its 4am and you’re still awake. 

Listen to this video on 🎶Spotify - sptfy.com/P7Fr Listen Now on 🍏Apple Music - Link In Description

This sound is amazing. Whoever is reading this comment, I wish you success, health, love and happiness

Reminds me of the first line of my first novel... "Had you asked me then why I loved the night, I wouldn't have known how to answer. Now, though, I know what I'd tell you verbatim: It's the silence, the solitude, and the fact that when I'm walking the streets at night with nothing but the starlit sky above and my own thoughts to keep me company, I feel at peace. That's not to say I don't enjoy the day; after all, one can't exist without the other. For me, though, the best thing about daytime is the anticipation of night-time's dark, inevitable embrace." EDIT: A few people have asked if it's published. Yes, it's called As Dusk Falls by Matthew Flood. Thanks for all the nice replies

Lets be real here,we dont go to sleep is not bc we cant,its bc we feel free at the night,its so silent,your alone,no sirens,no screaming,just you,alone,free

i feel so alone and it hurts me, but yet i enjoy being alone. not having to worry about how others feel, just you.

3:50am drinking a decaf coffee while smoking a spliff, one day I’ll cease to exist, imagine that

I’m sitting on my bed with a bowl of ramen and a glass of orange juice, still awake at 4:56am, on February 18. My eyes sort of burn but I’m alright. It’s cold outside and I feel comfy in my blankets. Life’s about to open up more to me I’m still young and have a whole life ahead of me. I have no have worries right now. I feel free. I hope you find peace.

Ever since I turned 18, I started using these kind of music genres as a coping mechanism for whenever im depressed or going through rough times, lately I have been majorly depressed and going through rough times, everything will be okay I just dont know how long im going to last. Just know that everyone loves you if you're going through shit times as well, dont hide it, show it, people will be more than glad to help you if you need it.

Seeing people similar to me in the comments is all the human interaction I need right now, thank you guys

15/03/2024 00:46 It's late and I can't sleep and it's cold outside but I'm warm inside my blanket. My days are getting longer and more boring, I don't have anyone to talk to at school, I'm doing very badly, especially in maths, I don't understand anything. I'm afraid for my future, I don't know what I want to do or what I want to become, but one thing is certain: I just want peace and being close to God. I don't know who you are or where you are from, I hope you are healthy, doing well and remember to love yourself sweetheart. 💋❤️

ive been trying to find a playlist that give me this feeling and eventually i found this playlist and its perfect. this is absolutely lovely. thank you from the botttom of my heart

It’s 3:58am right now and no one can stop me from listening to this playlist.

I often contemplate what people are doing at this exact moment, others, outside of my perception. So many people living and breathing at the same time as I-right in this moment. And you, somewhere, are reading the words I’ve written, we’re connected for this brief moment. You’re here. I’m here. Look up at the moon-I’m looking with you, yes, the person writing this comment. And in this very moment-a moment where you’re reading my words, ever so briefly on a screen-you are thinking of me, and in another moment, I’ll be thinking of you, and I’ll be wondering just how many have read my comment here, passed by it, read it carefully, decided to like it, decided to skip over it, decided to reply to it-I’ll be thinking how many eyes read my words that I’ll now leave here. And in this moment I’ll be thinking-of you.

Man those SHEIN ads know how to ruin my mood

2:47 AM here, drinking tea and having a nice time while everyone else in the building are sleep. This is nice.

I'm 38. Normal as normal can be i guess. 6 months sober. But I'm still lost. I had lots of friends and a family at one point but I closed myself off and pushed everyone away. I literally don't have one person I text or talk to anymore. It's time to get back to my Normal life but it seems like a monumental task. I just feel alone and I guess sending this out gives me the illusion I spoke to someone. Thanks for listening.

