It's absurd how OP had to time and time again explain to commenters that he didn't expect an apology from his gf for reacting the way she did when her daughter first said that she had been SA's by OP, but rather for how dismissive and uncaring she was after the daughter admitted to lying. She didn't give a sh*t that OP's life had almost been irreparably destroyed. If she is that unbothered by false SA accusations then OP is not safe around her. She's not a good person if she thinks that being falsely accused of SA can be dismissed with a shrug of the shoulders which essentially means "you were cleared of the accusations, get over it". An absurd lack of empathy. It feels like she was only with OP for his resources.
But what if he WASN'T cleared? Imagine what his life would have become. Clearly, OP'S GF didn't care one way or another about the outcome. Such a lack of empathy is not only concerning, it's dangerous. I wouldn't trust her OR her spawn from this point on. Besides, since a mere accusation didn't work THIS time, what's to stop his girlfriend's ex from showing his daughter how to provide "evidence," in order to ensure prosecution, and possibly imprisonment? It's not worth the risk.
I was thinking the exact same thing (about him having to repeat himself no less than 500 times) simply because they lack reading comprehension. Yes…she is a child and of course is immature but 13 is still old enough to know better. There needs to be consequences so she doesn’t go around the rest of her life thinking it’s ok to falsely accuse someone of something so serious and possibly life ending. It really doesn’t take much to completely destroy someone’s life. Hell…in fact…it’s actually really easy too. But if she gets a free pass one time…she’ll think it’s ok and that she’d never have to take accountability or face the consequences of her words/actions and will grow up thinking she can get away with pretty much anything/everything
Let’s just remember that OP is also a victim. Every job I’ve ever applied to doesn’t ask have you been charged with anything having to do with SA NO it asks have you ever had SA allegations legally made about you. It can still ruin his life and career
Honestly fully agree with OP. The Mum did do the initial right thing, prioritise getting her daughter out of a potentially dangerous situation and contact authorities to find the truth. Which they did. But after the truth came out the first thing she said should have been "I'm so sorry this happened, I'm sorry Daughter said something so terrible about you, I had to be sure but that must have been terrifying for you and I'm sorry for that" like, acknowledging that something really terrible happened and expressing sympathy that he was the one wronged by it. And she definitely has stuff to apologise for! Not for taking the steps she needed to take to make sure her child was ok, that was understandable and the best course of action, but manipulated or not the daughter DID do something wrong and there should have been apologies for that.
she a kid but shes 13 and should know what's wrong from right and if she wants her dad in her life so bad she can live with him and see how she gets treated
"your gf does not owe you an apology", if she so feels responsible enough towards her daughter to feel that she HAS to trust her over anyone else, then she is ALSO responsible for that trust leading her wrong. She does owe OP and apology so does the daughter. Frankly speaking just like there is a SA registry/list, there should also be one for fake SA claims and the daughter should be put on. It is not a laughing matter either way, when it happens or when it is a fake allegation. Its sad that one is taken seriously the other isnt.
Should have filed a defamation, harassment and false allegation lawsuits naming the father and the daughter! Press charges on the false allegations. Now file a restraining order against the father. Letting him off the hook is not good as he will continue this behavior.
You'd never get your legal fees back and he wouldnt stay in jail long, if at all, and being in jail obviously isnt that much of a deterrent for the ex.
@@anon4854 The issue is to get him arrested and on his record! The ex has a history and with each arrest he has every time the police come his way. His life gets harder. Also, going after the father like that makes life far easier for the mother to get the father out of the daughters life who clearly needs to be away from him.
for a defamation claim to actually go through. You have to prove that it caused damage to your reputation. I don't think that is provable in the slightest, sorry. Correct me if I'm wrong
That is for a court to decide. Also it doesn’t just have to be harassment or defamation. It can also be added that emotional damages can be pursued as well! Pushing false charges and the admitted lie by the daughter is more than enough. People and corporations have been sued and lost on far less.
Also, the gf and daughter owe him an apology! As a parent you are responsible for the actions of your child!! You as a parent have a strong teaching moment, you take them and make them accountable, apologize and punish them accordingly! This is missing big time with parents today! They act as if they aren’t responsible and accountable for their kids!
These kind of allegations are crazy toxic,if they get out AT ALL they will never die and you can never get washed clean. Some appreciation for how badly you life was almost destroyed isnt really asking for that much
Okay the gf did what she did to protect her daughter and don’t want to apologise, but she knows what kind of a person her ex husband is (as said by OP @ 4:54), shouldn’t she protect her from him first? Like he used his own daughter as a pawn of his evil scheme. He must have explained/discussed with her minor daughter about SA 🤢 Also she should at least make her daughter apologise.
Exactly. She needs to face some sort of consequence because if she doesn’t…it sets a very dangerous precedent. She will grow up thinking it’s ok to do that kinda shit and ruin a person’s life…all because she wasn’t made to be held accountable or face any real consequence. It’s all too easy to completely destroy a person’s life and she knows it. 13 might still be a child but that doesn’t change the fact that she is old enough to know better and face actual consequences. She needs to be made to realize just how dangerous, stupid, and severe what she did was.
@@karishma_k I have two 13 year old nieces and they both watched this and they both said it was absolutely screwed up to do that to a person that did absolutely nothing to deserve it and being 13 isn’t a child anymore…it’s a teenager and teenagers definitely know right from wrong and also is part of the reason a lot of kids who actually are being abused are too scared and refuse to report their own abuse.
@@karishma_k I think it’s absolute bs when people say “they’re just a kid” to excuse bad behavior. Like…”Ok…at what point do you start correcting said behavior?”
It’s her job to protect her daughter and your job to protect you 😂 she’s done off…ur gf is Sickk too, consequences should’ve been given to the daughter the moment they found out and solidified Op was innocent
OP is definitely owed an apology from both. I understand the mother needs to get answers, but how about answers from her daughters father and hold that BASTARD accountable for trying to damage another man's life.
Why is this guy even letting it get to relationship level with a single mother? They are good for smash and dash, but the desperate guys let it turn into more, then they get themselves into situations like this. Weekend getaway? Nope, she has kids. Impulsive night out on the town? Nope, she has kids. Intimate dinner with the lights down low tonight? Nope, she has kids. When her kid needs something and the mom doesn't have the money at that moment, is she going to ask the kid's father? No, she's going to ask you. And if you find yourself making a post on Reddit because you got falsely accused of SA, well, you can't say you weren't forewarned.
If my daughter says something like that.. Obviously I would trust her rather than my boyfriend. Yah it might seem harsh... But I am not taking any risks with a predator.... Even if he is innocent i wouldn’t take any chance. Also.. I 100% understand OP. They should just broke it off... Their relationship is already done.. Somethings cannot be forgotten.
The problem is not that,the problem is that you state that you would categorize your man as a horriable things without proof or hessitation in-advance and saying that he is still those things even if innocent
people keep saying the mom did the right thing and doesn't owe him anything........she believed her daughter and said she would do it again........the mother was/is totally in the wrong and deserved to get her ass dumped and thrown out.......he did the right thing and in the same situation i would dump her ass too......she should have believed him when he said nothing happened until it proven otherwise........the major thing i disagree with him on is him saying he doesn't blame her for taking her daughters side but he should.......if i was in this same situation i would demand respect from my girlfriend in my own home.......also she believer the daughter and seriously thought he did these things to her and there is no coming back from this on her part...........he said he can't never trust the daughter again but he can't and never should trust the girlfriend again either.....
Brother... Why wouldnt you belive your own child about SA? The mother did the right thing. He also did the right thing. The only mistake this guy made was dating a Single mother... Most important living with her and her child.
