Random Live Chat! 

Your kids have been through a lot of trauma. Maybe it’s best to hang up dating for a little while. It’s clear you’re lonely, but it’s coming off as desperate, which prospective dating partners pick up on and it turns off quality people and attracts people who are not in it for the right reasons. In the meantime your kids ride the rollercoaster of dating emotions with you - the highs and the lows- and it’s just too much. Two cents from an internet stranger.

If she and the children’s father were all living together with the children, she isn’t really a single mother is she?

That's just weird that you never met her kids in 3 years, and she was planning to marry you. I think there were more issues with her than you are willing to admit.

If she was truly interested in marrying you and moving your way, she would have definitely visited to see what she was walking into! Seems like it was really one-sided, if you visited 6 times and she never once came your way! Red flag there!

I think that you are looking and trying too hard to find a new wife. You keep saying that being alone is not for you but you have to trust God’s plan. If it is His plan for you to be alone then that is what should be. Use this time to focus on your family, home projects and yourself. God is pointing you in that direction.

A relationship based on a lie is not a good relationship 😞

From someone whose 30+ year marriage ended in 2020 (not by my choice), you must find happiness for yourself and within yourself before a relationship will work. Trust God and allow Him to heal you before you look for a relationship with another. Find joy in who you are through Him and enjoy time with yourself for yourself. I've learned that I'm not in a rush to marry or even date. I'm finding joy in God and His plan for me. I don't think any relationship will work for me until I am ready. He is providing me with peace and comfort through His word and His promises. I trust He will do the same for you. Best.

Tom. I have silently watched your family for years. What a beautiful story that has not yet ended. We grieve those we lose but the wonderful memories we have of them is with us forever. Andrea would want you to be happy and companionship for you is part of that. You and Andrea did a great job raising your kids together and you have continued doing this. You can tell by seeing how they react to you and each other. Watching them play that video game together brought tears of joy to my eyes. Be happy, keep your sense of humor and you will find love again.

Tom, if she cannot leave the man who has fathered her children, and they are in fact living in the same house, of course they are having sex, that's yet another lie from her! Don't be naive please Tom!

Your children are so precious.😊

My son was devastated when he went thru a break up. He thought he would never find anyone again. Fast forward a year, he is so happy to have found a girl that is a much better fit. They are happy to have found each other. They are planning a life together. Be patient, God’s timing is always correct…❤

Hi Tom, glad to see you on here tonight. Keep smiling your strong and can get through this another tough time: 😊

Hello. I lived in a small PA town for 37 years. I met the man of my dreams from Tx. I moved my 3 children to Texas, we were married 6 weeks later. We have been happily married 25 years this year! Best thing I did and the kids will all agree! We can’t live in fear! God may have a plan that we don’t know about!! Hugs to yall!

I'm sorry but I have to point out that you don't know that they weren't together. You didn't know she was still living with him, and it's very unusual that more secrets wouldn't show themselves as time passes. Why couldn't she leave her home if she didn't have a tie to her baby daddy. If he's abusive, take her and her children and rescue them. But I think you like being blind to the truth that she was 100% still in a relationship with her BD.

When you find the right one, you will be so thankful this one didn’t work out🌸

So sorry Tom. You seem to find people quickly, when your heart is open. Hopefully, you’ll be able to put her behind you. I just can’t help but thinking about the man she shares her home and children with. Cooking his meals, cleaning his home, washing his clothes, celebrating holidays with both their families, laughing and enjoying their children together…, planning a future and making a home together… a home neither you or the children were welcome. A woman doesn’t stay with a man whose making her miserable… when she has an adoring man on the side promising her a happy and secure life, for her and her children. You and the kids would have enriched her life tremendously. It doesn’t make sense. These are painful truths you need to embrace to truly move forward. I pray you’re able to truly move past this… but, continuing to tell yourself she’s perfect for you, making excuses for her, fantasizing she will show up, after your serious ultimatum. it will be hard for a new woman to jump in… when you are still pining for someone else. I’ll pray for your heart to move on and be open for someone new and available to you and the kids. Not being mean, but, being objective from the 30k view. Much love and best wishes to you Tom! Btw… 37 is not that young… think of Andrea at 37… a 37 yo shouldn’t get a pass for being immature due to age.

I certainly can relate. God Bless You and yours amen! You are a amazing father.

Love your videos. The children are growing so fast. They are precious!

Hi Tom❣️so nice to see you❣️🫶🤗💐🌹🙏✝️🕊️🌸🌺

I agree with your perpective on love - its a choice and you can love anyone.