4:15 am for me Monday August 19th. I've been sad... I just want to make my parents proud and I feel like I'm just rotting away. I want to make my parents happy but at this point I don't know what that is. I've crashed 2 of their cars, I crashed my own car. I keep making mistakes, stupid, stupid mistakes. im sorry mom, dad, i love you guys so much

4:01 AM right now. Let's see what happens with this playlist shall we?

found this at 2:04 am, and at this point I feel like the only reason why I haven’t gone to sleep yet is that I want to spend more alone time, im always interacting w people..at school for example, I don’t get bugged by anyone and stuff just to much people are around me and it annoys me a lot. People running threw the hallways and accidentally bumping into u or everybody talking in the classroom..it just really stresses me out, and going back home in the metro where everybody is pushing each other.. anyways idk why im even saying all of this since after all I have to wake up at 6am and keep on working my ass off so I can have a bright future 😵

i don't want to think deeply about anything because when i do i start to feel depressed and too aware of myself and who i am, i like thinking about nothing because its only then that i can focus on what is infront of me without reminiscing about the past or doubting myself and the changes i endure. thinking about nothing is bliss but is also a waste of time because i feel as if im missing out on something important and not being an interesting and unique person that isn't shallow. the night is calm and stress ceases to exist. i am happy.

these videos always find me,, i rarely click them,, rarely,, but when i do, i spend a good time reading what you all have/had to say… i hear you, i see you… i. see. you.

I have to go to school in the bit. I'm just here listening to this, it's so peaceful. It makes all my troubles go away. School is rough for me. I don't have many friends and I'm a quiet person but listening to music like this helps me realize there is beauty in this world.

I just want to say, this comment section is full of people that use this to heal from old wounds, to cope with hard times And to reminisce about times past. I may never meet you. i may never lay eyes on the individual beauty that makes you unique, but i hope all that see this success, health and love. I always thought i was alone in my struggles, yet so many people are fighting hard everyday. Keep fighting, keep bettering yourself, keep spreading love. Even when you can’t do nothing, and there’s nothing you can do- Do what you can. And that should be enough 🤍. I wish you all strength and fortitude.

I don’t know why I feel compelled to comment. It is three minutes to four am. I miss him, he’s a 16 minute drive from me, asleep, and I wish I was next to him. I love him. I hope he wants to marry me as much as I want to marry him. I’m happy he’s in my life.

About to be 20 on the 30th. I often wonder what went wrong. In middleschool i wished for it to be over, to be older and to be free. I was never the popular kid, i was often approached, though i wasted my school years being quiet due to overthinking about how others will judge me. I know i still have time, but its sad to know i wasted such crucial moments in my life due to being scared. Ive lost all my friends and now my girlfriend. Although i feel lost. I feel a wave of importance in my life, this is where i can start over. Make new friends. Find something im into. Ive never had a hard time having others want to talk to me. Ive just been scared to open up and let people get close. I hope one day i can make it in life and teach my future kid to be better then how i was...

❤‍🔥You are worthy of love and happiness. ❤‍🔥

Tell me why it’s exactly 4am and I’m seeing this video

I’m 17 and sleep is really difficult for me. I spend my days worrying and when I try to sleep I feel like I’m wasting time. Wasting time I could be using trying to understand myself. Wasting time that I feel like I don’t have. This video is exactly how it feels. I just hope someday everything will become quieter.

So much to say. Yet I can't find the mere describable words to perfectly encapsulate what i feel right now.

City sounds and sirens can become the sounds of the cosmos, starstuff, with new thinking. Perception and point-of-view are so sublime.

Сейчас новый год.. 2:54 я сижу в слезах, одна. Пересмотрела всех любимых блогеров, поздравляющих всех.. Я в тёмной комнате с нулёвым настроением, за окном салюты.. в полном одиночестве.🎉

it’s 3:19 am, i feel like i got nobody. i don’t speak to anyone anymore and i miss the sense of closeness. i used to have someone to talk to all the time and rant to and just be my other half, now i have no one. i like being alone, but sometimes im just too overwhelmed about it considering i have no one to talk to. just me surrounded by my own thoughts and accomplishments.

I opened youtube at exactly 4:05AM and this was the first thing in my feed.... ...it may sound weird, but I needed this.. ...thank you...

