Miscellaneous Myths: Heracles 

He was probably like, "Husband destroyer? Challenge accepted!"

*Top 10 Most Epic Anime Battles*

*Gets boned to death*

Appearantly, she fell into despair when she realized what she did and killed herself. >.> Way to go, Herc.

And people still say the name "Victor Von Doom" is too on the nose.

OXOTNHK aka D3ath Patr0l Hercules: I bet you only destroy your husband in bed ayyyyyy (a couple of years pass) Hercules, currently covered in hydra acid: “should have seen this coming, oh well, may as well bellyflop onto a fire.”

*clap* *clap* *clap*

"Husband Destroyer? Challenge accepted."

\m/ METAL name. Nice

*most intense metal scream*

and his mortal sin is wrath... from someone with the sin of wrath, he really is a polite dude

@@arthurdias6860 . . . like for 4 minuts, and the moment it does not go his way he rampages. He shot an arrow at poor hades, it is thanks to hades, that that did not escalate and end in disaster, not Heracles . . .

It kind of makes sense though. When all logical and diplomatic possibilities of negotiation and discussion are extinguished the only pathway that is left is the path of Wrath and warfare. And Hercules is the very apotheosis of this. His wrath is his downfall only when he finds all avenues of negotiation extinguished leaving it as his only way forward as he can see. I can associate deeply with this concept. For there is nothing that can drive a logical or rational reasonable person to the depths of foaming at the mouth insane rabid rage, then dealing with someone so obstinate, arrogant and stubborn that they refused to give even an inch for the sake of negotiation of diplomacy.

@@SingingSealRiana good point, but that was incidental, wasn't?

@@arthurdias6860 Considering how many times Red basically went "He killed a guy," wrath does make sense, even if Red glossed over those parts.

Unfortunately, it changed, thats why ancient Greece isnt today Greece

@@JocaPlays87 well if you want greece to restart slavery then.....

@@wankawanka3053 The ritual torture was also bad... You know like the "Creten Bull" where you make a cage/horn out of bronze the shape of a bull, and the screams of the people you're torturing sound like bull moos/bugles. Other stuff sucked too about ancient Greece that luckily don't exist in modern Greece, but if someone wants Greek bi/poly love triangles with cheating, (like ancient myths,) i'm sure someone would fund that reality show.

@@viewer-of-content that was literally an execution tool, the human sacrifices were much more hands on when they happened

@@viewer-of-content pretty sure that was just used as an execution not as a religious tool

Superdark33 A foe the crab faced because of Hera in the first place... Bitch

That is a fascinating story, especially since I'm a Cancer! Go crabs!

go crabo go !

Superdark33 that is the story books and parents should tell, "this constellation is cancer the crab, they say the greek goddess hera put the crab up there after getting curbstomped by hercules"

Superdark33 Holly shit that's adorable

Given that intended outcome was "and then the thing killed Heracles", 'put it back' is appropriate response to a 'success'.

PUT THAT THING BACK WHERE IT CAME FROM SO HELP

A. Cunningham I will invoke the wrath of Hera on your soul.

@@a.cunningham4974 is... is your username a book of mormon reference??? If so, HEY BROTHER!

The best part is how these shenanigans were portrayed by the Greeks themselves--look up the "Antimenes painter"

Literally came

@@josephradley3160 i- 😀

He hurled his thunderbolt if you know what I mean 😉

@@jackrobertson6808 nudge nudge, wink wink, say no more squire.

This sub comment section is a nightmare

Persephone is literally half the reason I want to be like Hades.

@@josephradley3160 what's the other half?

@@mohammedyousef4005 He has the best dog in the world.

While Heracles runs over like HEY MAN I BROUGHT THIS BACK HHAHAHAHAA, absolutely brilliant.

@@josephradley3160 makes since to me

Someone else has heard that "Cerberus" could be translated as "spot"!

Some vase work also shows Cerberus leaning into Hades’s hand, wanting to be petted. Yup, the guy took one of the spawn of Echidna and Typhon, named it Spot, and made it the family dog.

@@narutardkyuubi Sweet!

