Nrauj Koj Tag Cuag Nyob Ntuj Ceeb Tsheej. 3/30/2022 

The sad thing is so Many hmong women are wearing your shoes right now and they'll never leave their abusive, selfish and controlling husband because they feel there's no other man out there who can love them or they can be "just free" from it all. They have no idea they can walk away and he'll be nothing. Like hmong culture say... " there's plenty of hmong women out there" when i guy loses his wife. The same applies to hmong women. There's so many guys out there too! A woman's will to survive and become a better person is stronger than a man's will. Most hmong women in your situation don't see that they are doing everything with out their sorry husbands help. They can go and do it on their own. Like you said... Why do I need a man when I'm doing it all on my own. They have no idea not only will they suffer but the children will suffer to. If they don't hear your story and think it's just you. Let them feel the pain and agony years down the road when they realize 20 plus years and they still haven't found happiness. Let them learn. Let them suffer. Let their children suffer at the hands of treacherous, controling hmong husbands who has no respect and treat their wife's like slaves. What many hmong women dont realize with sorry husbands is that it isn't only about love. It's about being free and not be imprisoned to a dead beat husband. Being free is more important than love in a toxic relationship. Good story and good lecture. Im happy your are finally free.

It's takes lots of courage to leave and stand up for yourself against these cultural by-laws that are instilled by clan leaders. When a woman is outspoken she is labeled as an influencer and difficult. Times have change so we need to stand up for ourselves when nobody does. Thank you for sharing your story, it resonates with me. Confidence is everything.

So....proud of u sis! We ladies needs to be strong like u.

Sister, I’m glad you were able to leave this toxic marriage! Your ex was projecting his own insecurities and cheating onto you. So many years wasted on a worthless human being. Hmong women need to stop enduring abuse. Don’t worry about what others say because they don’t pay your bills for you. You are the master of your destiny so love yourself because you deserve love and happiness, too!

My mil kept telling me the same thing, be silent be silent don't complain its only my fault. Ok fine, when I left. I left silently. Whooom! Gone with my kids, house empty, gone silently.......

you are not the only one yog poj nrauj. my ex and his relatives told me that no one will want the ugly and dump women like me, if I divorce him, but I divorced the ass hole. found a man love and worship me like queen

Omg! This reminds me of old times. Their son is always right, even when he's wrong, and we nyabs are always the bad one. Don't matter how much we give, we nyabs are the bad ones. I'm so proud of this sister. You are strong. That's what we need more of

Sister, your first husband was a horrible man and father. I’m glad that you finally realized who he was and left him. If you are a good person, God will give you someone who will love you for who you are…you received just that, your now husband, who loves you and your kids…😩👍

Peb ib txia poj nrauj nyob ntev tsis yuav ma muaj ib txia niam cem tias yog peb tsis tsim txiaj es thiaj tsis muaj neeg yuav tiam si tsis yog vim tau tus txij nkawm phem2 tsim2 peb li no peb thiaj tsis xav yuav lawm xwb vim lo ib leeg li no peb kaj siab dua

Nyuj xaiv nyuj kev mus. Nees tshwj nees kev taug! Kev taug, yus xaiv yus.

Wow what great advice. I'm happy you found happiness sister. Thank you for sharing your life experience and wise words

I’m happy you left this relationship. Love yourself.

Your ex sounds like my husband. He was like that when I was younger. Now that I am older, idgaf what he says, and now I am the one to kick him out to his parents house. Now he lives under my skirt and my rules.

Sister koj hais yog lawm os tsis muaj txiv mas khwv tau nyiaj lo tsis muaj tus los siv nyiaj yus yeej khaws tau nyiaj dua nawb thiab nyob ywj siab kaj siab dua

Ua neej nyob koj twb ua tsis yog lawm es txob tu siab rau koj niam koj txiv nawb.

Me viv ncaus aw, leej twg ntsib tus phem li ko ces koj tham yeej raug 2 nws siab li os, qe leej ua tsis tau los koj twb ua tau lawm ces, pab nws zoo siab os mog.

Txawm yuav yog poj niam lo yog txiv neej lo yog tias peb yuav tau ib tug neeg siab phem tsim txom peb daim tawv nqaij mob mus ti hlwb txha ce yu yeej ntxub thiab dhuav tiag2 yog leej twg tau rau nkawm khau no thiaj li tsis thuam neeg.

Your ex-husband is crazy. I’m happy you found happiness.

