Jerry and Linda..."You hit a HOME RUN with this interview with Kim. Fascinating comments as many singles can relate to Kim's experiences. I retired and came here (by accident...long story) as a single 20 yrs ago and LOVE it here. I have many single and couple friends and have embraced the Village's lifestyle. I've extended myself over the years in joining groups and making the effort to socialize and form close friendships. I'm blessed to have many friends who "are there for me as I am for them" if a problem should arise. Kim is fortunate to be a great communicator, beautiful and has a great smile. She's solid in her character. Again, fantastic show and may I suggest that you continue to have Kim on periodically to share her opinions, experiences and suggestions on being single in the Villages. God bless you both for your efforts in making the Villages such a special place to live.
This is a really powerful episode. It's really a whole new type of discussion that I haven't seen before on this channel, and the difficult emotions and circumstances she's talking about must resonate with a lot of single people.
Nice woman. Very articulate. I admire that she can explain the pain of feeling alone sometimes, but she doesn't whine or beat her breast. I find her inspiring. What a nice guest interview.
Jerry and Linda, thank you for airing this show. I'm single and I AM moving to The Villages, and the scenario she gave about being alone in a crowd of people is so true. Still can't wait to see you when I get there. 😍
When this video started, I thought, oh wow! Never looked at this side of retirement, especiallly in the Villages. Real eye opener. It was refreshing to get another perspective about the Villages. God bless this woman for sharing and making known the needs of the singles.
The Singles in The Villages club has a compassionate care volunteer group. Connecting with others helps when it comes to situations like getting sick. Being proactive and finding out what resources are available ahead of time helps singles to deal with the fear of "if the worse were to happen". I was faced with hard decisions in January upon learning I had to go to NYC for a major, dangerous surgery. Don't wait until you have to reach out--find out what resources are available so you are ready if the time ever comes.
I am in the exact same situation as this lovely lady! I turned 61 in February and I can really relate to her situation and am really struggling at the moment. My husband passed away 9 years ago and I’m very independent but everyone is attached and I am the third wheel. I walk most days and brunch with gal pals regularly but retirement isn’t what I imagined it would be.
Youre not in the same situation. You are a widow..and its only been 9 years for you. She's been single from divorce for the last 18 years.....Her situation is self imposed. Yours is not.
The most alone I have felt here in The Villages was when I was going under anesthesia at the Doctors office and needed someone to drive me home! “I am really alone! 😮” Called my church though and a lovely fellow member was able to help. But, it was a real eye opener.
@@jthooper1963 hello again. Start looking at your food and the chemicals in them. Food is so different now. Apertame makes me ill; as well as any other of the sugar substitutes. I thought I was so sick for three days: it was the low sugar yogurt (chemical crap!) with sucrose or whatever. Read labels. Feel better.
Kim is lovely. I'm glad to hear she keeps active. I've been single for many years and for the most part enjoy my alone time. That being said it is hard when there's a couples event and I'm by myself. It's also hard when I'm not feeling well and I still have to take care of things by myself. I understand where she's at and what she's saying. Thank you Jerry and Linda for having her as a guest and giving Kim the opportunity to share her views about being single in the Villages. I will say to her to remember it's better to be single and take care of things the way you want them to run rather than to be in a bad marriage or unfavorable relationship. Focus on your blessings and stay awesome.
I felt bad hearing about here challenges with the residents. I think she is a very brave woman to share her story. I wish her much happiness and to stay as healthy as possible. ❤️
The things she is describing occurs EVERYWHERE. It's not the Villages....her best chance of making friends is at the Villages. She tried going back home and didn't like that either. Not really understanding why she came back to TV if she didn't like it the first time. SMH Very negative interview (not yalls fault tho) You need to do a little more searching for someone that's happy, single and lives the tv!!! I've met many!
