I moved back with my parents at 30 after ending a long term relationship and then losing my job a week later. I’m about to turn 33 and just bought my own home, by myself. Moving home, whilst hard - especially the 2 hour commute each way to work, was the best decision I ever made. I am so grateful I had a safe, secure space to call home which gave me the opportunity to turn my life around. I wouldn’t have been able to do that without them.
i'm so so happy to hear you were able to turn your life around...what an inspiration. and yes, i wouldn't have had the opportunity to learn more about myself while dealing with so many life changes either, if not for my parents being in my corner. so much gratitude to them...
@@ArtIsDrawing agree. But it’s not just young people that get caught up. I was 26 when I entered that relationship. We moved in together when I was 27, and I had experiences in both having housemates and living alone for years before that. Sometimes relationships just don’t work out. It was bad luck I got made redundant so soon after ending the relationship, but it also gave me a handy excuse to be the one to move out of our rental property. I would not have been able to buy a house if I was still paying rent, especially when I live in one of the top 10 least affordable major cities in the world.
Congrats, but sounds like you had a lot of savings or somebody gave you a lot of money. Otherwise there's no way you could have afforded a house in that amount of time, especially considering what happened to the housing market in those specific years.
it’s often comforting to see people older than 25 moving back with their parents etc.. as a 23 year old moving back in with my own parents and not knowing what to do with my life and not in school etc… just knowing that it’s ok to not knowing what/how to do it
just an advice, now that you have the option to pick a career to start, make sure you pick one that has a future or one that you really like, or both would be even better. i've seen and known many people who picked a career that has no good future and the worst part is some of them don't even like the job they do, and they live a miserable life.
I moved back at 27. I lived in a big city and felt constantly exhausted. Nothing worked back then, my life, my job and my love life. My parents asked me if i wanted to move back and i did. It's been 3 months and i do really enjoy it. I told my mom that i don't feel exhausted anymore. I do have plan to move out someday, probably next year. But i am gonna make the best of it to really heal myself
I know SO WELL how you feel. 2020 I was visiting my family in the Netherlands, from Edinburgh Scotland- where I was living at the time. Ofc covid happened. So I couldn't go back. It felt like a mourning period. Then, as things started opening up again, I had just started a new job in NL, I got very sick. Caused me to have to move back in with my parents at 27. Now, I just turned 30 last week and I'm still here. Still sick, still feels like life stands still. Sometimes life just doesn't happen as we think it would. And seeing friends settling down can make you feel quite lonely. But you're definitely not alone! And I'm very thankful for you sharing your story so I feel less alone too. Thanks Evelyn🤍✨️🍀
sending big hugs to you...I'm sorry you lost so much to COVID and sickness. It's a big loss, and too often we forget to give our losses enough acknowledgement and grief. please take all the time you need to mourn, nest, and heal. i'm rooting for your to enjoy all the beauty and love in your life ahead✨
This happened to me too! Visiting my parents after living in Spain and I got stuck! Took a job while I waited for covid (also a career path I didnt anticipate). Similar to your illness, some life events happened that kept me living with them. You are not alone in this and I hope you know that theres always people out there happy to support and listen. I am hopeful for change, I am 31 now and although I live in the town near my parents I moved out. I am slowly making friends and forming a community. Still not sure what my career looks like but I have so much belief that I am exactly where I need to be right now.
@@emilykromalic7149 This is all so reassuring - I'm trying to figure out my career path now too and still living at home which has made me SO SO depressed it's unreal. Thank you everyone for sharing your stories.
@@emilykromalic7149 Emily, your words touched me so much. Making friends and forming a community at a new (old) place, at your hometown where you feel like a stranger - that speaks to me a lot. It also sounds very calming in a way. That’s what still ahead of me - moving to my hometown to live closer to my family after traveling the world and trying to settle down in Scotland. Going back is my conscious decision, however I still have a mountain of doubts and uncertainty. We don’t choose a family but I realized it’s a treasure to stay close to people connected to me so deeply, watch them growing, enjoying simple moments together, being there when they need me, get known my roots. Do I miss something else not moving abroad? What supports me a lot is the idea to stay myself whenever I am, not to think of myself as a failure. Starting with a blank page is hard, working with what you already have (which most of people do) isn’t easier, creating a live you want to live is hard no matter where you start from, so any experience makes us stronger and gets us closer to our true self if we practice acceptance and appreciation of beauty. That’s what I see this vlog is about 🤍
I'm so with you about the anxiety from uncertainty. I quit my job as a senior tax analyst last year and am trying to pivot my career to a totally different field. I'm 31. Still don't have a house, a stable career, or anything I feel sure of. But life is about moving on. Let's look back at our journey when we turn 80 and smile.
