Many men are making this mistake when picking a woman and committing to a long term relationship

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Welcome to my youtube page and 5th video in which I talk about a mistake men are making in committing to a long term relationship with the wrong person; what is it and how it can be avoided. Stick around till the end, it will be worth it.

Опубликовано:

30 сен 2024

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Комментарии : 592

@lukerestlessstudios Год назад

If she ever suggests that you don’t quite meet her standards, or that she’s unsure about you, or if she acts like she’s doing you a favor by dating you: believe her, and make the decision for her.

@lockyp204 11 месяцев назад

👍

@samsunggalaxyj3prime889 8 месяцев назад

True dat

@StevenThomas-mz8lb 7 месяцев назад

Yes that’s a sign she is playing with several men online and possibly meeting in person dating also, she is shopping and man hopping 😅

@bwake Год назад

The biggest mistake a man can make is committing to a woman who doesn’t actually like him. Too many men think that if they have a sexual relationship, she likes him.

@c1w2e3g4n5e6r Год назад

yes 100% I made this mistake. The best choice is to just not get married.

@catsnchords Год назад

When did you realize your ex didn't like you? What early signs did you miss? @@c1w2e3g4n5e6r

@kerryfoster1 Год назад

Sex is just having the 'hots' for someone. You don't need to like them. It's just chemistry. Nice if its more, but not necessary!

@stephanie7572 Год назад

She may like him at first but outside influences like her family, her girlfriends, etc. may influence her against him so that in the long run she doesn't like him.

@mrsherwood2599 Год назад

Men have been conditioned to believe that women equate sex with love. Oops.

@scottcoley1906 Год назад

I had a girlfriend who wanted to make things more serious, so I tested whether we could be more than just fw benefits. I asked her to come keep me company and help me get out of bed after I had a major surgery. And she was totally icked out by me being in a vulnerable state and not able to get up by myself. It was freaking her out so I said she could leave if she wanted and she did. Her lack of empathy and compassion told me all I needed to know. She was totally unable to care for me while I healed so I called another girl who was and we ended up dating for a while. She took great care of me and it didn't work out because of our career paths but she's making a great wife to the man she's with now.

@agentnukaz1715 8 месяцев назад

I don't understand why some women react that way. It's disgusting and I doubt they will ever be able to stay in a relationship.

@ankra12 8 месяцев назад

Then she is defenetly not a keeper.

@richardcasey7521 8 месяцев назад

Valid test.

@jdobbs7700 7 месяцев назад

I got divorced after 21 years. In retirement now and this is so true. When my father died after a year long ordeal with cancer. I admired how my mother helped him in his final year. If this woman couldn't help her boyfriend recover after his surgery...he really did the right thing by ending the relationship.

@davidsisson2026 7 месяцев назад

I had something similar I wasn't faking it. She bugged out. But that was the best part of it.

@patrickmurphy631 Год назад

Expectation is the mother of frustration. Our marriage really went 'next level' when we both finally learned to enjoy what IS instead of what we thought should be.

@TerreHauteRemoteGoat Год назад

"the absence of everyday kindness" yeah, that rings true

@aidancampbell5644 Год назад

This makes me think of two quotes, pretty sure both were from novels by David Gemmel. They do contradict each other. “A woman marries a man assuming that he will change, but he doesn’t. A man marries a woman assuming she won’t change from the woman he fell in love with, but she does.” “A woman falls in love with a man because he is different from all the other guys out there. He’s unique and she loves him for it. Once they are married, she tries to change things about him so he becomes more of what she is comfortable with… invariably she succeeds. He changes because he loves her and wants her to be happy. She spends the rest of their marriage nagging about what a boring conformist he is and whining about how he’s not the man that she married.”

@gregm8522 6 месяцев назад

The first quote originates with Albert Einstein, who was a keen observer of human behavior. What he said is a little different though. It goes pretty much like this: A woman marries a man hoping he’ll change. A man marries a woman hoping she won’t. Ultimately both are disappointed.

@aidancampbell5644 6 месяцев назад

@@gregm8522 i never knew it was Einstein. I read it in a novel when I was 14, and I am now 43 and I have seen it proven accurate so many times.

@genelewis2481 Месяц назад

The woman often will feel disgust and resentment for a man that doesn’t stay true to his identity. Even if the change was at her behest! It isn’t even a conscious decision.

@233kosta Год назад

Unrealistic expectations: 1. A woman who isn't full of herself 2. A woman who will treat me like a human 3. A woman who will judge me on MY actions, not other people's 4. A woman who won't go back on her word the microsecond it suits her 5. An actually feminine woman 6. A woman who wants me to be *only* hers, and is ready to be only mine

@fenixauditore6589 Год назад

Couldn't said it better

@MHLivestreams Год назад

In 2023 it really is unreasonable. Women have ruined their prospects, and future generations, all for a selfish delusion.

@richburley5670 Год назад

Yep, speaking of "unreal" expectations. Sadly, very few women would meet your criteria...

@233kosta Год назад

@@richburley5670 I'm inclined to go with none at all. Also could have phrased 6 more clearly

@jimsanderson4180 Год назад

You just described 80% of the women I know. If you can’t find them you are looking in the wrong places.