Koj hais yog tshaj plaws ua puam lem tag lawm tiag

Ua li koj thiaj li zoo os menkauj hmoob cas tau tej nyiag txiv siab phem

Sister aw...if you still remarried that mean you still have love for man...I left my ex-husband when I was 29 because he married other women I'm 42 now and still can't date any man because of the torture of my ex-husband the hatred I have toward man..

Txivneej tsis tas nws 1 leeg tseem tshuav coob tus txiv siab zoo, mam pib dua neej tshiab.

koj mus ces zoo lawm es koj txiav txim siab yog kawg lawm os tus sister aws xav tau yog kawg nawb mog

I’m glad she’s not like those women in other stories where they be like “oh it’s my paper from heaven to stay in this abusive and toxic relationship bla bla bla”. Good for you for leaving!

Kj ua yog lawm yuav tau tog hl kj tus kheej txhob cia tis neeg g hl yus los taim yus

nrog koj zoo siab

I can resonate with this story. Proud of you sister

🥺🥺🥺😢😢😢

Ua neej tsis sib hlub tsis sib pab ces ntxov nrauj ntxov zoo xwb os , nrog koj zoo siab nawb uas koj dim tus neeg phem os

Yog lawm os tus niam tsem kuv lub Neej cas kuv yog tus swb txhua yam es kuv tus txiv yeej txhua yog tus yeej xwb os

Lub neej lam muaj txiv log ua taw xwb tsig muaj txiv log hlub,pab yug ceg tu siab txog rau qhov yug cia ruam tsig paub tham qhia rau leej twg li.tu siab heev

Twb yog tim koj niam lawv muab neb yuam sib yuav es koj thiaj txom nyem.

oh tus niam tsev nov hais yog lus kawg li os txij nov mus peb cov niam tsev yuav tau ntse tuaj nawb cov txiv tsev liam txwv tiam 21 no siab phem kawg li nawb kuv lub neej los kuv yeej uv uv txoj kev lwj siab,nyuaj siab thaum 1990 los txog rau hnub no lawm ua rau kuv mob minor stroke kiag li lawm kuv yeej xav tias kuv twb uv los laus li no lawm ces kav liam es thaum twg kuv tuag ua ntej lawm los kuv mam li rov los cab nws mus ua kuv qhev xwb no os

This lady even suggesting other ladies a 10 years of toleration first. Wow..just WoW! These women are like those dogs that got their asses sitting on nails/splinters. They bark they cry, but don’t move. Them dogs don’t move because it doesn’t hurt bad enough.. These women cry, they complain, but making no movement to change. Just no sympathy here, because if it’s that bad, they would’ve gotten up and run since when; like year 1 if not 6 months in.

Hais yog tshaj plaws li

What a great story and glad you found that one that loves you.

Cas kv nim xav hais tias kv thiaj rau nkawm nkau zoo li ko xwb, me vivncaus kj yog tus muaj peevxwm lawm os, kv los uv kv tus txiv tau 34 lub xyoos ☹️☹️☹️

Cas hais tau tu siab ua luaj menkauj hmoob aw

Txhob tu siab cov nkauj neab yeej muaj cov zoo kawg thiab os

I ain't gonna tolerate a guy for 10 yrs. I mean depends on your situation...if u are able to get out of the relationship, then get out asap...if anything, I give him 1 year. But life is short. I'm not gonna waste time on a person whose only objective is to torture me.

Tus txiv zoo li kos muab nrauj mus zoo dua mas nrhiav dua tus tshiab os

Yog tshaj li lawm os sister aw.

Nrog koj zoo siab vivncaus aw.

Qhov uas muab yuam sib yuav li koj niam thiab koj txiv nkawd ces zoo coj nkawd mus nyob nram tsev laj cuj xwb os.

Wow sister, our lives are so similar. I’m glad u found happiness. I left my ex after 8 years together. I endured so much emotional, mental, physical abuse. I was married as a teenager too, and it was the worse decision I’ve ever made in my life. Now, I am happily married to another man and I am living my best.

Cov niag tsov tom txiv neej zoo li no mas txub tshaj plaws li thiab. Xav kom nws ploj kiag mus xwb.

Tus txiv nram ntej yeej tsis zoo nawj

I'm so sorry of what you had gone through my dear sister 💗 💔 😢 but, I am glad you realized your worth and left the one who doesn't love you. I takes courage and strength to gone through what you had gone through. I'm so happy to see you had found someone whom truly 💗 loves you, now. Thanks for sharing your story and advices that we all can learn from.

