Wasn't sure if it was worth writing this but just following my intuition. I use a unique modality that I use as my sole practise for growth and discovery. I call it Free Drawing - scribble on a page, as you're scribbling - take the view that the lines you see are EXACTLY the lines you need to see and detailed pictures will start to appear. When the page starts to look "tasty" (interesting/engaging) you will be able to go about your business with the understanding that you can use exactly what you have in front of you and nothing needs to change. Hopefully someone will get some benefit out of this!
i see that "i" am just happening and that's really scary, jesus... there's no one behind the curtain of thoughts and that's becoming clearer each "day", it really is all just happening, holy shit man.
like Angelo says (paraphrasing): it's fine, you're fine, no need to check back and see how you're doing. Or, it might feel like endless falling, but the good news is there's no ground
The description of the childhood experience at 9:10 really helps me contextualize my own experience. Being convinced that you're responsible for other people's internal states (either causing a negative one, or, in my case, needing to cause a good one) can create a lifetime preoccupation that supersedes most other experience. It's like a high-priority program that we unwittingly run. Dismantling this, or allowing it to fall apart, is my current focus. Thanks.
As someone who has spent almost 50 years believing this same thing and believing I was so "good" I applaud you for seeing this and facing it now. At 69 I'm having to deal with all these years of Spiritual Bypassing and am so grateful for people like Angelo who can aid others before years and years have gone by. Blessings on your journey 🙏💖 Just realized I made an assumption your physical being is much younger. Whatever your physical age it's good for us both. 💞
@@ravenofthewild thank you for sharing. I’m 35 now. So, while it does feel like “I should have learned this earlier,” I’m grateful to go through it now. May you continue to be a blessing to others on your journey as well!
I have known Melanie for years and she has been one of those rare people who follows her true passion and goes with the flow of life rather than trying to be in control of everything. I have always been one to stuff my own passions in life to the side, attempting to be in control of everything. She has been a teacher for me, for sure. Her music is as unique as she is and it carries the essence of that very beautiful and powerful soul that she is. ❤
felt like listening to a live shadow work session, Melanie just guiding right into it 🤜🤛 appreciated. It's refreshing to have all this humanized a bit from time to time.
So resonating with all of this testimony. And what's wrong with everyone - as a child , like deep down, all the adults were insane, lying, hypocrites. And other children were scary. Did not get how to be, trying to fit in was hard, rebelling was trouble, thankfully discovered drink and drugs 😂 that helped a lot then. Clean now. And it's like it all had to be as it was.
Wow, so much resonance! I appreciate that you spoke about childhood awakening as I totally relate to what both of you shared. I remember how as a child I would not get what everyone is doing here and that everyone seemed to really believe that any of this is true. I also remember that I would freely share what I saw and that that wasn't what people wanted to hear. So at one point combined with ongoing traumatic and abusive experiences it seemed safer to not say anything and hide behind spiritual arrogance and full on 24/7 dissociation. Looking back now it is pure grace that I'm not just still here but also back to that innocent and pure state of being. Still in awe that what once seemed not just layers but insuperable walls of suffering, trauma and stories turned out to be the gate to THIS NOW. So much love and gratitude for everyone on this journey 🙏💗
Homophones: words that sound alike but are different in meaning and spelling. Homonym: words having the same spelling or pronunciation but different meanings. (A not so discreet reply.)
LOL about the use of exact words. I find myself getting hung up on words in different non dual teachings constantly. Recently there has been a reaction to hearing people talk about the ego/identity as if it's a sentient being with it's own abilities to choose and direct us (ex: "the mind doesn't like...") and at the same time told it's an illusion, it's not real and this over analytical mind gets so caught in the dichotomies. At the same time there is such a strong recognition that words mean absolutely nothing in truth and this clinging to correct language is crazy making. And love hearing about the watching about crime and suffering. I had avoided this forever, for years was Ms. Love n Light. Lately there has been this seeming need to watch crime shows and believe I can understand the dark in others. And there has been huge judgement and shame even about this. So grateful it was brought up here. That and the effect of unpredictable people. Here it was a childhood of walking on eggshells and trying so hard to predict the unpredictable which became a lifetime of being a control freak. Thank you Melanie, I resonate so much with your experience shared here. 🙏 Love the interviews as they clearly illustrate the truth of "many paths taking us to and ending in the same place". Bless us all to awaken.