Emery Paine Pretty awesome power move

narutardkyuubi that’s adorable 😍

I've always found it unfathomable how Disney could make Heracles' greatest foe basically have no role in his story.

More like imma make this man's whole career

@@kylepessell1350 yeah. Annoying Disney with no respect for source material

hera: why can't I end this man's whole career?!

That's Hercules doe *wink wink*

Hades got shot

@@benquinn3817 can you kill somebody who is already death tho

@NoOneCares yeah but he lives in the underworld he is halfway there

And Persephone consoled Hades... so cute... plus "'cause Heracles was a toothy little baby and boob nommed a little to hard, and thre him away because, ow." I *DIED.*

Hades would disagree. He survived sure. But you survive stubbing your toe too. And I'm sure you'd still object to describing that as "nothing went wrong in the process"

I mean, that's practically the point of the Amazons in Greek myth: to be conquered by the mighty spears of male heroes. In either capacity. Ancient Greece was like that about women.

@@daviddaugherty2816 to be fair it was hercules He so handsome even straight guys would turn gay

@@painvillegaming4119 "be gentle Hercules"

@@augustuslunasol10thapostle r.I.p the continent

@@painvillegaming4119 lol

how has no one replied to clarify how this works

His last marriage happened after he died and became a god on Olympus.

Yeah he married the goddes of youth in heaven.

Awesoke, Stephen Because it was explained in the video

@@archibaldholmer9920 Hebe

I need to use that

Using this

I can very clearly hear Kirishima from BNHA saying this

You don't like boys? That's pretty gay bro...

PrincesRoyalCan And fries that was a very spartan thing cus you’d fight harder to save someone you love, so love your fellow soldier. That or Greek ass is worth killing an army over....

Oh hey you're hades

@@Shirokroete indeed i am

@@yesyouarecorrect1315 Hug persephone for me will you

@@Shirokroete sure why not

Fun fact: that stick/staff had a pine cone on the top which iirc had some magic powers that he used to smack the giants with

Lol he just wanted someone who could dominate him the way he dominates in all his fights, no shame

@@bobthegamingtaco6073 There is a part of the story when Heracles went to retrieved the Cereberus that he met his friends and fellow Argonauts, for example Meleager. Meleager asks Heracles to keep eye on his sister because he was worried about her. Heracles as a man with honor so after finishing all his labor, he went to see Deinara and took her as his wife instead, though Meleager warned him. This explained how Deinara and Heracles met.

@@wyvrusgriffion3948 Hercules, to Meleager: "dude, I dunno how to tell you this, but your sister is capital H Hot!" Meleager: "what, the husband destroyer? She literally just crushed her last husband's skull between her legs!" Hercules, with hearts for eyes: "yeah..."

Nate TSO the truth hurts

I feel like not enough blame is placed on Hera for thinking that infanticide is an appropriate response to her cheating husband.

Magmafrost13 also true

Zeus can hardly be blamed for what happened. Hera's immaturity was what got multiple people murdered, a baby born prematurely, and Heracles' life being one giant shitfest.

Class A, Rank 7; RU-vid Hero: Keyboard Warrior While Hera certainly wasn’t the most mature person in this situation, I still think the blame largely falls to Zeus who, despite knowing that Hera hates it when he cheats and is wont to punish his children severely for it, he still goes around putting his dick in whatever pretty girl he feels like.

It always made sense to me. After all, Hades is literally Heracles' uncle, and Artemis is his half-sister. Hera might be mad at her husband's bastard for existing but there's no reason Heracles' relatives also would be.

He knows all those guys, they made him swag, but the nemean lion broke them.

I can imagine Hades being shot like "Fucking dog! Uncle Hades, I'll just shoot the mutt so he sleeps for a while!" "Heracles stop he doesn't like arr-- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" "Shit. Third time that's happened"

They’re used to their little brothers borrowing stuff

To be fair, would you say no to Heracles?

Neat

Whoa!! Heracles split??

@@Shadow1Yaz Son of a god. Makes him half mortal, so his immortal half goes to Olympus

Now wait a second. if heracles' arrows went on to kill paris, how come his dead mortal half meets odysseus in hades when odysseus dies a long time after heracles. I guess that means he was just chilling down there until odysseus died.