@kurtbaier6122 Год назад

Been married almost 46 years. First 20 was a rollercoaster. When she decided to be my friend and not my boss it got better and better. I married a very capable person. I couldn’t marry a person that needed to be micromanaged. But she had to learn that sometimes she had to be held accountable if our partnership was going to work. Marriage is a 200% commitment from each partner each day. The fact is, there is no such thing as pulling your fare share. Sometimes it’s up to you to make things work and get through the day or night. Rocked my infants at night after working all day so my exhausted wife could get some rest. Led by example when getting my kids to do chores. We are just human. Some days we struggle. We are times sad, frustrated, tired, disappointed, or sick. Worse thing you can do is to see the other person as a machine, expecting them to keep cranking out your desired results. We learned that every disagreement is not a life or death issue, nor does it have to be solved right away. Instead of complaining why don’t you … we eventually realized that was the only way each of us could manage to do it, so we started helping with each other’s deficits by coming along side each other to help make the task and life easier. We also started thanking each other a lot more and flirting each day. We also learned that expectations, of either yourself or your partner is poison. As well as your thinking that your partner was expecting something of you, when that was not the case at all. And learned to say what we need and to say what we would like, with the understanding that our spouse may not be able to meet that at that particular time. We found that assuming what our partner needed or would like was off more times than not. And we started making each other a priority. We would carve out time even if minutes a day to ask each other what’s been going on, or about the next day, and what’s been on each other’s minds. Which was not always easy with juggling jobs, kids, and now grandchildren. And tried to go on lunch dates whenever we could and take more overnight trips rather than just looking forward to one long vacation.. I met her when she was 18. We started dating when she was 19. I was 23 and she was 21 when we married. She is the best part of my life and I make sure she knows it. My heart goes out to folks who couldn’t make their relationship or marriage work. Those first 20 years were really good and really bad. I’m glad things are looking up for you and about your being pregnant. I wish you the very best.

@serenityinside1 Год назад

Great piece - very genuine and sage 👏

@silverhetch3383 11 месяцев назад

thank you sharing this with us Chief :D

@khalaq2 3 месяца назад

Well said.

@kevinfurr3311 Год назад

25 years down the road from a divorce and you just walked across every single one that was real. Almost made me cry hearing this and being punished to do so,but its all good being down the road. I saw these things especially in retrospect and its all prohibited me from ever considering doing it again. These truly are words of wisdom from you, Emily, for people to consider on the front end. Thanks, you are doing a great service.

@theromulanwarhawk Год назад

When I see what the dating world has become, I am so grateful for my wife. If I had to do it all over again, I'd probably stay single and alone. If I break that, then I figure that as a man, you give back what she gives out. I match what she puts out, so she decides how I'm going to treat her. Next, ladies, if all you're bringing to the table is a pretty face and a hot body, go sit at another table. Especially if you want Platinum-Plus treatment out of me but you're only putting out "trial membership" energy.

@lamastu2156 Год назад

No you don't. Because if you really was then you'll not going to follow videos about dating advices. I'm single now but when I was in relationship I was not spending my time to learn how is the date today. I was focus to my relationship even it didn't goes like I wanted. So or you want to cheat and you regret who means that you don't respect your wife, or you are just liar, you probably you're single and you try to boost your ego with a fake comment in RU-vid

@alejandrodominguez7211 Год назад

@@lamastu2156 your life sounds amazing

@Ellie_the_artic_fox Год назад

Every time I watch a video like this I grow to appreciate my girlfriend and our relationship more and more.

@Luke_wait_for_it_marengo Год назад

Well done sir

@joseph244 Год назад

That’s wonderful! OR, the feeling that you are in a relationship to the wrong person.

@johnlanier3616 Год назад

Congratulations

@eQuariuz Год назад

How long together? How long exclusively together?

@IGIG-m4u Год назад

Only women who have unattractive faces tend to not have unrealistic expectations. Possibly because they were not treated like a queen by everybody when growing up. So whenever an ugly faced woman has unrealistic expectations, I’ll know one or both her parents treated her like a queen without merit when growing up. My major point here is: men tend to treat their daughters like queens, then their daughters create unrealistic expectations like that their adult life should continue to be a Disney princess character. Because that’s all they were taught in how to interact with the world. Where every person has to serve her and she serves nobody or minimally in return. Ironic, how men want someone’s adult daughter to not have unrealistic expectations. Yet the same men will raise their adult daughters to have unrealistic expectations. Feeding the cycle of producing unrealistic women into the population. Doesn’t mean men should treat their daughters horribly. It just means to focus on raising a grateful or gratitude giving daughter. That way a good man will want to marry and stay married to your daughter. Otherwise, she’ll get played and ran through for having unrealistic expectations by men who can’t stand her, so they decide to play her.

@raydenn6027 Год назад

I find Emily to be a wonderful breath of fresh air. She is seeking to help men and women to form positive correctly functioning relationships. In particular I love how she is breaking down negative male stereotypes,

@CraigGrant-sh3in Месяц назад

Only men are listening. The irony. Women say men don't listen.

@jcransome5616 Год назад

the mistake We are making is....NOT HAVING ANY CHOICE or even prospects

@JJ-vp3bd Год назад

how do you get choice

@jcransome5616 Год назад

@@JJ-vp3bd have matches. Lots of them

@vincelorino4394 Год назад

That whole part of the beginning where you were talking about how the guys are putting in all of the effort and the women's just kind of sit there until they finally feel like reciprocation? That's why 50% of available men in a span of only 3 years have given up dating entirely.

@fkscopes Год назад

Also women rate 80% of men as unattractive, who wants to be with someone who doesn't find them attractive (little to no bedroom action etc). I know a lot of guys who do just put up with it anyway though....

@davidgleeson1716 Год назад

Get a dog instead. Save your money and your heart. If you can ever find a woman who loves you as much as your dog does, then you might have a keeper. Until then, enjoy the peace and tranquility of living a life alone. 😊

@MrErchman Год назад

I think our divorce is because of unrealistic expectations on my part. Although in my defense I was upfront in the beginning that I wanted to start a family. It was only after 18 months (after marriage) that she decided she didn’t want children and just wanted to focus on her career (mindful, she had No college degree and no job for the first 3 years)

@fkscopes Год назад

If you were upfront how's that unrealistic? Also starting a family is not a big ask unless she's already old enough 35+ that's there significant risk I'm doing so

@catsnchords Год назад

Yep, finding women who want to have children, not abort them, is an increasingly unrealistic expectation today.

@kwpres Год назад

I tell me friends those are the "Otter rules". "Face it Flounder, you f---ed up. You trusted us!"