Andrea would want the best version of her Husband. She knew you were not meant to be alone. She knew there were multiple reasons you would move on. I believe she would have wanted her beautiful children to have the positive influence like a mother for her children. I think these years without her and your experience with dating WAS the grieving process. You have learned she is irreplaceable (you knew) you have learned how to be a mom and a father to your children. You have learned you want your children to have both. I believe these stages of you dating have been your actual stages of grief. You have had Anger,betrayal,disbelief, bargaining, shock. All at different times. And probably not in the traditional order. I think this last relationship has brought you full circle. Instead of a happy ending it’s like your grief process has started over which is God telling you it is time for a new Journey. There is no ending to your marriage with Andrea but there is a new beginning to Tom. I know this sounds like word salad. I have a bad brain condition but I have been grieving with you. Then and now. It is just my strong belief your second act is only just beginning . It’s not 5 women and 5 breakups. It’s 5 lessons and you have learned. It’s time for the surviving to end and the thriving to begin. I don’t know why but my spirit just tells me this. I’m just a stranger to you but you are a valued friend to me. As was Andrea. Begin again Tom. Turn your world upside down, I think you will find her in the strangest of circumstances. ❤

But she lied to you for 3 years. She is not for you. You can't really trust anyone like that she would be probably doing it again. It's not good for your children. It's good before you married her. You will find someone someday if God wants that for you and your children. Remember you have a beautiful family

Tom I’m hugging you with my heart. You are a true spirit. Be careful with your heart. Love all your babies and love yourself.

Something has really disturbed me that Tom said more than once last night. It went right through my heart & soul. I am older than Tom & never married. I was blessed with the most wonderful home, parents & christian upbringing imaginable. The envy of so many people & also the fact how extremely close we were & something unfortunately they had never experienced.Also blessed with other very special people & friends. Unfortunately my circle of people has now closed mainly through death, serious illnesses, & moving away. I am earnestly praying for a family or companion in my life again . There is absolutely nothing wrong with anyone not getting married young & does not mean they have " ISSUES" or something wrong with them that is concerning. I take offense to those throughts & comments its untrue. The truth is its just the opposite. We are the people who are the greatest & most stable catches & ones to seek. There is no baggage or issues & problems including ( some other people who could be trouble) that come with those who have been married before. It doesn't mean either that unmarried single people do not know about love either & most of the time give their all above & beyond with no hesitation or hindrances in the relationship that those who have married before likely have. Its the unmarried single people who are the greatest catches & should not be overlooked. Why haven't they married earlier in life? Could be for a number of reasons but nothing at all bad or means there were problems or issues with them. Its the greatest of advantages.

🎉😂🎉 love your children😅

I'm so sorry you are dealing with the heartbreak, but the one for you will be transparent with you! I became a single Mom of two at 26 years old. I wanted SO much to marry again and have a large family, but after 25 years, I'm still waiting, but I'm hopeful...I truly wish the best for and your family!!!

Tom, you have good insight.

You are an interesting man to listen to. Thank you!

Hey there Tom, I admire you and your family so very much. I stay up in the bushes- seldom comment but watch you always. I think you are just an amazing man. It's wonderful that you have core values and want your children to have roots. 🥰🤗 I wish you the best and know you will be happy again one day. I have questions that are none of my business so I will pray that you find happiness and someone you can share your life with. I need to add one more thing....You always focus on your kids and you always will IMO. Many of us need a partner to share and do adult things with. 🙂

I'm glad you're having a better evening. The evenings and nights are the worst when going through a breakup. The color blue is definitely your color. I would love to move to Wyoming, but my husband doesn't want to because he says it's too windy. Meanwhile, we live in Alaska with ice, snow and darkness; I'll take the windy days every day😅. I would set you up with my sister but she is mean...even though she is my best friend. It would be a blast to be the aunt to all your kids.😊

I'm currently watching Countdown to Christmas 2 from 7 years ago. What a wonderful family you were with beautiful Andrea and tragically how she was taken away from you only a few years later. I love hearing her voice & seeing her interacting with you & the kiddos. I'm so sorry that you had to go through such sad times.

Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family

You sure got lots of advice in the comments and I know it’s because they love you and your kids, Tom. I hope you can heal because it just sucks to feel the heartache. I will pray that your heart heals. Sending a virtual hug. ❤️🇨🇦🙏

Maybe a small Christian school for Solly and Sophia would be a better fit instead of public school and Hannah would thrive in public school.