@@okuyasuniijimura I don't think his arrows did that, wasn't it just his bow? Also that was Philoctetes' feat, even if he was using Heracles' gear

Not the snakes!

Correction baby heracled strighr up snapped both of their necks easily

He strangled them and snapped their necks off. METAL

@@BoostedMonkey05 Where does the snake’s neck end and their body begin?

@@beastmaster0934 the join that allows them to move their heads.

I love that series!

HA! XD I understood that reference! I also have the entire Riordan-verse books. Only Tower of Nero is left. (grin)

Oh GODS 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Percy Jackson is the best. Plus he has an awesome sense of humor!

Rafael Sierra Fun fact I’ve read the entire Heroes of Olympus series 3 times. Damn I love that series. Leo is the best.

oh i like that SO much better!!! Heracles: Hey um... can i borrow your dog? Hades: Oh yeah, he's due for his bicentennial walkies, can you handle that? Heracles: SWEET!

I'm trying to remember how it went in the story I heard it and I think it was something like: Heracles: Hey man can I borrow your dog? Hades: If you can tame him, yeah. Cerberus: >:( Hades: Walkies! Cerberus: :D

@@randomguy-tg7ok I think you mean Heracles: Hey man can I borrow your dog? Hades: If you can tame him, yeah. Cerberus: >:( >:( >:( Heracles: Walkies! Cerberus: :D :D :D

Yes, you're right, I do.

@@strideryourself EPIC CORRECTION, THANK YOU. XD

Hercules conquered and destroyed Troy already during his lifetime

Oh that would not be good-

most underrated comment XDDD

I can’t breathe omg

Way too underrated lmfao.

bAcK wHen tHe wORlD wAs nEw

This comment makes me want to break out in song

Three men~

Four men-

5 men*

Six men.

The Pillar Men... *plays theme song*

Kratos: Try me. 😡😠😠😠😠😠 Hera finally got what she deserved in God of War and DC's New 52 Wonder Woman. Kratos should have gouged her eyes like Poseidon. Apollo as the new king of the Gods banished her from the Mount Olympus to the Mortal realm and turned into a mortal. Funny because Hera messed with his mother and years later Apollo did the same thing to by making her a weaker being.

“Just let us compare our abs in private”

Poor thing was getting antsy and needed walkies.

He’s the more normal of the gods. Some are chill. He is plain and simply the nicer and reasonable one. Hell he probably has cause to feel sorry for Hercules since both have been screwed over by Zeus.

XD Not the Karen!

Who's Karen?

Haruka Gohdo it’s a joke. A “Karen” is the internet slang for a middle aged woman who is entitled and annoying. Like the “I want to speak to the manager” type of person. Usually they’re an anti vaxxer too.

Ajc 7575 😂

Wisteria Lycan al least they don’t have oil

Too bad Heracles had already gotten chastised for getting help.

That does actually make it funnier

Heracles probably would have died by then

From the source i read, Atlas actually was sincere and told Herc he wanted to be free but still wanted to help,and Herc complied,but still bails the guy

wait perseus turned atlas to stone but heracles was perseus's descendant, but atlas and heracles talked and atlas moved???

well to be fair she did so pretty creatively lol

That's the Disney version in the OG he was gonna cheat on his wife

What time stamp?

@@valenciageode25 5:40

They have priorities I guess

*" WOO-HOO! I LIKE TO MAKE SWEET MUSIC WITH HIS-"*

Isagail I already said that

also known as my 2nd fav movie right after tresure planet

You stole my comment before I even posted it!

Who put the "glad" in "gladiatooooor"? Not Heracles, because gladiators were Roman!

And now hade has more pets

Didn't Heracles help the gods fight Typhon? So.... Fate, I guess?

I can just imagine cerberus see his brother and sister and mom and dad at the gate and him try to make they have a place to stay because him a good boy and care about his mom and brother and sister

How did he kill Ladon if he didn't even go near him? Atlas got the apples for him.