Love it! ❤️

I’m glad you survived and got away from an abusive and horrible husband. It’s time to love yourself and enjoy the rest of your life.

Tsis xyaum tsim txiaj li koj txawm kuv yog niam yog txiv los kuv yeej tsi hlub thiab

Kv lub neej raug tsim txom li kj lub thiab os tu niam laus

Tus niam tsev koj uv koj tus txiv ntev tiag2 cas tsis ntxov nrauj

Kuv lub neej ces txawv tsis deb koj lub thiab mas sister…..neeg cem tias peb cov poj nrauj mas luam taws laws nrhiav tsis tau txiv yuav….lam hais xwb os….txog txij peb tsis yuav ces yog raug tsim txaus lawm es tsis xav ntsib lub neej tsaus ntuj ntxiv lawm xwb…..txij thaum kuv muab kuv lub neej xaus nrog tus neeg tsim kuv….nrauj txiv tag kuv yeej kaj siab tshaj….thiab paub hlub kuv tus kheej dua qub lawm….txawm neeg yuav thuam thiab cem los lawv tsis rau peb txhais khaus….feem coob cov poj nrauj yeej yog neeg zoo thiab rau siab khwv noj khwv haus xwb…..cov txiv neej feem coob ces yog li koj tus ex- nrauj tag ces ua dev thawj thiab xwb…. I have been single for 15 years and still going strong and happy…..tsis yog txhua tus poj nrauj yog neeg phem…. Glad you found happiness….prove to your ex- he is nothing without you.

Yog lawm

👍👍👍👍

Cas koj cov in-laws ntxim ntxub ua luaj nas. Your ex is such a waste of space. Do what you gotta do, go find that spark of joy.

Cas koj tug txiv es yuav tsim koj lub siab ua luaj,hos kuv tug poj niam los tsim kuv lub siab ua luaj thiab os

Yog kawg os Viv ncaus aw lawv twb tsis tau taug yus txoj kev ces lawv yeej hais tias yus tsis txawj coj xwb no os

Kuv ces 1 yam Koj thiab os raug tus txiv tsim tas li xwb

Phem tiag hmoob txiv neej!

Koj ruam ces koj mob xwb tsis muaj leej twg K os. Txhob ruam ruam ma ua neeg nyob na!

Yog kawg.

Most Hmong woman just don't know when to let go and move on, what a painful past.

Poj niam lub neej kaj siab ces yog tib qho nrhiav rab ua zoo nyob tshaj plaws li xwb os

Kuv nrog koj rau ib sab khau thiab os kuv uv tau 10 xyoo xwb kuv twb dhuav kuv thiaj tawm plaws lawm koj mas sivzog kawg lawm os txaus lawm os zoo siab nrog koj lub neej kajsiab

👍👍💯💯💯💯💯🥰🥰🥰

Koj mas tseem uv tsawg....kuv ces uv Tau 29 lub xyoos...yog Tau ib niag txiv ua quav Dev ces tseev yus khwv lub Neej yeej caum tsis cuag luag ...tseev yus zoo Los nw yeej Liam ntsees Tia's yus the hluas nraug ...nws yeej muaj txoj niag xav phem ..nws lub siab yeej phem ..yog paub Tias ua poj Nrauj es kaj siab li Nov mas yeej tsis nkim Neej nrog ib niag txiv Neej hmoob Siab phem siab dub quav Dev li Nov Los ntev npaum li Nov o lawv aw...

Sister, you got some good point. I feel you and agree with you.

Tos koj tus txiv tsi hlub koj los koj ruam npaum li koj ne yom.

Yog kawg os yog tau tus txiv tsi hlub tsi pab ces xum nrauj zoo dua kuv lo kuv tsi muaj hmoo tau tus txiv tsi hlub tsi pab ces xum nrauj nyias mus nyias kaj siab tshaj os kuv tus kuv nrauj tau 13 xyoo ...nrauj tag kaj siab tshaj plaws tsi muaj tus cem yus

Tus niam tsev zoo siab rau koj muaj cuab kav khiav tau tawm ntawm txoj kev tsim txom ntawm tus txij nkawm. Tabsis koj twb hais tias nrauj koj tag cuag nyob ntuj ceeb tsheej ua cas tseem hos mus yuav dua txiv thiab? If that’s was like Heaven, Wouldn’t not be married another man ever again.

