Not wanting kids, getting older, being the “fun one” abroad, feminism, w 🍷 

I feel like I’m talking with my worldly, experienced aunts and I dig that

For anyone wondering if bilinguals/polyglots switch to different languages mid sentence cuz we wanna seem cool and stuff, the answer is NO, it’s just that some languages have words and expressions that express what we’re feeling and trying to say in the moment better so we borrow those expressions and words for that moment then continue where we left off (please don’t hate us 😭)

She's 32!?!? Sis aged like that glass of wine. FINE!!

random but Charline’s hands/hand gestures are so elegant

so much homophobia is rooted in misogyny and hating women. from the flip side, as an often masculine lesbian, my lack of femininity and attraction to men is what so many people find offensive, because so much of womanhood and how we perceive women is rooted in attraction to men. i experience a lot more verbal assault than my feminine girlfriend because when gay women are feminine, their attraction is still "sexy" or consumable by men. mine isn't, because it's not attractive to them, because i don't express myself femininely.

Aging is a privilege I FELT THAT

This boy needs to make his own weekly podcast

the video was highly appreciated. the pressure as a women to be “useful” by having children is so damaging

Damon has the most interesting friends, where are you finding these people who will drink wine and talk about random shit with you?

Not to be dramatic but this is legit my fave series on youtube. It's the only thing nowadays that I'll actually watch instantly as soon as I get a notification for it

I just turned 30. I'm not dating and have no kids. I feel like I can take over the world.

Pls bring her back! She is so interesting

I feel so enlightened when Char said that if someone didn’t met the right person on time to have kids with, that person is simply just not here on this earth to have kids. I totally got mind blown there. I think it’s so right. My bf always says he wants two kids, and so I kinda got influenced by him. Maybe it’s because that deep down inside I think I should give him what he wants. But really I should think about what I want? Because having kids should be the woman’s choice, not others. Not their boyfriend’s, not their husband’s, but the woman’s choice.

WHO TOLD HIM NOT TO TALK ABT HIS EX ..*SMH* 😤😂

This is my fav series ever! Anyone else drink wine with them like me? lol

I had the kids conversation with my mom yesterday( we come from a middle eastern culture so you could imagine how family plays a big part in life)and it ended up with her being shocked and offended that her plan and expectations for her kids to be her ultimate life insurance was not how I'm gonna do things, I told her that having children for the sake of them achieving your vision and taking care of you is selfish and unfair for them , and that people with the same mindset should probably look into investing in other things that are not human beings, it's so crazy how society doesn't value life to the point people give up their dreams to have kids who then have to give up their dreams to take care of their parents and their own kids and the cycle continues...

“Only 7 years of fun? from 18 til 25, noo im having fun til im 100“ I totally agree mannn im just 15 but I cant wait to grow up and experience and do everything I cannn until forever mannn 🤘❤️❤️❤️

I had a daughter last year, and bringing a human into this world is not something you should do if you feel ambivalent about it. People who pressure you to have kids are projecting their own stuff on you and that's not what it should be about. Especially for a woman, having a child will change your body, your relationship to your partner, your lifestyle, your mind, your emotions, everything. It's TOTALLY understandable that if you've spent years building a life that you love, you don't necessarily want to change it so drastically. Also, it takes a village to raise a child, especially in our hyper (dis) connected-social media world, so we need people who are not exhausted from raising their own kid to be around (if they want), like an auntie or uncle. There are so many ways to be a parental figure that doesn't involve having your own kids.

