I’m autistic. Undiagnosed. I’ve told my mum and asked if we could start looking at a diagnosis. She didn’t realise I was autistic because I am heavy masking and the other traits I didnt mask she thought was just a strong personality. I can’t get a diagnosis without her. It’s really hard being autistic but not being able to have something to say when I need a break or something. One at schoo, they had a “percussion “ workshop. They gave us all pots and pans and drum sticks to bang. I didn’t like metal sounds but 50 kids banging pots and pans to gather very hard all at once was a nightmare. I asked my teacher if I could leave because they had let another girl (diagnosed autistic) out of the room. They thought I was bored and wanted to skip. I literally ran out of the room to the girls toilets and shut myself in there until they sent one of my friends after me to see if I was ok. ( sorry if I vented)
Me too. I'm trying to get an assessment but it's taking quite a while hopefully it happens soon. I'm convinced I'm Autistic but I just need confirmation.
I have been referred for an assessment but it really hurts not knowing how long it will take since there isn't any information anywhere for Leicestershire. I am just starting year 11 and feel that I need an assessment before GCSEs but don't know what to do. Good luck with convincing your mum. Also it is worth checking the NHS website to see who can refer you since you may be able to get referred through school. Update: I found out yesterday that due to a doctor messing up my Tourette's referral (I got a private diagnosis) the waiting time from that has boosted me to the top of the waiting list and I have my initial appointment in a few weeks!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think it could help if you try and get help from school or sit down with your mum and show her diagnostic criteria and talk about how you relate to that (I know it’s not that easy to talk about emotions eg for some people like myself ) but I hope this helps and good luck getting the diagnosis
“I’m assuming you’re probably autistic if you’re watching this…” Allistic viewer here- I enjoy watching content like yours to learn about people who are different from me. Thanks for your advocacy and vulnerability!
I'm undiagnosed, but lately I've been thinking a lot about being autistic. The points you mentioned, resonated so deeply with me. I've always felt like I didn't belong and instead of going out I just sat in my room for hours and wrote. Thanks for making me feel like I'm not alone
you're so welcome!! you're definitely not alone, and diagnosed or not, i hope understanding your traits can help you find accommodations that make things a little easier for you 💖
Omg Zara. Thank you so much for this video, I saw you a couple of weeks ago and was so happy to get to meet you, please keep doing what you are doing. You are amazing and inspire so many people. I am starting out as a new RU-vidr and am also LGBTQ and Neurodivergent and I thank you for everything you do xx
I love your videos. I am a late diagnosed autistic person with ADHD and luckily sleepovers were okay because mostly my parents were there, and some were with my autistic cousins. Birthday parties were okay because they were mostly pool parties, or we made our own pizza or we would bounce or it was at a kids place. They all included activities where I did not have to interact with others and no one will care. They are overwhelming but I could stim freely. As an adult and when I was a teen, they are more overwhelming because I can hardly do that anymore and I am always by myself with my ear loops and fidgets and stim toys and I would stim by rubbing my hands. Bonus points if they had pets and good food.
Hey Zara👋 I was diagnosed with autism when i was around 5 years old. Now i am 23, and still learning about myself. I find that loud noises can be hard for me (along with a lot of other things). I am happy that i found a work place where being neurodivergent is common, so we are helping eachother!💖 Also, nothing to do with the video, but just wanted to share that our family dog of 13 years died today. We burried her and i had a cry (i'm still a bit sad). Love her🐶💝💙 Wish ya'll a good day💓
When I go to one of my friends houses no matter what she ALWAYS finds away to annoy someone in her house to get shouted at by her parents and she KNOWS I don’t like loud noises or people shouting so I don’t like going round to her house. Btw this is one of my really close friends. I love your channel and you make me feel so so welcome ❤
I had so many "staring at an imaginary camera" and mouth-dropping moments watching this, as it progressivly made more and more sense, it's crazy. Thank you for this video!
Growing up I always got sent home from parties because I didnt want to join in with everyone or eat the food or I acted out because it was too much sensory wise. The last party i went to was when i was 7 years old! Then a few months ago one of my ND school friends asked me to organise her birthday party and I invited a bunch of kids (all her friends) and we had an amazing time just at a park. Some of our friends just sat alone, some were running about, some chatting etc but there was no expectation to do anything. It was fantastic! I realised afterward that everyone who had been there pretty much was ND or otherwise disabled!