Lawv ....kuv nim xav Tias kuv thiaj tau txoj Kev nyuaj siab no xwb no os lawv. Cas peb lub neej no yuav nyuaj ua luaj os lawv

So happy you’ve found happiness within yourself. Live life like you said be the wife and man so you don’t depend on anyone.

koj thiab kuv taug kiag ib txoj kev tab sis tu siab kuv nyob tau 40 xyoo diam koj tseem zoodua kuv thiab nrog koj zoo siab

OMG ! I used to be married to my ex husband for 21.5 yrs since 1997, glad I left him. Life was so much better and no stress and depression. I only have 2 kids, faces abuse and manipulation throughout my life, married to a narcissist is dangerous and no life, outbeats everything, we are pretty much on the same page in our life sister. Good job, Good luck with your life.

Most poj nrauj are innocent ones, but there are those that aren’t innocent. Lawv twb tau ib tus txiv tsev zoo tamsis mus ua zog xas ces cia li muab nws tus txiv tsev zoo nrauj mus ua poj nrauj. I don’t get it. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Omg! I'm so annoyed by this lady story. That was too much time wasted on a douchebag and his family. 20 years is a long time, she should've invested all that time and $$$$ in an investment, she'd be a millionaire by now.

I like the fish comparatives.

Good lesson 👏 👌 👍

Thank you

Marriage license is important.

sib tsim xwb a ta ua neeg zoo

First to comment

You have a terrible in law and husband. I hope that all those torture they do and say they will receive from the next woman or Nyab. Karma is a b

kuv ces uv tau 30 xyoo no lawm os cov viv ncaus aw muab xavv los mas lig rau kuv kawg lawm os

Sister aws never accept that kind of abuse. You are better off by yourself. Love yourself and your kids only. Love and care about yourself and your kids nit evil parents in laws and husband. They are wrong and evil.

Bravo! Nice story. Leave these losers. No regrets.

mloog kj cov neej neeg ua thiaj xav ua neej nyb xwb os..kv xav tau kj tug FB os

The way this mother in law brag about how she was able to control her husband 🤣 what a joke. I'm pretty sure her husband just wasn't able to get it up anymore and stopped cheating all by himself. If she was able to "teach" her husband then she would be able to "teach" her own son too. Don't worry about not find another Hmong man, there's plenty of men outside of Hmong.

Ham tsis txoj kev tsis mloog niam thiab txiv lus maj paub los sa , lawv ntshai li no ntag ! Thiaj niaj hnoob hais tab sis koj hom tsis mloog lus hwv ne !

tus muam kuv xav maj koj lub lwb ruam dhua kuv yog ib tus txiv neej thiab os. tag sij koj tus txiv koj niam yog lawv yog ib ntshe neeg siab pheem heev li koj tseem ntshais thiab lo xav ko zoo zoo nawb

Lub neej lwj siab ko CES kuv twb yog ib tug uv2 los laus TAs lawm no Cas koj yuav los hais sawv daws coj neej neeg lig ua luaj li es kuv twb tsis tshuav yam kuv CIA siab li lawm os, Niam ntsuab teev aw kuv uv txaus2 lwj kas dhi Tau 35 xyoo no lawm kuv twb muaj mob li koj hais lawm os 😭😭

Koj tus txiv tsis hlub koj los koj yuav tau luj koj tus kheej kom phim nyog nws lub siab ntshaw. Yog koj tsis yeem swb kho koj tus kheej, neb kawg yuav tsum raug sib nrauj ib hnub twg xwb. Ntawm koj tus txiv los yuav tsum yeem swb kho nws tus kheej kom phim nyog koj txoj kev ntshaw tib yam nkaus li ntawv thiab. Raws li mloog koj piav koj zaj neej neeg no mas tus xub phem rau neb lub neej yog pib los ntawm koj ua ntej vim koj hus koj kwj tse ces zoo li koj tus txiv phem heev rau koj xwb.

Kj hais sis so sis so tsi yog naj hais kj yuav tsum hais tias hais tsi so tsi so no pob

This is USA move on with your life y do u stay and complaining typical hmong woman.

Yiu know what they say, bad parenting is the result of bad kids. That why our Hmong community we some lazy Hmong men and women.

Muab xav tias koj tos tau 20 xyoo koj mam nrauj es koj thiaj ntsib koj tus txiv tam sim no yog koj nrauj thaum 10 xyoo ntshe koj twb tsis ntsib nws os.

hmong ladies need to stop living in life with husband like this... koj uv ces cuag li koj txhob txwm nyob ntau rau new tsim xwb

Dam 40 minutes of lectures