OK FINE! I'll Show You! First Time Taking It Off

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OWN YOUR. BALDING: / @baldcafe
(Don't let it own you)
So here is some context for the video. I'm not saying wearing hats alone is bad and you shouldn't do it. However, wearing hats to hide your hair loss or you bald head is not something that truly benefits you long term.
I had never fallen into this hat wearing trap when I first started going bald but 5 years after that I did! The thing that shocked me most was just how easily it happened also. Sure I had a genuinely good excuse for wearing a hat... it was cold at the time and I didn't really have a hair style so I just put a hat on. I also liked the hat it looked cool and it was handmade by some kind old lady.
The problem was..I didn't wan to take it off in the gym. I had no reason to wear it in there. I was just afraid that people had a perception of me or an expectation of what I would and should look like under the hat and I felt that if they saw what was really going on then that positive perception would change. They would be shocked, maybe think I was a little strange or that I was way too young to be looking like that. They also didn't know what I do here on RU-vid and I wasn't about to try and explain all that!
This went on for 3 weeks and when I could sense in myself that I really didn't want to take it of.. I knew that the only way to solve that issue was to take it off and FACE THOSE REACTIONS. I HAD TO FACE LIFE. And so I did. And guess what, it took about 3 minutes of slightly awkward revealing and that was that. It never got mentioned again and it was never an issue again. I adopted my little back/top knot and the hat in the gym was history.
Free yourself from hat slavery kings. Take off the hat. Show your bald head, show your balding, show your receding hairline. You have nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about!
#Hidebalding #Goingbald #baldcafe

Опубликовано:

16 мар 2024

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Комментарии : 127

@likenl4508 2 месяца назад

Bless you brother you've helped a lot of people

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

Bless you too king. Wish you nothing but the best

@simonroth4744 2 месяца назад

Never been so early to one of your videos so I wanted to say thank you for helping me dealing with my hair loss. I was starting to loose my hair 3 ago years when I was 25. Your videos played a big part in me accepting hair loss and becoming confident in my new shaved look. Your videos played a big part in improving my quality of life. I think the work you do is important to many men all over the world.

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

My pleasure man. Well done on getting it all back on track and moving on. Keep killin’ it 🤝

@simonroth4744 2 месяца назад

Thanks man you replying means a lot❤️

@Zihark_ 2 месяца назад

I've been rocking a shaved head for the last 12 years or so, and I ALWAYS wear hats, not really out of embarrassment, just habit. But as soon as you started talking I started laughing and threw my hat off...I felt so called out 🤣 It really does feel good to let the shaved head be free though...feel the wind and sunshine on it and all that

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

Let it breath some times king. Some good SPF and it’s no problem 👌

@fulwoodphantom 2 месяца назад

I'm the same, but I can't stand the cold head in winter, then in the summer when the suns out my wife always says put a hat on! She means we'll because I had bcc skin cancer some time back and I suppose she's just trying to protect me 😂

@user-db7kt1wt3x 2 месяца назад

Hey man I want to say thank you. I’ve watched your videos over the years and finally took it all off a couple of weeks ago. Great experience. That fear of the unknown is debilitating at times but what a relief when I finally did it. What a waste of time all that worrying for nothing. I say this for anyone reading that is on the fence..go for it! Great channel and thanks again, all the best. Peace everyone and you’re not alone it’s all alright!

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

My absolute pleasure man. Really appreciate you taking the time to reach out here 👍. You did it, you’re over the line and free to move on to better things. Proud of you man.

@DavidBugea 2 месяца назад

My parents were old school and didn’t allow my brother and me to wear hats indoors, so I never had the ability to cover my head all the time as a crutch. And as an adult my career required a business suit and tie, so again there was no hiding it. In a way it may have been a blessing, because later in life I had to face and accept my hair loss.