@soarindragon603 Год назад

It lasted 7 years for me. And I lived with her 7 years before that. Lack of gratitude was definitely a factor. Mind reader, check. Did not try to control. She was good about that. Or maybe she did at some point and I cut it off instantly and forgot all about it. Can't notice any flags with a pathological liar. If you don't know they are that. Some women can hide that very well.

@rafaelshumaker1883 Год назад

Actually, if the divorce comes at 8 years, the petition for divorce likely came at around 7 years. And the decision to file did not come out of the blue. It was where one person decided to give up. But this point was not reached quickly. The problems began years earlier. So if you're putting your focus on addressing the problems in year 8, you likely already missed your best chance to fix things, by at least 3 to 5 years.

@mikey92362 Год назад

Facts!

@thereisnosanctuary6184 Год назад

I'd say by Year 3, someone is in serious regret mode, but too unsure what to do about it.

@maow9240 7 месяцев назад

There will always be a problem that comes up no matter how many years in

@JaseRose1974 Год назад

Unexpressed expectations are dangerous. Expressing expectations is a risk, but can be dealt with when expressed. If they are unrealistic, they will be exposed for what they are. High expectations are not a bad thing, but require increased grace when people don't always reach ilthem.

@kjell1979 Год назад

As long as you and your partner are fully dedicated to ensuring the happiness of one another, then the biggest common issue I've seen is communication. If you can't communicate your needs to your partner and have them understand what exactly you need, then that will cause all sorts of problems. It causes a mismatch of expectations. It can make a partner feel like they're alone in their struggles, which can cause them to do things which result in bitterness from their partner. Communication is key when you run into issues that can affect the happiness of a partner like sex disorders, addiction, depression, or other mental or emotional issues that develop over the course of the relationship. These are things that can easily happen despite you having a very loving partner and they can't take it personally but both sides need to work with each other to continue functioning. I've been married 21 years now and our marriage could have easily ended on many different occasions during the course of that time. I had a partner who cared about my happiness and stuck with me as we learned (the hard way in many cases) the value of communication. Now I feel like barring a breakdown of those two attributes, there isn't any problem we can't endure.

@serenityinside1 Год назад

👍

@RohrerBulldogs Год назад

It's getting to the point where a long term relationship is an unrealistic expectation.

@eQuariuz Год назад

The older she is, in general, post prime, the more eager she wants a LTR.

@RohrerBulldogs Год назад

@@eQuariuz I wasn't referring to availability. I was referring to worth being with in a long term relationship.

@kerryfoster1 Год назад

I'm getting to the point where NOT having a long term relationship is unrealistic. Two together is a powerful and beautiful life.

@eQuariuz Год назад

@@kerryfoster1 You are older though.

@RohrerBulldogs Год назад

@@kerryfoster1 Yes, if you find a unicorn.

@jeffluehrs4400 8 месяцев назад

Sad really that my marriage didn’t work out. You are spot on with your points. Number 3 is spot on and very sad and important for you guys to pay attention to. I was the sole bread winner for many years and helped with all the household chores and did everything outdoors . I tried so hard and it didn’t work. She didn’t appreciate my effort. I settled no doubt, we have two great kids but after that our relationship was not there. I was just a donor. Please pay attention to Her advice…

@guywoznicki7847 Год назад

I’m still watching with mixed emotions. I guess most of my gf’s showed their true colors after about a year and I still haven’t been married. I understand that you can talk about expectations but that mind-reader stuff usually comes out of nowhere and I’ve never met any girl who wanted to talk about it. Seems to me that when her unrealistic expectations are not being met, she starts playing the other cards: expecting mind-reading, becoming resentful or disrespectful, never wanting sex anymore. Since at that point she becomes impossible, the relationship ends. Maybe I’m lucky I never got married. My #1 expectation: sex once per week. Otherwise I could be happier with a dog!

@andersnielsen6044 Год назад

A woman always WANT what she does not have already.. It will never change. ;)

@SKBottom 11 месяцев назад

You are lucky. No marriage, no cohabitation. Always be ready to walk.

@guywoznicki7847 11 месяцев назад

@@SKBottom I have a friend who’s doing very well financially but struggles because he’s 5’6”. Still he does better than I do and he refuses to cohabitate. With all his bad experiences he believes that it ruins the relationship. He says, “Living apart keeps you both forever in a dating frame of mind. Both of you continue to be on your best GAME and it’s less likely that it gets stale and someone develops unrealistic expectations.” I’ve never been there so I can’t comment. My relationships usually turn to shit well before there’s any thoughts of living together.

@JR41N3 10 месяцев назад

You're definitely lucky you never got married. It's a mistake for any man to get married in the west these days in my opinion. I was foolish enough to marry my high school gf, and well.. that didn't go so well for me. Your friend has the right idea. Stay free.

@CoffeeGuzzler40 10 месяцев назад

I'm glad you are slowly blowing up as a RU-vidr right now, I m not really a fan influencers, that is why I think you have always brought in good content to the platform... Keep it up 👍🌹💜

@deanthroop8054 Год назад

I followed for a while, then left because the content was moving a direction that I did not think was healthy. This longer form content on your own is awesome! These insights are incredibly helpful. It is giving perspective (the why) and means to improve things (the how). I see a course laid out and because of the why, a means to adapt on the fly. Thank you for putting the effort into this content and exposing yourself to the negative sides of the Internet.

@isabellezoey 8 месяцев назад

Yeah, it's usually a good idea to cherry pick ideas (in a good way) from different creators. No one creator has all the answers and sometimes they're wrong, but there's some good stuff on here :)

@RetroCaptain Год назад

There were two women who were really extra serious about me. I found out quickly they were presuming that I would heart and soul convert to their ways of thinking and living. No lets decide on what. The first one i would have had to emigrate away to places i would have had no standing to start over from scratch. The second one we really could have worked out but she had a super long list and wouldn't back down on any of the demands. Sadly she passed away from her condition never having had her dream of becoming a wife arrive (no other guy wanted to deal with the excess requirements either & she eventually ran out of time). If she would have let me guide her she would have died a happy wife instead of alone in her room. My way or the highway I guess is how it goes.