I'm exactly where you are as well. Quit a long established career for something I'm more passionate about. It's a tough transition, but I'm glad I've done it
I am in the EXACT same position as you. I have been teaching for the past 5 years, and I guess always knew it wasn't truly for me. I am in the process of transitioning into a design field and applying out, etc. and my self doubt is not only at an all time high, but other life factors like giving up the stability of a teaching career, along with no house of my own, relationship, etc. has really been affecting my mental health. But I am trying so hard to remind myself of the suffering we need to do now so that we can live a life with no major regrets later.
I feel you! I’m 34 this year and just moved back in with my parents. To be honest, it’s was great until it wasn’t. But as I have more awareness now, I am able to observe myself and the patterns in me created from my childhood. Whatever that had happened though it wasn’t pleasant, helped me to know myself better and hopefully break out of that. I hope you have a great time with your parents, but if things doesn’t go well, please also extend grace and compassion to yourself! ❤ rooting for you!
I moved back in with my parents at 27 and went back to school to get a degree in a field that actually interested me. I often feel insecure about it but it's so nice to see I'm not alone in this experience! It's been 3 years and I'm still living with my parents but I'm trying to just be grateful and not worry too much about the future. I believe everything will work out in the end :)
hey evelyn,, this vlog gives me such a big assurance on few things goin on in my life. I'm 26, left my job, even my MBA and came back to my parents home so that i can restart. I went back to university at 26, and that completely emptied my savings.. so i have no other choice than depending on my parents financially. Started therapy as well, while doing lot of things, university, youtube, coaching, content creation and what not,, and still my revenue is not consistent... depending on my family also feels like a burden... And for past few days I have been questioning how I have been living my life.. but this vlog made me feel like "'that falling apart is part of figuring out life❤" And I cant be more thankful for you!!
I’m 33 and in a similar position! After the pandemic I knew I didn’t want to be doing what I was doing so I quit and started taking admin and caregiving jobs just to tread water. Then in October I couldn’t take my toxic boss anymore and quit without a plan. I spent a month soul searching and being depressed (maybe still am). I moved back with my parents in December and have been blowing through my savings because there isn’t much demand for temporary admin assistants. I picked a new tentative career path but the training program doesn’t start until May. I feel like my life has been on hold for these last 6 months as I DoorDash while I wait to start the training program. I have been struggling with not getting enough alone time and worrying that I have chosen the wrong path again. So it’s reassuring to know that I am not alone and that while it currently feels like I am not making progress, sometimes you have to step backwards to go forward. 😊
Thank you for saying that "you are exactly where you need to be in life", I really needed to hear that! I love your videos and I'm totally rooting for you!
I found your channel late last year. At the time, I was dying to leave my corporate job as it was sucking the life out of me. I left it December and began my new career it the veterinary field. I make much less money and but feel so much better even with the uncertainties my new path has, similar to you.
About moving back with parents: I confirm all the things you said! Had to move back at 37 and I felt like a failure… instead it was perfect for healing my inner child and boost my self-work in therapy. I would not have had so many results without going back there and face my past self! Trust the process ❤❤
I just turned 29 two weeks ago & moved back in with my parents a month ago to have a chance to start over after a traumatic situation. Just trying to get grounded & to feel safe again. Completely understand the feeling anxious about the uncertainty of the future or not even having an outlook of it.