I see so many of my high school friends getting married, pregnant, having kids and im just like?? Ya’ll are 21/22, how much life have you really lived...?? (Some have never even left their hometown) but to each their own, it’s just not for me 😂

I didn’t even feel like I was an adult until I was 55... p.s. I am still having FUN!

omg thank you for talking about “being boring” while speaking a new language. I’m French and I moved to Colombia for my studies and I feel like it’s really hard to be myself when I speak spanish. I didn’t think it was an actual thing

I've been married for 35 years, have two sons in their thirties and I have a six year old granddaughter. I will be sixty-four in 5 days and I still think you are talking to me. You make so much sense for travellers. You have a Paris apartment and French bank account, so I would say that you are now semi-nomadic - you have a base but you aren't tied to a place.(maybe a new business idea - Air6mois - sorry AirBNB for the blatant ripoff). As a student I spent a university year in Nice (beautiful, not as expensive as you would think as I've been back there with my wife recently), and I hitch-hiked in Italy and explored Yugoslavia by train before the breakdown of Communism. As a young parent I took our sons to Spain (very common for the English), but also to Paris, Tunisia and the United States. Since both sons no longer live at home I have been able to travel in the last few years to Frankfurt, Rome, Barcelona, Nice (again) including Monte Carlo, and Seville - you should go there yourself, it's modern, multicultural and beautiful. On the subject of children, I would say that it is the job of a parent to provide an upbringing that results in independence, both for the children and the parents. In that way you can have fun in your youth, pass on your experience to another generation, then re-establish your own independence and continue to experience new things. Your life changes as your age changes, but you can still hold onto your ideals, although you may experience from a different perspective (too serious)! Just as an aside, the first trip that my wife and I made after our sons left home was to Ibiza with the express purpose of going to Privilege, one of the most famous nightclubs on the island. I was 55 and was so concerned/stressed about how others would look at us as we were 'old'. I needn't have worried, there were people clearly in their eighties, but we were all there for the same thing - the experience. Keep vlogging, keep introducing your friends, keep drinking the wine, I wish you success.

I'm heading into my 20s and I realise I am now the age that I had been "waiting" to be because I spent 20 years being too young to do stuff or was the age where I needed to prepare (exams etc). Now I am like sh*t I should have lived a childhood more... Also best feminist quote "My coach said I ran like a girl and I said if he ran a little faster he could too" not that related to toxic masculinity but yeah.

Who else is a BoJack Horseman fan out here?

I love how genuine and philosophical this series is! I really feel like I can resonate with a lot of the topics being discussed, I've just lived one year abroad in two different universities in Europe and my mindset about dating, patriotism, and perspective about where I want to live in the future has completely changed from this experience. Idk it is really interesting

I've been thinking a lot about the idea of a timeline. So many people get caught up in a timeline and the 'right course' of action that they fail to truly take care of themselves. I love human history, I've traveled a bunch, moving abroad soon (thank all the good things in the world for that), talked to lots of people of all ages and backgrounds, Sociology and Anthropology were my majors and philosophy a minor in uni, so I've noticed these trends that leave me with the absolute certainty that the mindset of 'keeping up with the Joneses' is a big part of why the world is in the state it is today. If we look at the happiest countries in the "developed" world they're happy because systematic inequalities don't exist (or they're such a fraction of the experience that it's barely noticeable), however if we look at the "nondeveloped" world's happiest countries they're happy because they're truly carefree. They just don't give a fuck about the unnecessary bullshit of life. Money (in accumulation or excess), power, prestige, and all those things that don't matter or last after you die doesn't even touch their radar. Rather these are the people that focus on their relationships and the world around them: family, friends, community, passing strangers, the safety of everyone, and the health of the environment around them; and you see that when people don't have to care -- they don't. When people aren't forced into checking off boxes -- they won't, and they're happier for it. The idea that you have to get an education, that you have to do this or do that is honestly only ingrained in people who come from a side of world history where the _privileged class_ *denied the lower classes* of things that maybe they were interested in, and once it became something that they too could grab, it was no longer about 'I wanted this and was denied' but 'everyone has to do this because we were "all" denied for so long', and I think it's important to remember that aspect of our history as we interact with people and go through life. What our society tends to value and declare as important may simply be because of a point in history that truly _no longer_ has any ramifications or importance in this day and age, or for our own particular case. Just because rights were fought for and gained doesn't mean that any particular person _has_ to indulge, just that they *can*. No one _needs_ to get married, no one _needs_ to procreate, no one _needs_ to get a formal education, no one _needs_ to do anything, but they should however have the right to achieve whatever their life desires may be *without the judgment and criticism of people who are fine doing something else.*