I wanted to write something so I came up with this: "As the night grew in and day seemed to grow ever closer. I wondered to myself how the night sky could look so beautiful. The peaceful atmosphere settled me whilst most were in their beds taking in sleep for the new day ahead...and yet here I am wide awake and grateful that I get to experience the beauty that is nature. Although I am still young, I long for the days where it felt like nothing could stop me and I felt free. The feeling of being a kid and doing whatever felt right.This is what I longed for in those late nights where I could just stare up at the sky with no burdens or worries holding me down. No one but me and the moon; the solitude of knowing that I could just think. But as the stars look down on me, their slow orbit pulling me into a trance, I smile knowing that whatever the future may hold...I'll still have my late nights where I can just think and feel as though I were still that burden-free child I once was."

Oh just perfect. I found this at 3:20 am. Il keep listening.😊

The fact I got recommended this at exactly 4:00am

Nah you're wrong, its 5 am.

actually it's 5am but nice try

Hell yeah (i've been crying for the past 3 hours and it is indeed 4 am)

Meaningless, soft and undemanding music. Peace of mind. Makes me understand why my brother wanted it to last forever. Life can be so noisy and this place a sanctuary to rest. I worry how much I love it here and not the light of day. Maybe because I can be with myself and the people I’ve lost. If you are seeking this peace to last eternal, just know you won’t be able to enjoy it once your gone. Sleep is our placebo and day our battle to rest safe. I hope you can find more beautiful times in life.

I am now full time care taker of my daughter. It is now 3:18am and she is sleeping beside me. Just finished leveling in world of warcraft while she is asleep. I feel peace.

It’s 3:30 no expectations at this time. I love the quietness sitting in my pajamas. Just allowed to be.

Currently 4:08 AM and I have finished 9 week-long procrastinated projects/tasks in under 4 hours

“Always by your side” “All I need” “As the light fades” Wow these titles are extremely depressing because I can relate to these. I don’t have anyone who loves me. There is no one at my side. All I need is someone I can love who isn’t part of my family but I don’t. And… as the light fades… my mental health is fading. Life sucks.

I’m at work and it literally just turned 4:02am. Perfect mix for the time I suppose!!

Just wrote a short story for school about this girl named panthea who meets a boy name eleftheria. Her name means suffering in greek but his means freedom. The freedom to her suffering. The first line of the book is"perfect lights, a perfect room and perfect people" meanwhile at the end of the book (when she had just killed herself because eleftheria had died and she wanted to be with him forver) the end lines are "who needs perfect lights, perfect roomand perfect people? When you can have the one thing you need most...your freedom" anyways i just thought that it fit this playlist perfectly.

thanks for sharing my song "numb" :-) i hope you guys might check out more of my newer music too! thanks again

Listening to your enchanting melodies is like taking a serene journey through a blissful realm.Thank you for creating such a captivating haven of calmness and allowing us to immerse ourselves in the ethereal beauty of your compositions. Your channel is a true sanctuary for the weary spirit, a sanctuary where relaxation finds its perfect.❤❤❤❤❤

I love how everyone is up late for their own reasons and engaging with eachother. For instance it’s 3:50 and a mf just got up 20 min ago to get some water, now I can’t go back to sleep lol I hope the best for everybody reading this

currently at an airport at 3:20 AM in another country, pretty empty and liminal, just started the playlist... i'm so tired helppppp

It’s precisely 4am

praying in the future i reach all my goals and i meet someone who doesn’t make me feel so lonely and ugly. all throughout my life i never really had friends and my whole 4 years of highschool i sat by myself at lunch and never spoke in class. my teachers often marked me absent because i sat in the back and i was so quiet. when classmates would hear me talk for the first time they would always point out how they’ve never heard my voice before. i’ve never dated anyone and i often feel like the energy and effort i put into people isn’t reciprocated. im so lonely man and i don’t know what im doing wrong. nobody cares about me the way i care about them. my life just revolves around the gym work and school. why do guys only want me intimately? they never care to understand me on a deeper level. hopefully my future husband will care for me the way i pray he does.