this vlog was super comforting to watch! my mom passed away 3 years ago and she was a single mom to 5 children, so the responsibility to take care of my siblings (still teenagers) fell on me as the eldest sister at only 23 years old. i’m 26 now but i’ve been feeling “stuck” for the longest time because the life i envisioned for myself couldn’t be more different. i’d wanted to start living alone, travel, explore while i was still young-but with the sudden responsibility of being a “mom,” i have no choice but to stay in our family home. i see my friends living their life to the fullest and often compare my life to theirs, feeling like i’m being left behind somehow. i hope you find what you’re looking for in this period of change. 🤍
sending you so much love...i'm so sorry your choice of living a life of adventures was taken away from you, on top of the loss of your mom...in the face of a deep tragedy you gave love forward - that is an admirable and noble choice. you are not left behind🤍
@@alayapaperblooms I agree with @tapiocapress, it's probably not what you envisioned for yourself, and I'm sure you have to face all kinds of hardships in such a situation - you can be very proud of yourself! But you won't regret doing all that, believe me. Soon your siblings will be adults themselves and you all can go explore what the world has to offer separately and yet "together"! Allow yourself to feel as young as you are once you're free to do what you like! I'm in my 30's now but mentally I'm still in my 20's, I only started to really explore life these past three years or so. Before that I was stuck in all kinds of loops. I only now have the courage to develop dreams for my future, that I'm sure others had decades ago - but it's ok. I appreciate myself and my own journey and it's not always smooth sailing but that's life 🙃💓
I recently moved back in with my parents at 28 years old after my life partner left me and i couldnt afford to figure out staying where i was by myself. Being back here after a decade has been really hard on top of all of the emotional struggles I'm going through right now. Thanks for this video. It's good to know that there are other people in similar circumstances. It's been hard not to feel like a failure. Thanks for sharing this
Me and my son also had to move back in with my parents five years ago when I was 29 during my divorce & we have been trying to get into our own place ever since but it is so hard. I wish you the best of luck on your journey & you do whatever you need to do to better yourself🙏🏼💕
Your ending comment really resonated with me. I lost my job and broke up with my fiance, decided to take a career break and still living with my ex, making very slow transition to move back to my parents but dreading it as there's just too much to unpack there. Really appreciate your videos as they feel real, a lot of people don't understand how complex it is so it's difficult talking about it to friends and family that are 'on the right track' whereas I'm 'on the right track' but just very different one.
Thank you Evelyn :") You have no idea how much this video spoke to me. I'm 27 and I've been rationalizing my decision about wanting to move to Paris because I wanted to make a relationship work, but ultimately things fell through and our priorities to find success in our lives individually led to a break up recently because I couldn't give her the support she needed and loved her in ways she found confidence to build a future together. I live in Singapore, and due to the cost of housing its normal and practical for people to live with their family/parents right up to their 30s. Your content has been so relatable in the ways I've been feeling so much anxiety and worry in my abilities to find happiness and success in this life. I admire your courage to make that shift and to challenge social norms. I wish that I could continue to be as brave as you are, and seeing you normalize those feelings of uncertainty makes me feel real, more human. Thank you
I love what you said about taking a step back might be a step forward in disguise. This really resonated with me as I'm thinking about making a big change in my life, which could imply temporarily moving back in with my mom. Thank you ❤
I've moved back in with my parents between 2022 and 2023 for a while and while it wasn't the greatest time of my life (i related a lot to you saying we change back into our childhood selves there), it was what I needed at that time and it prepared me for the great things that followed. good luck for your time with your parents and your way to berlin 🥰
“So we don’t live a life that’s justifiable to others, with something missing in our own hearts”. Courage Evelyn, you’re killing it ! I moved back with my parents for nearly 2 years at the same age. It was ultimately therapeutic. And a great foundation for what was next. We’re all here like you said, where you need to be ❤
I’ve never felt so seen! Thank you for documenting this stage of your life. Specially the part about wanting to move somewhere and not wanting to deal with it being taken away because you can’t stay. Moving with parents is never easy and it’s something I recently had to do myself but I am choosing to trust this is where I am supposed to be right now.