I am 20 and I constantly feel a pressure to get older, like: “you have to go to university” “don’t have a too long of a gap year” and I feel like I have to plan my future, even for the next year. Why can’t I just have fun! I need to return to this video, and Damon’s other videos to remind myself, that growing old doesn’t have to be: settling down, have a family bla bla... live your life to the fullest!

It's nice that you included the clips from the "inside jokes" you have. As a Brazilian I'd have never guessed what you guys were referring to if it wasn't from them :)

6:13 "the last drop that made the vase spill over" oh my I love French

What are the next topics should I discuss in the next Red Wine Talks? 🍷

“I’m having fun till I’m 100” BIG MOOD

I'm a simple girl, I see new Damon video, I click

13:24 "I love to be around kids sometimes" I see you girl 😂

In the next one can you talk about what you classify as a healthy relationship (with friends or partners or anyone really) and how you’ve learned to fully embrace yourself

After a horrible day ( Italian + living in the UK + Boris Johnson) this video is something that will definitely cheer me up :) xxx Edit: I am 31 and I know for sure that I don't want kids (even my partner agrees lol)

Im literally 17 and I already feel judged for not planning to have kids/get married etc. I'm so glad ye mentioned about the whole not wanting to know where you'll be in 3 years bc that's exactly how I feel but there is so much pressure to have a fool-proof 10 year plan. Love ye!

They try so hard to scare women about aging as if there’s a ticking clock over your head. “Have kids by 29 or you never will!” Except adopting is always an option. And the percentage for your likelihood of a successful pregnancy carried to term is so minuscule. Don’t feel rushed into shifting your whole life around and get another human being involved.

DAMON IS SO BILINGUAL, WE STAN HOW QUICKLY HE SHIFTS FROM ENGLISH TO FRENCH

I relate so much to what Charline said about how you seem ‘boring’ when you are first trying to learn a language. I moved to the Netherlands a few months ago and have started to learn Dutch but I’m really hesitant/embarrassed to practice it with my Dutch friends because of how basic my knowledge is despite knowing that the only way to improve is through practice. I think it’s partly because I still can’t get over how good everyone’s English is and I feel less cultured by not knowing a second language as well as they do (a few have said to me oh don’t compare our level of English to your level of Dutch compare it to our third language, somehow that just makes it worse!)Guess I’m just going to have to do some hardcore learning in the coming months.

I do think that wanting kids just so one can feel less lonely in their old age is so selfish. Not wanting kids for whatever reason is valid to me. Have them when you're damn sure that's what you want. There are too many people on this earth already, so in my opinion people who don't want kids are doing us all a service. Also, the people not wanting to text you back because they don't want to thing is so valid. I just texted my ex during his finals and asked if he was "too busy" to talk. He said he is and that we should talk later. Yes, my ego took a hit, but if he doesn't want to text me back because he genuinely doesn't want to then that's fine too.

When i was 19/20 i went abroad and spent 5 months in Sweden. We were with a bunch of exchange students and 2 Americans. one of them said to me ‘being with you all here makes me feel normal. My friends and people around me are all having kids and getting married and i always felt like i was behind in life. None of you have kids or are married and some of you are older than me. I finally feel normal’ and that made me so sad.

Every time I watch these videos, I want to move to France and write 9 books lol, but fr thanks for always inspiring to travel and live life now!

I totally agree with you about the kids thing. I'm 28, a student midwife & i get asked A LOT that i must want kids in the future (mainly because of the nature of career I'm going in to). When i say that I don't know if i want kids in the future, you would think i personally offended their mother or something. It's gasps, clutching of pearls & awkward silences.

