my son actually said that "i told you once i love you , that stays in effect until i tell her otherwise" and that's when Mamma had a long heavy conversation i think he heard most of it he and my lovely daughter in law have been married for going on more than 20 years now i'm proud to say!
"The key to getting what you want is giving your spouse what they want." That is very true, and very wise. I think the reason many women brush aside physical intimacy as non-important or even discusting is partly because they dont realize this is an actual need for guys, and partly because of the rape culture/ unhealthy & distorted view our society has concerning physical intimacy. It's taboo to talk about it. The incorrect messages we get are: 'Sex is bad before marriage, but good after marriage.' 'After marriage sex can happen whenever the guy wants it, and whenever he wants it it should happen', ect..... Men and women need to work together on this in marriage.
Really great material, and funny also! My husband has told me, “I put a roof over your head and food on the table!” I told him, “My dad did that.” Didn’t work! I told him about these videos, he said he will watch them with me!! Now let’s see if this works👍🙏
3:00-5:20 very true All single women (esp those in relationships) need to see this clip. Just because someone is intimate with you does not mean they love you. You have to do things in the right order. A man has to prove to or show a woman he will take care of her BEFORE she rewards him with intimacy.
The most important concept of all of this is - the key to get what you want is to give your spouse what he/she wants . That is called - love - think about how to give , not how to take .
Glad he stands for purity! Yes, praise God for what Irish stated, it is about getting back to Scripture and its holy wisdom and taking significant time to learn the Bible cover to cover. Though it does assist to understand how men think and I know it helps me when my husband is totally quiet. I naturally think is something wrong? Is he not happy with me or something else? Yes, men sometimes simply need their silent time and I need mine as well. Though I do not believe in comedy time in the church and wisdom of the differences can be handled in a more respective way which honors the LORD. Of course, all Biblical admonishes for both men and women should be taught in the church, including women dressing modestly, being silent in the church, wearing the head-covering if a woman is married and is submissive to her husband; plus, having long hair. Both loving and respecting each other, possessing pure speech, not setting evil things before one's eyes such as is common on the television are important to stress. One could go on and on with the necessities.
this measn i can never have an earthly soulmate. who will be eternally inerest in my heart without just seeing me as an object to get pleasrue from.. .. only jeus can be this soulmate. theres not a single earhtly one
It's interesting and makes so much sense how Mark explained tgat the key to a women's 😊 is through her ❤ by doing sweet acts of kindness and showing you care. But what ways can a woman get to a man's ❤ through his 😊 without her giving him her 😊 right away? What I'm meaning to ask is how to get a guy sexually interested in a woman without the woman giving him her 😊 before marriage?
The fact that you are dating means he is sexually interested. You dont have to give him anything. You decide if you want to share the ups and downs of life with the person not the sex drive. Just be aware of how it affects him. If hes worth a crap as a man he will respect your stance and if hes a quality man will have learned to have a similar one. Not that anyone is perfect and we all have to live with the decisions weve made previously.
The ugly truth : for men to give you love,give them carnal satisfaction.for women : to acquire love from men is to satisfy them first..tsk such a sad reality NOWADAYS.
Hilarious thanks. But in defense of smiley face, its creator had far greater intent than a mere act of recreation for husbands and a chore for wives. Jesus referred to it as "two becoming one flesh", and Paul, “a profound mystery”. Now that really is something to get excited about. It also happens to mark the beginning of our very existence. Small wonder then that the devil has reduced such a precious gift to a swear word and object of derision, along with the name of the creator Himself.
@@mhajanchumren1200 Fair comment. But I think that genuinely appreciating and acknowledging a presentation should not preclude the possibility of expressing a reservation about it. After the laughter had subsided, I was left with a residual sadness that we have lost or give up something precious… if indeed we ever had it. My comment was intended as a gentle challenge to believers, rather than as a criticism of the presenter.
my second wife went through a time where she held a grudge against me and refused to have sex. We were both christians and I tried to explain what the scripture says about not withholding our bodies from one another but she refused to listen. It absolutely ruined our marriage, along with her inability to compromise and not control everything. I learned later that she had been traumatized as a young girl but by then our marriage was over. So I would only add (concerning sex issues) that both male and female make sure thy have dealt with unresolved emotional or mental health issues before getting married and while married. It can lead to a sexless, no communication, and chaotic relationship that is doomed to fail, unless a miracle happens.
There us a lot of good stuff here. Though, and i hope he covers it later, the key to a guys heart is safety and security. Every single time i have been vulnerable with a woman, at some time in the future she has used that information against me. In an argument or disagreement or just to manipulate me to get what she wants. The key to a mans heart is to treat his fears, concerns, life worries with respect and decency. Each time a woman violates that, she is telling the man "I don't care about you. I care so little about your deepest fears i will use this to make you do something you don't want to do. You as a human being are nothing. "
So how do you get to a wife's heart if she never intended to give it to you in the first place? My wife was a product of divorced parents and was raised by her mother in another state. She always dreamed of the day her and her father could finally be together. After marriage, they never changed their roles within the whole leaving and cleaving thing. She made all the decisions for our life with her father and once I mentioned it they just grew tighter together. After 14 years of marriage and 10 years of marriage counseling, marriage seminars, marriage sermons, bible studies and friends and family advice, I still to this day hear my wife tell me her father is her number one man. They discuss every aspect of our lives and decide what we are going to do together. I don't even get told what has been decided. I either see the results or overhear something. Her heart was never for the taking because she gave it to her father. Our marriage life, sex life, parenting life (including the actual kids) and friendship are completely dysfunctional.
