive impact someday, instead of rotating through jails and institutions and lovers for no good reason.
You can do anything you set your mind to do. I believe good always wins over evil. Maybe becoming spiritual/God loving and fearing may help? I wish you all the best!
People with antisocial personality disorders regularly use therapy as a lie and do nothing to change. You're correct though. If you don't change, you will repeat the same cycle over and over again. There's no long-term benefit to manipulation. Only more enemies and people that leave you behind. It's a survival technique and will do the job, but that's about it.
I worked with a sociopath once and it is an experience I would never like to repeat. You don't realize what's going on until it's too late. I would recommend this: if you find yourself telling someone a lot about your life and feel almost a compulsion to divulge your secrets, stop immediately and step away from the relationship. The other person is mining you for information about yourself that he or she can use against you. Never assume that another person's intentions toward you are benevolent. A lot of times your worst enemy can present themselves like they're your best friend, or at least someone you can trust. Always be on your guard against manipulation.
@@rpgtips3802 probably did (if your comment was directed to me). I have been too trusting too quickly in the past. And I’m a naturally generous person so I guess I give off those signals. But I’m finally learning TG..
Only learning the hard way after the fact but looking forward to never falling for it again, thank you fir your comment it's exactly part of my story 🖐
1) lack of empathy 2) urge to manipulate 3) feels good to be around them (they become what you want) too good to be true 4) the stare (doesn’t look away or blink) 5) lies without remorse and have can’t show natural emotions. Inappropriate emotions for the situation
Urge to manipulate, feels good to be around them, the stare, doesn’t show emotion, “inappropriate” reactions to situations. _On the surface,_ it’s the basic description of a scorpio, lol
to be fair, " Inappropriate emotions for the situation" sounds like group think or peer pressure to me. A man told me today how he was shocked by how unaffected his sister was at someone's death and the someone turned out to be a famous ballplayer neither of them had ever met. Some people are too emotional and it is silly to fake emotions.
@@minor_2nd I don't think most are really sociopathic at all, unless there's induced trauma. There is no real distance from emotion and being overwhelmed is common, among other things that's the opposite of sociopathic traits.
The greatest red flag I recommend people develop a heightened awareness of is charisma. Not just a feeling of 'wow, that's a pretty cool guy', but when you're gut informs you that you've met very few people in your life so far with THAT type of impact. In my personal experience, I find sociopathy often goes hand in hand with charisma. It's why I'm extremely wary of celebrity fake Gods, all cultural architects and our sick culture in general which seems to worship anybody working in the entertainment industry (including the media); because these charismatic people are often so dark, man. What a sickness that we set up children to soak it all up.
someone with sociopathic tendencies wouldn’t even answer a yes to that question since cluster b disordered people don’t think there’s something wrong with them and don’t seek therapy, only a small percentage are willing to reflect on themselves
Yes you have a point there! I agree, it is true. But still it is not adviced to relate with them even if they are good. You should better keep your distance. If one of them is in your family or relative environment and you cant avoid them at least keep an eye on them and be carefull. Avoid trusting them.
There’s someone I’ve suspected of being a sociopath. They’re so charismatic, can never do any wrong. When I was pregnant, they would get angry and throw things at the wall beside me but then acted like I was over reacting because “I intentionally missed you, why are you upset?” That was a frequent question; why are you upset? They seemed to legitimately not understand. Glassy eyed stare was a norm.
@@glynnisthomas9165 As he was the father of the baby, that’s a lot easier said than done. Like I said above, sometimes you just have to learn how to deal with someone who scares you. He doesn’t scare me anymore, I hardly see him now that he’s moved.
It can when confirmation bias comes into play. If you've immediately decided someone is good or bad, your mind will start to look for reasons to back up your belief & discount any extra information that goes against what you've already decided.
@@justacoginthefkery guts never lies.... auras never lies... one look is all i need to tell if someone is a good person or a bad person... stay away from bad person...
@@mikescorpio13 Many ppl are not very in tune with their intuition & absolutely can & do mistake their own prejudices for a gut feeling. I've moved around a lot & met a lot of different ppl... you truly cannot tell who is good vs bad based on looks alone because most shallow generalizations & stereotypes (which is what most ppl use to place ppl in boxes) are absolute garbage.
@@mikescorpio13 the delusion that you have some sort of evolved sense of a persons character based on how they look and by extension how that persons appearance makes you feel is hilarious. Im not even going to mention 'aura'.
Kind of irrelevant to the video, but Gregory House is not a sociopath. If you guys actually watch the show, you'll see that he cares a lot when nobody is watching. He simply has an avoidant type of attachment.
He cares about nothing but the truth. He may seem like a d*ck, but he knows what people are like, their weaknesses and what lengths they are willing to go to (by lying) to achieve something.
Well said. I was about to type this. Also, I don't remember what is the exact symptom or illness, but I read that due to his leg injury House became incredibly susceptible to pain, whether it be physical or emotional. So besides feeling pain due to the leg, if House is injured, troubled, or has a headache, whatever he feels it'll be 10 times worse compared to the average person, which is why he avoids emotional attachments as best as he can. House grabs his leg whenever he is suffering emotionally. A good example is in Season 6, when he tells Wilson that if he where to die, he'd be forever alone. Greg sits down and clenches his leg. There's a plethora of other examples like this in the show. People think it's just the physical pain that torments House, but it's not entirely true.
Yup, I was raised and abused by a sociopathic mother who had high narcissistic like qualities. The caveat was that she surprisingly impressed everyone outside the family, and was admired in our community. Her only goal was to manipulate and control, and put herself above everyone else. She could not care that she physically and mentally abused us, it was all about her feelings which mattered most. It’s difficult being around her, because while the abuse has ended now that I’m an adult and moved out long ago, I still pick up on these qualities and remember my own trauma. Therefore, it’s almost impossible for me to enter a relationship and connect with another woman. Even tho I’m 27, I’m still processing everything that was passed on to me.
Mines was quite like this too, she always wanted people to think highly of her and always said “what goes on in this house stays in this house”, I was called manipulative , psychopath, sociopath and honestly sometimes I felt like she was just projecting. It always questioned myself and whether or not I was or not. A conversation with her would always end up with her yelling. I wasn’t perfect as a teenager, but I did end up running away
Processing trauma isn't a race, and it takes serious guts to address issues caused by a narcissistic/sociopathic parent (I know from experience). I would highly recommend looking into therapy if you are able, and if not there are many self-help guides online that can provide help. I know people who set their minds and pasts at rest in their mid-thirties/forties, and I have so much respect for them. Your afterlife from trauma doesn't have to revolve around her too
Two of my brothers have zero empathy for what others go through. Good luck to anyone who have these jerks in their family. I have nothing to do with them.
Would you guys be willing to do a video on how lower energy introverts can deal with high energy extroverts? They're so draining and their energy can be both overwhelming and unrelatable. Just started your course, good stuff!
bruh simply cope, look at yourself in the mirror and say, "i HAVE energy. I CAN handle them". Lie to yourself, and if you lie to yourself for long enough, it will become true.