Damon is honestly the one RU-vidr I feel like I could meet and have an HONEST conversation with

For me, I think I worry that by not having kids, I won’t be able to find a valuable meaning to my life. Will it be all about career? Do I even want it to be all about career? Is career my only alternative to kids? What If my career is mediocre and I have no kids, will i feel empty? I worry that I’ll wake up one day when I’m 52 and realize I regret keeping my life entirely for myself. But idk because the thought of kids right now at 29 is SO far from what I want in my day to day life.

I feel like I’m getting life advice from a cool aunt and uncle 😭 love y’all thanks for sharing ur wisdom

I really like this. I’ve been thinking about getting older..... at 22. I know it’s crazy but there’s a weird pressure

@Damon I feel that your edit makes it look like I’m drinking so much all the time 😅 Or Maybe I just was?

I loved this so much. I personally have never wanted kids. When I was 15 I realized it was a choice and not ever woman wants to be a mother. you are at this point no longer living for yourself but for someone else. it's kind of like a taboo and people will try to convince you otherwise or think your weird . Now I'm 27 and still feel the same way, is get a dog first. They can't say mama 500 times a day 🤣

I agree so much with the 'being fun in another non-native language' part!! People dont know how freaking hards it is to be spontaneously funny in another language.

Charline spoke to me on the kids thing. It is nice to know she is in her 30s too. Like I recently turned 30 in October and it is strange. All media portrays your teens as rebels and 20s as you experimental ages. Then 30s hit and so on and you must have kids and be married,no fun. I like a lot of geeky things and like the idea of travelling. I'd love to share the experience of travelling out the states. My mom mentions the lonely thing as well as children. Maybe I will have some IF I meet the right person but the world is so cruel and honestly I can barely care for myself with my income. I can't imagine having a kid. Also it is ok to be single and it is ok to be in a relationship. But single ppl deal with so much shit this video was what I needed to hear. This whole video was great!Sorry for rambling all over.

i feel like i was in the room being part of the talk and it really was a lovely night

the not wanting kids part. my thoughts exactly

i'm 28 and i feel the same way as Charline. Change my mind like every few months (especially cuz i'm from small island Jamaica where you're just supposed to breed) but I feel like I'll know when the time is right to have one. My mom all her life didn't want them, and started having us relatively late for her generation and she said the same ting. One day it'll click or it won't and that's okay cause EXACTLY what Charline said, you'll create something in a different way.

Also, how long did it take you to become fluent in French?

8:38 Charline not using the "h" letter in the beginning is so damn cute.

obsessed w this series and particularly loved this episode !!

favourite channel atm, so fun and relatable and informative

The fact that I was sipping red wine when I saw ur video today just got me super hyped!

your page came onto my feed at the most PERFECT time. I needed to hear this convo today

Damon's channel is literally so unique and interesting. I'm here for all of it.

This is my favourite kind of videos from you! And I love how the conversation extends to the comment section so when the video ends I can just read peoples' thoughts and keep getting inspired

Charline is adorable! Thank you so much for inviting her- enjoyed this video so much

I loved these convos so much ugh speak to my soul

I loooove this series! thank you for talking about things that are actually important!!

The amount of comfort I get from watching Damon videos and knowing that I am not alone who thinks like that or weird or "I would change as I would grow old" is crazyyyyyy

I can't tell you how much i love these wine videos, they are so comforting🥰 go Damon ❤

this is literally my fav youtube series ever

Literally my favorite series on youtube. It’s incredible

growing up shouldn't mean becoming sad, lonely, and boring lol

ah love these sm Damon has a quality about him that makes all of his conversations so inviting and inclusive even though we’re not there

Gosh, I just recently discovered this series and im obsessed! This episode really spoke to me. I've always felt like i didn't belong where i live, (literally have 2 friends here rip) and I only have really connected with people on my travels. Im a bit of a nomad, so being home during this covid period I lost sight of what makes me feel alive, and got sucked into these societal pressures and ideas of success and time and money ugh. Thank you for reminding me that people like us are doing just fine, and it's all good to march to the beat of your own drum. I honestly feel so uplifted by this video, thank you!!!