@MrKrushgutz Год назад

How old was she when she died?

@RetroCaptain Год назад

@@MrKrushgutz Just passed her 40th birthday basically. Heart attack due to her condition. She was alone at home when it happened on a weekend. She didn't want to be open about her condition but told me her heart wasn't good (yet going on about we'd have to try for kids if we married and it wasn't a debate it was one of her rules basically). She was in her last stage of free mobility while we were seeing each other then after she ended it I heard that she started downhill).

@RetroCaptain 6 месяцев назад

@@KaiserSoze357 No, not at all! She was the perfect weight! I wouldn't have changed a thing. Any red blooded man who is regular average would have said she's fine. 4'9" long hair & DDs and nice booty Italian. She had a rare bone disease. She kept trying to bluff me (it was a car accident no it was a broken bone it was.. and she couldn't remember what she told me the last time. Kept changing the story so I knew it was something serious then by mistake she admitted getting pregnant might stop her heart. She was divided in her mind what to do. It's too bad she couldn't just been totally open with me and let me offer guidance. She desperately wanted to be married and held by a man, & she was attracted to me, and believe me she was built to "be held" (knockout). She was losing the battle to the ravages of her disease and at the same time trying to convince me to risk everything (like having a baby with a woman who dies giving birth), and on top of it convert to her religion which I was to a point willing to be respectful but not completely go under her thumb. She never found another man after sending me packing. Her disease advanced and she died waiting for (doctors to figure out how to cure it). She should have let me take care of her and do the decision making. She could have at least been relaxed that she has a husband she is attracted to and cares about her and focus on fighting her condition rather than trying to control literally everything and everyone and burn up her small energy resources. People don't realize how short life really is!! A once hot smoke show woman I was friends with for years was kinda the same way. Everything had to be her way or the highway. She couldn't let life show her what she needs. She could have been fully been taken care of by me or her other long term guy friend (She said he pushed for a relationship and she gave him a shot, then said "he was boring" and ended it, and wasn't interested in giving me a shot (I'm thinking she presumed I would be boring also). She married Tyrone after like 3 dates, not knowing anything about him past his measurements then discovered he became a permanent part of her chesterfield after getting married. After they divorced she sheepishly admitted she knew I could have been her rock after all (too late)!! Then her once level 9 looks went all to pot, and she began experiencing health and emotional problems that have been ongoing. She is alive and reasonably healthy but not 100% and no men she truly appreciate surrounding her anymore. She sent all the guys who truly appreciated her packing. Going into her declining years essentially alone. I *know for a fact* a bunch of women I have tried getting involved with are all going down this path; 30, 35, 40, 45, 50, etc each year alone and getting wrinkles and saggy and rejected all the men who would have been overjoyed at watching them grow into an old ladies. That's life I guess.

@theshih-tzudad4068 Год назад

If she isn't into your sense of humor...You are Skarooooed

@Hickersonia Год назад

Married 20 years... I don't know if my expectations are unreasonable, but I will admit that they have definitely changed over the last 10 years. Struggling to figure out how I'm supposed to "work on it" if I don't really want to anymore. Resentment, expectations changing and not met, and just in general feeling like I'm an alien in my own home... Thank you very much, though... you always give me something to think about, and that means the world to me. :)

@serenityinside1 Год назад

Sorry to hear chum. From a 59 year old man , my advice …. Get the **** out …asap. Life’s short and precious and there is NOTHING worse than regrets at life’s late stages- believe me !!

@umass84jackcnh Год назад

Thank you Emily for a new series of videos. They are so helpful.

@tink1981 11 месяцев назад

Lack of gratitude and lack of empathy are two major issues that I keep running into. Can't seem to find anyone who is goal oriented and desires to go farther or make more of themselves. Finding someone who actually wants to be a team has proven difficult as well seems to all go one-sided. I find myself being used for what a woman can get me to do for her and the moment I stop doing for them they turn cold. Myself I think I am giving up on dating, all I have seemed to find is misery, heartache, and a lot of resentment

@lesjones471 10 месяцев назад

Have you ever found out the star sign compatibility test.Not all signs work together,some others may work until something cracks then it goes downhill.I'm an Aries so a Leo would be compatible with me.

@Xarosai 8 месяцев назад

@@lesjones471 No one fucking cares about astrology... It's freaking idiotic to think that the time of the year you were born has any influence on a person's character lmfao

@lesjones471 8 месяцев назад

You are welcome to have your own views I'm not forcing them on you,I found the hard way later on when she got settled down things were changing but I did not know why but I do now.Your comment seems you have not done any research at all and think of your own opinion is right.If you were to did deeper and start asking couples how they get along then ask them their birth sign. you say " No one fucking cares about astrology " so how many people did you ask???? NONE,be truthful.I'm an Aries ex was a Virgo worst match going,I'm nearly 75yrs old and been around the world to places of unrest because I joned the UK forces to defend my country and help to keep the peace for 18+ yrs,I did not fear the joining up on my own terms this is how strong Aries are.@@Xarosai

@johnbrown1851 8 месяцев назад

My ex is an Aries and I'm a Virgo.... Why didn't someone warn me?

@TaigaClaws 7 месяцев назад

Thats exactly why I stopped. Stay single for a while til ya awaken the self respect; then ya can try again and ya wont deal with those prissy potatoes

@misterabsurd Год назад

I broke a girl's heart a few months ago. And you just described exactly what happened. She was having a great time with me because she had expectations, and then I inevitably disappointed those expectations.

@andybarboza9134 Год назад

Emily is cute, love that she doesn’t come off as arrogant and pretentious, but wise and self confident. I loved your video where you tell women if you tell a man to fix something, they want to fix it-spot on.

@SwitchFoot2007 Год назад

Oh cut the crap you just want to bang her. Yeah she is cute I can see why you want to.