Don't put them in your life bro. Your needs come first. I understand the desire to have friends and a social life and all that but you have to put limitations and boundaries on people. Time limits can help. Try this: the next time you are hanging out with exhausting, soul sucking people, keep an eye on how long it takes before you start feeling drained. Then, no matter what that length of time is, keep a mental note of it and the next time you hang out, tell them upfront "I'll only be free today for x hours/minutes." This will improve the experience of being around them and protects you from being exploited by manipulative, clueless people.
I don't know why this person running my stuff and following me looking for reaction I don't know anyone not interested in knowing anyone but still he is obsessed with old man and so draining like I don't know these people in reality I never had single conversation with me still he's acting like a gold mine is stolen
My mom’s boyfriend always accused me of being a sociopath and it would always hurt my feelings. He would always make me think maybe I am one. After watching this video I know I’m not one. Edit- just wanted to thank everyone for being so nice. I don’t think I’ve ever been in a RU-vid comment section where people are this kind. Love you all!
Sounds like hes building a case against you. If he can convice your mom that you acting like a teen is really sociopathic behavior he can isolate her. No normal adult male would tell his gfs son that he was a sociopath.
I've met two sociopaths that made me suffer a lot and there is a common trace about them. They were relatively alone, without close friends or true liasons. In both cases, I met only their close relatives (who were there for family reasons) and one or two sporadic friends with whom I had only few and superficial contact. In both cases, I kept asking myself (subconsciously though) how such a sweet and smart person was somehow isolated and had to count on me so often. My prompt response was that they were highly sensitive and selective about their relationships. That excuse was very generous with my ego. And they certainly knew how to feed my ego with flattery and other taylor made tricks. Both of them appeared in my life out of nothing (casual encounters without any common friend or contact). Both of them were very VERY easy to get along with in the first months of interaction. (I'm not a native English speaker, so sorry for eventual mistakes)
@@joshualeahy2162 : Sociopaths are not clearly crazy or something alike. What they really do is making YOU feel crazy or something alike. They have intentions and methods that you would never guess while you "eat on their hands", as we say in Brazil.
You my friend said it all correct..! So I've also encountered sociopaths in my life but the one person who hurt me to bone and completely left me in shock was supposedly my one of the bestie (we were a trio and now its just me and my other bestie)..... I also met her randomly.... she incouraged me to share the hostel room with her.... I was like how helping and good natured she is... she called me her little sister....! We lived for 2yrs as roommates Surprisingly she never had any friends.. she said she hated her school she didn't had any friends in school also ... the only people she would talk to were her mom and her younger sister... she said that her cousins etc also didn't like her... I felt soo bad for her .... now I notice that due to all these things that she has told me I was extra empathetic towards her.... But OH MY GOD i pray to god to please protect people from such persons... I was lucky enough that me and my other bestie were there for each other ... and although we were hesitant about it one day we talked about it and everything began unfolding.... she was telling something to my bestie and something else to myself and also manipulating us to not tell the other person because she is too shy etc.... She did some really really bad things to us ....but exclusively to me..... still it haunts me that people can stoop thus low .... she have absolutely no empathy... Me and my bestie tried to talk it out with her that why she did it etc ... She had no answers at all ...... I said whatever it is I'll try correct it please I don't want this all to end up like this.... ( I was completely invested in her ...I genuinely cared for her especially she had called me her little sister 💔) But you now what she said?? " there is nothing, I never liked you and I don't care about you...." that moment my eyes immediately filled with tears...it felt like someone has stabbed me in the back, that's when I realized what it means .... I remember crying for weeks.... more for how shocking it was I never saw something like this would happen to me ....I remember it as a lesson for life... I'm over it now but I can never forget about it although I've tried but that little pain is still there.... I hope it will heal with time.... I just wish protection for all innocent good souls out there....❤🙏🏻
@@Neha-hr9fh : we never escape harmless from these traumas and we never get all responses we need to "close the case". Knowing how to deal with misteries of life is the key to learn with these experiences and to keep the faith in human nature.
I always hated people who never broke eye contact. Creeped me out no matter how friendly they were. Now I know those freaks are actually sociopaths. As an introvert, the fact that I sometimes avoid eye contact helped me to not be friends with them. Haha!
@@lorenzosyquia4769 it's kinda hard to talk about. This person would fake seizures and make threats of hurting himself if he didn't get his way, emotionally and financially manipulative, tried to ruin what was left of my relationships, was very controlling, gaslighted me, etc. On top of being in a really toxic relationship at the time and having a miscarriage, I tried killing myself. Luckily I survived, escaped, and my life has been a 180 since then.
@@electricsoup7481 I'm glad you survived it! You must have lived through hell. Was he jealous of your relationship? What made this person so appealing anyway?
This video describes my brother-in-law 100%. What a trail of destruction he has created in our family. If you observe sociopaths long enough, you'll start to observe strange behavior patterns, almost as if they're icy cold robots with no choice but to follow a certain programming. At heart, everything they do is centered around CONTROL.
Do they resemble narcissists? Specifically, people with NPD? I’m still demystifying a relationship that ended years and years ago with someone I suspected to have NPD. Until I saw this video and your comment. Your BIL shares familiar traits with my ex-relationship. Cold, just cold, and no emotions or empathy, except for a very explosive and reactive anger. And always needing and wanting to exert control over everyone and everything. The anger shows up when someone does something outside their rigid script of accepted behaviours. The person comes off as controlling, cold, and manipulative. Hmmm, maybe my own assumption about NPD was indeed wrong.
@@dylandonaghue6750 Sociopathy is a more extreme, more dangerous form of narcissism. Narcissism is basically, “The world revolves around me. Aren’t I wonderful? Give me attention! Worship me!” Narcissism is therefore essentially very childish and immature. But sociopathy takes self-centeredness much much further, and adds a twist: “Because the world revolves around me AND because I have no compassion for other people, AND because I have absolutely no sense of remorse, I will use and control you.’’ In short, I find narcissists merely annoying and exasperating whereas I find sociopaths destructive and potentially quite dangerous. I should add I am a layman. These are personal observations and reflections based on bitter experience.
@@todesque Btw, you are right that sociopathy is more dangerous to society in general. On fact, the narcisisst tends to be abusive to loved ones, but not society at large. As I said, they base their image on society's perception of them as a great person, so they cannot afford to have their adoring public hate them. That's often why when there are marital breakups or accusations of abuse, those outside the relationship are usually in disbelief that the narcisssist is the one who did anything wrong. That also illustrates the particular way in which they're manipulative.
@@todesque Yeah and IMO this video does not describe sociopathy, it describes psychopathy. Sociopaths can't function properly in society, they can't fake a normal life like psychopaths do, they're very easy to recognize because they can't control their reactions like psycopaths do. A sociopath will lose his cool over simple things, they usually have anger issues, problems with the law, problems with rules..all these first impressions, sociopath stare, this is all BS, sociopaths can't fake those things, you'll notice a sociopath as soon as you see one because they're NOT organized, they're loud, they're reckless and they look dangerous right off the bat.