She’s very correct. This is a couples world. It’s good to remember, sadly we all end up alone. Be kind to and don’t ignore your single friends. She’s hit the nail on the head throughout. I found women were very threatened by me as a single young or middle aged woman. I’m very independent and have come to accept my aloneness, not loneliness, and enjoy my own company. I travel alone. If I was afraid to do that, I’d miss so many things. I meet people. I have a wit about me and talk with strangers. You say don’t think about it when they exclude singles. I say it’s thoughtless. I can tell you from experience, when singles are excluded most often it’s intentional, not an oversight.
I couldn’t disagree more with what Kim is saying. What you get back is a reflection of what you put out….. I’ve had wonderful experiences here with people, both marrieds and singles. BTW-- I am single. We are treated differently, but so what. Deal with it. Find the gift. Not everyone is going to like me; everyone has their own baggage. Not my problem. To thy own self be true. Complaining doesn’t fix the problem; it just makes it worse.
Kim, keep at it and stay busy. I will be 69 in April, I was married for 23 years and divorced since 2005. I was a little hesitant to do things on my own, but that was changed by and older lady. I had went to The USA Airforce Museum and was on a bus to see the Memphis Bell during its restoration. We started talking since we were both there alone. She told me if she waited for someone to do things with all the time, she probably would never go anywhere. And I told her thats the way I felt. You have to drive your own bus. You go girl.
I can’t see making single couples quit or not be allowed in a singles club… suppose they met in that club … they still want to be involved .. I don’t get it. Seems a bit demanding
Was a solo traveler on the cruise with Jerry and Linda a few weeks ago. Jerry and Linda, and all the other guests worked very hard to make me feel welcome and included. So thankful for their kindness!!! Kay
I wish I had found out about the cruise so I could be with other people closer to my age. Do you think that they will do it again. I used to cruise once a year to different places. Maybe they only invite residents of the Villages.
Excellent interview ! I’m retired, 60 yr old single male. Will be renting come Sept-Dec, to get a much ‘better feel’ for The Villages. Previously, I have experienced two Lifestyle visits. I’m sold on the active lifestyle the Villages does offer. Kim, has addressed / confirmed, the many concerns, I find myself, still thinking about prior to my arrival. Kim, Thank you for sharing and wishing you all the best !
Jerry, renting for several months is a good idea, and you should get a really good feeling for TV. I'm a single guy, early 60s, and have been here a little over a year. i absolutely love it here - and have found it very easy to meet friends, even as a single person. I hope you get out an expose yourself to as a many clubs, activities, social events as possible during your stay.
@@Jerry-oj6zmMichael could be the guest Jerry & Linda interviewed twice when he first bought a patio villa in the Village of Richmond that was surrounded by rentals. Then he was interviewed several months later after decorating his home & meeting more friends and getting involved in several activities.
Hello there Kim! We are here near Fenney and so appreciate your feelings. Please, Jerry and Linda, give her our contact information. Kim, we are having a golf cart parade on March 24th in the Fenney, McClure, DeSoto area. Please contact us for information. Don't quit. There are people out there that want to connect. You're vibrant, and your energy will attract more energy!🤗
What a fantastic show! I do appreciate her honesty and realistic views about being truly single. I am also truly single (not dating) and live in Ohio. No matter where we are, yes, it's really not easy facing the fact that you're going to be doing a lot of things alone. You get used to it, and I can call friends to join me for things, but I'm trying to embrace going out to eat alone, traveling alone, even camping alone... and you have to be tough, like she said. I do think it gets easier as we get older to do things alone, but in the back of your mind is, if something happens, what do I do? I just really appreciated her views, her attitude and her honesty!!
This is really a great video.. I’ve been single for over 20 yrs.. I agree it is hard..I haven’t been on vacation for many yrs, three years ago I decided if I wanted to Go on vacation I had to Do this by myself.. sooo three years ago I started coming down to the villages.. I truly enjoy it and have been embraced by so many people, but it is hard if you want to go Out at night.. I do go to the squares but it is usually when someone comes down to visit me.. this year I will leave my comfort zone and go to the square at night alone.. if this lady wants to meet up when I’m down there I will be there starting April 1st..