3:47 aug14 sitting here just with my thoughts makes me realize how much anger i have bottled up over time, it’s an odd feeling not having anything to do with this emotion so i try to push it down and evade it for as long as possible. i know time can only move forward and things in the past don’t have an effect on me today but i can’t help but stew and just ask “how could you?” you know?

why does nobody love me? what am i doing wrong. i take care of my health i go to the gym, i care about my looks and personality. what’s wrong with me that i cant see

love when I am in the city. it just feels amazing. I feel like an alien

Its 3.22 am for me, but in my defense i did just hop off minecraft bc i stayed up playing one last night before summer ends with my brother and we made a new survival world. So can you blame me?

whenever i listen to this, i think about it. my crush, my life, everything ive achieved; was it really worth it? the talking stage i had with him, i was so happy, hearing the faint laughter, rain crashing down on the car windows as i gazed at the city, just everything that made me feel fuzzy inside. but im in my bed, all cozy with low dim lighting, just a girl waiting for something great to happen.

I'm not *still* awake. I just woke up for work, I feel miserable

It is 4am and I am awake :) Tho I know I am going to be insanely tired for tomorrow's work

Yeah duh, I’m working graveshift

Repent of your sins and trust in Christ for salvation. “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No man comes to the Father except through me.” John 14:6

I got this video recommend to me at exactly 4am wtf

The fact is it is actually 4 am here right now

A time of hope for the future and gratitude for the past. How I long to be amongst the stars, how others have longed to be safe. We all have desires, but few take time to appreciate what they already have - it’s in moments like this that we are truly alive. That feeling of the warm summers breeze against the twilight summers sky.. watching the moon commence its journey overhead once again.. life is what you make it to be so never forget to relax every once in a while. God am I lucky to be here at the age of 15 with my whole life ahead of me, I hope you all feel the same

It’s just amazing to see one of these videos while your scrolling around, just watching it while thinking about your life.. and reading the comments

"You're alone?, hm.. don't worry the end of all of this are coming" -The Crimson Stalker

One day the silence will consume all. There is beauty and peace in silence. Just enjoy the loud chaotic world and all of your emotions- even the bad ones. Remember things that your peers taught you like it’s okay to rely on others. The meaning of life is enjoying your day to day and helping other people do the same or at least bringing some glimmer of hope and happiness to them. Be with your friends and family and build relationships whether they be existing or new… that is most people’s goal in the end. If you’re reading this I hope you get there. If you have to wade through the mud so be it, just fight and stay diligent and you will come out victorious among whatever you’re going through.

ill watch this some other time when i feel bad

Keep posting these beautiful playlists my friend, youre doing so many people a favour! ❤❤

[0:00] Lonnex - losing (Sped Up) [5:11] Akame - let me sleep [7:19] tilekid - you not the same (deep version) [11:30] hozuki - snowfield [15:08] Mathbonus - There Is Light In Us [19:58] a vow - one of those nights [21:44] my head is empty - numb [23:03] Evacuxte - Doubt [24:52] Oneheart, ashess - rescue [26:32] Oneheart - nostalgia [28:27] Oneheart - watching the stars (Slowed + Reverb) [30:20] Oneheart - apathy (Slowed + Reverb) [32:08] Kangurul - Always By Your Side [38:44] 18FEARS - safe [40:48] Borna.J - Ocean [44:28] jakub. - and then the chaos began. [46:30] O2N - I Hope We Meet Again [51:46] Antent - Your Eyes [53:45] trapeia - start living [56:01] castle hearts - i wish i could [57:57] castle hearts - all i need [1:00:32] mxpheebz - The Beach (Instrumental) (Slowed + Muffled) [Original by The Neighbourhood] [1:04:28] Dreamer33 - Im Lost. [1:06:30] Lonnex - losing (Sped Up)

it's so make me relaxing and stay calm. hum, at my place rn it's already 2.25AM. i think ddis playlist it's great too if we use for meditation. ❤

omg it's literally 4AM and I'm still awake

4:18 am I'm in my bed still thinking I'm a failure

I don't like the day at all. My head works better at night. Knowing that people sleep at night time makes the city more mine, more free.