I am sooo lucky to have joined an incredible small fandom with so many ND people, and even though I don't chat much to anyone there, everyone just radiates such good vibes and it makes me so, so happy.
Hi! Zara you are amazing and I could never thank you enough for all that you have done. You have helped me accept myself as autistic. Thanks you so much! Please carry on being your AMAZING self. Love you SO much.❤ (also you are my favourite RU-vidr and have been for a long time)
With having asperger's syndrome the hardest thing for me is just trying to feel normal, like i've always felt like an alien on earth or something. I always try my best to push those thoughts out of my head but sometimes it pops up.
HIII ZARA I MISSED WATCHING YOU (Ive had school😭😭) but i agree! Im not autistic but i absolutely HATEEEEEE parties unless i know some ppl, i just have the urge to go in the corner and play geometry dash😭🫶
I have been so lucky to have found all neurodivergent friends who are all LGBTQIA+ members but I understand that a lot of people can’t find that and I understand entirely bc all throughout highschool I really struggled with friends. No-one understood any of my needs and everyone used to shut me out. I’ve now learnt to be the one who shuts them out before it becomes a problem. ❤❤❤
Addition to my previous comment a lot of these people are now in a bit of a bad way the parting lifestyle had a bit of a unforeseen circumstances. And now they use me as inspiration simply because I exist and do things normal people do I’m on the verge of hitting 30. And I see my autism as the biggest blessing in the world. Not to sound cliche but it is truly a superpower. However, for that being said it’s not a superpower because I’m doing simple tasks like dropping plastic bags in the recycling bin in front of the grocery store. it’s a superpower because it’s allowed me to be more introspective and keep me out of harms way
Thanks for posting these videos Zara! I’m a couple years younger than you and recently got diagnosed with autism! Sensory overwhelm is real! I love the song ‘subtitles’ by Noahfinnce he’s a trans man late diagnosed autistic (very similar to how I identify). His song is about sensory overload and working out how to do the world with autism. Thank you so much for your videos! They’ve been so helpful with coming to grips with my diagnosis! Highly recommended Noah’s song which I related to even before I found out that I’m autistic. But makes much more sense in retrospect! Thanks Zara! From Phoenix!
I 100% can relate and accommodating yourself is so important! The most amount of people I can have when celebrating stuff or anything like that is 1-3, my birthday literally just consisted of me and my other neurodivergent friend just being ourselves all day and I truly never feel alone when I’m with them. :D
you are absolutely not silly or stupid. your feelings are valid and our processing systems work differently when we're autistic! we literally ARE processing more information so it IS overwhelming our brains! you aren't overreacting 🩷
Thank you you have changed my life your videos are a highlight of the week I'm a boy starting my gcses I have tics probably tourettes and we are trying to get an autism diagnosis. Your the main person who made me question autism and found it explains a n awful lot. I'm very appreciative of everything you do thank you. Also I love all your jellycat.
I HATE sleepovers. Sure, fun, but at the same time I hate it (Not autistic nor diagnosed with anything btw). But it all kinda messes up EVERYTHING. From what I normally do to how I am. I make sure I eat about the same amount or less than my friends to fit in better. I try to eat and drink slower. And when they're over at mine, I feel like my room isn't my room, and I don't have my privacy. My freedom gets kinda taken away during sleepovers, and I have to interact with them the whole time they're awake. And then I don't know when they're *actually* asleep, so I try to fall asleep around the same time or after. It's so awkward waking up in the morning, too, because what if they woke up earlier? I hate it. I hate it I hate it I hate it. I try so hard to fit in but I don't, and I never will?