@@videogollumer ye ol arrows dipped in Hydra venom. He killed Ladon. Then told Atlas he had the all clear. Did the "Hold the sky" trick. Then when Atlas got back he pulled the ol "Can you hold it while I set my cloak up as a pad" trick then legged it with the apples.

The last time Hera tried to outright defy Zeus, he hung her from the sky and used her as target practice until she _begged_ for mercy. I personally also imagine she screams at him a lot when he does this shit, but he basically just hears the noises the adults make in the Peanuts/Charlie Brown features.

@@balanc-joy9187 this sounds both funny and brutal-

@@maucazalv903 Yep.

Even worse she tied her daughter up to do that.

@@92JazzQueen tbf some versions put it more like Eileithyia is on her mother's side when it comes to Zeus's cheating. And so when Hera is like "I don't want you assisting X!" She's like "sounds cool. I'll go see what the muses are up to."

She did it twice- first time was with Artemis & Apollo's mother...

So she gave birth before the goddess of childbirth existed and still thinks someone can’t give birth without Ilythie ?

@@kono_dioda87 She's a goddess ^^

@Leviathan I mean if your husband constantly did the shit Zeus does so would you

@Leviathan Hera's like, one the first yanderes😂

that might have been overly sarcastic

To the song's credit, it's singing about Hercules, not HERAcles.

You can't be safe if you're alive

I think that's where Rick Riordan got the idea to make him a jerk.

@@cybersketcher1130 it's not far from the truth

It's like Uthgart-Loki and Thor, except Uthgart-Loki accidentally tricked Thor into doing some terraforming.

If Heracles wasn't a benevolent (for ancient Greek standards) himbo, Eurystheus would've gotten himself killed by angering the demigod.

Actually, it's because of the Italian live-action film released back in 1958 that started American body builder, Steve Reeves, as Hercules; in which the hero is referred to by the Roman name, yet Greek is used for everything and everyone else. Like Tarzan, Hercules had a whole bunch of live-action films before Disney got their hands on him; as such, Disney can't exactly be blamed for "lying" to us on that one.

Incest is Wincest, am I right?

And... this is surprising, how?

@@kamomile_tea just because it isn't surprising doesn't mean it isn't Disgusting and Creepy with a capital D and C.

@@Falxifer95 Totally man. Totally.

considering the god's track record, why are you surprised?

No Replies Here, I Wonder Why ?

Or a serial killer.

Ben Shapiro's wife.

Or a Cartoon Sniper Assassin in a popular video game.

@@Ananta9817 what?

Probably he was amazed Heracles could even _shoot_ the arrow that far. Like, he went "Aaaah, what was that? Oh, an arrow...wait a minute, _how_ did anyone shoot an arrow high enough to reach my chariot? Is a god down there, better check...nope, it's just Heracles...my goodness, he shot an arrow at me, and it almost _hit_ me?! What a strong young man, and he looks like he's hot down there in the desert, must've been why he tried to shoot me. Well, I'll go help him out!"

I mean, he IS an immortal being.

@@lukeroberson2115 and hera, godess of motherhood tried to smach a baby for being a bit toothy . . .

@@SingingSealRiana What? I just meant he wasn't worried about it killing him.

@@lukeroberson2115 does not mean he could not have been mortaly offended by the attempt

The Goddess of motherhood every one

Melani Potvin Same thing with Hephaestus

Oh so that's why she yeeted Hephaestus huh

Very beautiful

So... He married his half-sister?

@@AllonKirtchik i didn't know this was an anime

@@georgethompson913 Given that Hebe is the goddess of Youth, it's totally an anime. One of those little sister series. * Shudders violently *

Herc married the goddess of youth soooo....confirmed lolicon? Also it's Greek mythology: incest is a given when it comes to the gods.

Apparently he never actually completed the "Retrieve Golden Fleece" side quest either, given that they somewhat randomly ditch him pretty early on.

I assume it's the mythological equivalent of Wolverine or Spiderman making a quick guest appearance in someone else's comic to drive up sales.

I'm honestly not sure if substituting "literal" with "littoral" here is an accident or a really clever pun.