We all are scared in our own ways, but the thought that we might be struggling alone is the biggest fear, according to me. So, watching vlogs like this gives a sense of hope when we most need it. Thank you so much for this. Everything gets better
Thank you for catching up with us 🧡 Having seen your vlogs I think I have an idea why Dave wants to go to Berlin, but I have a feeling you'll like the city as well! I hope you'll have a good time staying with your parents and that everything will work well with the visa process. Take care 🌻
Dear Evelyn, your channel is the best thing I've found on RU-vid, really. I came across it around the time I quit a highly stressful job that was making me miserable, and you made me feel so much better about my anxiety that came with being unemployed for months. I have since found a new job that does have its challenges, but makes me much happier. I wish the best for you in this new chapter of your life. Hang in there ! x
Like so many, moved back with my mum at age 31 after long term relationship breakup. It’s now nearly 3 years later and I’m still here as actually buying as a single person with the market at present means over half my wage would go on a mortgage, plus all the extras. But if there is one thing I have learnt it’s that If there’s one thing I learnt it’s that everything in life, EVERYTHING is transient. Since moving back I have the best possible relationship with myself and a much better relationship with a wonderful guy. I’m 10x more appreciative of the small things.
You are not afraid to show how you feel about being an ordinary person. No one's perfect and thank you for sharing. I always remember what I'm taking for granted is what others wish for. Stay safe😊
In tears on the last part about feeling like life is taking steps back, but they may be actually helping me take steps forward. I really needed this today. FYI I have moved back home multiple times as an adult - between uni degrees even if it was for a few months, in my mid/late 20s until 30, then back at 31 after I was in danger, out again at 33, and now in my late 30s due to illness, the conversation to go home has come up many times...I'm resisting as it's best for my mental health to stay on my own, but the deep gratitude to know I have that option is very present.
sending big hugs to you...the fact that our family will always be there for us is really a deep blessing, and should never be taken for granted. even the gratitude for them in itself helped carry me through so many difficult moments. i'm rooting for you, and proud of you too:)
you gained a follower with this video. the outro seemed like you were filming something that you would want to hear too.. and i love that for you just as much as i love that you were vulnerable enough to share this with us too!
As always I loved everything about this video - your vulnerability and thoughtfulness are thought-provoking and inspiring. I am so grateful to have found you and that you are creating on RU-vid! I appreciated you talking through the complicated feelings of moving to Berlin because it's where Dave wants to go, and on moving in with your parents - how you are grateful to have the option, but how it comes with its challenges around personal growth and how others might perceive you. At the end of the day trust yourself and your instincts. If something feels right to you you don't need to justify it to anyone. I'm sure that whatever path you take there will be beauty and joy in it, and you'll learn something helpful for the next phase of your journey.
I have been an international student in the US for the past 8 years & just moved back with my family. Even though I don't have to pay rent/groceries, I still pay with my mental health haha. Thank you for making this series!
when I moved to Berlin, I have been so excited. Went to museums and art shows 1-2 per week. Over the years I got used to it though :-) and also a lot of my favorite places vanished or : perished due tue gentrification, air b nb, etc. pp lets not forget rents skyrocketed plus there are a looot of applications for every flat. So I moved just outside the city walls to enjoy a big flat with lots of nature around. But i still remember the excitement of first moving here!
@@tapiocapress its still only 30 min to Berlin Mitte or Prenzlauer Berg by train though- its definetely worth it! You could visit a new exhibition/ show everyday and still would not be finished after a year :-)
Oh how do I understand you babe. I, too, moved back in with my parents after I left my high paying city corporate job and it felt like such a failure. That was also the time I found your channel so needless to say that I felt so seen. There is something so special about having a place where you can take it easy, work on yourself, and your future, and be safe. I hope everything goes well for you, and also let those chaotic, stressful, difficult times be present on the vlogs,we don’t mind ❤
Wild, I'm also 29 and very heavily considering moving back in with my parents on the other side of the country. I lost my job about a month ago and also don't really have any friends or support system where I am, and it seems like life is pushing me in that direction - similarly opening doors to pursue my own creative life vs working for someone. Crazy how things like this show up in the algorithm, thanks for making this. Helps ease some of the feeling of failure and uncertainty
1000% can relate. Being able to find our own path is scary but i have faith it will be one full of beautiful scenery. Can’t wait for your digital nomad vlogs :)
Hello Evelyn, I wanted to tell you I love your videos, totally relate to them, and hope you stay strong! I think lots of people don't have life figured out either and have their own struggles, but we only see a curated version of life and create expectations based on that. I am also from an Asian family, work a fast paced job and struggle with tying my identity to academic and now career success. I also relate to your struggles about uncertainty and geography, as my partner works overseas (in his second country in three years), and while I am fortunate to be able to visit him frequently and work remotely during these visits, I also struggle with the open endedness that the LDR has no end in sight, whereas permanent relocation would mean giving up my career / identity / family. The constant travel also takes a toll because sometimes routine and familiarity and just having /friends/ and a community is something I never realised was so important. I watch your videos while I take my lunch breaks alone as I work from his apartment in a foreign country, and it makes me feel like there's someone there with me. I hate commenting on videos because I'm always scared that someone I know will see these things, but I wanted you to know if you read this that you're not alone, and that your videos have improved someone's life in some way. I have decided for now to take life one month / year at a time, and take it as a big adventure, even though it's easier said than done!