It's actually 05,00 am and I feel like wanted to do stupid stuff.

Yup, 4am. I really gotta fix my sleep schedule

this shit is so peaceful. i love these kinds of videos, especally how i see the sunrise every single morning, i can never sleep these days

As you read this comment, all of a sudden your heart becomes full. You let on a little smile, and in your head you realized it’s been awhile since you did one of those. Everything is going to be alright, God has a plan for your life. Plans to prosper you and to keep you. If it doesn’t take too much out of you, tell someone you love them today. And if no one has told you lately, I love you.

For what reason do i stay up late, is it to ponder the inevitability of what will be. The fact that life will cease to exist. To be entranced by the universe. To question my own thoughts actions. Love, what a fleeting emotion, what a thing to be young and feel it. What a thing to lose it. If my steps were different, would it have ended the same way. What’s my purpose. For what reason have I glided my soul across this plane for the years of my life. Am I a mere existence. Or by god am I considered grand in the scheme of the universe. Will that person come back. Like a mystery how I wish the memories would fade away. How her face would be covered with a cloud of nostalgia. But those feelings, those experiences, are engraved so deeply into my soul, rejected from the heart of one who I held so dear, not once or twice, but five times. Can I go back? At least be friends. Would it even change anything. Or is love not meant for this life. Do I take the next step blindly or ponder on it. Do I look where my feet land or do I search for the next platform, do I wonder where the steps take me or do I follow blindly. Do I turn back? Can I turn back? What’s back there? Is it even anything left? Can I find something? What if I missed something that would change the course of my existence. Not possible. An error in my process, a flaw in my thinking, what’s done is done. But I can’t move forward, forever stuck on this step. Wondering if I go back or I go forward. But even if I move forward, it’s as if my previous step chases me into my precious future, do I cut off my feet? Do I leap, or do I jump into the void. Not landing on any steps. This day to day life might be killing me slowly. Putting a pause on my existence, a pause which doesn’t allow for character. For change. Am I even human anymore. Stop. Breathe, look up, admire the stars, the eternalness of creation which outlast the very fibers of your body, smell the space, feel the stars, hear the void, see the end. You, on the other side of the screen, what’s your story like? Would you risk it all to change it? Or do you move forward? Is what is held in your heart the most important thing, or is the destination you end up, the journey you took? On a path which was not paved but remembered, illusions by the doings of your own brain, Olivia I miss you alot, if you ever see this just know I would have risked it all to change how it ended, sincerely kiri, the Fanny pack boy

4:30 a.m. , august 5 2024 and can't sleep. I've even restarted a huge puzzle from years ago

someone here rn?

smacznej KAWUSI życzę każdej osobie, która to czyta ;)

4:46 AM while i write this. i tried to fall asleep hours ago. i have on and off insomnia, decided to strike tonight i guess. so here i am. when i can’t sleep, my thoughts are inescapable, and i’m left there replaying memories i don’t want to. it almost always leads back to her. i’ll spare you the story, but i miss her.

4:15am.

its 3:10 am, im smoking weed and listening to this playlist after having mental breakdown~

I mean... This time in my life I consider the day 24 hours and I don't care about day or night And I study most of the time although I know that I am in an unfair country for those who work so hard to achieve something in their live I want to get out of here so bad but I don't know how..