- Cognitive empathy is a thing that sociopaths and psychopaths can and do feel and often intentionally cultivate. For some, it may be because they look at nature and realize humans are pack animals and community health is this important. Others believe strongly in individual autonomy, and thus will decide not to hurt others out of some cosmic respect. Still others simply decide to live by a moral code because they observe that this is the best way to stay out of prison, make AND keep money, and maintain a social circle of people willing to help you. - For many sociopaths and/or psychopaths, it’s less than they have urges to manipulate, and more that they’re lacking the barriers to manipulative behavior that most people have, and thus don’t see the logical point in NOT lying if it helps the situation.
Thus we understand why implementing the strategies from The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene, are effective as it requires pushing past the barriers that others won't, and why certain types of people are more successful than others in certain areas\ fields.
When you say "They can and do feel empathy" do you mean that all of them do just less frequently and/or less strongly, or do they need to come to a realisation about the world or form a belief/moral compass about the world in order to to feel empathy normally
Your gut feeling will still be initially repelled by a lot of these types of people. You’ll be a little weirded out by them or notice something slightly off about them on first impression. It isn’t until they begin charming you with their words that you start to relax around them. You’ll then trust them even though your initial gut reaction was that this person is a little creepy. That’s been my experience, anyway!
@@MAYBEE90 that reminds me exactly of season 2 of You. Delilah gets a creepy vibe from Joe and she's 100% correct but then she ends up trusting him anyway
Had a friend who was a Sociopath. Watching your video confirmed what I had suspected. He was manipulative and lied constantly while remaining charming. He also lacked empathy. One day he cheated me and I called him out on his lie. His denial was so extreme, angry and over the top that I knew something was wrong with him and had to end our friendship. Live and learn.
@@gianthills YES This is the exact danger of such videos. You are correct. Despite some of the accurate information it depicts, it is not productive to put it our there with a close examination about how many, many behaviors can also just be poor choices or bad behavior we all are prone to at times in are lives.
@Jammy Climba Now this is one behavior all psychopaths and sociopaths engage in; they absolutely refuse to be accountable for their part in a problem. They consider it a personal affront to think they might bear some responsibility for a relationship problem. While they do not care about or even empathize with your pain and struggle, they care way too much about their own pain and struggle. For example, they may insist you see a psychiatrist to fix yourself to fix the relationship problems. However, when the psychologists suggest that they need the counseling as well because they are part of the problem and may need to change some of their own perceptions, attitudes, and behaviors to cure and save the relationship they will refuse and be angry and offended because they aren't the one who has a weakness or illness. They don't need to be fixed. You do! And they obstinately coldly maintain that posture no matter how much it hurts their spouse. A true sociopath who is a danger to others presents with all 6 behaviors consistently.
What if someone isn’t nice to you? Do you think they’re hating you? People on the autism spectrum have problems reading others and they’re usually blamed for being “not nice”
@@happyemoji6553 I feel more uncomfortable with someone being too nice than someone being rude with me, someone being rude for no reason often feels more authentic than someone being overly nice, I would think they're just having a bad day or maybe that's how they normally behave
It could definitely be a red flag. I'd say watch out for people who seem "Too good to be true" if they seemingly are so charismatic, go out of their way to be incredibly kind and start love-bombing you that is definitely a field of red flags. But I get what you saying.
you couldn't be more wrong to be very very honest, i wil never give up being nice, to change myself cuz others do have a sick thinking mind, i might be bad cuz i might be 'too' nice...yea ..na just no.
This confirms what I’ve been feeling about a friend of mine. She’s a sociopath! She’s very manipulative, takes advantage of my kindness, but thinks I don’t see it. Everything she does is not out of kindness. It’s to gain something from the person.
@@imcallingjapan2178 You’re right. I can’t medically diagnose anyone. But it doesn’t change the fact that she’s not a great person. It was disappointing.
@@Galactic_Empire_Ruler damn you r correct I also have a so called friend who is the most cunning person in our class and is impulsive, narsistic,gossiper , and stares as if she can kill someone 😑and in my eyes she is harmless cuz I m tryna act close to her and find her weakness.
@@humanz222 both of you should stand some distance. The further you distance yourself the better you see the lies they spew. Stay outside the box they put themselves in. Sometime it's better being the one outside looking in.
@@gititgiitit5450 ikr I don't wanna be see her face but I can't as she is not only my classmate but also my tution mate Yesterday she manipulated the teacher and took away my book from him(which was supposed to be given to me).
My former boss was definitely a sociopath. At first he seemed great and was going around asking about everyone and what the needed. What ended up happening is none of the needs or concerns were met but he remember everything and used it against people to get what he wanted.
@@straykittsco.950 sociopath is under the umbrella of nassisitic anti social disorder. Of course he seemed like one, I only gave you a tiny snippet of his behaviors. I didn't feel the need to mention he exhibited every behavior on this list, seemed redundant.
One fact the "experts" consistently get wrong is the lack of empathy. Sociopaths can compartmentalize who the do and don't feel empathy for. It does however take quite a bit to enter the worthy of empathy category but they can feel and apply empathy. They also consciously recognize that there are those they feel it for and those (the majority) who they don't. They also feel they're smarter than most others...and they usually are.
You are right, Blanquito. But their selections are directly based on their interests. Normal people have the feeling of empathy regardless of the response they can get from others. Sociopaths are always calculating results. Actually, their sense of empathy are always self-centered.
I feel empathy for A VERY select few. There the only safe ones. Everyone one else. Is extremely venerable to my trap. Usually easily set if you trigger it.
Some sociopath "tells" I've noticed are: (1) Switching emotional presentation with zero transition time, i.e. going from bawling meltdown to calm conversation; they're simply trying out what works on you, not actually expressing anything. (2) Yes, sociopaths will stare/maintain eye contact for too long, but also watch WHERE their eyes are looking, and remember WHY: they are busy trying to extract every clue from your face and body language as to how best to manipulate you; "Is what I'm doing working? How should I adjust?". (3) Presenting as having "seen a lot of life"- yet also prone to asking questions about human behavior that might be appropriate for a young child or alien visitor, but not an empathetic and normally socialized adult.
I had a Brother as Sociopath But We got in Fist fight in 2019 were I came in Top. After that I started to stay away from him he is envy and jealous of me.
thank you for this video. I have a neighbor who is a siciopath and tried to lure me into a shipping container to " help" him move some item. I told him " ABSOLUTLEY NOT". He then got very angry and swore and cursed at me. Later on he kept insisting to come over to my home and kept asking if i needed help/ I knew he has ill intent and finally had to text him to never call me again or i would report him to the police. I am gratful for these videos to help reconfirm my intuition and gut feelings .
This is the opening plot to silence of the lambs. Ted Bundy also lured people to helping him by pretending he had a broken arm or whatever. Some years ago, when I was a homeless, a guy we all knew at a shelter had a ryder truck and said one or two of us were welcome to sleep in the back. We noped out of that guy's life. There was a rumor that he was caught downloading some unmentionable porn on his laptop. This was like 15 years ago, I've forgotten some details.