@richardevans7035 2 месяца назад

Old school my late grandparents were the same, as a teenager would walk in their house with a baseball cap and they would tell me to take it off for respect, they also told me I will be bald in the future for covering my hair up which became true 😂

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

So here is some context for the video. I'm not saying wearing hats alone is bad and you shouldn't do it. However, wearing hats to hide your hair loss or you bald head is not something that truly benefits you long term. I had never fallen into this hat wearing trap when I first started going bald but 5 years after that I did! The thing that shocked me most was just how easily it happened also. Sure I had a genuinely good excuse for wearing a hat... it was cold at the time and I didn't really have a hair style so I just put a hat on. I also liked the hat it looked cool and it was handmade by some kind old lady. The problem was..I didn't wan to take it off in the gym. I had no reason to wear it in there. I was just afraid that people had a perception of me or an expectation of what I would and should look like under the hat and I felt that if they saw what was really going on then that positive perception would change. They would be shocked, maybe think I was a little strange or that I was way too young to be looking like that. They also didn't know what I do here on RU-vid and I wasn't about to try and explain all that! This went on for 3 weeks and when I could sense in myself that I really didn't want to take it of.. I knew that the only way to solve that issue was to take it off and FACE THOSE REACTIONS. I HAD TO FACE LIFE. And so I did. And guess what, it took about 3 minutes of slightly awkward revealing and that was that. It never got mentioned again and it was never an issue again. I adopted my little back/top knot and the hat in the gym was history. Free yourself from hat slavery kings. Take off the hat. Show your bald head, show your balding, show your receding hairline. You have nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about!

@xbt2459 2 месяца назад

Same issue for me bro I wore 2 different beanies everytime I went outside like go hiking or exercising during last 2 months. By wearing that makes me feel like a different person who is "normal". But like you said it is getting much warmer and you realize you have to face life. So I stopped wearing it since like 2 weeks ago ...

@acollins929 2 месяца назад

Funnily enough I never could stand wearing a hat in the gym. That feeling of restriction when you sweat is unbearable so I always rock my bald head when working out. But absolutely can relate to what you talk about.

@bmanfitz 2 месяца назад

Hardcore skin cancer on my dad's side and lesser skin cancer on my mom's, I could care less about being bald but bald with skin cancer on it is not something I want...I know some people will think I wear them for insecurity sake but I could give a eff less about what other people think lol

@Masterpg2007 2 месяца назад

I wear a cap when I go outside in the sun, because the sun is pretty strong and always end up burning my bald white head, and whenever is too cold, because the wind literally hurts. But I always take it off if I go inside a building and happen to have a backpack.

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

No issue wearing a hat for hats sake. The issue is using the hat to hide and then feeling scared to take it off.

@Radek__ 2 месяца назад

Thank you so much ❤It's my first winter with shaved head (thanks to your channel) and I caught myself on the same thing. I'm even getting angry now with the spring. I should be happy to see the sun, right? but I'm angry that I will have to go outside without the winter hat soon. So that hat is a trap, in which we all fall down again in next winter, but my best advice is: 🤘 when you go to meet someone for the first time (or to place where you will comeback), then always try to do it without a hat. Just show the truth immediately - don't let them try to imagine your hair under that hat (their mind will always try to do it no matter what). So when you come back next time, that person will remember you and how your hair looked like, so there will be no worries to come back in a hat. Don't do it in the opposite way (in the other way)

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

Great advice to just walk in a new place or meet new people without the hat man 👍 thank you so much for the support. Keep at it king

@Radek__ 2 месяца назад

@@Baldcafe oh, you just don't have an idea, how much you helped me with your channel, to wake me up. I just believe that I can shave my head and feel better than before with the hair (when I tried to cover balding spots each day in each situation) so ... to "repay" you for that I started (one month ago) to watch your each video, from the very first one till the newest one (without rewind). I watched half of them already and I will continue in free time. Cheers mate. Greetings from Poland. 🙏

@orangelupine3761 2 месяца назад

I keep my head shaved but still wear hats. For me I’m over losing my hair now but I just really prefer a shaved head, it’s easier and neater for me, I shave once a week. I wear hats for the elements, I hate sun screen, too greasy and when it runs off it stings my eyes badly ! I’m photophobic so I use hats for shade. Hiding my dome was just an added bonus 😂

@thedeadzone9666 2 месяца назад

Helped me with my going bald. I stay subscribed ❤

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

Thank you man. Thanks for being a part of it all and I hope you'll enjoy those random uploads I do that aren't so about balding but are fun to create.

@JeepWrangler1957 2 месяца назад

This is the story of my life. Thanks

@ariq911 2 месяца назад

You are lovely either way. Thanks for your honesty.

@alinaderi333 2 месяца назад

Hey man, I live in China just like you. I've been following you for a year now. Please keep making more videos.