@josephesposito3499 11 месяцев назад

LOL. She's a grifter

@PaulLefebvre Год назад

It's very difficult as a man to maintain that level of putting it all out there day after day through the life of a relationship. If you leave a woman to get used to that treatment, as soon as you CAN'T keep it up every day, she is going to be seeing that as you no longer loving her.

@jttasb 2 месяца назад

I thought that something like this happened to me/us. Tried to explain how I I have given up so much of what used to be in my life and still it is not enough. Seems to be working out now that I have claimed some of my original life back. This video explains another's take on it that I agree with on certain points: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-jFnjroRD8fo.html

@neilmceachren7112 4 месяца назад

Now I understand when I opened up at age 50 to a woman of the same age she seem to shame me every time we didn’t agree. Needless to say, I left her after 10 years and at age 63 I don’t think I’m ever going to take on another woman. It’s hard work. I’ve always made all the money. I put my kids through college they never had to work and at he end of the day The ladies say they’re not happy because they’re not keeping up with their friends. Today’s women couldn’t hold a candle to my mother or my grandmother. Today’s women are very weak and just expecting that everyone will take care of them because they were born.

@dougscholl9354 10 месяцев назад

Miss Emily, why are you Soooo wise for a young woman ? You are so right on what men feel. I have experienced all of these issues. I Soooo wish I would have met a woman like you when I was younger. How did you arrive at all these revelations ? Wow, just Wow 👍🙃

@thecowboy9698 Год назад

So I have to ask a very real question, and that is: Why is it nowadays that so many women who when you try to talk to them that the instant you say something that they don't like, instead of being courteous and hearing you out to try to understand where you're coming from, they get loud, mouthy, interrupt, and won't let you finish? Yet, if you as a man don't listen to what she has to say, she will immediately condemn you for it. Why is this?

@Skelterbane69 8 месяцев назад

Bad parenting and a society that allows it.

@Lonewolf_rider Год назад

I've always been honest and open about the road ahead and she always agreed until the point she couldn't hold up the facade she was playing and it all came tumbling down. Two baby girls and a honest and loyal father separated because madam wanted to party and F with other men. Now eight years later, madam have a new friend for about three years on and of because madam still got the ich to F around with men. The children are aware of it I'm aware of it but her friend is too blind and as I was too manipulated by her spell. Damn I really f it up because my intuition knew it from the get go and still I proceeded with her and had two children who are now getting wrong examples.

@For3xampleJohn Год назад

Damn. Broke up with the soul sister of your madam. She was stupid enough to give me the signs on a golden platter before I could commit any further (Going on a vacation with a male friend, assuring me she'll be loyal 🤣) Hope you're doing well, good sir 👍

@Lonewolf_rider Год назад

@@For3xampleJohn hope you do too 🙏🏻

@russ9921 Год назад

We’ve all been there and ignored the red flags. Don’t beat yourself up about it. All of us who have been there are bitter but there’s nothing worth doing but to move forward as best you can.

@lesallen1557 Год назад

You have just explained my late wife to a tee. I hade to give up almost everything I enjoyed just to make her happy. She would always control everything. My ideas where always stupid But she never really was I guess. I never claimed to be perfect. And I tried so hard. Never could understand why she turned to alcohol and drugs . I love my wife and miss her so much.

@worksbydandeprez Год назад

As someone who has been in recovery for 34 years I can definitely say that she would have turned to drugs and alcohol with any man, or no man at all. Addiction is what we do and we either face that and take steps to counter-act or we succumb.

@lesallen1557 Год назад

@@worksbydandeprez i tried all I could. And worked so hard to help her with her addiction. But I couldn’t help her at all. People have said you can’t help someone without their willingness. But I still think that I should of tried harder.

@SwitchFoot2007 Год назад

I have a hard time believing you are for real. You are coming off as someone with no respect for himself. Sorry ..dude I don''t believe you.

@ktrimbach5771 Год назад

@@lesallen1557 @worksbydandeprez is right. Her turning to addiction shows unresolved issues in her life. Your inability to make her happy was due to that, not anything you did or could do.

@chall9704 Год назад

It is lovely that you remember her as she was and do keep that in your keepsakes. However, it is clearly not her now and an alcoholic drug abuser will pull you and any children you might have down - even worse when she will almost certainly get prime care of the kids just because she is female. If you are still prepared to take the extreme risk, go and find a girl with high standards - someone who loved once can find love again but make sure she is worth it and really meets your standards before getting into the relationship.

@ericgrosch8073 Год назад

Dating gurus foment unrealistic expectations with their claims, such as, "if you buy my course, you will learn how to generate a woman's excitement about you."

@gregm8522 6 месяцев назад

Concur. Not only appealing to a manipulative mindset but also Totally self-serving.

@sgtjschultz 8 месяцев назад

FOUR! A big part of why my last relationship didn’t work. Strike 1 was her getting mad at me for being frustrated over something at work. Strike two was exoressing a concern in the relationship, and having her get so mad in response she was literally shaking. There was no strike three.

@kerryfoster1 Год назад

The closer you get the easier it becomes to know what your partner is thinking. That is what YOU LOSE when they die. You don't need to explain stuff or justify your actions. It takes a long time to evolve such intimacy. The sense of loss is staggering 😦.

@madlovebar6354 Год назад

My partner died a month ago, took 15 years to develop intuitive "oneness" and being totally happy in each other's company & so at peace. I am so distraught & upset. I don't want to do that ever again. She was & is my one true love. The gamble of the loss is just too much. I prefer stay alone from here on.

@kerryfoster1 Год назад

@@madlovebar6354 SO sorry to hear of your loss. The pain is endless. The sense of being alone is crushing. God bless you.

@jasonwells1471 Год назад

I've been divorced twice. This is why I don't want to date any women anymore and why more and more men stay single. It's very discouraging. I know we men are not perfect, but I think the majority of women are the problem.

@fkscopes Год назад

Most men I've seen over my life have been halfway decent, make an effort etc, most women haven't. Of course there exceptions to both but there are naturally going to be lots of decent guys who can't find decent women due to the discrepancy. Part of the problem is society no longer shames and sometimes encourages bad behavior from women but doesn't accept the same from men.