Kim made fantastic points and I agree about a lot of it. My closest friends are mostly married and don't make things awkward, but I feel like a lot of couple feel awkward and don't know what to do with us. They think about balance and couples like themselves and don't want a "spare" person at their dinner party. I'm absolutely fine being single, but I swear some people seem to feel embarrassed on my behalf. Why? I'm not! One of my single friends and I always look out for one another because we know it's hard when you have things that can't be done by single people. As a single person, I can't even get a colonoscopy without having someone I know come and pick me up afterwards because of the anesthesia. I can't stay there and I can't get a cab/Uber home. Being single never feels like a hardship for me until I realize I can't even get a necessary medical test on my own. She and I buddy up and offer things like rides to the doctor. I came over and helped her take care of her pets when she had foot surgery and was bedridden for a week. We need friendships like that, but it's certainly going to be harder to find those kinds of friends when "Singles" groups allow unmarried couples who don't have to think about things like that.
She was very brutally honest and I like that. Not everything can be roses for everyone. She tried she really did, unlike the couple you have talked about before that didn't even try and moved. I'm so glad you did this show. Thank her for all of us.
Jerry and Linda, thank you for approaching this subject. Like Kim I have been single for many years and am contemplating a move to the Villiages. This probably won't be one of your most watched videos, but certainly targeted a population of retirees or soon to be retirees that are seldom the focus. Thank you Kim for sharing what others of us are thinking. C.
I think it will be very helpful if Linda & Jerry do an updated "Being Single in The Villages". I found the one from 4 years ago to be very helpful prior to moving to The Villages this past September. It prompted me to research singles' clubs and consider all of the different activities and events while waiting to close on my house and move here. Their video and the research into singles' clubs gave me a head start once moved in. I respect and understand the concerns expressed in the video, yet my experience as a single person here has only been positive. I am a 63 years young woman, have been single for several years, retired for several years, have two grown sons living a distance away. In fact, I also lived in this area, moved back to be closer to family in PA, then came back in September 2023. Yet, I do not agree with not recommending moving here for single women under the age of 65. I highly recommend moving here and celebrating life as a single person. Whether you enjoy staying home or going out every night, there are others here who are happy to get together and enjoy that time with you. I hope your viewers keep an open mind and consider that there are single women here under the age of 65 who are very happy to be here.
Glad to hear you are happy here - I am a single guy under 65, and have never been happier or more content in my life as I am now here in The Villages - I have more friends than I can spend time with in any given week. There is so much positivity and energy with most people I meet. Retirement in The Villages is the best!
She mentioned a fair amount of singles she knows that feel the same way. Perhaps that same group could be a support to each other. I've been in the Villages 6 months as a single and have had a different experience. I have a close support group of 4-8 people and we help each other out.
Thanks for the video! Your guest was both articulate and insightful. I'm a single senior, and I love it. But I'm more of a loner, so it works well for me. I hope she tries out for the dragon boat teams because that will give her another way to feel included.
Lost my wife 13 years it’s still hard on me. The VA is trying very hard working on my social life. I joined the singles club haven’t used it yet, working on it.
She is right on the money. What she said is so true. Married women see you as a threat. Which is so funny because you probably wouldn’t want their man under any circumstance. It is better to be on your own than to be with someone and be alone.
Debbie downer. I see why she has problems. I am single in The Villages. I love The Villages. All my neighbors are wonderful. We help each other and we always have someone to talk with.
I live in a Active Adult Community in California. I am 60 and probably the 3rd or 4th youngest person in the community of 1700 residents. I am a widower and I am not invited to socialize with people that are coupled up. All of the single women are at least 75, and only socialize with the other single women. They have no intention of going on a date with any man. They have already decided that they have alreeady had "The love of their life". They are not interested in anyone else. I work from home most days. Being alone 4 or 5 days a week, takes a toll, and makes depression worse. I am seriously considering moving to the Villages once I retire in 2030, but I expect that the same problems are going to exist in all of the Active Adult Communities around the country. I really enjoyed Kim's willingness to mention all of the scenarios. I can totally relate to so many things that she mentioned. Jerry and Linda I really enjoyed ths personal interview. I hope that you have more of these types of videos with both singles and couples. I am interested in seeing the different perspectives, and what things they wouold mention when you asked them about what they consider a Pro and a Con about the Villages and their social experiences. Thank you so much Jerry and Linda.
