John Gray-How To Ask A Man For What You Need (Without Being Needy) 

You’re welcome 😊

Men should be indifferent (where you mention detachment that is a good thing) towards women & focused on their goals. Quite frankly a man should never need a woman to complete himself ever. Want yes, need no. Being needy puts you the female on a pedestal that right there is scarcity mindset & is never healthy. It's like he's a little boy seeking approval from his mother. Your not his mum. You both should listen on youtube to how to be a 3% man. It should help him control those feminine emotions or at least recognise when he's been in it too long. It will help you as well. Corey Wayne is the original author & is also on youtube. Corey is pretty much teaching what John does. I listen to them both, however video's like this one are only a snippet of knowledge shared & is not enough on it's own as it's cherry picking. The audio i mention is in it's entirety from starting out as a single person to marriage & how to keep things alive. Always remember if things go off think about how you both did things in the beginning. Lastly the dating never ends. He must not stop dating you

@@scorpnz4433 we're dating for about 1 year and 10 months 'Scary' for me what John Gray said is actually happened in me, he chased me like crazy at first, you know what he fell in love with me after a few interaction through twitter and he wanted to marry me. He was looking a women to marry and he found me first I rejected him over and over cause of his age, 43 at that time and I'm 28 with zero dating experience Kinda shocked me when we first met cause my brain can't functioned well he actually looked like 35 yo man, John Gray is right again I don't sexually attracted to him and it was a huge inner battle cause I'm not sure he's the man I want to marry 😳 He interested in me cause he saw in me that I have a strong power in sex. Like godness I know nothing about sex and he immidiately had that sexual attraction to me I'm shocked he said that! I never had a negative reaction when he said that at first, we don't do sex before marriage but idk I thought men should think about that sexual attraction to woman he wants then he can feel love and that's normal they're not a freak Then we started dating and he is sooooooo sweeet and want buy me everything I want Sadly yes he's been in his female side for a year when he's with me, then he has family issues right now and he's detaching from me. Honestly it caused a huge fight because I need him and things go off because why it seems so derailed it frustrated me like crazy I almost cry everyday why he's so focused on his problems and not make time to call me like he always does 😭 Actually we're on LDR, he's a committed man and he wants to marry me. He didn't change his goal to marry me even after we had a huge fight in june cause I forced him to speak. He's a good man and never did something that hurt me, he even never yelled at me. He once said he's happier when I 'm happy Bitter truth you dropped, men should wants his women, but not need. But rn idk how to ask to him to do something for me but I don't want to force him like I did before cause I love him Thank you for your advice it opened my mind I'll search right away 😘

@@auroraworshiper8958 Yes i see now there are quite a few red flags in your reply (red flags means not good & be very weary). The audio i referred to is going to help you understand what's happening & why. Watch it yourself do not show it to him. After listening to the audio you should be able to make a far better judgment on what your next course of action is. It will help you test him & his sincerity towards you. This assumes the guy has any integrity. My advice right now if i read correctly is not to contact him. By the way if he was truly committed does his actions prove it or do they say something else. Ignore his words look at his actions what do they tell you. Everything i've written here & in my first post comes from the audio i mention. Do not waste anymore time get listening & get on with your life, whether it's with or without him. Finally get yourself a good quality man not a mediocre

@@scorpnz4433 could you tell me which one are the red flags? No no I don't cry anymore I understand what is happening to him it's really complex. I don't contacted him but when he's ready he talks to me He lives with his only mother and he loves her so much, he wants to propose me come to my home and meet my family but he can't. He's ready but his feet can't move due to the situation His 2 sisters live in abroad, that's the only problem rn we personally no longer have issue. It's all okay and I don't bury my emotion under the rug He said by himself he's dealing with hard situation and he said don't ever go

@@auroraworshiper8958 The biggest & most concerning red flag is you have put your life on hold for a guy who is not around & he is nothing more than mirage at this point. Have you seen the mother & know for sure she's ill & he's not some mummy's boy. I have told you what you need to do in my previous post. That will pinpoint the amount of red flags there are, since you know the situation or believe you do. In the end he isn't with you & where is the rest of the family,uncles,aunts ,cousins etc,etc. You need to decide what to do once you understand if he's worthy. Right now it doesn't appear so..good luck

That can happen Virgie! Thanks for watching and for your comments too!

@@MichelleMarchantJohnson thank you for your reassurance. God bless you.🙏

BS

Look at it as a good thing that they don’t need a man. They have removed themselves from the dating pool lol. I’m with you. I love a good man. Love. It’s just about finding the right man. Every pot has a lid. But a lid won’t fit every pot. Warmth and love while being clear you have standard will usually do the trick. The guy that doesn’t run is for you. I saw a video by a dating coach where his now wife said that he would not be around for long because men don’t like that she has to be home fairly early, and they don’t stick around. He truly liked her and he said his brain lit up. “Other men can’t hack it? Hmmm. I can. I can be that guy. I can meet this challenge.” And it made it so clear to me to the right guy can’t be discouraged easily. So a guy run off by standards was never going to be the right guy.

"I need you to help me with x"...will give the best results but trigger many people who care more about being perceived as independent.

​@@whocarescrapsaHow do you ask for empathy and caring and listening if a man doesn't even know how to do these things and barely understands what they are?

He’s full of great information but this is just circles and tangents without specific answers❤️

I’m looking for the same thing, I saw it once in a video of his but can’t find it again

In other videos I saw John saywhen asking a man for something you use the words will you or would you. It gives the option to say yes or no. Could you or can you doesn't give a option to say yes or not but they take it more as a demand.

This works on all humans. "Mommy needs you to help her carry the parcels into the house!" vs "I HAVE ASKED YOU A HUNDRED TIMES TO CARRY.....". Same works with men. Everyone wants to be needed. This is often confused with being needy.

It's "will you" not "could you".

It is a common mistake men make and is very easy to do. Our first relationship with a woman is our mother. That becomes our model of what a woman is. It sounds really daft because they are completely different. Our mother will die trying to protect us. We must die trying to protect you. It is the exact opposite.

work on self-esteem.