"True value isn't found in wealth, but in the strength of character and depth of wisdom. Women seek a man who can provide emotional security and unwavering confidence."
Interesting, i knew a guy in school who was a diagnosed sociopath but also had aspergers (i also have aspergers) he gave the best advice and actually was aware of his lack of empathy and he would actually tell people who knew him to be aware of his lack of empathy. Infact i still follow some of his advice in dealing with things like rejection, guilt, grief and anger. One of his lines i still use is "there is a thin line between a thick line and no line at all" for him this was to remind himself that some of the things he does will cross the line. But for me i apply it to almost anything. He was one of the only sociopaths ive met who actually used his manipulation skills to help people so they didnt go through what he did. He used to say that his awareness of his issues gave him the ability to understand why people felt the way they do even if he doesn't essentially get the feelings himself
Their failure to understand the negative effect or harm they do by manipulating is chilling. I once dated a sociopath whose response to me discovering they were lying to me about things that were extremely important to me was, "Oh, you figured that out. Oh, well. Want to go get dinner?" At the time, I thought that response was pure evil. It was what brought the relationship to an end. Years later I finally understood that they had no concept that I would feel hurt/betrayed/devastated by their lies. In their twisted way, they actually liked me, which is both why they lied (because they thought the lies would make me happy) and why they offered dinner when I discovered their lies. In their mind, the offer for dinner was an apology or compensation as opposed to cruel insensitivity about how it made me feel. As if they were settling up after losing a bet: "you won, I owe you dinner."
@Cats Pajamas… Indeed sociopaths use good deeds as “get out of jail cards.” The defenders (apologists is a more accurate term) of fired basketball coach Bobby Knight immediately bring up his donating money to the Indiana University library to distract from his misbehavior on his job. A donation to a library is a fine gesture, but its reward is not to be excused from accountability for the donator’s other actions.
@@brianarbenz1329 Oh, there were certainly some errors. Especially run-on sentences. But it's definitely an odd criticism in a social media space, where everything people post is generally a first-draft "stream-of-consciousness". Grammar is the last thing on our minds. Nobody expects to be publishing a book, here.
Things like 10 second stares do give me a gut feeling of uneasiness... Never, and I mean NEVER, ignore your gut feelings. When has your gut ever led you in the wrong direction? If you have a feeling that you should not trust or be alone with someone, Don't brush it aside, No matter the circumstances
Your "gut feeling" can only be trusted ti the extent it is predicated off a healthy psychological base. However, erring on the side of caution in situations of safety to protect yourself is a good idea.
@@t_btayGood one! I met a girl who is always on guard because her gut tells her most people are hostile. Sad. My gut tells me she is cold as ice. But... Now I don't know if I can trust myself. Should just keep addressing the issues I see. Do you keep score with people? Like three insults and you're now an evil person?
Remember that these are all "could be" signs. Just because people show certain "signs" doesn't mean they ARE a sociopath. Remember, do not do ANYTHING that you are not comfortable with, no matter who is asking. Do not give anything that you are not willing to lose. It is always ok to say "no."
Sociopath type people get extremely angry whe you have and impliment firm boundaries because it disables them....and THEN the manipulation begins! My oldest sister is showing signs mentioned in this video, firstly what I have just mentioned about boundaries and also she has no care and empathy but will verbally exclaim how she loves and cares for me and our family, but will deliberately hurt and manipulate if you let her. Her actions are void of care and empathy. My mother had two nervous break downs over the years because of the subtle manipulation we all couldnt understand. My mom found and organisation called TOUGH LOVE in Soth Africa, which helped us and me, learn how to disable the behaviour. This organisation was a God Send. When I impliment boundaries now, she will tell me she is afraid of me, (trying to turn the table - so that she will be perceived as the victim) Thank you for this video. Now I know, after reading all the comments, that I am not immagining things. All the gas lighting can make me doubt myself. I suspect the Socoipath can spot and empath from a f***en mile away.
My mother is a sociopath, I’m still healing from the traumatic effects. I never even knew what to look for but this video is so informative every single trait is spot on, she mirrors them to a tee.
My mother is a sociopath/psychopath as well. It is the scariest occurrence one can have and takes a lifetime to heal. Still on the journey as well. Stay strong
@@djosephine God forbid, I pray it doesn’t take you a lifetime. No one deserves that much work dealing with something they never should have been exposed to. Wishing you strength and clarity.
I can understand why some ppl after traumatic experiences and a subsequent lack of empathy from others after the experience can make you numb to other ppl’s suffering as well.
Yeah, can confirm as someone with CPTSD, especially being raised by two narcissists. I'm 30 and only recently got to the point of being able to effectively empathize with those around me and use that empathy effectively to build them up. And it wasn't even because I didn't want to when I was younger; I was too numb to be bitter or stingy necessarily. I even TRIED all the time to be nice, to help others, to protect them. Though it was probably more an extension of my self-preservation, to make sure people wouldn't hurt me, than true care for them. Or perhaps a mix of the two? Rather, I had never been taught things like kindness (only manners and obedience), which is something you learn by receiving it when you're little. I was barely even aware of it as a concept, not accurately anyway, let alone what it looked like or how to put it into my actions. I was fumbling in the dark without knowing what light even is. So being "kind" never really worked how I wanted it to, and I was too awkward to be charming, so I ended up with even less socialization and affection than I needed, plus more abuse. It's taken me a very, very long time to first just drag myself out of that isolated, lonely pit and then to teach myself how to be a person and function in such a blindingly bright, alien-to-me world. While also cutting out all the awful ideas and tendencies my parents tried to cultivate in me. This channel has honestly helped such a tremendous amount in pointing out things that most find obvious, and how to do better. I am seriously grateful.
@@KooblyK I can only understand empathy when someone gives me direct words of condolences, then I can reciprocate back. If I don't know how someone's pain or struggle feels, I can't feel real empathy necessarily but realize that the person is distressed and needs condoling, then again, this could be normal, I've never analyzed this in depth.
I am always suspicious of people that are too charismatic or over eager to help me. I always suspect they have an agenda to take advantage of me. you can be too nice to be trusted.
The most important sign mentioned also happens to be the first: "it seems to good to be true." There's a reason people think that; it's because it IS too good to be true! I've dealt with a few sociopaths in my life, and every single one started out with that "too good to be true" thought. Two other symptoms I've seen are the excessive/incessant lying, one lie after another, and "doing too many favors" for one person. This is a really great video, btw. Terrific insights into sociopaths and psychopaths.
When they get caught in a lie, they so easily turn it around on you and make you out to be the villain. Which you only ever catch them if you're close enough to them to understand their devious patterns. They can do the absolute worst to you, but when you get upset, you're somehow in the wrong. It's incredible.
Depression can cause you to become distant and think of people to good to be true as well so the first one can be rather complex , you might have decided on the first one because it's the one you know people will relate to the most.
@@jessesinclair3861 you will know if they are lying because they will lie about things you KNOW to be false, but will not stop telling you the lie, until you start to question yourself.