You need to put that woman behind you. Mourn the loss of your dream for that relationship but realise that it was not the right person for you. You will meet the right person when the time is right. I moved over a thousand kilometres to marry my husband and never thought twice about it. I knew he was the one for me and I went all in for the relationship. We’ve been very happily married for over 22 years now. 😊

I would recommend a good therapist to talk through these issues. God does place in times of aloneness. This is when we draw nearer to God and learn to trust Him more. I am there right now. Welcome to the oasis of His love.

Tom, I have been with you all since Andrea's terible sickness and passing. What a heartache for you and children to endure. As one who also endured loss, pls dont rush out looking for someone. Dating sites need to be deleted, if I may be blunt. Put the brakes on the looking part, be open, but concentrate on kids. God will send you the right person but He can't if you keep stepping in trying to take over the steering wheel.His timing is not ours. Praying for healing and a helpmate. Take good care, Paige

I Love You and Your Family. It will take a special person. To take on Your Beautiful Children and Family. It really will. Hopefully You will have that person.

Dang, i missed another live. You look great in that blue. Yes i believe that love is a decision you make.

Starting over later in life is definitely hard. (I’m46) After 21 yrs my husband decided one day to just up and leave myself and our two boys. No reasoning..just he was done. He’s now been with a mutual friends ,ex wife and her 3 kids. I wish you the very best. You shall be blessed with a new forever love when the time is right.

You are hurting Tom and we can all see that. Spend all your time with your kids to help heal your hurt xx

If I were not married, I would be there in a heartbeat

Give the ring to Eden..it is gorgeous

A true "Christian " person wouldn't lie like that.

Good morning from uk x

We love you Tom❤🎉

Hi Tom. I'm a long-time subscriber to this channel. Even though I really didn't have a lot in common with Andrea, I just loved watching your beautiful family. I think she was an amazing person. My husband of 40 years died in December 2022. I am so scared to get out there and date. I had a really great guy for a big part of my life. Nice guys are hard to find. I might fall in love with a bad guy, and that would be terrible. I think you are brave for putting yourself out there. God has a plan, but maybe part of the plan is for you to find someone. I hope so. You are a smart man who knows how the world works. Keep your faith and it will happen.

You are so respectful when you talk about your ex girlfriends..the way you put it was very kind.

I enjoyed your video! I’ve been a subscriber for a long time but don’t always get time to sit and watch, but I try!! I feel like you would be great to sit with coffee and chat!

Tom , It can be hard to blend two families. Plus, when you live in different states. Sorry you are going through this season in your life. Lean on God, he will guide you!

I suppose it was hard and you were very intrigued to wanna be in this relationship. She was younger than you in your own words Hot, I know every man wants to have somebody good looking on their arms to make them feel good but sometimes you have to look into someone’s heart and find the beauty look. Don’t keep a relationship, love and respect and honesty does.🙏

Tom, on the note of a mini vacation, you guys should check out the new trampoline park two hours south! Your kids would absolutely love it.

Remain strong!

Keep trying, you will meet someone else who will be just what you want and need. I am 55 yrs old and single. I am not dating because I never leave my house lol... I guess for me he will have to knock on my door lol😅

Hello Mr Mills

Hi Tom!!

I hope your heart heals

A lady who has brains is attractive. Lots of ladies on here with this quality

Good evening. What are doing up so late?😊

im sorry Tom im praying

HY u how was your day other then praying for you grief and sadness for what you thought your future plans keep the faith Jesus brings the right people things in his time glad to have u back tom even tho ur really sad let down.

🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗💕

God can help you though it pray that keep talking with her and love one another ❤

Tom I wasn’t feeling good so I was lying in bed and was scrolling thru RU-vid and I came across this video you made. I am so sorry to see the pain you are in. Please know that ppl suffer everyday with all kinds of things. Grief is not something we were supposed to endure. Jesus will comfort you always. Keep looking to Him for all your needs. May you know His love fully and His peace that passes all understanding. God be with you at this time. Please focus on healing completely with the Lord before you look to anyone else. God bless you and your children. Prayers for all. 🙏🏻✝️

Tom, you mentioned that you belong to some Widows Groups. May I ask if you would share what platform that is on? I have been a widow for 10 yrs. now and realize that I really need to join a few groups and get all of the flood of feelings out there now. I know you think 10 yrs. is way too late. And I do too. Thank you for sharing all of these very private and intimate feelings with all of us. I have an enormous hole in my heart and think it's time to start working on that. Peace and Blessings to you and your lovely family

It my life ND I can cry about if I want tooo Im here with u

It’s learning to forget … yes ,

Ask that lady who you have in mind that you mentioned in this video.

