Markiplier Makes: PIE 

"i put three!" "i put two?" "i put one." you're supposed to put *none*

Markiplier's Fruit Pie Ingredients: All-purpose flour Salted stick of butter Large box of Blueberries Large box of Raspberries 7 Apples Grounded Cinnamon Grounded Nutmeg Cane sugar Salt 2 Eggs [Making the "pie crust"] Don't wash your hands, there is no reason to. Optionally rub the nearest person to you for that rustic taste Spray a little spit into the bowl for that nice pop of flavor Add about a cup and a half of flour Add a teaspoon of salt Add 2 eggs Contemplate who opened and used the cinnamon Never touch the nutmeg, it is just there for emotional support Possibly 2-3 tablespoons of water or enough to make the texture look dough like Flour the surface you are using Knead the dough and start beating the dough until you are close After a bit of beating and kneading form the dough into a thick circle or a mound like thing Beat the dough with a rolling pin 27 times Place 2-3 squares of butter on half of the dough and fold it Beat the dough with the rolling pin evenly Repeat the last 2 steps again Fold the dough 6 more times without butter and roll it out after each fold, no this is not a croissant silly You should have folded your dough a total of 8 times Prove the dough for an hour [Making the filling] Peel 7 apples Note that you don't have any whores Place pan on stove at medium heat Slice 2 apples into 4 faces around the core. The core should end up as a rectangular cutout Save the 2 cores for your dead family Place apple into pan and then realize they are too big Cut each face into thirds and add back into pan Add half a box of blueberries Squish 2 handfuls of raspberries and add them to the pan Dust the fruit and berries with sugar with an even coating Cook until berries are soft Say goodbye to the 5 other apples you will never use [Completing the pie] Split dough into 2 portions Flour your surface and roll out dough Perform windowpane test Place first portion into the pie tray Add filling Roll out other portion of dough and put it on top of the filling Perform windowpane test again Cut out extra dough and cut 4 holes 90 degrees from each other Bake pie until golden on center rack Congratulations you made Markiplier's croissant fruit pie! You can find the recipes for Ethan's pizza and Tyler's Pretzel in their respective videos if you are lucky. Or control + f "Tyler's Pretzel Recipe" and "Ethan's Recipe" and go ham scrolling through the comments.

I dont know how Ethan used the whisk correctly and broke it and how Mark was just mashing with it and didn’t

Mark: being a masochist Ethan: having a mental breakdown Tyler: genuinely making a pie

"whoever is editing this..." "𝒾𝓉𝓈 𝓂𝑒" "put a bunch of gore and blood in this" "𝓃𝑜"

Every Markiplier Makes like: Mark: *I grew up poor* Tyler: *L A U G H S* Ethan: *E G G*

Mark: Made a good-looking pie Tyler: Made a good-tasting pie Ethan: Made a _pie?_

Tyler: makes pie crust Mark: makes a croissant Ethan: makes an abomination

Mark: looks the best Tyler: tastes the best Ethan: _tried his best_

The title isn't wrong... Mark did make a pie, Tyler made a tart with a little thingy on top and Ethan... He was there...

Quotes from this video that float in my mind. Eef: "Sex is great, but you ever had a pie?" Mark: "We need to develop the glutens..." *proceeds to punch pie dough* Tyler: "I had a great dream about Mickey Mouse chopping carrots that were screaming!" Such chaos, such beauty. God it's been like 3 years since this vid was posted and I'm just now commenting, oof.

Mark thinking that he knows the secret trick to making a pie crust: Croissant: imma ruin this whole man's career

List of things Ethan broke in this video: The whisk The apple peeler His own pie Probably his sanity Mark and Tyler's taste buds

The “We need more time” “We don’t need more time!” bit really hits hard now

I love baking pies, this video was a roller coaster of emotions for me. Mark: "You need to develop the gluten" Me: "NO!"

