Love or Control.?? 

I know a lot of us think love is combined with hurt & hitting and punishments.
👉That's exactly why a lot of this generation who were raised by authoritarian or toxic parents got into similar relationships with their lovers or married partners too. Because abuse was normalised in our families.
👉Because After all the hitting and thrashing, there will be a hug & a kiss and a regretful statement that it was all for your good & it was because they loved you.
Well no.
Love doesn't hurt.
Love will not abuse.
Love does not punish.
Love will not manipulate.
Love won't make you feel unsafe
Love won't make you feel unworthy.
Love will not disrespect.
Love doesn't traumatise.
Love doesn't control.
👉We have to stop normalising abuse in parenting not just for parents to treat children better. But for people to understand the difference between genuine love and control so that they get into the right relationships. So that they understand red flags better. So that they know their safety, respect and growth is what matters and they must never agree to whatever disturbs their peace & happiness.
👉If you were a child that was abused, hit or tormented,i wish to tell you this.
💓You didn't have to be whacked for someone to show love to you.
💓You didn't have to be punished just because you were being a child & did normal child stuff.
💓You didn't have to live in fear in your own house where ideally you had to feel safe & cared for.
💓You didn't deserve any of that shit.
💓You deserve all the love in the world.
And NOT controlling love, but free love.
❤️Free love that doesn't pull you down & hold you tight.
💜But free love that let's you fly and still helps you connect with people.
I really wish you find such genuine connections despite the horrible childhood or adolescence you had. 😍❤️