HI TOM

Hi

I took the same personality test and came up as an infp, interesting you said many of your viewers are infj's.

❤

Did the personality test. Came out as ISFJ. Need to look up more about it, see if it’s me

Speaking of teamwork games have you ever tried Keep talking and nobody explodes with the older kids? Might also be a fun teamwork game

Hey Tom! How’s Thomas doing? Living on his own, ok?

I also want to say Tom... ( sorry watching this over the last few days while I do things ) Andrea is working with God and she is picking out someone special. It will cross paths.

Tom, you will find the right person someday.Your children are your treasures & you are one great DAD!!! ❤

Sounds like my Aunt & Uncle ( my mom’s oldest sister & Husband). She passed away from a cardiac arrest & my uncle barely lasted a month he missed her so much , he passed away they were an older couple , but still sad.

Lol on that one So right God will lead you to the right one

It will take time God will help you find the right one just hold in there

Hello

The Calgary stampede is the biggest rodeo in the world. It began in 1912 and many people come from all over the world.

You’re so open, I hate when people are careless asking insensitive questions. Hope today is a better day for you Tom!

Be very careful with progestogen cream. Only take it after ovulation. A doctor told me to take it through out my my cycle and now i havent ovulated since and I stopped a year ago

A friend of mine lost his wife (my best friend) and he was dating and chose his wife 5 months later. They married a later after his wife’s death. It was VERY difficult for me to accept thinking it was too soon. My sister also dated her now husband within 6 months after her late husband’s death. Oddly enough I was ok with that.

Good don't tell us who she was. I absolutely respect that. Very wise

My heart is heavy for you Tom, I can see how this break up is affecting you. I will continue to pray for you ❤️💕🙏🏼 I am a long time subscriber of Andrea’s, I considered her a true friend and I sorely miss her. She helped me alot with some health issues I was having (homeopathic wise) and I’ll be forever grateful for it. She also was quick to help me with any questions I had about sewing (and I had many 😭😅) my uncle died just days before Andrea, 5 years ago next month… very similar circumstances… but my uncles cancer was pancreatic… from diagnosis until death, it was just 5 days. Also like Andrea, he had been having some pretty bad back pain, but he was 79 and thought he had just hurt himself working in the yard… Since Andrea passed away I haven’t been very good about commenting, I don’t know why really… I guess maybe it just made me to sad. But I love your shopping videos and I faithfully watch each one and give a thumbs up. I’ll try and participate and comment more from now on ❤️💕🙏🏼 Sending love to you all from Oregon 🌲🌲❤️~Miss Trina~

i just took test infj lol

Join a singles group too. It can't hurt and there have to be some in WY. You need to do some casual dating without the purpose of finding a new partner. Just having someone to have dinner with or go to a movie. etc.

I’m sorry you’re having a hard time. How did your children get along with this person? I feel like my own mother was right where a man and a woman can’t live together without some kind of relation going on…. It wouldn’t work for me. Best bet to find a match - bbqs with family and friends .

Nothing wrong at all dating someone straight after your spouse dies. I say do it. It helps you get over your heartache

I love small towns our population is 800 moved fr the city about 10 ys ago and would never go back to a big city

Phil Wickham-Battle Belongs (on RU-vid)

I know what it is like to be in a Marriage where their were lies in a relationship and the fact that my ex-husband abused my Son yet he was meant to be a Christian. He is now in Prison after my Son gave evidence against his Dad. He was 14 years older than me. My Son is amazing even though he has autism, dyslexia and dyspraxia and he loves the Lord with his Simple Faith he knows the Lord is with him.

Have you gone no contact with her? Asking bc I did this and we talk every other day and it's so toxic DO NOT fall into that habit of oh we just talk about our day.

This one taught you...don't do long distance. Don't let it drag on I guess

Long distance sucks.. just someone nearby is the best who doesn't have a criminal record and has a university degree or higher. Age doesn't matter

If it's not going to work it just won't it's hard then reality hits and then ur Brocken pieces leNbon us and Jesus we never leave u

Moving to her is NOT the answer. Anyone who would hold back what she did is not the woman of God you would want to be with for life. I think your heart is deceiving you.

Don't rule out an older woman. Most women my age would have the flexibility to move since the kids would be out of the house. Otherwise, you might forever be plagued with custody issues with the father (if the woman is not local. ) Most fathers would not want their kids moving to a remote location where bio dad wouldn't have many job opportunities (if he was to be willing to move to be closer to his kids. ) And don't worry about the woman dying first. We typically outlive men by 7 years. And as you saw, anyone can die at any time!