@ackbuilder8262 Год назад

Lol, premarital counseling..guys- purpose, drive, mission, good women will come along if you are the best versions of yourselves. Real high value man would never go to premarital counseling, no reason for that. And if you are not a high value man - become one.

@JR41N3 10 месяцев назад

I married my highschool gf. I walked out on her two years ago (I'm 30 now) for these reasons and others. She had insanely unrealistic expectations of me as a man, expected me to read her mind and know what's wrong without her having to communicate, withheld intimacy as a way to control me, she was verbally/emotionally abusive and extremely manipulative, she lied to me regularly, and worst of all, she cheated on me. After I left her she lied to anyone who would listen that I abused her so she could appear as the victim and make me out to be the bad guy. I did the best I could. I did everything for her, but nothing was ever enough for her. Honestly, idk if I'll ever be able to let my guard down enough to let someone get close to me like that ever again.

@shepard23 4 месяца назад

I'm sorry for your situation....

@mitchmilner5291 10 месяцев назад

Wow a sensible logical woman. So refreshing. There is hope for the women out there in our wide world. Regards Mitch from Australia 🇦🇺

@mysterio1570 Год назад

I think that we can only think in life as 3 yr arcs. That includes relationships. The timelines of our lives are always at play.

@LowerTheBoom Месяц назад

Not only am I not able to read other people's minds, further I do not *WANT* to be able to read other people's minds. Even if it we're possible for one person to read another person's mind (which it is not). What kind of a weirdo or creep would *WANT* to read another person's mind? That's like being a Peeping Tom or something.

@marktapley7571 Год назад

If you need marriage counseling before (or after) marriage that tells you all you need to know. End the relationship immediately. Probably the best way to ascertain the true character of the woman is to spend some time around her family, especially her mother. What kind of people are they? Are they peaceful, neat, industrious, frugal, contented, or argumentative, bickering, heavy drinkers or lazy. Be aware that women (not the man) file 70-80% of divorces because they are more emotional (so less logical) and they are all well aware that the “family court” system is overwhelmingly in their favor. Best solution is go MGTOW.

@markkilley2683 Год назад

Being prepared to be disappointed is a good method to overcome most of the hassles.

@Pssst.ByTheWay Год назад

Recently Allexander, Grace did a video about people getting together, and not knowing what they want where the one person completely falls into the other persons frame. If you don’t know what you want that one, it might develop or change in the short term or medium term or long term, and then the person you are with is no longer the person you want to be with, He proposes that men and women, knowing what they want, actually, knowing what they want, allows them to commit long-term. Everything else is sort of doomed to the coin, toss of fates fancy.

@TaylorWalston Год назад

Agreed, I was married for 28 years to a woman who told me she wanted to be one person, then never acted like that person. She came from a bad family, so I definitely wanted to help her get there. Unfortunately, holding her accountable to those wishes just frustrated both of us.

@thereisnosanctuary6184 Год назад

The only problem here, is that for Every Man who decides to self evaluate, realize his worth, values, goals, weaknesses and strengths, there must also be a woman of his SMV doing same. For every obese man that decides to eat right and lose weight, there must also be a fatlady doing same, or did same. Just like every employee needs an employer. This isn't happening. Women, Emily excluded, are largely not reevaluating, adjusting to the new paradigm. They are binge-eating "Spot The Narcissist" videos,

@reginaldreid3360 Год назад

I made this mistake. I knew she had super high expectations of man because of her losses in her mind. I did everything I could to care and love her but I had to wait for my car and she left. Even though I wrote to her and helped out 2 years of my time wasted thank u for sharing this. I've learned from your channel.

@bdcochran01 6 месяцев назад

I have actually heard the biggest mistake a man can make and the biggest mistake a woman can make in the form of admissions. Man - I maried her because she looked good on my arm. Woman - he was handsome, had money and I thought that I had it made, snapping her fingers. You marry your best friend. You go into marriage with the resolve to stick it out. I was one of apparently the few men who looked at a woman, decided in an instant that she was the one and then worked to the result. "Working to the result" means listening, making adjustments and being a team.

@w.s.2102 Год назад

The mistake men are making “is” picking a partner…… bachelor life rules 😎

@poisonfortheweak 11 месяцев назад

Amen to that, stay smart- had I not f’ed up years ago and committed to a single mom with 2 terrible kids, I would be living the damn DREAM. Imagine this- making a quarter million a year, swank ass house on 22 acres… bangin it out in life- but I got this ungrateful woman and her two disrespectful kids destroying my house, can’t even beg for her to give me some booty- I would imagine if I was a woman who was with a guy that made so much money living in a damn near mansion, and he was paying all my bills and supporting- and more importantly TOLERATING both my POS kids who appreciate me even less than she does… The least I could do would be to not treat him like shit and give him a little bit of booty once every couple months instead of tell him how he isn’t making me happy (wtf?)… working 16 hour days while she sits at home drinking and scrolling through Facebook all fkn day and night… Like she literally told me that me giving her a back scratch and foot rub was irritating her just today. When I try and get some affection (legit affection not sexual, just hugging on her) she says CAN YOU PLEASE STOP MOVING SO MUCH AND STOP TOUCHING ME. Bitch you’re sleeping at 5pm in the afternoon because you drank all night and you woke up for a few hours and drank all day until you literally slumped over and passed out…. This is what you deal with, when you’re with an ingrate woman. I’m like a couple weeks away from selling all I have and telling them all to take a hike. Then she can find her another dumbass that will spend all his money on her and her spoiled ass kids. Except what she’ll get is a SERIOUS downgrade whatever scraps she can get at age 40 with 2 terrible disrespectful loud ass kids. No credit to myself I think there isn’t a moron like myself that would put up with that shit for 7 weeks much less 7 years. Stay single. For God sakes stay single. I promise you it’s the #1 most brilliant decision you’ll ever make in your life. Sorry for the negativity and spite but I’m about at the point man where I’m flat out sick of this shit being treated like a POS when literally all I do is take care of her, be considerate and thoughtful to her… attempt to be affectionate and caring and all she can say every time I express a grievance is I’m an irritable asshole. No shit. You and your kids have taken what would be a fkn bomb ass life, living like a boss and turned it into a never ending nightmare of frustration, exhaustion and depression. Soon as I get the balls to give up everything I’ve worked my entire life for… she’s gonna get a real rude awakening.

