OCT 8 was my birthday, and i planned not to acknowledge it or tell anyone about it who didnt already know. and, still, i shut down my phone to avoid the few who do. ...the acknowlegement of the JAN births and anniversaries seemed silly at the onset. even those who it was relevant to seemed hesitant about standing. ...but it soon felt like a gift to me too. and i let the words gather around me as i sat in my heartache, aloneness, and silence. ...and then there's the sermon and the 1st-time-ever alter call for women. i was 1st reminded that what the world sees as awkward/weird is my brand of strength. and this right before GOD rained on me and in me as i also stood at the alter being acknowledged as representative of HIS goodness. | HE remembers me. amen.