Beautiful clarity in this. Yes the emotion body of this lovely young woman wants to express itself sooo much. So wants to feel the emotions. Thanks for sharing.
The fact that there is this consciousness in all of us that is non-judgemental and untouched by the aging process & always present to whatever is happening - this is so great!
It is really great to hear someone very close to her shifts and the self that shifts and what it shifts to. So often I hear people whose connection and memory to what and who was before is distant and hard to connect to. Not so with Melanie. Thanks Melanie and Angelo. :)
Thanks for this conversation. "In a way it doesn't matter, and it's confusing to me. So do I have to work on my childhood or not?... Maybe I don't have to fix myself?" I resonate with this so much and all that Melanie expressed re childhood trauma. I'm standing right at that edge too.
I realized at an Ayahuasca retreat that my core beliefs / fears are: I'm not real and I don't matter. Turns out, that's simply true. But not in the way I thought. Not in a personal way. There's no "I" to matter or be real, or to abuse or dismiss or exile or anything. Whatever this is that is perceive as "I", it's simply folded into the universal batter. Which never bothers to turn into cookies. Or something 🤣 The universe as raw cookie dough. I always thought it was better than the cookies. Kind of like the anticipation of Christmas morning is better than Christmas morning. I guess we can live in that state. Unformed, unsure, but knowing something exciting is coming, at every moment. Knowing something is taking care of it and taking care of you.
I read your comment again and yes, there is something about this state, isn't there. for me, sometimes the beginning of a film, with the credits and music, is so powerful, even though I've seen the film hundreds of times. it's that baking state. like a lava lamp. moving forms. also I love the blank page before it's written on. the smell of the paper and ink. one might think I'm referring to asmr, which is a beautiful thing in itself but not the same as what we're looking at here. yes I totally get what you've expressed here and thank you. 🙏
I resonate with this interview. Especially the part about the mind’s mechanism that keeps suffering going. This mechanism has been operating in me all my life but somehow, I didn’t quite see it until recently. In a nutshell it starts with an inner voice or prompting telling me that I’m bad (in error, made a mistake, have done something wrong, about to be punished, and so on). This immediately activates fear that in turn activates a self-protection mechanism that directs me to hide. Hiding with its cousin denial, says the mind, will keep me safe. From this directive comes a chain of thoughts that in the past have sought to justify my actions (in case I have to explain myself). Beneath this level of thought I see my mind trying to rework the past to make it conform to my justifications. There’s more to this mechanism’s operations, of course, but I just wanted to share some of what goes into creating suffering in the event it may help others. You may wonder why I’d let this go on for so long. In part it’s due to the conditioning happening so fast that I couldn’t see what I was doing. I had to slow it down and that took time. Also, I was completely identified with it. Once I started to slow the process down and it became more “seeable” the process of dis-identification started all by itself. More and more these days I can watch my thoughts and not fall into the trap of trying to protect myself from what is only a voice in my head saying I’m bad and in danger. There’s still a lot of emotion to process though.
Iv come to understand ADHD is the result of us feeling overwhelmed by the construct..the systems the way we are expected to live, all the distractions the working 9to 5 the stress piled on stress the paper work the rushing around its all the false things we are expected to keep up, we know deep inside its not all ok it isn't how it's supposed to be, we are sensitive to it all so we struggle to be in it, but ultimately that struggle should push you to tire and surrender, I would love to talk to you one day, thankyou for your channel and all you share, you and others have helped me so much❤
I see what you mean. I was diagnosed and the construct was revealed not to be society or anything "external" but my identity that was full of doubt. Self acceptance is powerful and, for me, has completely changed my experience of attention and much much more. Take great care ❤❤❤. There is nothing wrong with you. 😊
It is funny sometimes lately when Angelo talks about awakening, it triggers a sort of rage and disgust in me. Something to look there for sure. I enjoyed this interview so much so relatable even without understanding. BTW I love you, Angelo ;)
I’m finding this conversation profoundly helpful. And wondering if maybe I’m further along than I thought. Not that I imagine I’m super far. I think I’ve had shifts but there’s a process to this also. I’ve lost literally years of my life to rumination. Hearing that someone awakened can get angry or react defensively helps me feel like it’s not out of reach for me. The host (don’t know his name) has talked about shadow work after waking up. I thought waking up eliminated the need for shadow work. It doesn’t. It might make it easier, because you don’t identify with the narrative you have about it. Thank you for this.