@Piggyy33 Год назад

Seriously are women worth it anymore? I'm doubting it Very much. Such a shame.

@troyhomann533 Год назад

I just love this young woman. Always try to catch her posts. Totally interesting. I sincerely hope she’s happy in her own personal life. I’m sure she’s helped many people.

@angelmarc4151 Год назад

many red flags show in first few weeks, others in in first few months, just need to have cold head, and not simping -> i made that mistake

@SilverWolf3862 18 дней назад

truly horrible these things even exist, aren't we a sad pathetic petty species?

@pprivard 11 месяцев назад

I thank you for this!!! I grew up with my parents as marriage counselors (for Catholics termed Marriage Preparation), and this echoed everything I've heard (from parents) and learned (in my one and only "common-law" marriage) to my late wife. You REALLY have to be real with each other to see AND learn if you are a good fit for each other.

@brookebenton8192 9 месяцев назад

Pick with the big head instead of the little one. That will prevent most issues up front.

@armia1george Год назад

Finally we have a woman who support men. You show thus through your insights. God bless

@stevec3526 Год назад

There are a number of them out there if you open your eyes.

@andersnielsen6044 Год назад

There is NO connection at all - if you have to pay for it.. It really is that simple. ;)

@TiffanyDesvigne-nc6hl 11 месяцев назад

Everytime I watch your videos I wish that I could find female friends like you. I often have conversations about the things you talk about and I have met very few people who agree with me, especially women. Apparently I am morally incorrect for thinking like you. I don't understand why toxic femininity and hostility towards consideration and love is so common now.

@jeffsmith5927 10 месяцев назад

My first marriage had all those red flags. Controlling, the expectation of knowing what she was thinking, never happy with anything I did, could only be happy when she got what she wanted and still wasn't happy. Low self esteem issues. Poor with money, always seeking the fun thing and not being responsible with money. Just wanted more and more and more continually trying to spend her way to happiness. Where does one find a good woman cuz I've been looking for 10 years.

@Pssst.ByTheWay Год назад

Dont date potential. Its like kissing a poster of nsync or Britney spears. Having a relationship with a Phantasie. Alas, there was a time when I didn’t really feel worthy of anything, so sometimes having a relationship with the fantasy , projected onto a real person, was the norm. It was incredibly unfair and ended in my heart break every single time.

@rapsack7058 Год назад

Don't raise the expectations while dating. When you gone all and above at the first dates, at the beginning of the relationship to persue this woman to be your GF, than often enough hav set the standard for the further relationship way to high and she will expaect way to much.

@antebellum606 10 месяцев назад

It's even more frustrating when a woman doesn't know what they're looking for but will still match you with some criteria that they think they should have. You may tick all of these relationship boxes but she'll reject you anyway if you didn't manage to make her absolutely infatuated like some school girl chasing the spark.

@mspicer3262 Год назад

I actually watch for the lack of gratitude. If somebody can't say "thank you", I take note of that. They may not have been raised right. More often than not, I'll immediately call it out, by loudly saying "you're welcome!", sarcastically if it is something that happens a lot. I consider gratitude to be one of the main pillars that a relationship should be built on. Along with honesty, respect, communication, compromise and trust. There are those who think I have no shame, but really, I just won't put up with the disrespect people show with a lack of gratitude. I show gratitude and respect to others, and I expect it in return. Having arms covered with tattoos and a big bushy beard, I'm scary looking enough to get it, but those who know me, know I'm more of a teddy bear than a grizzly.

@poisonfortheweak 11 месяцев назад

Isn’t that the worst? Man. I’ve lived with an unappreciative woman for 7 years and it’s just horrible especially paired with lack of reciprocity in effort. That is hand and hand with lack of respect, or showing respect. Third to that trifecta is lack of the ability to admit that they are wrong, or to ever acknowledge that they have not been meeting you halfway. Without admission and acknowledgment there is never going to be compromise. And without compromise, the relationship is done for. If they always blame you for everything, and they’re never wrong… its always you coming up short and their lack of meeting you halfway is you… trouble. They want you to give me and if they don’t show you appreciation or respect it’s because you’re not doing enough or you’re not doing things right. Even when you put forth the extra effort to meet their one sided demands.

@RobBankbuddyP. Год назад

I am bad at picking a partner, but I found the BEST by accident. whew

@White_Crow_38B 8 месяцев назад

1 red flag will always outweigh 1 million green flags.

@ryannolfe9051 Год назад

Every girlfriend I've had wanted me to read their mind. I always thought I was the problem, but I see now that I used to be attracted to toxic women.

@georget.6357 Год назад

Yes, my divorce was caused, in part, by her unrealistic expectations. I could never make her happy, and in ignorance I tried everything, until I changed and matured enough to realize that I am not responsible for her happiness. She wanted to shape and change me into something I am not, and the delusions became very unhealthy. We are each responsible for our own emotions, thoughts, attitudes and happiness. A partner should support that and we should not try to make people change.

@dnewbury52 Год назад

There's an old saying that goes something like "A woman marries a man hoping he'll change and a man marries a woman hoping she won't".

@MHLivestreams Год назад

Men, go your own way, think of yourselves and the future, invest well, save, improve. Protect your wealth, health, and happiness. This is not 1950 anymore, decent housewife types are incredibly rare. It's all about wealth extraction now. Guard your wallet and your heart.

@lifebarier Год назад

I can't make mistake. Because I have no one to pick from!