@@jessesinclair3861 not all sociopaths are smilers though. Some are the "strong silent type" but mold themselves easily into social situations. They're very rare.
Learn to say: No! Be brutal about cutting these people from your life. They will make you feel like YOU'RE in the wrong. It's ok, just walk away. Forever.
I just did, i found out a friend i had is a sociopath and i told him straight away, that he is one, and he almost made me believe he is not and i fell again for it. 😅 but no more lol.
Exactly what i did 4 older siblings are frantic now that I'm not around to fix all their breaks and council them. I tried for 35 yrs what a waist of my sanity.😆💪🎸
Or they are dating a woman on the spectrum that still gets childishly overemotional about everything....especially if she is a narcissistic sociopath. Holding grudges, easily offended, screaming and yelling, overly needy. He must bend over backward to make her happy and make sure she is constantly his focus of attention. And men can be the same. They are exhausting and finally breaking away is peace and freedom
I’ve had a couple of docs say I have anti social disorder and did live in manipulative ways for awhile but I became self aware and felt empathy for the people I hurt. Blah blah but basically went through a couple years of self hate and mutilation (intense cutting and unalive attempts) and am getting comfortable being me again. It’s a journey.
The way why mom told me… people are like paper. You use them once and they are done. Gone in the wind. She also referred to me as a book on a shelf she can take down when ever she wants. Now that’s a psycho path narcissist.
This is why I moved and told no one. 42 years is enough. Then I met my ex wife while healing from a hip surgery. She became abusive and I was always falling for these lies because she was all I had. I’m 2.5 years sociopath free and I am happier than I ever thought I could be.
A word of caution: it’s easy for normal people to misunderstand those on the autistic spectrum as having sociopathic traits when really the cause and meaning is quite different. Autistic people do feel empathy and remorse, unlike sociopaths. Though to pass for normal those at the high function end of the autistic spectrum have to learn to act like normal people because they lack understanding of social feedback cues that are natural for most people. Staring, for example. You have to teach an autistic person not to stare.
I'm autistic and had to learn not to stare. I never stared because I was confident or anything. On the contrary I used to sometimes stare or do other things that would be seen as strange because I was socially anxious and was not able to focus on what my face and body were doing or how I looked to other people.
i feel like the main difference is those of us on the autism spectrum have zero desire to manipulate people. More often than not I'm trying to pass as normal and then get away from situations as soon as possible. It almost seems like sociopaths relish the opportunities to be in social situations and play "the game". Probably a good way to differentiate would be to see how interested someone is in being there.
@@crackwitz it’s not that simple. The alternative extreme of avoiding eye contact is nearly as problematic when you’re trying to fit in. It takes practice to get the right amount of staring to convey your internal state properly.
A sociopath might tell you a story about something they did, but say it was someone else just to see your reaction. They get to know you inside and out to better manipulate you. I was with one for 10 years.
My ex used to do this! He told me about his friend who cheated on his girlfriend and was asking if he should still be friends with him and whether I think he still has a chance with his girlfriend. Little did I know he was cheating on me 😅
Hello can you tell me this girl I go on a date with is sociopath. She lie to people that know me that she step on my toe and want my contact to apologize but in reality I never met her before. She lie about someone randomly took a picture of her and told me to make me protect her. When the date was over and I told her I dont want to continue. she flip a switch on me and act very emotionally even a death threat. after that she lie to her my and my friend that I wouldn't let her get her stuff in my room but she never been in my room before. I block her on all social now
My last employer was like this. Asking questions to gain "insider info", also telling story after story after _story_ about how wonderful he is and all his "good deeds" which made me feel pressured to say what a "nice guy" he was but THEN he'd brush off my compliments and say "I didn't tell you that to get a pay on my back 🤪" Yeah. *RIGHT.* That guy talked more about himself than anyone I've ever met! 😂😂😂😂😂 and he also would carelessly insult his 3 daughters and his wife! His sweet wife's mother was really sick and he actually said to me that he thought she'd "kick the bucket" any day now. 😳🤯🤯🤯 So glad to be out of that position. These types are exhausting. He saw me and my people pleasing and codependency issues coming a mile away. 🤦🏻♀️
All of these signs are also signs of addiction. I know about 4 people who were diagnosed as a sociopath but really weren’t. They struggled with addiction which caused them to manipulate their way to get what they want, lie to preserve themselves(and usually become good at lying), and lack of empathy because you don’t care about anything nearly as much as you want to escape through drugs and alcohol.
On personality disorders (PD) and addiction: "The overall prevalence of PD ranges from 10% to 14.8% in the normal population and from 34.8% to 73.0% in patients treated for addictions, with a median of 56.5%"
@@gokurocks9 Yep, seems like It is the way people with ASPD and addict both want things. And they do not give up getting those things. Then you get a similar behaviour so it almost have the same side effects of the diseases, let alone if you already have ASPD and get addicted. Makes it really hard to decide to stop and keep being sober for other people i have to say...
I have a brother-in-law who most people outside the family think that he is an absolutely wonderful man so kind and generous to them but let him get home with his family and it's a totally different story he is mean to them and his children do not like him at all and my sister won't leave him because she's afraid of him.
@@brendasimmons9045 yes! I can well believe this. I say this as someone who while not a sociopath has some tendencies in that direction and more so in the past, but who also has a lot of unstable empathy which I am struggling to improve. I have a lot of regrets over past behavior due to this, and It's something that runs in my family. It's important to realize that even full on sociopaths and narcissists have a lot of trouble with empathy, and may have little, but that doesn't mean they don't have any. They are on the extreme end of a spectrum, which has no clear sharp line. It's easy to label someone as something but the reality is more complex. Many people will have some strong sociopathic tendencies without being full sociopaths, often still having strong but variable empathy but frequently struggling plenty to show it or act accordingly.
@@brendasimmons9045 I noticed this in the workplace more than anywhere else. I am in high level management and everywhere I work there is one or two people causing problems for the entire company by scheming to gain power and influence, subtlety doing things to make other management look bad, and acting like the nicest boy next door who is the number one company team player in front of exec management, and then in private meetings yells and bullies and has their employees all scared to get fired. The crazy thing is that most people don’t notice and actually believe the nice guy routine and believe the act instead of the results of the actions of these people. I’ve seen it at every company I’ve worked for. I can imagine it’s the same in government.
We are called to be discerning spirits. It is impossible to fake genuine love, real concern, and impeccable truth -- no matter how brilliant a sociopathic actor you are! I don't listen to what people say, for words are meaningless. I watch what people do! Actions speak much louder than words!
People should learn to use their intuition more! When I face a problematic situation nowadays, I calm my mind and let the distractions flow away just like in meditation. They teach this method in the military nowadays! In the army you learn that its better to act even if you make the wrong move, compared to be passive and not take any decision and that's were intuition comes in.
^ ^ this !! listen to what they say then OVER TIME watch what they DO!! their words should match up with their actions.. !! and I dont mean they take and extra scoop of ice cream or hav a gossip session about the creepy guy you say bothers you.. but OVER TIME.. it will reveal itself! do they hav inconsistencies almost ALL the time.. ? can you trust them to tell you the Truth? what about when you're not there..? Trust this type of discipline.. and watch if they are Consistent!