I discovered your channel through your video offering tips on how to find an apartment in Paris. It made me become a subscriber and I hope to live in Paris someday. I appreciated hearing your viewpoints about different topics in this video. The importance of conversation can be underrated sometimes. Congrats to you and Char!

The thing about wanting kids is a mind twister. I've been thinking about how wanting kids vs not wanting kids, both decisions are always going to be called selfish, because no matter what the reasons are, it always ties back to what YOU want. Whether it's to make yourself happy or your family happy, because YOU want to make something a certain way.

I love these videos so much! To hear other peoples opinions who come from different backgrounds is amazing, but also it makes me feel like i'm not alone in many thoughts i have. It feels so nice to be able to relate to thoughts on particular topics, that have previously been shunned upon due to tradition!

i love these talks so much!! ugh ❤️❤️

This is the first video I've watched of yours and it's amazing. I love when people talk about the big questions! Thanks for sharing 🥰

This are my favorite kind of videos in your channel! It’s like a podcast but you don’t fell alone when you play it in your iPad next to yourself.

''7 years of fun, out of 100?- NO'' Yassss

I just started watching you guys recently and I have never been so inspired by any vloggers...um...like ever. Thank you for bringing quality content to the surface! Damon you have such a beautiful soul and Jo as well. Charline is a wholesome BADASSSSSSSSSSS. You guys inspire so much authenticity.

I don’t usually comment but I love this series and I can relate to so many things in these videos. Keep doing more!

Yay! I loved Charline! Please keep making more Red Wine Talks with her! This episode was so relevant to my life and how I feel on these topics. Its inspiring me to want to be more of a citizen of the world and live in a country that actually fits more closely to the culture and lifestyle I want to live. Thanks guys!

I would die for these red wine talks ❣️

this channel is such a gem

You should just open a Spotify poscast already

Damon you are my spirit animal! You express so well all I think!

I really enjoyed your variety of subjects that both of you talked about. It is always nice when you can discuss different things with different people and admire their perspective or respect their perspective. Keep up the great videos.

These red wine talks have been the literal food to my soul. I feel it warming me to my core and filling me up with so much substance. These wine talks mean so much to me and I am filled with gratitude to be able to receive and learn from you and your dearest friends.

My favourite episode from this series thus far!!

Love this series so much!!

i love these chats. def got a new subscriber here

this whole conversation speaks to my soul.

this video feels like a refreshing conversation

I cannot get ENOUGH of these conversation

This is the best red wine talk yet! 😍❤️

Loved this video so much! I felt like I finally relate to others on the idea of maybe not wanting kids and how others always expect you to find someone and get married and have kids cause thats all that life is about. There much more to life than just settling down, having a 9-5 job, and having kids.

I’m so glad I stumbled upon your vlog, and hand to God, I cannot stand society pressuring women into a set life of being a virgin, then a wife and finally a mother in the span of 10 years (worst case scenario) I’m married and have no desire for kids, my hubs knew this since the beginning, so our children are our dog and cat. Also that bs of man being less masculine for crying, seriously? Is a human emotion!!! My cousin (R.I.P) was gay and I saw that conflict of “you are man so you suppose to be/behave/act like a man” but he was more feminine than other gay man and was in a constant struggle between the masculinity that it’s supposed to be inherited with being born a male and his more compassionate and loving and caring side often assigned to a woman. Is sad, but the future is looking brighter in my view. So my thoughts live for you, and if you find someone that makes living even better treasure them.

Damon please bring her back! This was soooooo interesting and fun to watch! Thank you! Loved it 😌

I freaking love ur videos because they are always thought provoking and challenging 💛

I FREAKING LOVE THIS CHANNEL AND THESE RED WIN TALKS LIKE