@bontomax 2 месяца назад

That even Baldcafe can get hat-addiction surely shows that there IS a stigma and shame in being bald. That he has to steal himself to face the world hatless like a king going into battle, is made unrecognisable, and is faced with conversations to explain it... Surely that shows that it IS an issue. There is no truly coming to terms with it. There is just the eternal obligation for men to stoically endure the humiliation lest they be emasculated.

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

The issue and “problem” with going bald is the insecurity. That is the true enemy at its core. Just being bald doesn’t inherently stop you doing anything but the insecurity you feel might. That’s it point blank

@bontomax 2 месяца назад

@@Baldcafe But why would anyone feel insecure if it weren't generally understood to be negative? I don't feel insecure about taking sunglasses off to reveal my eyes because my eyes aren't mocked and stigmatised.

@Jacks-tj9mb 2 месяца назад

@@bontomaxthere definitely is some societal shaming that happens. No question. I think the point of this channel is actually to take on the stigma head on and say “fuck you” to the people who try to shame balding/bald men. Harry is telling everyone you shouldn’t be scared, and you shouldn’t take any shit for the way you are. That’s the point mate.

@Jacks-tj9mb 2 месяца назад

@@bontomaxalso, to this point, there have been times in history where certain eye colors have been been mocked and or shamed. It’s like height, though, it’s very hard to hide how tall you are. It’s an immediate point blank telling “this is how I am.” Doesn’t mean people won’t dislike you for X or y reason.

@spino1i 2 месяца назад

@@Baldcafeyeh but you feel insecure for a reason, because women generally find bald men less attractive. Otherwise you wouldnt care

@workineu 2 месяца назад

You are more than a blogger. You are a philosopher. Your thoughts on how to normalize your presence as you are are very close to me. Thanks a lot

@gloriouskatatsumuri 2 месяца назад

Harry James and the Philosopher's Dome.

@ollysombrero8427 2 месяца назад

I put on that black, artsy beanie and all of a sudden, in my head, the baldness, the head shape, the ears, all of them are gone. All of a sudden I have long luscious glorious hair covering all of my insecurities. I'm cooler. I'm healthier. Harry is right it is addicting. And there's a certain amount of anxiety attached to taking it off in front of people (especially people who've only seen you with the beanie on). The more you use it as a crutch the more crippling that anxiety becomes. You take it off though, and immediately you realize OOOOH NOBODY GIVES A FLYING F*CK ABOOUT ANY OF THOSE THINGS. NOT A SINGLE SOUL GIVES TWO F*CKS. F***CK MEEEE I'M DELUSIONAL.

@xbt2459 2 месяца назад

so fucking true bro ...Same thing also happened to me 1 or 2 months ago. I was so addicted to the beanie and I wore it everytime I went outside , thinking I was way cooler and healthier...

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

Nailed it bro

@mrhouse8936 2 месяца назад

I know you don’t like it but the hair fibres you tried looked really good with the tied back hair 😂 dunno if it comes off easily but it actually looks pretty good 👍

@foxhound13 2 месяца назад

I know exactly what you are talking about. Since the shaved head because of watching your vids I don’t where hats too often, but only for sun and warmth.

@NeilofBeeston 2 месяца назад

When I first shaved my head I wore a hat. That was 4 years ago. The last 3 years I have worn a hat less than and less. I shave my head everyday and I just regard it as a bald hairless style. I only wear a hat when it is really sunny or very cold.

@nacktheslayer9882 2 месяца назад

Been shaving my head for the last two years. I did hide behind a hat for a while, but it was part of my style. Nowadays I wear a hat when I want to or if it's really cold or I'm going to be in the sun for an extended period of time. Beyond that I don't feel the need too and I can't wear one at work anyways.

@CrottinDeChevre 2 месяца назад

Ive been wearing one 24 7 for the last 5 years, its a nightmare

@jimbo0411 2 месяца назад

Amen, i understand, 15 for me and I never wore a hat ever before that.

@CrottinDeChevre 2 месяца назад

@@jimbo0411 omg, times flies..

@terriblegamer9267 2 месяца назад

Keep up the vids. Great work sir 🫡

@brandondolan4009 2 месяца назад

You growing the hair back out brother? Looks great either way! 💪🏼

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

no this cottage was from a while back but I still wanted to share this important point 👍

@RainesReport 2 месяца назад

I've had this same dialogue play out in my head at the gym. Luckily, the baseball cap trend in the gym has become normalized. It helps in the sense that a cap in the gym doesn't look out of place, but not really helping me face my fears either lol.