The work ..makes me think of my day yesterday..was really heavy ..could hardly move..maybe getting ready for the intensive next week..at the same time just finished my 5th round with "The Presence Process" by Michel Brown and my intention of this round was to be able to see the good in people (my "story " or life has been so rock and roll) so I'm very drawn to real life doc's and movies and this one I watched yesserday on netflix called "Why did you kill me" ..a story of violence and revenge to understandment..can't really say forgiveness but at least understandment and compassion.I've had a project of writing a book on my life now for many years ..started a couple of times but scraped it because it just seemed like a big complaint and that is not what I want, I want it to contain something to help people that have or are still in hell...but lately , this book is taking form in my mind in a way that I feel satisfied that that is what I want to convey.
Watching her talk made me clearly see lots of patterns in me. I was not following much of what she talked about because something else was communicated by her. She's just a beautiful, crystal-clear being. Thank you Melanie and Angelo for this communication.
When I was about 7 or so, I sat at the toilet and repeated the mantra "now" (now, now, now, now) hahaha.... In order to put myself in the present so to speak. It wasnt a big deal, yet the scenario is still very clear to my mind as a memory.
I'm in some deep shadow muck, and for me there's also a continuous return to childhood stuff I thought I had worked through before awakening. Surprise! It's back! And more deeply painful than ever. Trying to allow it and feel it and let it be exactly what it is. Trying to go through it, not around it or under it or backing off away from it. Very humbling stuff that the ego does not enjoy at all. It wants me to be already special and elegant and polished and "strong" and unimpressed and so on. It wants to keep pretending I'm that until I (physically) die. It seems to want that very badly for some reason.
I can very much relate to Melanie in regards to awakening and finding your own sound in music making. Only after awakening I have become capable of trusting my creative intuition fully and through this trust I have been able to make music that I truly want to make from my heart. Before I was always up in my head and thinking everything though. I have listened to Projection Of Stars and it's a great song, especially considering that you've made that track in the same year you started learning digital music production!
This discussion was triggering and heartbreaking, but the feeling in my chest was lighter afterwards. Something resonated and felt uncomfortable, but in a good way, I guess.
You said, "I could notice how dense her energy was". What does this mean exactly? Is it the same as low vibration or high vibration? What do both of these mean? Why is it uncomfortable?
Have you ever experienced someone whose energy can feel heavy, or emotionally dark? Where it's uncomfortable to be with them? It can even feel that being with them brings you down energetically? This is dense energy and I'm guessing what you would call lower vibrations.
Thank you for interviewing this beautiful person, and Melanie, since you mentioned still feeling this energy from your past, I want you to know about a technique called revision. It is a technique popularized by Neville Goddard, and it works wonders to overcome past situations/energies we no longer want in our lives. Wish you the best
I'm getting pain and old childhood trauma from Melanie, a lot of brittleness and self-criticism. I hope she can find a way to stop being so hard on herself, and stop expecting from so much from herself.
OK, dood, i gotta say something here. As i mentioned the other day, i only found you 1 week ago, and have been watching a few videos each day since then. What i have noticed is this: You have a penchant for violence. I forget what video it was, natch, but it was one of the "Double Barrel" ones, and firstly, that only means shotgun, so, you've chosen a violent name for that series, and then, the man sitting in his car, red hair, commented that your favorite movie is "Revolver", an extremely violent movie. Then, today you are using the example of the tribal murders in Africa, which you made a point of being over-explanatorilly descriptive about the machetes, just to make an example of how certain thoughts can be addictive. And then there's "The Work" by Inner Circle, doing spectacular work yes, but in the most voilent portion of American society... Please take a closer look at yourself. Please consider changing the "Double Barrelled" approach to life. You are doing great work, but your ego has a blind spot for it's love of violence. Feel free to delete this quote if you wish. Crispy