Жизнь совсем не такая легкая как я себе представлял. Сейчас мне 17 хоть ощущаю я себя на 16. Мне нравятся тусовки, общение, но так всегда складывалось, что я больше времени был один и это осознанный выбор. И вот я спрашиваю себя пройдут года и по каким критериям я буду считать прожил ли я хорошую жизнь или нет. Такое ощущение, что мне не хватило наивности, легкости, которой пронизаны года молодости. Возможно я слишком рано стал взрослым, все же мне не много не хватает вайба вечеринок, беспризорнечества. Я слишком рано сделал себя взрослым. Возможно этот момент настанет, но я чувствую, что не могу осознанно забить на все и просто веселиться, не возникнет такого чувства которого я хочу. Сейчас настало время, когда пора действовать и я буду. Я достигну успеха, для меня успех это нечто духовное, оно не определяется деньгами, оно придет по мере моего духовного становления, укрепления дисциплины, подсознательное игнорирования вредных импульсов, все это в совокупности и сделает меня успешным. В последнее время очень озабочен автомобилями. Мечтаю о GMA T50, Pagani Zonda 760, чувство когда ты сидишь в автомобиле, проносишься ночью, это чувство хоть и не происходило со мной вживую, но оно ни чуждо глубине моей души. Поэтому я мечтаю воплотить эти чувства в живую. Но как буд-то я не смогу сполна насладиться им и в целом жизнью, если у меня не будет отрезка с тусовками, беззаботностью, но как придет беззаботность, когда я уже анализировал это? Как? Получается даже если я буду тусить, отрываться все это будет неискренним и мой внутренний духовный гештальт не закроется. Спасибо за то, что мой отец до сих пор жив. Он мужчина. Хочу показать ему какого сына он вырастил, хочу подарить ему audi a6 allroad которую позволить он себе пока что не может. В моих ежедневных занятиях нет правды. Каждый день засыпаю с мыслями, что же я наделал, зачем я опять подрочил, потратил весь день, смотря бесполезные ролики на Ютубе, опять съел шоколадки, ничего не меняется и ничего не поменяется с таким образом жизни, Артем. В последнее время я раздумываю о том, чтобы убрать все отвлекающие факторы и добиться этого внутреннего чувства успеха. Будет много соблазнов, препятствий, я это понимаю, но не достигнув внутреннего чувства успеха я не заслуживаю жить. Соответственно каждый день, когда я не занимаюсь построением успеха я просто не заслуживаю жить этот день. Я вернусь сюда через 3 года. Моя жизнь изменится навсегда, через три года я буду читать этот текст в совсем другом положении, состоянии. Я иду без возбуждения, взволнованности я иду из за долга. из за того что я мужчина и должен достичь всего чего хочу. без детской наивности с пониманием того что возможно умру на этом пути но лучше умереть так чем смотря однотипные видосы булкина. это будут 3 долгих года, я сделаю их долгими потому что буду проживать каждый день преодолевая желания, соблазны. наверно идеально у меня не получится прожить, по крайней мере я буду иметь суперкары мечты, а еще subaru wrx sti на которой буду хасанить по снегу в горах Франции. после того как вдоволь накатаюсь, вернусь в свою виллу, где пожарю сочнейшый стейк из барана которого я добыл из лука в недельном походе в лес, сидя на стуле в -15 на столе стейк, на мне самые качественные вещи, куртка cp company хлопья снега по всюда красивейшая панорама на горы. А я просто сижу после прекрасной поездки наслаждаясь моментом, чтобы потом пойти вновь заниматься разработкой своего собственного гиперкара, при этом укрепляя свое понимание мира, свою духовную силу. этот момент который я наверно хочу прожить больше всего в жизни в гараже пагани гма м5 е60, суба, я занимаюсь собственной разработкой и ниче больше меня не волнует, время развернулось вспять, больше не существует такого духовного понятия как время существует момент в котором ты ловишь каждый вдох наслаждения с внутренней гармонией и пониманием того, что вот -- ты добился того самого успеха, ты смог этого сделать и тебя больше не волнует ничего, хоть завтра закончиться жизнь, мне все равно я прожил абсолютно сладчайшую ее часть и умру с честью перед самим собой. я смог это сделать. умру с честью перед отцом. просто лягу на снег закрою глаза и буду наслаждаться каждым вдохом............... нет это не импульс 2024 года новый год новая жизнь это настоявшийся момент все эти мысли они настолько безструктурны но только ночью в тишине они могут прийти, эти ценнейшие мысли могут прийти но если все будет структурно то ты не проживешь эти случайные моменты счастья когда ты на коттедже слушаюсь с другом ебнутый реп прыгая в конвульсиях хавая при этом шаверму а потом через час за вами приедет полиции и вы поедете в отдел. так в чем счастье. я лично оиднаково наслажусь этим моментом и чувством того что я смог что я добился успеха но чувство этого счастья не возникнет когда ты жиыешь структурно ты просто не дашь ему возникнуть. Вообщем мне еще предстоить изучить жизнь и за эти 3 года я постараюсь это сделать по максимуму. но а сейчас я пойду прогуляюсь по ночному-утренему сосновому бору, городку с насленеим 80к в котором не умеют мечтать....