Sociopaths come on a spectrum, not everyone is creepy, most are more "normal" than you'd think from watching films. They just have problems with certain human emotions or empathy.
They don't "just" have problems with certain human emotions. They have persistent patterns of violating the rights of others and committing crime. These are criterion you must meet for a diagnosis. You must have caused harm or committed a crime to receive a diagnosis of aspd.
@@e_i_e_i_bro That's not true. Those cases are just the most prevalent, because the average person doesn't need a psychiatric diagnoses for day to day living. Criminals may be forced to receive a diagnoses, while many people who have ASPD will never know or be discovered to have it by others.
@@Bancheis Those cases are prevalent because you need a history of crime or harm to receive a diagnosis. DSM5: "There is a *pervasive pattern* of disregard for and violation of the rights of others occurring since age 15 years. 1. failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are grounds for arrest 2. deceitfulness, as indicated by repeated lying, use of aliases, or conning others for personal profit or pleasure 3. impulsivity or failure to plan ahead 4. irritability and aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults 5. reckless disregard for safety of self or others 6. consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or honor financial obligations 7. lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another. B. The individual is at least age 18 years. C. There is evidence of conduct disorder with onset before age 15 years. D. The occurrence of antisocial behavior is not exclusively during the course of schizophrenia or a manic episode."
My foolproof plan is to treat everybody with suspicion, and to say "no" when someone outside of my inner circle needs a favor. It's OK to come off as cold or rude. It will save your life.
Not really, I get the sense that I was pretty good at manipulating people at a young age but that was overridden by my contempt for weakness so I just stopped trying to make people do my biddings since I didn't want to be around people I thought my actions had made lesser. I still want things my way but I like to think I'm above board at all times presenting my arguments.
It is a terrible thing to go through a toxic sociopathic friendship. I had a friend since first grade, and it took me 30 years to realize this. He caused so much damage, with bad advice and toxic comments. Back then there was very little information on this topic.
Same dude, I don't know if he's a sociopath, however he is a the most Grandiose "I'm always right" manipulative Narc I've ever met. If you don't always agree with him, or call him out in the slightest he'll do anything to make you look or sound wrong, shift blame, attack you verbally, no rules, whatever it takes. Super toxic dude... Adios buddio
I’ve had a friend for about 11 years now whom I KNOW has got to be a sociopath. He’s now just an acquaintance. But yes, sociopaths are created, usually because of parental emotional abuse. It’s a way to protect themselves. They delegate people as objects, and treat people accordingly. When you are of no more use to them, they disappear. If you want to get rid of them, stop giving them any help.
I don't think you can just say that these people are "created". False 'facts' like that really help no-one. The video said it but my experience says otherwise.
I may seem like I don't have emotions sometimes, but I definitely do. It's actually hard work for me to keep my emotions in check, but I do it because I'm a stoic. I still get nervous in interviews and have to remind myself to keep eye contact, repeatedly. I feel guilty for things as small as letting a wrapper blow away in the wind. Sometimes I feel guilty for "letting" something like that happen, even after trying to chase the wrapper down. I get emotionally attached. Both with people and things. I lost my favorite coffee mug at the Denver airport recently and it really upset me internally. I tried not to show that, but I still brought it up to people more than I felt I really should. I know other people don't get quite so attached to inanimate objects lol. As for people, during this same trip, I was OK for about a week before I started missing my kids so much that it started effecting my ability to focus. On the other hand, I'm quite good at temporarily suppressing emotions in an emergency. I go into full blown battle brain mode and think everything through quickly and rationally. When my son squished his fingers in the arm of his grandma's electric wheel chair, my wife and my mom were both panicking, and it was freaking my son out worse than he already was. I went into medic mode and quickly cleaned and dressed the wound, then took him straight to the hospital. Once he was in the care of the doctor I let my defenses down a bit. Of course, when I watched my boy take the stitches without crying or even flinching it made me really proud. Idk if any of that is normal, per se, but it's more about my philosophical worldview than anything.
Thank God I'm able to pick up on that kind of bs a mile away. I pay attention to everything, body language, how you say certain things, the smallest details will tell you everything.
When meeting people for the first time, I never do the wait and see or think maybe I'm being to judgmental or second guess my feelings...I run for the hills. My dad always said, listen to your inner voice because your first reaction is usually the correct one.
So true! How many times did I ignore the red flags and got burned because. I didn't take heed. I'm pretty sure I can discern the tale-tale signs now that I'm much older. Psychopaths and sociopaths often "bait" you with tempting proposals. You don't realize you were set up until it's too late. So, morale of the story: try not to succumb to temptation because there can be far reaching consequences!
I've had to learn that the hard way. Always want to give people the benefit of a doubt. Still have to kick my self to not do that, so have become a recluse so as not to tangle with the wrong people. 😟
Trust your senses. I have encountered many folks exhibiting some of these behaviors who were not sociopaths. A very wise man told me in my youth once "Some people bear watching." Meaning be careful how involved you become with someone until you see their behavior in many circumstances.
I don’t think i’m a sociopath but looking away during conversation makes me lose focus of what they’re saying, so a lot of times I’ll be unwaveringly staring into people’s souls lol
Keeping eye- contact is normally fine and builds a connection with the other person, it's the absent blinking coupled with the staring that are subconsciously perceived as predatory behaviour, because it is. Think about it, if you're aiming for a prey, you don't ever get your eyes off it until you get it.
I've found that some tend to talk like they have too much empathy, when in fact they are very good manipulators. I'm wary of those that become ''quick friends'' as they usually want something from you. I had an ex-friend that did both of these things and 'love bombed' people and then contrived an argument to push them away or just turned cold when they were of no further use. After it happened to me, I became aware of her doing it to others.
One of the wisest thinks my mom ever told me was "beware of someone who says 'I love you' way to soon". The same applies to any kind of indearment or familiarity and those simple words have saved my butt by keeping me away from some toxic people.
I think people avoid me because I come across as "too nice" but it's people pleasing from CSA and I can't stop. It's not just overly smiling and being friendly it's coming on waaay too strong :/ I'm tryna tone it down in therapy tho haha
@@notthingofnote I was like that too but I'm cured now. My give a damn was sergically removed and now I'm free to be the A hole I've always wanted to be🤣👍
These examples are also indicative of a person that has a long term drug and/or alcohol addiction. I had a lot of addictions and I noticed the longer I was addicted the less I cared about others or their misfortunes, it was all about me. I'm normally a very empathic person, to a fault actually, but I definitely think substance abuse can rid u of normal emotions.
Quite right. But how AWFUL you feel when you outgrow that addictiveness and look back on some the stuff you have done - your remorse and guilt certainly show you are NOT actually a sociopath.!!
very good point. i knew a girl like this, her mind and emotions were just wasted by drugs. there is kind of a difference way it presents but still, scary coldness.
