The best thing a man and woman can do. Sit down across from each other and be civilised in their disagreement, in order to grasp the reality of the situation.
Taufeeq Fakir provided the woman respect the husband and the husband love the wife . once that’s out of the way, everything else is possible and Most importantly, Understand each other’s love languages .
@@adedoyin3336 love languages is a thing made by a misogynistic white supremacist preacher purposefully to enforce nuclear family BS and also to make a ton of money.
@@joi12345678 Now that was my POWERFUL !! WHO WANTS SOMEONE TO BE FAKE AND PHONY WITH THEM !! What this woman is doing which I dont respect is equivalent to a man asking a woman to fake a orgasm !! Who does it BENEFIT your both still EMPTY living a LIE !!
There is so much to unpack. Where do I being: 1. They are listening to each other (actively). 2. They affirm each others opinions/thoughts. 3. They are not yelling/speaking aggressively. 4. They see each other. 5. They compromise.
She's saying that he fakes a smile all day with his white boss at work, so why can't she get that same smile instead of the anger and frustration. He pretends to be meek and agreeable around white people. He says that fake meekness is how he manages to keep the job and provide for them. That fake smile pays their rent.
@@shanielswaby3591Baldwin was talking about needing to work to provide for his wife and kids (e.g., get paid so he can pay rent). he needs to smile at work - essentially appease his employers - in order to do this. but it’s a performance, a taxing one. but also, in his view, a necessary one so that he can continue being employed and provide for his family. hence why his smile is the price for the rent.
It’s manipulation. She’s saying that so she can get her way. She wants her imaginary world, in which her man that fakes it with her and gets fired for being real at work, magically finds a way to pay the rent. It’s manipulative and childish because women like her are the same ones that complain when the bills aren’t getting paid. Then it’s BE A MAN AND GET A JOB!
The Queen has spoken. This is the first time I ever saw Baldwin at a lost for words. He's usually the one dominating a debate. Nikki said I love my brother but I'm going to have the floor today. Watch me go off. Lol. I'm in love with these type of black minds.
I don't think it was a loss for words it was a logical response and she didn't understand it because she was in her feelings about it. This was an awesome convo of Feelings and logic at it's best.
that is because she has hope and wants things to improve as they have done. he still has hate and anger and a chip and wants thing not to change for all. he wants the white people of 1971 to go through what black people did up until then.
@@albundy8192 Yea, I don't think that's the case. If that's what he wanted, he sure as hell didn't want it for the white men that he exclusively dated. I am not sure what country you live in, but things in America have not changed much at all for race relations. It was just hidden. 2016 showed every one how much animosity was still there, and will always be there. You cannot be upset with the traumatized, especially if it is not your trauma. It sounds like you have a chip on your should about people who have chips on their shoulders. Its a never ending thing I guess.
Don't give your boss and your job all the fake smiles and come home with a frown on your face leave some smiles and lies for her too!! She doesn't care if you're lying just be pleasant and jovial
Real men work to take care of themselves not date and copulate. Procreation is for the emotionally weak and fragile. You are your own soulmate. Not any female. There is no paradise without sacrifice. ☮
This interview make me wanna be a better man. I have listen 5+ times and bottom line is we can keep letting our women down. They have caught the frowna and rhe anger. Enough with that!!
You are obviously correct. But, this leads me to wonder, as I see similar types of comments all the time... Why would one expect it couldn't be applied today? Or, somehow be surprised at how it can be applied today? Why do so many people find the sustained relevance even notable? Is it just that society's sense of progress is skewed by the world we see around us? Yes, we are surrounded by technological advances. Yes, everything has a different coating of paint and humans wear a different coating of clothes. Yes, the broken systems of past generations have grown into further broken systems. But, humanity does not evolve at this pace, many aspects don't change at all (or, at least they haven't yet). Perhaps people are so hopeful of leaving society's past behind, they don't realize we are merely continuing it... extending it.
Conversation like this is my aphrodisiac. Most men can’t put the ego aside long enough to hear her but she speaks what most are afraid to speak. You can’t even satisfy my body if these kind of chats ain’t happening. I love this!❤🖤💚
What did you hear her saying? Because it sounded very childlike and naive to me. Do you believe she’d be happy with her man getting fired because he stopped smiling at work so he could put on a performance for her? And her saying, he’s smart enough to figure something out sounds like she couldn’t put HER ego aside and understand the unrealistic nature of what she was asking for. Imagine a man that doesn’t make much money telling his woman that he wants her to stay at home and take care of the kids…and he’ll figure something out when it comes to the bills. Does that fly without him having a CONCRETE plan that she can understand? I doubt it. So her saying it without a similar plan shouldn’t fly either.
The fact that he is gay makes this conversation a little insincere to me, pointless even. He can do nothing for her as "his woman" and he's not speaking for all man and he cannot speak to her in that way. It doesn't fall right. Sorry to offend but I'm not being small minded or judgemental I just thought it was a wasted conversation, generally.