thank you so much for sharing…I teared up reading your story. sometimes life doesn’t have answers and all we can do is take it one month/year at the time. I’m grateful for the journey and the wonderful people along the way. we are not alone🤍
Wish you the best of luck. I definitely agree that some things that might seem like a step backwards can really be a step forward in disguise. If you ever are feeling lost or feel like you aren't progressing in life, try and think back to how much things have changed in the past 6-12 months alone, don't forget it's okay to be proud of yourself, you should be ^^ Been following since you've had only 2 or 4k or so, and look at you now... Keep it up, looking forward to watching your journey unfold.
I’m 34 and moved back home. After an exhausting long term relationship I’m glad I did. Now I’m just saving like crazy and glad my family gave me the opportunity to do so. Now I can focus on more important things like healing and growing out of some terrible things that I did and making some dreams come true in the process. YOU GOT THIS and don’t let the outside pressures of you going back home make you feel less than human. ❤
Also kuddos for moving back to your parents. I fully broke ties with my dad which was the best decision ever and it pushed me to move forward no matter what.
you know what, you're doing great because you have had a career and still have something going that you're passionate about, and most importantly, a supportive family. i still haven't moved out at 31, even though i just started a career and will be moving out soon.
Welcome to Berlin! I left home and never came back in my late teens, but I strive to be the type of parent to whose house a child would want to return to if they are in need one day. It is truly a blessing to have somewhere to land. I live in Berlin for 10 years and although I’m perfectly settled and not going anywhere I have mixed feelings about it 😁 I believe it is an adult entertainment wonderland, but I found having a family here and raising children very challenging. Life is difficult in different ways everywhere though.
Been wanting to comment on your videos for some time. Your videos always brighten my day as I (feel) am in a very similar place in life as you. Difference is that you have the guts to do something about it. I am encouraged by each video you make that you, and anybody talking the leap of escaping the ray race, will come out better. All the best and please keep the wonderful content coming! (It’s my own strange form of escapism)
I just want to say this, I really love your channel (especially Hong Kong vlog a few months ago✨) and we can see that you put a lot of attention to detail in your editing. Great branding over the years! Be confident that what you are doing is worthwhile. big love from Japan💟
It’s a blessing if your family was positive and welcoming about it and not stress you out and criticize you for your decisions in life. There’s definitely a cloud of negativity that looms here and there as someone that is in this phase too but I’m just staying silent and wait for my time to reap what I have sown~
I'm 34. I have 2 boys. I moved back with my dad after my marriage concluded. It was the best decision I have ever made. My children love being around my parents (my mom lives close by). I take care of most of the financial responsibilities. I actually having a hard time finding reasons to move out again... 🙂
I feel you connect to people's internal lives - like folks can see what it'd be like if they exercised some of the less-mainstream life options that are possible.
Am nearly middle aged and still living with my parents. No shame as long as you or they aren't sick of you lol. Just ensure you help around the house and help pay bills. Once you have your life together again and feel the confidence and are ready, you can always try moving out again some other time. Life is a toughie.
All the best for your next endeavor. Your closing message and remarks speaks volumes and I really can reasonate to it. Choose what’s best for you but not how people will view it. Takes lot of courage but one step at a time. ❣️
I really liked this video Evelyn, as someone who moved back in with my mom it's very relatable. You are exactly where you need to be! What a fantastic message :)
I maybe really know what you feeling ,even though it's not have really same feeling.Your words carry such power: 'As we grow older, returning to our parents' home seems to become a shameful act.' I feel like I see countless versions of myself in that. I enjoy listening to you speak; it really gets my gears turning. Here's to us all living life freely and unapologetically!