Yup. That is because psychopaths are also motivated by one single obsession. Similar to addiction but way worse. If you want to imagine how manipulative a psychopath is, just imagine the worst drug addicted person times like 100. That is how dangerous they are. Everyone has a run in with a few during their lifetime, they say we all are connected through 4 people, meaning someone you know met someone you know met blah blah everyone on earth. So you will run into them. And you will know when you do because all of a sudden, no matter how strong of a person you are, you will find yourself feeling like you are 1 inch tall. Think back to a time when you felt like that, you will remember someone...
People try to convince me that I’m a sociopath due to my PTSD-induced apathy, yet I meet absolutely none of the other criteria or behaviors of actual sociopaths.
I lived with a sociopath.. he was my best friend from school, as we got older he became a really scary guy.. quite skinny and average height but his mind was terrifying. Be careful out there people
What a lot of psychopaths and sociopaths fail to understand is that oftentimes people sense or deduce they are lying or using deceit of some kind - but choose not to confront them with it. They walk off believing they have shined someone on, and all they’ve done is demonstrate what kind of technique they like to use. I think this is why a lot of them come unstuck as they age, or when they’re try it on with an older generation: most people learn from experience. Unlike many sociopaths.
I used to be friends with someone that exhibited every one of these characteristics. He was definitely one of the ones with bad intentions and dealing with him was awful. And once they realize they don’t have you in their corner anymore that’s when things start getting really ugly
@Hueclouds Yes. Not so much overly angry but extremely malicious. For example he put me in a position where I could’ve possibly been responsible for someone’s death/suicide. And he would go and try to turn me against my friends by telling lies between us
Mushrooms did wonders in my life. Over the course of my life, I've suffered from uncontrollable, depression, anxiety, alcohol, smoking, and illicit pills addiction. Imagine carving heavy chains for a long time and then all of a sudden that burden is gone. This is something that really needs to be used globally to help people with similar health challenges. I've been sober for 6 years and have my life back.
To be honest, mushrooms are one of the most amazing things on the planet and it is natural, they serve in many ways not only for mental related issues.
Can you help me with a reliable source? I have suffered from years of addiction, anxiety, and severe ptsd, thinking I got my panic attacks under control, they've come back with a vengeance, and I'm constantly trying to take full breaths but can't. It's absolutely crippling me, I'm in Switzerland and it is hard to get a reliable source here. Really need!
Yes, Sporeville. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD, and addiction... Mushrooms definitely made a huge difference to why I'm clean today.
I wish they were readily available in my place. Microdosing was my next plan of care for my husband. He's 59 & has many mental health issues plus probably CTE & a TBI that left him in a coma 8 days. It's too late now I had to get a TPO as he's 6'6 300+ pound homicidal maniac. He's constantly talking about killing someone. He's violent. Anyone reading this Familiar w/ BPD knows if it is common for an obsession with violence.
When Risky Business director Paul Brickman was introduced to Tom Cruise during casting and shook his hand, he related recoiling inwardly with the thought “This guy is a sociopath.” As we know, TC got the role, but it likely was not a comfortable shoot for his director.
I'm the exact opposite. I have empathy to the point of almost being a pushover. You tell me a sob story and I'll give you money and help in any way I can. I have learned to be more cautious about this now later in life, but I had to learn the hard way. I have been put through the ringer by sociopaths and narcissists. I know I'm partially to blame for putting myself out there, but like I said I don't do it anymore.
I'm not sure if it's a good idea to stop your natural empathy. While a few sociopath might try to exploit you, other genuinely empathetic people will recognize you and become close to you. It's better to suffer a few rip offs rather than behaving like a sociopath yourself (not saying you're doing it, I'm just bringing it to the extreme to make a point). There's being ripped off, and then there's the opportunity cost that you're missing by not expressing your empathy.
Just get to know them longer before giving anything valuable, like money, your trust or any personal information that could be used against you. No one who has empathy themselves will ask for much right in the beginning, and will respect your boundaries.
I can spot a manipulator from miles away. I laugh at how they “think “ through that smirk on their face like they are being devious 😂 Go with your gut and vibes with people it will never steer you wrong .
This is spot on with one of my brothers and my ex GF. They in general seemed to lack Empathy and their responses often were very cold, especially when they were manipulative towards me or others .. interestingly, I could spot their manipulation pretty easily most times but some of them would really catch me by surprise. It's chilling how cold and emotionless these people are at the core and will do anything to achieve what they think is best for them.
They always right and you're ideas are never right, they can't even see your idea as logical, that's what makes them so obvious because the simple answer to them will make no sense and they will often lie to make your idea seem illogical.
I want to know how empathy is turned off in these people? Like it has been weaponized as if a frigid emotionless clone role model was broadcast into the minds of unsuspecting people.
I have encountered two sociopaths in my life time. They both had the stare, this menacing, intense, way too long, trying-to-intimidate-you stare, they told WILD stories about how badass and threatening they were (being chased by cop cars and a helicopter down the highway for fleeing a drug control scene, or having cut marks all over their bodies when being delivered into child psychiatric institutes, or enjoying scaring their mom's new boyfriend by standing beside their bed and rubbing a knife against their own cheeks repeatedly as they woke up, or levering someone's knee cap out of their socket with a knife), they thought they could take on anyone, they had no empathy, they had no clue for how inappropriately violent the things they told were, they had no morals, the others were always to blame (a sociopath always sees himself/herself as the victim and everything gruesome they do is therefore justified), one of them was superficially charming,they were both manipulative (always trying to win you over to their side), they tried to make you feel sorry for them, they would be indifferent to breaking your stuff and feel no remorse, they would offer you things you said you would like to have, they would exert control over you in a weird way (like ignoring you when you say you need to be going and you end up staying much longer than you want, accompanying you when you want to go alone, making you agree with them when you don't, and all on a weird subconscious level meaning it wasn't like they would actively block the door or anything, it subconsciously felt more like you couldn't match their aura and lost a fight in a way, and you stay there and you realize "*somehow* I cannot shake off from this person when I want to go and I end up staying, *somehow* they are in charge, but you can't put your finger on what it is that makes you stay), they want to provoke an emotional reaction out of you (often shock or admiration for how ruthless and bold they were in their story), their stories have plot holes if you listen REALLY REALLY carefully. Both of them were fascinated by me. Both of them wanted to be friends. The creepy thing is they actually do crave human interaction and love (in the form of admiration and obedience though), and they seemed to like me alot. Probably due to the fact that I can be pretty dull and emotionally numb too. I too have experienced trauma that made me almost completely lack empathy in my youth and I'm not like most other people. I'm not easily shocked or threatened or intimidated by these stories. But I'm also a person who isn't out to pick a fight and I really try to understand everyone. I was fascinated by them and wanted to really understand them on a deep level. And they probably liked that. The fact someone doesn't reject you for telling these stories is much likely a rare occurrence to them. And maybe they thought "here's someone who would finally actually *GET* me". I approached them differently than all the other people around me did. Unfortunately for them, (and very fortunately for me probably) they only briefly met and interacted with me over the time of a couple off weeks before they dropped out of school or were fired from my workplace respectively. So I didn't have to interact with them on a long term basis. But the things they told me (some of them in confidence, though it was probably just manipulative false confidence to gain my trust) were pretty personal. One of them told me life had no outlook for himself, he knew he'd end up in prison sooner or later (age 20 at that time), the other actually started to let his real character shine through (make dorky jokes or let it show a little when something someone else did actually hurt his feelings in a way). These are people who experience trauma (abuse, mobbing, insecurity, hostility, hospitality, violence, among other things) which makes them believe society or humanity are actually bad. They basically have the inherent believe that all people are evil and out to hurt them and humankind has wronged them. Sometimes it's understandable. But that shouldn't let you make the mistake of feeling sorry for them or justifying their actions in your own head. They are dangerous. They see people as objects. They don't have any respect for you, your will, your physical or mental well-being. And while they don't usually *intentionally* want to hurt you (unless you are out to mess with them and openly provoke them or seek conflict) they don't really care whether you get hurt in the process of them getting what they want. To them you getting physically or emotionally scarred in that process is like to us if we said "whoops, the bed broke because we jumped on it too hard. But hey, it's just furniture, right? And it's not even *my* bed, so why should I care?" Don't befriend sociopaths. You socially and emotionally gain nothing from it. You just highly increase your risk for emotional and psychological (and sometimes also physical) pain.
