Live Late Night Chat!? Tom Spills Girlfriend Drama 

Tom, we already knew things were not going like you wanted with your girlfriend and saw you in pain and frustration in some videos. This is not a shock and there is nothing to be embarrassed about. I love how you did the right thing for yourself and family. Shows strength.

My sons dad passed when he was 7. I decided to not date anyone and just focus on my son. Because he just lost the other half of his world. He's gonna be 20 in a couple months and we have a very special bond. I dont regret my decision to just focus on him for a second. Maybe just be happy with your children for now and when it's meant to be it will be. God has perfect timing. May God provide you with peace, strength and comfort while you heal Tom❤

She was deceiving you for three years? She was NOT perfect for you. Or your children.

She is not a good woman. She was stringing you along. If she's living with her baby daddy, then she's also intimate with him. Guaranteed he mistreats her and she was using you as an emotional outlet. How wicked of her to use you like that. She was never going to marry you, even if you moved to be with her. Now we know why she didn't like the idea of your RU-vid channel. She was scared someone might identify her and tip you off to the fact that she was already in a relationship.

When you stop searching so hard, you will meet her organically! I don't believe baby daddy knew anything about you. There is a reason that she did not let you meet her kids,,,,,,, because they would of told daddy. If it was true, that they were not sleeping together, and if she truly loved you.. she would of eased your mind and had you come down to meet her ex to hear it from him. My woman gut tells me that she was living two lives, one with you and the other with her hubby and kids.

Tom I hate to tell you but they're together,she was living a double life

Based on everything you've disclosed - non-committal, deceptive, secretly living with a man with whom she has been intimate - this woman was not in fact "perfect for you" as a Christian man. You dodged a bullet, though you've certainly been grazed. I'm sorry someone wounded you like this. :/ You had better in Andrea and you deserve better now. Please don't settle for less, even if it means being alone - advice from one who settled.

It sounds like she was still married, she led you on. 🎉 Shame on her. Just focus on your children.😊

And stop saying SHE was perfect for you, SHE didn't show you the true HER. This is not your fault!

No, she wasn’t perfect for you. She lied to you and was stringing you along for all those years and months you were together. The perfect woman for you will be totally honest with you from the start and won’t string you along. You are very fortunate to be out of that relationship. It wasn’t realistic, she wasn’t free and available.

You're not running out of time, Tom. I think you had blinders on and should have realized that lady was NOT perfect for you. She was lying to you and never had any intention of leaving her husband. She was playing you and you fell for it. You have to be careful, Tom. You need to remember to "Be still and know that I am God." Please don't let yourself fall into a trap like this again. Enjoy your family, and let the Lord handle this. The right person will be sent to you when the Lord is ready. Stop being impatient, that isn't trusting God with the situation. God wants us to completely trust Him to answer our prayer.

This is just so sad. I had to watch it for a second time. Spend time with your children. They grow up so fast. If God brings you a wife or someone special. Then cherish her like you did Andrea. Spend more time with Eden. She looks so sad in the videos. It breaks my heart that all the kids having to grow up without a Mother.

Tom, as long as I have watched you after Andrea passed, I have seen Andrea’s presence with you. Stop looking for “love” when it is before you all the time. You are a wonderful father and your soulmate is there supporting you. I also lost my soulmate but found that he has not left me. I am filled with love everyday. Fill your life with the family you already have and embrace Andrea, she is the love of your life / soulmate! Take time and turn to what you have and embrace the family you have nurtured. Again, Andrea is there with you…loving you and the kids! Peace to you!!

I have watched your channel for many years but never commented. It seems from the very beginning you have been trying to fill the Andrea size hole in your heart with another. Truly, the only thing that will fill and should fill that emptiness right now is the Lord. Feast on Him. Let Him be your all in all. Let Him heal your brokenness. Give up the relentless control and continual search for another. Truly, truly grieve, heal and ask the Lord to mold you and grow you into who He would like you to be right now without a partner so if in the future someone should come along, you are truly ready in every way to become a husband again.

Maybe you're not meant to be with anyone right now. Maybe you are just supposed to raise your children and be thankful you had a wonderful wife and a one true love. Who knows, the right person might come along one day when you least expect it. Tom, you need someone who needs you just as much.

She was not perfect for you. She lied about a life she was living at home. Once a liar always a liar. Concentrate right now on you and the kids. Heal.

Once upon a time I was in a dark place, I took up cycling and many many prayers, Bible reading, and cycling became my best friend. I hope you get back out on your bike. Trust me it’ll help your mental immensely.🙏❤️

That is how you heal is feeling the pain & working through it with God’s help!