Please consider moving sooner than later. Florida and The Villages are great in comparison to California. Keep watching Jerry and Linda, they are wonderful.
I'm a single woman living in the Portland OR area. This gal is totally on point. The worst part is my own family members. They will go out to dinner, wine tasting, etc.. As couples. And I rarely see my siblings, because they have their own children and grandchildren. I am considered an "extended" family member. Invited for get togethers on holidays. It is what it is. 🙃
What a fantastic show!! Your guest brought up a lot of issues I never even thought about. She was so articulate. So sincere. It was great to hear her perspective. I know I plan to make some adjustments to how I include singles even more than I thought I was already doing.
I agree completely about not having a “back-up” if I get sick. This is why I stay in my community and have lived in MI my entire life. I don’t like the winters, but sacrifice that by being near family and friends. I remain active by going to silver sneakers three mornings per week, play mahjong, attend Bible studies and go to lunch/dinner, plays and movies with friends.
It is good to hear someone's perspective, whether single or in a couple. EVERYONE has difficulties and positive attributes to their way of life. When listening to someone else's perspective, it opens the mind beyond one's own thinking, or at least it should. I am coming down with my 90 year old mother who has lived with this single lady (always single) for the last 11 years. I know one day she will be gone and I will be on my own again. I am strong of character, but, alone is alone. I will do my best to fit in and to have a wonderful life as it is in The Villages!!!!
Are there no singles -only groups and activities? I can relate but I’m married and my spouse does not like doing anything… so I end up alone 90% of the time. So I definitely do not fit in !! I’m a “married single” 😢
Yep, so use to it... Doesn't bother me, in the least... Rather hang out, and spend my time and money on a single beautiful young blonde lady... Something, I can get into... Subbed, and always a thumbs up : )
Kim, I hope you find some happiness; You come across as sad and needy and that no one cares. You're not stuck. Why limit yourself to the 55-64 group? Don't discount the older ladies, you might surprise yourself and find a true friend.
A very interesting show. We got to see her experience as a resident that we haven't see yet. I'm sure she is well on her way to having many friends to share things with. Thank you for doing this show and I thank her for putting herself out there and sharing.
I enjoyed this show very much. Thank you for such an honest perspective of the challenges singles face. You both have big hearts and care for others. Your guest was very articulate! Great interview!
Thank you for having a single lady. Seriously considering buying in the villages. Couples are great, but being alone is totally different. Thank you! You both are the best!
Thank you for sharing these struggles. I really haven't thought about that perspective so deeply before. Even though I don't live in TV, I could be more inclusive and understanding of the single ladies in my circle. Thank you for opening my eyes!
This episode is one of the best I’ve watched, so substantial, real and I admire her candidness talking about her experiences as a single person and I agree with Jerry this wonderful woman is going to have to hide once in awhile to get away from all the friends and invitations that’s going to come her way after this episode. lol
Linda & Jerry, this was one of your best interviews yet. Kim, your candor, perspective & insights on being single in The Villages were much appreciated. I hope you get on the dragonboat team & are able to resume golfing in the future.
God Bless you, Kim! Fellow PA gal, here. We're in Southern York County & looking forward to our move to TV in 2 years. We started visiting there in 2019, bought a home in 2021 (rented until our move) & continue to visit each November. I'm so ready & can't wait to get there but have to admit it's scary. I've never lived anywhere but where I am. Plan is for me to move down the year b4 hubby to get the house ready & find employment. He can retire b4 me. I won't fit in with the singles or the couples. Thanks so much for sharing!!