@AbdulKhader-786 2 месяца назад

I wear a skullcap all the time (except when sleeping, showering). Western culture considers it weird to wear a hat all the time, and our Religion considers it weird to be bareheaded all the time

@anhampton5465 2 месяца назад

So u going back to having hair then?. I've found that i too have been insecure about what i looked like being bald. Some of it stems from my head breaking out after shaving it. A friend of mine who is also bald suggested an exfoliating pad to help get the breakout to go away. Any suggestions would be appreciated cause i do wear a hat when my head is broken out too much

@Rojomanzana438 2 месяца назад

5:30 that shot of you walking shirtless in that hallway to ''Satisfaction'' is not something that I thought I needed to see mate XD

@nathanfoust7989 2 месяца назад

Do you happen to have a video on how to deal with balding based on face shape?

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

No because the same rules will always apply regardless of the shape of anything

@Masoom187 2 месяца назад

Legend. What electric shaver would you recommend?

@hazear7108 2 месяца назад

I'm 22 I've been dealing with Hair loss for 3 years now I shaved my hear 2 years ago and I still can't take my hat off and it's mentally destroying me everyday I go out, I feel so chained and restricted 😢

@mbras9176 2 месяца назад

Hey. I am 34 and i was balding from the top of my head since i was 20. I shaved today, but dunno, i feel kinda a regret. Is that normal in this process? How you guys deal with it?

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

What do you regret about it? In 2-3 months you’ll be right back where you were

@jimbo0411 2 месяца назад

I have learned when you wear a ball cap all day long, every day at work, people don't take you serious. I don't even look good in a ball cap. They eventually think you are odd and a buffoon. I am going through this for 15 years. I am very very bald now. My buddy has gone through it for 45 years since he started balding. Eveyone used to try to pull his hat off at work. They looked down on him.

@anhampton5465 2 месяца назад

Also how many times would u suggest shaving my head a week? i saw someone on here say they do it once a week .i currently do it about 3-4 times a week

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

I think once a week or twice a week is fine. Where do you feel most comfortable?

@anhampton5465 2 месяца назад

@@Baldcafe i really havent tried the twice a week much yet( normally i shave 3-4) but i think i'll start this week for awhile and see how that goes. Once i get the bumps under control i'll be more open to not wearing a hat in public.

@anhampton5465 2 месяца назад

@@Baldcafe thank you for the reply and the suggestion sir!

@shyman99 2 месяца назад

Hats don't serve a purpose because people just assume you are bald and hiding. So it actually makes you look both bald and mentally weak. A man who has the confidence to show their head is a man who is a warrior and strong af.

@eliethia1197 2 месяца назад

I agree to a point - Although, as a bald female, I do need to wear a beanie to my client face to face job. For the sole reason so as to not cause other people to have a full on meltdown b/c I have no hair! :)

@shyman99 2 месяца назад

@@eliethia1197 - No one will think a female with a hat is balding, so you are good. No one associates balding with women. But I have a feeling you rock a bald look. I remember Sinead O'Connor was doing it 30 years ago. I was jealous because she looked so good.

@eliethia1197 2 месяца назад

@shyman99 - ✌🏽

@steviefazza8750 2 месяца назад

I don't understand it at all. Im embarrassingly balding and it does make me feel ashamed every minute of every day feels like a constant nightmare but I never complain to anyone I just keep it hidden behind this stupid ridiculous scruffy hat. Where as one of my best mates always...and I mean always has a beenie on no matter what and the weird thing is he has probably got one of the best hairlines I have ever seen on a male. It totally baffles me lol

@shyman99 2 месяца назад

@@steviefazza8750 - If you feel embarrassed and ashamed of balding, yet have been a follower of this channel, then you haven't been paying attention. That is what is really baffling. Not that your best mate wears a hat but has hair.

@eraysona 2 месяца назад

wow, how easy to make a youtube video. I am just making it bigger in my eyes. Thanks to you I am going to make just one more video it is not a big deal.

@richardevans7035 2 месяца назад

Respects to my Plymouth brother 👊

@nameless8674 2 месяца назад

What if its cold

@assassinskillz123 Месяц назад

Everyone staring at you mate

@tur74d56 2 месяца назад

Where are you now , you living there

@goliatheater67373 2 месяца назад

I usually always wear a cap outside to protect from the sun, but take it off inside

@carlofarese1298 2 месяца назад

Hat fishing 😂👍

@drizzlydr4ke 2 месяца назад

why the long hair tho?