You seemed more present with your kids lately. That’s a good thing. You built a life and you are living it. A divided life is never peaceful. There’s always hope for a better tomorrow. You are loved and needed. You are blessed. God will guide you…❤

Tom.. I am sorry about your breakup. But perhaps God has someone bettet for you. Just continue to focus on your amazing children. I will pray for a true godly woman for you. God bless

I regret not being content with my children, I thought I had to have a husband but my biggest regret is that I didn’t make them my life, you have time yet, for now give those beautiful kids all you’ve got, I hope the best for you❤

If you can survive a death of a spouse. A breakup is nothing to get over. Don’t waste more than one year without seriously discussing marriage with an agreed upon time line.

I am sorry that you are having to go through this. Even though you are hurting, It sounds like she was not the right person for you. God will send you the right person in His time.

One of the first things you say in this live is, "I would never lie". I believe that, so why would you accept someone lying to you? I knew something was off when she stopped showing up in the chats. It was easy to tell it was her by your facial expression when she signed on. I'm in the IT world and would never date anyone that I hadn't fully researched or done a background check on. If so, you would have found out that she shared an address with another man 3yrs ago. Having said that, I know it's hard but why not become active in the church where the kids go to VBS or YG. You don't have to join the church or stop your Bible Studies. If they are a good fit for your kids, more than likely they will be a source of social interaction for you as well. Most of all, be kind to yourself. Godspeed and thank you for your transparency.

You are not dumb, Tom! Everybody wants somebody to love and you deserve a good woman, Tom. She is out there, just give it some time. You will find somebody when you least expect it..best wishes, Tom.

You’re fooling yourself to think they’re not still involved

Time heals all .Im an older lady and you will find your soulmate Tom.You said you were looking for an attractive lady but a normal looking lady Christian and mother type is also ok.Beauty to me is whats on the inside of a person.Take care and you're doing great raising your family.❤

I’m so glad you found out about her before you married. If she was keeping secrets, it would have never worked out. Listen to your heart, if you feel a red flag, there is a reason. No you are NOT dumb. If someone won’t let you meet their kids after that long then yes she is hiding something. Hang in there, God has the perfect person for you and your children. Blessings

Sorry Tom, hugs !! Remember, that there is no time to do with love, you’re never out of time ! Love finds you at any age !

You did the right thingTom. Lying in a relationship is so unfair. You can never trust a liar.

So sorry your heart is broken. You’re a kind, caring man and father. Prayers for you and your family.

“The problem” was she wasn’t honest!! A good Christian woman is honest.Please don’t beat yourself up, she painted a picture that wasn’t “ genuine”. It could’ve happened to anyone.Don’t be embarrassed, PLEASE don’t beat yourself up ,but also don’t make excuses for her.This is all on HER!! God Bless you & your family.

We could tell you wasn't ok tom and we could tell you was struggling with a lot just been praying for you all to be happy again know u can truly focused on your children and your faith

I am so sorry Tom! I certainly understand the pain. Praying for your heart to be healed quickly! God bless you!

Parts of her were perfect for you. That’s the part that hurts. But, in reality, anyone who would deceive you, let alone for over three years, is NOT the right person for you!

You built your home from practically the ground up, i remember watching Andrea's videos on all of your home renovations and your yard work and everything that was done for your children. You made it clear you are staying and she was finicky about leaving. Learning its 100% in or 100% out is so heartbreaking, i have felt it over and over. Its just so hard to leave someone you poured your heart out for! The stress we put ourselves through, and she was in so much stress keeping her secret from you, it seems perfect but the way you are already relieved of that anxiety is so telling. Your mind knows but your heart is blind, i am the same way. Focus on your mind and your faith, you got this Tom

Oh my she was stringing you along, let this be a live and learning experience and move forward. People who lie, are not the ones you want to be with

Tom, my heart is breaking. Do not be embarrassed. It is not your fault for being sincere and giving your heart wholeheartedly. If anything that is admirable. You’re a rare gem and God is sending you a partner and when she arrives all of these experiences will make you cherish her that much more. My prayers are with you. Hang in there ❤

The good of all of this is you are now free to move forward with your life.

Dating long distance for over three years was a really long time for her to have not met your family and you have not met hers. I think that was a red flag right there.

And, no, she wasn't perfect for you. She created herself to be perfect for you, but it was a lie. You have no reason to feel shame. She should be the one who feels shame.