Yeah, that pretty much covers it! :D

Except Perseus is an exception as he doesn’t die horribly

Step 6: After you kill your hero, repeat step 4 and the first part of step 3. (Optional)

+Katt R. Revisions to Step 5: Make sure the hero dies a tragic, agonizingly painful death.

On step 1, let me just say that after all of the myths involving Zeus's progeny I typically divert from the cool, sage-like fearsome depiction of Zeus to a version of him that straight up would be the idol of Jiraiya from Naruto.

No not that that's not manlly

12 man

@Spearka No that's just gay

The entire sacred band of Thebes.

4 Chainsaws strapped to ceiling fans.

Friendly reminder that that is Cerberus' name if you translate it.

@@maaxorus technically it means spotted

@@zionnemakoma1398 Details...

Keep in mind that he may fight back so try to wrestle him down if he’s not cooperating.

Hades : make sure he avoids squirrels

Aku she mentioned this before in a different vid

AWWWWWWWWW... lol

she mentiod it once

Aku Awwww

who?? •_• Well.. He rarely did it

I remember that book!

Myth-O-Mania?

@@hansolo235 I don’t think so

Percy Jackson's Greek heros is the name

Was it published by Usborne? Because if it was, then I had that book, too.

AWAKEN MY MASTERS!

What's more masculine than trying to get a belt from a queen that could easily kill you but get laid by her instead.

@@chloerogers8841 A *KING*

300 SPARTANS!!!

WHATS MORE MASCULINE THAN THREE MEN?! *FOUR MEN!!!!!!!*

Hey, it could have been worse; I mean, what if Herc punched him hard enough to send him flying into the River Styx?

"I'm going to hide in this barrel like the wily fish." -Earth's greatest hero

Waaaittt…. *JAR?!*

Hercules: Yo Hades! You mind if I borrow Spot for a bit? Hades: Sure, no weapons tho. CQC only!

Hades has a dog, he must be a good god

Well, keep in mind, at the time, Heracles was mortal-ish. You don't want to piss off the guy who gets your soul when you're dead. Not sure if you know this, but Tartarus is a pretty terrible place, and the Greek gods have some VERY creative ways to punish people that end up there.

did anyone notice 2 of cerberus' heads were doing the tongue blep thing?

@@agungpriambodo1674 I remember in the latest Dresden Files book [spoiler warning] the MC gets wrapped up in a plot to steal from Hades (what could go wrong?) and just when they get into the vault and he's thinking "I hope Hades hasn't noticed us yet", he gets pulled into bullet time so Hades can have a quick word with him. Turns out Hades is pretty cool, the vault is actually just a holding cell for major relics until they're needed not a trophy room so Hades isn't going to smite anyone for robbing him, and the two bond over being the outsiders of their respective factions and how they both have a best-friend-dog.

Plot twist. HE *DID* AND THATS WHY HERACLES DIES

@@luvthecronch3542 OH GOSH-

@@shroomyruki2961 HUSBAND DESTROYER WAS APOLLO IN DISGUISE?!

@@luvthecronch3542 GASP-

I mean, they did fight this one time, I'm sure Apollo a least mildly enjoyed being tackled by him.

What is your source for this version ? What does Hercules' failure in the arts have to do with Hades' words in the first place?

Poor cerberus and hades

@@abobakrhassan2731 Not certain on the source myself, but Hercules's failure in the arts caused him to be unable to figure out exactly what Hades's poetic language meant, apparently.

@@redwitch12 You are not sure of the source because there is no source that mentions such a thing like that in the first place Secondly, I do not understand what you mean by the poetic language of Hades. Hades spoke in a natural language, and I do not recall the existence of any source linking Hades with poetry in the first place. You are confusing two events , everyone confuses them, Hercules never attacked Hades during the mission to bring the dog of the underworld, Hades and Persephone simply let him take him. Hercules attacked Hades in a separate event, he attacked Hades when the Hercules conquered the city of Plyos and Hades was one of the gods who defended the city, Hercules hit him with an arrow and made him retreat from the battlefield

@@abobakrhassan2731 I'm not the person who first offered the explanation, just someone trying to answer your earlier question using the information that the OP provided.

aetriv “go to hell and get me a b*tch” *hades returns with Cerberus* “aaaaAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!”