Your video with Mike and how he adjusted to TV was more interesting and informative. It might be Vicki's attitude/demeanor that makes her a bit unapproachable. She mentions a fair amount of negative experiences in TV. I want to think there is more to it.
If I was a licensed (whatever) and knew that I could not practice in TV or Florida did not check to find out if I could practice before moving that is a major problem. Change careers good but tough at 60ish as she mentioned. Something and I can't put my finger on it is just not sitting right. Trust your gut always. Perhaps not a popular response, but it is how I feel after watching this.
This was a great video for me!!! I have been a widower since 2010. I live around quite lot of married couples with children. I am not directly involved in their activities. It is difficult and I understand what she was saying internally. I have dated a few women, but the relationship did not last I was happily married for 35 years, I am extremely active but like to have, a woman with similar interest. I do not live in the villages at present, but would like to send my information to the lady in the video at the present., I would like to talk to her by email and hopefully I will move to the villages someday. See when I get there. Finally I just want to remind you who I am. I am a retired, registered nurse, who met you and took you out to dinner.
I lost my wife August 2010 after 40 years of marriage and to me it was like yesterday, I live in The Villages for the last 2 years and at times it tough being a single I really don’t cook much so I go out to eat most of the time and to see all the tables full of couples or friends can be hard at times. I myself not looking for a relationship, I am a golfer looking for a golf group to join. I’m a 100% disabled combat veteran largely do to PTSD i had a wife that understood my problems and helped me through them not having her now worries me about control so I stay to myself more afraid of what I would do if a altercation would happen. Sorry for your loss, have a great day.
My Grandma, a widow, lived in a 55+ in Ft Myers in the 80s and 90s. Despite all of the couples, she managed to find a wonderful group of friends also mostly widowed, who had a lot in common with her. They formed their own EGA group and met once a week for lunch and stitching. My grandma was never lonely, she enjoyed her solitude and her routine. She traveled a lot too. Went on cruises, even by herself. I hope to be as independent as she if something should happen to my husband.
My daughters and I moved to FL 14 yrs ago. They are into Ballroom and Square Dancing and Salsa. Back in our home state of Ky...we would go to a monthly dance and even though there were couples there...a wife would allow her husband to dance with my daughters....and it was most generous. Here in Florida...the wives are NOT AS GENEROUS. They hang onto their MAN..Like the country music song goes...and any female...of any age is considered a threat!!] IT is almost like being back in high school. We..my daughters and I open our home and our hearts..to ALL people...AS we build community here. Best wishes...and PEACE ON THE JOURNEY!!
Wow! This is exactly how I feel. It's hard for folks not in this situation to understand and I know it sounds like we just need to get out there and meet people and stop hiding in our home. But it's not that easy when you are by yourself. Yes, I feel alone even though I live here with all of these great people in The Villages. I am not a loner or a wallflower and can strike up a conversation with anyone. But it's hard not having a significant other and/or a support system to go and do something with - knowing that you have to go out there by yourself again and again. It's one thing to chit chat and another to form a support system where you can go out and do things on a regular basis. I retired from Ohio in 2021 and moved to Ft. Myers at age 61. It was supposed to be with a relative, something we'd planned for years, but they got sick and passed away and without a plan B, I came on down to Florida alone. After Hurricane Ian and an F3 tornado, I decided to move here because I had been watching your videos since before I retired. Plus, I was tired of living in an apt down there where everyone got up and went to work and I sat at home. Thought coming here, I would have people to do things with and many activities. Think I forgot that when you never marry, don't have a lot of relatives, and work for 46yrs, your co-workers become your family and your support system. Retiring and moving away means you lose your support system - and, if you were a workaholic, you have to figure out how to fill your days. I thought that would be easy, couldn't wait to retire. Then, twice in the last year, I've had some rare illness and yes, it's very scary living alone with no support system/family, trying to figure out how to get to the doctor and get meds, and groceries, etc. I love to meet a great guy, but more importantly, I'd like to have a support system of friends that I can do things with on a regular basis. As soon as I feel better, I'm going to try again to get involved with some groups, there is a neighborhood group here where I'm renting my home (long term) down south of 44, that would be a start, they are very nice and welcoming. I've lived in 5 different states in the past and have never had any problems making friends, but then I met people through work. Thank you, Jerry and Linda, for having this guest on - I know there are many of us who are single and don't see any family or friends (mine are still working up north lol), on a regular basis, so we have to start over - this time without work as the glue.