Tom I'm so sorry. Just know that there are others who have dealt with the same kind of pain. Your a great father an person. Stay positive you will find happiness again.

Dear Tom l'm so sorry for you, don't let it get you down, everyone needs love and companionship!!! Keep your eyes and heart open. You're doing a great job raising your kids!!!

Sorry Tom you deserve the best praying Gods peace and will for you and the kids. Prayers and blessings from Melbourne Australia 🙏🙏😊

You did the right thing. And you shouldn't leave the home you built and made for your family. Prayers Tom. You and the children had the best in Andrea. I pray the Lord fills the void.

I’m so sorry you had go thru this, but I belive you did the right thng. Lying about living with another man, babyfather or not is just wrong. You are worth so much more and I’m sure you will find the right one when time is right. ❤️

You will meet your special lady when the time is right. Pray and have faith.God Bless your Beautiful family!!!!🙏❤️

So sorry Tom as the song goes,breaking up is hard to do.And stop saying she was perfect for you she wasn't. I hope your heart heals fast.Just give it some time,time heals all wonds.

So sorry you’re going through this. Why can’t you just be, Tom an amazing, thriving dad of nine great kids? Stop searching and enjoy your self and life. That ONE will come along when you least expect it. Who knows you may be meant to go through this to get to what’s on the other side.

I'm so sorry that things didn't work out for you Tom. You will get through this. Hugs from Indiana.❤

Move on, focus on your children. Apparently she led you on... Too many red flags. She led you on. She was still attached to someone. Strange situation indeed, but that 🤔 situation left too many unanswered questions. It is best to leave. You have beautiful children to raise, and be there when they grow up.❤ Live live life to the fullest. 😊

When you have kids you have to look out for them just as much as yourself. That was a huge lie, and you should have ran the moment you found out. If they lie about something that big, I can’t imagine the other lies she kept from you. You made the best decision for your family by breaking up with her. Your kids do not need a step Mom like that!

Tom it's easy for all of us to give you advice and I think we all knew she was not serious. With that said going forward we all must respect any decision's you make about yourself or the children. We are on the outside looking in and only get a glimpse of what your life is like. Yes we all loved Andrea and she is missed deeply, but we need to respect that she is gone and none of us should be comparing her with anyone. Take the time, regroup and when the time is right start again. Blessings to you always!

New subscriber here. How can a liar be perfect for anyone? Would you want your kids when they are old enough loving a game playing liar...of course not. I went through a lot of lying men until I met my second husband. No games with him thank goodness. We have been together 37 years now. And he is a great stepfather to my two kids. You seem like a nice person so far and I wish the best. 😊

Hi Tom, so sorry for what you're going through don't be hard on yourself ! God Has a better plan His ways are not Our ways His Thoughts are not Ours! The person could just be around where you lived!!! God Has a Wonderful way of working things out!!! You're a wonderful father and Person and have been a wonderful husband and will be again Amen!!!! We all care about Tom Keeping you in my Prayers and Thoughts Gods Blessings To You and Family Hugs Liz .

Please don't beat yourself up. You have been through alot in your life . If you don't take a chance on love, you will never find it. The right woman is out there for you somewhere. Just keep praying about it. You deserve happiness. Praying God comforts you and mends the hurt in your heart soon. May God bless you and your precious family.

Tom it's good you broke up. If she was dishonest in one area she was probably dishonest in other areas. Love blinds a person. I'm sorry, but she said she was just living with him. I doubt that highly, and 3 year and 3 months not having you seeing her kids in that span of time. 🙄🙄🙄 God protected you.

Wow when someone cares about you they don't lie to you sorry this happened to you .

Prayers Tom, may God give you comfort and peace❤️

I'm so sorry 😔❤ please be patient and enduring, when good things come this will just be a memory.

❤ i appreciate your honesty in sharing Tom. I honestly believe her heart wanted a life with you, but if the father wasnt willing for her to have them relocate he could have threatened her with taking custody. I respect her for putting her children first even if it meant losing you. I went through something very similar years ago and stayed in an unhappy marriage for my child. I never got my happy ending but he and i had almost 10 years of a fantasy love that ill cherish forever. Hes passed on now and my child is grown. Its beautiful how you speak of her as perfect for you and that you are head over heels in love with her. Head vs heart is an awful battle.

I'm just throwing some change out here. I have been here with your family for years!!! I have worked full-time as a pediatric psych nurse for over 17 years. Please consider not bringing anyone around your kiddos until Hannah is out of the house. I know it's hard and lonely, but it will save your kids some potential trauma.