This happens more often than you think... You are not alone in this. Doesn't make it more comfortable. Marriage is to reflect God's covenant with the bride being the church and the groom being Jesus. So on one end the bride (church) is SO honoring God as to be given to the Son (Jesus) as this relationship with Jesus moves forward....we (groom) men.... Are to love the wives as Jesus loves the church. He died for them..(as well as ALL that believe) to save them from their debt to sin) cuz the payment for sin is death. We as (Christian men) are told to provide for and protect our families or we are worse than an unbeliever. We are told to honor the marriage. We are to love our spouse. Sometimes we "feel" we get the short end of the deal when things don't work out well in our fallen world's perspective this side of heaven. God still knows where our hearts are...if the only thing we want is for the spouse to give us the heart or the happy place...where does God Himself lay in our priorities? God has allowed us to have sex with our spouse and it is intended to be a great thing...but it is a way to keep from being tempted by the enemy and trappings of this world... Seems as though this series is a topical addressing of how to get along in the marriage no matter what faith one has... The idea of entertainment seems to draw a lot of folks in to try to make God seem like a fun Guy and Christians aren't a bunch of sticks in the mud and are "negative Nancys" etc. Jesus did say that we would have trouble in this world .. He also said that He has overcome the world.. Trusting HIM through the life we have is a challenge for folks that have been fed only the feel good positive stuff to draw people into the community of believers that may not even know Jesus...but can have a good time in this world. I know of someone in the same situation that idolizes her physical dad... On the one hand...we are told to honor our parents. The husbands are told to cleave from our families and cling to the wives. The wives are never told to cleave from theirs...the husband often becomes an addition to the family...and often times if the husband speaks up about how he seems to be getting the leftovers of her heart or time...he is seen as "needy" or demanding or controlling or whatever it is that can paint us to be the "enemy" trying to divide a happy family. The wives are also told to repsect their husbands...has the church ever taught how to do this? This is not meant to be a church bashing thing...nor a wife bashing thing... But in our times (as nothing new under the sun) we have the Gospel of Jesus (good News) that truly IS the power unto Salvation....and then we have all the things that we can get distracted by and cause us to be more OF this world and not just IN it. Jesus told is that if we love our spouses more than Him...we are not fit for His Kingdom. Seems like the marriage is just like the walk with Jesus... We die to ourselves daily and pick up our cross to let the Spirit of the One True God live in us and through us to those around us as He gets the glory... He is a merciful and gracious God (Who has provided a way for our being right with Him while we were yet sinners) And marriage is not a finish line...but a new day every day for opportunities to grow in Faith in Jesus (even if it feels like we are the welcome mat) that provides a place for folks to disregard as they travel about their day... Hope this helps. I don't mean to go information overload... 😇😎😀 Jesus also knows what it is like to go through what you're going through. The walk can be tough...but finishing strong with Him is a good walk to be taking. 😇😎😀
Jeffrey Potter I have switched my focus from my wife to my relationship with God. In spite of how I'm treated by my wife, I am, through the word and with Jesus strength, working on loving her sacrificially in the way Jesus loved the church. It's not easy and it involves a lot of praying and fighting against falling into depression. I know that God provided me with my wife and the wedding vows that were made were to God. I'm honoring my vow to him and I hope and wait (very impatiently at times) for her to be the wife God has called her to be
@@SnookOnTheFly All men following Jesus are there with ya' brother! Just imagine how Hosea would interpret these videos. We as humans look for programs and quick fixes...and if Jesus is not the Head of the body...it is all in vain. 😇😎😀 Keep growing in Christ Jesus.
Treat yourself the way you deserve and people will treat you the way you treat yourself. If you give yourself enough respect, you would not have to suffer from being with those who dont deserve you.
I watched this for a Gender & Communications class I'm taking. I was loving this talk until this video. Women who have sex before marriage are dumb? There's no way I would marry a man who was only marrying me in order to have sex. I think that's what's wrong with a lot of marriages today. Young people are getting married straight out of high school because they think they're in love, but what's really driving them is the biological need to reproduce. Wanting sex is nothing to be ashamed of. Even if you're religious, I think we can agree that it's part of how we're "wired". By putting some weird value on the myth of female virginity we're setting people up for marital failure. If we put sex on a pedestal, it becomes the ultimate goal. Take it off the pedestal and focus on the really important stuff.
Is this guy really a Christian pastor? Not once out of the six videos I’ve watched of his has he referenced a Bible verse or anything about us loving one another like Christ loves the Church, not for what He can get out of the Church, but because He is God and is love. With that kind of love of course we will want to be intimate with one another. I pray he is a Christian and will learn to incorporate the Scriptures into his teaching because he is right about our minds working differently from one another’s.