@djrichylaurence8991 Год назад

I just wanted someone who appreciated me but ended up wasting years of my life on someone who thought their career was more important and they were not at fault ever.

@jasonreichter3973 Год назад

Getting married after short courtships used to work, but that was before most women became toxic. And to get to women like that, we have to go back to the 40's and some of the 50s. Now days, there are so few non-toxic women out there, that the chance of finding one is very small. Plus divorce laws that reward women for getting divorced didn't exist back in the day. So we're stuck in a big mess now. Passport bros may have the only chance, but that's not guaranteed.

@_kenothia Год назад

I'll say this, how you start is how you'll finish. Really easy to see, the first time that happened, a naive younger me went in with the "superman" complex, and I learnt the lesson above painfully. Any time a woman starts off with that mentality, I'm running, running for the hills.

@MrZeissOne Год назад

Who is raising these children?

@marquinho999 Год назад

Clone this Emily for me. 😊

@mozpogson3639 Год назад

The foundation of anger is unmet expectations.

@Pay-It_Forward Год назад

Women tend to be unsure about what they really want. Females treat guys like a box of chocolates or a bag of skittles & keep sampling other flavors in order to make up her mind as to which flavor is best. But by then the guy feels rejected & leaves even if she ends up deciding that he actually is her soulmate!

@Jackietreehorn-z5e Год назад

I like this chick's hair

@datman6266 Год назад

Boom, nailed it! Thank you for this video!

@chitownnemesis2182 Год назад

I refuse to continue to date any women whom will not match my efforts in dating. If she can not invest herself into the dating scene, she sure is NOT going to invest herself into a relationship. That is a big red flag with me and a lot of guys I know when dating women. Women just don't understand this, and that is where they make the biggest mistakes in dating.

@eyeswideopen67 Год назад

Only the top 5% of men can afford to "pick" a partner. The rest of us filter what is offered to us...which is the garbage.

@victoriaalicewestwood3558 6 месяцев назад

:( so 95% of women are garbage to you? That seems a very sad assessment...

@guntertorfs6486 Год назад

Watched a few of your videos.After this one : subscribed.

@swr1240 Год назад

Biggest mistake? Choosing a woman, and trying to be in a relationship. (Kidding...kind of)

@jk0000079 Год назад

Well, the main thing about Expectations (not only in relationships) is, that: if they are not met, it is a mistake on the side of the person who made that Expectation, and not on the side of the person who was supposed to have met that Expectation.

@2011JYC Год назад

I'm not happy being single and alone either!!!!!

@seventhson27 12 дней назад

FROM 3000 years ago: A Good Woman: 10Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. 11 The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain. 12 She does him good and not evil All the days of her life. -- Proverbs 31:10-12

@Mike88GT Год назад

good god, 5 minutes in, still hasn't gone anywhere, just a bunch of words

@joefromravenna Год назад

Honestly back in the day i read through hundreds of female profiles on dating sites and 99% had unrealistic expectations. I got 3 dates from dating sites, because even guys have unrealistic expectations.

@khalaq2 3 месяца назад

Introduction 0:36 Definition of Unrealistic Expectations 1:37 Impact of Unrealistic Expectations 2:27 Recognizing Unrealistic Expectations in Yourself 5:31 Length of Time Before the Divorce 7:10 Red Flags Indicating Unrealistic Expectations 7:39 - Lack of Gratitude - Lack of Clear Communication - Controlling Behavior - Negative Reaction to Expressed Vulnerability How to Avoid Unrealistic Expectations 12:01 - Extended Dating Period - Communicating Expectations Prior to Marriage

@UTBanjo Год назад

What about when you clearly talk about and agree on expectations, then about a month after the wedding she stops trying.

@fkscopes Год назад

Hopefully you can still get an annulment at 30 days cause you married a chameleon

@kurtkrause7151 Месяц назад

If you haven't even met, yet this is happening behind your back(with your ex-friend) RED FLAG!!

@kingof.london 8 месяцев назад

Expect more from yourself, than from others, and you will avoid all that 'expectations' drama.

@JimPippin-wc7fq Год назад

The biggest mistake men make when picking a partner is that they are not picking you.

@kldimond 11 месяцев назад

I made two big mistakes on marriage: 1. Following through when she showed me ridiculous antagonisms that I did, as you say, pass off as ... in my case, 'just getting jittery, will clear up when she's really secure; 2. I held onto that THING that ate me from the stomach out, for 20 years. Be ready to not only let go, but jettison a cretin, not at the first indication, perhaps, but when it shows as a 'reliable' pattern. If I had done that, there would not have been a wedding... or 20 years of hell, or all the post divorce crap. And that advice works for both women and men: understand that 'they' are on best behavior early on: it gets worse from here, if it's bad. On the other hand, if the relationship really buds, 'best behavior' isn't even really a factor--the passion and partnership will simply drive beautiful things. And if you get that, take loving care of it.

@robertbiron Месяц назад

Wow, this video went up 1 year ago, Emily where have you been all my life? You just described all the bad dates I ever had. But I think these unrealistic expectations were reinforced by magazines like Cosmopolitan and other's who influence and mess up peoples lives. Emily is the best influencer I have ever heard.

@brianpayne2478 Год назад

Re: “unrealistic expectations”, 100% of todays women, have unrealistic expectations. And no, I’m not exaggerating.

@andrewtongue7084 Месяц назад

Ms. King, are you a qualified Counsellor or Therapist ? There is an indication (to me) that you've never been married; it is as likening you to a Catholic Priest - no personal experience of Marital life or status, yet you expound (apparent) common sensical narratives. I wonder if you'd be kind enough to proffer your viewers with a response, Thank you.

@Timberius 2 месяца назад

I like the *Red Flags* 1. Lack of gratitide 2. Lack of clear communication 3. She tries to control him, change him and his behaviors/habits, thinks she knows it all 4. Bad reaction in regards to partner's feelings and vulnerabilities, shaming or exploiting thereof. *Dating long enough to see red and green flags* Communicating expectations prior to living together.