Tom, I see your heartache. Many sincere prayers to heal your heart. In time, someone will come into your life to give you the peace you need. God bless you.

As I listen to your pain , I can't help but give thanks that you never decided to uproot and move to her. You most likely saved your kids and yourself a lot of drama! If you had moved to her and THEN found out about her baby daddy, the drama could have been far more devastating! I know that in time this will fade and you will become a stronger person through it all. Take care Tom. You have a kind heart and I hope you find someone that will cherish and appreciate it.

I am very sorry you are going through this. Losing your wife, then having this happen, it's very hard to deal with. I've been alone since 2014. My three kids are adults. Tread carefully when looking for someone to date. Seems our world has gotten crazier and crazier. Sending hugs from Indy

s we both lost our spouces around the same time I truly understand the trama and the wanting to hold on tighter I haven't gotten to that point after 8 years and I still haven't dated I had to find rebuild my self and my life it's not easy tom we will never leave y'all ur family .

Long distance isn't good, it's too hard to come together or for them to move, but hard I guess when you live in a small town. I wish you the best and that your heart heals quickly Tom ❤🙏🏻❤🙏🏻

I believe time to yourself is the key to finding the right one... You need time to heal after a failed relationship. Finding someone right away is usually not good. At least a year should pass before looking for someone else... I lost my husband and I know the feeling. Plus rather you want to admit it or not she was with another man . Doesn't matter if it's baby daddy or whoever. Cheating is what she was doing rather you want to believe it or not... Also no one Loves you if they cheat and obviously lie to you. You believe they weren't together? She was playing you. Sorry to be so blunt. But in time hopefully your realize it.

I'm so sorry to hear this! Secrets are an absolute no! It's deceitful and hurtful. She should have never entered into this relationship in the first place. As a widow, this kind of "grief" absolutely scares me! I can't even imagine feeling that sort of heartbreak ever again!And maybe that's what keeps me single! 😮 chin up Tom, in reality, you dodged a bullet! And I agree! Love is a decision! I really like 2 Chronicles 20:12 when it's so overwhelming and you feel like you don't know what to do you keep your eyes on Jesus! Your not old and it's not over!

Go on some traveling trips with your children, come out east to Michigan and visit some Historial sights. Have fun with your children.😊

Don’t beat yourself up. Take time to be sad and move on. You have overcame much more. You can do it again. You will find someone. I’ve watched your videos for years. You’re a good person.

Tom you had such a wonderful life with Andrea that it's only natural that you crave that now Don't beat yourself up you will find someone worthy of you and your beautiful family Please don't ever think you were dating up noperson in this world is better than the next love yourself and God will help you sending love and respect

This is my perspective on living a life alone after being married for many years in my case 38 years. It's lonely, very lonely. I found that after having that special person that all of life's choices and decisions by myself was difficult. I was married for 38 years and my husband died suddenly and tragically. I had my sons but they were grown and had their own lives. Anyways after being alone for four years, Tom I met my boyfriend at Pizza Hut. I thought you would find that humorous. Anyways, it took time for me to decide to see him. My sons did not take my decision to start seeing him. We have now been together ten years. In those ten years he has been my backbone through me losing my youngest son. Tom, live your life. The right person will come along. I am so sorry that you have had to experience such heart ache and heart break. Never be sorry for tears. I still cry daily for my three sons. It is not a sign of being weak. Just know there are a lot of people who care.

It is easier for Tom to believe her lies than accept the truth.

New girlfreind interviews need to be conducted on a Facebook live so the 500 women can give advice hahah

Just watched this & my heart aches for you. I pray for happiness & a lovely lady in your future. ❤

Hang in there, Tom. I’m so sorry that you got hurt. I’m not here to pass judgement. My only hope is that you will stay close to God. And if you haven’t, I hope that you will get right back to that. He will sustain you.

You were not dumb. Be kind to yourself like I know you would be to another. Yes, come away with lessons learned. You are a good man. You treat your daughters well. You role model what a good man is for your sons. Don’t feel bad for letting your heart hope, that’s a good thing. He still holds your future in his hands.

Not embarrassing it’s life. I dated long distance for over 8 years. I finally realized we were no closer to coming together and even though I was really upset I just pulled the plug. I could dwell on 8 years wasted or just take it as a learning experience. I choose learning. We still are friends. Sending you love , blessings and healing. ❤️❤️

I’m really sorry that you’re going through a lot. Sending lots of prayers and love. Nobody likes to be alone, and everyone wants companionship.