Wacky Bird It all seems so selfish. So a man only loves you for what he can get? Is that really love? He only gives to get? In Malachi 2:15 it says the purpose for marriage is to produce godly children. Can’t we have higher ideals than just sex?
Amen. Mary -Jane. As we age it especially matters that it’s SO MUCH MORE than sex. I’m a widow after being married 26 years. When I miss my late husband, that’s the last thing that comes to mind, even though it was a wonderful expression of our love for one another. It’s also about loving our spouse like God loves us, through good and bad. Honoring God first and then we’ll honor one another.
This is bronze age agrarian times advice to modern women. In those days men used to be productive at the age of 18 and married women who were 16. In modern times, things have deteriorated to the point where men are comfortably established before 25, more like 30. This creates a problem because women are desperate to snare a man and men sense that and make all kinds of promises just to get sex for the decade before marriage.
So, we guys are just in it for the sex and she's just in it for the heart. As long as we stroke her heart we'll get the end product, and she can use the sex to make sure we stroke her heart right. Quite a fleshy overview of marriage that portrays us as mere manipulators just out to satisfy our own desires. Where does marriage as a picture of Christ and His bride fit into all of this? Is Jesus just in it for the sex? Not a very godly way to look at it all, and although I'm certain it strikes a chord with many, I don't think he has a lot of it right. But hey, he's getting the crowds, he's getting the laughs, so what's the big deal, right? Behold the professing Church of Christ.
RPM11111 i know this comment is like 2yrs old, but I'd like to point out that he's talking to a non christian crowd. Ofcourse it goes way further then that in a christian marriage but that's not the point he's trying to make.. I'm 25 yrs old and about to be married and these 4 vids helped me alot to understand some of her ways of thinking.
@ RPM11111 His teaching is awfully fallacious and deceiptful . It portrays the married woman as a WHORE who trades sex , not as a true wife whose body belongs to her husband the day they get married. This man teaches that access to the marriage bed has to be "earned" when the Bible says that it is entirely FREE . Have you ever read 1 Corinthians 7:5 and how sex in marriage is a due for both spouses and not just the husband -as he puts it so fallaciously ? Saying that a man has to "earn" access to the marriage bed is not only heretic but plain devilish . It gives the woman control . She is in total control ! Devilish. She is in it for the sex too because TRUE Christians , male and female get married in order to avoid sexual immorality. But the instructions on marital duty are being intentionally overlooked or bashed. If sex is not free in marriage , then fornication is ok . Yet those quacks preach that fornication is wrong. Very serious.
if this is reality this is bloody sad. only jesus cares about our heart without wanting anything back. here on earth humans will only find momentum to do u good care after your heart be ur friend if u pay them with pleasure. sad
There is a great deal of wisdom in this and I appreciate the translation service. However, for many women, traditional marriage is no longer a fundamental life goal and in my experience, treating sex like a commodity is never a good idea in a relationship. The underlying goal here to promote mutual understanding is laudable, but doesn't quite get to the heart of a relationship commitment between two adults who choose to build a life together, whether in a conventional marriage or otherwise. And by the way, I count amongst my friends many happy couples who lived together for several years before getting married. Just because something might not fit your individual spiritual/religious perspective is no reason to label it "dumb." I think this is a shame because this attitude detracts considerably from the value of much of this seminar.
Yeah, I think this part of the seminar is communicated abit weirdly. Like to me I understand it as women need to feel loved to want sex, men need to have sex to feel loved. But again, that's just one part of a relationship and the way we're wired. It's not the main thing you want in a relationship because if it is then really you're better off being single and doing whatever you want. Being in a happy, healthy and committed relationship means being with someone who you want to share your life with, who makes you happy and in return you want to make them happy too. Not "oh I want this so I'll give that person that so I'll get what I want". Relationships need to be based on mutual affection and respect and growing together as a couple.
@ Vanida Knutson Husbands AND wives need sex . That is what the Bible preaches ( 1 Corinthians 7:5). Not what this man preaches. To put it more accurately, it is MARRIAGE that needs sex because its purpose is sexual in itself.
Yeah, best advice to girls, don't have sex with a guy until he learns how to be nice to you and also marries you.... So he does, being nice and all, the whole package, except turns out he has a micro one and lasts 5 seconds in bed... Really?
QTRPounder Mom , If you don’t have sex outside of wedlock, you won’t have anything to compare it to, once you’re married. You will not call it “terrible” sex. Sex is more than a sport.
Everything was funny till this part. Stop saying men care about sex more than women do. That's the stupidest thing ever. And no, man are also interest in friendship and hanging out with their partners, don't be ridiculous, that's all old misogynistic stuff.
He starts these videos with jokes and makes little comments about wives training their husbands. He eventually comes out and actually tells wives to use sex to train their husbands. He tells them in later videos to withhold sex until they (the wives) get what they want. After watching all 9 segments, I can honestly say that this guy is not teaching what is in the Bible. No where in the Bible does it instruct wives to train their husbands. The Bible says "Do not with hold sex from your spouse." So, when he tell wives to withhold sex, he is contradicting the Bible.