i feel so tired 🙁. i don’t know what im doing, im scared, i don’t want to grow up.

Literally found this exactly on 4am. Thanks ⛓️💠

It's only 1 lmao, but I'm probably going to be up til 4 AP classes are a bitch

Having to work 10 hrs the next day i wish i could be up at 4 am

August 18th, 2024- i found this at like 4.15. I’ve been anxious ab my upcoming senior year in high school and the overwhelming feeling of being 18. Ik there will be times when i won’t have the privilege anymore to stay up until 4 am and listen to chill music on yt, and that is why im gonna fully enjoy it as much as i can.

I’m so tired…

1:01 AM I hugged my pillow and inexplicably burst into tears. He did me horribly wrong, I know, but he also did me horribly right. Life is strange in the way that someone can take advantage of you, cheat, lie, and throw you away like nothing but you will still find yourself longing for them late at night when your texts won't go through and the only sound is soft music and the white noise of a whirring fan through the silence. His voice used to be apart of all that silence. I remember his laugh like it was yesterday and I remember his touch like it was a moment ago. I remember his eyes and his smile and his jokes and his sex and his love and his hate. I wonder if I will ever feel again? If I have the capacity to love without feeling like a traitor. When I attempted, I wrote in his letter to "meet me in the stars, old friend. We are stars not yet dead, I feel we have more to go." He never read that letter and it feels symbolic. I hope to someday meet another star.

its 3:39 am, and i got school in 2 hours. I've been getting 1 hr of sleep every night bruh.

Its almost 2am and i have to get up early to travel. Its quiet in my room but i feel a lot of bad energy. My eyes are sore and my throat hurts. I wish i could sleep, instead im mourning my thoughts and feelings

We need positive energy because we are human beings and man is weak before the face of God Almighty. We are only human beings. We make mistakes, correct things, and return to mistakes. We want to be free, without deep thinking, no negative thoughts, no failure, no fatigue, and no exhaustion. We only need rest and a place in which we can rest. We certainly warn you that we are human beings and we have a personality that wants comfort and positive energy, and all of the above you will possess when you are a Muslim, obedient to your Lord, praying that your life is positive, where everything I said is positive, you will find it in Paradise because you only did that.. ♡

Monday August 5, 2024 and 4:23 AM Welp- things are going pretty bad rn, I honestly don't complain that much usually but, I really can't sleep, idk why nor the cause but, I can spend HOURS with my eyes closed and don't feel sleepy at all Also other things are going pretty bad but, I'm gonna get over it sooner or later, things can't always be the same forever, can they? Life goes on, the world goes on and if I give up rn, I will never figure out if things could have gotten better or not I'm willing to wait for a change. Even if it takes years. Life can't always be awful, or at least I refuse to think that There's this one show which kinda gives me energy to keep going, it's pretty nice, I haven't been able to tell the story of the show to anyone yet but, someday the opportunity will be there, I guess If someone actually reads this and somehow is going through something similar or something hard I may have no idea on who you are but, you have all my support, life sometimes is bad, unfair and other stuff but we can get through it if we propose to do so. You will be able to tell someone about your favorite intrest or thing one day. You will be able to tell your feelings to the rest one day. You will live the life that you want to one day. Sometimes you have to hit the bottom to be able to push yourself back up.

Are you okay?

it just turned 4:02 A.M, I logged onto youtube to look for some ASMR and got recommended this video. RU-vid knows me too well.