"Luke, did I ever tell you about the lego sets that went missing from the Jedi temple? For months younglings legos were going missing without a trace, including my Venator Class Republic Attack Cruiser™ and Mace Windu's Captain Rex™ Y-Wing™ Microfighter. It got so bad Ki Adi Mundi stopped asking "what about the droid attack on the wookies?" and instead sulked around the Jedi temple with tears in his eyes, grabbing onto the cloak of every nearby Jedi and crying "what about my Ambush on Mandalore™ Battle Pack?". Eventually the council put me on assignment to track down the lego larcenist. After months of wild bantha chases we finally found the culprit. As it turned out around that time the entire council had had their routine doctor's visits. And when the tests came back it was revealed every male testicle on the Jedi council contained microplastics. Anyway, Master Yoda was convinced they were a conduit through which Jedi could tap into the force and so unbeknownst to everyone he had been eating all of the legos in the Jedi temple. He had even used his Jedi Master clearance codes to open the secret emergency lego storage compartments to feed them to his son Grogu in hopes that the 50 year old baby would start talking. In the end there was nothing any of us could do since that senile old frog was grandmaster of the Jedi order. Eventually we were able to stop him thanks to waste management and the local authorities. You see, Yoda kept sending Yarell Poof for takeout every six hours or so to get his fix. He would dump the food out the window of the Jedi temple and then eat the styrofoam containers, bags, and plastic ware. With the massive waste hazard outside the Jedi temple chancellor Palpatine noticed the mess and got the senate to pass a bill to change all restaurant takeout items to be biodegradable. Unfortunately, Palpatine slipped a provision in the bill that allowed him to execute order 66 if Master Yoda ate another single piece of plastic. Which eventually of course he did, he ate chancellor Palpatine's lego death star™ and doomed the entire Jedi order.
Shoutout to @SuperCountDooku and @aquarius475 for the gifted memberships this month! and To @jessica_wi for being mesa first member
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28 май 2024