@@lordfelidae4505 Guy: This may been the best trade deal in the history of trade deals, maybe ever.

@@lordfelidae4505 *THE ABSOLUTE MADMAN HE ACTUALLY FUCKING DID IT*

Should be a cakewalk for him anyway.... since you know his uncle is the ruler of the underworld

@@shadowking1380 Well his brother is the god of war, another brother is the god of trickery, yet another one is the god of the forge, his sister is the goddess of wisdom, his dad is the king of the gods, and his younger uncle is the god of the sea. And those were just his relatives in the Pantheon I could still list off for days.

How about, "My kingdom for sunscreen?"...

That funny one-liner gets mind-flayingly terrifying once we absorb Red's analysis of her. Good thing she probably understood that, since gods can't get killed by such things, she could ignore his insolence. Especially since Hades probably diva'd it up and basked in her attention, distracting her from apocalyptic revenge for hurting her husband.

@@bluesbest1 people characterising hades as a soft boy poetry nerd is my favourite take

@@lewismartin3430 Yeah. Sure, he was one of the major players of the Titan War, rules his own kingdom, and can dish out all manner of horrific punishments, but he's utterly charming in all his myths and is utterly undisruptive, being a complete introvert down in the depths of the world. I'm genuinely jealous of his situation.

@@bluesbest1 he just does his job. loves his wife and his dog and leaves well enough alone

@@lewismartin3430 who needs kids when you can have a three headed dog anyways?

Fancy seeing you here. Have any of the Labors in your collection?

Three men maybe?

How about a Man inside of another Man. or Two men inside one man. So Manly!

RedGeoBlaze That's just sex :p.

MEN SQUARED

2-7 men. Anything above 7, and things start getting impractical, logistics-wise.

My favorite part is Hades' cryface as Persephone is patching him up. "He SHOT me! Right here! ;_;"

Also "MY KINGDOM FOR A JUICEBOX!"

...Welp, now I wanna see a retelling of the Heracles myths with Saitama as Heracles.

Most of his teachers were demigods too.

Sounds like my teen sister!

Honestly I wanted to do the same thing to my orchestra teacher in fifth grade like “COME ON IM FRICKING TRYING *sniff*”

I kind of derped for a second and thought you meant Madea from the Tyler Perry movies

Don't forget Medusa and a hero from the future

@danny5357 They never would have done that. H might have lost.

That being a plot point would be weird. Imagine someone trying to get her breast milk to get super powers. It's sounds like a messed up porno.

@Le Frog You're right, he rather watch then actually participate. It's his wife you know, that's messed up.

@@rogerogue7226 "What kinda weirdo bangs their wife? Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go turn into a ferret and put the moves on that little blonde number over there." ~Zeus, when questioned about his constant infidelity

A year late, but might I also point out that in some tellings, when Hera finally wrenched Heracles off her teat, milk sprayed out and the splattered droplets became the milky way.

That's greek mythology for you

"Here in the Underworld, we got a few rules that everyone follows: 1. We don't talk about Underworld. 2. We don't talk about Underworld. 3. No one leaves. 4. No perving on Persephone. And that's pretty much it. Follow these rules and you'll be fine."

Makes you wonder why the fuck people tend to paint him as a bad guy in modern Greek-Myth inspired literature... and then you remember that, oh yeah, he's literally a god of death and the afterlife and shit. That's plenty of reasons for them to do that.

The thing is...Hades is defacto one of the least selfish gods and one of the few gods that you can actually bargain with. Yes, he rules *over* the *under*world, but that doesn't make him bad at all, since the Underworld is where all dead mortals end up going after death. Hades in modern literature is just percieved as Greek-Satan, which pisses me off to no end. #HadesIsTheNiceOne

Poor Hades,bad boy in modern day,got shot by his nephew,messed only 2 people,DISNEY YOUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!

It's funny because Kerberus means spot

The man just can't catch a break

Where can I find a woman like that?