And I would like to collaborate with you, which I hope will help you in your life to some extent.Please check your email if you're also interested in it.
I couldn't help clicking the like btn and leaving a comment on this glorious video(Even though I'm not good at English, sorry if there are any mistakes in my comment). It's not enough to say thank you because it gave me a true comfort and cheered me up. Thank you so much for telling me 'I'm where I need to be in my life'. Now I'm not that anxious anymore because I'm heading to a step forward. This kind words made my day and it's going to make my life.
I relate all of your concerns. I've lived abroad and had to move back home with my parents a few times. It was hard, but I also finally made steps to hopefully be able to be a long-term step forward... one day, maybe! I'm fairly new to your channel, but I really like your videos, keep it up - and good luck on your new adventure!
you're exactly where you need to be - is the cover of my phone case and i hold on to it dearly. we are all where we need to be, no matter it is. and things will definitely will be ok, rooting for you and all the subsribers!
You are so blessed and lucky to have caring parents that support you! mine wont offer me to stay with them...kind of sad to think that I have no one except but me as a support system, emotionally and physically, but it´s ok I have become very strong!
There's nothing wrong moving back in your parents' place. The situations vary. For example, with cost of living becoming too expensive to the point that even having a career job is not making enough, moving back home to your parents can help you financially and even mentally. It's a blessing in disguise -- you not only have saved more money, but you also get to spend some time with your parents while they're still here. You also can help around the house as they get older. And if you even have your own family, your parents can even spend some time with the children.
Combined my start-over in life, together with re-bonding with my 72 year old dad, when I was 45. We had a golden time, and I got the chance to rebalance my life. Your personal journey is everything but linear, some steps dosen´t make sense until much later.
I resonated so much with your chat about anxiety and RU-vid 🥲 I also finally gave myself permission to pursue content full time last year and even though prepared myself (logically) for the struggles, I still regularly question my decisions whenever my channel isn’t growing as quickly as I’d like. ANXIETY all the time lmao. PS. I think I remember you mentioning ADHD in a past video-chronic anxiety surrounding decision making is a classic symptom! Just FYI
moving back to your parents is so hard. my sister also moved back in with my mom and it's been hard for her because my mom started treating her like a child again while she already had her own life and way of doing things. i hope you find lots of friends in berlin😌 i'm sure you can connect with other youtubers and your viewers there
i remember watching your bejing vlogs and then discovering your lockdown diaries from shengyan, so now it kinda feels like things coming full circle for your channel 🙂 which at the same time feels like a start of a new circle, yay! excited to see how everythings goes! best of luck 🥰
I hope everything becomes good for you ❤ love you. Love to watch your journey ❤ maybe you should think like “this is going to be second chance build bond with my parents” ❤ Please upload more and stay positive ❤
I was 23 when I moved back home to live with my parents after graduating and unable to find a job for 2 years. And then, when I did find a job, it was low pay and I couldn't afford to move out. Now I'm 33, I have a much better job, but still cannot afford to buy a home. I'm glad my parents have stuck with me for so long, and thankful that they are so good to me. As such, I pay for all their expenses and vacations (still less than paying for rent where I live, much less). One day, I hope to save enough money to buy my own home and finally move out (though, because I'm Chinese, and the youngest, they will likely move in with me in the new home anyways, except instead of living with them, they will be living with me).
Hi! Last year I finished my studies and decided to move back with my family because I want to change careers.. Sometimes it feels like a step back BUT it’s been great to have this family time and also some healing! Right now I feel a little bit in a limbo so I’m ready to move on and work on my future, so I’m planning to leave again. It’s definitely challenging to be back but NO DECISION IS FOREVER! If you want, leave your hometown and you’ll be fine 😊
Hi Evelyn. I just found your channel, and relate alot. I knew I'd subscribe when i seen your Patti Smith Just Kids book, and you said you had lived in Chicago. Chi-Town is were I'm from. Living with your parents now you should take every opportunity to make memories because parents don't last forever and everyone comes to the point when they look back and wish they had done more with family, and documented it for posterity. Anyway, love your chanel and will be watching and likeing.