Because of Ethan, I've decided to make a face pie Update: so my oven decided to "clean itself" while my pie was in there so the face looks more cursed than it should've

The “Sex is great but you ever had a pie” should be a shirt

tylers pie slice looks like something out of a shop. markes slice looks like something home made. Ethans looks back at you

Tyler's pie: Is a nice pie Mark's pie: Super appealing to look at Ethan's pie: You don't eat the pie, the pie eats you

It's very obvious when Mark is editing by how many times someone's face is distorted, and I love it

Mark: "Editor, put a mouse on this sharp thing with blood and guts" Also Mark: *No*

Mark: WE GREW UP POOR Also Mark: I AM A MAN WITH FIVE OVENS

Pie crust is literally just flour, butter, water and salt. How can you get that so wrong 😂

Me: lmao this is hilarious Also me who bakes: this hurts me deeply Why’d they all put egg in their pie crust 😭

Mark sounds like hes a judge on a cooking show Tyler sounds like he's a contestant on said cooking show Ethan sounds like the crazy guy who escaped the asylum and found his way onto a studio set for a cooking show

Ethan: "Heapass" Mark: "No one gets that joke yet" Ethan: *I am 4 parallel universes ahead of you*

Watching this in 2022, still laughing at it (also, I was late to the party, lol). Also...am I the only one who wants to see "Markiplier Makes: Pasta"?

Mark: I can’t think of a single redeeming quality about your creation. Ethan: Scare factor.

Tyler made a tart Mark made a pie with uncut crust And Ethan made- a sacrifice-

mark:*presses on his pie* "oh look steam comes out!" ethan:*presses on his pie* me: "oh look you can hear the screams of the damned!"

Wonder how many souls Ethan's pie is worth...

mark’s right brain: PUT A MOUSE IN THIS WITH GOREY SOUNDS mark’s left brain: No.

Mark’s looked the best, Tyler’s tasted the best, and Ethan’s had a lot of _personality_

Ethan: *doing his best* The Audience: *Everyone liked that* 🥺

Making pie crust, two things you don't want to hear are "I put too much egg..." "We need to develop the gluten!"

Mark and Ethan: *being as reckless and crazy as possible* Meanwhile Tyler: *just casually peacefully making his pie*

Gordon Ramsay would have died of stress if he saw Ethan’s pie.

You’ve heard of “whistle while you work.” Mark now proudly presents: “Sing while you slice!!”

I liked hearing about the different number of eggs they used while making a PIE CRUST

Ethan: is confused Mark: succeeds through sheer will Tyler: genuinely tries

Tyler: *Takes the project 100% seriously* Mark: *Pretends to take the project seriously, but is actually less serious than how he tries to present himself* Ethan: O.o

i like how each of the pies kinda represent them perfectly Tyler's: just a pie, no chaos, about it just perfect. Mark's: a small bit chaotic but still reached the end goal well. Ethan's: ya...

mark and tyler be like "I made a pie!" ethan "I made a dirty pan!!"

-*Ethan:* is confident then has a mental breakdown -*Mark:* Half tries and his turns out the best -*Tyler:* Sincerly tries his best and is also the calmest

Marks storys about his childhood every video is like Heinz Doofenshmirtz childhood

Tyler's pie: the sort of thing I would buy in bulk and kill myself from eating so much of it Marks pie: sort of thing you would make for Thanksgiving Ethan's "pie": the sort of thing you summon with a circle of candles

2:33 Ethan has accidentally nailed the asexual slogan

Ethan's psychopath pie: _1 HUMAN FACE_ _3 Pounds of microwaved apples_

Ethan: *tries to whisk a dough* “...I think I broke the whisk.”

Ethan's Pie looks like the cover of The Necronomicon 🤣

Mark: cooking apples in pan Tyler: cooking raspberries and blueberries in pan Ethan: puts apples in microwave

"Sex is great, but have you tried PIE?" A boy after my heart.

I feel like Ethan is constantly on the verge of having a mental breakdown

Tyler makes a pie, Ethan makes a face, and Mark makes a croissant. Very good pies, everyone

mark: * gentle pats* 2 seconds later mark: * starts beating the dough*

I fear no man... But this thing... **looks at Ethan's pie** ...it scares me...

i always hope for ethan and then it all goes miserably wrong

Ethan’s pie looks like the face of the Oogie Boogie Man from The Nightmare Before Christmas 😂😂😂

Ethan living in 2020 while Mark and Tyler are trying to exchange cleanliness through sheer friction.

ethan: "I think i broke the whisk" Also ethan: *brakes apple peeler*

Tyler: secretly a masterchef Mark: a ManChild making jokes out of everything and not taking it seriously but pretending he is Ethan: trying his best

I love how the start of every single video like this is just so damn chaotic and wild, but at the end by the judging phase they change into totally different people

Mark's pie: messy, normal pie. Tyler's pie: a kids art project. Ethan's pie: Godwyn's corpse.