I don't know if it's my love for poetry or soft spoken folk, but watching and listening to these two has brought joy to my heart-knowing that everything can be fixed and resolved if we only listen to one another.
What a golden archive of knowledge I miss my real black when she had real hair down and brown not that Nicki Minaj Lil Kim bullshiter wearning a weave down today ask
Real men work to take care of themselves not date and copulate. Procreation is for the emotionally weak and fragile. You are your own soulmate. Not any female. There is no paradise without sacrifice. ☮
I absolutely LOVE how open Baldwin is to this new idea she introduced to him. Generally, people immediately reject foreign ideas that challenge what they’ve always believed to be true. But here, he seems intrigued at the this new thing that he has never before considered. He was such a genuine soul, listening to understand. And Nikki is gentle and kind, but at the same time bold and brilliant. This was such an exhilarating exchange! I have to watch the whole thing now! ❤💯
I don’t think it was a new idea to him. I think he understood what she was saying as a gay man and what he sometimes wants from other men. But I think he was balancing that with the reality of getting through life. It’s the difference between the head and the heart. Nikki was speaking from the heart, which he understood, but he was more committed to thinking with his head.
He does he says so several times in the same interview. He's trying to say while it's terrible those black men back then felt they had no release for their anger besides their families.
Woke Wooxia many white women were housewives. Not black women, many black women were never afforded the privilege to be housewives. That is a myth made up by black people who romanticize , and revise the past. The black household in America has never been stable financially speaking to survive on a singular income. Maybe in small pockets but not overall.
Sunny95 Love Hello🙌🏾 one of my great grandmothers was a nurse in the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s and my other great grandmother was a cook for a white doctor who’s wife was a housewife. Black women worked
@Amber L, So true but every community does this! You have to smile for your wife and also at work too! I’ve seen people in other races be nasty at work but be nice to their wives. You have be an emotional rock for your family!
@@niggafliesAnd how does that play out? A lot of times, it ends with that man cheating with a woman that he can just relax around. She won’t even be as pretty as his wife, but he can take the cape off around her. EVERYONE needs space to decompress. If women don’t give their man that space because they want to live in a fairytale, he’ll find it somewhere else.
That's by choice. Be genial, be friendly. No need for the watermelon grin but I guess some of us are so used to it. That's on us. I've seen too many of us, especially the men become meek and docile around white folk in particular. Not a good look.
I have watched this video 100x and everytime I watch Nikki G beg for just the slightest hint of love from her black king it brings tears to my eyes b/c I can understand both sides... ✊🏿⚡
She's not asking for love...She's asking for unwavering commitment...To his woman, to his family. Even if it tears pieces of life from him. She wants all of him. Hips resiliance & creativity...his deepest brilliance....thru the commitment of his presence. What She's asking for, is his soul...His Whole soul.. . As a matter of survival.
Nikki is THE TRUTH. Paycheck voice. Have a filter with me. Treat me like if you lose me, you'll lose everything. That's how you feel about your job. Everything is done backwards. Love your WOMAN. it's called... RESPECT
I think as an African American, this a foundational statement in how relationships should work! We have to make it work for the future! People of other races take her advice all the time!
I love this conversation and how they articulated themselves; artistic expression. It was dope hearing their vintage lingo lol; jiving, groovy cat, he's a "gas" 😏. But I also felt the pain in her expression and his; she wants him to pour into her even if he must fake it, and he wants her to understand why it's difficult. I understood both side's, what I will say is, if he can fake it at work for a paycheck it should be easy to smile and be loving at home - 'cause that's where the heart is...or should be. Giovanni expressed to Baldwin, how black women take on their spouse's frustrations and anger from work, when it should be love and happiness. Black men's rage from discrimination on the job transfers over into a beating up of the black woman, and sometimes in front of the kid's. It seems many men and women haven't been taught how to positively project their energy, due to childhood wounds, and social conditioning amongst other factors.
Real men work to take care of themselves not date and copulate. Procreation is for the emotionally weak and fragile. You are your own soulmate. Not any female. There is no paradise without sacrifice. ☮
@@denellwestthis applies to yourself also, love yourself, dont judge yourself.. she won the argument and thats rare for females these days but she won.. and I am attracted😂 she's genius..
Can we just marvel at the cinematography/camera work? They turned 2 (maybe 3) cameras into absolute gold with all the various angles and shots they were getting. Masterful.
Go out in the world and be treated like crap and smile through it all day.. Get home and frown when being treated with love.... See what she saying dont come home to me mad when i treat yiu better when i love you i as a black woman HAVE THE POWER TO HEAL YOU EVERY NIGHT SO U CAN FIGHT ANOTHER DAY. YET U HAVE TO NURRISH ME SO I CAN HAVE THAT POWER TO HEAL YOU EVERYNIGHT.