Being single is tough anywhere. I am not in the Villages but I live on the East coast and all my family is on the West coast...Even in church bible studies it's like this. I just get up and do things. She did say it right as I get older and no family around what if something happens?.
I don’t live in the Villages but do live in a 55+ Community in Ocala and I agree with everything she said. I too am single. One thing she didn’t mention was people feeling more free to ask single people personal questions…just like you did. 😎. You asked her if she had ever been married. Would you ever ask a married person if they had been divorced before or if their current marriage is their first? I doubt it. So I have never understood why people ask that and what possible difference it makes.
Your show usually leaves me feeling upbeat and excited about my move TV. Today’s video was quite disheartening. I am a 56-year-old single female, who just purchased a home in Lake Denham. I’ll be down for a week at the end of March, and I was really hoping to begin to make some connections.
My cousin is single, still working and lives there and she loves it! She's never mentioned feeling left out. I see pics of her on fb surrounded by a large group of women pretty frequently. I hope you find some great friends quickly! ❤
I'm a 59-year-old single male and I'm with you on how this video makes me feel but.....I can sit here in the town I live in and do absolutely nothing 90% of the time or move to The Villages where there are a plethora of PEOPLE and ACTIVITIES for singles. I'm not going to let her make me second guess putting my home on the market and hopefully make The Villages my home by this summer. You are making the right decision and it will be great for you! Best of Luck!
Wow, Jerry & Linda, what a terrific guest! She was so honest, but feel sorry she hasn’t been accepted. Keeping busy, volunteering or a part time job might help. Also getting a pet might help a lot! Sorry she is having trouble in TV where everyone seems so friendly & welcoming. Really hope your show helps her find a great companion. 😢
After watching as much of this video I could stomach I realized this woman never seemed to accept responsibility for what happened to her. Political activist do tend to turn me off and would not want one as a neighbor. Too bad you didn’t have a better example of single in the villages.
While I do agree about some of what you said, I love the different perspectives. It is always good to see! You can still learn from people you disagree with.
Wow this was such a great video........I could see this happening to a lot if singles.Good to show the non cookie cutter side of the Villages......Wish her the best just surprised she made her way back to the same situation.
What a great video and I am single with no back up too and am working until September this year, I agree it's hard to be alone and who do you call if you need anything, I am also learning to do things by myself and hopefully things will be better when I retire, time will tell
Some advice for her: Don't look to make friends with the married men. It's a waste of time. It comes across as rude, to say the least. If you do chat with a married couple, make more eye contact with the woman, rather than the man, so you don't make everyone uncomfortable. And you could extend friendship to a wife of a married couple, like a coffee date every couple of weeks or so. Be honest and ask yourself what you're looking for. We have some aggressive females on our street, both married and single. It's gotten so out of hand that we make no bones about crossing the street when we see one of them coming, because they've been rude. We're too old to take any more crap.
This is hard to hear because I am 65 year old considering a move to the villages. I’m aware that being single is tuff but I’m hoping that I can find different club interests that I can join and will feel included. Good luck to her.
As always I enjoy and appreciate your program; however, as an older widow, and a retired mental health professional I would just say you always take yourself with you, it’s the one variable that never changes. The Villages is no different than any other community, being new anywhere is a challenge, So many of the comments below are full of helpful suggestions, volunteering, having parties or get together in your home where you invite both singles and couples, church activities, clubs, the list goes on. Embracing your aloneness in a positive way………..Hope it works out for your guest.