I got diagnosed with autism in January this year and have been struggling a bit but im glad i finnaly found what is the cause of my struggles and iv only had one successfull sleepover being autistic can be annoying at some times but can in some ways be good for some people
Thank you so much for this! Late-diagnosed autist here, but thinking back - I only did 1-on-1 sleepovers with those I suspect now were also neurodivergent. We would just sit down and play video games until 4-5 in the morning! 😂
I'm not autistic or in any other way disabled so it's hard for me to share the exact feeling, but I think in a lot points what you say fits to a lot of people, disabled or not. Thx for your video, it's nice to see not to be alone with such an issue ❤
I'm AuDHD and it's just been my first day of school after the summer holidays. It was really short and I basically didn't have to do anything or even think but I feel so drained. Everything was loud and too much for me. I'm just sitting on the sofa, doing nothing but scrolling on my phone even though it's warm and sunny outside and I NEED to eat something. I just can't bring myself to move because I'm desperately trying to recharge
thank you so much for this! im trying to get a diagnoses but its going to take a few years because of my existing diagnoses of PANDAS, my birthday is coming up so this was such perfect timing tyssm Zara!!!!
Parties are so hard. Both holidays with family or just celebrating with friends I often find myself in the bathroom just to escape all of the chaos. Found out I was autistic in June 🥳
I'm going to a birthday party this Friday, conveniently the birthday person is also autistic so everything will probably be alright 👍 thank you so much for making this video tho, it's helped me feel less alone 😊❤
Hello Zara! I love your videos so much, they're very informative and helpful!❤ Thank you for making them, lots of love to you! (First comment and like btw!)
If I didn't enjoy a party, I didn't pretend i enjoyed being there, i made it clear that it was TOO MUCH, TOO OVERWHELMING - summing it up: GET ME OUT OF HERE! I'm not going to say anything else because Zara said it all for me :D Thanks Zara! **note** im probably autistic but im undiagnosed**
Hi Zara this video is so true to me to! Parties are particularly stressful for me so thank you for sharing this!❤️ Also just wondering what the black band on your arm is it something medical or fashion? Love from wales 🏴
I am not diagnosed and this made me a little doubtful because as a child I loved birthday parties and sleepovers. I had very few friends and I felt comfortable around them, and even if it wasnt at my best friends' house, I enjoyed them a lot. But then again, as children we didn't have big parties, just a few people I knew. However, when I had my own birthday parties, it started to become more difficult when I invited more (6-7) people instead of 3. When we were less, we could agree on what to do but when we were more, not everybody could agree and we didn't do what I planned and that really stressed me. Nowadays the only parties I go to are at my best friend's house but there are always other friends of hers that I don't know very well. And unless I'm drunk I can't really have fun or talk or even understand what people are saying because i also have spd and audio processing disorder.
parties i really cant do too often, and school cliques are SUPER hard. i dont do sleepovers anymore either. i'm undiagnosed and its hard bc i dont feel valid :(
@@Zara_Beth tysm zara, its hard to get a daignosis bc A, I'm a teenager, B, my state is strict, and C, i'm already diagnosed ADD, so people think it's my ADD masking.
Zara I need help can you give advice on how to become RU-vidr about a disability. Like I’m VI and autistic but I don’t know how to start a channel like how to introduce myself and stuff. Thx from lewis also love your videos btw❤
y’all are getting invited to parties and sleepovers? damn… (for context i’m an autistic person who never gets invited to any kind of social event because i don’t have a lot of friends)
Never went to parties outside of the first 7 1/2 years in Chicago. People just assumed I was a charity case. I suppose they were blessing me in that case because I’ve never had to go to like parties outside of family friends and their potlucks. I hate saying this but parties kind of got out of hand so I suppose I was given a blessing in disguise assumed that I wasn’t going to be interested in them which frankly speaking because I am autistic for once a lot of my peers actually got that correct.
Hi! Weird question but did you go through the NHS or go private for your diagnosis? If you want private, how much did it cost bc I know we are in similar areas so the prices may be similar?
i did a whole video on this a few months ago! ❤ all the info and my experience is in there :) ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-p4COuKWJIGU.htmlsi=qec2YcuHUzLKfjNf
Thank you for this video. I don’t really have nuerodivergent friends. I havnt found them yet maybe one day I will. Im autistic and little undiagnosed me cried at all her parties and stopped having them asap. I’ve been to a few parties scince then but they have been really tiny like less than 10 people but I still wanted to leave :/ I don’t think parties are for me
Loud music during a party really doesn't help the fact that I can't read facial expressions to well😅. I can't hear them but I also can't read their face😭
Does anyone actually enjoy sleepovers? I like my own sleeping space and get self-conscious if I have to share a room with someone at night, let alone a bed. Luckily, my ex-boyfriend understood personal space so after a while of being together, I would sleep in the spare room. We had our own beds, duvets, and couldn’t interrupt each other’s sleeping patterns. (He is a night owl where as I’m just a constantly tired pigeon but set a bedtime for myself.) Sleep is quite a personal and private thing so I don’t understand why anyone would want to be unconscious for hours with others.