Please stop trying so hard to find someone. You have just come off from a deceptive situation.. Now is not the time to jump into another relationship. You need some peace in your life🙏🏼🩷

The very first time I saw my husband, I knew he was the one God had for me, that we would be married. He was the age that you are now. I was 22 years younger. He had been widowed and had two grown (both married) daughters. It all happened really fast - we spent just parts of 17 days together before we married - because he lived in New Zealand and was merely visiting family who lived near me in the UK. We have been married for 36 years now, We have weathered many storms - cancer being the tough one, but God brought him through. He is now 84, I'll be 62 next birthday. What I am trying to tell you, Tom, is that God has a perfect plan for you but it has to be in His timing. When it is, everything that is needed will just slip into place. You won't have any struggles or difficulties, because doors will open, even when it seems impossible. I understand how hard this must be for you - and I can hear the pain you feel - give it time, God is still working on you! You're not finished with yet - He IS the ultimate perfectionist - you're merely in training! Take care and keep looking to Him, He won't let you down. And remember the hymn: All your anxieties, all your cares, Bring to the Mercy Seat, leave them there, Never a burden He cannot bear, Never a Friend like Jesus. Sending hugs xx

She does not sound perfect for you at all. Not the same values & lifestyle. I imagine there is a lot you didn't know.

In do time this incident will be long forgotten, you will be moving forward. Continue on be interested in your children's lives. Who knows you may run across a woman who is slightly older and and more well mannered, and secured. Your Children are beautiful, and well adjusted.😊❤

Thank God it all came out in the open. A relationship based on lies is not one to base a marriage on. You say she was not playing you but she was. I pray that you will find a good, virtuous, Christian wife from the Lord. Christianity is lived in word and deed. She gave you all the red flags and I am glad you have got out largely unscathed. God has actually saved you from a lot of trouble further down the road by showing you why you should NOT be with her.

Tom so sorry to hear about what happened. May God fill you with peace. All things work together for good for those who love God. Don’t be anxious to find someone. One door closes and another one opens. Many prayers for you Tom🙏🏻✝️✝️🙏🏻

I’m so sorry Tom, I get the heartbreak. Praying that when the time is right god will bring you the person that is meant to be in your life. Take time to heal and recover ❤ I no loneliness is really hard. It’s all going to be alright.

It is Monday morning and I woke up to this video. Oh Tom, I'm so sorry - I don't know what else to say😢 apart from i'm praying for you xx

I only found your channel through Jamerill Stewart and found about Andrea etc. I know both you and Jamerill are going through a hard times at the moment and I know the Lord has everything in his hands. All I know in my walk with the Lord that he is consistent and I never gave up on my Faith and the Lord always lets us to do U Turns. You are an amazing Father and doing your best for all of them. Praying for you and the family and the Lord will bring the right person too you in his time.

I’m so sorry Tom❣️you don’t have to be sorry or embarrassed❣️we love you, you are our Friend❣️🤗🌹I would love to give you a big hug🤗everything will be ok and you will find the one❣️🤗🌹🏡💕we are here for you❣️🤗🫶💐we will always be here for you❣️🤗🫶🌹💐🌸🌺🙏✝️🕊️

Why does the lady you meet need to move? Why don't you move? If she has kids. She is in the same situation than you are. If you are not willing to move, you will have a very hard time to find a spouse.

Tom! My heart breaks for you! Truly! I cried when I saw you tear up. I would not want to know or find out who she is. What I do want is for you to settle down once again and be so very happy for the rest of your life. You are a sweet man.

Sorry things didn’t work out. I’m in uk and single mum and have mindset if someone is out there for me it will happen naturally. Have a break and don’t go looking for love for a while x ❤

You and your beautiful family are always in my Thoughts and in my Prayers too 🙏🏼 ❤️ I love all of your guys videos too . Tom just keep being awesome and amazing Father to your kids and Tom keep your head up. ❤

I’m sorry you are going through this, sounds like you and she genuinely care cared deeply for each other, and still do in some ways. Life situations are so complicated once we have children, and established our lives , careers, etc. I sound really selfish saying this but I was worried that your channel would change if you remarried. Thank you for being so transparent !

Like others said, the perfect person might come along when you least expect it. I feel that searching hard will only yield results of all the wrong people.

You will be in my prayers, Tom. You are such a blessing.

Your not dumb Tom . Your grieving and your lonely from loosing a part of your life your other half . Take gentle care of your heart you will get through this .❤

I would suggest you switch your priorities as far as woman go. Beauty is skin deep and we all age no one is escaping that.

So sorry to hear this. 😢 Praying you meet someone perfect for you ♥️