Sounds like you want the man to do all the work. If I have to work and keep up a facade even when I get home, how is my woman my peace? Literally no escape. Sounds like slave labor to keep a woman who's doing next to nothing for you happy. Sounds like the type of request a modern black woman would make tbh
i can't get enough of this conversation. i was lucky enough to come across it last year (on tiktok, of all places!) and i've revisited it several times since. nikki giovanni is just brilliant and i love james baldwin
Yeah nawl. Stop with the bs. Most black women on welfare in the 60s were married women whose men abandoned them Laws agaisnt men in the house were there to prevent derelict men who had already had a family or 2 or 3 they had abandoned from laying up in a woman's home that thr govt subsidized
I.👏🏾 LOVE.👏🏾 THIS!!!👏🏾 This is such a powerful conversation and we need to have more civil discourses like this and bring the Black family back together!🖤✊🏾 We must!!
Real men work to take care of themselves not date and copulate. Procreation is for the emotionally weak and fragile. You are your own soulmate. Not any female. There is no paradise without sacrifice. ☮
I just discovered Soul! At 44 and Ms. Giovanni in the same year. In the past year I've made more discoveries that lead me to corner myself and make new assumptions about everything I ever was taught or thought I knew. Leading me to understand the older I get the less I know and in doing so I loose a false sense of education and grasp a real understanding of spiritual enlightenment. Thank you Mr. baldwen.. Ms. Giovanni and Mr.Haizlip for pushing black arts to what it is today and for what it will mean to the youth of future generations. In a time when mental health in the black community was non-existent or talked about I wonder if the viewers of this them knew that this was exactly what they were hearing in a honest, civil and unapologetic insightful conversation of the pivotal moment when feminism pointed out that Masculism not toxic masculinity was the issue as it was then and still is now. I never graduated highschool but I was blessed to grow up with the disruptor called the Internet and the free will inherit in all human beings that are not born into or a direct product of slavery to be able to seek out and learn how powerful this is.
But the question is: What does that mean/look like? Also, will she stay with him if it takes a long time to make it happen, and they’re struggling during that time? We need clear objectives and strategies, if we’re going to make progress. If you come to me and tell me you’re struggling and I say stand up and make it happen, have I helped you?
You dont hurt those that you love bottom line. No matter how bad the day your mate or your child should not be the victim. Those are the ones you should turn to with open arms and LOVE. Not the enemies on the outer world that hate and despise your breath of existence.
If you believe that, you will find yourself hurt. They will hurt you the most bcuz you are deeply invested. People we don’t care abt can say things and it won’t hurt us, but a love on says it and it hurts the most. I look at it biblically...the people Jesus loved crucified him. We hurt God daily, so is He suppose to stop loving us. Love is knowing forgiveness and you might as well give it because you will need it.
That's what I'm talkin about back-in-the-day a real black look at that hair that's why I was at natural the way God intended it not that Nicki Minaj bulshit wearing fake Vietnamese hair weaves that's how I wanted my when I was growing up and I have no helmet enough I was hoping that one day I would have my first black girlfriend and that she well it didn't
This was such a beautiful STRONG intelligent OPEN conversation!!! I wish in 2024 people were more open to having these types of discussions! This fed my soul! Grateful for this being recorded!🙏🏾‼️🤍
Hot diggity dog what a golden archive a black man in a black woman real black woman having a conversation either one of them putting each other funeral home
"Amazing WHAT A Fantastic Speech SUCH A Delicious Magnificent Treat MR. J. Baldwin AND MS. N. Giovanni, Poetic... LOVE THIS, Classic PEACE,😯😍😁📸📺📻🎙️🍰📖😯😍😁📸📺📻🎙️🍰📖
It’s so heartbreaking to hear a man say he can’t smile to the person who loves him the most. Because he’s been knowingly fake smiling for people who don’t love him. How don’t you understand the difference between the fake and the real. Feeding what feeds you.
Black Folk need to learn to be genially pleasant and not bring out the big watermelon smile everybody's come to expect. Who's asking him to grin all day at work? Just be pleasant and genial.
Matthew 6:25-33 New International Version (NIV) Do Not Worry 25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[a]?
Real men work to take care of themselves not date and copulate. Procreation is for the emotionally weak and fragile. You are your own soulmate. Not any female. There is no paradise without sacrifice. ☮
TAKE HEART- there are many loving, and endearing relationships - just as we have witness in this vid with Niki and Jimmy - between fathers and daughters (respectively). Between mentor and the one mentored. Between partners in love, and in business. Seek it, find it. It makes everything in your respective lives lives - sustainably BETTER.
I've been trying to understand why this moves the complete me (mind/body/spirit) so deeply. It's because she checkmated him. But she could only do so by respecting him utterly. "So one of the performances will stop". She knew he was intelligent enough to refute her request for the fake by saying he couldn't fake all day and all night. She trusted him to reach this intelligent conclusion. The respect between the two of them is palpable. "The rent will get paid. You are intelligent enough and sensitive enough.." this was a different kind of poetry.