@@josephradley3160 well if it’s Greek Gods probably at a family dinner

@@cammagic8152 fair call.

@@josephradley3160 wait for your siblings first daughter to be born

the og himbo

I want so badly to give this a like but it's currently at 69 likes...

Something something something size something...

Welcome to the -internets- *Greek mythos*

Ramza Beowulf Sounds like a great deal to me

I’ve heard it described as the thirteenth Labour of Heracles. I bet there were quite a few labours after he was finished.

@@Dravoll Yeah. An italian writer described it as heracles's erotic adventure. Not that he hadn't banged a ton of people already...

Ramza Beowulf Actually, according to the Wikipedia article, he had *50* en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thespius So, yeah... damn...

@@RamzaBeowulf who? Maybe I know them

I'm more scared of Aphrodite, TBH. Hera's hot-button issues are usually pretty predictable: don't do anything to make Zeus horny and you're probably safe from Hera. Aphrodite, on the other hand, has about the same level of sadism in her punishments as Hera does and is also WAY easier to offend: if you're too pretty, not pretty enough, refuse to fall in love, fall in love with the wrong person, or otherwise embarrass her in some way, you're fucked.

@@josephrasche7194 "Don't do anything to make Zeus horny" includes breathing & existing while female. Hell, even being locked up in an underground cell won't keep you safe. Plus, I don't think Aphrodite has the methodical torture Hera specializes in. Aphrodite thinks short term. Hera plays the long game.

@DTOM Not necessarily. Memes aside, Zeus hasn't raped *every* woman in Greece: it's probably safe to assume that he only targets women who are especially attractive, important, or both. Those who are especially attractive can try to downplay their beauty, those particularly important are probably fucked but that's a fairly small minority of women because, well, this IS ancient Greece we're talking about. I still maintain it's a lot easier to avoid Hera's wrath than Aphrodite's, if only because with Hera's wrath you have one clear goal to work with while with Aphrodite, some of the things that piss her off are on opposite ends of the spectrum, leaving you to try and balance on a tightrope to avoid pissing her off. With Hera, you have more options; with Aphrodite, it's fairly likely that you'll try to downplay the thing she'd get pissed at but go too far in the other direction and piss her off anyway. Regarding the punishments, I think that Hera is only slightly more persistent than Aphrodite: most of the time, both of them will do one *really terrible* thing and then be satisfied. Hera's only ever gone beyond that a few times, Io and Heracles being the only exceptions I can think of, and Aphrodite isn't *that* far behind Hera given her persistent persecution of Psyche. Hera might have a slight edge in being willing to constantly torture a victim, but let's be real, nobody who gets on *either* one's bad side is coming out of it alive or happy unless some other god decides to intervene, and even that's not guaranteed.

I don't know, Dionysis is low-key terrifying. Being ripped apart by menaeds for basically no reason seems very unpleasant.

@@daviddaugherty2816 I'll take it over being strapped to a burning wheel for eternity.

Unknowingly because Hera tricked her

@@zainmudassir2964 didnt the centaur trick her??? Where was hera involved with that

He married the goddess Hebe after he became immortal.

@@isobelduncan who was also his half-sister. Blame Zeus for that

I don't know if anyone could read this but there is a part of the story when Heracles went to retrieved the Cereberus that he met his friends and fellow Argonauts, for example Meleager. Meleager asks Heracles to keep eye on his sister because he was worried about her. Heracles is the man with honor so after finishing all his labor, he went to see Deinara and took her as his wife instead though, Meleager warned him. This explained how Deinara and Heracles met.

@ The outro song is Red's rendition of the theme tune from... some 70s tv show.

In Herc's defense, that was Hera's fault

Orion_Qc Constellation And always have some sort of ID test before sleeping with "your husband", as he might actually be Zeus in disguise.

Never sleep with animals, they're normally Zeus in disguise

Not that you'd have a choice though.

Pretty sure that was basic knowledge in Ancient Greece since Zeus had to constantly change forms.

"Don't sleep with Greek gods!" Zeus: -turns into gold or a swan or any number of things- consensual sex was never an option

His cousin's name is Eurystheus