“Sex is great, but have you ever had a pie?” -Ethan “Wingus-Heapass” Nestor 2019 Edit: for people saying his name is heapass, here ya go I fixed it 😁

Mark: I baked you a pie All subscribers: oh boy, what flavour? Mark: pretzels.

For some odd reason, when Mark was flipping between him editing and him making the request, the stare and town just made me feel like I was about to get smacked down by John Wick 😂😂😂

markiplier: you gotta *fold* layers of butter *proceeds to beat the shit out of his dough*

"whoever's editing this, maybe it's me " Future mark: *it's me*

Tyler texting Mark, “I took a piss today. It lasted 47 seconds.” Ethan texting Mark, “My grilled cheese is uneven. I think I am going to die. Mark help me please.”

Mark : “I’ve got seven cores, and seven wh0r3s!” Also Mark : “Amy that’s a lie! I don’t have any wh0r3s!” / SINGS

Ethan: Insert random bullcrap Mark: Kinda focused Tyler: Very focused Me: dying laughing

“If you don’t have a filling in your pie, you don’t have a pie Fuckhole.” Technically, Hot Pockets are pies. Discuss.

"If that talks to me before I eat it, I'm going to be very upset" Best line in the video

mark rambling about how they don't need more time brought flashbacks of UA... that shid h u r t e d

17:25 you can tell in this video that Ethan has just had a rough day and is not really liking Mark's jokes about him at the moment. Poor guy. Been there!

I wanna know how Ethan flirts with his girlfriend. It’ll be hilarious if he literally picks up an Apple, eats it, and stares at her. *with **_PASSION_*

Imagine having corona virus and watch Ethan wash his hands as mark and Tyler rub their hands together

Love Mark thanking Amy nonstop. Shows how much he loves her

Mark: Whoever is editing, maybe it’s me,- Future Mark: Its me Mark: Can you put a mouse in this and put a lot of blood and real gore sound effects? Future Mark: no.

Every video Tylers food: "That doesn't look too bad" Marks food: "That looks delicious" Ethans food: "WOW that looks..................very.........YES"

I love how "proffessional" they make themselves sound

watching this on pi day 3 years later bc this is still one of my fave videos that mark made with tyler and ethan

Ethan: I baked you a *p i e* Mark and Tyler: Oh boy what flavor? Ethan: *chalk and disappointment.*

Everything Ethan ever makes in "markiplier makes" always ends up being a good representation of how put together my life is. :')

I get the feeling Mark just likes playing with the editing stuff because of how many silly little edits are here. Makes me happy.

Mark: "im not a masochist" Also Mark seeing tyler suffering: "I gotta try that"

Past Mark: "Whoever's editing this- Maybe it's me-" Future Mark: "..It's me." Past Mark: "Can you just edit a mouse- just a lot of blood as I-" Future Mark: ".... No."

Mark:”I grew up poor.” Me: and now you have a house with multiple ovens.

Special Drop: Ethan's Pie When consumed, Ethan's Pie grants 10 souls but deals 20 damage over 10 seconds

Considering they all made the crust entirely wrong, it's impressive how edible Mark's and Tyler's pies look. Ethan, however.. used 3 more eggs than he was supposed to.

POV: You're binge watching Markiplier Makes because it's the closest thing to Unus Annus you can find.

Mark edited this like he just discovered how to swirl and enlarge faces.

Mark while recording: CHAOS! Mark while editing: *n o*

19:29 If anything it looks more like a glove than love lol

The post Unus Annus depression has set in and I'm here for some Mark and Ethan content Edit: I think that we're all aware that Tyler is also in these videos but thanks for all the reminders

18:11 Mark: Who do you think I am? Me: A man with 5 ovens-

8:26 "I'll go whole *h o g* ."

Tyler: making a T letter on his pie Markiplier: *"Okay jesus lover-"*

Ethan: I bAkEd yOu a piE Mark: _oh boy what flavor?_ Ethan: *_death_*

eggs needed for pie: 0 mark: 1 tyler: 2 ethan: 3 i’m still at the start of the video but i have absolute faith