Hey there Zara! I know this video is Autism related, but I've got a question about FND and Tourettes. I have tics and lots of other stuff related to FND, for example seizures. I am going to a neurologist next week and plan to say that I suspect I may have FND, but I'm not quite sure what differences do FND tics and Tourettes have. Is it some different feeling or is it the same? I am curious about that because I am a little bit scared that the neurologist might diagnose me with both, and I wont know if I would be alright with that until I know what differences do these tics have (I have OCD so I might be questioning if th eneurologist was right until I know what everything is like exactly). If anyone could answer the question I would be super grateful! If I made any mistakes or some sentences might not be understandable I'm really sorry! Thanks ❤
For me as a kid every birthday party was just planned activities by the parents for 2 hours until I was like 11-12 than the social aspect became much more involved and that’s wen I stoped going. I also stoped celebrating my birthday with friends when I was 10 I had asked my mom for the 2 years before not to have a birthday party I got my wish at age 10. The first time I was at a stereo typical party with loud music and stuff I had a panic attack after 4 minutes and had to ask my stepdad to come pick me up I was 12 they got me a psychologist bla bla bla autism diagnosis bla bla bla
The first time I had a meltdown at a party was when I was nine. Still not officially diagnosed, but that was the first big hint that I might be autistic. I had a lot of those stereotypical autistic behaviors when I was a little kid (I still have most of them, but I'm high-masking, which is probably why I haven't been diagnosed), but my parents think that I'm too smart to be autistic, so I haven't been diagnosed. Six years after that first meltdown, I've had several more of those occasions, and I'm finally getting into therapy for my sensory issues and food aversions. My occupational therapist said that she thinks I'm autistic, and suggested that I see a neuropsychologist, so maybe I'll get diagnosed soon! ❤😊
No one has to answer if they don’t want to but does anyone here have panic attacks if so please can you give me (an autistic 12 year old female) some advice on how to manage them in school or in a stressful situation, I would really appreciate it❤
It’s a heart. She probably doesn’t have time to heart everyone’s comments. Or maybe she forgot. Just because she didn’t heart your comment doesn’t mean she doesn’t apreciate u.
Its not that hard if you manage to control it so yeah, ik this is kinda different but i had Seizure back in Second grade that was like more than 10 years ago but now my Seizure has gone Naturally sounds nuts but it is gone.
If you haven't seen some of her other videos, she actually mentions that she has been officially diagnosed. In the intro, she was referring to the times that she went to parties and sleepovers before she knew she was autistic. And yes, self-diagnosis is completely valid. Many people who haven't been diagnosed as a child and don't self-diagnose their own autism when they're grown never get diagnosed unless their traits are pointed out by other autistic people. There's a big difference between the time and energy that many people who are late-diagnosed autistic take to diagnose themselves and get tested, and the people who joke about being autistic or try to say that they're autistic after watching a couple of TikTok videos about autism. A lot of people who are late-diagnosed autistic believe that self-diagnosis is valid, because they had to diagnose themselves before they could get an official diagnosis ❤😊
There are many visible cuts very often in this. Like almost every sentence, it’s very clear those tics have been edited out, as many people focus on tics rather than the actual topic of the video. Maybe if you thought for a second instead of just assuming disabled people are lying, you’d realise that
Thix is kindzcwhy i have organised every single party and hosted every single sleepover inviting very specific freinds. exept like 2 i have been to until recently when i have been invited to games mights I have also never let people in my room and now do google invites for my neridivernt Christmas freinds ( people i consider close enough thi would invite to Christmas when i can move out ) Edit , my previous freindship group has gone on holiday together it still hurts a bit dispite " cutting them out " ( i left the main group chat because they kept bailing on me ) two years ago