@giaimeferrigno5144 2 месяца назад

In my case i'm just a hat lover from before. Correlation is not causation😂

@DanTheMan221 2 месяца назад

❤❤❤

@lassebongo126 2 месяца назад

I'm wearing hats outside if it's cold or it's the middle of the summer. Indoors? Never.

@mrbeeoutdoors3213 2 месяца назад

To say I don't care is a lie, I do care... but I also try not to care meaning I don't wear a hat, but like you, winter time is the worst because of hats... I wear one because its cold, I keep wearing it, I gain the 'no one knows' confidence cloak-er-hat, then it the worry sets in. The other day I hopped in the car and realised I'd forgotten my hat... decided I couldn't be bothered to go back in, so made that little break then.

@brkushal8904 2 месяца назад

Get an smp ,scalp micro pigmentation

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

For what?

@lamebubblesflysohigh Месяц назад

Lets make chonmage hairstyle cool again

@sebe2648 2 месяца назад

samourai shogun😉😉

@danielreiss-cy4zr 2 месяца назад

Take it off. Take it all off. In a way we're like adolescents, self-conscious of imperfections that others see and ignore, because everyone has some and they don't really matter. Take your cue from how others look at you. Surprise!

@acollins929 2 месяца назад

I found that you need to impose some rules to help banish the hat "crutch" (as you accurately put it) to permanently move past it. For me, if I'm indoors then I tell myself no hat. Gym? No hat. Popping to the local store for 5 minutes? No hat. Over time I found this became second nature and I only now wear hats on sunny days. Of course, bald or not there are occasions that a hat is essential. For me, as a pale skinned white guy living in a part of Asia where temperatures can be a sizzling (and blinding) 31 degrees Celsius or more for 4-5 months a year, I simply MUST wear a hat or I'll not only have a sunburn from hell but am at highest risk of skin cancer. Nothing to do with hiding but protecting myself from literal harm.

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

It’s good advice 👍 thanks for sharing

@user-id1il5bm6p 2 месяца назад

But why do you keep growing it out do you want to just have hair again which is fine btw but you did this last year growing out hair. Just genuinely curious. Why would they react its just a balding guy lol

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

I grew it out to show that balding isn’t the shit show we can worry it is

@user-id1il5bm6p 2 месяца назад

@@Baldcafe I understand that but you already did this last year growing out the hair. But don't get me wrong i support what your doing.

@iamaced479 2 месяца назад

Did you delete my comment

@TheBurak47 2 месяца назад

I think that lady didnt like your new look Harry xd

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

She got over it she was shocked for sure

@luiseloycanterogutierrez8870 2 месяца назад

Pole

@elemair9210 2 месяца назад

I'm pretty sure nobody in the gym cares

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

Exactly

@RKO1988 2 месяца назад

Can u try growing out the side and doing a combover, baldy?

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

Already did it 👍

@RKO1988 2 месяца назад

@@Baldcafe no but do a huge combover that looks real

@exactly1176 2 месяца назад

Hair are so important at framing the face. You look soooo much better with your long hair on this video than completely bald

@omylolxDDDDD 2 месяца назад

Yes hair are important at framing the face, thats why we should not cut It bald

@Leecasperly 2 месяца назад

I changed jobs cause they didn't allow hats.

@Baldcafe 2 месяца назад

Not the first time I’ve heard this story man. You still in the trenches with it all?

@Leecasperly 2 месяца назад

@@Baldcafe yeah I probably am gonna go the toupee route or move. I do walk around with no hat when I'm not in my hometown of NYC. I don't feel comfortable here in NYC people are very mean. I use to get nasty remarks when I had hair I could only imagine now.

@k00lkane Месяц назад

Why were you wearing a hat indoors in the gym anyway my man? 😂

@Baldcafe Месяц назад

The first time was hat hair. Cold outside. And then from then on cuz I didn’t want the big reveal.

@JohnJustJohn1 Месяц назад

You actually look better with the hat ffs 😂

@benironside1264 2 месяца назад

The racism you faced in this video shocked me

@Dr.Lemmy_C_Yasnatch 2 месяца назад

Harry, you're a handsome mf. If youre going to keep the hair like that, you should throw in some 70s style shades and keep a cigarette in your mouth at all times lol.