Usually I just scroll through long comments but this one ..I didn’t. I’m surprised this comment only has 2 likes (now 3). It deserves more! I like your explanations about your experiences, makes me realize the deeper stuff.
My grandfather went to MIT and I have spent my life in the scientific community. I constantly look at things observationally before jumping to a conclusion - instead using deductive reasoning. I struggle sometimes with misjudgment because I have a scientific heart. One of my earliest memories was of taking a fascinated interest in what became a colony of caterpillars when I learned how to colonize them. I was four years old. I played with the other children to an extent, but regularly abandoned this endeavor in order to work on my caterpillar colony in the back of the playground. I never noticed any other children doing anything like this, but that was probably because I was so absorbed in my project. I would later allegedly be recorded as the highest female IQ (I am androgynous now) in a database for child prodigies nationwide with an IQ of approximately 190. I care about people, though I am also defensive of nonhuman animals and plant-life, sometimes to the point of overzealousness. I have been known to prioritize a flower over a human being and get dirty looks. I believe it's important to keep in mind that scientists have a propensity to be misinterpreted and that many have high empathy, but observation is a key part of analysis.
Years ago an intelligent psychopath - a handsome charming young man and quite educated about art became friends with a whole crowd of art collectors, gallery owners, collectors and their rich friends in New Mexico. Over three years he got a reputation of taking art work around on consignment to show to clients. Also, was a fixture at parties, dated heavily, even friendly enough with some families to babysit their kids. One night he vanished into thin air with half a million in indian relics, art, money he was paid for sales etc. etc. Vanished. No one who knew him will ever get over it.
@@elizabethpiccolo5534 forty years ago - I have no idea. I was living Santa Fe and experienced the shock of those cheated, moved away and never found out.
Sounds exactly like my boss...i thought he was just a narcissist but after watching this things make alot more sense. The amount of manipulation and lack of empathy is astounding. And he is constantly testing everyone to see when they will break or quit. Thanks for the video, at least now i know what im up against
Please quit asap. Whenever a narcissist (especially a sociopath) is identified, the only safe thing to do for your mental health (self esteem, stress level, peace of mind) is to get away from them as quickly as you can. if you can’t quit until you find another job, start looking and keep looking until you find one. i speak from experience. i’m still healing from experiencing a narc boss. We spend too much time at work to be put through that day in day out.
I don’t like bullies. Never had one that I didn’t stand up to. I’ve never had a narcissistic boss until this year. I stood my ground and did the work while subtly calling my boss out on things they did … like yelling. It was always a good shift when she wasn’t there. We all worked. But the second she shows up you have to have a wall up. She does this stare. I never acknowledged it at all. Others would and they’d get yelled at or intimidated when they looked at her. She had no power over me. So after she made it known she didn’t like me and started to retaliate against me by taking away a promotion I choose to put in a HR complaint. Then I put in my two weeks. She won and got what she wanted. But no one has ever stood up to her the way I did. I won because there’s no way she didn’t read my HR complaint or my exit survey word for word. Quit your job and find another one please. While I might have stood my ground I felt as if was spiritually and mentally fighting bad spirits/negative forces.
My own son is a sociopath and I'm pretty sure he's always been. He never seemed to have any empathy toward me or anyone and he is extremely manipulative. His dad was the same way. My son has always been good looking and was able to manipulate girls to buy him things. He was interesting and charming to them. As a matter of fact, he was able to manipulate a much older woman into marrying him. She had an expensive home in Miami and other properties. When they got married, my son sold the house and properties and netted one million dollars all the while keeping a mistress. I have no idea what my son is doing now but it makes me sick knowing how he is. We haven't had a relationship in years and I intend to keep it that way.
It is so sad. I know what what you are going through. I hate the result of the fall of man and creation. These biological robots are dangerous. It is ok to keep them out of your life. It doesn't mean you don't love them and wish the best for them, but to be around them will destroy you.
I have known a few Sociopaths. They did not come across as cold or manipulative because they had learned how to mask. One was more introverted and quiet, the other was an extroverted Ex-cheerleader. They both seemed like happy confident relaxed people due to a lack of guilt/remorse or concern. It was only after knowing them for awhile that they accidentally told on themselves. Whether someone is a Sociopath, or not, the only way to protect yourself is to have strong boundaries.
yes, it is really hard to tell right away. although sometimes you can get vibes. i've learned a lot over the years. one big red flag is if they only talk about themselves and show little to no interest to you or your life. or if they do at first but quickly lose interest. they also are really poorly emotionally regulated. their emotional reactions are really off or seemed forced. that's another red flag. they had trouble faking that in an authentic way.
Millon referred to sociopaths as "independent" personalities. As such they are often very successful in organizations and business environments where their ability to react situationally and do whatever it takes to achieve their aims gives them a competitive edge. They can throw you under the bus and never skip a beat. The other thing I would add is that sociopaths never take responsibility for bad outcomes.
It's true if i dedicate myself to a specific goal I will stop at nothing to reach it. On the same note, If I do end up failing at reaching that goal, the following spiral can be dangerous. For instance, I did everything I could to get into the army coming out of highschool. I made it. Basic Training, AIT, Bada bing bada boom right into a honorable medical discharge involving a corneal ecstasia in my left eye. Rip. It cost me my relationship at the time cause i became exceptionally distant and no longer was interested in most going on around me. The boredom was unbearable. It took me 2 years to snap out of that spiral and by then I was homeless, no job, living off of ebt and sleeping under bridges. lol
Oh dude, I know very well when I meet a sociopath, I’ve met too many, and I do get the biggest sense of dread! Because they immediately want to prey on me, but they also feel something is off (the fact that I know what they are about to do), so they do get nervous and aggressive about it.